#Finsterl Tyto

[creative-jackalope]

Artwork by me - image ID included - click for full quality! These are my original characters. Please do not tag as kin/me/id etc. and do not use, repost, edit, etc. without permission.

Background photo from Unsplash.

An overwhelmingly cathartic little image for me... This is an after-the-horrors-are-over photograph taken of Finsterl and his twin brother Deslie, who he'd been separated from for nearly a decade, finally back together and celebrating their 38th birthday. I make him go through all of the things all of the time, it's nice to let him have a happy ending.

[Original date of artwork: 28 / 02 / 2024]

Lil' bonus under the cut of the image without the photo effects.

[victoryillustrations]

Animal symbol version of my character Eric Elsonheir and @creative-jackalope character Finsterl Tyto

[angstingantlers]

(Not) Real

Featuring: Finsterl Tyto & Hemlock [OCs]

Whump: post-abuse, past psychological abuse, flashbacks, paranoia, hallucinations of an abuser, verbal degradation, manipulative language. Nonhuman characters & fantasy setting.

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Finsterl realised his brain rot was probably significantly worse than he thought when he started hearing the branches tapping at his window.

There were no trees outside. He was always careful to make sure there were no trees near his safe places, and especially not his home. A quick glance outside was more than enough to verify that no saplings had spontaneously sprouted since he last looked; nothing was near his window, no plants or animals in sight.

He still heard it. Insistent. Nagging. Even as he stared at the glass and saw nothing, he heard it there.

... It wasn't real. He knew that. Perhaps that's why he didn't immediately scramble for his gun when he heard the gentle giggle from the corner.

He thought it was the corner, at least. When he swung around, the sound only moved with him, staying behind him no matter which way he turned. His darting eyes stared wide and frantic into the empty room.

Finsterl shivered.

Still, he took a slow, deep breath and tried to shake the tension from his shoulders, turning back to his desk. Focus on work. Ignore the coiling shadows and the creak of wood and that fucking laughter dancing in the corners.

But no matter what -- he could never hope to ignore her voice.

Having fun, Finnie?

Sterl froze.

Get your gun. It's here. Get your gun get your gun get your--

"You're not real," he stated aloud. It was quiet, a shake under the words -- but it was full of conviction.

When he received nothing but silence in return for several minutes, that was almost enough to help his racing thoughts settle. Sometimes that was all he needed. Sometimes the real sound and weight of his voice could ground him well enough.

Foolish thing.

Do you really think you could do any of this without me?

Finsterl grit his jaw, his feathers slowly lifting as he fought to keep his breathing level. He knew he should just ignore it. It wasn't real anyway.

He still muttered to the empty room, "I can. I do not need you."

You will watch your research crumble to nothing and your mind right alongside it. Pathetic, ungrateful creature.

His claws tapped furiously on the desk. He reached for his coffee mug, cold and almost empty though it was -- raised it to his beak and inhaled, long and slow. The smell was weak and distant.

Her voice continued to croon gently.

Your weak little soul will never survive alone. Just look at you. You're broken. That you still believe you will ever save him is laughable. You can't even save yourself.

Useless.

"... If I am so damn useless, then what fucking good am I to you?"

It didn't reply to his question. Obviously. Because it wasn't real, and he knew that, just like he knew he should stop entertaining this.

But he listened to her words anyway, just like he always did.

Do you know how much work I put in to keep other Eldritch away from you? To prevent them taking advantage of your episodes and vulnerability? Such a fragile naïve mind, with such a powerful domain... Without me to shield you, they'll come from miles around to claim you for themselves.

"You invited them to me, you bastard," he hissed, voice cracking. "They only ever found me at all because of you."

They will come. And they will eat you alive. So many have already had a taste of your despair, and with a monster as pitiful as you... they won't be able to resist going for the full meal.

Just imagine what horrors they'll be able to commit with your hands, dear. You've already seen what they're capable of.

"... That isn't--"

Red pools swam in his vision, covered his desk and hands, his clothes, his feathers. Every breath tasted of iron.

Finsterl shook his head and blinked it all rapidly away, pointedly not looking to the shadowed corners of the room and the countless eyes watching him.

It wasn't real. She wasn't there. There was nothing there.

... I do wonder. Can you really keep all the Eldritch legions at bay with that little trick of yours alone? It may fought me off once, but does it even still function? Can you be so sure it's still enough to keep you out of their grasp?

"Shut up." It was barely above a whisper, half-choked by the panic gripping his throat and chest, bloody claws gouging at his desk. "Just shut up."

... Oh.

That damn giggling. Dripping with pity. Laced with fake concern.

Are you scared, dear?

Sterl whipped around and hurled the mug at the corner. It shattered against the wall, leaving nothing but a dark stain on the wood and scattered ceramic on the floor.

The spray of liquid almost looked like woven branches.

Finsterl tore his eyes away from it as his shoulders heaved, his fists clenched. It took him far longer than he would have liked to untense his muscles and finally sink back down into his chair. Despite his best efforts, he couldn't quite get his feathers to flatten.

It was all in his head. He knew it was. It always was.

Knowing never made it feel any less real.

[scholarfinsterltyto]

Blogwide CW: Scopophobia, paranoia, unreality, abusive behavior, horror, violence, and general mature/dark themes.

DNI, blog info, & tag list below the cut.

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About the Blog Owner

My name is Hunter, he/him. I am a queer, neurodivergent, and mentally ill adult over the age of 25. I'm a digital artist and writer who tends to be drawn towards horror, tragedy, and content involving either my original characters or specific fandom characters I've latched onto. I am white and live in the UK, and have a BSc (Hons) in Criminological & Forensic Psychology.

My main special interests include the horror genre and the nature of fear and trauma in media, psychology (especially in relation to rehabilitation and prison reform), prehistory, and my original characters.

I have a big interest in deconstructive and meta narratives as well as unreliable narrators with complicated morals. I love exploring mental health, trauma, unhealthy behaviors, and recovery as a complex and involved process... mostly via this sad wet rat of an owl who would really like to lie down.

About Finsterl Tyto

Finsterl, also known as Sterl, is an original character I created for a homebrew TTRPG campaign run by a friend of mine. He is a jaded, paranoid, and easily-irritated middle-aged owl-man with a lot of baggage and far more emotions than he'd like. Being a scholar and wizard who is afraid of his own magic, Sterl tends to rely on logic, intellect, a quick mouth, and a gun to try and solve his problems. Unfortunately, he is also his own worst enemy, with a lot of self-destructive and isolationist tendencies and great difficulty trusting in anyone -- even himself.

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DNI

I am very liberal with the block button. Consider this a heads up that if you follow/like/reblog from me and I notice you fit the following criteria, then I will block you (and report you, if appropriate).

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⦿ The usual suspects: radfem, nazi, support Palestinian genocide, other bigots, MAPs, zoophiles, radqueer, etc.

⦿ LGBTQ+ exclusionist (transmed, anti-MOGAI, against mspec lesbian/gay, against aspec/arospec/aplspec identities, etc.)

⦿ System exclusionist (anti-endogenic, sysmed, etc.), against informed self-diagnosis for disability/illness, or 'fakeclaims' others

⦿ Proship/anti-anti/etc., treats pedophilic/incestuous dynamics as cute/desirable, ships real people, or posts kink content featuring underage/incest/RPF

⦿ Blogs that encourage self-harm or heavily focus on IRL self-harm -- including EDs

⦿ Blogs with a heavy focus on discourse/drama regardless of your particular 'stance'

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Tag List

Characters [;;chara] Deslie -- Eric -- Efera -- Mera Ersterl -- Pensterl -- Harmonic Hemlock -- Bishop -- Eldritch Chorus -- Blackened Sun -- Stochast -- Eidolon -- Gods

Themes [;;theme] Mathematics -- Research -- Logic -- Six -- Misfortune -- Choice Willpower -- Control -- Morality -- Ego -- Conflict -- Life And Death Memory -- Soulsong -- Journal -- Truth And Lies -- Trust -- Narrative Hallucinations -- Fear -- Paranoia -- Guilt -- Anger -- Sadness Isolation -- Loss -- Trauma -- Self-Destruction -- Sleep -- Recovery Blood -- Hands -- Trees -- Blue -- Eyes -- Music -- Dice -- Bones Guns -- Cursing -- Books -- Coffee -- Chess -- Rain -- Skies -- Orote

Other Artwork -- Commissioned -- Gift -- Original -- Asks

[creative-jackalope]

Artwork by me - image ID included - click for full quality! This is my original character. Please do not tag as kin/me/id etc. and do not use, repost, edit, etc. without permission.

It's a weird day when you find out that you were apparently created directly from a goddess' influence. Especially when said goddess is the Goddess of Order and Misfortune (among other things) and also the other gods tried to assassinate her but you accidentally saved her life and now she may have taken charge of the narrative just a teensy bit.

[Original date of artwork: 04 / 05 / 2023]

[victoryillustrations]

My art of @creative-jackalope character Finsterl.

[creative-jackalope]

Artwork by me - image ID included - click for full quality! This is my original character. Do not use, repost, edit, etc. without permission.

Meet Finsterl Tyto! A scholar and a mathematician and a very sad man.

[Original date of artwork: 22 / 04 / 2023]

[creative-jackalope]

Artwork by me - image ID included - click for full quality! These are my and @victoryillustrations' original characters. Please do not tag as kin/me/id etc. and do not use, repost, edit, etc. without permission.

Inspired by a scene from a roleplay I've been doing with @victoryillustrations! Gunshot wounds to the stomach are nasty little things...

[creative-jackalope]

Artwork by me - image ID included - click for full quality! This is my original character. Please do not tag as kin/me/id etc. and do not use, repost, edit, etc. without permission.

Other people can hurt you terribly. But sometimes, the worst things are what you do to yourself.

[Original date of artwork: 19 / 08 / 2023]

[creative-jackalope]

Artwork by me - image ID included - click for full quality! This is my original character. Please do not tag as kin/me/id etc. and do not use, repost, edit, etc. without permission.

This is quite possibly to date the single piece of artwork I am most proud of. I'm delighted by how this turned out.

[Original date of artwork: 09 / 07 / 2023]

[creative-jackalope]

Artwork by me - image ID included - click for full quality! This is my original character. Please do not tag as kin/me/id etc. and do not use, repost, edit, etc. without permission.

The gun is a flintlock pistol and its name is Calculus. It means a lot to him. It's saved his life more times than he can count.

[Original date of artwork: 22 / 05 / 2023]

[creative-jackalope]

Artwork by me - image ID included - click for full quality! This is my original character. Please do not tag as kin/me/id etc. and do not use, repost, edit, etc. without permission.

Various sketches from over the past few months. Words genuinely cannot express how much this bird has taken over my brain.

The second set of images are illustrated lines of dialogue from the TTRPG itself.

[creative-jackalope]

Artwork by me - image ID included - click for full quality! This is my original character. Please do not tag as kin/me/id etc. and do not use, repost, edit, etc. without permission.

There is something very wrong in Finsterl's soul.

Text on image is lyrics from Voices In My Head by Falling In Reverse.

[Original date of artwork: 23 / 04 / 2023]

[creative-jackalope]

Artwork by me - image ID included - click for full quality! This is my original character. Please do not tag as kin/me/id etc. and do not use, repost, edit, etc. without permission.

Was chatting about The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals by Starkid and one thing led to another...

Lyrics in the first two half-bodies and the full-body are from the song Inevitable, lyrics in the third half-body are from Let It Out -- quotes in the busts are from the musical also.

[creative-jackalope]

Artwork by me - image ID included - click for full quality! This is my original character. Please do not tag as kin/me/id etc. and do not use, repost, edit, etc. without permission.

He's... not exactly a stranger to getting a punch to the face. Happens when you have a mouth like his.

[Original date of artwork: 25 / 05 / 2023]

[creative-jackalope]

Artwork by me - image ID included - click for full quality! This is my original character. Please do not tag as kin/me/id etc. and do not use, repost, edit, etc. without permission.

Back to the OG universe boy... Finsterl and the Eldritch that he was tormented by, Hemlock. She's a nasty piece of work.

Image text is from the song Forever And A Bit by Mother Mother.

[Original date of artwork: 19 / 03 / 2024]