#I really want them to do one on the women’s wrestler chyna but I’m not sure if that will happen

[rainchyna]

𓆩♡𓆪 episode seven: FIRST DEFENSE. (original vers.)

chanelle made two versions?!!??!? everyone pretended to be shocked pls i had to lol i wanted a more canon version of the episode so i made this i dont know if it makes sense but i hope at least lmao hunter is the loml clown anon stay mad LOL

12:00 pm, y/n’s locker room.

there is a sudden european tour, no one expected it because it literally came out of nowhere. the next european tour was supposed to be next March through to June, but here you were along with everyone else.

“why do you look so cross?” Davey asked, you huff. “seriously, you’ve been pissed this whole morning” Bret leans forward. almost all of your friends were crammed in your locker room.

The Hart Foundation, Steve, Randy, Chyna, Lita, Sherri, Hunter, and oddly Shawn was there too. he was the only one sitting in silence, Shawn hadn’t uttered a single word since he’s come here.

“dude, we’re gonna be there until January, we’re in mid July. there is so much shit I wanna to do here before going on a european tour” you complained, “nah, you’ll have fun” Steve reassured.

you groaned as you got up and stretched. you’ve all been crammed here for hours at this point just chatting and planning the things you’ll do on tour, you quickly left the room to walk around a bit.

as your hands massaged your neck you heard footsteps behind you, you look back then smile. “hey angel” Hunter said as he caught up to you, “heyyyy” you drag as you lean on his shoulder, Hunter reached his hand and patted on your hair and played with it. “you okay?” he asked, “I’m so annoyed” you whine, “I swear it’s been like creative has been on drugs this whole week” and Hunter sighs.

“tell me about it” he mutters.

you squeeze him tighter and he kisses the top of your head. you and Hunter have been having a thing for while now, ever since the night after the club.

“I gotta go, Vince wants to see me” you slowly pull away from him, “but I want you to stay” Hunter pouts and you chuckle, “I do too” you smile. “do you wanna hang out later?” Hunter asks, you nod and squeeze him again.

he walks you to Vince’s office, his hand swinging yours like a toy.

you push the door open and he stands behind you and leans agains the wall, “you’re not coming?” you ask, he frowns a bit. “why would I? Vince wants to see you” he says, you pout then enter.

“hey” you walk in, “come in y/n” Vince smiles, “I have some news for you!”.

oh god.

“sit down, this is really exciting!” he reassures, “I mean, you seem excited by it. I hope it is” you sigh.

“for tonight, I want you, Chyna and Lita to be the first women in history to main event Raw” he says.

oh.

“you’re gonna defend your championship against them, and this time, the match can be as long you want it to be. I should’ve listened to you last time. I just want you to do one thing, make this match better than your debut match, I know it’s not going to be difficult for you. you’re a good wrestler, so put on a good show” he encouraged.

you almost didn’t hear a thing from what he said. main event Raw? with your friends? a defense match for as long as you want?

this is going to be so fucking good.

“wait, wait, now hold on, what’s the catch?” you ask, Vince is being too nice. where is this coming from?

“what do you mean?” Vince asks, you narrow your eyes at him. “so you’re just doing this out of the kindness of your heart? just because?” you ask. Vince laughs.

“you’re the needle mover, y/n!” he says and you frown again. “every show you’ve put on has been highly rated, and ever since your debut it’s like it’s been raining money on us. plus house shows that you’re on sell out, do you know how hard it is to sell out a house show?” he asks.

“well I wouldn’t know” you chuckle, Vince laughs again, “you’re currently the best thing I have going, and I want to treat you accordingly. I want to know if you can be the face of the company, if you can carry it on your back” he explains.

you’re taken aback, flabbergasted even.

“face of the company?? carry it on my back?? are you even aware of what you’re saying?” you ask. he must be on something today.

“yes, and I’m sure of it” he smiles.

seriously, what’s the catch?

3:28 pm, rehearsals hall.

the method to the “Apocalypse of Y/n” in Japan was careful preparation. to this day there is no wrestler that was as over as you were, everyone who worked with you had the match of their career was because of how specific you were when producing your matches. everything had to be in a very, very concise manner.

“I feel like you guys hate me now” you huff, Chyna loudly exhales while Lita nods.

you’ve been putting together your match for almost three and a half hours. practicing and reworking every spot until it’s perfect, you made them rehearse everything at least four times and you were all now exhausted.

“I know I do” Lita breathed making you laugh.

“damn, we really are the main event tonight” Chyna says.

it still feels unreal.

“I know, right” you smile, you were extremely exhausted. if anything, you needed a nap. the sound of Lita and Chyna’s voices seemed to go in and out of your ears as your eyes fought to stay open.

you almost fell asleep.

… almost, that is.

until Owen ran into the room, the loud slam of the door jolting you awake.

“Y/N? Y/N! BRET AND SHAWN ARE FIGHTING AGAIN!”

oh god, you quickly slide off of the ring and run after Owen.

Bret Hart and Shawn Michaels, a tale as old as time. they never had the best relationship and clearly don’t plan on doing so for a while. their relationship was as simple as mutual respect at first, until Shawn rose through the ranks and became the colossal dickhead that he is now. understandable that Bret wouldn’t like him, a lot don’t, even you.

you could hear their yelling from down the hall, you can even hear something crashing and breaking.

the moment you approach them, you immediately push Bret away from Shawn. they’re both cursing and screaming at each other, you, Owen and Jimmy held back Bret while Hunter and Taker held back Shawn.

“what the fuck are you two doing?!” you yell at them, “are you seriously doing this? again?!” and they both scramble to answer you.

“he started it! I didn’t do jackshit to him, it’s his damn fault!” Bret yelled while pointing at him. “ME?! that was you! you ripped my fucking hair out and beat me!” Shawn countered, “because you fucking tried me you cunt-”

“I swear to god, I will slap the taste out of your fucking mouths” you threaten, “is this fucking necessary? every single time? if you two want to fight the parking lot is fucking empty. if you want to sort this out like men, sit your asses in seats and talk it out. how many fucking times are you going to do this, huh? how many times are you going to fucking drag the rest of us into this? I’m genuinely sick of you two fighting like sewer rats, either end it or there will be fucking problems” you spat.

everyone was silent, Bret knew you’d deck his face if he opens his mouth, Taker already had a piece of you that made him a believer and the rest would like to stay in one chunk.

except Shawn, obviously.

“and what does this have to do with you? my problem is with him.” Shawn said.

and indeed you slapped the taste out of his mouth, the sound echoed and the men silently gasped. “the him you’re talking about is my brother, you bitch” you chimed, “and good thing your problem is with him, because personally, I would’ve killed you.”

you turn to Bret, “I thought you knew better”.

<<9:21 pm>>

today has been as been as stressful as a motherfucker.

you’ve been working out for almost two hours now, you wanted to look your best for tonight. you were hopped up on caffeine and energy drinks to stay wide awake. you were nervous for some reason, you’ve done this before, you’ve been the main event in many shows, hell you’ve even headlined pay-per-views, but this felt different for some reason.

your heart was beating fast from being on the treadmill for so long, you got off of the machine, done with your workout. you heart continued beating really fast, it felt like it just kept getting faster and faster and you felt extremely light headed, you barely made it out of the gym before you weren’t able to breathe, that’s when you collapsed to the floor. you must be having a heart attack.

“Y/N?” it was Hunter, you couldn’t bring yourself to speak or call out for him. Hunter ran towards you and picked you up, “what happened? y/n?! talk to me” he scooped you up in his arms and immediately went for the nurse.

this is not good.

everything went by so quickly from an ambulance being called to Hunter, Chyna and Lita going with you to the hospital. Hunter was worried, imagine how you, Vince, Chyna and Lita felt. this simple match was creating history, this was really important for you.

“she’s just severely dehydrated, there’s too much caffeine in your system and you seem to be very overworked” the doctor said.

“can I wrestle?” you ask, all you could think about is the match. “y/n?” Hunter said, “you can, but I don’t recommend you do that” the doctor said.

you can wrestle, and you will.

10:25 pm, Raw <Live>

you were given the last thirty five minutes of the show, so you were going to put on a show. it was about time your gear was ready.

not necessarily ready, but more put together. you had individual items but it took a while to coordinate them.

a basic white tank top and an army green pair of cargo shorts, you wore a chest harness and a thigh harness and topped off with fingerless leather gloves. you styled some combat boots that stopped a inch below your knees and the necklace that Hunter gave you.

definitely not ground breaking, but it differentiated you from the girls.

Lita was out in a thunderstorm of boos doing her “I don’t think y/n deserves the championship because i’m on the Untertaker’s team” shtick.

the crowd was heavily booing her and she called them “a field of cows” which made them boo even louder.

but the hate train stopped the moment your music began, their saviour is here.

chants of “SAVE US Y/N!” drowned everything including your theme. you stood right in front of Lita holding your title up high as your noses almost touched. you pushed her away from you before a referee quickly separated you two.

you’re handed a microphone, “I didn’t come by myself” you began, “I brought one of my favorite superstars” you smile.

as soon as Chyna’s theme played the crowd went ballistic.

everyone knew Lita was fucked. triple threat be damned, this was your first title defense, you were obviously going to retain it.

“that’s unfair! you’re two and I’m one!” Lita panicked, “and what about it?” Chyna asked making the crowd cheer. “sweetheart, don’t worry about this being and two on one, yeah you’re gonna get beat up, but it’s a triple threat, it is fair” you say.

you hand the referee your belt and the bell is quickly rung.

this was a “Match of The Year” candidate if not the winner, you three put on over thirty minutes of world class wrestling. all of you coming out looking good, Chyna was able to show her incredible strength and power, Lita stunned the crowd with her high rope spots and daring act, and you showcased the heart of wrestling that is your technical ability and grace in the ring.

you won the match, pinning Chyna for the 1,2,3. Chyna held up your hand along with the referee, you both wanted to shake Lita’s hand, but you couldn’t since she was on The Undertaker’s team, but the crowd gave her what she deserved as the chanted all three of your names.

you couldn’t even make it back to your locker room without your legs feeling like jelly, that was your fault. you should’ve stayed hydrated after coming from the hospital.

you quickly fall back onto your sofa, breathing hard. you close your eyes momentarily but you open them again when there’s a knock on your door, “hey” you look to your left, it was Hunter.

you hum, Hunter was holding a flower bouquet as he walked in. “you look tired” he says sitting besides you, you hum again. “y/n? are you okay?” he asked, you rest your head on his shoulder. “y/n?”

your eyes fluttered open and you face him for a second, you get up and you’re immediately hit by a wave of dizziness. Hunter gets up and holds you up properly, “y/n? talk to me, are you okay?” he asks. you point towards the door, you wanted to get some water, or anything drink.

“I n-need, I-…”

“what? what is it?” Hunter asks, you couldn’t finish what you were saying, your eyes shut one last time and you fell back against Hunter, passing out.

Hunter was panicking horribly, he held you against him and rushed out to the nurse’s office.

“god, what am I gonna do with you?”

[rawiswhore]

Scott Hall x Fem Reader- "What's New, Pussycat (Doll)?"

2002 would be one helluva year for the professional wrestling world.

The former World Wrestling Federation now changed its name to World Wrestling Entertainment, all thanks to the World Wildlife Fund also going by the abbreviation WWF.

The World Wildlife Fund has existed since the 1960's, why didn't they fight for the World Wrestling Federation's abbreviations during the 80's and 90's?

Despite that 2 other pro wrestling companies, WCW and ECW, went out of business in 2001, another new wrestling company known as TNA (Total Nonstop Action) has made its debut in 2002, giving the WWE competition.

Speaking of WCW, the NWO, arguably the most iconic wrestling faction of all time, the wrestling faction that would increase WCW's ratings and make the WWF want to climb for ratings again, have now reformed in 2002, however, they were mostly a mere shell of their former selves.

The epitome of a certain NWO member that was a mere shell of his former self was Scott Hall, otherwise known as Razor Ramon when he was in the WWF, who was killing himself with alcohol.

By the end of 2002, Scott Hall left the WWE due to his alcoholism.

You're both happy and sad he's leaving the WWE, even though you won't have moments with him in the WWE, you're glad he is getting help, as well as this...

Before the Pussycat Dolls became an oversexualized, best selling girl group, they originally started off as a burlesque act.

A burlesque act that not only brought burlesque back to the 21st Century, but featured female celebrities in this act and had women performing burlesque but not taking their clothes off.

Some female celebrities who have been Pussycat Dolls include Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, Paris Hilton, Kim Kardashian, Charlize Theron, Carmen Electra, Gwen Stefani, Christina Applegate, there was even a moment in "Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle" where they performed as Pussycat Dolls.

You were a female celebrity who got popular in the World Wrestling Federation, you were even the most popular woman in the WWF during the late 90's, surpassing Sunny, Chyna and Sable, and you had left the WWF in the year 2000.

You made a few guest appearances in the WWF/E from 2000 to 2002, but you were barely in the WWF/E during those years.

Of course, you had to jump on the Pussycat Dolls bandwagon, how could you not?

You even asked a few WWE divas like Stacy Keibler, Trish Stratus and Torrie Wilson if they would like to be Pussycat Dolls, which you're sure they would love to, especially Stacy.

Sable probably wouldn't mind being a Pussycat Doll too.

Scott Hall has always been a ladies' man, even during his Razor Ramon days, and even Razor Ramon's character was a ladies' man too.

He had a crush on you since you were a ringrat, and you've had a few affairs with him.

He knew about the Pussycat Dolls burlesque act, which already gave him a stiffy, but when he heard how you're performing in the Pussycat Dolls burlesque show, he had to see you.

On his birthday at the end of 2002, when he left the WWE, he attended a Pussycat Dolls burlesque show and sat front row, eagerly awaiting you.

Scott sent you an email about how he was attending a PCD show and it was his birthday, that made you so happy, and you had a surprise from him.

As the first few bass notes began playing to Peggy Lee's "Fever", you had strolled down the stage dressed in a black bra and matching swishy micro miniskirt with matching black boots that reached slightly below your knees, your fingers wrapped around a microphone.

When Scott attended this show, he was so tempted into pulling his cock out and masturbating, but he didn't want a Pee Wee Herman situation where he'd get arrested for masturbating in public.

Your eyes found Scott sitting front row in the audience, wearing an NWO shirt so you can probably recognize him.

Deep down inside, you lit up seeing him, but you were trying to contain yourself from getting too overexcited.

You grinned from ear to ear seeing him, your eyes were looking at him.

His eyes were glued to you, even though he wanted to look at some of the other women on stage as well.

As you walked on stage to the bass notes, you moved the microphone you were holding to your lips, and some other sexy, scantily clad women were strutting with you on the stage.

Scott's penis was rising up more and more as you walked towards him, although his jeans interfered his erection.

"Never know how much I love you" you crooned while looking at Scott. "Never knew how much I care"

You were trying to sound and look as sexy as possible whilst you sauntered up to him, you were singing this song to him, a song that describes how you feel about him.

He had a grin on his face as you walked up him, his pants were feeling tighter as you were approaching him.

When you got close enough to him, you put your fingers under his chin and slightly lifted his chin.

"When you put your arms around me" you sang as you looked at him. "I get a fever that's so hard to bear"

Although, you don't have any arms around you right now, and you aren't putting your hand on your forehead and arching your head back like you really do have a fever.

"You give me fever" you expressed, his legs were now in between your legs, where you began to swirl your hips and ass in a 360 degree angle to the song as you lowered your lap to his lap.

"When you kiss me, fever when you hold me tight" you sang as you sat and straddled his lap, although he didn't kiss you or wrap his arms around you.

"Fever!" you chirped "In the morning, fever all through the night"

When you sang the last line, you leaned into the side of his face, smiling and grinning at him.

"You can touch me if you want" you told him "Papi"

That really got him, and he perked up in more ways than one when heard you say it's okay to touch him, even more so that you called him "Papi".

As the bass notes played, you began to roll and gyrate your pelvis forward onto his lap, which made his eyes look down at your lap grinding and rolling up on his lap.

You can feel his erection poking and protruding through his jeans, and he grinned as you gave him this lapdance, biting his lower lip.

Scott might not be as sexy as he was back in the 90's, but he still is pretty damn hot.

How cute was he in NWO in '02 when he had that rag tied on top of his forehead?

You're tempted into grabbing the collar of his shirt and tearing it apart a la Hulk Hogan, so you can run your hands and fingers on his chest and through his chest hair, but nah.

Since you said it was okay to him to touch you, one of his hands was behind your ass, where his fingers gave you a squeeze of one of your ass cheeks.

Some of the backup dancers saw him grab your ass, they could nearly spread ear to ear smiles, although some probably think he's some pervert trying to grab you.

You then tried rotating your body around where now your back was pressing on his torso, lifting one of your legs over both of his legs and turning your body around.

You spread your legs wide open while you sat on his lap, much to his dismay he couldn't see your legs wide open, though you began to roll and grind your ass vertically up his crotch.

"Sun lights up the daytime" you sang, placing one of your hands on the side of his face while your head was turned and looking at him. "Moon lights up the night"

When you sang this, your hand on the side of his face slowly caressed down one of his cheeks (on his face), feeling the fuzzy facial hair on his face as your hand went down.

Your ass didn't just roll up his crotch, but your hips also swayed horizontally back and forth on his genitals, and you also began to sink your body down to the floor lower and lower, your back touching his torso.

"I light up when you call my name" you sang "And y'know I'm gonna treat you right"

You turned your body around and looked at him when you sang "y'know I'm gonna treat you right".

"Y'give me fever" you sang as you began to slowly walk around Scott, putting your hand on his chest and making that hand brush from his chest to his arm, where it turned and swerved to his back.

His eyes were looking at you as you walked around him.

"When you kiss me, fever when you hold me tight" you added, your hand sliding down below his shoulder down his chest.

His eyes looked at that hand sliding down his chest, and he can feel the touch of your hand over his shirt.

"Fever!" you exclaimed, although you didn't try to shout that in his ear. "In the mornin', fever all through the night"

He's been tempting to pull his wallet out and give you a dollar.

To hell with you, you're giving him fever!

He doesn't just want you, he wants some of those other Pussycat Dolls all over him, rolling their ass and crotch on his lap, having their hands all over him.

"Happy birthday" you whispered in his ear, giving him a kiss on the side of his face, which left your lipstick print on the side of his face.

You then slowly walked in front of him, where you bent your lower body down and started shaking your ass horizontally back and forth to the beat.

His eyes were staring at your ass and couldn't keep his eyes off of it.

You chose Peggy Lee's "Fever" to sing to him, because he gives you fever, not literally, but you do lust over him.

Later on after this performance, you sang Happy Birthday to him, and you actually invited him back to a hotel room, where you performed a striptease and lapdance for him and had some birthday sex with him, giving him a taste of your icing as well as his.

You actually have given a few famous professional wrestlers like Shawn Michaels, Triple H, Raven, Christian and Rob Van Dam lapdances and sang to them when you were a Pussycat Doll, you even gave Raven, Christian, Shawn and RVD lapdances for their birthday and sang to them at the PCD burlesque show.

You also asked some famous celebrity women who were Pussycat Dolls as well as just PCD dancers if they ever watch wrestling, and how you were giving these famous wrestlers lapdances.

Some of them want to sing and give lapdances to the Rock, arguably the biggest pro wrestling star of the early 2000's.

John Cena, Batista and Randy Orton were up and coming wrestlers in 2002 that had yet to become famous like they eventually would.

You even did a Pussycat Dolls routine in the WWE in 2002, where you wore lingerie whilst some Pussycat Dolls burlesque dancers danced behind you in the ring while you were singing a song.

In 2003, you were completely back in the WWE again, and you sang some of the songs you sang as a Pussycat Doll on WWE shows to Triple H and Shawn Michaels, as well as dressed as a Pussycat Doll.

_____________________________________________________________

I didn't think of writing this fanfic today considering last week I wrote a fanfic where the fem reader gives a lapdance to Raven, but I typed it anyway since I planned it.

[askauradonprep]

For the wrestling AU - who would you all say is the greatest wrestler of all time?

* Obligatory disclaimed that any mentions of a wrestler refer to their in-character personas and should not be read as an endorsement of anything they’ve said or done IRL.

Mal: Oh, wow - that’s a good question. I’m going to say The Undertaker. He’s done so much and been in so many iconic moments over the years, it’s gotta be him right? I mean, he’s been wrestling for like 30 years so. He’s gotta be good at something, right?

Uma: I’m gonna say Chyna. First woman in the rumble, first to win men’s championships in the WWE, and all of that when she was in the strip match filled wasteland that was the Attitude Era? Respect. Chyna was an OG.

Freddie: I was gonna say ‘Taker too. He’s been there for a long time and he’s one of the scariest men to ever step foot in that ring. I definitely loved watching him whenever we could get WWE on the Auradon News Network. 

Celia: I think it was Undertaker too. He’s always been my favourite wrestler and he’s won like a million championships. And he always comes back! I was so sad when I thought he wouldn’t after Mania 33, but he did. 

Jay: Wow, that’s a tough one. I’m gonna say either Stone Cold Steve Austin or Bret Hart. They kinda made wrestling in the 90s y’know? And Bret Hart’s a good leader. I love watching Stone Cold do something dumb that you know he’s gonna get arrested for, but I also love watching Bret Hart. He retired without injuring anybody you know? I wish I could do that. Best there was, best there is, best there ever will be, right? I think I have to give it to Bret Hart just for that one.

Evie: Who IS the greatest or can I say who WILL BE the greatest when her career is over? Because I definitely think it WILL be Charlotte Flair when she’s done. She’s only just started a few years ago and she’s already done so much! Matches of the Year, a pay per view win streak, 10 championships - what more could a girl want? Until she finishes though, I’m going to say it’s Ric Flair. He’s one of the most iconic wrestlers in the world and he was crucial in building our industry. I don’t think wrestling would be as big as it is without him. Yeah, I know, big Flair fan here. Woo! *giggles*

Carlos: Mark Henry! Man, c’mon. He’s the World’s Strongest Man. He might not have a bunch of titles, but you know when he walks in whoever he fights is in trouble. He’s funny too! Every time he starts making jokes, I crack up. I love Mark Henry.

Harry: Besides me? Tch! It’s Shawn Michaels. Everybody knows that. He’s one of the greatest wrestlers of all time and probably the biggest from forever ago.

Jay: Why am I not surprised that when I say Bret Hart, you say Shawn Michaels?

Harry: Because I have good taste?

Jay: Sure. That’s it.

Gil: Um, I’m gonna say Mark Henry, because he’s one of my favourites. He’s really strong and he’s really funny. 

Ben: I’m going to say Bret Hart too. Not just because he’s one of my favourites, but because he worked really hard at being a wrestler his entire career. He only missed one show he was booked for, he never hurt anybody, and he just cares a lot about the business. Which, I guess is why he’s one of my favourites. What can I say? I like the Harts. Bruno Sanmartino would be a great case too.

Chad: Uh, Triple H? Hello? Nothing else would have happened without him. He was the leader of D-Generation-X, he created NXT which is where everyone else came from. We’re all just waiting for him to take over, admit it.

Lonnie: I was going to say ‘I hope we haven’t met them yet’ because, really, wrestling would be pretty boring if we’d already seen the greatest wrestler who’ll ever exist. But...I think I know who I want to pick now. Her ring name was Minerva, and she was the first World Women’s Champion back in the 1890s. That was before there was even a MEN’S world championship. We didn’t get that until 1905! I can’t imagine a wrestling industry without world championships, can you? And she really hasn’t gotten the credit she deserves for that. Everyone thinks it started with Mildred Burke, but that’s not true. Every wrestler out there should know Minerva’s name but we don’t. We really don’t and I think that’s sad. She deserves so much better for her legacy. If I had my way, we’d have her name and her face everywhere - like the Minerva Memorial Battle Royale at Wrestlemania? We should know her. So that’s who I’m voting for.

Jane: Oh! Uh, I don’t know who I’d pick really. Maybe Sara Del Ray?

Chad: Who, the trainer lady?

Jane: Yeah! ‘Cause she trained most of the new wrestlers at WWE and stuff. I think she deserves credit for that. That’s lots of good wrestlers she helped forward. That’s a lot for the industry, y’know?

Audrey: I think it’s The Rock. Everybody knows who he is, even outside of wrestling. Everything he ever said made money for the industry and got attention for it. It’s definitely The Rock.

Jordan: The Miz. I mean, come on, that guy’s great. He’s been a solid main event level talent for 10 years, set records for his title numbers, he’s just a really solid wrestler all around and he’s done it for forever. I’m a Shawn Michaels girl too though so if he wins, I wouldn’t complain.

Ally: Lita. She was the coolest woman on tv for the Attitude Era and I think she’s still been incredible. She’s important for every girl who watches wrestling. And she’s a lot of fun to watch.

CJ: Kairi Sane. ...What? Oh was I supposed to say more? Well, she’s one of the only two wrestlers I care about watching so I guess that says it all, huh? 

Aziz: I mean, Kurt Angle’s an Olympian? And he came back from breaking his neck twice. You gotta give him props for that. And he’s one of the most decorated and he’s in TWO halls of fame. WWE and TNA. So, I’m gonna say Kurt Angle.

Herkie: Kurt Angle is great, but I’m gonna say Shinsuke Nakamura. That guy is so talented and I can’t understand why anyone would waste him. His stuff in New Japan? In NXT even? Absolute legend. 

Maddy: Ric Flair. He’s one of the most talented heels ever. The dirtiest player in the game. I respect that. 

Ginny: Well, I’d say it’s Randy Savage. He was a savage in the ring and on the mic. What more can you ask for? 

Harriet: I’d argue it’s Batista. He’s one of the most decorated champs and the longest reigning World Champ. And what can I say? I can relate to living somewhere rough when you were younger and the ego kind of reminds me of certain children I know.

Harry: Who?

Harriet: ...You’ll figure it out. 

Ruby: Well, I think it’s Rey Mysterio. He’s definitely one of the greatest wrestlers of all time anyways. If not for everything he’s done in the ring, then for all the great wrestlers he’s inspired - both as lucha wrestlers and as aerialists. He’s the greatest high flyer in the world. 

Anxelin: I want to say Eddie Guerrero. He was incredibly talented and would do anything it took. He was resourceful and crafty and I’ve always tried to be like that in the ring. I’m generally so straight laced that I know how hard it can be to act like that, so I have a lot of respect for Mr. Guerrero. And, well...him and Rey Mysterio were friends. Ruby is my sister. I would be lying if I said I didn’t see something in that connection. 

Yi-Min: I am not familiar with most of the wrestlers my colleagues on the roster have mentioned. From the promotions I am familiar with, I believe it is Ho Ho Lun. He is extremely talented and if he ever comes to America for a longer period of time, I believe he would become extremely popular and successful. 

Arabella: Jeff Hardy. He’s always been the cooler Hardy brother, wrestling wise in my opinion. He’s not afraid of anything. He’ll mess everybody up. So I’ve gotta say Jeff Hardy. 

Vote Tally

Undertaker: 3 (Mal, Freddie, Celia)

Chyna: 1 (Uma)

Bret Hart: 2 (Jay and Ben)

Ric Flair: 2 (Evie and Maddy)

Mark Henry: 2 (Carlos and Gil)

Shawn Michaels: 1 (Harry)

Triple H: 1 (Chad)

Minerva: 1 (Lonnie)

Sara Del Ray: 1 (Jane)

The Miz: 1 (Jordan)

Lita: 1 (Ally)

The Rock: 1 (Audrey)

Kairi: 1 (CJ). 

Kurt Angle: 1 (Aziz)

Shinsuke Nakamura: 1 (Herkie)

Randy Savage: 1 (Ginny)

Batista: 1 (Harriet)

Rey Mysterio: 1 (Ruby)

Eddie Guerrero: 1 (Anxelin)

Ho Ho Lun: 1 (Yi-Min)

Jeff Hardy: 1 (Arabella)

Mal: Ha! Told you guys it was Taker. 

Freddie: We didn’t need to be told, but yeah. Yeah, it is.

[chyna9]

You Can Call Her Joanie: Wrestling’s Fine Chyna

Even if you’ve not yet fallen under the spell of the sports entertainment juggernaut known as the World Wrestling Federation®, odds are still good that you’ve encountered its raven-haired female superstar Chyna. In the past few years, the sinewy seductress has surfaced on talk shows and sitcoms, at award ceremonies and at the newsstand. She even hosts her own Chyna Fitness video, if you’re optimistic enough to think that anything but a miracle could help the rest of us look like that.

But this is undeniably Joanie Laurer, the intelligent, introspective, 30-year-old alter ego of the smack-talking, manhandling wrestler, taking a seat beside me in the empty auditorium of Milwaukee’s Bradley Center a few hours before a packed house will witness a live performance of TNN’s Raw Is War. And Joanie Laurer is not who you might expect. There is no arguing that that body is an anatomical masterpiece, but in person the woman doesn’t seem so scary. Instead you notice perfect teeth, flawless skin and gray-green eyes freshly enhanced by the WWF’s makeup crew. And she is supremely comfortable publicly setting her onscreen persona aside.

“Actually I prefer it, because that’s who I am,” Laurer says. “There are identity crises for the fans and [also] amongst the talent, I think. There are some people that put themselves in a certain position where they feel that if they break character too much, that will affect the person who is going to buy the next Pay-Per-View to see what happens to them — and that affects them financially and professionally. It’s all intertwined, and so sometimes that line is very difficult to break. For me it’s a choice I made ahead of time. I can’t live my life like that. I have to be separate.”

Feeling at home in her own skin is a new sensation for Laurer. She was raised in Rochester, New York, one of three siblings who endured horrific neglect and abuse at the hands of troubled parents. Though she excelled at academics, earning a U.N. scholarship to Spain as a teen and blazing through college in less than three years, the youngest Laurer did not aspire to the workaday world. She dabbled in a host of oddball occupations that included fronting a band, performing singing telegrams, working for a telephone sex hotline and belly dancing. If it got her some attention, she was willing to give it a go.

“Having my childhood be that way gave me a tremendous drive,” says Laurer. “I felt that I had a lot to prove and I was starving for attention and I did what I had to do to be a part of the spotlight. The question that always really pops in my mind is why my sister never really felt that way or why my brother never really felt that way — why it was so necessary for me to become successful in the entertainment field. To really be unique and set apart from everyone else instead of blending in. Whereas my brother and my sister really craved normality in a family setting, I craved completely the opposite.”

Still, the realization that she was getting nowhere fast led Laurer back to her sister’s New Hampshire home, where she found a job selling beepers and haunted the gym. Rebuffed both as an actress and as a fitness competitor for being too “hard,” Laurer refused to give up on finding a way to combine her impressive physique and desire to perform. She wound up at the wrestling school of legendary grappler Walter “Killer” Kowalski, where her fearlessness and quick-study skills caught the eye of alumnus Paul Levesque, who was making a name for himself as the WWF’s Hunter Hearst Helmsley. Along with the federation’s crown prince, Shane McMahon, Levesque championed Laurer’s 1998 debut in the sports entertainment big leagues. She was given a deceptively dainty moniker and the role of buffed-up bully amid the blond, busty china dolls in the women’s locker room — and in no time, Laurer created a one-woman dynasty, making Chyna a flirtatious femme fatale who could also hold her own against the men in the wrestling ring. She’s even the first woman in WWF history to earn the league’s coveted Intercontinental title.

And she knows what you might be thinking about that. To the folks who dismiss pro wrestling as a script-driven hoax, Chyna offers a refreshingly no-nonsense response. “Yeah, what we do is ‘fake,’” she says, “but it’s like any job position. It’s like someone telling you ‘I’m going to give you this title and you have to be credible in that title, and make all the fans believe that you can hold that title and you can fight these guys who want the title from you. And you can be a spokesperson for the company and do all these interviews and talk shows and be able to represent the company on that level.’ It was a reward to me. Our company has levels just like any other job.”

With success in the WWF securely in her grasp, Laurer felt compelled to exorcise some personal demons as zealously as she exercised her body. She underwent a few cosmetic surgeries, for which she makes no apology. “When you have a very fit or maybe muscular woman out there, they’re portrayed one way,” she muses. “So you either have the ultrafeminine woman who’s the sex kitten, or you have this woman who, if she has force or opinion or a fit body type, all of a sudden she is cast as a very butch, hard he-man. And it’s so opposite of what I am! I am a lady with muscle. I had a harder body and I needed some boobs to make me more feminine just like any other woman out there. Do I condone a 16-year-old going out there and getting a pair of breasts because she wants hers to be as big as her friends’, ’cause the guys are looking at them? Absolutely not!”

And with the WWF’s blessing, Laurer revisited the entertainment industry, which had previously labeled her too tough for TV. This time she was welcomed with open arms, acing a recurring role on NBC’s 3rd Rock From The Sun and becoming the darling of the talk- and award-show circuits. And with her proud, hard body on its November 2000 cover, Playboy enjoyed its best-selling issue in more than a decade. “All the things that were considered to be extreme negatives at one point in my life have now overturned and are these really unique positivities,” Laurer points out. “So I appreciate that!”

In January, Laurer unveiled her autobiography If They Only Knew, a tell-all she hopes will help wrestling fans and detractors alike get to know the woman behind the diva. The book unflinchingly addresses her difficult early years and the struggle to accept her body and herself. But it also allows Laurer to have some fun, entertaining readers with her love of all things girlie, her future aspirations and her personal relationships with other WWF superstars. She fully expects her parents to try to cash in on the book’s success with the help of unscrupulous media sorts, but she prefers to focus her energies on getting the book made into a film. With typical drive, Laurer would be perfectly willing to take on roles on both sides of the camera.

“Being able to do something like that would be an incredible learning process,” she says, “to learn about the movie industry … what really goes into directing and producing. I’ve been on the opposite end, but I’ve never been in the director’s chair.”

There’s one more pending film project on which she has her eye — costarring with Arnold in the next sequel to The Terminator. “Three years ago people used to say to me, ‘Describe the character of Chyna,’ and I used to go, ‘Well I think that Chyna is the Wonder Woman 2000 and she is the Terminator 3.’ And then a couple years later you have this role of a female Terminator coming along and I thought ‘I wanna do that!’ Because there’d be nobody else who’d be as qualified as me. And I believe that. I think there has been a real female action hero — a credible female action hero — that we’re missing out there!”

For now, the credible female wrestler has found a happy home under the auspices of the World Wrestling Federation. “We’re now WWF Entertainment,” she says, “and with the WWF, I’ve done my book. With the WWF, I’ve done my video. And I don’t see why, with the WWF, I can’t do movies and then come right back here and keep doing what I do. I think that I am one of the very few people in this company that has an immense crossover ability. I don’t know exactly what I am going to do in the next couple years, but I know really I am either in the middle or I’m just getting started!”

[leaveharmony]

** this got mad towards the end and it wasn't a targeted sort of mad at anyone in particular so much as a tired & probably-stemming-from-always-having-thing-I-enjoy-and-the-way-I-engage-with-it belittled sort of mad.  And as my father has always taught me, having or expressing emotions is shameful and wrong, so sorry.

Idk I think it's like....harder for me to cast judgement RE: ~cheating scandals~ or w/e because it goes back to it all being completely theoretical to me. No one's ever, face to face, at any time in any way expressed any kind of romantic interest in me whatsoever, I've never been in a relationship of any kind.  It hasn't come up, and that's fine.  Whether this is a case of you cannot miss what you've never had or whether I'm just like....a broken empty vessel for whom the yearning for human contact has gone beyond recall or desire, I dunno, and it doesn't concern me.  This isn't a pity me statement or an uwu secret crush notice me statement, I literally don't care at this point and tbh can't remember ever having done so.

Probably my oldest friend at this point, she....like as long as I've known her she's dated married men almost exclusively (and this started when we were both in highschool, when she was screwing around w/ her married english teacher - something I now understand was shocking predatory behaviour and probably statutory rape besides, but she does not acknowledge it as such so bring it up isn't my place).  She's been seeing the current one for at least three years now, I think, and he's married.  It's certainly an uncomfortable thing, and god knows I don't believe he could possibly think much of her or his wife if he's been doing this for so long and never once manned up and been honest or seriously considered ending his marriage.  But it's her life and we don't talk much anymore anyway, so I've never felt like it was my job or my place to be her therapist RE: holy shit what the fuck is wrong with you why do you do this to yourself and how could you do this to someone else?

Like full disclosure she started ‘seeing’ that english teacher when we were sort of puppy love internet-together (another long story but she wanted to or at least said she did and I sorta went along with it cos I didn't want to hurt her feelings...which of course, then it certainly seemed v. much like she didn't have many of, considering within a week she was having it off w/ someone else...again, this was a detached ‘Oh’ kind of moment, not really connected to any real hurt as she had instigated this and I hadn't really felt anything myself...it was upsetting in a sort of, ‘so this is what people do when they tell you they love you, that is disappointing but I guess life is not fiction’ kind of way but not in a ‘how could you, I love you’ kind of way.  As a first/only experience it could have gone better tbh, but it certainly gave me the right level of expectation afa being used & discarded when someone more convenient came along).

It's possible that most of the people I have ever known have just been fundamentally really bad at relationships and so I just sort of assume this is a normal thing; my father is an abusive shitbag and we're inescapably trapped with him, grandpa was a sort of...disinterested stick in the mud with a frightening temper for whom my grandmother gave up all her interests in sports and the outdoors because he did not share them.  Wabs never married, Tosh told me like she was expecting a pat on the back and a medal that she'd been faithful to her husband as he died of cancer 'even though she  ‘didn't have to be.’  And my instinctive reaction wasn't GOOD FOR YOU so much as it was “....what?!” but again...I didn't speak, because what the fuck do I know?  Maybe ppl run off and start seeing other ppl as soon as their partners get so much as a headcold all the time.

Ppl just sorta get abused and trampled and left and cheated on and discarded, or they do the same to others, and it just looks like a hell of a mess I'm well out of, tbh.  Which I guess is another reason...unless somebody's getting beat or otherwise abused, I feel like it's none of my business.  So honestly, “Tana slept around when he was single and one day some chick he canoodled with for like two months stabbed him for it” is filed under “Yeah that'll happen, thank god he didn't die” rather than “Hahahahaha karma amiright he totes deserved it, domestic abuse and attempted murder are hilarious when they’re directed at men who’re full of themselves!”

Nobody needs to tell me to have low fuckin' expectations for men, ok, I live under the boot of one of their idiot kings.  Tell me Tana fatshames his family for eating, tell me he gaslights them or acts like when they’re hurt or injured they’re making it up to personally inconvenience him, tell me they have to rigidly control their emotions around him to avoid setting off his violent temper, and ok.  Tell me he's a bigot, tell me he hits his family, tell me he hates women, tell me he's a rapist, ok.  But like...’he had a lot of sex and probably hurt people's feelings’ is not really high on my list of cardinal offenses b/c as far as I can tell, that's fucking everyone.  It isn't like he still does, it isn't like he's not tried to put it behind him and grow from it and be better.  It's practically his motto.   Why is ‘I acted in a shitty way but I'm trying to atone and I still look back and feel guilty about it’ only an admirable, affirming  thing to aspire to when it's a tumblr post & not when a guy is straight up saying it?  Which he has, on multiple occasions.  Can't change the past, can only try to learn from it.

At.  Least.  He.  Fucking.  Tries.

When has redneck george ever walked back his comments about gay ppl or his Islamophobia, when has Lesnar?  Beyond a token apology and chasing it w/ a dozen I'M NOT A RACIST THO interviews when has Hogan really acknowledged the depths of how he fucked up?  When did Warrior apologize for his vile bigotry, where's Elgin sincerely regretting being a fucking piece of shit dragging a rape victim's name through the mud?  Jericho's response to ‘hey maybe you shouldn't be advertising your cruise by saying there will be loads of bikini-clad women there available for you to ogle’ was essentially ‘are you triggered, bro, y so srys?’ and at no point did he objections seriously.  Orton never so much as thinks for two seconds before condemning BLM protesters or footballers who take the knee, AND he voted for Trump, but other than hollowly chanting that he's not a racist while blatantly doing things that are racist, silence.  Honma beat his girlfriend, Snuka murdered his partner, Austin smacked Debra around, Angle got stoned out of his mind and broke into his ex's apartment, X-Pac hit Chyna, exactly how often do they refer back to what happened, when did they apologize or express regret or even acknowledge any of it?  I mean I guess Benoit can't, what with the fucking suicide after he bashed in Nancy's skull and murdered his son.

Ppl have different things they can tolerate and forgive, is I guess my point, or at least one of them.  Which is fine!  I mean...I'd sure fucking side-eye anybody who writes any of the above a pass, but, I guess everybody's stories and reasons are different.

I like Tana.  I'm a fan of his.  Ok?  Like it probably sounds like I think he's a flawless angel crowned with light b/c compared to my fucking father, he IS.  It doesn't mean I'm being willfully blind to mistakes he's made or that I'm absolving him of every sin he's ever committed.  I think he's a good person and it's heartening and encouraging that he's in the world and if saying so without adding 18 asterisks about past behaviour and an disclaimer acknowledging all men as shit and all people as inherently flawed makes me a gullible childish ~fangirl~ than ok, I guess I am.  Everybody knows my tags for wrestling/wrestlers, which are there as much as a courtesy to anybody who needs to blacklist as they are a filing system for me (that’s why there’s a catch-all!  For ppl I haven’t thought up tags for yet or don’t intend to!), and tumblr savior is right there if me being silly about my favs in my own space bothers everybody so fucking much, god knows it wouldn't be the first time I set somebody cringing and they had to tune me out before they quietly dropped my ass like a particularly stupid puppy on a country road.  That I am a sloppy fawning emotional mess of untreated neurosis who hyperfixates on things & people who make me feel halfway hopeful for entire minutes at a time & gets stupidly overexcited about stuff isn't new information to me, so if you can't deal with that then... Well...sorry, honestly.  Like sincerely.  I know how I am and I try not to be but I can't help it sometimes when I like something.  Don't feel bad about leaving if you don't want to deal with it, cos I get it, honestly.  Have exactly zero (0) guilt feelings about it.  I’m a fundamentally repulsive creature, ppl have hard limits on how long they can put up with me, and so it has always been, and so it goes.

[pastelbatfandoms]

WWE Themed 20 Questions

1: all time favorite wrestler? least favorite wrestler ever? Triple H and John Cena.

2: favorite member of the current roster? least favorite member of the main roster? Male-Bray Wyatt Female-Alexa Bliss// Male-Kevin Owens Female-Bayley.

3: favorite member of the NXT roster? least favorite member of the NXT roster? I don’t know NXT well enough except for Asuka,Drew McIntyre,Eric Young  and Bobby Roode. I’m not a big fan of Aleister Black though. 

4: favorite tag team or stable past or present? D-Generation-X and The Hardy Boyz! Present would still be The Hardys,but also Breezango and The Shield. 

5: favorite Diva? least favorite Diva? I already said but all time would be Lita or Victoria and least…that’s hard because they all had good and bad qualities. I’d probably say Tori because while she could wrestle as soon as She became a Girlfriend to Kane and then XPac,she became just an accessory. 

6: favorite manager? Trish Stratus lol or Sensational Sherri. If we’re talking about GM’s I’d say Shane Mcmahon! 

7: favorite announcer? Lilian Garcia 

8: best and worst gimmick? I’m enjoying The Fashion Files with Breezango lately. worst I’d say when they had the clowns and Furrys. 

9: best ring gear-I always liked Lita,Candice Michelle,Chyna and Maryse’s. recently I still like Maryse’s,Sasha’s,Natalya’s and Alexa Bliss.

10: best and worst on the mic. The Rock,Stone Cold,Y2J,Kane,Bray Wyatt,The New Day ect  Female wise…I’d Say Trish and Stephanie. Worst-John Cena he’s too goddamn preachy but some of the stuff he says makes sense and he knows how to work a crowd so other than him,Randy Orton I think XD,Female-Lita,Becky Lynch,Alexa Bliss,The Bella Twins ect. 

11: favorite entrance music? Randy Orton’s,Naomi’s and Shane Mcmahon’s.

12: favorite catch phrase? Prbly all of The Rock’s lol

13: favorite couple? least favorite couple? Stephanie and Triple H of course! least-Maryse and The Miz (but I love them on Total Divas) 

14: favorite current story line? favorite past story line? Roman Reigns and Braun Stromans Fued. past-The Mcmahon Helmsley Era or The Trish and Stephanie Fued.  

15: favorite finishing move? Widow’s Peak,Chick Kick,Poetry in Motion,450 splash. 

16: favorite title belt? The Women’s title. 

17: ever been to a live show? tell us about it Yes I’ve been to three local one’s,they were really fun!

18: met anyone from the WWE? if you could meet anyone from the WWE who would you chose and why? Yes Edge and Terryn Terrell,If I had to pick one female and one male…Stephanie and Shane Mcmahon.  

19: how did you get into watching wrestling? When I was 12 my BFF att got me into watching it. 

20: anyone working for another wrestling company that you would like to see in the WWE? Lisa Marie Varon,Shannon Spruill,Velvet Sky and Angelina Love. All the males are already there except James Storm.

☆☆Bonus Questions☆☆

21: if you could have anyone (past or present) feud who would it be? OMG Trish vs Alexa. Alexa already reminds me of heel Trish. Presently I want Maria and Maryse to feud with there husbands XD 

22: favorite Pay Per View? Hell in a Cell and TLC

23: dream tag team? I wanted Dean Ambrose to Join The Wyatt’s when they were still a Family. Trish and Lita. 

24: dream couple? AJ Styles and Alexa Bliss

25: write your dream story line

26: if you were a Superstar or Diva what would your ring name be? Roxy

27: if you were a Superstar or Diva what would your entrance music be? I have no idea.

28: if you were a Superstar or Diva what would your gimmick be? Well She would date/Manage various Wrestlers,She’d be a mix of Tori and AJ Lee, in the ring she’d be more like Victoria though but her Personality and Style would also change depend on who she was with att. 

29: design you own ring gear-I really have no idea. something with pants though. 

30: if you were a Superstar or Diva what would your finishing move be? A move involving the ropes. 

31: favorite debut? Chris Jericho’s.

32: favorite feud past or present? Vince Mcmahon vs Stone Cold,Trish Vs Stephanie,Trish Vs Victoria. 

33: do you own any wrestlers shirts? which ones I have a Bray Wyatt one and a Dean Ambrose one also a Dean Ambrose hoodie. 

34: do you watch all the WWE shows? Just Smackdown and Raw,sometimes NXT.

35: if you made a sign for one of the wrestlers what would it say?

[kamizite]

Predictions and Rants. Wrestlemania 33 edition!!!

Sigh… what happened guys? If you watch the monthly podcast you know the theme of the brand split has been Smackdown has weak cards on Paper that Over perform and Raw has Strong cards on paper that underperform.  The Big joint PPVs have been decent some of them actually really good (Survivor Series) and some of them just okay (Royal Rumble).

So here we are… in Pointing Season and I have to say… I’m not feeling this years Wrestlemania. Will I still watch it?  Yeah probably but her is just a few thoughts and predictions on the upcoming card.

 Honorable Mention

 Luke Harper. As of right now he has not been entered in the Battle Royal and odds are he will be relegated to nothing or interference in the Orton/Waytt Main Event. Don’t worry Luke. I’ll be Sunday and we all will know what that really means. That you are Number 1 in our hearts.

The Smackdown Tag Team Championship The division was Dead after American alpha won Tag Team Turmoil. Ironcally that’s my favorite match type but the way the went about it just.. ug.  The SDTTD from the start has basically been NXT (Breezango individually, and Hype Bros. Vaudevillians, American Alpha, The Ascension, Rhyno and one of the Original NXTers Heath Slater)   w/ the Usos. With the exception of AA and the USO ever everyone else has been treated like Clown shoes before and after the brand split.  All that being said… they deserve a championship match at the biggest show of the year and to now be relegated as filler for the Battle Royal.

 The Precook

Alexa Bliss Vs. The World.  So if the punch line here was to have Naomi win the title in her home state… why did they give it to her at Elimination Chamber and had her surrender it the two weeks later?  Was that injury legit and they were playing it safe?  Would this “all available women on the roster” type hype better fit crowning a New Smackdown Women’s Champion at Mania then the one off Match with Becky and the shit show that followed? For that Matter, What is with the STILL “We aren’t sure what match we’re having” nonsense. Alexa deserves better than this, throw away make sure everyone get to play match. Becky Deserves better. Mickie Deserves better. The SDWD is not your filler match Danmit!  With that said, I look for Naomi or some unnamed as of yet participant to walk away.

 The Only Cruiserweights that Matter: Austin Ares vs. nEVILle Seriously.. with the possible exceptions of Jack Gallagher and THE (not A) Brian Kendrick is there any one else that matters? 205 live has been an unmitigated Disaster. The writing is horrible, they perform in front of a dead crowd after the main event of Smackdown, The Wrestling is good but the writing is shoddy. I really feels like 205 Live is better served doing it’s own thing, maybe from the NXT arena where you can get a small but enthusiastic group to help embrace these characters and will appreciate work rate. ALL that being said A Dub has returned and it’s good to see him and rightfully he’s the money match for the man that is single handedly trying to save this division.  I love Heel nEVILle. I also love that A dub is owning the crap out of being Precooked by saying that it just needed to be elevated and he’s the right guy for the job. This is the guy we needed when he debuted. On any other show I’d say the nEVILle retains so we can get a good story out of this but this is pointing season, A Dub is coming back from a pretty harsh injury and this is the show where fairytales come true. A Dub for the win.

“Has Everyone (But Luke Harper) gotten a turn to play?” Battle Royal can you tell I’m a little bitter about his exclusion from the show? Look this is an excuse to get everyone on the card. Winner it did not help Cesaro at 30, Didn’t Help  Big show at 31, and did nothing for A-Ron Corbi at 32. The fact that this battle Royal has Bruan Stowman who has been flying in the last six months and Sami freaking Zayn A.K.A. the best God dam worker on the card is criminal! CRIMINAL! I look for Stowman to win this but we’re all adults here. I don’t care, You don’t care, No body cares.

The Show Proper

In my last rant I talked about how the disrespect to Smackdown was just so apparent. A day removed from that rant, I feel even more strongly that Smackdown is being hamstrung because they are perceive in management as “The B show”. I bleed Smackdown Blue and I will always Rep for them as they are much better than the Trips and Steph show. But with that said let’s talk about

Good Brothers v. Shamsaro v. The Realest Jobbers in the Room (Competitive Lightbulb Changing Match for the Raw Tag team titles) At least the new day are in this match. I love the new day but I think they are just perfect operating as hosts and hopefully can go to smackdown and return to their heelish ways. So confession time. I thought the cop out of the Sheamus/Cesaro best of 7 series was weak sauce and I HATED the thought of them as a tag team mostly because Cesaro deserves a serious singles run. But I’m Always one to admit when I’m wrong and they have won me over. I even dig that Bourg Kick/Hart Attack Move they did a couple of weeks ago but then I’m a sucker for a Tag Team finisher.  I will Always Mark for gallows and Anderson and the E has seriously dropped the ball with them. I have to wonder if their storyline got wrecked when Finn went down with an injury and they had no clue what to do with them. You know what.. I’m also going to say it. I. HATE. Enzo and Cass. Mostly Enzo. His character is not a good person, he drags Cass down who was; months ago competing for the universal championship. He makes more trouble then he solves, and always talking about thing that I MOST CERTAINLY CAN TEACH ENZO! I CAN TEACH ALL THOSE THINGS IN YOUR MONOLOGUE! *ahem* Anyway.  The ladders is just a reason to make them the first match at mania. I’m sorry to say this but I think the Realest Jobbers In the Room are gonna walk away with their first Tag Team championship, if for any reason that this is the only match that Enzo and his no offense self can conceivably win.  

Dean Ambrose vs A-ron Corbi/Boring Crobin (take your pick) for the Intercontental Championship here’s a fun fact, the last PPV the IC belt was defended on was TLC In December with Miz and Dolph. Man remember all the hard work they put in to elevate that title after the brand split and should have rightfully been the main event of no mercy?  Also, I’m a Big dean Ambrose fan but why is it when he gets a singles belt does it suddenly not get defended. I mean he had to with the World Title but this is exactly what happened with his US title run. Again I love Ambrose, and I think this is going to be a great match. All joking aside Corbin has made himself interesting despite the writes booking him like a schmuck that couldn’t win a match against Dolph Ziggler with a broken neck (real thing that happened)  Now that they are booking him like a monster I’m interested in what he does and of course that’s when they relegate most of his stuff in the last three weeks to “Oh yeah this happened” segments between matches, talking smack, and the pay off last week where the match has been official. I think Baron is gonna walk away with the title here. He needs it for legitimacy. Plus the faces can’t win every match.

Good Friends, Better Enemies (Kevin Owens V. Chris Jericho for the US title.) This should have been for the Universal Championship. It really should have. Jericho is so good these days he’s gotten a dammed list over and with KO it was super entertaining to see them week in and out. Especially the After RAW shenanigans with the Undertaker I got to see live! I love the return to the intense prize fighter Owens and I think this match if gonna possibly be match of the night. Huh… I just realized.  Samoa Joe isn’t booked on the card.  That can’t be good for Larerell’s Favorite Wrestler. K.O. for the win and the title because this is going to become the important belt. More on that later.

Total Diva’s: The Match (Big Match John and Super Girl vs. The Marine and Mrs. The Marine for… reasons) confession time again. Last year I said the Miz needed to be a manager, that he just wasn’t cut out for Wrestling but would be a great mouth piece. It’s on youtube so I can’t act like I didn’t say it. I was wrong. I was so Wrong. The Miz has made me believe him. The Miz made the IC belt worth while. His Promos over the last 6 weeks with John Cena have been Straight Fire! (Sorry Dame Dolph Ziggler) I’m more invested in this match then any other on Smackdown’s side. Maryse was a good wrestler back in the Diva’s Era so I’m interested to see what she can bring to the table having been out of action so long. Nikki is serviceable in the ring I feel, I’m sure she has her fans. I’m not one of them but she works hard to put the best match she can and I really respect that. By all rights, Miz should… NEEDS to win this.  But it’s pointing Season and let’s be honest, You can’t Beat Super Man. Also look for John to Propose after the match. Just Sayin’.

Can someone please hold this Belt for more than 4 weeks!?! (Bailey v  Charlotte v Sasha Banks v Nia Jax Fatal Four way Elimination for the Raw Women’s championship) This feels less can everyone play but it illustrates a point. Stuff as many competitors in a Women’s Division match as you can. That’s a little harsh, I Realize but I mean.. would it Kill them to have a one on one match and put the other two in their own match? I’m just saying Smackdown’s Last PPV had three Women’s Matches. I’m a fan of all these Women, and I feel like Nia has been over looked in the division for a while if for the only reason as she feels like a Division Killer to me like Chyna, Awesome Kong, or Beth Phoenix was. Sahsa and Charolette  are always Awesome together and Throw Baily in the Mix and great stuff is bound to happen. As much as I want to say put it on Nia and settle down with the title swaps for a while, I think Bailey walks out because She is the epitome of a dream moment coming true.  

*sigh* We could have had Shawn (A.J. Styles Vs. Shane McMahon because Brock didn’t want to do it) I think it’s worse that Shawn said they offered him the match and he turned it down.  I mean. Michaels v. Styles?  Money.. just money all over. Not that I don’t Enjoy Shane-o-bump but this feels shoe horned in. I feel like when you have the best wrestler in the world you can find… you know… another wrestler for him to work with on the grandest stage of them all. That being said, Styles pulled good matchs out of Roman and Shane even in his 40’s is no slouch. But We’re all adults here. A.J. is winning. It is the only logical conclusion.

Seth Rollins vs Triple H in a Non-Sanctioned Match. There is a part of me, the part of me that will suspend my disbelief that worries that there is a nugget of truth in Rollins signing a Hold Harmless just so he doesn’t miss two straight manias. That being said, this is the logical conclusion to the turn that happened.. wow.. like three years ago. Pedigree vs (Less awesome looking) Pedigree.  You know, I know this is the Trips Vanity match and all buyt I really hope this is the last year for this because to a lesser extent I feel the same way about Rollins that I Do AJ. We could have had a better match with a full time worker here, but then when you on the Trips and Steph show and your facing Trips… I guess that’s as good as being in the world title match right? Right!?!  Anyway Trips wins with the help of Samoa Joe (he has the meats).

You don’t mess with a man’s Fries, You don’t mess with a Man’s Yard. (Roman Reigns Vs Undertaker for… the yard I guess?) So I said that Smackdown had 4 main card matches to Raw’s 6. Then I was corrected when someone pointed out that The Undertaker was a smackdown Talent so technically that’s 4.5 to 5.5.  Alright, so then… When was the last time Taker was on Smackdown? Before Survivor Series? Has this match had anything significant happen on Smack down like Roman showing up looking for Captain Black hat and Fog? No?  All of the buildup for this has been on Raw? My count still stands and that just makes me Angrier about the mistreatment of Team Blue. GOD I hope this is the end of the Roman Reigns Experiment. This needs to be His coming out party as a heel. I mean he’s main evented the last 2 wrestlemanias… and there’s a very good chance that since this is a “Crossbrand” Match with Taker that in order to not “show favoritism” to either brand that this ends up being the last match of the night. If they play this like Heel reigns finally having it with the cans and having his “The Rock joins the Nation” moment this could be pretty good. If they keep on with this “He’s So Polerizing” stuff.. this could be really bad.  I choose to be optimistic which means…. Roman win by cheating. Belee Dat!

Should Be the Main Event (Bray Wyatt Vs. Randell Q Orton for the WWE World Heavyweight Championship) The World Heavyweight Championship is the only True World Championship. It has the lineage. It doesn’t look Ridiculous. Randell Q Orton won the Royal Rumble which (at least in the last two years) Mean you are the Main event (read: Last match) of WrestleMania. Odds are it won’t be and I’ll be honest.. besides the reasons stated above, I’m not sure it deserves to be. It’s been a long boil to this point with Randy joining the wyatts driving a wedge between Bray and Luke, and then Double crossing bray and performing Arson.  And HE’S The good guy!  I mean in the last six week things have gotten… well weird. There was the aforementioned Arson skit which Ran… like ten minutes too long with all it’s creep cuts and transition and awkward pauses. We’ve had Bray rubbing dirt and ashes all over himself.  We’ve had his version of the Druid the uh… Rowans?  Sheeple?  I don’t know what to call them. But yeah that last week. And then Randel Q. Orton last night drive a Crusix.. or whatever they called it that was on fire into the ground where he burned Bray house down. So uh… yeah. I’m gonna ignore the obvious signs and say Bray wins this.  They want him to be the New Taker he needs a big win and really He’s the Face in this match.

Will Probably Be the Main Event (Cold Beer Vs Bork Lazer for the WWE Universal Championship of the World.) Back at Survivor Series, everyone blew they lids when Cold Beer won his match in like 2 minutes. My reactions was “Because of course he did. How did I not see that coming?  THAT, is the Goldberg Match.” It was a great way to build a Wrestlmania rematch AND get Bork out of his then plans to fight Shane-o-bump. It would be the match we deserved 13 years ago at Wrestlemania 20! It would heal that eyesore of a match! Then Goldberg Won the Universal Championship. Then I got REAL over this feud, REAL fast. Goldberg in his prime was not a long match kind of guy. Goldberg now has not been in the ring for more than 5 minutes of active match time. Brock’s matchs are Suxplex, suplex suplex, hope spot, suplex suplex suplex, f5. I do not have high hopes for this match. Add to the fact both these guys are part timers and are not going to be at Every Raw PPV, Ever Raw Show, and CERTIANLY not any House shows, this cheapens an already new belt with dubious credibility. It’s one of those Rare time the Belt actually takes away my interest in the match.  Regardless… this can only end in Brock getting his win back  and if the Plan’s are to be believed of a Roman v. Brock Main event at 34, There is a good chance he might hold that belt all year. Because you know… it did so much for the other title when Brock held, and didn’t defend it last time. Unless Finn win’s it back on Raw the night after.

And… Wow… that really got away from me.  So That’s my Rant/Prediction of Wrestlemania. I know I sound like I’m pretty cynical but once I am watching it I’ll totally be into it. Because I’m a mark and I’m proud of that.

Edited: for Clarity and because of course i missed all my spelling mistakes and probably still have missed some. Oh Well.

[ohnoitsthebat]

Renee Young or Beth Phoenix? Adam Cole or Kyle O'Reilly? Ambrollins or Ambreigns? Drew Mcintyre or Roman Reigns? 💕💕💕 (I'll stop blowing up your inbox now. Lmfao 💋)

BLOW UP MY INBOX, YAS GAWD. I really really do not mind!!!

Beth! No offense to Renee, but Beth was just amazing. I loved when I got back into WWE in 2007 and she was there. It was so nice to see a strong, fierce woman in the Women’s Division. I was really thrilled to see her, and she reminded me of Chyna, but more talented. I was sad when she stopped wrestling :( Let’s just say that Beth awakened a lot of things in me, lol. I had a very big crush.

THIS IS VERY UNFAIR. Both of them are crazy talented, but there’s something about Kyle that makes him endearing and adorable to me. I want to take care of Kyle and be sweet to him. And he’s a technical wrestler, so of course I’m biased. Also, he was with Davey Richards for a while, and Davey is one of my favorites.

Can I say both? I ship them both for different reasons. Ambreigns is hot, don’t get me wrong, and I would LOVE to see that, but Ambrollins was my OTP. I was obsessed with it, I wrote about it, RPd it, had numerous headcanons. So yeah, I’m Ambrollins trash.

DADDY DREW. That intensity, that accent, the wrestling, the whole package ( pun intended). But I mean, I’ll take both. (I know, I can’t choose. I’m so sorry!)

I LOVE YOU FOR ASKING ME THESE. 

[ambreiiigns]

wrestlemania predictions because i wanna see how much i nail

seth rollins vs brock lesnar: i really wanna say seth just because i'm tired of lesnar, and i do get the feel that he'll win it? just because he's the top guy right now and all the built up and all the merch about the beast-slayer i feel like it might be a hint at him winning, but i felt the same about finn so. i really don't know. i can't trust wwe anymore, wouldn't be surprised if they had lesnar win again. ugh

ronda rousey vs charlotte flair vs becky lynch: i of course REALLY want becky to win, but i feel like it's a pretty unpredictable situation? ronnie's such a favorite of the management that i can imagine wwe having her walk out with both championships, and charlotte's such a golden f*ckin girl i wouldn't be surprised if they had HER win. but boy oh boy would i be so damn mad. on the other hand, becky's gotten so popular they might JUST consider doing the right thing. if wwe wants to listen to the fans for once they'll have becky win. in any case, the winner takes rule is BULLSHIT

buddy murphy vs tony nese: honestly i'd be cool with both???? i'm feeling tony more and i'm hoping for tony tho

triple h vs batista: oh this is hard,,, i'm pretty sure they'll have hunter win but then again,,, maybe this match is just a set up for hunter to retire,,, i don't want him to lose or retire tho,,,,, and i feel like it's a bit early for him??? so i think he'll win????? hopefully?

kurt angle vs baron corbin: i'll start off by saying that at this point i doubt and REFUSE TO BELIEVE that it's really gonna be corbin but uh if it really is him i'm pretty sure kurt's gonna win. crobins screwed kurt over too much, this one gotta go to kurt, and also COME ON if they have kurt lose his final match it'd be just stupid

shane mcmahon vs the miz: a mcmahon who's also a heel losing at mania? HA funny. it's gonna be shane for sure

aj styles vs randy orton: oh this match is gonna be So Good i don't even CARE i can't imagine who's gonna win,,,,,, i don't even have a preference. it's gonna be so good who needs a winner

samoa joe vs rey mysterio: i want rey to add more gold to his collection but i also want joe to keep the gold after all the time it took him to get some,,,, fuck this is hard and i again don't really know,,, but i'm going with rey, not because i want it but because i think that's what's gonna happen. i'm rooting for joe a little bit more

bobby lashley vs finn bàlor: i don't even wanna talk about it. finn honey i'm so sorry. bob's boring and basically a brock lesnar who shows up every week. finn needs to win, next

roman reigns vs drew mcintyre: this is basically roman's comeback match OF COURSE my big boy's gonna win it!!! it's a welcome back baybay!!!! i'm also hoping that dean shows up in some way i'm really sad don't @ me

boss n hug connection vs divas of doom vs the iiconics bs tamina and nia jax: OK WOW let's just rule nattie and beth out cause beth's probably just making an appearence like lita and trish in october, she's NOT gonna be around much longer or enough to defend it next month. i also don't see bayley and sasha keep the championships, i DON'T want nia and tamina to win, and i think that the most obvious and FAIR thing to do is to have the iiconics win and bring the belts to smackdown

daniel bryan vs kofi kingston: they'll probably keep fucking with kofi and have him lose, but with the way fans got behind him recently i doubt it??? and also hopefully hope he'll win so???? please vince

the usos vs the bar vs ricochet and aleister black vs shinsuke and rusev: ok so if any of the amazing-wrestlers-turned-tag-teams aka ricochet and aleister or shinsuke and rusev win i'll fuckin fight cause it's pathetic and unfair. unfair for the other REAL tag teams who can't get anything done, and unfair for the four of them cause they deserve SO much better. i'm also sick of the bar at this point and the usos are my favorite, so i'm hoping for them

the revival vs zack ryder and curt hawkins: ok now i LOVE zack and if this is what it takes to finally give him a push, PLEASE let's do it. but at the same time i don't want the revival to lose the championships cause they're basically the uh best tag team in town rn, and the tag team who deserves it more than anyone else and it's a shame how long it took for them to even win it. but ALSO what a better day for curt to break his losing streak than wrestlemania? i can honestly see zack and curt walking out as champions, but i'm bot sure i want it

andré the giant memorial battle royal: i want either andrade or mustafa to win it, though i have this really bad feeling telling me it will be braun,,,, dear lord no

wrestlemania women's battle royal: so this isn't called chyna memorial battle royal? shameful. i honestly am not really feeling anyone in particular for this?? i want asuka Just Because, and if that doesn't happen maybe sonya or micki or ruby? i don't know !! winning it seems pretty pointless anyway, which sucks for my girls. but if it gives any championship challenge rights, let it be asuka for god's sake

[placetobenation]

There’s a lot to cover with Beth Phoenix. This might be a long one. She packed an extraordinary amount into her six year career, playing every conceivable role, fighting men and women, inventing angles, being a workhorse, and having more legitimately great matches than any other woman of the Divas Era. She also had more of my personal dream matches than any other wrestler.

When I say dream matches, I mean right from the word go. Beth lowkey debuted in 2006 at the arse end of the Trish Stratus vs. Mickie James storyline, for reasons. Her first match was a tag opposite Victoria and within two seconds of them touching I IMMEDIATELY needed all the Beth vs. Victoria matches. The good news is this wish was granted the week after. The bad news is that Beth broke her jaw in it and disappeared and there were never any more Beth vs. Victoria matches.

Those first main roster appearances were merely a tease, both of Beth herself and of the feeling of wanting her to wrestle everyone in sight.

A full year later she returned with A CAPE, the Glamazon persona and a monster heel push to match, steamrolling the roster on her way to beating Candice Michelle for the title. The Candice feud is amazing. A-MA-ZING, particularly for the way that Beth went into it as a bit of a stiff, and came out of it as a confident, dominating monster, completely transformed. Candice deserves all the credit in the world for that, but that’s another song.

Once she put the pieces together, Beth was a fucking force. She had unbelievable timing, knowing exactly when to let someone run around her and when to cut them off, and when she cut them off she was merciless. BAM clothesline! BAM backbreaker! BAM mid-air catching slingshot backdrop driver from HELLLLLLLL!

She brutalized smaller girls like Maria, Candice and Kelly Kelly. She had a long-running rivalry with Mickie James where they amassed a laundry list of killer matches. Mickie was her perfect foil, a hard working babyface who could push her to the limit before being caught and splatted. And Beth did splat her, and everyone else. She was dominant as all get out.

And then she looked at Melina sideways.

Beth Phoenix Dream Match Alert.

Now Melina, once again, was the baddest motherfucker on the planet. Her and Beth were both heels but after a three-way with Mickie at the end of 2007 I IMMEDIATELY needed all the Beth vs. Melina matches. Then one day Melina cost Beth a chance to regain the title which she had just lost to Mickie in an EPIC match in London. Beth was understandably pissed, and paid her back a week later by walking out on their tag team match and then chewing Melina out backstage for good measure.

This was TERRIFYING. Beth was banging on and Melina was getting hotter and hotter and I was fearing for Beth’s ENTIRE life. Melina finally snapped and hit her but Beth just picked her up above her head and DRILLED her into a locker over and over until she stopped moving and was probably dead.

THIS WAS TWICE AS TERRIFYING. Beth had dominated all the women for almost a year, but absolutely nothing she did was as scary as taking the legitimately frightening and mass murderous Melina and just annihilating her to death like it wasn’t nothin’.

From there they engaged in basically one big brawl for the next month. They would scrap constantly and crowds would be eating it up and chanting “LET THEM FIGHT!” and it was all so completely violent and awesome. So they let them fight at the One Night Stand PPV, I Quit, where Beth literally had to bend Melina into unnatural and suspiciously pretzel-like shapes before she said the words. If you can find me a better heel vs. heel match in company history, bring it to me. This thing is UNBELIEVABLE.

Beth sure did love twisting Melina around like she was Play-Doh though. It reached a level at their rematch at Royal Rumble 2009 when Beth picked up Melina’s foot and beat her in the back of her own head with it, which I’m pretty sure broke all of the known laws of physics. Beth also specialized in pulling off other wacky ass feats of strength, like picking two people up at once into a DOUBLE BACKBREAKER.

Or like, you know, beating up men.

Like The Great Khali, whom she eliminated from the Royal Rumble. Or CM Punk, whom she lariated the shit out of during that match. Or Santino Marella. Be still my beating heart.

Beth deserves a shit ton of credit for the Glamarella angle. We love to heap praise on male wrestlers like Chris Jericho or Mick Foley for writing their own storylines. Well, Beth came up with Glamarella. I feel like she can dine out on that one for quite a while.

It was a perfect pairing. Santino was the goofiest wrestler in history. Beth was very dominant, and very serious, and when Santino made an open challenge to ANYONE, she took that seriously too. She beat Santino up and pinned him to win the match, then she flexed at him and he BUMPED ALL THE WAY TO THE FLOOR IN FEAR. My man. (If you watch this back, the people go apeshit when she wins and Beth is so overjoyed that they pulled it off just like she dreamed it that she can’t stop beaming. Bless.)

AND THE NEXT WEEK IT GOT A HUNDRED TIMES BETTER.

Beth came out again to continue the fight with Santino… or so she probably thought. They grabbed a waistlock, wrestled around for a minute, and then stopped. And stared. Santino grabbed her hair and waited, giving her every chance to fight him off. But Beth grabbed him back, and THEY KISSED for like 1.7 seconds before breaking apart, bewildered. Santino tried REALLY HARD not to look too pleased in case she beat the shit out of him again. And Beth looked like she had no earthly idea what had remotely possessed her to do that. And it was all so EXCELLENT.

As their relationship developed from there it was clear just how perfect a pairing it was. Santino Marella is the greatest comedian in the history of WWE, don’t @ me. Beth Phoenix might be the greatest straight man in company history as well. They were gold together. Santino just Santino’d all over the place with his hi-jinks, and Beth was there to roll her eyes and show that she did, somehow, like this guy, but she maybe wasn’t entirely sure… why. Beth was basically his heavy, saving him from trouble, carrying him on HER shoulders, and just generally being the dominant one. Very Chyna-esqe, but Beth was VASTLY better than Chyna in every single way, and frankly, Santino was way better than Triple H as well.

Anyway, at no time was this dynamic more apparent than during the mini feud they had with Batista.

BETH PHOENIX DREAM MATCH ALERT.

For a fun few weeks Santino kept mouthing off about Batista and landing himself in hot water, squealing and cowering whenever he came face to face with Big Dave. Beth, on the other hand, stepped up to him and slapped him in the face. When this happened I LOST ALLLLLL OF MY SHIT AND I IMMEDIATELY NEEDED ALL THE BETH VS. DAVE MATCHES. Sadly, that was one that never materialized.

There was one that did, however.

Soon after Gail Kim returned to WWE in 2009, her and Beth were in a random six-man and within half a second I did immediately need all of the Beth vs. Gail Kim matches. They brushed past one another a couple times – a tag match here, a battle royal there – and I was completely sold but they never had a singles match, and I became obsessed with this white whale of a match I thought I’d never see. Every time it came up, that was my #1 dream match.

Finally a whole two years later, Superstars in 2011 proved it was the king of all the C Shows and randomly booked my dream match, just like that. I went embarrassingly ballistic. And after all that anticipation, Beth and Gail went out there and ran absolutely stark raving wild for a whole four minutes and made all my dreams come true. They even shook hands afterwards like they knew they’d just delivered a workrate dream match for the people. And they did. Nobody has ever been more excited about a four minute C Show match than I was watching Beth Phoenix vs. Gail Kim.

Again, this is the beauty of Beth, the idea of her facing really anyone at all is exciting. Having a tiny little thing like Kelly or Maria to beat up? Interesting! Having a worker like Mickie or Gail to run around with? Sounds good! She wants to step to some male wrestler? Sign me up! She wants to give Jack Swagger’s Soaring Eagle mascot a Glam Slam for no apparent reason? Go nuts Beth!

That really did happen, by the way. Beth was so keen to do comedy that sometimes I wonder if she was just a classic stooging heel trapped in Beth Phoenix’s body. But really I think it just shows her incredible versatility. Being a bigger, powerful woman in a sea of Divas, it would have been the easiest thing in the world for Beth Phoenix to just be the monster heel. And she was so fantastic at it. But she was capable of so much more, and always wanted to show it. She could switch from dominant heel to bumbling around and getting rolled up, and still turn around and dominate again without losing her credibility. She could talk and act and show vulnerability and cry when needed. She could do ALL of the comedy, and was the perfect straight woman. And she was a super fun dominant babyface, but could also sell and garner sympathy, even with smaller opponents.

She even ran as a tweener for a while, straddling the line. What most people don’t remember about the Piggie James angle is how involved Beth Phoenix was – as Laycool teased the shit out of Mickie, Beth was caught in the middle, deciding who she’d rather beat up. After a few months of crowds begging Beth to do the right thing, she gave in to temptation and became a good guy.

From the jump Beth knew what the people really wanted: moves that spin around and fiery babyface comebacks. Her first move as a face was to bust out an AIRPLANE SPIN, and I mean, you just can’t beat that. She also added the GIANT SWING, and just generally had a bunch of fun spinning people around in a circle and lariating their heads off.

Plus, look at that sweet face. Who wants to boo this woman anyway?

Beth was a lot of fun as a babyface. My favorite part was how she became like a big sister to the other faces on Smackdown – Kelly Kelly and Tiffany. She’d team up with them and save them from beatdowns and ruffle their hair affectionately. One time during a tag team match, she did all the damage and then gestured to Kelly to say, “here, you can have this one”, and let her tag in and take the pin, like a present. ADORABLE.

*heart eyes emoji*

The only thing about this little ray of sunshine run is that it ended so soon and so tragically. Beth won the Women’s Title off Michelle McCool at Extreme Rules 2010 in a fun plunder match, but a couple weeks later she did her ACL and had to have surgery. Of course, fate would have it that the next week SmackDown was IN BUFFALO where she entered as the newly-crowned champion hometown hero, only to lose the title and be left laying on one leg crying miserable tears. I can’t even.

By the damn way, can we just stop to appreciate that Beth Phoenix was working on a busted ACL and SHE STILL PICKED UP TWO WOMEN ON HER SHOULDERS IN A DOUBLE BACKBREAKER ON ONE LEG.

Speaking of can we just, she had barely been back from this injury a month before DYING FOR OUR SINS at TLC in the first ever women’s Tables match vs. Laycool. A lot happens in this match but the main thing was Beth Phoenix bumping on her head to her absolute death over and over. She went full Trish here. In fact, when called upon Beth always did lean in and take some terrific shots; there’s a moment at Extreme Rules vs. Michelle where she eats shit on a pile of ironing boards (don’t ask). Beth could take some big bumps yo.

Now of course, that Tables Match involved Natalya too, and we gotta talk about Beth and Nattie. They were fun as a babyface powerhouse team in late 2010. They were AWESOME once they turned heel in the summer of 2011, became the Divas of Doom and went after Kelly Kelly. They were the perfect foils for Kelly as they railed against “Barbie dolls” in the division, and my God, those Beth vs. Kelly matches were just… *kisses fingers*

Beth and Kelly had amazing chemistry. The 2011 series was outstanding, subsequent matches were really good too, and even early on when Kelly was much greener, they always had fun with Beth just beating on her. This is what I’m talking about with Beth – even if I’m not specifically shouting DREAM MATCH, she just matches up so well with so many people in really exciting ways.

Back to the Divas of Doom, man, they literally invented a submission move just so they could tie all the pretty girls in knots and shove a mic in their faces while they screamed and cried. Wild. On a related note, I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention that Beth and Nattie had also taken to wearing bomb ass dresses on telly every week, calling themselves Pinup Strong, and there’s a moment one day on Smackdown where Nattie is beating up Kelly on the floor and Beth is sitting on the stairs in a dress watching on looking incredible and I’m pretty sure this 20 seconds of TV added about five years to my lifespan.

Somehow Beth and Natalya existed on TV together for over four years without ever facing each other one on one. Oh yes, Beth Phoenix Dream Match Alert.

When Beth was heading out the door in 2012, serendipity lead to her having one last SmackDown TV taping in Buffalo, and it was there in her hometown that she and Nattie finally got to have a match. You can see just how over the moon they are, and as tradition held they went absolutely stark raving wild for four whole minutes, including the one and only time in her career that anyone kicked out of the Glam Slam. A parting gift from Beth Phoenix. She had a couple more matches after that, but having her moment with Nattie in the ring and crying it out with her afterwards was about as appropriate a sendoff as you could get. Like so many of these women, she went out on her shield, putting the work in.

Beth always put the work in, she was a trooper. She is also a total sweetheart and I’m so happy for the last couple of years where she’s got to go into the Hall of Fame (best speech ever, don’t @ me either), be in the first Women’s Royal Rumble and now get this commentary gig. She deserves it all.

So this week was in celebration of a great wrestler. Next week will be… not that. And guys, trust me, you ain’t ready.

Check it out: Candice Michelle vs. Beth Phoenix – Women’s Title (No Mercy 2007) Beth vs. Mickie vs. Melina – Women’s Title (Raw, December 31st 2007) Beth Phoenix vs. Mickie James – Women’s Title (Raw, April 14th 2008) Beth Phoenix vs. Melina – I Quit (One Night Stand 2008) Beth Phoenix vs. Melina – Women’s Title (Royal Rumble 2009) Michelle McCool vs. Beth Phoenix – Women’s Title Extreme Makeover Rules (Extreme Rules 2010) Beth & Kelly vs. Laycool (Smackdown, April 30th 2010) Beth & Natalya vs. Laycool – Tables Match (TLC 2010) Beth Phoenix vs. Gail Kim (Superstars, June 30th 2011) Beth Phoenix vs. Kelly Kelly – Divas Title (Night of Champions 2011) Beth Phoenix vs. Eve – Divas Title (Vengeance 2011) Beth Phoenix vs. Natalya (Smackdown, September 28th 2012)

[rawiswhore]

Various WWF Wrestlers x Fem Reader- “I Was Gettin’ Some Head”

I wonder what many WWF/E wrestlers, specifically the ones I type about, would think of these fanfics I type about them?

They'd probably be laughing their heads off or be absolutely shocked, some would think "typical"...

There's a LOT of slash fanfiction shipping Jeff and Matt Hardy together (there was also a lot of fanfics about that during the Attitude era) even though the Hardy Boyz are actual brothers, not to mention there's fanfics shipping wrestlers into homosexual relationships, so...

There's wrestlers that probably even did some of the stuff I type about!

Speaking of that, I'm probably the only person who writes fanfiction about Bart Gunn, a wrestler that was never really that popular and now works as an electrician.

________________________________________________________________

A few days before Shawn Michaels' birthday in 1998, you were standing in the locker room near your locker, whereas Triple H and some other wrestlers were standing quite a few inches behind you, standing next to one another.

Who were these other wrestlers? Triple H, Shawn Michaels, Billy Gunn, Val Venis and Bart Gunn.

Triple H was dressed in a tight black D Generation X t-shirt and jeans, looking like he does when he appears on "Monday Night Raw".

Shawn was dressed in a white short sleeved shirt and jeans, Billy and Bart were dressed in loose fitting T-shirts and basketball shorts, and Val had a towel wrapped around his genitals, looking like when he enters the ring on "Monday Night Raw".

Val's towel was tucked in to hold his towel from falling out.

You were unbeknownst to what was behind you.

"What does everybody want?" Triple H shouted.

What Triple H exclaimed made you turn your head and look at what's behind you, you can easily recognize Triple H's voice.

"HEAD!" the other wrestlers standing next to Triple H replied, shouting this out, sounding like the audience when Al Snow asks his iconic, signature catchphrase.

Triple H shouted "HEAD!" in unison along with these men.

Shawn, Billy, Triple H and Val motioned at their crotch a la D Generation X, doing DX's "crotch chop" by pointing at their cum gutters, their hands forming a "v" shape and thrusting their crotches forward.

They didn't point at each other's  crotch, like Shawn pointing at Val's crotch and what have you.

Some other wrestlers in the locker room who weren't standing next to Triple H and standing by their lockers even shouted "HEAD!" along with Shawn, Billy, Val and Bart.

By the time the 1990's and even the 20th Century were coming to a close, after playing such silly, corny gimmicks in the WWF that were massive failures, a wrestler was finally going over (as they say in wrestling lingo), being now known as Al Snow, playing a schizophrenic madman that carried a decapitated mannequin head.

And what was his trademark mannequin head's name?

Head.

Can I make it any more obvious?

One of the things Al will always be remembered for is his catchphrase, where he shouts "What does everybody want?" to which the audience shouted back with "HEAD!" as Al showed off his severed mannequin head to the crowd.

Some of the audience would even hold Styrofoam mannequin heads and make them headbang in the crowd.

His catchphrase is meant to be a sexual innuendo, typical Attitude era.

Hearing Al's signature catchphrase and chants gave Triple H an idea, and he wanted to share this idea with other people, wrestlers mainly, that he knew you had sex with.

Previously, you shared with Triple H and Shawn Michaels an idea you had with them, while you sucked their cocks, they shouted their "suck it!" catchphrase as well as did their iconic signature crotch chops that go along with that taunt.

2 of the wrestlers Triple H shared this idea with were Billy Gunn and Val Venis, and they were thinking the same thing after hearing Al Snow's catchphrase.

The other person he shared this idea with was Bart Gunn, a wrestler you were becoming even more enamored with this year considering his hair is growing longer.

Bart figured Triple H had this idea, he's even thinking you have this idea as well.

There's someone Triple H wants to share this idea with as well as invite him to this rendezvous, and that's his former friend Shawn Michaels.

Sadly, Shawn wasn't in the WWF during most of 1998 due to a back injury, however, he did return to the WWF near the end of the summer of that year, albeit by sitting at the commentary table.

When Triple H told Shawn this idea over the phone, Shawn loved this idea, and luckily, in July, Shawn returned to the WWF sitting at the commentary table, not being able to wrestle.

You smiled from ear to ear and laughed hearing these wrestlers shout Al Snow's iconic catchphrase and question, and these wrestlers behind you saw it.

"What does everybody need?!" Triple H exclaimed and shouted again.

"HEAD!" these wrestlers standing next to Trips replied with, shouting it.

You walked up to these wrestlers behind you.

"I figured you guys would shout something like that to me, even I got an idea similar to what you're doing before this" you stated as you walked up to them, raising your voice so they can hear you "Is this a booty call? Do you white boys know what that word even means?"

You pointed your index finger to these wrestlers standing behind you, waving your finger back and forth across to these wrestlers shouting Al Snow's catchphrase at you.

"Doesn't 'booty call' mean a sexual invitation?" Triple H asked.

"Oh, you didn't know?" you asked, trying to say that like the New Age Outlaw's iconic catchphrase.

"Yo' ass betta caaaaaaaaaall some-bod-aaaaaaaaaaaaaay!" Billy retorted.

This resulted in the wrestlers standing in front of you laughing and smiling from ear to ear, even you couldn't help but laugh and smile with them.

"But yes, 'booty call' means sexual invitation" you explained when they stopped laughing.

"Why d'ya think we're shouting this at you?" Triple H asked.

They could've shouted this at other WWF women in the company, but they'd be saying that's sexual harassment.

You're the slut of the WWF, you're even sluttier than Sunny.

Sunny has left the WWF in the summer of 1998 because she doesn't want to play second fiddle to you and Sable.

Speaking of Sable, she might be an attractive woman with huge breasts, but she's married and has a daughter, and next year, she left the WWF and even sued the company due to sexual harassment and being forced to dress provocatively.

Jacqueline has joined the WWF this year, and she too is a beautiful woman with huge tits, but she isn't really sexually promiscuous.

Not to mention, considering she's an African American woman and DX had recently cut a promo in blackface (if you knew history, you'd know why black face is considered terrible) as well as once spray painted racist cartoons and messages on an all black wrestling faction's locker room, she definitely wants nothing to do with Triple H, Shawn and Billy.

Debra and Terri Runnels are married, and Chyna gets so much insults for the fact that she's an overtly muscular and even manly looking woman.

Luna Vachon isn't exactly Trish Stratus in the looks department either.

Even though Sable is an occasionally attractive woman, she looked so much older than her age, and if that's not bad enough, she had a really nasty personality backstage, always bragging she was the sole reason the WWF was suddenly blowing up in popularity in the late 90's, never mind Stone Cold, the Rock, or others.

Debra and even Terri Runnels were that same way, not that they're women with egos the size of Russia, but they looked older than their ages.

Plus, women like Ivory, Miss Kitty/The Kat, Trish Stratus, Lita, Stacy Keibler and Torrie Wilson weren't even in the WWF in 1998.

You've had many orgies with WWF wrestlers, so of course they're going to shout Al Snow's signature catchphrase at you.

"I'm not offended by your shouts at me" you confessed when you stood right in front of these wrestlers shouting that obscene quote at you. "Even I thought of asking you guys to shout Al Snow's signature question while I suck your cocks before you guys shouted it at me"

"Why didn't you ever say it to us?" Shawn asked.

"Because 4 men isn't 'everybody'" you confessed.

There were many men you wanted to do this with, but they weren't in the WWF and over in other wrestling companies.

Plus, you want these wrestlers to look a certain way when you suck their cocks, you want them to look hot and sexy.

You then sunk down to the floor until you crouched down on your knees.

"Y'want me to take my clothes off?" you asked these men standing in front of you, looking up at them.

They'd love to see your tits and cum on your breasts, so...maybe.

They nodded their heads.

"We don't want that shirt you're wearing to get any stains on it" Shawn admitted "Ifyknowwhatimean"

These wrestlers standing with Shawn laughed and chuckled at that, even you couldn't help but chuckle at what Shawn said.

You grabbed your shirt you were wearing and lifted it off of your torso and over your head, placing your top next to you on the floor.

You wore no bra under your top, showing off your bare tits.

Their eyes were growing wild seeing your naked breasts, grinning naughtily at your tits.

They could nearly make some wolf whistles at you like those rednecks in the audience who leer at sexy women in the WWF like Sable, Sunny and you.

One of your hands moved to the front of Triple H's fly area of his jeans, where you pulled the zipper down of his jeans, one of his hands popping the button out of the hole of his jeans.

He pulled his jeans and his boxers underneath down until his genitals were exposed to you, his erection pointing in front of your face.

The other wrestlers standing next to Triple H were following suit, pulling the zippers of their jeans down and unbuttoning their jeans or pulling their basketball shorts down, pulling their bottoms down until their erections were sticking out at you.

Val pulled his towel off, only to show that he wasn't wearing anything under that towel.

You could see their cocks all in front of you, your eyes were growing wild seeing these erections pointing at you.

Al Snow's signature decapitated mannequin head he carries around also has the words "Help Me" scrawled on its forehead.

Wonder if they could write "Help Me" on your forehead in lipstick or eyeliner or even with a marker?

Should you suggest this?

Hmmmm...

"You've got such perfect cock sucking lips" Triple H purred, his thumb running across your lips. "Perfect to be wrapped around me and the boys' dicks"

The other men standing with Triple H agreed with him, nodding their heads and smiling.

"No wonder she's in DX!" Billy stated. "We say 'suck it' and she's got those cocksucking lips!"

Triple H and the other wrestlers laughed and chuckled at that.

Triple H could nearly shout "let's get ready to suck iiiiiit!" like how he shouts on "Monday Night Raw" with DX in the ring, so could Shawn Michaels, Billy Gunn and even Val Venis, but would that be too corny and silly, even unsexy?

Speaking of suck it, Triple H lifted his hands and made his hands form a "v" shaped chopping motion at his "cum gutters" as they're called.

"Now suck it!!!" Triple H exclaimed, his hands making a chopping motion at his cum gutters when he shouted "suck it!".

He didn't just crotch chop at you, but also pushed his crotch forwards towards your face.

Billy, Shawn and Val saw and heard what Triple H shouted, smiling and chuckling at him.

You leaned your face into Triple H's genitals, until his cock had entered your mouth, your lips wrapped around his shaft, and proceeded to start sucking his penis.

Your hands were trying not to touch the floor, because you might want to wrap your fingers around these men's cocks and if you touched the dirty floor, you'll get your dirty fingers on their cocks, you might even taste their dicks that have been touched by the dirty floor if you sucked their penises and that would taste nasty.

One of your fingers wrapped around Shawn's shaft, whereas the other fingers wrapped around the bottom of Triple H's cock.

You wish you could have a huge mouth so you could fit so many cocks inside your mouth at the same time.

"What does everybody want?!" Triple H shouted.

"HEAD!" these other wrestlers standing next to him answered.

"What does everybody need?!" Triple H shouted and asked.

"HEAD!" the wrestlers with him replied with again, shouting it.

"What does every love?!" Triple H shouted.

"HEAD!!" Shawn, Val, Billy and even Bart exclaimed.

Triple H even shouted "head" in unison with these other wrestlers.

Some wrestlers standing at their lockers far away not involved in this orgy even shouted out "HEAD!" along with these wrestlers.

Speaking of that, some other wrestlers who won't be getting a blowjob this afternoon saw you squatting on the floor while these wrestlers you thought were sexy were circled around you, their cocks pointing at you while you sucked Triple H's cock.

Some of them were shouting and roaring out "yyyyyyyyeaaaaaaaaaaaahhh!!", others just kept calm and carried on, rolling their eyes and walking away.

One wrestler shouted "Get a room!".

Isn't the locker room still a room nonetheless?

Another wrestler not swarming around you shouted "suck it!" while pointing to his crotch a la D Generation X, but you didn't bother to look at him.

Wonder if Al Snow is gonna see this?

Since Triple H is shouting "what does everybody want?", to which these men retort "HEAD!", an oral sex reference, and the keyword is "everybody", you tried to widen your mouth by letting the side of your mouth spread wider, enough for someone else's cock to enter.

That someone else's cock was none other than Shawn Michaels.

You tried to pull Shawn's cock into your mouth, even if you already had a dick inside your mouth, where his cock managed to squeeze into your mouth despite there already being a penis inside your mouth.

Shawn was absolutely surprised, his eyes growing wide, and even the men standing with Shawn were surprised at you trying to put his cock in your mouth.

Well, Triple H did ask "what does everybody want?", only for the men standing with him to respond with "HEAD!", which is an oral sex slang term and double entendre if you're Al Snow.

Keyword: "everybody".

The sides of your mouth were hurting by having two cocks inside your mouth, but wonder if you could handle it?

You also wonder if you could try to fit Billy Gunn's cock in your mouth...

You managed to try to suck on 2 cocks inside your mouth, even if it was difficult and your mouth was hurting.

One side of your mouth stretched out to make room for another cock.

Your fingers unraveled off of Triple H's shaft and wrapped around the bottom of Billy's shaft, where you pulled his dick to your mouth and tried to fill the empty space inside your mouth with his cock.

Billy's eyes grew wild when he saw you try to fit his own penis inside your mouth, he nearly could jump backwards at you trying to put his cock in your mouth.

Even the other men standing next to Billy could jump back over you trying to put another penis in your mouth despite you having 2 cocks in your mouth.

Their eyes were getting bigger at you trying to put another cock in your mouth, taken by surprise.

Though, they shouldn't be surprised at you trying to put more than 2 dicks in your mouth.

It was a tight fit, your mouth could barely fit 3 penises in your mouth, let alone suck on them.

These sexy male wrestlers standing in front of you grinned at you, their mouths spreading these shiteating, ear-to-ear smiles at you.

Despite being shocked at trying to put 3 cocks inside your mouth, Triple H doesn't mind this.

Remember, he said "There's a lot of bi things I am, but lingual is not one of them!".

It was a little difficult trying to suck on 3 cocks in your mouth, trying to make your mouth go up and down their shafts in an attempt to suck their dicks, but you have a reason why you're doing it.

Meanwhile, some wrestlers in the locker room saw you trying to suck on 3 dicks inside your mouth, their eyes were growing wide in shock and their jaws dropping, their hands covering their mouths.

They even were getting other wrestlers in the locker room to take a look at this, they were completely shocked as well.

Some wrestlers were roaring in delight, shouting "yyyyyyeaaaaaaaaaaah!!!" like trashy rednecks, others didn't bother to look at this.

And, to top it all off, you had 3 members of D Generation X (or, at least one former member of DX)'s cocks inside your mouth.

Heh, gives new meaning to "suck it".

Some people in the locker room even were shouting "suck it!" and chopping at their crotches a la D Generation X.

Since Val Venis is known for playing a porn star in the WWF, he wrapped his fingers around his shaft and tried putting his cock into your mouth, the tip of his penis poking to your mouth, trying to slide it in between 2 other cocks.

Some of the other wrestlers saw Val trying to put his dick in your mouth, admiring his chutzpah and understanding precisely why you're doing this.

They smiled from ear to ear and chuckled at him.

"Why are you trying to put 3 cocks in your mouth?" Bart Gunn asked you, tapping at your shoulder so you can hear him. "Or even...4?"

Your eyes looked up at him and your mouth pulled up to the top of Triple H, Shawn and Billy's cocks until all 3 of their dicks escaped your mouth, their dicks now smothered in precum and your saliva.

"Well, he asked 'what does everybody want?'" you confessed, pointing at Triple H "to which they all replied with 'head' shouts"

"I didn't exactly mean it that way!" Triple H admitted, smiling and laughing.

"Would you be annoyed if I sucked on your cock for a while, only to suck on his immediately after?" you asked Triple H, pointing to Shawn when referring to "his". "Since you'd be so enjoying me sucking your dick only to be interrupted. You said that everybody wants head!"

Keyword: "everybody".

"Actually, yeah, I would be annoyed" Triple H admitted. "But that's why I'm telling you to 'suck it'!"

He lifted his hands and made them form a chopping motion at his cum gutters, doing DX's iconic "crotch chop", this crotch chop was forming a "v" shape at his cum gutters as they're called.

Shawn and Billy smiled and cackled from ear to ear hearing that, so did Val Venis for that matter.

"Now suck it again!" Triple H ordered, his hand making a chopping motion at one of his cum gutters.

You leaned your face into his genitals until his cock had entered your mouth, where you proceeded to suck his dick, your lips wrapped around his shaft.

Even though Triple H in July of 1998 is pretty hot, the hottest he's looked by far was at the beginning of 1998, like in January that year, or in March that year.

While this Triple H you don't have to imagine you're sucking his cock since you are currently sucking his dick, you're imagining you're giving Triple H at the beginning of 1998 a blowjob, that's the hottest he's ever looked.

As you sucked on Triple H's dick, these wrestlers swarming you with their penises pointing at your face stared down at you, Triple H included, smiling and grinning at you.

When you sucked on Triple H's cock, some precum was spilling out of the slit of his penis head, landing on your tongue, only for you to swallow that cum down.

One of the things you're contemplating of doing as you suck off Triple H is crank Shawn and Billy's (as well as Val and Bart's) shafts, masturbating them.

Triple H put his hands on top of your head, where his fingers sunk through your hair, and he pulled you into his genitals.

"Just take my big, juicy cock" Triple H purred, his voice low and husky "My filthy dirty cumslut"

Triple H dressed in his usual DX gear was playing his character he plays on "Monday Night Raw" even in the locker room when the cameras weren't filming him.

Though, Shawn Michaels, Billy Gunn and Val Venis were playing their characters on "Monday Night Raw" as well during this orgy.

Triple H could nearly say his classic, iconic sexual innuendo he says on "Monday Night Raw", even before you started giving him oral sex, but most of his sexual innuendo is related to putting his dick in your twat.

Plus, he almost could say "I don't think you could handle this huge cock", but you've sucked his cock before as well as these other men standing next to his dick.

Triple H eventually slid his fingers from out of your hair, where he made his hands form an "x" shape by crossing them at the wrists above his genitals, only to raise those hands up, still in an "x" shape and quickly drop them down.

"Suck it!!" he shouted, thrusting his crotch into your face.

Shawn chuckled a la Ted DeBiase Sr. and smiled from ear to ear, so did Val Venis and Billy Gunn.

What your eyes could see above your face was Triple H's hands forming an "x" shape while he did DX's iconic signature gesture.

He then separated his hands and motioned his hands to chop at his cum gutters, this time in a "v" shape.

"Suck it!!" he exclaimed again, pushing his crotch to your face again, but not enough to bump you down.

"Suck it!!" Shawn exclaimed, his hands chopping at his cum gutters in a "v" shape, like this:

 Your eyes darted to Shawn, you could easily recognize his voice and even tell it was Shawn who shouted that, only to find him crotch chopping like a muddafucka.

Your mouth slid up Triple H's shaft, only for your lips to shift and slide over to Shawn's cock, shifting and sliding to his penishead.

Before you could do this, you have to ask them something...

"Hey guys!" you shouted, pointing your index finger at these wrestlers about to get blowjobs, killing the mood and sounding serious. "Should I jerk your cocks off? Masturbate you guys while I'm giving head?"

They were thinking the same thing.

Why were you holding Shawn's dick but not jacking him off.

They all want to cum in your mouth, be it precum or official cum, but they want to jizz on your face and your tits.

"Though, I thought I was here to suck cock" you stated "Not just jerk you guys off!"

They laughed hearing that.

Besides, you might get cum in your eyes, and that hurts.

They shrugged their shoulders, suggesting doing whatever you want, though, they'd love to see your face and tits drenched in cum.

Maybe next time you could do that, though maybe when they officially cum, you could clean their cocks off with your mouth and tongue (that rhymed) while they shout Al Snow as well as DX's signature catchphrase and do DX's signature, iconic gesture.

Decisions, decisions...

You decided not to do it, considering they're here to get blowjobs, not handjobs, much to the dismay of these wrestlers standing in front of you.

Shawn was shouting "suck it!" over and over again like an overexcited child, his hands chopping away at his cum gutters (I feel so embarrassed typing "cum gutters", but what else am I supposed to call them?), forming a "v" shape with them.

Triple H was chuckling and smiling hearing Shawn exclaim that, Billy and Val were smiling and laughing at this too.

Bart, meanwhile, was keeping his usual straight face, not seeming all that enthusiastic.  

"What does everybody want?!" Shawn roared, a wide, ear-to-ear smile plastered across his face.

"HEAD!" the wrestlers swarming with their dicks at you retorted, having the same ear-to-ear grins on your face as Shawn.

Even some wrestlers in the locker room who weren't circling you and were busy taking a shower or whatever shouted "HEAD!".

Shawn was trying not to cackle and laugh.

"What does everybody need?!" Shawn quoted, saying it the way Al Snow says it (though all of these men are saying it like how Al shouts it.

"HEAD!" Triple H, Billy, Val and even Bart shouted, some of these men, in particular Val and Triple H, making their hands form "crotch chopping" motions at their cum gutters.

"And what does everybody love?" Shawn asked, saying it loudly.

"HEAD!" the wrestlers, both with their cocks out and others who aren't bothered to join this orgy, replied.

Because of Shawn and the rest of the crew being loud, obnoxious dipshits, some people are standing by and watching what's going on.

Others are entering the locker room over the commotion, they can hear all the shouting and roaring from another room, only to find you giving head to who you think are the sexiest men in the WWF, for now, anyway.

Some are rolling their eyes and not bothering with this, some are hitting their heads with the palms of their hands, doing the iconic "face palm", others are watching this, enjoying this and even masturbating to it.

Are you and these wrestlers going to be arrested for being way too loud as well as indecent exposure?

Shawn's hands joined each other, crossing each other at the wrists, making an "x" shape.

His hands were above his genitals and raised those hands up, the hands still in an "x" shape when he raised them, only to quickly drop those hands down, still in an "x" shape.

"Suck it!!" he proclaimed, thrusting his crotch into your face.

He cackled like Ted DeBiase Sr. or after he shouted "I was up...all...night!" while he crotch chopped behind a podium, during that notorious moment where D Generation X had a presidential-like announcement and they promised not to use R-rated curse words.

His laughter was contagious, Billy, Triple H and Val laughing as well, having wide ear-to-ear smiles spread across their faces.

Shawn's hands separated, only now for his hands to do the "V" shaped crotch chop and for his hands to point at his cum gutters.

"Suck it!!!" he shouted again as he did that gesture, and you sucked it.

"Suck it!!!" Billy interrupted, his hands pointing to his crotch by making his hands form a "v" shaped crotch chop, pushing his crotch forward when he shouted that phrase.

When you've sucked his cock and swallowed his precum, as well as heard him shout Al Snow's catchphrase, it's time to move to the next man to get a blowjob, that next man is Billy Gunn.

Your head rose up from Shawn's cock and shifted over to Billy's dick sliding your lips across from the tip of Shawn's penis to Billy's penis head, only for your mouth to engulf Billy's penis head as well as the rest of his shaft.

You proceeded to start to suck Billy's cock, and while you gave him head, you imagined you were sucking Billy at the end of 1997, when he had those bows tied in his hair, and even sometimes imagined you were sucking him during his RockaBilly days in April of '97.

His hair is growing a little bit longer as 1998 progresses on, but the hottest Billy has ever looked by far was at the end of 1997.

Billy was smiling from ear to ear at you sucking his cock, his head and eyes looking down at you sucking him off.

"What does everybody want?!" Billy asked loudly.

The other wrestlers as well as some of the other locker room responded back by shouting "HEAD!".

He was asking what Al Snow asks in his entrance theme, only for the same response, that response being "HEAD!".

Speaking of Al Snow, when you were giving oral sex to Billy, some wrestler walked up to you and brought Al Snow along with him.

Thank goodness you're looking at these men swarming around you, otherwise a wrestler you're not attracted might approach you and want to suck his cock, you don' t want that.

"Heard the boys shouting Al Snow's catchphrase" this wrestler said "I'm surprised you're not giving him head!"

He pointed to Al Snow with his index finger.

Indeed, he's right about you're giving blowjobs while quoting his iconic signature catchphrase, but not involving the man who shouted that catchphrase?

Al used to be cute back in 1996 when he played that corny Leif Cassidy gimmick (even though his hair looked pretty awful), he was even kinda cute when he played a ninja named Avatar.

He now has dirty blond hair with dark roots exposed at the top of his head and a sleazy handlebar moustache.

You're really not sure what to think of Al with the way he looks like now.

He isn't Paul Bearer levels of ugly, but he isn't as sexy as Shawn Michaels either.

You also don't really wanna hurt Al's feelings, but you're unsure whether or not to give him, well, head.

Maybe you can imagine you're sucking him off when he's Leif Cassidy or even played that ninja character.

He's kind of hot with this dirty long blond hair and even that handlebar moustache.

"Y'want to suck him off?" this wrestler asked, still pointing his index finger to Al.

You shrugged your shoulders, unsure if you want to give him head or not.

"You don't know?" this wrestler asked.

You nodded your head, still having a cock in your mouth.

"I'm honestly not all that sexy" Al Snow confessed "Most people wouldn't find me all that hot, that includes her"

Al pointed to you with his index finger, though you and Al used to fuck a few times, but that was when he was Leif Cassidy (before he grew facial hair).

"I used to fuck her before I grew facial hair" Al admitted to this wrestler, still pointing at you "That was 2 years ago"

Hmmm, maybe Al could shout his catchphrase while these wrestlers swarming you could answer Al's iconic, signature question.

Billy, meanwhile, was smiling from ear to ear (and he has a beautiful smile), and of course he had to do DX's iconic crotch chop, both variations of it by making his hands form an "x" shape and a "v" shape over his crotch as well as shout the iconic, obscene catchphrase that goes with that gesture.

As you sucked on his cock, precum was leaking from the slit of his penishead and onto your tongue, only for you to gulp and swallow it down.

When you were busy giving Billy Gunn head, Shawn, however, leaned his head close to Triple H's ear, where he confessed that he thought of writing "Help Me" on your forehead in lipstick or eyeliner or even a marker, much like that iconic mannequin head that Al Snow carries into the ring with him.

Triple H liked this idea, though, would you like it?

Triple H turned his head towards you and tapped you on your shoulder, which made you look up at him.

You pulled your face away from Billy's cock until his dick left your mouth.

"Would you like it if we wrote 'help me' on your forehead with lipstick or a marker or something?" he asked. "Like that mannequin head Al Snow carries to the ring"

"I was thinking of doing that as well" you confessed "Though, it seems  a little tacky, plus, the words 'help me' scrawled across my forehead would make it seem like I'm getting raped, and I'm not"

"Touché" Triple H replied, nodding his head.

"I'm not roleplaying a rape victim or a sex slave" you confessed "Maybe next time we could do this"

After you had sucked on Billy's cock until some precum leaked out of his dick and you felt like you swallowed enough of it, Val Venis shouted "suck it!" at you while his hands motioned at his crotch, his hands making chopping motions.

You shifted your head towards Val's genitals, where you obeyed his order, leaning your face into his crotch until his dick was in your mouth.

You're surprised Val Venis has never crotch chopped and shouted "suck it" on "Monday Night Raw", considering he plays a PORN STAR and he'd be taunting oral sex while pointing at his genitals.

Fun fact: apparently Val almost was a member of D Generation X.

Val was grinning at you when you shifted your face from Billy's genitals to his, though you would honestly rather not look at him.

While he isn't as hideous as most of the men over in ECW, he isn't that hot or sexy despite being a popular sex symbol in the WWF (with emphasis on "sex"), though Val is pretty hot.

He's probably the male sex symbol during the WWF's Attitude era, much like the Ravishing Rick Rude (who he ALWAYS gets comparisons to) during the 80's Golden era and Shawn Michaels during the New Generation era.

Of course, Val had to ask this simple question...

"What does everybody want?"

He didn't shout it, he said it smoothly like how he says it in the WWF with his rough, rugged, gravelly, raspy voice.

"HEAD!" the wrestlers standing next to him retorted, even some other people in the locker room shouted "head" along with them.

"What does everybody need?" he asked again.

"HEAD!" most of the locker room answered.

"And what does everybody love?" Val asked.

"Head!" the locker room shouted.

Some said "head" in a deadpan voice while rolling their eyes.

Val laughed a bit in his throaty, raspy voice after hearing that.

He was staring down at you while you sucked him off, and of course, he couldn't help but do DX's crotch chop twice while you fellated him, both variations of the crotch chop as well as shout "suck it" while he thrusted his crotch to your face.

Sometimes, he even quoted some of his signature sexual innuendo he says on "Monday Night Raw", which would lead to some of the men standing next to him laughing, even you giggled a bit while you sucked him off.

One wrestler who you have had sex with a few times as well as thought of doing it with occassionally is Bob Holly.

The same Bob Holly who played Spark E. Plugg, a wrestler whose gimmick is a racecar driver, who would be in the New Midnight Express with Bart Gunn and eventually cut his hair and bleach it blond.

Bob is kind of handsome, even when he died his hair blond when he was in the Midnight Express, and since you have banged him a few times, Bob walked up to these wrestlers circled around you getting oral sex, only for your eyes to see him.

He probably wants some head too.

While he is a little bit attractive, he's not that hot, he has one huge overbite.

Though, you could imagine you're sucking on someone more attractive than him while you're giving him head...

Speaking of that, even though Val is pretty hot, a few times as you've given him oral sex, you're imagining sucking off someone hotter than him, like Rob Van Dam, Jeff Hardy, or even a sexy movie star or rock star.

Since Bart is probably the last one and you've sucked some precum out of Val, you shifted your head over from Val's penis to Bart's, but before you could give some oral sex...

"So Bob" you said to him, pointing at Bob Holly. "You want some head too?"

"I've thought of it" he confessed "We've fucked a few times"

"I know" you admitted "But...I'm not as crazy for you like I am with Triple H and Shawn"

At least you're being honest.

He knows.

You've fucked Shawn and Triple H numerous times as well as the likes of Jeff Hardy and even Billy Gunn.

He barely got any sex from you.

"Maybe I could give you some head" you suggested, shrugging your shoulders. "Though, you could have a ringrat go and give you head"

You should've said that to Al Snow.

Bob knows you aren't that attracted to him, plus, he's nowhere near as lusted over as Shawn Michaels or even Val Venis are.

Bob walked away, but he does know what a massive whore you are.

His tagteam partner Bart, meanwhile, motioned a crotch chop at his crotch and shouted "suck it!" at you, sounding and looking enthusiastic.

You proceeded to start sucking on his dick while he stared at you.

Even though Bart always keeps a straight face on "Monday Night Raw", he used to smile and act like he as having a good time when he was in the Smoking Gunns tagteam with Billy Gunn.

While you sucked him off, of course he had to crotch chop at you twice while shouting "suck it" like the other men did.

Pretty soon, you took turns sucking on these wrestler's cocks while they stood in front of you and circled around you.

When you gave fellatio to them, sometimes your tongue licked up as well as around their shafts, licking up the precum that trickled down their erections.

Though, you're supposed to be sucking it, not licking it, though you're still giving head either way.

When you were busy sucking off these other wrestlers, Triple H exclaimed "My bazooka is locked, cocked and ready to unload!", complete with one of his hands making a chopping motion at his cum gutters, to which you would eventually suck on his cock, as well as sometimes quoted some of the sexual innuendo he used to say at the female audience on “Monday Night Raw” during his early DX days.

You also sometimes used the tip of their penises like a lipstick, rubbing their penisheads across your lips.

Strange, but oddly sexy.

You basically sucked their cocks until they officially came, not just having precum enter your mouth.

Wonder if Triple H and most of the WWF roster watched ECW in 1997 and 1998?

I know some WWF wrestlers got their starts in ECW; Mick Foley, the Dudley Boyz and Stone Cold are examples, and ECW crossed over in the WWF in 1997, but I wonder if Triple H and some of the WWF roster watched ECW in 1997 and 1998?

Why?

Because Al Snow debuted the character he'll always be remembered for, a schizophrenic who carried a severed mannequin head, in ECW during those years, and he was a massive favorite in that company, people in the audience holding mannequin heads.

Maybe you could've given oral sex to Triple H, Shawn Michaels, Billy Gunn, Jeff Hardy and maybe a few others in late 1997/early 1998 while they shout Al's iconic, signature catchphrase, before Al joined the WWF with the gimmick he'll always be remembered for.

Epilogue: a few months later as well as into the next year, you actually had a few orgies with Triple H, Shawn, Billy, Val, Bart and some hot wrestlers who joined the WWF like Jeff Hardy, Christian and Test, where they shouted Al Snow's catchphrase while you sucked their cocks.

When Al Snow and his mannequin head's popularity were increasing, you would walk to the ring in the WWF, some men in the audience would hold signs that said things like "I want head from y/n!" and "Everybody needs head from y/n!", as well as chant "We want head!" at you.

They also held signs like "Y/n, I'll let you SUCK IT!" and they'd crotch chop at you, shouting at you to "suck it", though men in the WWF were carrying and signs like that and shouting DX's catchphrase while doing their signature gesture at you even before Al Snow was in the WWF.

Just imagine if these horny men and teenage boys who write those kinds of signs saw what you did backstage with these wrestlers, they'd be in lust.

So much lust, they'd want you to suck their cocks while they shouted Al Snow and DX's catchphrase and did DX's iconic body language.

They probably do have sexual fantasies of that, as well as sexual fantasies of Sable, Debra, Terri Runnels, Sunny, Miss Kitty/Stacy Carter, Trish Stratus, and other wrestling women and maybe even a few non-wrestling female celebrities give them blowjobs while these hornballs shout Al Snow and DX's signature catchphrases and do DX's signature gesture.

During Thanksgiving at the end of the year 2000, you actually gave a blowjob to Al Snow while he shouted his iconic catchphrase, and Jeff Hardy, Christian and Test were there too, you gave them blowjobs as well.

Al had shaved his facial hair by then and looked so much cuter and hotter.

Triple H had grown some facial hair and was with Stephanie McMahon, although at least Trips didn't look as bad as he did in 2005/2006 when he had that handlebar moustache.

Shawn was barely in the WWF in the year 2000, Billy Gunn cut his hair at the end of the year, so did Val Venis.

Plus, since it was at Thanksgiving time, and Debra asked on a Thanksgiving themed "Monday Night Raw" if anyone would like some of her pie while she held up a pumpkin pie, of course you let Al, Test, Jeff and Christian have a taste of your pie and your legs, thighs and breasts.

You're not talking about pumpkin pie or legs, thighs and breasts from a turkey.

________________________________________________________________

I actually had wanted to post this fanfic on Christian's birthday (yes, the Jay Beso Christian), though I changed my mind when I saw a clip of Val Venis getting "bloodbathed" by the Brood, which gave me an idea to type the fanfic I posted on Christian's birthday.

Plus, the fanfic I posted on Christian's birthday starred him, whereas the fanfic I originally wanted to post on his birthday would mention him just a few times.

I originally wanted to set this fanfic when Al Snow was so over, there were several people in the audience holding up mannequin heads, but I set this fanfic when Al Snow was an up-and-coming wrestler.

[latestnews2018-blog]

Jazz On Former WWE Diva Refusing To Shake Her Hand, Vince McMahon&#039;s Reaction To Her First PPV Match

New Post has been published on https://latestnews2018.com/jazz-on-former-wwe-diva-refusing-to-shake-her-hand-vince-mcmahons-reaction-to-her-first-ppv-match/

Jazz On Former WWE Diva Refusing To Shake Her Hand, Vince McMahon's Reaction To Her First PPV Match

As previously noted, former WWE Women’s Champion Jazz was a guest on episode seven of Noonan Speaks. During the podcast, Jazz talked about her first impression of Chyna, working with WWE Hall Of Famer Trish Stratus, and her relationships with Vince and Stephanie McMahon.

According to Jazz, when she was getting her start in WWE, Chyna was on her way out. Apparently, ‘The Female Fighting Phenom’ introduced herself to Chyna and ‘The Ninth Wonder Of The World’ would not even shake her hand. Jazz went on to say that this type of conduct was a stark departure from how things were at ECW.  

“I saw Chyna there one Monday and I never saw her there again. It was really weird because she was in a corner by herself. I had heard stories. Yeah, yeah, yeah… I didn’t really know, but out of respect to Chyna, I went and introduced myself and she didn’t even reach her hand out, extend her hand out whatsoever to try to shake my hand to say ‘hello’ or anything. And I was like, ‘whoa, okay…'” Jazz added, “that was something new because in ECW, we were a family. Friday, Saturday, Sunday, we get to the building, we shake hands, we hug, we go, ‘hey, hey, hey’ every weekend. Friday, Saturday, Sunday, the first thing we do is shake hands and hug. That’s how we greet each other in ECW. And then, you get to WWE, you don’t know if you should speak. It’s a whole different world over there.”

Also during the podcast, Jazz shared that Trish Stratus loved working her because of how good she made Trish’s finish look.

“I mean, Trish loved for me to take her finisher.” Jazz recalled, “she was like, ‘oh my God, I love the way you take my finisher!’ Like, I might have took Trish Stratusphere, Trish this and whatever. She had the Stratus-every-damn-thing and I took them! The Stratusfaction, The Stratusphere, The Stratus-this, The Stratus-that!”

Jazz mentioned that Trish has said that their feud is what also elevated ‘Canada’s Greatest Export’ to a new stratosphere, pun intended.

“My job was to freaking go out there and make them look good. I’ve heard stories that Trish put me over about who actually gave her the credibility of being a legit f–king wrestler.” Jazz continued, “before I got there, she had some matches, but when I came, it totally went into a whole different gear. Like we turned it up like five notches.”

Moreover, Jazz recalled Vince McMahon telling her she did a great job in her first pay-per-view match versus Trish.

“I remember my first pay-per-view match with Trish, and, at the time, they were still putting me up in the office hotel, as we’d call it.” Jazz explained, “the office would stay at a hotel and the talent would get their own rooms elsewhere. You don’t want to be at the same hotel as the office. So anyways, I’m staying at the hotel where Vince and everyone is staying. And I’m standing there waiting in line to get to the counter to get my room and Vince and Linda walked in. And Vince shakes my hand. He’s like, ‘kid, great freaking job. That was awesome match tonight.’ And I was like, ‘holy moly! Vince McMahon just shook my hand and gave me a compliment!’ So that alone right there, that’s a standout moment alone right there as far as WWE goes.”

On Jazz’s relationship with Stephanie McMahon, ‘The Baddest b—h’ said she always looked to Stephanie as someone to talk to, being another woman in the male dominate business of pro wrestling.

“Stephanie was someone I looked to as… she was a woman.” Jazz elaborated, “I looked to her as someone I could go to, to talk to, where maybe she could understand me as far as being a woman in a male dominant business. So I don’t know. I’m the type of person, I just feel like I can talk to anybody. Like, everybody puts their pants on the same way I put mine on, one leg at a time. So I never looked at them like God, Jesus, or that, but I respected them because they were the bosses. But I would go up to Stephanie and say, ‘hey, what’s up, Steph? Yada, yada, yada. Whatever.'”

Jazz professed that was never intimidated to talk to people with ample money, power, and respect.

“That’s just the type of person I am.” Jazz shared, “I just feel like no one is perfect or beyond God or someone that’s unapproachable to where you can’t go and talk to them. So maybe I was wrong on doing those things, but, hey, I’ll go up to Vince and say, ‘hey, what’s going on? How’s it going?’ at any given moment.”

Check out the interview here. If you use any of the quotes from this article, please credit Noonan Speaks with an H/T to Wrestling Inc. for the transcription.

Source: Noonan Speaks

(function(d, s, id) var js, fjs = d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0]; if (d.getElementById(id)) return; js = d.createElement(s); js.id = id; js.src = “http://connect.facebook.net/en_US/sdk.js#xfbml=1&version=v2.10&appId=123325808288224”; fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js, fjs); (document, ‘script’, ‘facebook-jssdk’));

[rawiswhore]

Shawn Michaels x Fem Reader- “Me So Horny” Part 1

After the WWF show of the night in October of 1997, Shawn Michaels and a few other wrestlers, specifically ones he was friends with like Triple H and Billy Gunn, were walking down a hallway to the locker room, laughing and chatting away.

The WWF is a testosterone fest, how could it not be considering it has so many overtly muscular pro wrestlers?

Testosterone isn't just a steroid injected into someone, but also a hormone that helps men's sexual characteristics, including building muscle and growing body hair.

Keyword: sexual.

And being in a company notorious for having testosterone pumped men and even having beautiful, sexy, sexualized petite women was sure to raise these men's testosterone levels.

However, a lot of pro wrestlers on steroids, especially the super muscular ones that do look like they're on steroids like Hulk Hogan and the Ultimate Warrior, aren't that good looking and sexy to you.

Shawn, Billy and Triple H weren't much different backstage as they are in their newest WWF characters, Shawn and Triple H's newest characters being D Generation X and Billy being a member of the New Age Outlaws, who eventually would join D Generation X.

And tonight, they're acting much like the characters they're currently playing, but with the cameras not rolling (and without being rude and disrespectful to others).

Shawn was feeling super horny, so was Triple H and even Billy Gunn.

"We are some HORNY motherfuckers!" Shawn exclaimed, putting emphasis on the word "horny". "And we need a dirty, horny, naughty slut to fuck!"

Most of the other wrestlers probably don't wanna hear what Shawn said, considering they hate Shawn and what a disrespectful jerk he's been during his 90's heyday.

The ones Shawn was friends with, like Billy Gunn and Triple H, were shouting "yyeaaaaahhh!!!", having huge ear to ear smiles on their faces and high fiving Shawn.

Shawn and a few other wrestlers weren't just walking back to the locker room, you were too.

And they weren't the only ones who were horny, you were horny too.

How can you not feel horny?

Not only did you have a LOT of sex in 1997, sometimes with multiple people at the same time, but you're surrounded by so many hot, sexy men.

Seeing so many hot, sexy men in the WWF and sharing a locker room with them was making you horny.

The media doesn't turn you into a slut, hot, sexy men do!

Shawn was beautiful all year round, the sexiest he's ever been so far, Billy Gunn now has his long platinum blond hair back, and Triple H has his hair hanging down completely.

And those weren't the only hot men in the WWF right now.

As you and these other wrestlers had entered the locker room, you weren't the only slut in the WWF at the moment.

Sunny was perhaps the most popular woman in the WWF at that time, she basically started the WWF Diva/sexualized woman more about her beauty and sluttiness than her wrestling talent craze.

And she's notorious for being a slut and for fucking around with so many wrestlers.

And while she might be a beautiful woman, yes, and she's slutty, and I'm sure many of the other horny wrestlers in the locker room want a piece of her (and probably already have!), you don't want the wrestlers you want to bang tonight to do her tonight, at least first bang her.

Even though you do kind of like Sunny because she's beautiful, charismatic, stylish and slutty, you hate that she has to be the biggest slut in the WWF, because there should really only be one slut in the WWF, and that's you!

Then again, Sunny will sleep with anybody, and you have standards.

There are some wrestlers you won't have sex with.

Terri Runnels, who then was known as Marlena, was also in the WWF, but she's hooked up with Golddust and she isn't sexually promiscuous.

Sable is already married to Johnny Mero and she can keep him.

Chyna isn't quite Sunny, Trish Stratus, and Stacy Keibler in the beauty department either, especially considering so many men used to trash Chyna for looking like a man.

They could bang a ringrat or two, or even more, but some of these ringrats are just nasty and not all that pretty.

So I guess it's just you, and you want it to be you.

"We know who that slut is not named Sunny!" Shawn added and shouted, pulling you closer to his side while wrapping one arm behind the small of your back. "And that's y/n!"

The other wrestlers clapped back at him, shouting "yyyeaaaaaahhh!!!" while having ear to ear smiles.

You didn't mind being called a "slut", you even have a fetish for it.

You, too, had an ear to ear smile and you didn't mind being fucked by Shawn and other hot wrestlers that night.

"You in the mood to be fucked?" Shawn asked you.

"Hell yeah!" you replied.

The other wrestlers walking around you cheered "yyyeaaaahhh!", throwing their fists up in the air, some of them clapping their hands.

However, some of these wrestlers, you're not gonna bang tonight.

Sunny or some ringrats can bang them.

Maybe they can even imagine you doing it to them.

Plus, considering they've seen you get it on with other wrestlers, they probably think you have all kinds of STD's on you, and they don't wanna catch an STD from you, though Sunny and other ringrats are probably slutty too.

Once you were in the locker room, Shawn put his hands on your forearms and pushed you up against the lockers, albeit not violently and hard, and quickly leaned his face into yours, his lips landing and crashing onto yours.

Your eyes immediately closed once his lips locked on yours, and the two of you began making out with one another.

As the two of you were kissing each other, his tongue slid into your mouth like the cheeky fellow he is, and you were fine with his tongue sneaking into your mouth, you'd let your tongue get into his mouth as well (and it has been inside his mouth).

When he rammed his tongue in your mouth, your tongue shoved into his mouth as well, albeit not violently, and soon, your tongue and his tongue were licking each other, sliding and toppling atop of one another.

That wasn't all, since Shawn has such beautiful long locks, you moved your hand behind his head, managing to squeeze your hand between the locker and the back of Shawn's head, where your fingers ran down through his hair, his hair slipping down in between your fingers.

You love Shawn when his hair doesn't really look all that messy, and that's why you're running your fingers down his hair instead of letting your hand mess up his hair.

Shawn's hands snuck up your top, where his hands stopped at your tits, cupping your breasts, where he began caressing and squeezing your tits.

Your nipples were in between his index and middle fingers, where he squeezed your nipples a bit sometimes.

The top you were wearing was a black crop top that had little laces to be tied at the front to keep your top together, the outfit you're wearing is the same outfit Posh Spice wore on the cover of Rolling Stone magazine when the Spice Girls were on the cover this year.

His hands were making the little strings at the front of your top untie and undo, separating your top apart.

Some wrestlers were watching the two of you making out and they were very much enjoying it, some of them cheering you on and yelling "yyyyyyyyyyyeahhhhhhhh!!!", others not caring to view this.

Especially considering so many wrestlers hate Shawn for being a disrespectful douchebag during his heyday.

However, you really don't want Triple H and Billy to masturbate to this as well as other wrestlers you find hot to jerk off to this, and you have reasons why.

Though, some other wrestlers probably are masturbating to you making out with Shawn (and they'll probably masturbate to what's gonna happen later), though you don't want to watch other wrestlers jerk off, especially the really hideous ones.

While one of your hands is running your fingers down Shawn's hair, the other hand is pulling his tights down, exposing and freeing his erection from his tights.

Shawn contemplated in his mind if the two of you should have some foreplay before getting it on, maybe Shawn could have some foreplay.

Shawn's lips furiously slid from your lips down your neck, you could tell he was horny.

Before you released his erection out of his tights, you could feel his erection protruding through his tights and pressing through your crotch.

You could even see he had a little erection while walking down the hallway with him.

Your head leaned back when Shawn brushed his lips down the middle of your neck, his lips brushing down your skin sent chills and tingles down your body.

His lips traveled all around the front of your neck, his lips fumbling and brushing all around your neck, although he isn't gonna leave hickeys on your skin considering they'll be noticeable.

Since your character you play in the WWF is a horny slut, maybe in the future you could have hickeys on your neck and they're real ones.

Sometimes, Shawn let his breath out on your skin, and his breath felt so warm on your skin.

"Ohhhhhhhh Shawwwwwwn!" you whimpered, sounding a bit like those moaning women at the beginning of his entrance theme.

And speak of the devil, some wrestler in the locker room was reminded of those women at the beginning of his entrance theme, he chimed in.

"Aaaaaaaaaah, aaaaaaaaaaah, Shaaaaaawn!" he whined and mimicked, making fun of those women at the beginning of the song.

Some of the other wrestlers in the locker room laughed hearing that, but hopefully this doesn't kill the sexual mood between you and Shawn.

"I think I'm cute, I know I'm sexy!" another wrestler chimed in, his voice imitating Shawn's gravelly voice.

This was going on in the other side of the locker room.

And speaking of Shawn, he stopped at what he was doing, because he was both amused and annoyed at people making fun of you and him.

"Hey guys!" Shawn shouted, turning his head around and looking behind him, his face and voice serious. "Stop making fun of us! Don't kill the mood!"

If they wanna make fun of you and Shawn, they should go do it in another room.

Hopefully they won't try to get in a fight with Shawn, especially considering most of the locker room hates Shawn for being difficult to work with.

"Just ignore them" you suggested, opening your eyes. "Pretend they're not there"

Guess he could. He did it when the audience used to chant "Shawn is gay!".

"I admit, they are pretty funny" Shawn confessed, his face looking at you and his mouth smiling without showing his teeth. "Now, where were we?"

Shawn buried his face into your the middle of your neck again, putting his lips on your neck.

He loves hearing you moan, and I'm sure he's reminded of those women at the beginning of his entrance theme hearing you moan that out.

Shawn dragged his lips down to the middle of your chest, until he stopped at your breasts.

His hands grabbed onto the straps of your top at your shoulders, where he shed your top off of your shoulders and all the way down your arms, until your tits were completely bare for him.

You lifted your hands out of your top straps, and after that, Shawn put your top on the bench.

He shifted his face over to your left breast, where his hand on your left breast moved away from that tit, where he stopped at this breast, circulating his mouth around your nipple and began sucking it.

Your nipples are so sensitive, and he sometimes even let his breath out over your areola and nipple and ran the tip of his tongue around in circles over and over on your areola.

His other hand, meanwhile, still continued to squeeze your right breast and even slightly tweak your nipple.

"Ohhhhhhhhh Shaawnn!!" you cried out.

Since Shawn moved one of his hands out of the way to make way for his face, his hand previously on your left breast snuck under your miniskirt and panties, his fingers trying to find your pussy.

He felt something wet, squishy and plush, that wet thing obviously being your pussy.

The pads of his fingers rubbed up and down your clit, sometimes the pad of his thumb also pressed hard on your clit.

"Ohhhhhhhh Shaaaaaawn!!!" you whined and cried out.

"You're so fucking wet down there" Shawn purred, his voice warm and husky. "I can't wait to fuck you"

And you can't wait until his cock thrusts in and out of your pussy.

He flicked his tongue all around your areola and nipple, swirling his tongue in circles over and over again on your areola.

He also let his breath out over your areola and nipple.

"Shaaaaawn" you cried "This feels sooooo goooooood"

Shawn probably spent too much time on your left breast, so then he shifted his face and head towards his right breast, moving his hand on your right tit out of the way to make way for his face.

When his face was in front of your right breast, he proceeded to wrap his lips around the nipple, sucking it like he was breastfeeding.

That wasn't all he did, he also flicked his tongue all over your nipple and areola, doing it like he did with your left breast.

He ran the tip of his tongue in circles over and over again on your areola, sometimes he flattened his tongue and let the middle of his tongue lick over and over on your areola.

"Ohhh, yeahhhhhh, Shaaaaawn" you whined and cried, leaning your head back on the locker.

One of his hands was on your left breast, tweaking your nipple as well as playing with it, running circles around your areola with the pads of his fingers.

His hand under your miniskirt, meanwhile, lifted up from your skirt and panties, the tips of his fingers wet, juicy and creamy thanks to your pussy juice.

He's probably gonna get some pussy juice on your miniskirt and he doesn't want to do that.

He lifted his juice covered fingers up to his mouth, letting his fingers enter his mouth, where he sucked his fingers clean, his fingers now wet with his saliva instead of your pussy juice.

He could've just used his other hand on your tit that didn't go under your skirt.

Or...you could be the one pulling your skirt and panties down.

In fact, that's what Shawn decided.

He moved his hand from your left breast to your miniskirt, his fingers slipping under your miniskirt and thong straps on your hip.

His hand and fingers slid your skirt and panties down, trying to slide them down.

You could feel your miniskirt and even your panties slide down, which made you lift and straighten your head and look down, only to see Shawn beneath you trying to slide both of those articles of clothing down.

Previously, you could also feel his hand lift off of your breast, and you didn't precisely know why.

Shawn's eyes were also looking up at you, and he had to explain himself.

"Sorry" he apologized, your nipple still somewhat in his mouth, his facial expression and tone of voice not sounding so sexy.

He pulled his face a few inches away from your breast, a few inches until your nipple was out of his mouth.

"I wanted to take your skirt off" he confessed "But my other hand down your skirt had your pussy juices on my fingertips, and I was afraid I'd get my pussy juices on your skirt, so that's why I'm using my other hand to pull your skirt down".

"It's fine" you admitted, your facial expression and tone of voice not sounding sexual. "At least you care"

He smiled hearing that, and he has such an adorable smile.

"Thanks" he said, smiling.

"You're welcome" you replied.

You smiled right back at him, and you could have a hand in pulling your skirt and panties down.

You grabbed onto the right part of your miniskirt, your fingers slipping under your skirt and panties that hugged your right hip, and helped slide your skirt and panties down.

 He probably licked and sucked your right nipple for a long time, plus, there's other horny, eager men out there who want to fuck your pussy eventually, so Shawn should go onto the next thing.

That next thing was him stretching his neck out to the left, straightening his neck once his face and head was in the middle of your tits.

He buried his face in the middle of your chest, where he let his lips slide and caress down the middle of your torso and stomach.

The touch of his lips sliding down your skin felt so good, you leaned your head back, the back of your head touching the locker, and your eyes rolled in the back of your head.

"Mmmmmmmmm, yeahhhhhhhhh Shaaawn" you moaned.

He also let his breath out of his mouth as his lips slid down the middle of your torso.

He eventually stopped at your crotch area, and he's contemplating whether or not to eat your pussy out or not.

Yeah, he'll lick the juice off of your twat, but he wants your pussy to be slippery for him to enter.

Although, it will be slippery when he wets it with his tongue and saliva, maybe...

He put his other hand, specifically his fingers, under your skirt and thong strap you're trying to pull down, where he's trying to help pull your skirt down.

Your skirt and panties successfully slid down your legs, your head lifted up and looked down at your skirt.

You could feel Shawn's hand nudging your hand when he tried to put both of his hands down your skirt.

Once your skirt was on the floor, you lifted your feet out of the huge hole in your skirt as well as panties, where Shawn placed your skirt and panties on the bench.

Honestly, since you still have your heels on, you should probably take your heels off too.

"Shawn, let me do this first" you said to him.

"What?" he asked.

"Take my heels off" you replied.

You lifted one of your feet off of the floor and rested your calf on your knee, where you proceeded to take one of your heels off.

You slid the strap of your high heeled stiletto out of the buckle of your heel, then placed that high heel on the floor.

You then let your bare foot on the cold floor and lifted the other foot off of the floor, where you rested your foot on your knee, sliding the strap out of the buckle of your heel, only to place that other heel on the bench.

You didn't just want to drop your high heels on the floor, you're afraid they'll break!

Shawn could help you take your heels off, yet he didn't.

When both shoes were off of your feet, you then put both of your feet on the floor.

Shawn leaned his face into your vulva and buried his face there, his tongue escaping his mouth and slipping in between your thighs and vulva.

You could feel his tongue touch your pussy, and since he was going to eat your twat out, your thighs spread out a bit so he could bury his face in your cunt, letting his tongue go all around your pussy.

His tongue traveled up one of your vaginal flaps, tasting how salty but delicious it was.

He let his tongue go everywhere, his tongue caressed your pussy, licking your twat, tasting it.

He also wrapped his lips around your clit, where he started sucking your clit.

He didn't just also suck your clit, but let his tongue flick and swirl on your clit sometimes too.

Having so much stimulation on your clitoris, the most sensitive part of your vagina, felt so good.

"Ohhhhh Shaaaaaawn" you whined, your hand gripping onto his hair a bit, but not hard.

He also didn't just lick all around your pussy and suck your clit, but also let his breath out over your clit and your pussy, his breath was warm on your privates.

"Mmmmmmmm, Shaaaaawn!" you moaned, pulling his head closer to your cunt.

Your pussy was perfectly shaved, not a single bit of pubic hair on your twat, no bumps or stubble on your bikini line or on your pussy.

And Shawn loved this.

"You taste sooooo gooood" Shawn purred, his voice warm and husky. "You taste so sweet"

He could eat your pussy all day.

"Your breath feels so good on my clit" you complimented, your tone of voice sounding breathy and sexy.

Even though eating your twat out is wonderful and all, he shouldn't eat it way too much, his cock right now is dying to get some sexual release and to cum.

So what did he do?

He raised himself up from the floor, only to plop his ass on the wooden bench, patting his thighs for you to have a seat.

You opened your eyes and raised your head, opening your eyes when you felt Shawn's tongue and mouth not on your pussy anymore, only to see Shawn sitting on the bench, offering you a seat on his lap.

"Sorry" he apologized "My cock is dying to fuck you"

You should get to the fucking now, his cock definitely is begging for release and for fucking.

And, tonight, you were going to do some special things tonight...

You started to lower yourself to his lap, trying to aim your pussy hole to the top of his cock to enter.

You also put your hands on his shoulders so you could hold onto him as he fucked you.

When you lowered your ass down to sit on his lap, his cock slid into your pussy as you got further down to take a seat on his lap.

You didn't stop until his cock was completely inside of your pussy, and once his entire penis was inside your pussy, you sat there in his lap.

However, Shawn put his hands on your hips, only to lift you slightly up from his lap, more of his shaft was being exposed as your pussy went up his shaft.

But, that doesn't mean he's going to completely push you off of his cock.

When you reached almost the top of his cock (but not enough for his cock to not be inside your pussy), he completely pushed you back down to the bottom of his penis.

Pretty soon, you bounced and rode up and down his cock over and over again, his shaft slipping in and out of your pussy hole.

Thanks to his cock being inside your pussy hole, his shaft looked shiny.

Your tits were bouncing up and down as you rode up and down him, sadly, some of the wrestlers in the room couldn't see your tits bouncing considering you're holding onto his shoulders.

But maybe that's a good thing they can't see your tits, that way, they won't cum to this.

Your head was leaning back, your mouth was agape and your eyes were closed as you rode Shawn.

"Ohhhhhh Shaaaaaaaaawnn!" you moaned and cried.

"Just ride my cock, baby" Shawn purred and ordered, his voice husky and low.

Your moans filled the locker room, so much, that your moans and slapping noises your pussy and his cock were making were making some men in the locker room turn their heads, even if they were in other sections of the locker room, and look at the two of you, only to find you riding up and down Shawn's cock.

Speaking of other wrestlers, while they were watching Shawn fucking you, they were cheering this on, filling the locker room up with loud "yyyeaaaaaaaahhhhhh!!!" cheers and even some corny wolf whistles as they're called.

You heard one wrestler shout out "Get a room!", that wrestler looking disgusted on his

But you didn't see his disgusted facial expression, but you could tell by the tone of his voice he didn't want to look at this.

If he doesn't wanna look, then he could easily turn his head away and pretend the noise doesn't exist.

And we are in a room, technically. The locker room.

Some of the wrestlers watching you getting plowed by Shawn wanted to shove their cocks in your mouth or jerk off on you, but that's for another day.

They should (and are) trying to contain themselves for obvious reasons.

While Shawn was pumping his cock in and out of you, that wasn't all he did.

He put his hands on your tits, where he was tweaking and turning your nipples, your nipples so sensitive.

This was making you feel good even more, considering your nipples are so sensitive.

"Ohhhhh Shawnnn!!" you cried and moaned out.

While Shawn was in front of you, his face buried in your neck, where he let his breath out on your neck, his breath warm.

You could feel his warm breath on your body as he was fucking you, courtesy of him breathing heavily as he fucked you.

Sometimes his lips even fumbled and kissed your neck and shoulders, he was trying to make you feel good, and he was doing a very good job of it.

Such a good job, that finally after quite a long time of him fucking you, you came.

Your pussy had finally unleashed and released salty, gooey, creamy cum out of your pussy hole that's no doubt drenching the top of Shawn's penis head and the sides of his shaft.

Your clit was throbbing after you came.

However, the show isn't over until Shawn finally cums.

Shawn tried opening his eyes to look at your bouncing tits, considering you're bouncing up and down his cock, and his eyes could see his tits bouncing up and down with you.

As you continued riding on his cock, Shawn opened his eyes and tried to look at your bouncing tits.

Maybe your tits bouncing will help him finally cum.

Watching your breasts bounce up and down as you rode him made his cock even harder, and him pushing his cock in and out of your pussy over and over for quite a long time finally made him cum.

His hands gripped into your hips quite hard, the tips of his fingers digging into the flesh of your hips, and finally, his penis head finally burst out his official cum out of his penis.

His head leaned back, he released a mouth out of his agape mouth and his eyes were closed as he came.

Your face scrunched up as his fingertips dug into your skin, your mouth grimacing and eyes tightening shut, like you were in pain.

He let his seed leave out of his cock and inside your vagina, as well as let his penis sit inside your pussy once he came.

After he had came, he lifted you off of his lap, where his now flaccid penis flopped out of your vagina as you were lifted off of his lap.

His cock was now completely white, gooey, creamy and salty.

You'd love to clean that cock off, but you have a plan, and so do some other horny wrestlers as well.

Your face had also eased out when he lifted you off of his cock, your face no longer looking like it was in pain.

And as for your plan, you had to do something before it.

________________________________________________________________

Confession: I wanted to type this fanfic on Monday, which I did, but I had so many questions before finishing it (and it still isn’t finished!). 

[rawiswhore]

Various WWF Wrestlers x Fem Reader- “Blame It On the Alcohol”

The various WWF wrestlers: Shawn Michaels, Triple H, Billy Gunn, Jeff Hardy, Rob Van Dam, Davey Boy Smith and even Luna Vachon.

No, Luna doesn’t get naked with you or anything, but read the fic!

................................................................................................................................

At the beginning of 1998, the WWF's Attitude era had basically begun, and in 1998, they REALLY cranked the attitude up.

And what you're about to do during one particular WWF show at the beginning of 1998 will help prove the WWF has cranked their attitude up.

In front of thousands sitting in the seats, cameras swarming and filming around the ring, broadcasting this all around the world, and standing in the ring is none other than Luna Vachon, a woman who really is the epitome of a stereotypical female wrestler.

She wasn't a beautiful diva a la Sunny, Sable, Debra, Terri Runnels, and Trish Stratus, amongst other women in the future, but she was a woman who embodies almost everything a female wrestler, specifically a stereotypical female wrestler, should be.

Big, burly, ugly and scary.

Luna's been wrestling for several years, but at the end of 1997 and beginning of 1998, she's really having her time to shine in the WWF.

She's standing in the ring, a microphone over her jet black lips, her face looking angry, aggressive and intimidating.

"Y/n!!!" she shouts, dragging the end of your name out, her voice gravelly and rough.

No response.

"I said, y/n!!!!" she shouted again.

"Where could she be?" Jerry Lawler shrieked, his face not shown onscreen.

"Come out, come out, wherever you are!" Luna rasped.

No response.

"Where's y/n?" Jerry asked, his voice high and shrill.

Soon, the titantron cut to Michael Cole, holding a microphone, a camera filming him, where he was looking everywhere for you, opening doors in hallways, even though all of this was staged and scripted, as is pro wrestling in general.

He soon heard some shouting coming from one room, and he (and everyone else) knew about what a big, outrageous slut you were.

He turned the doorknob, pulling open the door, only to find you dancing on top of a round, circle shaped table, while a hoard of people, many of them pro wrestlers, swarmed this table, chanting "go y/n! Go y/n! Go y/n!" over and over again, raising their hands and pumping their fists in the air.

Wrestlers you were sexually attracted to and hanged with (Triple H, Shawn Michaels, Billy Gunn, Jeff Hardy, even Davey Boy Smith/the British Bulldog and Rob Van Dam) and wrestlers you weren't sexually attracted to (Road Dogg, Matt Hardy and X Pac) were standing next to the table you were dancing on, as well as a few men you knew and even dated in high school and college.

You let Davey Boy, Jeff and RVD make little guest appearances again in the WWF this month because they’re both so damn hot.

There were even some women swarming the table, two of them are Sunny and Chyna, but the majority of women were girls you were friends with since you were a kid.

Their chants were so loud, they didn't even hear the door open.

The camera zoomed in on you dancing, and speaking of loudness, the people in the audience, especially males (both grown men and underage teenage boys) immediately got out of their seats, cheering and yelling their asses off, holding up posters related to you.

Some of the males in the audience heard the people standing by the table chanting "go y/m! Go y/n! Go y/n!" over and over again, and they chanted along, chanting "Go y/n! Go y/n!" and pumping their fists in the air.

"There she is!" Jerry Lawler shrieked.

You were dressed in a bikini top, miniskirt and stiletto heels, your hips were swaying back and forth quite quickly and your hands and arms were up in the air.

Since there were chairs surrounding this table, you walked to the edge of the table and put one foot down on the table, then the other, walking off of the table by using the chair to help you get down to the floor.

When you were standing on the carpet, you continued dancing, this time in front of Triple H, grinding and rolling your ass up his jeans, and Shawn Michaels, whose face was shaved (thank God), his hair was hanging down, and he was holding a huge vodka bottle, shaking that vodka bottle back and forth as he walked up to you.

Once he stood right in front of you, he popped the cork off of the bottle, where the vodka spilled out of the bottle and onto your chest, where the vodka dripped down your chest.

He tilted that bottle on your chest, pouring a bit more vodka on your chest, where the vodka dripped down your torso, some of it dripped down your body like a raindrop down a window.

This got an even bigger pop out of the male audience, yelling and shouting "yyyyyyeaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!", even the men swarming you were chanting "yyyyyyyyeaaaaaaaaaahhh!", having huge, wide, ear-to-ear smiles across their faces.

Some of the people in the audience were chanting "HBK! HBK! HBK!" over and over again.

Billy Gunn, who still had long hair and hadn't joined D Generation X yet, yanked the bottle out of Shawn's hand by gripping it by the handle, and helped pour some more vodka on your neck and on your chest.

Seeing Davey Boy Smith/the British Bulldog and Rob Van Dam make little guest appearances also is what made people (both males and females) get out of their seats, feeling so happy to see them again.

Davey, Rob and Jeff were even reaching their hands out and gripping the bottle's shaft, helping pour it not just on your neck and chest, but even on your face and lips.

The 3 of them were looking like they were all enjoying this, so did Billy Gunn, for that matter.

Everyone in the room looked like they were having a good time and enjoying this.

Your lips were getting dampened and wet as they poured vodka on your lips, some of the vodka even dripping out of your mouth, you tried to gulp that vodka down and hopefully not choke on it.

The men in the audience yelled and shouted out "yyyyyyyyyeaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh!!!" while these men poured vodka on you.

Even Triple H couldn't help but grab onto the bottle's shaft, yanking it from the other 3 men, where their fingers slipped from gripping on the bottle.

Trips poured some more vodka on your chest, almost emptying the bottle, laughing and smiling as he did this, trying to stay in character, even though he didn't drink alcohol in real life.

Shawn, Billy, Rob, Jeff and even Davey Boy Smith leaned their faces into your chest and neck, where they stuck their tongues out, pressing their tongues on your body, and licked up the alcohol on your chest.

The camera zoomed in and filmed these men licking the vodka off of your body, where their tongues were visible to the audience.

The people in the audience immediately cheered equally loud as they all got turns to lick your body.

This moment was making the audience forget all about Luna and more about you.

But most of the audience probably hates Luna, considering she's a burly, unsexy woman with a scary, gravelly voice, most of the male audience love oversexualized, skinny, bimbo divas like Sable.

Just look at how much men used to jeer at Chyna for looking like a man.

While this was going on, Michael Cole walked up to the hoard of people pouring and licking vodka on you, some of the men could see Michael walking to you.

One of them walked out of the swarm of people and up to Michael, looking pissed off.

He pushed Michael out of the way.

"Hey, fuck off!" the man shouted, putting his middle finger up at him.

"I'm trying to interview her!" Michael argued.

"Well not now!" the man fired back, pushing him out of the way.

The camera filming you and these hoard of men was now filming the little scuffle between a man and Michael Cole, whereas the rest of the men were too busy pouring vodka on you.

You didn't want anyone interrupting this moment you were sharing and indulging in.

Luna, meanwhile, was standing in the ring, patiently waiting, although getting annoyed you wouldn't answer back.

Speaking of indulgence, you turned your body around, this time grinding and rolling your ass on Shawn's crotch, and not just Shawn's genitals, but you swung your hips back and forth on Billy Gunn's crotch and tried to dance on Rob, Davey Boy and Jeff's crotches as well.

While this was all going on, Triple H held the bottle straight so it wouldn't spill, now it was his turn to lick your body.

He leaned his face closer to your body, where he licked up your chest and neck, his tongue going up the upper half of your body.

Some of the other men, like a few guys you dated in college and high school as well as some hot wrestlers like Shawn, Jeff and Billy, leaned their faces into your skin, your flesh, your body, where they licked the vodka off of your neck and body.

While these men were licking the vodka off of your body, you grabbed the bottle Triple H was holding and put it to your lips, drinking and gulping the vodka straight from the bottle.

You wanted the hot, sexy men to lick the alcohol off of your body and for you to grind your hips and ass on these hot men's laps, all until it was over.

Even though this was scripted, Michael Cole had enough of this.

He stormed right in the room, where he shook you on the shoulder.

Him shaking your shoulder made your head turn and stop at what you were doing.

The men surrounding you looked really pissed off at Michael, Shawn and Triple H stormed to Michael like they wanted to beat him up, the 2 of them both having angry expressions on their faces.

The men in the audience began booing Michael severely, angry at this.

"Wait!" Michael interrupted, holding one of his hands out. "Luna wants to speak to her!"

Michael pointed at you when he said that.

"Tell Luna she can wait!" Triple H argued.

"No I won't!" Luna growled.

She's a woman but she could easily tear Triple H limb from limb.

If Luna wanted to talk with you, why didn't she come up to you instead?

There's only one reason this segment exists: so the audience can see you dance with hoards of men and lick the alcohol off of your body.

Michael then grabbed you by the wrist, pulling you out of the room, where you stumbled as Michael dragged you out of the room, much to the dismay of the men behind you.

Some of the men, specifically the wrestlers like Shawn and Triple H, marched up to Michael, looking angry, but even you felt like they licked enough vodka off of your body and you lapdanced them enough.

"Guys!" you shouted to them, turning your heads and looking at them "You've had enough"

Michael Cole could breathe a sigh of relief of you saying that.

Once he pulled you out of the room, you leaned on Michael, trying not to fall on the floor.

He held the microphone up to you.

"Now that I can see you!" Luna shrieked, looking angry and pissed off. "Hey y/n!!!!!"

Her voice dragged the end of your name out.

"What?!" you shouted back.

“You know where to find the boys AND the booze!” Luna fired, referencing a quote from “Mommy Dearest”.

She then began ranting at you, wanting a match with you because she was tired of you and your sluttiness.

She could obviously kick your ass, but you had something to say back to her.

"Not now, I'm too drunk!" you slurred. "Why don't you go pick on someone your own size?"

Your quip got a huge pop out of the audience, especially the men in the audience, considering you were busy partying.

Luna wasn't having any of it, and she wanted to rip you to shreds.

“Keep drinkin’ that booze” Luna said “And you’ll have a voice and a face like mine!”

She pointed to her face, and she’s not exactly Stacy Keibler in the beauty department, or has a voice pleasant on the ears.

It’s a shame you don’t know what “Rocko’s Modern Life” is, considering you were an adult during the 1990′s “too old” to be watching Nickelodeon and not really watching it besides maybe “Ren and Stimpy” and an occassional “Rugrats” episode to see what the hype is about.

Because Luna does vocally sound like a scarier Bev Bighead.

I’m sure the 90′s kids who grew up watching “Rocko” and who watched the WWF during this moment and era would immediately love and laugh at you calling her “Bev Bighead”, even some adults who watched “Rocko” with their kids could laugh at that.

Even though you were drunk, you and Luna ended up having a match, where Luna won.

She could easily kick your ass, anyway.

This segment where you're dancing and partying with various men licking the vodka off of you, you've had parties like that, not just in college before (and after) you joined the WWF, but when you were in the WWF, you've had parties where you've danced whorishly on all of these male wrestlers you think are sexy, dancing with them while they poured alcohol on you and licked it off of you.

This moment was inspired by a "Fresh Prince of Bel Air" episode where Will watches over a British lady who acts very posh, proper, demure with her family (and Will's family), but when the family isn't there, she's a naughty, slutty party girl wild child who runs off to a tough bar and dances on tables!