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#I’m a diffeeent person it’s wrong. it’s probably not even me who misses them
cherrysnax
·
1 year
Text
I’ve been. having dreams about people we used to know
#it’s been getting so bad that if it’s not about family it’s about people from rush
#high school was yeeeears ago
#and I’m the one who
#who disappeared and stuff so like if this is some sort of guilt I don’t get it
#there’s an anger there that’s not mine
#I didn’t make the choice but I let it happen so
#I’m just as guilty
#I don’t get to miss shadows of people who probably didn’t like me as much as I thought
#the bpd brain always wonders why does everyone leave me but the ration brain knows that I always do it first
#always always always. and it’s wrong and it’s fucked up and I don’t get to miss people I honestly really never knew
#I’m a diffeeent person it’s wrong. it’s probably not even me who misses them
#if I’m lonely it’s because I chose to be. If I’m sad it’s because I chose to be and I do not deserve to feel like I was abandoned
#it wasn’t my choice but I went along with it so I’m just as guilty
#mental illness tag
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