#How To Save Marriages

[platoapproved]

[inheroes--wetrust]

cannot get over how down bad lestat is for louis even thirty years later. louis babe the book plot is so unnecessary! you could have gotten him back with a fire emoji reply to his instagram story. you could have vague-tweeted "missing you..." and he'd be in your DMs instantly. you could have send a "u up?" text to him halfway across the world and lestat would be banging down your door five seconds later!

[sunderwight]

Thinking about Black Widow Luo Binghe.

Hear me out -- so just like in canon, Shen Qingqiu self-destructs to save Luo Binghe, dies, and Luo Binghe steals his body to put on ice while he looks for methods to resurrect him. But unlike in canon, staving off decomposition is simply not that doable for a matter of years, even with cultivation and Luo Binghe pouring qi into the process. The qi costs are still high, so is Xin Mo, and now Binghe also needs a special artifact that can actually preserve Shen Qingqiu, but that runs on blood sacrifices.

To get the thing working, Luo Binghe feeds it a bunch of prisoners from the Water Prison. Then he starts kidnapping cultivators to drain for his own qi reserves, but that's difficult, controversial, and he can't use the same victims for the blood sacrifice afterwards. Frankly, between one thing and another it would be easier to satisfy Xin Mo with dual cultivation, and focus on finding victims for Shizun's Snow White style glass preservation coffin without having to choose between using targets for one or the other. Especially given that, if he finesses it, Luo Binghe can extend the use of his sacrifices and get more out of them with fewer deaths that way.

He's pretty sure that Shizun would want fewer deaths.

Of course, he is not a fan of the logistics of the plan itself, but he'd do worse things to one day be reunited. He consoles himself that he's building up bedroom experience for one day being with Shen Qingqiu, and that it doesn't really count because his heart's not really in it, and also if Shizun got to spend all that time in brothels then it's only fitting that Luo Binghe be his equal in this as well. It still doesn't make it pleasant for him, but it makes him able to tolerate the necessity of it.

So Luo Binghe ends up marrying a string of rich and powerful figures -- mostly the villainous single fathers and mothers and evil uncles of harem members from PIDW, rather than their daughters -- and coming up with creative ways of making all their deaths a few months into the process look like accidents. After the third one people are undeniably wary of marrying him, but there's always someone with a big enough ego to think they'll be an exception, or stupid enough to believe that it really has just been so much bad luck up to that point. It helps that the universe is predisposed to let him hit it.

When SY wakes up in the shroom body and hears about Luo Binghe's succession of marriages, he's not surprised. What he is surprised by is the bisexual graveyard of toxic dilfs and milfs that has replaced the harem.

What did he do to cause that?!

And what does Luo Binghe mean that he wants to marry his own shizun now? Is this his new method of revenge??? Binghe, you don't have to marry someone to kill them!

[lialox]

"No one worries about Han Sooyoung"

I have a character analysis cooking. (It's doksoo of course)

There's a quote somewhere in the novel about HSY saying "You're lucky Kim Dokja, you have people who worry about you".

Which implies that:

She really wanted people who cared about her growing up.

"but she had friends?" ya and none of them cared about her. That's worse than being alone imo

Obviously her family didn't care abt her and I don't think her staff did either

Being cared for is one of her secret deep dark wants and needs

Which is crazier because the next four chapters after this quote is Kim Dokja constantly worrying and thinking about her even though he's like, supposed to be dead. (I have the quotes saved somewhere ok) It goes like:

"Shit, I need to write something, I wish HSY was here."

Wtf ABFD is pretending to be a fifteen year old? Man her sponsor is low key a predator, is she ok??

How is she doing?

JAng HAYOUNG. You said HSY is in a crisis?? Tell me quickly!!

...its gonna be a proper story on AO3 one day ok I swear

Edit: I forgot to add the part where he stop drops and rolls to send her a message, like some kind of anxious boyfriend whose phone died and he hasn't texted his short tempered girlfriend

[fendeavor]

Mine

Thank you to @jrooc and @galladrabbles for this one! I went through a lot of reiterations of 'mine' before I settled on this one, I love a diverse prompt!

---

Mickey has this awful devious grin on his face as he returns from the toilets, weaving through the crowd of done-up diners.

“You’re not gonna believe what some rich fucker dropped,” he whispers, flashing his pilfered item at Ian.

Mickey must not notice Ian’s rapidly paling complexion and his sudden compulsion to paw at his pockets, because he rolls the velvet ring box in his hands and keeps on talking.

“I looked, it’s fuckin’ nice. I’d sure as hell say yes.” “Would you?” Ian blurts before he can stop himself. “What?” “It’s mine, Mick. Yours, if you still say yes.”

[violettierre]

My haitani father Shio headcanon is just a bit too funny cuz of how well it works that it sounds like a waste of perfect canon idea and crossover for both of wakui's works.

Aside from the obvious physical features very very obvious, identical eyes, nose, blonde eyebrows, rindou's face form, ran's hair color palette and (arguably) bonten hair style, blah blah i mean just look a the pictures below, you can also bring up any fact from either manga and add it to the hc and it fits in just SO WELL, i'll give the first example, The Haitanis are very obviously rich spoiled kids like have you seen their apartment? They have a fucking dj set, only rich kids with neglective powerful parents will have no problem paying for that, just saying, and even though i love him let's be real Shio is the type to be that parent, i mean cmon he's rich like crazy rich (filthy yakuza money yum yum) he tots would give his children WAY more than enough allowance so they can leave him alone, also the way they act, i've always the Haitanis were the type of kids that think they own the school cuz their dad is rich .

Nvm if this never becomes canon or both universes don't collide, it's just so entertaining to keep connecting the dots that were likely never there, like how Rindou is a heavy drinker cuz his father drank alot with the rest of the Yotsurugis and he tried to imitate him from a young age that it became an unhealthy habit or if you want to add more drama he only drinks cuz he looks up to his father but Shio favors Ran cuz he can posssibly succeed him (canon power complex) so Rindou resorted to drinking cuz it's the only thing like his dad that he can do. Heck yeah i made it angsty!!!

You can also add great context to his fear of Yakuza, picture this, when he was a kid he got up in the middle of night after hearing a loud noise to search for his parents and witnessed Shio (canon Yakuza) pew pew-ing some poeple and surrounded with scary men, that probably scarred him for life that he was so terrified when Kakucho got them interfering with some, OH OH something just came to mind, if he's the son of a yakuza yeah he didn't wanna clash with other yakuza families cuz it can end in a blood shed and risk his and his family's lives.

And i'm gonna add this one not very small detail and i swear i'll shut up (for now), i know it's just a stupid headcanon that is very far from becoming reality and i don't have to take it this deep but hear me out, why their last name is Haitani and not Yotsurugi like their dad, Shio is powerful and have many enemies right ? So he simply decided to protect his children and their identity by giving them another last name likely their mother's (yk like minato with naruto style plan ?) So Haitani is actually their mom's family name. I rest my case. Thank you for coming to my useless ted talk.

[meidui]

2012!stevetony + that don't impress me much

[puppyeared]

Was nobody gonna warn me that I would fall a little bit in love with every character in Stardew

[fumifooms]

Marcille and Chikchuck? I love your Not Being Normal About Your Coworker pride shirt!

Must get to know him better must collect info on him and write self-insert fanfic like he’s blorbo from my shows vs must tease 24/7 because she’s so honors student but she gets all huffy puffy when you jab at her and it’s the only damn entertainment I have down here at my job also I gotta make sure she’s safe even though she’s an explosion expert I gotta pull her away from danger because she’s clumsy yes yes. And then the way they get frustrated at each other but still stay glued at the hips, the duality lmfaoo. "You should be more open" but wait to her not Senshi… "Leave me alone" but then he goes out of his way to tease her playfully any opportunity he gets… Ahhh coworkers to friends I love you

[queer-ragnelle]

This cold-blooded pride in me Won't go down quietly And I'm standing right where I said I could never be —Madison Cunningham

[countess-of-edessa]

new hot take is that "i don’t need anyone but God" is pretty much wrong and we should stop telling people they can’t get married/have children/etc before they believe this fully. unless you have the spiritual fortitude of a hermit it is untrue. obviously God is perfection in which no lack can be found but we are not in His full presence by virtue of being on earth! if we were then we would be in heaven but we are not! in the meantime, the experience of God we have on earth necessarily includes other people whether they be friends or spouses or children. if that was not true God would not have said "It is not good for man to be alone" and given him a companion even though God himself was interacting with Adam! in this current state of separation from God as it exists on this earth, very few people can really be without all other people and rely only on contemplation and prayer. obviously God is enough and will always be enough, but our perception of Him in this fallen world is seriously lacking if we cannot experience His love through the experience of loving and being loved by others.

[crimmsonflower]

shoutout to the writer of my favourite lawlight fic to ever exist

killing my self because I forgot to save it and they deleted the fic

[ladyluscinia]

Shout out to whoever said one of Shiv's visceral, emotional reasons was that Tom would never be able to take the moral high ground in their relationship again. Because exactly!

Shiv still might be fucked in the business sense because Tom is a puppet and Matsson doesn't respect her, but in terms of her marriage... She still wants him even after the worst things have been said, and the "worst thing" he was most upset by was that she repeatedly left him out to dry in pursuit of her own power. Well, now it doesn't matter how valid his complaints were! He can never make that particular point again without the most loaded silence of his life! And on top of that, he's added another betrayal of her. That new imbalance more than anything is what will derail the divorce, and make it so she's NOT meekly coming home and begging him to let her stay as his housewife or whatever.

Business power is still up in the air, but she's taken a huge amount of private power back. It was an emotional move driven more by hurt than logic, but she's still done it!

And I do appreciate the TomGreg parallel here, too, because Greg has always been Tom's solution to feeling like Shiv was above him. His own personal Roy to lord over. Their friction was coming from Greg growing an ego around the Roy name and trying to leverage himself out from under Tom's thumb. Well, now he's fucked it! It's not Royco anymore! Greg doesn't have Matsson's backing, his name is worthless, and he overplayed himself into a certain death situation. And then here's Tom, letting him stay despite the betrayal but only because Tom bought him.

Tom got the crown, Shiv got the marital upper hand to help her deal with that, and Tom got Greg to help him deal with that.

They are so fucking dysfunctional but maybe TomShiv can make this work 😘

[44ratsinatrenchcoat]

Louis: Lestat, I'm leaving you Lestat: But Louis Lestat, thinking: Oh shit, Lestat, he's about to leave you, think of something, think of something, think of- Lestat: I'm pregnant

[throwawayasoiafaccount]

god tywin lannister deserved worse

just remembering elias death and i wanna puke and the way tywin talks about elia and what happened is so damn gross

but rip tommen and myrcella we all know what’s about to happen in the next book :/

the cycle of violence just keeps spinning and damn you tywin for beginning it

(i got a bit crazy in the tags 💀)

[razzle-zazzle]

wait what's the betrothal au??

I'm glad you asked! The premise of the Betrothal AU, in a single sentence, is thus:

Cole and Skylor are arranged to marry each other by a contract made before either of them were born, and they take issue with this.

Of course, there's more to the AU than just the premise—how the whole contract was made and how Skylor and Cole feel about it are major questions I wanna explore in the AU, so I'll do my best to summarize them a bit here:

The contract was made by Chen and Cole's Currently Unnamed Grandfather (I used to call him Shane but I'm not liking that name as much now tbh); Chen had the upper hand in those negotiations. Like it was clear from start to finish who was in control. He initially asked for Lilly's hand, but her father threw a fit and managed to change the terms to "Chen's child will marry Lilly's youngest child by the time both are 20" (but with. more legalese). Because surely, Unnamed Grandfather thought, Chen couldn't possibly have children as an exiled-to-an-island war criminal, and surely, if Chen did find a way to father offspring, Lilly would have multiple children and her eldest would inherit the power of earth, thus preventing the earth master line from getting tangled up with the likes of Chen.

Except then about six months after Skylor was born Chen sent several baby pictures to Unnamed Grandfather to gloat. And Lilly only had Cole because she and Lou only ever wanted one child. So Cole and Skylor are engaged from... not quite birth because Skylor was born almost a year earlier and Chen waited to see if Lilly would have any other children, but definitely since they were both young enough to toddle.

Sooooo... how do Skylor and Cole feel about this? Well, for the most part.. they're kids. Yeah, they meet when they're both five and they're given their halves of a pendant and told that one day they're gonna marry each other, but at that point they were literally just children. Marriage was more of a concept to them, a silly thing they could pretend to do and think about that otherwise didn't really impact them. Especially since they only saw each other once a year (and Lou & Lilly would always throw a fit when Unnamed Grandfather took Cole to Chen's island. But Unnamed Grandfather is going to honor his debts, dammit, even the ones that suck).

But even as they did get to be kids, even as Skylor would eagerly await the 2-4 weeks every year when Unnamed Grandfather would visit with Cole in tow, even as they would run around the labyrinth and into the jungle and all over Chen's compound like the kids they were... well, Chen's a dick. Oh, sure, he wasn't trying to make them feel bad about the engagement, but he definitely wouldn't let them forget it.

So the marriage became a sort of inevitability, for Cole & Skylor. When they were 11-12, they had these cute puppy crushes on each other that they would not have had were it not for the whole "you two are going to one day marry and then spend the rest of your life together" thing hanging over their heads.

And then Unnamed Grandfather dies, and Lilly's fallen ill, and Lou is absolutely not going to go to Chen's island under any circumstances. So Cole and Skylor haven't seen each other in person since they were 13, and wrote letters instead.

So they inevitably drifted. For Skylor, the marriage was an inevitability, but one that she could deal with later—being Chen's daughter gives her way more pressing concerns to deal with daily, anyway. And it was the same for Cole—the engagement, when he thought about it (which wasn't super often) was a distant sort of inevitability, like a project due at the end of the semester that you don't think about until then because you've got assignments due now to worry about.

When Chen invites the ninja to his tournament, when Cole and Skylor see each other on that ferry...

Skylor had been sort of vaguely aware that she wasn't interested in Cole that way. From her memory, he was sweet and rowdy, and her only childhood friend her age. Not the worst person to be tied to on the legal level of marriage, but not exactly someone she was interested in. Seeing Cole in person for the first time in years, and connecting that familiar face with the most recent letters—it crystalizes, for Skylor, that she's not into him that way.

But her father always gets what he wants, and the contract is airtight. So Skylor grits her teeth, swallows her venom, and sidles over to Cole to test the waters. Hope he's not as into her as she remembers feeling about him once, when they were younger and friendlier and liked to talk about what they wanted for their wedding together while digging in the mud for cool jungle bugs.

Cole hadn't thought about his engagement as often—sure, he used the new pendant half that Chen sent him after the monastery burned down to finance every meal the grieving ninja ate at Chen's, and sure, he sent letters monthly at least. But the notion of marriage has become so distant and unimportant in the wake of Garmadon, the Great Devourer, the Overlord, and Zane's death. When he sees Skylor, standing off to the side in a cloak but nonetheless recognizable, it hits him—they really hadn't seen each other in years, and he doesn't feel anything romantic for her.

But Chen has Zane, or might have Zane and be lying—and Cole can't chance that. He needs to know for sure if Zane is alive, so he hopped on the ferry alongside the others, pendant half in hand in case it'd come in handy. But now that the reality of his engagement is staring him in the face and sidling over to him—oh, Cole just knows it's going to cause problems. He's always been good at running away from problems—but he can't run away now, can he?

so yeah tl;dr chen's a little bitch and cole & skylor are gonna have to try and work around that