#Good thing Vegas is pretty because clown make up doesn't look good on just about anybody

[yujeong]

VegasPete and Childhood's End: a deranged attempt at connecting two completely unrelated things

Hello there, fellow VP enthusiasts. This post here is my remaining 2 braincells trying to come up with ways the silly, little book known as Childhood's End by Arthur C. Clarke and the silly, little couple known as VegasPete are connected, and how the show chose this book for Vegas to be reading in episode 11 for reasons beyond its title. I swear it's true, I asked Pond, he told me about it, trust me. I said in the tags of this post that I have started reading the book because I have a fic idea I wanted to write (which will happen next year now, after I finish the book), and after I shared my observations on the kindergarten mafia server, I thought to myself why not make a Tumblr post too? So, here I am. I would like to clarify that I will be spoiling major parts of the book, obviously, so anyone who doesn't want to get spoiled, don't read this post and the ones after it. Also, this is the version of the book I bought like 5 days ago from a well-known bookshop at the center of Athens, which sells English books too, bless them. Just so you know what my source is. (Unfortunately, getting the version Vegas was reading might be difficult - if not impossible - in Greece to find, because I believe it's one of the first editions? I'm not sure. Nevertheless, I have the book in my hands, which is what counts.) If I make any mistakes in regards to the information I'll provide about the book, the story and the characters, I apologize in advance. It'll probably be me not being careful enough while reading it and missing sth. So, without any further delay, here we go:

The basic premise of the book is a concept that's become cliche in the recent years: aliens called the Overlords have taken over the Earth, bringing prosperity to it but leaving humans with having no actual freedom in their choices. So, reading up to page 34, we learn that there's a specific Overlord called Karellen who's responsible for ruling the Earth, and we also get introduced to Stormgren who's the intermediary between Karellen and the human race, with the title of "Secretary". At first, I had made the connection of Vegas being Stormgren and Karellen (or the Overlords in general) being Gun, because Stormgren trusts Karellen with ruling the human race, just as Vegas idolizes his father who can totally bring prosperity to the family and make it better by force (an important element since the Overlords just came and declared themselves the rulers of the planet and took over). Also, there's an element of secrecy with Karellen, because it's been 5 years since he arrived on Earth but no one, not even Stormgren, knows what he looks like. This causes Stormgren to be a bit suspicious of Karellen, which he rarely shows and tries to push the feeling down when it resurfaces. In the same way, I thought this could connect to Gun who's hiding stuff from Vegas - Porsche anyone? - which Vegas will start having thoughts about post ep 11. All of that is fine and good, BUT I wouldn't be a Pete girlie if I didn't try to include my boy in this. I think all of the above I mentioned is more about Pete than Vegas. And, judging by how obsessed Vegas became with Pete post ep 10 - after their masks fell off and he saw who Pete truly was - I am confident in my belief that Vegas reading Childhood's End would think of Pete, not himself (sth he already does at this point but you get what I'm saying). SO, Stormgren is actually Pete, who follows Karellen's words almost blindly, and almost is an important word here because in the book, he does argue back about things and is vocal about his opinions, even if Karellen smartly turns them down. Karellen is generally very softly spoken, polite and very human like in the way he talks, so in my opinion he resembles Korn way more than Gun. There's also a character who calls Stormgren out on his blind faith in Karellen, and if this isn't Vegas telling Pete that "there's no such thing as honesty", I don't know what it is. Now, for the fun part: Stormgren gets kidnapped by a group of humans who want the Overlords to leave and not only is the dude semi-casual about it on the surface while keeping his panic under wraps, in the end his captors, after explaining how they got him and what their plan is, throw a pack of cards at him and ask him to play poker with him, which causes Stormgren to laugh like he hasn't laughed in years. I'm just imagining Vegas reading this and shaking his head, putting on his clown shoes, thinking: these guys are so stupid, encouraging their captive be this nonchalant around them, I would never.

[xneontragedyx]

Accepting going ghost accepting no contact. Yeah I can honestly say I'm weak, I can't do that, I don't have anger in me anymore even though he did me really bad, I still seek validation and worthiness but he just calls me a clown with nothing to offer.

We were together living together for 2 years I've known him since 2013 he pretty much was telling everybody behind my back that I'm a dumb b**** and I am unattractive and I have a weird shaped body and I don't dress like a girl and that I'm blind and we don't have the same personality so there's no way like he can get close to me and he said I cared for you a lot which probably means he thinks that he took care of me but I was working 14 hours a day cuz I had two jobs and I was running on 5 hours of sleep and I did that for almost 2 years and he actually had romantic feelings and less full feelings for this girl Maria that he kept secret and she would show up at the apartment after he would take my daughter to school she would show up and she'd be there until like 3:00 or whatever in the apartment so he even called her attendant that he wished that like him and her like live together you know but I was the Cash cow you needed me to pay but he wanted to spend time with her and that's what he told her he's like I'm not even affection I don't even tell that girl I love her it's just true you never told me he loved me and it wasn't affectionate so yeah he pretty much was like romantic with this girl and told her you love her and said like she was his OPP or whatever like his his special person and that they were so close and that he called her beautiful like not only did he admire her body but he admires her personality and he cares for her like like okay yeah anyways he says that she's angelic and she can fly and she's a good mom like he has like so much positive things to say about this girl and like nothing but s*** talking about me because he's always comparing me to her even though I was the one but see my ass off trying to like make sure that I was putting in my part but he pretty much said that like I couldn't give him what he needed because he called me boring because I wasn't sexually satisfying him so he literally I know of three people he had with Marcy with Jezebel and with Maria I don't know who else but yeah it was consistent it wasn't like a one-time thing. he called me a cop I don't know what that means but yeah he called me a cop he called me a dog he called me desperate and he said to move on there's nothing there I keep looking for something to be there he's already moved on and that he never saw me as long term anyways he saw me a short-term because he never had those real feelings for me in the first place you never saw a future he just needed to get out of his mom's house and I was the one that was able to do that because I'm not gullible and they actually laugh behind my back because I thought that like everything was fine but it wasn't. He left me for her he actually is engaged to her or was engaged to her they actually went to Vegas to get married apparently they had a huge blowout and he said that I traumatized him because I when I found out he was cheating on me and he didn't care for me I guess I spiraled into an emotional roller coaster and he said that traumatized him like a lot and now he doesn't want to live with another woman anymore or like do that anymore and he puts the blame on me like he said out of all the memories that he's ever had like you know when you part ways with somebody he's like you or a bad memory I do not like to think about you at all he's like I still have resentments. He blocked me on everything he blocked me on everything for real. And people are like your wounded you need to heal and you need to move on you need to move forward in your life and stop dwelling on the past like it's been long enough and why would you want someone that doesn't want you like he doesn't want you why would you stay put and I don't know how to I don't know how to move forward from the pain. not to mention you got me pregnant and was like totally fine with me keeping the kid. And he proposed to me twice once without a ring and then once with a ring. And the thing is too is I think he was being romantic with me just to make fun of me behind my back with his actual friends.

[bachelorbro-blog1]

Season 13, Episode 1 (The One Where Blake K Doesn't Get a Rose)

Welcome back, Bachelor Nation! I’m super excited about this season of the Bachelorette (mostly because Rachel is not Nick Viall and will never be Nick Viall). You all know how I feel about Rachel (and that I knew she’d be the next Bachelorette since the first episode of last season), so I won’t wax poetic about her. Instead, I’ll just start this recap. Let’s go!

The episode opens with Chris Harrison talking about how much we all love Rachel. Duh. Obviously. Let’s move on. 

Rachel does some street dancing, plays basketball alone, “goes to court” (by which I mean she performs in an instructional video about what lawyers do as directed by someone who doesn't know any lawyers), flashes back to meeting gross Nick (complete with beignet eating and limo crying), takes a plane with her DOG WHOSE NAME IS COPPER (!!!), poses for some pictures, chats with some grandmas, and finally drives up to the mansion. 

Time to meet some guys! 

Pretty Boy Pitbull Kenny King is a wrestler. He is very sweaty and panty for a solid chunk of his intro video and has a very tall ten year old daughter. (Is Rachel ready to get engaged to a man who has a ten year old child and possibly be that child’s step mother?). He makes a pun about rings.

Jack Stone is a lawyer (like Rachel), is 31 (like Rachel), and is from Dallas (like Rachel). He talks about the passing of his mother while staring out at some water and then plays with a dog. 

Alex would like to let you all know that is not a meat head. He likes books and coding and learning and Rubiks Cubes. Ok? Those are things meat heads don't like! Only nerds like those things!

Mohit is a start-up guy. He loves dancing with his family in his living room. 

Alright. Here he fucking is. Whaboom -- a manboy named Lucas who frequently wears shirts that have cartoon versions of his own face on them. This guy is going to be either my most favorite or my least favorite.

Blake E (omega Blake) is a sports nutritionist and certified lunatic. He works out on the beach and talks about how amazing his penis is (by which he means it’s slightly below average). Fuck this guy.

Next up is Diggy, who loves clothes and has 575 pairs of shoes (or 1150 individual shoes). Diggy, you see, is a fashionista. He also has a dog, but we don't get to know how many pairs of shoes the dog owns. 

Josiah makes me cry. Top 5, easily. E A S I L Y . His older brother killed himself when he was younger and Josiah had to cut him down from the tree that he hung himself on. Josiah has an amazing story and is either this season’s winner or next season's Bachelor. 

A meeting of the minds commences. Among Rachel’s panel of advisors is Astrid (who I forgot about), Whitney (who everyone forgot about), nanny-having Corinne, dolphin lady Alexis, Raven (the true winner of Nick Viall’s season of The Bachelor), beautiful princess Kristina, and Jasmine G. (the one who choked Nick -- big fan). Everyone loves Eric, Raven believes that DeMario is amazing (but Whitney thinks he’s THERE FOR THE WRONG REASONS™️), and some ill-advised voice likes Dean (the one who made the “I’m ready to go black and I’m never going back” comment). 

Time for the men to come out of the limo. Finally.

First out of the limo is Peter. He is wearing a nice jacket and doesn't say anything awful. Congratulations, Peter!

Next is Josiah, this season’s winner. He makes a lawyer joke. Smells like a wedding to me!

Out comes chiropractor Bryan. He speaks Spanish and looks like a much more attractive version of my neighbor. 

Kenny calls her “Pretty Rachel” and then dances with her. I am overcome with grief. 

Rob doesn't get much of an introduction, but who cares?

There is also a man named Iggy. Diggy and Iggy. Fine.

Bryce, the transphobic firefighter, lifts Rachel off of her feet. Get out, Bryce.

Next out of the limo is Steve Urkel, followed by Stefan Urquelle. His real name is Will. As in when Will this end?

Here comes Diggy, who loves The Devil Wears Prada. He makes a pun based off of his name. 

Kyle shows Rachel his buns. Who is Kyle?

Blake K (alpha Blake) talks about his grandparents who recently celebrated their 65th wedding anniversary. Big fan of Blake K. Huge.

Brady shows up with a sledge hammer. He is immediately terrifying. He “breaks the ice” at which point I feel he should be lead away from Rachel with his hands behind his back. He is also possibly wearing lavender lipstick. 

Dean, who made that cringe-worthy comment when he first met Rachel, is shaking and grinning. Rachel lies about loving the comment. This is your season, Rachel. You do not have to lie to anyone.

Here comes Eric, my first round draft pick. Now I find him boring. 

DeMario, who brought plane tickets to Vegas to his first encounter with Rachel, looks forward to more “first moments” with her. His confidence is overwhelming. 

Gross Blake E arrives with a marching band. Do less, Blake E. I implore you. (Side note: Blake E’s hair is straight up disgusting).

Let’s make misogynistic comments about Rachel! A smart and funny woman? How is that possible? No woman has ever been smart AND funny! There must be some sort of catch! Several men’s heads explode. 

Fred, who knew Rachel in elementary school, brings a yearbook. Rachel remembers his bad behavior. I sincerely hope he becomes this season’s Liz the Doula. (Miss you, Liz!)

Jonathan, the tickle monster, makes me scream into a pillow. If anyone ever tried to tickle me upon meeting me I would actually knock them out. Not appropriate, creepy Jonathan. 

Lee, whose guitar lets me know it’s alright to hate him, wastes no time in introducing himself as a monster. He is a self-proclaimed singer/songwriter, and a me-proclaimed douchebag.

Alex the Mensa genius brings a vacuum because why not?

Milton, who literally admitted that he wanted to be discovered by a talent agent, takes a selfie with Rachel. Bye!

Adam brings a mannequin named Adam Jr. Adam Jr. (AJ) will more than likely compete on Bachelor in Paradise because Rachel hates him. AJ is left in the corner where he conspires against all of the other men in the house whilst Jonathan tickles people. 

Matt is a penguin. Can’t wait until Alexis decks him on Paradise. 

Grant arrives in an ambulance. 

Anthony is wearing a beige suit. Different!

Jamey is unsavory upon first sight and unsavory upon further inspection.

Jack Stone has a great (crocodile) smile. Maybe he uses it to bite people. 

Mohit makes some kind of comment about her having the upper hand. Is he a dom? A misogynist? Both? Neither? Where are his dancing family members?

A man whose legal name is Jedidiah quotes a Bible verse about crying. He is not wearing a full suit. 

Michael brings a brownie. I pick him.

The men wonder who will go crazy. Here’s Whaboom. He is contractually obligated to show up when someone says “crazy,” “maniac,” “Whaboom,” or “testicles.” He turns bright red while yelling and carries a megaphone. Can't wait until he’s full drunk.

All 31 men (and 1 mannequin) are now in the mansion. Time for Rachel to like actually kind of meet them, but not really because chances are they’ll speak with her for like 10 minutes each and continuously steal her from each other. 

Josiah tells Rachel his story, but she's only kind of buying what he's selling. It’s ok. They just need time to fall in love.

Dean and Rachel build a sand castle together. Dean, the youngest man in the mansion, thinks this is cute. Rachel is his babysitter.

Rob brought a baseball card with Rachel on it. 

Anthony would like to understand Rachel.

Eric and Rachel dance again, but the spark is gone. 

Someone gave AJ a glass of champagne. He is a child! He cannot drink! 

Matt the Penguin asks if Rachel prefers Michael Jackson or Prince while AJ (who, like a clown, is hilarious and terrifying) (mostly terrifying) professes his love for Rachel in French.

Rachel remembered Fred the moment she saw him. He’s the top 5 guy who makes her feel comfortable, connected to her past, but he won't win. 

Bryan steals Rachel. He is mature and handsome and surely top 5 material. His confidence, unlike DeMario’s, is endearing because it’s over-the-top in a funny way. You can tell he doesn't really believe all of these things about himself. (I hope). Rachel and Bryan kiss. She didn’t want to kiss anyone tonight, but says that she enjoyed him. 

The first impression rose is brought out. Everyone starts sweating (and drinking). Let’s be honest. Bryan is getting the rose. No one else spent that kind of time with Rachel. And, as a first impression rose winner herself, she knows who’s real and who’s fake. 

DeMario talks a lot, according to Josiah. Rachel is impressed by his confidence. 

Jamey mentioned that his suit cost $2,000. He is Gob Bluth and I was right to hate him.

Men swarm Rachel. She is starting to get nervous. Cancel the season! Send everyone home! Let Rachel have fun in the mansion by herself. 

Mohit is drunk and can't seem to find the right way to steal Rachel. 

Rachel tells Peter that she doesn’t like chocolate while Whaboom narrates through a megaphone. 

Blake E hates Whaboom so I officially love Whaboom. I would very much like to see Whaboom deck Blake E. I would very much like to see anyone (especially Rachel) deck Blake E.

None of these men seem to realize that they can only have a few minutes with Rachel. There are 31 of you and her time is more valuable than all of yours combined. Get with the picture. 

I also just realized that Alex brought a vacuum because when we first met Rachel during Nick’s season she danced with a vacuum. Fine.

“Cash me outside, how bow dah?” asks Josiah. Oh, Josiah. I was rooting for you. 

Kenny brings up his daughter -- his favorite person in the whole world. Maybe I was wrong to judge him. He’s a good father. 

The first impression rose goes to Bryan because duh. Mohit gasps. He is the DGAP.

it’s finally time for the first rose ceremony!

Roses go to: 

- Normal Peter

- Will Urkel

- Smiley Jack Stone

- Slimy Jamey

- Forgettable Iggy

- Dance Machine Eric

- Confident DeMario

- Jonathan the Creep

- Transphobic Bryce

- Alex the Mega Genius

- Kenny the Wrestling Dad

- Baby Dean

- Matt the Penguin

- Anthony (and his eyebrows)

- Brady the Lip Gloss Aficionado

- Josiah the Future Winner 

- Hatable Lee

- Fashion-forward Diggy

- Fred from Camp

- Adam (but not Adam Jr, which is rude)

- Blake E who is more than likely sticky 

and last, but certainly not least

- Whaboom (because this is reality television)

Roses do not go to:

- Bland Rob

- Drunk Mohit

- Forgettable Kyle 

- Blake K (who actually voluntarily left to see his grandfather in the ICU -- i.e. the true winner of this season)

- Grant, who was not on this episode

- Bible-quoting Jedidiah

- Milton, who will never get the chance to be famous now (FIRST CRY OF THE SEASON)

and

- Brownie-bringing Michael

Alright, the season has begun. Who will win? Who will lose? Who will beat the crap out of Blake E? Here’s to finding out!