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kdramas-ruined-my-life · 4 years

Note

Hiii! My prompt choice for your short hwanghans is "42. I’m going to save you from the terrible date you’re having" because I can imagine either one swooping in to save the other from a blind date gone wrong. Looking forward to the next installment of By Your Side!!

Oooh I love this prompt! Thank you so much for asking it! I hope you enjoy it! It can also be found on Ao3!!!

Inspector Han Yeo-Jin tapped out a pattern on the table as she tried to stop herself from rolling her eyes for the fourth time that evening.

Her mother had called her last week randomly as she was leaving work and had told her that she had arranged a blind date with the son of one of her friends. Yeo-Jin was reluctant as she told her mother yes. She was too busy to date, and besides, there were not a lot of men who were interested in dating female police officers.

“...And my company had been developing a new algorithm for analyzing both macro and microeconomics to come up with a...” explained her date as he droned on and on about something she couldn’t even remember ten seconds later.

From the few seconds that she had actually paid attention to the man, she had learned that he was a businessman, apparently someone VERY high up in the corporate world. It seemed like he was used to getting his way with the world. Men like him annoyed her. She had met plenty of them when she interrogated them for fraud, theft, and murder.

His appearance added to her overall dislike of the man. Sure he was attractive by societal standards, but it just didn’t appeal to her. His hair was short and slicked back. The large watch on his wrist and his Italian leather shoes screamed “look at me I have money.” It all reminded her of someone. Everyone’s favorite weasel, Seo Dong Jae.

She had been trying to find a way to get out of the dinner without making a scene. If it was a more casual restaurant, she would have simply stood up and left, but if she did that there, in such a nice restaurant, it would just draw attention.

As she tugged the hem of her black dress down for the fiftieth time that evening, she leaned back in her chair. She thought of any way that she could get out of this situation. Was there anyone who could help her?

Jang Geon mentioned that he was going camping with his family, there wasn’t really anyone she was close to at work, and while she was on better terms with Choi Bit, they weren’t on good enough terms for her to help Yeo-Jin.

It was just then that it struck her. Prosecutor Hwang. It was a stretch, but she remembered from their last text messages a couple of weeks ago that he was going to be in Seoul for some sort of gala for the prosecution. He said he didn’t want to attend, but some of his superiors wanted to send him as a representative for the Wonju firm.

The question was, would he help her? She knew that he didn’t like to get involved in social situations, but she thought he might do it for her. Plus, they hadn’t seen each other since they separated at the restaurant a couple of months ago.

Discreetly pulling out her phone from her purse and setting it in her lap where she could type under the table without her date noticing, she sent a quick text.

Hi Prosecutor Hwang! I know you’re super busy with the gala tonight, but is there any way that you could come to the restaurant that I am at? My mother set me up with a blind date and I feel like I am two seconds away from punching him. How do you feel about preventing me from harming a civilian?

She quickly sent the text and was about to turn her phone off when she pulled her messages back up and sent him an emoji of a cartoon cat winking.

Turning her screen off, Yeo-Jin once again brought her attention back to her date, trying to feign even a small of interest. She really needed Hwang Si-Mok to help her out. It was almost as if that thought had summoned him, the phone in her lap letting out a soft buzz. Glancing at her phone, she saw a single short text.

On my way.

~~~

It had been fifteen minutes and thirty-six seconds since she had received Si-Mok’s reply, and yes she was counting the seconds.

Fortunately, they had only just finished their appetizers and had not ordered the next course. She didn’t want to pay for an overpriced, extremely small portion of food if she was going to leave soon.

However, much to her dismay, the waiter set down two small menus in front of them. She was so close to not having to pay.

Grabbing the menu, Yeo-Jin saw that only four entrees were listed in the front. Flipping to the other side, she noticed that the back was blank. The prices were not even listed on the menu.

Mentally rolling her eyes at the insanity of such a menu, Yeo-Jin fingered the edge, planning to make sure that choosing one of those four entrees was going to be the hardest and longest task she had ever done.

It was then when she noticed a few women at the table beside them start whispering as they looked off in the direction behind Yeo-Jin’s chair. Their slightly wide eyes and opened mouths made it seem as if they had just spotted their favorite idol or drama star. Happy to have a distraction from her date, Yeo-Jin turned in her seat to look to where the women’s gazes were directed. Her eyes slightly widened, almost matching the looks that were on the other women’s faces.

None other than Prosecutor Hwang Si-Mom had entered the building and was walking her way. It was clear that the prosecutor had just come from somewhere fancy.

He had traded out his usual dark suit for a tailored back tux, the craftsmanship emphasizing the broadness of his shoulders. She was shocked to see that he wore a black bow tie. She had always seen him in a tie.

His eyes met hers from across the restaurant, a look of recognition appearing in his eyes as he took a step in her direction. It had to have only taken him a minute to walk over to where she sat, but it felt like much longer as she watched him move in almost slow motion. His steps were confident as he walked over, almost sauntering as he crossed the room. She watched as he brought a hand up to his hair, ruffling it a little, only heightening the greatness of his messy hair. As he approached the table, Yeo-Jin watched as he fiddled with his cufflinks, his eyes never leaving hers. The female inspector felt her heart skip a beat.

Aigoo, is this a runway?

“Inspector Han Yeo-Jin,” Prosecutor Hwang greeted as he gave a quick bow of his head in her direction, not bothering to even look at her date, “I need your assistance on a case immediately.”

Yeo-Jin slightly shook her head, desperate to shake her Si-Mok-filled thoughts from her head. Setting the menu down in front of her on the table, the female inspector stood up from her chair, grabbing her purse and standing beside Si-Mok.

Turning to her date she gave a simple apology for having to leave. When her date offered for them to continue their date, she politely declined and motioned at Si-Mok that she was ready to go.

Noticing that the prosecutor had motioned for her to go first, she stepped in front of him, the click of her heels on the floor confident and unwavering. At least it was until she felt a large hand on the small of her back, the warmth seeping through her dress. She looked to the side, bringing her eyes to his as the prosecutor ushered her out of the restaurant and into the cold night, his hand still not leaving her back.

As they neared his car, she turned to him, a warm smile on her face as she said, “Thank you for saving me.”

She watched as a warm smile appeared on his face in response as he responded, “Of course.”

She tried to hold back her smile as he opened the door for her to get into his car, his hand against the top of the doorframe as if to protect her from hitting her head. A quick glance into his side mirror proved she failed to hide it.

As he hopped in the car and turned it on, Yeo-Jin realized they didn’t have a destination to go to, the case Si-Mok had mentioned clearly simply an excuse. She was desperate to spend more time with him, to simply stay by his side. It had been so long.

“Would you...” Han Yeo-Jin began as his warm voice also spoke up.

“Do you want...”

Yeo-Jin motioned at him to speak first, a warm smile on her face.

“Do you what to get ramen or udon?” The prosecutor asked with an almost apprehensive look on his face, “The gala had horrible food and I have not had the chance to eat much today.”

Yeo-Jin smiled broadly at him as she lightly punched him on the arm, “Aigoo, we must have telepathy. I was just about to ask you that.”

Si-Mok responded with a small smile and she was once again struck by his beauty. Sitting beside him in his car was peaceful, the outside world a blur of neon lights and people talking.

It looked as if he had almost wanted to say something but Si-Mok turned his attention away from her as he pulled out of the parking spot and onto the road.

Yeo-Jin really wanted to know what he was about to say, but she knew he would tell her eventually. He always did.

Looking over at Si-Mok, she felt her lips quirk up into yet another smile since he had saved her from her horrible date.

“So, how was the gala?” Yeo-Jin asked as she leaned back in her seat, “Oh, and how’s Wonju? You’ll have to tell me all about it....”

It was a pleasant drive to the pop-up bar, their conversations as connected and friendly as always, and if Si-Mok had taken the longer route to get there, no one had commented on it.

#secret forest 2 #stranger 2 #hwang si mok #han yeo jin #hwanghan #secret forest #hwang shi mok #tvn stranger #tvn secret forest #my fic #writing prompt #asks #cupofteaandstars

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ficdirectory · 8 years

Text

Disuphere (An AU Fosters family fic) Chapter 34

CHAPTER 34

Jesus is totally present. Totally focused. Totally here. And yet, somehow, he’s none of those things. All he knows is Brandon flipped some invisible switch. Jesus is in full on manimal mode, because Brandon’s stupid face is just right there, and Jesus has to punch it.

Brandon’s lip is split. His cheek is gonna bruise. But somehow, despite years of lifting weights, and Brandon’s years of not lifting weights, he gets the upper hand. Jesus is on his back, and Brandon is wailing on him, screaming:

“Do you have any idea how much I’ve had to give up because of you?! My dad isn’t even allowed in this house because of you! Because you can’t tell the difference - in your freaking traumatized head - between a good guy and a sociopath!”

Jesus is ready to go for round two, but hands are pulling Brandon off. Callie’s yelling, “Brandon! That’s enough!”

On his feet, Jesus’s eyes flash and he takes a step, ready to knock Brandon to next week, but Mom’s between them. She warns Jesus back with a look - the only person who could stop him in his quest to beat Brandon’s ass.

Jesus’s head clears in time to see Brandon walking away. Hear the door slamming. Frankie crying.

Damn. He really messed up this time.

Callie’s still here, should Mom need her, but he sees their silent conversation. Catches Mom’s shake of the head, dismissing her.

“I need you,” she says with an intense firmness, “to sit down now.”

He does. It’s not until he does that Jesus realizes he is shaking. Mom is not messing around. She squats in front of him (a bit lower on purpose) so that her face and her eyes are right there to focus on. He drops his gaze. His adrenaline’s still surging, but he’s fine. Just bruised his knuckles.

“Focus on me, Jesus,” Mom says. “Push your feet down into the floor. Square yourself up. Hands on your knees. Head up. Breathe. Slowly.”

It’s like Mom’s on repeat because she doesn’t stop until she is sure as hell that Jesus is present. Then, she addresses him. “That can absolutely never happen again. Do you understand me?”

“Yes,” he murmurs. It’s the single hardest word for him to say. He almost never can, except that Mom needs to know that he is listening. That he is taking her seriously.

“What if Frankie was there? What if she tried to break you two up before I got there?”

“I don’t know,” he manages.

“Mama mentioned you said you wanted to work on your triggers. That she offered our help.”

Jesus nods. He remembers the conversation, and Mama asking later, if she can share it with Mom. He remembers nodding.

“Part of being in a family, being our son, and being human, means you can trust Mama and me.”

“Mom…” Jesus can feel his ears burning. He’s heard this. It’s embarrassing that she thinks he needs to hear it again.

“I can see this is making you uncomfortable, Jesus, but I need you to hang in there with me. This is important. Can you listen?”

He nods. Wills his ears to stop burning.

“You can trust us and you need to be able to trust us to keep you safe. I understand that as a very little boy...and later...you’ve had experiences that have made trusting adults very hard.”

“Yeah.” Jesus swallows. Nods.

“I need you to know that this is different. Mama and I will be here for you. We’ll help you. We have never hurt you and we never will. It’s our responsibility as your parents to keep you safe. But with six of you, we don’t always catch when you’re in distress.”

He can’t help it. He shrugs. Jesus is so used to that.

“It’s not no big deal, love. It’s the biggest deal. You and your brothers and sisters deserve to have us there when you need us. But to do that, we need to know you need us. So, I want to talk about an option with you.”

“Okay.”

“Okay? Are you still with me?” she asks.

“Yeah. I am,” he says.

“Okay. First, with you and Brandon, can you pinpoint any warning signs that you were under stress?”

Nod.

“Okay. You don’t need to share them if you’re not comfortable. I just need to know that you recognize them.”

Nod again.

“Talk to me, Jesus. Yes?”

“Yeah.” (Sometimes he gets in the habit of nodding, and without even realizing it, he’ll be a million miles away in seconds. Good thing Mom knows that.)

“So, I want to practice something with you, when you’re ready.” Mom says. Jesus wonders if her calves are in agony from popping a squat for that long.

“Practice what?” He can’t keep the wariness out of his voice. (Not when He talked about so many obscene things using common language.)

“Calling for backup.”

Jesus breathes a sigh of relief. “Like police?”

“Kind of,” she smiles.

She talks him through it. How cops never go in a dangerous situation without backup. Same goes if a regular situation turns dangerous. She talks about how it will serve a dual purpose: it will alert Moms that he needs them, but it will also send a message to whoever he’s having a hard time with. Literally: “Back up.”

They spend a ton of time on this. She has him practice saying it, regular volume. Then calling it out. They even do a mock trigger. They find Mariana in the girls’ room and ask if she has bracelets that don’t jangle. And can she pretend they do? It’s so ridiculous, he can call for Moms, no problem.

Mom brings him back to the couch. He gets focused again. And Mom’s serious. “Mama’s been talking to B out back. We need to speak to both of you about what happened. Can you keep it together while we do that?”

“If I can’t, can I call backup?” he asks, wondering when exactly this new thing will be put to the test.

“I would prefer that to a brawl, yes,” Mom nods, and then sends Mama a text. They come in the back door and sit across the room. Mom stands. Doesn’t miss the way Jesus pats the empty space next to him on the couch.

She sits.

Jesus can see by Brandon’s bright eyes that he and Mama have been having some real talk. She always manages to get to the heart of something - to get people to open up - even if they’re a vault like Brandon.

“This is very serious. We do not condone violence in this house. It’s part of what keeps us all safe. So I need you,” Mom turns to Brandon, “to stop antagonizing your brother.”

“I didn’t even say anything and he jumped on me!” Brandon denies.

Jesus is on his feet, eyes flashing. Mom is, too, at his side, like an angel on his shoulder.

“Backup,” she cues.

“Back. Up.” Jesus insists, over-enunciating each word.

“I’m right here. Can you sit back down? Breathe?” Mom reassures, while Mama appeals to Brandon.

“You want to rethink that and try again?” she asks softly.

“I was just kidding around. Nobody gets my humor…” he pouts.

“Do either of you want to tell us what was said?” Mama asks. “To precipitate this?”

Jesus looks Brandon in the eye. He doesn’t care to rehash it. Their fists did the talking. Jesus wouldn’t recommend it, obviously, but sometimes a good ass-kicking clears the air. Jesus shakes his head. So does Brandon.

“So, Jesus, I need your word No more physical violence, yes?”

“No. Yeah, I promise.”

“And B?” Mom turns to him. “Whatever you said? Never again.”

Brandon nods. It’s the first time Jesus can remember that Brandon’s been put in his place by Moms about anything.

That night, after dinner, Jesus is on his laptop, trying to think about what to say to Ethan. So far, he has:

Ethan-

Not a great start.

“What was that about earlier?” Mariana asks. “Are you okay?”

“Fine,” he manages and then kicks himself mentally. Why, every time that she brings herself to talk to him, does he shut her down?

He wants to say “Sorry, come back,” but no words come.

Jesus is up late, just staring at his laptop screen. Trying to figure out how to fix everything. Brandon walks through at 11:00, ice cream drumstick in his hand.

He couldn’t do it with Mariana, but maybe, with their fight clearing the air like it had, Jesus can talk to Brandon. He still hates what Brandon said, but looking at his busted lip helps a lot. (It’s everything Jesus wished he could do to Him.)

Jesus doesn’t talk about losing his mind and pounding Brandon’s face in. Instead, he asks about one of the things he said, mid-fight, that Jesus can’t figure out:

“What’d you give up for me?” Jesus asks, when Brandon’s almost to the stairs.

For a beat, Jesus thinks Brandon will just ignore him and go upstairs, but he backtracks to the open doorway. Nods to the piano with its lid closed. Every week Jesus dusts the thing, but he’s right, since Jesus has been home, Brandon hasn’t played.

“Dude. Seriously?”

“Yeah. But you know, whatever…” Brandon shrugs.

“I don’t get it. Look, I’ll be the first to admit it: I can’t stand you most of the time...but I seriously dig your piano stuff.”

Brandon’s eyebrows raise. His mouth drops open. He closes it. “Are you messing with me?”

“Dude. No. I listen to that song you put on YouTube as a little shit every day.” (In the shower. But Jesus doesn’t add that.) “It’s the only thing I can listen to that doesn’t give me hella flashbacks….because He had absolutely no musical talent.”

Silence.

Jesus tries again. (Honor each other’s feelings.) “The world isn’t better without your talent, bro. It’s worse.”

Brandon stands there, licking his ice cream.

Then:

“I don’t think you’re a dog.”

Jesus blinks. Okay then.

“Night,” Brandon says, and disappears upstairs.

#fic: disuphere #fosters fic

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crystal-cloudy · 8 years

Note

do all the asks...... i wanna kno what ur fav kesha song is

oh my god, this is the best thing. thank you kind soul

1. You woke up naked next to the last person you texted, what would you say?

Let’s see... The last person I texted was my coworker who had her last day today, so I would probably just be like “is that _____ from work?”

2. What’s going on between you and the last person you kissed?

Never kissed nobody so I can’t say that.

3. If your boyfriend or girlfriend was into drugs, would you care?

I would care, at least to know. It depends on the drugs in terms of what kind of care. I would be concerned if it was hard drugs, I’d just be like “be careful” if it was pot or something, and that is legal now so...

4. Is your last name longer than six letters?

Yes, by precisely one letter.

5. Was your last kiss drunk or sober?

NEVER KISSED NOBODY

6. Have you ever wanted to have someone but you messed it up?

You mean every time I have a crush? Yes.

7. What does your last received text say?

“Please come home, I need the car.”

8. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed?

stawp

9. Where was your last kiss at?

10. When is the last time you saw your sister?

About 5 minutes ago when she plopped my cat onto my bed

11. What do you drink in the morning?

Depends on the morning. Usually iced tea, coffee, orange juice, or water.

12. Where did you sleep last night?

My bed, and also a little on my couch.

13. Do you think relationships are hard?

Hells yes.

14. If you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you?

Yes. I would change a lot of things.

15. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, any problems?

None at all, because it’s an empty room.

16. Would you rather it be sunny or rainy?

Rainy, but with a bright sky.

17. Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you?

No actually! Or at least not off the top of my head. Well there is one girl, but it’s spelled differently.

18. Are you wearing jeans,sweatpants,or pajama pants?

Leggings, biatch.

19. Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 years from now?

I would certainly like to fucking be.

20. Does anyone like you?

Not to my knowledge.

21. Have you ever kissed someone with a name that starts with an S?

NO SIR

22. Is the last person you kissed gay?

FUuuuUUuuUU

23. Is there a person you CANNOT stand?

I mean, there are a few people I get really annoyed by, but no one I am particularly upset by.

24. Have you ever considered getting a tattoo?

YES.

25. In the past week have you cried?

Seeing as I cried just 5 minutes ago, yeah.

26. What breed was the last dog you saw?

OH OH I KNOW THIS a golden retriever. He was a good boy!!

27. Do you dry off in the shower or out of the shower?

I start in the shower, then get out and finish in the open air.

28. Have you ever kissed a football player?

Nope.

29. Do you think you’re old?

Nah man, I’m a youth.

30. Do you like text messaging?

Not particularly. Too many misunderstandings. But I think it’s useful.

31. What type of day are you having?

Bad.

32. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced?

Hells yes. I honestly really want to.

33. Do you prefer warm or cold weather?

Cold weather, so I can bundle up under blankets. But I also really like warm weather because a lot of my clothes have holes or are fishnet, etc.

34. Is there a person of the opposite sex who means a lot to you?

Yes.

35. Would you prefer a relationship or a fling?

I’d prefer a relationship, but I’ll take anything at this point.

36. Are you a simple or complicated person?

I feel like I’m complicated probably.

37. What song are you listening to?

Jack the Ripper by Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds

38. When you say you’re sorry do you mean it?

Always. I have never once said sorry without meaning it. I genuinely hate upsetting anyone, and even if I wouldn’t change what I had done, I still am at least sorry for causing problems.39. Is there a girl that knows everything or almost everything about you?

Kind of??? Not really. There’s one person, but that’s my sister, who is not a girl!!! (as in nonbinary. I refuse to call them a girl, but we use the term sister)40. What made you start liking the person you like now?

Connection over history. I’m such a geek.41. When did you last receive a text message?

This morning at 9am.42. What is wrong with you right now?

A LOT. Kind of everything.43. How well do you know the last female you texted?

Semi-well. Again, coworkers.44. Does anyone disgust you?

A fair number of people.45. Would you date someone right now if they asked?

Yes.46. Are you in a good mood right now?

Not really.47. Who was the last person you talked to in person?7

My sib.48. What color shirt are you wearing?

Black, with a hint of cat fur.49. Has someone recently told you something you didn’t want to hear?

Oh yes.50. Anyone you’re giving up on?

A few, if I’m being completely honest.51. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for?

A little bit, tbh.

52. Have you ever thought about giving up on someone but couldn’t?

Honestly half the people in my life.53. Do you like rain?

Yes. 54. Do you care if your boyfriend/girlfriend drinks?

Not really, as long as it’s not a drinking problem.55. Have you ever liked somebody and never told them?

Oh yes. 56. Do you like to cuddle?

Hells yeah bitch.57. Are you shy?

Yes. I’m terrified of talking to people. 58. Do you get along with girls?

For the most part yeah!59. Have you dated the person you texted last?

Nope. 60. What do you carry with you at all times?

A hair tie. 61. If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you?

Probably. I’d be freaked out but I can stand being freaked out for a fucking million bucks. That’d pay for my education and then some. maybe my own car. 62. Do you think you can last in a relationship for five months?

I don’t know. never been in one, so i dont really know how id be. 63. Think back to October, were you in a relationship?

No sirree. 64. The person you like kisses you on the forehead, do you find this cute?

yes. very much indeed.65. Did anything “cute” happen in the last week?

The person and me had a bunch of interactions because they were sick all week (still came to class) and I asked them everyday how they were doing and tried to give them advice, which they always responded to.

66. How old are the last three people you kissed?

. fuck this quiz.

67. Would you rather pay to get your nails done or do them yourself?

Neither??? I don’t deal with my nails, I use my hands too much. If I had to pick, I’d get a professional to do them. At least then they’ll look decent...68. Which do you like better- Zebra print or leopard print?

Leopard print, by a long shot.69. Do you have any stickers on your car?

No. Esp cuz it’s my family car, not personally mine.70. Would you rather listen to Luke Bryan or Lil Wayne?

I don’t know either of their musical styles, but I’ve heard of Lil Wayne, so I guess him.71. Blackberry, Android, or iPhone?

Well I have an android, but if I had the choice I would want an iPhone.72. When’s the last time you had pizza from Pizza Hut?

A few years, but man I kinda miss it.73. Do you like diet soda?

No. It is the bane of my existence and the fall of humanity.74. What color are the walls in your room?

Bright turquoise, from my ten year old IM SO RANDOOOOOM phase. Ugh.75. Are you 16 or older?

Older than 16, but by less than a few years.76. Do you watch Pretty Little Liars?

Nah.77. Do you have a job?

Yep! 78. What are your initials?

SCW.79. Did you ever have braces?

I did, for 18 months when I was 12/13/14. I hated them.80. Are you from the south?

I am not. Nor’easter, coming at ya.

81. What does your last status on facebook say?

“If anyone hears of someone held up at and denied entry at Logan Airport in Boston because of Muslim or refugee status, please have them or relatives contact ACLU Massachusetts at 617-482-3170 x330. Please share widely! (Copy and Paste)”82. Do you still talk to the first person you ever kissed?

The number you are dialing cannot be reached.83. Are you closer to your mom or your dad?

Definitely to my mom. It’s hard to get close to my dad.84. Have you ever done cheerleading or gymnastics?

I did gymnastics when I was 4. I am a dancer though.85. What’s the last movie you saw in theaters?

uhhhh, good question. Moana? Maybe?86. Do you smoke?

No, but it becomes more and more appealing.87. Would you rather wear heels or flip flops?

Heels bitch.88. Is your phone touch screen?

Touch screen.89. Do you normally wear your hair straight or curly?

Natural? 90. Have you ever snuck out of your house?

Nope.91. Would you rather swim in a river, lake, or pool?

I’m a geek, I know, but a pool...92. Have you ever made out in a car?

No.93. …Had sex in a car?

No.94. Are you single or in a relationship?

Single, and #foreveralone 95. What were you doing last night at midnight?

Watching GBBO with my sib and eating mini kitkats.96. When’s the last time you saw fireworks?

Fourth of July!97. Do you like the camera on your phone?

I think it’s pretty good.98. Have you ever had a friend with benefits?

No.99. Have you ever passed out from drinking?

No, although I have wanted to.100. Are you friends with people on facebook that you actually hate?

No.101. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare?

No.102. Name your favorite Kesha song:

I think it’s probably “Your Love Is My Drug”, although I’m a fan of “Gold Trans Am”.103. Do you have any tan lines right now?

No, I don’t go outside enough for that.104. Would you ever wear cowboy boots with shorts?

Depending on the shorts, I might, yeah. Could be cute.

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mylifeasilivedit · 6 years

Text

Catch Up With Me

Hello

Wow, it sure has been a long time hasn’t it? I think it’s been almost exactly two years since I last posted here. If anyone actually read what I wrote (which I HIGHLY doubt), I’m sure you’ve been very disappointed that my mind hasn’t been put into words in such a long time. For that, I apologize. I guess I should catch you up on my life.

It’s currently summer 2018, im living with my parents again on the dawn of my junior year in college and to be honest, I can’t wait to get back to Flagstaff. Summer has bored me to tears and I miss my home. I just want to be around my people again, and learn more, even if that means I have to keep working at FUCKING TARGET.

Yeah so anyways, its been two years. My freshman year was kind rough, I ended up getting back together with my ex-boyfriend and we had a not surprisingly rocky long-distance relationship. Whatever, I like playing with fire right? I cheered and roomed with my sort-of best friend from high school (We’ll call her B). As of current, both of those decisions have crashed and burned. B and I aren’t on speaking terms because she is a bitch, and I fucked my wrist up beyond repair so I had to retire from cheer.

For the most part, I’m in a pretty good place. I did read through my last post about being so angry and cynical, and suffice to say some parts of me still feel that way. I continued to date my on-again off-again ex-boyfriend, and we even seperated for a six month hiatus before he wiggled his way back into my good graces. Honestly, he’d completely changed but so had I.

I am no longer that soft, sweet girl I use to be. I am hardened, calloused, and so brash that a lot of things don’t get to me anymore. Don’t get me wrong, I have developed crippling anxiety that flares up during inconvenient times, but in terms of relationships and love, I am a rock. I don’t budge, and I’m pretty sure the last time I cried was MONTHS ago, so I’m grrrrrreat.

I miss cheer, and I miss being young. (Yeah okay I only just turned 20, but I feel OLD)

I still want to be a badass lawyer, and I’m currently killing the game. I took two of the hardest law classes to date, and I aced both of them. I don’t think I’ve ever been so proud of myself for persevering. I had to miss my brothers college graduation to take the crim final, and cried for hours over it. I guess the A makes it worth it, and I have to say: the validation is sweet. It makes me feel like I’m actually doing something right, and I’m on the right path.

Okay, so I know I did a terrible job summing up the past two years, but thats all you really needed to know right? Otherwise I’m a pretty quiet, boring person. I do my own thing in my own way, and I’m happy about it. I guess...

My ex and I broke up again, but I wanna say this time it’s permanent. I know, smite me. But since our hiatus last year, we’ve been sort of together for the past couple months. He’s sweet, caring, kind, considerate, and everything I ever wished he’d be. But I can’t fall in love. I am too hard, and too scarred. I have felt myself completely close off and I can no longer offer my heart.

Sometimes I get sad and wonder if i’ll ever be so deeply in love again. I want to be so badly, so smitten with someone. I want to wear my heart of my sleeve, but its just not with my ex, and I finally did something about it. Writing about it now is making me glum, and I’m already bummed enough as it is, so let’s talk about the positives in my life!

I’m writing a novel.

I know! I can’t believe it either. I found a topic Idea I love, and I’ve been plotting it out. As of the past week I’ve been a little blocked, but I’m so in love with my idea i’m sure I’ll persevere eventually. It’s too good an idea not to write. I just hope I’m doing it justice. Maybe you can read it if it gets published. Far fetched dream, but hey, whats wrong with dreaming? I dream about being an author and a lawyer, and I’ll make it happen.

In other good news, I’m flying to Minnesota in a little less than a month. I know what your thinking, EUCH what is in Minnesota? Well, family. My biological dad and I are going to see his parents since I haven’t seen them in like four years. They missed my HS graduation and I missed my brothers UNI graduation, so I guess they miss me? I’m still a little irked about them missing my HS graduation, but hey, they gave my a college fund and now are sponsering a trip for me to go see them, so I can’t complain too much. I think i’m most excited about see my Aunt Lisa. She went to law school! Did she graduate, UH NO she dropped out to marry my uncle, but she did the basics. She passed the LSAT and got into college, so I’m a little impressed. Anyway, she can help me, and I am open to any and all help in the law school department.

I’m getting my wisdom teeth out in a couple weeks. I bet your thinking why this is good news, so let me explain. My wisdom teeth are impacted, so my jaw fucking kills (excuse my eloquent writing). I tried putting ice into a blending to make a slushie to aid my aching mandible, but it tasted like tap water so naturally I gagged. Anyway, I’m excited to get these suckers out of my head because they hurt. My mom did schedule the appointment for Friday the 13th, so odds are I’m not gonna wake up after surgery. Hopefully, thats not the case cause that would suck. Then you might never hear from me again, as opposed to only hearing from me every two years HA!

Overall, I’m okay. I’m bummed about being single, but also VERY excited for it. I mean, I’ve only ever had sex with one person. Who know what else is waiting for me out there! Kidding, I’m not looking for hookups, but meeting someone new and having that excited crush feeling is so appealing, I’m thrilled to be single. I need to be by myself, work on myself, and maybe stare at dreamy boys from a distance. Yeah, let’s go with that.

Well I kind of said all of my thoughts, but for memory’s sake I’ll put a few of my current obsessions. Maybe the next time I write in two years I can look back and laugh at what I loved when I was twenty.

Favorite Songs: Blossom by Milky Chance, Thor Ragnarok Immigrant Song, Suddenly I see by KT, and others I guess.

I am completely obsessed with Tom Holland, like it’s really bad. Peter Parker died in infinity War but he’s got a second Spiderman movie coming out in the coming years, so I’m convinced he’ll come back.

My dream of being a YouTuber is still strong, but I doubt anyone would wanna watch me, so I once again shelf that dream.

I also have a new obsession with Tom Hiddleston? What is my obsession with british boys? This girl NEEDS to travel to the UK and fall in love with a british boy, like badly.

Hey man, my name is korg.

As stupid as all of the above sounded, it feels good to type a little. I need to do this more often, its nice to express some feelings. Maybe soon I’ll write more in depth posts about my feelings but for now, I’ll spare all of my non-existant readers.

I was feeling a little upbeat on 27 June 2018 xx

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katysaid · 7 years

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poo party

I have never really wanted kids. The, “How many kids do you want?” question always gives me anxiety. I always think, “A whole pack...of the sour patch variety” because, lets be honest guys, I would be a really good Mom to a few packs of sour patch kids.

But a real life come-out-of-my-vagina-human-who-grows-up-depending-on-me-for-survival? Yikes.

I always thought, “A dog would be the perfect child.” You get the satisfaction of caring for a mini breathing being but they don’t talk back to you. They don’t scream in the grocery store, or puke on your brand new pair of pants, or lock you out of their bedroom while blasting emotional music while telling you to go fuck yourself. Sounds appealing, no?

I have a four and a half year old pug, Frankie, who has been with me since he was six weeks old. I got him on my 25th birthday as a reminder of my adulthood (ha!) and parenting abilities for something other than sour candy (ha!) He has been the perfect friend for me and the perfect distraction for my friends to not ask me any probing questions in regards to my dreams of life with a fetus. Steve doesn’t really want kids, either. Depending on the day that I ask his answers range from, “Meh” to “Nah” to “I don’t think so” to complete silence with his heart bumping out palpitations to the beat of a Taylor Swift song that he hates.

Kids aren’t his thing, but vacuums are.

Four weeks ago I got a text from Steve at work letting me know that he spent three hours watching Youtube videos of the Roomba robotic vacuums. My heart started bumping to the same Taylor Swift song when I realized this is my future. He became obsessed with this vacuum. The next day, we HAD to go purchase it. It basically costs half the amount of a months rent, but we NEEDED it (we already had a pretty good vacuum, to be honest) and we NEEDED it that day. We got the vacuum. We came home and Steve cleaned the entire apartment to make way for the Roomba’s grand debut. He quickly changed from a saucer in a cardboard box to ‘Jerry’, our newest family member. His arrival was exciting, cutting edge, electric. He was our dream come true, and Frankie’s worst nightmare.

A dog is the perfect child, unless it’s my dog, a cling-to-you-like-velcro-black-ball-of-chub. So what does a Frankie type of dog do when he isn’t the apple of his owners eyes anymore? He drives me to the breaking point of typing up a Craigslist Ad, ‘Free Pug, Come And Get Him!’ - Just kidding, guys. Come on. No one would take Frankie.

Frankie has always been a bit of a shithead but hes my child so this was to be expected, but these past three weeks he has been extra shitty (literally). Frankie got his manhood cut off about two years ago, and since that (amazing) day he hasn’t had any accidents at home.

Not. One. Single. Accident. At. Home.

Until...Jerry arrived.

I came home from work today to the smell of a thousand shits floating through my apartment. I closed my eyes and asked, “Why God?” I walked to the living room, and there I saw it. Not one, but two, huge piles of freshly hatched shit. I saw tire marks. Brown splattered everywhere over the carpet, the wood floor, leading up and down our hallways like some figure skating act. Then I realized what had happened.

Frankie and Jerry betrayed us.

Jerry spread Frankie’s feces all over our beloved apartment. I sat on the couch texting Steve with tears streaming down my face asking myself how I got to this place. How did I get here, in this moment? In a real life shit hurricane. I changed into my worst clothes and got to work. I scrubbed, rinsed, scrubbed, rinsed, then scrubbed some more. When I thought all the shit was gone, more revealed itself to me. “Do you want to go get sangria?”, Steve texted.

Oh hell yeah I did.

There wasn’t enough jugs of sangria in Kitsilano to help with the tragedy that was my life in this moment. We laughed at the table over chips and salsa while slamming back red, white, whatever colour is available sangria wondering, “how could our children do this to us?” We went to the supermarket to get three items. Paper towel, a tooth brush, and a pair of gloves. We had a harrowing night ahead of us. We stood over our kitchen sink. One of us brushing Jerry’s wheels pretending we were a dentist, while the other dry-heaved in preparation for what was about to become our hardest moment as parents. We cleaned all the outer shit off of Jerry, but in order to get to all the special spots, we needed to open him up. There he was, on our kitchen counter, prepping for open heart surgery. One, two, three hours passed. We did it. In that moment all four of us sang ‘Out Of The Woods’ by Taylor Swift while Steve and I shared a kiss over a sink and counter filled to the brim with poo particles while praying we don’t contract pink eye tomorrow.

Karma and sibling rivalry are a bitch, and they both got us this time. We learned a valuable lesson in never giving attention to one more than the other. To never not tell Frankie he is our King, and that we worship the ground he walks shits on. To never underestimate the power Jerry has in his wheels and how he can really start a shit show at any given moment. Most importantly, though, we learned the answer to the popular question: “When are you having kids?”

“Never.”

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