#GUYS AM I DOING THIS RIGHT???? I'VE ONLY EVER USED TUMBLR FOR LURKING I'M SURE YOU CAN TELL

[welcometomypersonalhell098]

Beauty of the Mundane

Set in the Biting the Hand that Feeds AU

just a lil drabble I thought about while drawing this attack for @xitsensunmoon​ !!!

in which you literally do nothing, and Moon has a bit of a crisis

It was a normal day, all things considered. You took a late night shift today, and besides the normal trials and tribulations of being a doctor in this city, there wasn't anything really to complain about. No Karens, no lifethreatening emergencies, and you even got a thank you card from a boy you helped through your donations  And even though your eyebags were noticable and your body tenser than a taut bowstring, you took your wins when you could. You open your door and even cook dinner that night (yay!) while chatting up a storm with your vampiric roommates who are secretly as overjoyed as you that you had a good day. After a shower and a clean change of clothes, you all but flop into Moon's arms with a one round trip to dreamland. The routine started as a teasing remark one cold night, Moon recalls, the heater was busted and the poor human was shivering like a leaf. So, as a suggestion ( with no ulterior motives of course), he offered his lap as a solution. He does have a wonderfully warm fluffy coat, you know. He was met by flimsy excuses paired with embarrassed expressions the first few times, but he knew you couldn't resist him in the end. Soon, it became a part of everyday life with your lunar-themed friend: he gets your blood, gets to be by your side while you rest, and teases you all the times in between. Rinse and repeat for basically the foreseeable future. Moon looks down at your resting features now as his reminscing is interrupted by gentle snores. You looked so peaceful, the day's stress washed away entirely as you lay in the glow of moonlight. A certain feeling begins to creep up in the vampire's mind as he sits with you, he can't quite put a name to it. It was nice though. Being depended on, he thinks. Your relationship with the brothers were a little (a lot) parasitic in nature. It was nice to be able to give something back that wasn't the excuse of "entertainment" or "better food". The feeling sort of stews for a few minutes in Moon's mind.... ...Until, like a panther after stalking its prey, the feeling is suddenly realized and had you not been currently in Moon's lap, he would have jolted with a concerning violence. His usual smug smirk now reduced to a stunned expression and eyelights completely dark. He likes this. This meaning the quiet moments with you. Not just the playfulness and drinking of your blood -- both great things do not get him wrong -- but the everyday moments. The domesticity. And as he spirals, he realizes something else. Nothing about the individual parts of your with him relationship really have anything in common. Not the blood, not the quick witted conversations, and most certainly not these late nights. Nothing....except you. Maybe, just maybe...that means he likes you more than he thought. As he looks down at you again, it feels more special this time. As if time has stopped just for Moon to drink in all of your features, to try and figure you out as you slumber. And that's the kicker, he thinks. You did nothing but sleep and yet you managed to get a rise out of him. He quietly chuckles. You really are something. He thinks back to the first time you met. And then all the memories that happened in between then and now, good and bad. He looks back down at you. Yeah, you really are something.

[equalseleventhirds]

"I don't understand how I'm losing," Reigen said, his hands flying over his keyboard. It was so late now—too late, maybe—if only he'd used the same technique as with the Player Killer from the beginning, he might have stood a chance, but he hadn't seriously thought he'd lose—

"Shishou," Mob said, "why is this so important? You already have second place from Twitter."

Reigen laughed, not at all nervously, and splayed a hand across his forehead. "You don't understand, Mob. The publicity from something like this, even a rematch, would do wonders for Spirits and Such. This is about business."

(He would never admit to his pride being on the line.)

"And anyway, who is this guy? A radio host? I've been on TV, you know."

Mob carefully did not bring up what had actually happened when Reigen made his television debut.

Ritsu had no such qualms. "When they exposed you as a fraud? That was publicity too, right?"

"Hey—!"

Serizawa leaned over Reigen's shoulder to see the computer screen, careful not to spill the tea he placed on the desk. "Oh, Cecil from Welcome to Night Vale? It's been a while since I listened to that, maybe I should catch up."

Reigen stared at him. "You? What? Serizawa?"

"Ah... yeah." He rubbed the back of his neck. "Back when I was... well, when I didn't leave my room much, the podcast was popular. I guess it gave a sense of... community? Feeling less alone, even when you are." He shrugged. "Plus, hearing another gay man in a show like that was comforting."

"He's gay? Canonically?" Why can't I be gay canonically?

"Sure, he got married in episode 100. It was very emotional."

"I nearly died in our chapter 100—"

-- -- -- -- --

Well, listeners, there's still a few hours left on the poll, but I'm now leading at 56%! I must say, I did not expect this, especially after Twitter users so clearly forgot—or perhaps never knew—about my Tumblr Sexyman Origins.

But, that's neither here nor there. I certainly am grateful, if a bit bemused, about all of this, but let us not forget that this is all a friendly competition. Unlike the annual War On Christmas—and let us all take a moment to remember our fallen allies against that terrible holiday foe—this is a battle of kindness. Love, even. The love we feel for Tumblr, for our favorite sexy men, for pressing a button on a meaningless internet poll. The love we feel, listeners, for each other.

And in the spirit of that love and friendliness, I figured I'd get to know my opponent a little better! A bit of googling, which of course you know means searching via every search engine but Google, what with the Town Council imposing the Google Search Tax and getting all Night Vale IP addresses shadowbanned, has led me to... oh my, listeners. I do not know who made this, but Reigen Arataka has the single most beautiful professional web page I have ever encountered. It's... words do not do it justice. I am tearing up. This... I could not make anything better myself.

A-hem. Listeners, now that I've wiped away the tears such beauty inspired in me, I can now see that Reigen's website advertises his business, one Spirits and Such Consulting. Well! We may be rivals in this moment, but I am overjoyed to learn that Reigen runs such an innovative and important business! I am nearly ashamed that, while my opponent works to make the world a better place, I, a mere community radio host, am winning the sexyman contest.

Nevertheless, we must respect the polls. Not respecting polls could get us in hot water with the Town Council, or with the demigods of numbers who lurk in the sharp edges of percentages. So since I can't hand my victory over to him, I think I'll do what I can as a community radio host, and promote Reigen Arataka's important business!

So if you're a spirit in need of counseling, a ghost in need of therapy, or an eldritch beast in need of a shoulder to cry on, head on over to Seasoning City and pay our good friend Reigen a visit! I'm sure he'll be pleased as anything to see you.