#I don't call myself one because my primary activism is in educational and the two feminist organisations I regularly assist dont have a

[exausta-verytired]

are you a radical feminist? fail proof test!

1. are you part of a women's organisation that has its direct action primarily based on radical feminist theory?

2. are you an academic researcher/writer in the field of radical feminism?

If you answered yes to one or both, you're a radfem. If your answer to both is negative, you're not. The end

[readychilledwine]

About CoParents:

Warning- Long post, and my thoughts are a little jumbled

I got accused of racism today over my Co Parents drabble featuring Eris and Cassian. I was also accused of alienating Cassian from his daughter, forcing her to grow up in a place known for racism and prejudice, ect.

And I just need to talk about it.

To address the alienation- I based the relationship between Cassian, Eris, and babygirl off of one I see in my everyday life between my partner's brother, his daughter, her momma and her significant other.

In my real life- Momma has primary custody of their daughter, and she has been with her significant other since their daughter was about 7 months old. She is 4 and views both of them as daddy. She gets sad when she leaves her "home dad" and mom. But that sadness is quickly gone as soon as she is with bio daddy (partner's brother.)

I based the communications and exchange on what I've watched between the two men in my life. The babygirl in my life is happy, healthy, loves both of her daddies equally, but like all Littles who have adult feelings, but do not know how to express them, she gets a little sad because she knows she'll miss mom and dad, even if she's super excited to also see biodaddy, and she cries leaving biodaddy to go back home. We've ALL worked our asses off ensuring she has healthy home lives, support from all of us, and she knows how loved, wanted, and supported she is (and she does.) I do not see a few little tears during an exchange as a sign of alienating a parent.

I also tried to make it clear she sees Cassian. The updates Eris gave him are SMALL. (She likes hot chocolate before bed now. Potty issues a lot of littles struggle with.) Eris calls Cassian her dad, which is NOT something people alienating a parent does. Eris told Cassian he had no doubts Cassian would take good care of her over the next 2 weeks, which is a sign of Eris supporting Cassian as a father. I had planned on doing the exchange back with Cassian in Autumn, returning babygirl to the reader, and meeting the babe.

But now we head into the racism part.

Being accused of being racist is a lingering ick, and I can't shake it.

I am active in organizations that work with BIPOC on educating people on racism, discrimination, and privilege. I work with law enforcement, medical, and fire teams regarding race sensitivity education. I am the dispatcher who also handles empathy training in our department. I pride myself on being sensitive, empathic, and educated on signs of racism and microaggressions.

I want to apologize if Co Parents came off that way to someone else, though. I want to apologize to anyone who may have been offended. It was not my intent at all as the writer, and genuinely, if I hurt you, I am sorry.

I'm debating on deleting Co Parents and being done with writing acotar characters as parents, especially in Coparenting situations and blended houses. I never want to feel as icky as I do right now, I will not be writing a follow-up to it if it does stay up, and I'm going to be done with the dynamic to prevent this from happening again.

I do also want to add-

I am fine with discussing and taking criticism for my writing. If it turns into a debate, though, and "let's agree to disagree," has been said by both of us, but it still turns into more digging and backhanded attacks, I make no promises I won't block you.. I want my blog to be a safe haven for myself and my followers. I won't allow someone to attack any of you or me here. I don't appreciate that at all. I was going to allow the comments to sit, but there's a line, and I felt it was crossed in this situation.

I don't know, friends. Feeling pretty icky.

[hellomynameisbisexual]

Dr. Lauren Beach was 14 years old when she/they first came out as bisexual. Beach revealed the truth to friends and curious classmates at her/their suburban Michigan high school. The reactions varied, but not many were affirming.

"I experienced a lot of people who eroticized my attraction to femme people. It's like, 'oh, you're bi. That's so hot,'" says Beach, who has a Ph.D. in molecular, cellular, developmental biology and genetics.

Other friends asked Beach if she/they were doing it for attention. Beach says only three people, including Beach, at her/their school were openly out as queer. Instead of being embraced by them, Beach received flak for her/their sexuality.

"One of the other people there who was queer was like, 'You're a fence sitter! You're a switcher. You can't be trusted, you might date men after dating me," recalls Beach.

This kind of biphobia, which perpetuates stereotypes, hatred, and prejudices about bisexual people, is not uncommon — even (or sometimes especially) within the queer community. Stigma against bisexual people stems from a larger culture of homophobia, Rory Gory, digital marketing manager of the Trevor Project, an LGBTQ youth suicide prevention and crisis intervention organization, wrote in an email to Mashable.

"Since bisexuals often move between straight and queer spaces, they are subjected to both homophobia and biphobia," Gory explains.

Bisexual people make up a sizable population within the LGBTQ community, given more than 50 percent of queer people in America identify as bisexual, according to the Williams Institute. The think tank does research on sexual orientation and gender identity to ensure stereotypes don't influence laws, policies, and judicial decisions. To be clear, bisexuality means a person is attracted to more than one gender. It doesn't mean bisexual people are more sexually active than others or going through a phase (two common myths).

As a teenager, Beach bought into stereotypes about bi people. But now 22 years later, she/they are a professor at Northwestern University where she/they focus on the health of bisexual people and works to dispel myths about them. Additionally, Beach co-founded the Chicago Bisexual Health Task Force, a coalition that advances the heath equity of bisexual people.

Mashable spoke with Beach, and representatives from advocacy organizations such as the Human Rights Campaign (HRC), GLAAD, and the Trevor Project to learn about the unique challenges bisexual people face and how to be an ally.

1. View bisexual people as individuals

It's easy to lump a single group together but resist that trap. Like anyone else, bisexual people are individuals and their personalities and preferences vary. As Beach says, "there's not one single experience of bisexuality."

For example, Beach is asexual or ace. This means Beach doesn't experience sexual attraction, but she/they are romantically attracted to people across the gender spectrum. One can be both asexual and bi, with some asexual people preferring to identify as biromantic. Although many asexual people are not interested in having sex, some may choose to engage in sexual activity; asexual people can have varied preferences and experiences. Beach's experience doesn't mean all bisexual people feel the same way.

Getting to know more bisexual people can help scrub away your pre-conceived notions. You could already have friends who are bisexual and not know it. Be open about your intentions to learn so you can tear down your misconceptions about bisexual people, Beach recommends.

"You'd be surprised by how many people are like 'Oh, I'm actually bi. Let's talk," says Beach. "From understanding the breadth of experience, you personalize people."

2. Challenge negative stereotypes

As you expand your knowledge about bisexual people, speak up when you hear people perpetuating harmful misperceptions. Sometimes we don't even know we've absorbed negative stereotypes if we're not informed, says Mackenzie Hart, coordinator of GLAAD's Media Institute, which advises media, television, and film professionals on accurate LGBTQ representation.

An easy way to interject when you hear a myth about bisexual people is to say, "Actually, that's not true, my friend who is bisexual does not fit that stereotype," suggests Hart. It can also help to arm yourself with accurate statistics to further back up what you're saying, says Madeleine Roberts, HRC's assistant press secretary. HRC is a helpful resource for these stats.

"Barsexual" is a hurtful label often used to demean bisexual people. It refers to the incorrect belief that bisexual people will only interact with certain genders when they are intoxicated, explains Hart. It upholds the myth that bisexual women are actually straight as it implies they only flirt or make out with women when drunk. It also contributes to bi erasure, which GLAAD says happens when "the existence or legitimacy of bisexuality (either in general or in regard to an individual) is questioned or denied outright."

You should also push back against the harmful stereotypes that bisexuals can't be trusted to commit to a relationship, says Gory. "Embrace bisexuals as valid members of the [LGBTQ] community, rather than referring to them as 'allies' of the community."

Additionally, you can be an ally by understanding certain words and promoting proper usage. For example, you can clarify the difference between bisexual and bi+. Bi+ is an umbrella term inclusive of people who are pan, queer, fluid, and those who don't prefer labels. Use the full acronym of LGBTQ rather than gay as an umbrella term for queer people, explains Roberts. By taking these steps, you can "create spaces where people are hearing these words," says Hart.

3. Healthcare providers need to educate themselves

One time, a clinician asked Beach how many sex partners she/they had.

"I was like, OK, what do you mean by sex?" says Beach. The practitioner questioned why Beach would ask this. Beach told the clinician she/they are bisexual and, therefore, needed clarification about what sexual behavior she was referring to.

"She got really uncomfortable and said 'deep vaginal penetration,'" says Beach. "She started off guessing. She said, "you seem like a nice girl. So what is it, like one or two people?"" says Beach. The provider then said, “So, what you’re saying is more than 30 or 40 people.”

"It shows how someone [in a healthcare setting] can make this jump based on biphobic stereotypes of what my sexual behavior would be,” explains Beach.

After that encounter, Beach never went back to that doctor. To this day, Beach doesn’t have a designated primary care provider.

“I have to work up the emotional energy to want to go put myself through that potential experience," Beach says about seeking out healthcare.

Beach's experience isn't uncommon. Biphobia may discourage bisexual people from going to the doctor, with 39 percent of bisexual men and 33 percent of bisexual women reporting that they didn't disclose their sexual orientation to any medical provider, according to a 2012 study by the Williams Institute. Comparably, 13 percent of gay men and 10 percent of lesbians did not share their sexual orientation with a doctor.

Providers shouldn't presume anyone's sexual behavior because they know their sexual identity, says Beach. Hart echoes this advice. A doctor once asked Hart, "Are you seeing anyone?" Hart said no. She then asked, "If you were seeing anyone, would you be seeing a woman, a man, either, or other?" It wasn't perfect, Hart says, but asking open-ended questions that are inclusive of gender nonconforming people made Hart comfortable enough to see her again.

"Even if you aren't sure of certain words... you can make it clear you aren't going to be judgmental and you understand there's a wide array of experiences," says Hart.

4. Uplift bisexual people of color

Roberts recommends following prominent bi+ people of color on social media such as singer and actor Janelle Monáe, NFL player Ryan Russell, writer and transgender rights activist Raquel Willis, and politician Andrea Jenkins to become familiar with their lives. The next step is to share their stories with your friends and family.

At last year's Academy Awards, actor Rami Malek won Best Actor for his portrayal of British singer Freddie Mercury. Malek described Mercury as gay during his acceptance speech but Mercury was actually bisexual. Willis called out the bi erasure in a tweet.

Of the four people Roberts listed, two (Willis and Jenkins) are transgender. Just like one can be asexual and bi, one can also be transgender and bi. In 2015, the National Center for Transgender Equality surveyed 27,715 transgender people from every state and D.C., U.S. territories, and U.S. military bases abroad and 14 percent of respondents described their sexual orientation as bisexual.

To ensure you're not erasing transgender bi+ people's identities, always use inclusive language like "siblings" instead of "brothers and sisters," says Roberts, when addressing people as if they're family. This guarantees you're not assuming every bi+ person (or anyone generally) identifies as either male or female.

Taking into account the role intersectionality plays in the lives of bi+ people is important — especially when you're looking to amplify their voices.

[imanes]

do you think that "influencers" and celebs should speak out about "political issues"? (putting it in brackets bc. it's clearly an understatement n not accurate but idk how to word it) re: palestine? cause i've seen a lot of people be like "yeah they shouldn't talk about it if they're not educated or if they're just doing it for the trend" (even tho at this point its been so all over social media that ppl cant use the "im not educated enough" excuse anymore) n all and i guess it's a fair point and all but also? idk when i'm on social media and i see ppl talking about what's happening in palestine, and then i scroll down and see ppl be like omg new haul uwu! vlog with my friends! and thats just so???? idk. idk what to think bc on the other hand ofc performative activism is bad ykw? (like....re: blm ppl just posting a black square on their ig....) but i don't know what to think about it and i would love to hear your thoughts!!!

inchresting question to which i have no concrete answer to provide (except a lot of ramblings) because it is a thorny subject related to the ubiquity of digital society and the social weight we give to a certain class of people who frame their existence as something that could represent us but actually doesn't at all. and everybody and their mother - including me - has an opinion on it but at the end of the day it's just an opinion, not an empirical fact to be presented, and not even one i think about a lot bc it isn't a primary concern of mine on a day to day basis. so i'm like not looking for a debate with some random tumblr user (not talking about u anon, but talking about whoever might care too much about my inconsequential opinion) bc this is a question i'm answering, not a question i'm asking so to anyone tempted to "well according to the encyclopedia of pfppspfpsp" me, make ur own post!

i guess we can start with "should influencers/celebrities/people who are famous by virtue of being well-known even exist and should we lend weight to their words?" the answer to that may vary from person to person but social media accounts with a very large following can indeed turn tides with regard to socio-political crises, such as demonstrated by bella hadid who single-handedly educated a whole generation of south-korean netizens through her posts on palestine so we can see the good effects of that. now obviously bella hadid is personally concerned by the ethnic cleansing of palestine and has a lot more at stake than say rihanna with her all lives matter bullshit statement (someone said "saudi dick must be potent" but i think it has more to do with her contract with puma who is actually on the BDS list) or even jameela jamil who has a terminal case of "everything must be about me always".

people can say whatever they want about what well-known ppl are allowed to speak about or not but i'll just remind that these "influencers" and whatnot are people and they're bound to want to talk about stuff, especially when it is relevant or when prompted by their own following, because literally everybody with an account on a social media platform expresses their opinions about smt at one point or another in time. that includes random ppl on facebook commenting under news with their stale hot takes. famous ppl or "influencers" are no different.

I'll also say that "influence" only goes so far so I'm not *particulary* concerned with whatever whoever that i don't take seriously says. let me take the queen of talking out of her ass jameela jamil as a case study for this. people who agreed with her bizarre and narcissistic takes are already bound to agree with her because people flock to opinions that are similar to theirs. in my opinion that is not influence, that is attracting similar weirdos in your sphere and consequently creating impenetrable echo chambers of idiocy. did her stale ass take become a "consensus" amongst the indecisive? i don't know for sure bc i haven't run a survey but my assumption is that people who have critical thinking skills were rightfully put off by her rancid take and called her out publicly for it, providing sources and information, which i think is visible enough for anyone 2 look through. and people who like her talk and think out of their asses were like "wow preach i've been saying!" so they are themselves inconsequential.

so in my opinion it is less about influencing - because at this point i think someone can be influenced by a single person into buying a product but your fave singer is not going to make you buy into their ideology just because they released one lukewarm-at-best statement - and more about signaling where you stand. when viola davis and idris elba (amongst many others) stated that they stood by palestine, they made it clear that they stood against apartheid and ethnic cleansing and people who already agreed on these basic principles saluted their stance. do i believe they changed anybody's mind? not really, that is the job of well-informed people such as activists disseminating information and other people sharing the info. do i think that mark ruffalo lost all credibility with his flip-flopping? absolutely, and it doesn't reflect back on palestine, it reflects badly on HIM. we're in an era where people are bombarded with so much information from all sides that one person saying something is a drop in a bucket no matter how famous they are. this is also why we say that israhell lost the PR war. we were and are too loud 2 be ignored now and a few celebrities showcasing how inane they are doesn't change anything. the famous-ppl-market is too saturated for their opinion to matter a whoooole lot. support is appreciated but not hailed as the second-coming jesus u know what i mean?

to address ur final point about finding it weird that some people flat-out ignore some stuff while you are neck-deep into it, I think it's an understandable situation to find yourself in and as subhi taha said, it just looks tacky. i think it should be your cue to just unfollow whoever doesn't align with your interest content-wise. i unfollowed a loooot of people lately because of that like I really didn't give a fuck about Michelle phan's cryptocurrency peddling (which was already yikes on principle) in the midst of real-time live-stream decolonisation and liberation struggles against apartheid and ethnic cleansing, and at this point I don't think I can go back to caring about using social media for frivolous things (except cats and memes account bc they bring me joy) and following bigger accounts that are trying 2 sell me some shit, because I've changed in the past weeks, one could say I've become more "radical" (lol) and I'm ready to sustain an online space that caters to my concerns and abandon all content that I indeed find tacky in between two posts that talk about some serious shit. it's not to say I'll never post a pic of the sunset on Instagram again or that I don't consume content that has literally nothing to do with informing myself and disseminating information on decolonisation and anti-capitalism (I literally watch study vlogs from med students to unwind lol), or that "everybody should use their account in this specific way because it's the only one that is valid" (it's not and i don't care what other ppl do) but u are obviously dissatisfied with ur feed for valid reasons and while some ppl may not share your opinion it doesn't mean that you shouldn't take steps to make ur user experience less jarring.

it's again just an *opinion*, not a to-do list or smt that i'd ever want 2 present as a "fact", at the end of the day everybody curates their online spaces the way they want to and if you find your current configuration to be distasteful, that's understandable. and everybody is entitled to believe that celebrities/influencers/glorified sellers of products and lifestyles and disorders talking or not talking about certain things can be harmful or beneficial, as there are arguments and examples for and against it and i am personally not interested in participating the debate even tho i wrote a long ass text about it akjdlkfjgd I'm sorry about this u might be regretting ever asking me this question. hope i made sense!

[digitalmark18-blog]

Teen Social Media Use Is Skyrocketing. But Don't Panic, New Research Says

New Post has been published on https://britishdigitalmarketingnews.com/teen-social-media-use-is-skyrocketing-but-dont-panic-new-research-says/

Teen Social Media Use Is Skyrocketing. But Don't Panic, New Research Says

Teens’ use of social media has exploded over the past six years, while their preference for face-to-face interactions with friends has markedly declined.

But the sky does not appear to be falling, according to the results from a new national survey of teenagers by the nonprofit Common Sense Media. 

Surprisingly, the group found, teens on the whole say using social media makes them feel less lonely, less depressed, and more confident. They also say they’re aware of social media’s potential to distract and manipulate them, even if they sometimes struggle to moderate their own use.  

“It’s not all bad news,” said Common Sense senior research director Michael Robb.  “Teens’ social media lives defy any simplistic judgments.”

The new report, titled “Social Media, Social Life: Teens Reveal Their Experiences,” was released Monday. It’s the first update of a 2012 survey by the same name, creating a unique window through which to view the rapid, dramatic shifts in how teenagers communicate and relate to each other.

Among the most striking findings: 

70 percent of teens now say they use social media more than once a day, compared to 34 percent of teens in 2012. 

Snapchat is now the most popular social media platform among teens, with 41 percent saying it’s the one use most frequently.

35 percent of teens now say texting is their preferred mode of communication with friends, more than the 32 percent who prefer in-person communication. In 2012, 49 percent of teens preferred in-person communication.

One-fourth of teens say using social media makes them feel less lonely, compared to 3 percent who say it makes them feel more lonely.

Nearly three-fourths of teens believe tech companies manipulate them to get them to spend more time on their devices and platforms.

For K-12 educators and administrators, many of whom say they’re struggling to keep up with students’ social media use, the new survey results offer both solace and insight, Robb said.

While often highlighted, the experiences of young people who have had the most problems with social media do not appear to be reflective of teens as a whole, he said. And it’s increasingly evident that parents and educators have a clear role to play in helping teens learn to limit and mold their own social media use.

“The number one biggest thing is to understand your students’ social media lives,” Robb said. 

Facebook Supplanted by Snapchat, Instagram 

Back in 2012, Facebook dominated the landscape, and social media was something for teens to periodically check in on.

In 2018, though, “social media” is no longer a monolith. Teens now communicate, express themselves, share experiences and ideas, rant, gossip, flirt, plan, and stay on top of current events using a mix of platforms that compete ferociously for their attention.

The ephemeral-messaging service Snapchat is particularly popular, Common Sense found. Sixty-three percent of teens say they use Snapchat, and 41 percent say it’s the platform they use most frequently. 

Instagram, meanwhile, is used by 61 percent of teens.  

And Facebook’s decline among teens has been “precipitous,” according to the new report. Just 15 percent of teens now say Facebook is their main social media site, down from 68 percent six years ago. (Softening the blow: Facebook owns Instagram.)

All told, 81 percent of teens now use social media, and 70 percent use it more than once a day.

Nearly three-fourths check social media almost daily, Common Sense found, including 38 percent of teens who do so “constantly” or “a few times an hour.” More than one-third of teenagers post their own content to social media daily. Older teens and girls tend to be the heaviest social media users.

Because these new technologies have so quickly become integral to most teenagers’ lives, Robb said, it can be easy for adults to focus on what is being displaced. 

That’s not entirely misguided—teens’ declining preference for in-person communication is particularly worth noting, he said.

One question to conside, Robb said, is if that trend reflects a vicious cycle in which the quality of the face-to-face time teens do have is diminished because their friends are more interested in their phones than in each other. The survey data suggest that could be the case: The proportion of teens who say social media “often distracts me when I should be paying attention to the people I’m with” has grown from 44 percent in 2012 to 54 percent in 2018.

But it’s also important for parents and educators to ask what they might be missing out on, Robb said. 

Almost a third of teens consider social media “very” or “extremely” important in their lives, the survey found. For many teens, social media is the primary vehicle for organizing and participating in their social lives. And the teens who score lowest on measures of happiness, depression, self-esteem, loneliness, and relationships with their parents are the most likely to say social media is important to them, Common Sense found.

Before rushing to discourage social media use, Robb said, grown-ups should think twice.

“You don’t want to accidentally cut off a major source of support and connections for teens who really need it,” he said.

Overstating the Social Media Threat?

And big-picture, teens themselves don’t seem to feel that social media is nearly the threat that it’s been made out to be by parents and popular culture.

Overall, teens are not more likely to self-report feeling lonely, depressed, or unhappy after using social media than they were in 2012, Common Sense found, in fact, that 20 percent of teens said using social media makes them feel more confident, compared to 4 percent who said it makes them feel less confident.

In addition, the researchers found almost no connection between the frequency of teens’ social media use and their social-emotional well-being (by asking teens whether they agreed or disagreed with statements such as “I like myself” and “Compared to other people my age, I feel normal.”)

And despite popular fears, the majority of teens surveyed said that getting new friends, followers, and likes on social media is not particularly important to them.

Such findings may come as a surprise to many educators, who often describe a losing battle to keep up with their students’ social media use. A recent survey by the Education Week Research Center, for example, found that more than half of U.S. K-12 school principals are ‘extremely concerned’ about their students’ social media use outside the classroom.

Robb said the takeaway is not that everything is hunky-dory, but that there are specific areas where grown-ups can help.

Digital distractions, for example, are clearly a problem, and teens have a “decidedly mixed track record” at regulating their own social media usage, Common Sense found. 

Fifty-seven percent of teens agreed that social media distracts them from homework, for example, but fewer than one-third usually turn off or silence their phones during homework time. Similarly, 44 percent of cellphone-owning teens said they regularly keep their phones on and active at night, leading to sleep that is sometimes interrupted by calls, texts, and notifications.  

On that front, Robb said, parents can have an immediate impact through such basic steps as insisting that teens charge their phones outside of their bedrooms at night.

Educators can also target their supports better by recognizing that students who are the most socially and emotionally vulnerable also appear most likely to experience feelings of missing out or low self-worth as the result of using social media, he said.

And there are steps the companies behind the most popular social media sites can take to encourage healthier use of their products, Robb said.

Nearly two-thirds of teen Snapchat users, for example, say they’ve participated in a feature called Snapstreaks, which rewards friends who communicate with each other over the platform every day. More than a third of teens who’ve tried the feature find it stressful, Common Sense found. 

It’s a great example of why so many teens believe they are being manipulated by tech companies, Robb said. And the adults around them shouldn’t take for granted that social media has to present them with such powerful forces to resist.

“It’s low-hanging fruit that [Snapchat] could address by making design choices that don’t deliberately put undue pressure on teens to use a platform when they don’t have any internal need to,” he said.

Photo: Bill Tiernan for Education Week. 

See also:

Follow @BenjaminBHerold for the latest news on ed-tech policies, practices, and trends.

Source: http://blogs.edweek.org/edweek/DigitalEducation/2018/09/teen_social_media_skyrocketing.html