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#I’m baaaaaaack!!!
amariaarts · 7 days
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wisdom
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corniart · 1 year
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Ofc I would fall into CR hole in 2023.
Have this flamboyant gnc tiefling. I love him.
On another note I have officially moved into my new place!!!! More than 8 months of planning, and experiencing every single gotdamn inconvenience, I finally made it from coast to fucking coast! So this is my first drawing on my Wacom since February and i have missed her so so so dearly
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okboomer17 · 4 months
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… will miss you so so so much, super Jen 💔 thank you for everything
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sukunas-wife · 2 months
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Oh, so you fantasize about me?
Let your little mind wander and fantasize about all the things you could do,
Think of all the things we could do together, how you could please me so adequately
I could bring you to your knees with such few words, you entice me with your little fantasies
HABDIJEKSOSLVDBD
Please there’s a Sukuna IN MY ASK BOX 😭😭
Tell me more 🥺🥺😭 TELL ME ANYTHING
My husband? 👀 OUR HUSBAND??? 👀👀👀
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Andrews brain can be accurately depicted by that one Bo Burnham bit that’s like
I am the Left Brain, I am the Left Brain
I work really hard until my inevitable death brain
You got a job to do, you better do it right
In the right way with the Left Brain's might
I like Oreos and pussy sketchy redheads running from the mafia
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bigassmoonchild · 7 months
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how tf you spell this
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dancingisdangerouss · 11 months
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So obviously I’ve got some splainin’ to do 😬
The short version is that I’ve been dealing with a lot of shit this past year that seems to keep piling and getting higher and more difficult to dig my way out of, and I’ve been struggling to get back into writing. It’s a big coping skill of mine, but I’ve had trouble with being able to reignite that fire.
I think the plagiarism set things in motion, and from there I just felt deflated and defeated. It hurts, man. Especially knowing that I was never able to resolve anything. But I like to believe in karma, so while I’m not terribly vindictive, I do hope in the future for an eye-for-an-eye situation so that they’ll know how much it sucks to have your work stolen.
That said, I am getting back into it. But I wanted to actually have something to show for it before “officially” returning to being active and dusting this account off. I can’t promise to be as active as I was originally (I also have weird and longer work hours now), but I am going to try and do my best to keep updates somewhat consistent, as much as I can.
Love you all 💚
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singe-sear · 5 months
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Hey guys! I wanted to do a proper comeback bc just a Miku drawing ain’t cutting it. So…how have y’all been? It’s been so long since I’ve been gone…it feels like it’s been forever, but now I’m BACK! I deleted the app bc I had to focus on my studies, but then I saw that…it literally made no difference if I was on this app or not, bc I still had the same screen time, so why get off a platform that I love? So yeah, I’m finally back. And ima make up for lost time, that’s a promise!
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ask-magical-john · 1 year
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Has the team met your kids yet?
no… theeeeey’re sssssstill biting. caaaan’t have the teaaaam getting poiiiiisoned.
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ghostsofbeverlydr · 9 months
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inactive for a while and now i gotta sweep out all the new porn blogs following me smh
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seventhefurbfather · 1 year
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oh god,, i just got to route six,, i can feel the direction that sword and shield is going and it is hurting my soul,, hop come back,,,
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cinnamon-stuff · 1 year
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HI I’M BACK
uhh I have three things to say
I’m still sad, i’m excited for the new toh episode and if it doesn’t go well I’m going to be very angry, and I finally watched puss and boots the last wish and I loved it! Ok bye
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jobean12-blog · 1 year
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Crazy Little Thing Called Love
Pairing: Joel Miller x reader (Biker!Joel AU)
Word Count: 2,228
Summary: Joel’s been away on a trip and when he returns you’re the only thing on his mind (just like you were the whole time he was gone). 
Author’s Note: He’s baaaaaaack because I’m in love and while this is related to my other two Biker!Joel stories you can find on his Masterlist HERE you don’t need to read them for this one. Thank you all so much for reading! Much love always! ❤️❤️❤️Divider by the sweet @firefly-graphics thank you love! 
Warnings: lots of fun, flirty fun and soft fluffy fluff 
Thank you to Esquire for these amazing photo! 🥰
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Joel Miller Masterlist
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“Are you ever going to give that back to him?” your friend Dan asks as you shrug on the soft leather jacket.
You press your nose to the collar and inhale, lifting your shoulders with a contented sigh before replying, “nope!” with a pop of the p.
“He’s already outside” your other friend and coworker, Jade exclaims excitedly.
It had been a long and boring week of work at the bar and no Joel. He had been away on a trip and had only just returned today.
His first stop was you.
You grab your small bag and rush out the door of the backroom, waving goodbye before nearly running to the front door of the bar.
You can already hear the rev of engines and when you step into the afternoon sunshine you immediately look for him.
When at first you don’t spot him your eyes move to the row of bikes and you scope them out, certain you’ll be able to find his quickly.
Then your eyes land on the black and sleek bike, big, but not overly decorated and with giant shiny tailpipes off the back.
“Hi sunshine.”
You spin around and meet his eyes.
A week was too long.
His broad shoulders and muscular arms are on full display and his thick thighs are straining against his tight dark wash jeans.
His eyes hold you hostage and you feel a rush of warmth all over your body before you launch yourself into his arms. He catches you easily and buries his face in your neck.
“Joel,” you whisper, finally releasing your tight grip and sliding down his body.
He wastes no time kissing you and you hear the loud whistles and whoops of the rest of the guys behind you.
Your fingertips slip into his vest and you brush them over his warm skin, toying with his chain. You give it a light tug and he moans against your lips, sliding his hands down to your ass.
The hollers get louder.
“As much as these fuckers would love a show, I ain’t givin’ it to ‘em darlin’,” he grumbles, but his expression is warm. “Been waiting to see you all week. Let’s go.”
You wave at the guys over his shoulder and get nods and winks in return before Joel grabs your helmet.
“Thank fuck we’re back,” one of the guys yells in Joel’s direction. “We’ve had to deal with his grumpy ass for a week!”
You barely contain your giggle but try to hide your face in Joel’s chest.
“Yeah, yeah, laugh it up fuckers,” he scoffs and then dips his head to kiss your smiling lips.
When you lift your head he plops his helmet on top and throws you a lopsided smirk.
You ignore the guys and the rest of their playful jabs and ask, “how come you never wear one?”
“I do,” he says, “for longer rides.”
“Then how come I have to?” you pout.
“Because if anything happened to his beautiful face I’d never forgive myself,” he simpers before grabbing your chin and kissing you again.
“And we need to zip this up, the wind is chilly.”
He pulls his jacket more tightly around your body and takes the zipper between his fingers, slowly dragging it up.
“Dan asked if I was ever going to give his back to you…I’ve been wearing it all week and I plan on keeping it.”
You smile with feigned innocence and he tugs you closer until his lips are brushing yours and whispers, “good, this way everyone knows you belong to me.”
His words send a shiver down your spine and you press yourself against him with a kiss.
When you break apart he gives your waist a squeeze and chases your lips before throwing his leg over his bike.
He adjusts himself and revs the engine, your breath hitching at how good he looks straddling it.
“Darlin’” he warns, throwing you a no-nonsense look. “Get on.”  
You get on behind him and wrap your arms around his stomach.
You’ve gotten used to riding with him but even so nothing compares to when the bike first roars to life and he gets out onto the road to really open the throttle.
You don’t even know where you’re going but it doesn’t matter as you press yourself against his back and enjoy the ride.
He slows when you reach a familiar spot off road and when he pulls down the dirt path and kills the engine your whole face lights up in a smile.
“Are we having another picnic?” you ask when he takes off your helmet.
“Yea we are sunshine,” he answers as he opens one of the saddlebags and pulls out a blanket and a small cooler bag.
You follow him to a spot behind the trees, shady but still sprinkled with the sun’s rays that filter through the leaves. Rolling hills lay in front of you, the pale yellows, vivid greens, and colorful flowers giving them texture and depth.
“It’s so beautiful,” you whisper. “I’ll never get tired of looking at it.”
“It is darlin’,” he replies softly, “and neither will I.”
Feeling the heat of his eyes on your face, you turn to look at him and feel the breath leave your body at the intensity of his stare and when you realize the implication of his words it almost makes you sway on your feet.
He tears his eyes away and lays out the blanket, unloading the bag of goodies.
The moment he settles on the blanket you sit and crawl over to him until he has you in his lap, his arms circling you and his hands smoothing along your back.
“You have no idea how much I’ve missed you,” he groans against your lips.
Your fingertips comb through his hair and you wiggle in his lap, feeling just how true his words are.
“Actually I do,” you answer with a grin.
He growls playfully and grabs you around the waist, making a smooth move to flip you over and lay you on your back.
“Mm but now I’m gonna show you just how much darlin’.”
And with desperation you match, he kisses you, hungry and with intention as his fingers dance along your inner thigh.
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The late afternoon sun is still warm but your bare skin pebbles in the cool breeze. Joel grabs his jacket and drapes it over you, cradling you closer to his chest.
“I need to feed you,” he whispers but doesn’t move.
His free hand is resting behind his head and his other is wrapped around you, his features soft and his eyes closed.
You stare and reach out to stroke his cheek, feeling the welcome soft bristle of his beard against your fingertips.
He catches your hand and brings it to his lips, pressing a sweet kiss to the back of it. When he releases you, you can’t resist the urge to brush your fingers over his mouth.
Drawing your thumb down his lower lip, you ask, “what’s your favorite color?”
“What?” he asks, bemused.
“Your favorite color? What is it?”
“Hmm,” he muses, looking up at the sky.
Then he lifts a finger and points. “That color.”
“Sky blue,” you say. “Good choice.”
“Yours sunshine?”
“The color of the ocean…turquoise I guess you would call it.”
“I love being by the ocean,” he says softly.
Your fingers move down to his chest and you trace his tattoo before curling them around his chain.
“Favorite book?”
This time he doesn’t wait a moment in answering and says, “The Count of Monte Cristo. I love a good adventure book.”
“That’s one of the best,” you agree, mulling over your answer as he waits to hear it.
“This is a hard one for me,” you explain. “I love books.”
He tucks you closer and ghosts his fingers over your skin, not seeming to care if you take all afternoon to decide.
“The Princess Bride,” you finally say.
“Another adventure and a love story” he adds.
“You’ve read it?” you ask excitedly.
“Definitely. It’s on my top ten list,” he answers.
You settle into him and think of another question as you fingers continue to move over his bare skin.
“Do you want another tattoo?”
He quirks a brow and silently watches your fingers as they smooth over the outline of the ink on his skin.
“I’m sure I’ll get another,” he says, “’specially since you seem to like ‘em so much.”
He grins at you before he winks and gives you a soft kiss.
“What’s the best trip you’ve ever taken on your bike?”
He considers the question for a few seconds and then turns to study your face.
“This trip. This is the best.”
“Joel,” you whisper, your lips parting to say more but he silences any further words with his mouth, the kiss soft and tender before he pulls away and asks, “favorite food?”
Your lips turn up into a smile and you tap your chin.
“Probably pizza…no! Pancakes! Well, maybe waffles? Chicken wings!”
He starts to laugh and rolls you over so he’s settled between your legs and has you pinned to the blanket.
“I think you’re hungry sunshine. Time to eat.”
“But what about you? What’s yours?” you ask as you start to get yourself dressed.
He watches you, his lips twitching with a grin.
“Dessert.”
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Once your stomach is full and Joel’s had his dessert, you stretch out on the blanket with a happy sigh.
“You ready for a riding lesson darlin’,” Joel drawls as he absentmindedly runs his calloused fingertips along your arm.
You sit up with widened eyes.
“ME? Ride…your bike?”
“You want to learn right?” he teases. “And I have one more place I want to take you before the sun sets.”
“Maybe you should just ride…it’s probably safer.”
“Nah, come on darlin,’ you can do it.”
He packs up your things and secures them in the saddlebags before helping you into your helmet. His leather jacket is already cocooning you in his warmth and smell but you don’t budge from the spot next to his bike.
“You know how to get on,” he says lightly.
You let out an exhale and look down at your feet.
Strong fingers grip your chin and he lifts your eyes. “Sunshine, you’re gonna be fine and I’m going to be right there with you. I wouldn’t let you ride if I thought it wasn’t ok.”
You nod with renewed determination and swing a leg over the bike. It’s harder to get situated without Joel’s body and it takes you a minute to find your balance.
“Ok, so now what?” you ask, staring at the handlebars.
No answer.
“Joel?”
You turn to catch him staring at you, his eyes dark.
“Sorry darlin,’ but fuck if that isn’t hot as hell…hang on.”
He pulls out his phone and snaps a picture before he drinks you in one last time and saunters over to help.
He explains what all the necessary buttons and levers are and shows you how to start the engine and walk the bike around a bit.
It’s much too big and heavy for you but he’s at your side the whole time and he’s patient and sweet.
“You’re doing so well darlin.’ Gonna have to get you your own bike soon.”
You beam under his praise and he slides on behind you, cradling you between his thighs and resting his arms on either side of yours.
“This isn’t the safest,” he starts, “in fact it’s illegal to ride this way, but it’s just a short trip to where we’re going and it’ll give you a feel of what it’s like to be in the front seat.”
He kisses your neck and holds you securely between his muscular thighs before starting the engine and taking off at a slow speed. You squeal in delight and put your face to the wind.
The short trip takes you uphill until you hit a secluded and narrow road that leads to a dead end.
You don’t hear it until Joel shuts the engine and you take off your helmet.
The smell of the salty sea air and the crash of the waves takes over and you walk to the edge of the small cliff to look down.
The ocean sweeps out to the horizon, it’s blue color dotted with sparkling diamonds every time the sun catches a wave’s crest. Rugged rocks line the shore below and the pink and orange hues of the setting sun glow brightly against the darkening sky.
“It’s not quite turquoise,” Joel whispers as he slides up behind you and wraps you in his arms, holding you against his chest.
“But it’s so beautiful,” you finish as you snuggle closer.
“You’re so beautiful,” he says as he turns you in his arms and draws you closer.
“I don’t know why all the guys say you’re so grumpy,” you tease lightly. “You’re such a softie.”
He leans in close, his nose bumping yours before he catches your mouth in a long, slow kiss that leaves you breathless and shaky.
When he pulls away he holds your gaze and it’s like a warm caress that sweeps over your skin. Something sparkles in his eyes, something familiar and his voice is rough with emotion when he murmurs, “I love you sunshine.’”
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@sstan-hoe @blackwidownat2814​ @justkinsey​ @laineyreads​ @beccablogsthings​ 
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sarahwroteathing · 1 year
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It’s the Great Pumpkin, Steve Rogers!
[Art Teacher!Steve Rogers x Single Mom!Reader]
Word Count: 3417
Warnings: single mom reader, chaotic bestie Bucky Barnes
Summary: While painting faces at the local harvest festival, Steve sees you and Charlie outside of school for the first time.
A/N: I’m baaaaaaack! Did ya miss me?
Here’s the previous three installments in the Glitterverse, in case you missed them or need a refresh!
Glitter  Cool Kid Table  Silver Star
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Steve was in the very serious process of adding purple stripes to a charmingly cartoonish spider he’d painted on a little boy’s cheek when the sound of a bright, happy laugh caught his attention. There was nothing too unusual about that, honestly. He liked seeing people happy, whether he knew them or not, and there had been no shortage of happiness at the Harvest Festival so far. 
The apple bobbing tent was a pretty reliable source of laughter of the triumphant, self-deprecating, and “No, I swear, I’m not laughing at you” varieties.
The pumpkin carving tables were another happiness hotspot as people giggled over each other’s designs and gave the nervous laughs of people utterly unsure of the sharp implements they were holding. 
 This particular laugh came from the exit of the corn maze, and Steve did his very best to ignore the little flutter in his chest when he recognized you, cozy and carefree in an oversized sweater and scarf, spinning a giggling Charlie in increasingly wobbly circles until you both fell onto a nearby hay bale.
“We did it!” he heard you shout, raising both arms above your head.
Charlie’s voice was too soft to catch at this distance, but whatever she said made you laugh again and tug her against your side.
“Excuse me? Are you done?” 
Steve’s eyes snapped forward again, and he fought a flush of embarrassment as he smiled at the boy who was now starting to squirm restlessly on his stool.
“Sorry, almost,” he said. “One second.”
Steve added one last stripe before setting down his paintbrush and reaching for the small mirror tucked between the paint bottles and paper cups. He held it up with a playful flourish that earned him a giggle.
“What do you think?”
The boy inspected his cheek closely, squinting his eyes for a moment before giving a decisive nod.
“It’s good.”
Steve gave the boy a parting smile as he raced back to his grandfather, who was waiting near the donation table and chatting with Bucky. 
The same Bucky Barnes, best friend and bane of his existence, who was now cheerfully waving them off and approaching Steve with such a casual smile that it was immediately suspicious. 
“That last one was barely even a masterpiece, Steve. Are you okay? Coming down with something?”
“Still better than you could do,” he said pointedly, rearranging the paint bottles and rinsing off the brushes he’d used. 
“Rude. I knew something was going on with you,” Bucky said, plopping himself down on a stool and fixing Steve with an expectant look. 
“No, there's not. Now move unless you want me to paint your face.”
“Are you sure you could focus for long enough to paint my face?”
Steve narrowed his eyes. 
“What are you talking about?”
Bucky only smiled.
“I have this sixth sense that tells me when scary things are happening. Like when all the birds go quiet. Or the clouds look freaky. Or Steve Rogers stares longingly at a woman.”
“What are you- I wasn’t-”
“You. Staring. Beautiful woman. I saw it.” 
And Steve knew full well he was betraying himself by glancing towards you again, but it was an impulse he didn’t have time to suppress. You were at a stall this time, talking cheerfully with a baker, a basket hanging from the crook of your arm and Charlie’s hand in yours.
“I’m not… staring. I just…”
You were laughing again, and the baker, a rosy cheeked older woman, handed a loaf of bread over the table to you with a fond smile. 
“Wait, do you know her?” Bucky demanded, recapturing Steve’s attention when he smacked him on the arm. 
“I… yeah.” 
Now well into October, Steve not only saw you every weekday, he also occasionally texted you on weekends. It was never much, only instigated when one of you happened across something that reminded you of the other person. A picture of the mug of apple cider that Bucky had unceremoniously dumped way too much edible glitter in. A picture of your kitchen table covered in old newspapers to protect it from your and Charlie’s watercolor experiments. It was nothing, really. But it made him happy.
“Her?” Bucky repeated, brows raising as he turned to look over his shoulder at you.
“Ye- Please, stop pointing. Yes.”
“Fluffy sweater, cute kid? Her?”
“Bucky.”
“Looking like she just stepped out of a fairytale with a basket of apples, bread, and what I assume is jars of either honey or jam or both?”
“Why are you freaking out?” Steve sighed.
“Because you didn’t tell me about her!”
Steve pursed his lips. “I wasn’t aware you wanted to hear about all my students’ parents.”
Bucky was thoroughly unamused.
“Steve. You told me when you changed dish soap, but you didn’t tell me that you’re now living a romance novel. What the fuck is wrong with you?” 
“Hey!” Steve said, wacking him with a roll of paper towels. “Bucky, there are kids.”
“What the fudgesicle is wrong with you?” Bucky repeated in an identical tone.
“My life is not a romance novel. Take it easy. We’re just friends.”
“Oh, I’m sure you are,” he answered with a humorless laugh. “But you didn’t tell me about her. Which means you’re considering something that you’re not sure you should be considering. And you knew that if you told me, I would easily talk you into it.”
Steve took a moment to process that, glancing over at you again and straightening up in surprise when he caught your eye. You smiled, wide and genuine, raising a hand in a greeting that he quickly mirrored.
“That’s ridiculous,” Steve said quickly when you had turned away again, only half paying attention now because you were talking to Charlie, gesturing in his direction.
“I agree. But I’m right.”
You were walking their way now, and this conversation needed to be over right now.
“Has anyone ever told you that you’re a pain in the ass?”
“Steven. Please. The children.”
“Has anyone ever told you you’re a pain in the apple?” 
“You. Fairly often. And Sam even more often. But luckily his opinion means nothing to me.”
And while there were a hundred things Steve would love to say about that, there wasn’t time.
“Bucky, I swear, we can talk about it for as long as you want later, but right now I need you to act like a normal human being,” he said urgently. 
“Is she right behind me?”
“About to be.”
“Fine.”
Bucky plastered on an only slightly manic smile as he turned to greet you. 
“Hello! Interested in some face paint?”
You seemed caught off guard by the exuberant greeting, but recovered quickly.
“I think so, yes. How much?”
“Free! But we’re also collecting donations for the Woodbridge Elementary art program.”
“I see,” you said, eyes flickering to Steve for a moment. “Well, we kinda like the art program, don’t we?”
“Yep!” Charlie said, also peeking around Bucky to offer a tiny smile to Steve.
“Alright then. Go ahead and tell Steve what you want, and I’ll take care of the money stuff.”
You followed Bucky a few steps away to the donation table, and Charlie skipped up to him.
“Hi,” she said, waiting for him to pat the open stool before sitting down.
“Hi, Charlie. Know what you want yet, or do you want to look at some pictures?”
“Umm…” Her forehead scrunched a little as she thought. “Can you do a cat with a witch hat? Is that too hard? You can just do a pumpkin if that’s too hard.”
“Well, I think a cat with a witch hat is an awesome idea!” Steve said with a smile. “I’ll do my best, and if it doesn’t turn out right, we can try something else. Sound good?”
“Sounds good,” she said with a nod.
Steve set out some clean brushes, a new cup of water, and a clean paper towel. 
“What color cat?”
“Orange?”
He nodded, setting up little dixie cups of orange, black, yellow, brown, and green paint.
“Alright, are you ready? It’s going to feel a little cold.”
“I’m ready! I’ll be real still,” she vowed, clenching her hands into determined little fists on her knees.
Steve started with a few dabs of color until Charlie relaxed a little, used to the sensation.
“Are you having fun at the festival?” he asked a few moments later, tracing the outline of a cat on her cheek.
“Yeah! We did the maze without a map! And we got bread for later. Mom’s making spaghetti for dinner!”
“Yum! Do you like spaghetti?”
“It’s my favorite. Mom always makes cheesy bread.”
“Well, this is going to be a good day then, huh? What else are you going to do?”
“Umm, we still have to pick our pumpkins! And, there are these earrings mom really likes over at the corn maze, but she won’t buy them. I think she should buy them.”
“Oh yeah?” Steve glanced over at the stall near the entrance to the corn maze. He’d spoken to that woman before a few times. She was a local artist who liked to make jewelry and print her abstract watercolor art on scarves. “What do they look like?”
“Like shiny green rocks and little gold leaves. She’ll look like a fairy.”
Steve smiled at the admiration in her voice, but before he could say anything, you wandered back over with Bucky.
“Oh my goodness. Charlie, you’re a masterpiece!” 
She smiled proudly as Steve added a last little detail to the cat’s witch hat before leaning back.
“All done,” he said, holding up the mirror for her. “What do you think?”
Her eyes widened along with her smile.
“It’s perfect! Thank you!”
“You’re very welcome.”
“Your turn,” Charlie said, hopping up from the stool and nudging you towards it.
“Is that allowed?” you laughed.
“If you want, then of course it is,” Steve said with an easy smile.
You turned to Charlie, smiling at her eager nod.
“Alright then. What should I get?”
“We could match! Or get an even bigger cat. Ooo! A tiger!”
“You heard the lady. One tiger in a witch hat, please,” you laughed, dropping into the stool beside Steve and setting your basket and purse down on the ground beside you.
“Mama, can I get my book?” Charlie asked, eyes on your purse.
“Yeah, of course. Big pocket.”
“There’s an extra chair at the donation table if you don’t mind sitting next to me,” Bucky told her as she liberated her book from your very full purse.
Charlie smiled a little shyly and nodded, following Bucky back to the donation table with a parting wave to you.
“How did I end up with the best kid in the world?” you asked, eyes following Charlie as Steve set up the paints.
“Mm, you and Tony might have to fight about that one.”
“Aw, Morgan is pretty great. I’m surprised she’s not here! It seems like the kind of thing she’d love.”
“They’re coming tomorrow, I think. Don’t be surprised if Pepper calls later to invite Charlie,” Steve said with a smile, dabbing orange paint onto a clean brush. “You ready?”
“Mhmm. Make me pretty, Mr. Rogers.”
“You manage that on your own. I’m just adding a pretty tiger,” he said quietly, fighting down a blush when you glanced at him with surprise. 
He cleared his throat. 
“Try not to move,” he said, hoping the cold paint would distract you as he began.
“Not moving. One of my favorite activities,” you said with a flicker of a smile. 
“For a not-mover, I hear you did pretty great in the corn maze.”
“Oh, that was all Charlie. If it was just me, I’d still be lost in there somewhere. Probably crying.”
Steve laughed.
“I’m sure someone would have saved you eventually.”
“Don’t know about that. I don’t imagine anyone having much sympathy for an adult sobbing alone in a corn maze.”
“Well, fine, then I would’ve saved you,” Steve said, catching an errant wind-blown strand of your hair before it could land in the wet paint. He tucked it gently behind your ear. 
Sitting this close to you, he heard your breath catch slightly, saw your blink land a little harder than normal.
“Sorry,” he said softly. “Didn’t want you to get paint in your hair.”
“Already saving me,” you said with a quiet little laugh. “You have a habit of doing that.” 
“You give me too much credit.”
“I don’t think I do. Saving someone doesn’t have to be some huge gesture. It can be something like… Cheering me up at an open house. Looking out for Charlie and making her smile every day. Giving someone grumpy a sticker. Being a friend,” you ventured, giving a delicate shrug so as not to move too much. 
Steve’s heart gave a little flutter, gave him permission to brush your hair back from your face again, though none of it was in danger of dragging through paint this time. 
“I like being your friend.”
“I like it too,” you said quietly.
Steve took a breath, less steady than he would have preferred, as he added one final dab of paint.
“Ready to see?”
“Absolutely.”
You called Charlie back to your side as Steve held up the mirror for you. You beamed at your reflection.
“Love it!”
“Good.”
The three of you exchanged a few more pleasantries before you and Charlie headed off into the crowds again. Bucky wasted no time. They were barely out of earshot when he dropped into the stool in front of Steve with an expectant grin.
“Go away,” Steve sighed. “Unless you want me to paint your face.”
“Oh, sure. Paint little hearts all over it. Then it’ll match yours,” he said smugly.
“Stop.”
“I like being your friend,” Bucky quoted in a dramatic voice. “Do you know how many times you’ve said that to me? None. None times. We’ve been friends since we were five, Steve.”
“Yeah, because I don’t like being your friend. You’re annoying.”
“She’s pretty. She’s nice. She’s fun. She’s not wearing a ring, and she didn’t mention anything about a partner. Her daughter is the chillest kid I’ve ever been around. What’s the problem?”
“There’s no problem, Bucky.”
“Then why are you not attached at the lips? Does she have the plague? Do you have the plague?”
“She has a daughter. She doesn’t date.”
That, at least, finally shut Bucky up. He narrowed his eyes, thinking for a moment.
“Did she tell you that?”
“Tony told me that. Not that I asked.”
“And Tony heard it from…?”
“Pepper.”
“Who heard it from…?”
Steve gestured in the direction you’d walked.
“Hmm…”
“She doesn’t feel comfortable bringing men around Charlie.”
“She brings you around Charlie.”
“I’m her art teacher. It’s not the same.” 
Bucky tapped restlessly at the table for another moment.
“I’m gonna think about this and get back to you.”
“Oh, please do,” Steve said sarcastically.
“Hey,” Bucky nudged him until he made eye contact, his expression much more serious now. “I mean it. You really like her, don’t you?”
“...Yeah,” Steve said with a helpless shrug. “So I’m happy to be her friend.”
“You really like her,” Bucky repeated firmly. “So we’ll figure it out. Because I’m pretty sure she likes you too.”
“Thanks Buck.”
“Yeah, yeah,” he sighed, pushing up from the stool and knocking Steve’s shoulder with a light punch. “There’s a reason you keep me around, you know. Now stop frowning. You’re scaring the children.” 
Things returned to business as usual for about an hour. Steve painted a dozen more faces, had just finished a matching set of bumblebees on a tiny redhead and her grandmother when Bucky came jogging over again.
“Go, go, go!” he said urgently, shoving Steve out of his seat.
“What, why? Go where?” Steve asked, barely catching himself before he could hit the ground.
Bucky didn’t answer, grabbing the top of Steve’s head to steer his eyes in the right direction.
You and Charlie were laboring towards the parking lot, Charlie weighed down with a basket, tote bag, and your purse while you were nearly doubled over, rolling an enormous pumpkin across the patchy grass.
“Absolutely not,” he said quietly to himself, dodging around the edge of his table and running your direction.
“Whatcha got there?” he laughed, easily catching up to the two of you.
“The great pumpkin!” Charlie chimed in as you gave another shove to your regretfully chosen and mightily overgrown gourd.
“Are you sure? It’s not even sparkly,” Steve said, squinting speculatively.
“She’s sure,” you said, straightening up for a moment and swiping your hands on your jeans. “So we are escorting him to the car the best way we can. Him?” you asked, glancing at your daughter.
“Him.”
“Him,” you repeated, gesturing matter-of-factly at the pumpkin. 
“Got it. And would your giant orange gentleman like another escort to ease his journey?”
You made a face like you didn’t know whether to laugh or cry and settled for flinging your arms around him in a loose hug. 
“God, please. I will give you all the money in my wallet. I’ll give you my credit card. Would you like my social security number?”
Steve laughed, gently returning your hug for a brief moment before turning to face the pumpkin.
“Alright, pal. Let’s get you where you need to be.”
He squatted low to get his arms under it, straightened up with a low grunt as he hefted it up, leaning back slightly to take some of the weight on his chest. It wasn’t too heavy for him to manage, but the size and shape made it awkward to hold. Once he had it reasonably secure, he looked to you for direction, finding both you and Charlie staring at him with eyes as wide as you could make them. 
“Tell me where I’m going. I can’t see too well over this guy.”
You snapped into action then, taking your purse and basket from Charlie.
“Charlie, steer,” you said, pointing at Steve. “I’ll run and pull the car around.”
Charlie took up her station beside Steve, her hand on his elbow. You took off towards the parking lot, digging in your purse as you ran. 
“What are you going to name him?” Steve asked as Charlie gently steered him around clusters of oblivious people standing between him and the festival entrance. 
“I don’t know yet,” she said thoughtfully. “I didn’t think mom would say yes.”
“Let me know when you decide! I’m sure you’ll think of a great one.” 
“Are you okay? Is it too heavy?” she checked anxiously. 
“I’m alright,” he said with a laugh. 
You only kept them waiting for a minute before pulling up to the front entrance, popping the trunk before running over to them. 
“Thank you, thank you, thank you,” you said breathlessly, placing your hands on the pumpkin to help stabilize as Steve lowered it into the trunk of your car. 
“No problem,” he said, brushing his hands clean on his jeans, sighing when he noticed the drips of paint he’d managed to get on them. 
“Thank you, Mr. Steve,” Charlie said, hesitating for a moment before giving him a quick hug and fleeing to the back seat. 
Your eyes were soft as you stared after her, mouth curled into an amused smile.
“She’s never hugged me before,” Steve said quietly, feeling kind of like his heart might explode.
“Sweet girl. Did she call you Mr. Steve?” you asked with a laugh.
“Yeah, I told her she could just call me Steve outside of class. That’s the closest she’s gotten.”
“So cute,” you said with a sigh, shaking your head as if to clear it. “Anyway, thank you so much for your help. And for the face paint.”
“You’re very welcome.”
“It was nice seeing you,” you said warmly, squeezing his arm in goodbye as you took a step back toward the car. “Outside of school, I mean.”
“Nice seeing you too. Enjoy the rest of your weekend. And hey, if you decide to come back tomorrow with the Starks, come say hi before you leave.”
“I’ll let you know.”
You waved before settling back into the driver’s seat, and Steve backed towards the festival entrance, only turning to head back to the face paint table when you had driven away. 
At the last second, he swerved towards the jewelry booth, in search of shiny green rocks and little gold leaves.
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A slice of fall in June. Hope you enjoyed it! Would love, love, love to hear what you think of this little development!
As always, reblogs, replies, and asks make my world go round. Can’t do what I do without you!
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trattengo-ilfiato · 11 months
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I’m baaaaaaack
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discokicks · 5 months
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THE KIDS AIN'T FINE, FINE - ROY KENT.
PART THREE of ACES AT THE WATER'S EDGE.
(series masterlist!) (AO3!) (series playlist!)
pairing: roy kent x fem!reader (no use of y/n!)
summary: in 2012, roy’s summer olympic training camp is going (surprisingly) well. the same can’t be said for your new and current arrangement at richmond. and while you two think you’re doing a good job at keeping your bickering discreet, certain people are starting to notice that something’s up. and some are handling it better than others.
word count & rating: 11.8k (holy shit), R (typical roy kent fruity language)
chapter warnings: swearing, minor allusions to sexual assault and harassment, a sprinkling of sexual tension (we'll get there y'all), talk of alcohol and alcohol use, ploooot, lots of football/soccer/coaching talk, major angst, typical bickering, slight fluff.
author's note: i’m baaaaaaack and we're in it now, folks! we're covering A LOT of ground in this part. whole lotta relationship building and exposition. we're getting to the fun stuff soon, promise. and for the sake of my plot/pacing, we're pretending there was a week of time between last chapter and this one, despite them both taking place within the 3x02 timeframe. thank you for the love on the last chapter, i'm truly having so much fun writing this, so it's so exciting to see that people are enjoying it. ok, shutting up now, love u all tons, let's goooo! - mags
PRESENT DAY. (MID-AUGUST, 2023)
There are two days until Richmond’s first game of the season and you think you’ve slept approximately four and a half hours this entire week.
Despite the fact that your days weren’t too intense (pre-season practices were typically a little more involved and could stretch longer, and your Coaches' meetings never kept you past an unreasonable hour), your nights were rather rough. They seemed to be endless while also never offering quite enough time.
This was all self-inflicted, though. From the second you returned home from Nelson Road, you dove back into work, studying game film and your new players, attempting to figure out exactly what made this team tick. You thought about potential plays and formations in the shower, nearly slipping and cracking your head open each time you raced out to draw something up. You rehearsed things you wanted to say during practices, making sure each line was insightful and understandable, without overstepping any sort of boundaries.
Boundaries were key, here. You were hyper-aware of those now.
However, it wasn’t like you were saying the majority of these things. For the first time in almost a decade, you’d found yourself biting your tongue more often than not. You were friendly and encouraging like any good coach was, but you were agreeable. Quiet. Hesitant.
Those were issues and you knew that. That’s not what a coach was supposed to be, especially the coach of an AFC team. But that stupid fucking anxiety that you couldn’t shake had muzzled you. The fear made you weak. And while you hated it, you couldn’t rid yourself of it. That only made you feel more pathetic. 
And it wasn’t like the Richmond team hadn’t done everything in their power to make you feel welcome. The ‘primary school-level art’ Roy had spoken of on your first day had been a large ‘Welcome to Richmond’ banner held by the team in the locker room, each of the players greeting you with a wide smile on their faces. While, yes, it did look like it’d been put together by a couple of third-graders (with the exception of a wildly intricate sunflower in the corner done by Dani Rojas), the thought behind it nearly made you cry. 
All of the players had personally introduced themselves to you throughout the week, some keeping it short and sweet like Jaan Maas, others, such as Sam, approaching with lists of questions; not just about your professional life, but personal life, too.
They each were respectful and kind, listening to the few things you did work up the courage to say and seemed to take them to heart. They listened to you. They wanted to hear from you. They wanted to get to know you.
And you couldn’t fucking allow yourself to do it.
Your distant and rather closed-off behavior hadn’t gone unnoticed. While you thought you were keeping it cool and polite, certain players and people (AKA your entire coaching staff and boss) couldn’t help but see through what you’re doing. 
This becomes evident early one morning, approximately five days after you begin. You’re the first one at the Richmond facilities, having stayed up for so long that night that you figured you might as well just stay awake for training. You’re only the slightest bit delirious and are trying not to vibrate due to the three cups of coffee that are currently coursing through your system.
You’re about to take a sip of your fourth when you hear a knock on your office door. The sound makes you pause— nobody’s supposed to be here until eight, at least. 
The voice behind the knock reveals the identity immediately. “You’re here early, Coach.”
Unconsciously, your body goes rigid. You thought you’d be alone. You’ve only been here for a couple days, but nobody seemed to come in this early. Especially not Jamie Tartt.
What was he doing here? Why was he here so early? Was it just him? Or were there others with him? Anxiety floods through your veins at the idea of being alone in your office with this team’s star player. It creeps along your spine and into your mind and taunts you with ‘what ifs’, It’s stupid and it makes no sense and you hate yourself for it, but you can’t find a way to stop it. 
And it’s not even his fault. It has nothing to do with him. But you can’t seem to convince yourself of that.
Without turning around, you greet him. “C-Could say the same for you, Jamie.”
Jamie Tartt chuckles from your doorframe. “Having trouble sleepin’ lately,” he tells you, sounding slightly confused by your refusal to face him. “Thought I’d show up early.”
You force yourself to turn, crossing your arms over your chest. You ignore how clammy your palms are as your hands ball to fists. “Is that… typical for you?” you ask. “To show up at this time?”
“Not at all,” he replies with a shake of his head. The smile on his face is easy. Polite. Comfortable. “Just got a lot on me mind lately. Makes me sleep shitty.”
“Sorry to hear that.” You attempt the same politeness but your words come out clipped. You can’t tell if he notices. 
Jamie nods. “Oh, it’s whatever. I’ll get over it.”
The dead air you’re met with is almost painful. You know you should be better at this. You know you should be engaging in this type of small talk, trying to get to know your team. You’re their coach, for fuck’s sake. You know what you need to do.
But as you stare at Jamie, you can’t get anything to come out. You don’t want to say the wrong thing. You don’t want to overstep your boundaries or his. You don’t want to screw this up too. One wrong move and it could be over for you.
The hesitation clearly reads on your face and this time, you can tell Jamie notices. However, what you notice is the way he lingers at your door.
Finally, you muster up the courage to ask, “Is there something I can help you with?”
That seems to be what he was looking for. His shoulders sag as he nods, glancing behind him to see if there’s anyone around. “I was just…” He enters your office, plopping himself down into Roy’s desk chair with a lazy spin, and the action makes your throat tighten. “Is, uh… Is Zava really coming to Richmond?”
You don’t know what you were expecting from him, but it certainly wasn’t that. The question catches you off guard. “Oh,” you say. You shrug, arms uncrossing. “Uh, I mean… it’s being talked about. I’m still kind of new, but it seems like every team’s kinda trying to get him. I know West Ham was trying hard for sure, so… not sure if we’ll win him over.”
Jamie nods. “But it’s on the table?”
His tone doesn’t match the question. Everyone else— each player, coach, fan, everyone has the same type of excitement when talking about the prospect of Zava. And you get it. 
But Jamie doesn’t seem to be in the same boat. And immediately, you get that too.
The realization makes you part your lips, something like sympathy rising up inside you. Jamie’s the star. The Ace. He’s Richmond’s playmaker and he thinks he’s going to be sidelined because of it. And honestly, he may just be right.
“Yeah,” you reply. “It’s still on the table.” He nods once more, like he’s confirming a reality he didn’t want to face. In an attempt to reassure him, you awkwardly try, “But there’s still a lot of ‘what-ifs’ that have to happen before that does. The probability of it happening is like, super low.” Jamie looks at you. “So, I wouldn’t worry about it until it does.”
That makes Jamie shake his head. “I’m not worried about it,” he nearly scoffs. You can’t help the way you look at him, eyebrows raised and calling him out on his bullshit. “I’m not!”
“Good,” you say, backing off from this type of conversation before it can start. The idea of getting into any type of argument makes you tense. “You don’t have to be.”
That seems to satisfy him. Momentarily. Because then he asks, “But if he does…” As he trails off, he meets your expectant eyes. “Could we… Could you help me out?”
The question gives you pause. “In what way? Giving you updates on where we are with Zava?”
“No,” he chuckles. “I mean, like… training me. One on one? Or even just giving me more notes in practice?”
The second he says training, your entire body freezes. He wanted to do one-on-one training sessions with you? Just the two of you? Alone? The last time someone you’d coached had asked you that…
Jamie’s expression contorts in confusion as he sees the look on your face. “I just thought that, like, we played the same position? And y’know, I’ve seen your film and I know what you do and… I think you’d be able to help me.”
You try to answer him but the words don’t come out. Your throat’s dry, jaw tight. However, luckily, before Jamie has time to fully panic about his questions, you crush them. “Uh, I’m—” Your voice cracks. “I’m not sure I’d be comfortable with that just yet.”
Your answer seems to surprise him, but you’re surprised by how quickly he backs off. He physically takes a step back, throwing his hands up. “Oh, yeah. Of course,” he says. “You just got here. Don’t really know us yet. Totally get it.”
You hadn’t expected that. The last time, you’d been fought. Begged. Coerced. You’re the only one who seems to get me, Coach. You just know how to teach me. C’mon.
But Jamie doesn’t do that. And you’re not sure what to do with that.
“I-I’m sorry,” you manage to get out. “Nothing against you, but I’m just—” You interrupt yourself with a new offer. “Maybe ask Roy?”
That Jamie actually scoffs at. “Right.”
“I’m serious,” you tell him. “He’s actually a pretty good trainer.”
“No, he’s uh…” Jamie swipes at his mouth as he laughs. “He’s not my biggest fan.”
His admission makes you laugh and relax for a moment. “Well, at least we’ve got that in common, Tartt.”
Jamie’s gaze snaps to yours at that, but his oncoming question is interrupted by a voice from the hallway. “The fuck are you two doing here so early?”
Speak of the devil and he shall appear. Roy’s voice is a welcome one for the first time in eight years. Your eyes flash to him as he stands outside your shared office, glancing between the two of you in confusion. 
“We both had trouble sleeping,” you respond. “Felt like being early for once.”
Jamie nods in agreement. “Was shootin’ a bit outside. Saw the light was on and wanted to say hi to Coach.”
Roy nods but says nothing to that. He just continues to stare at Jamie in that vaguely intimidating, wildly annoying way. Jamie’s brows raise before Roy says, “You’re in my fucking chair.”
Jamie rolls his eyes. “Yeah. Because you weren’t here. I was gonna get out when you got in.”
“Well, I’m in now,” Roy says. “So get out of my fucking chair.”
Jamie glances at you with a cheeky smile. “Grandad doesn’t like people in his chair.”
The corners of your lips twitch up. “Grandad doesn’t like a lot of things,” you reply, a strange sense of pride rising within you as Jamie’s grin widens.
“Grandad’s about to go out back out into the car park and drive through the facility if my chair’s not empty in three fucking seconds,” Roy grits.
You bite back a smile at the empty threat, watching as Jamie shakes his head and stands. “Easy there, geezer. I’m out. Going back to the pitch,” he tells you two, making his way out of the office. Before he leaves, he glances back at you. “And Coach? Don’t worry about what I said.”
You can feel Roy’s eyes on the side of your face as you give Jamie a small, grateful smile. But when he exits, it drops and you fail to hold back a heavy, shaky sigh. God, why the fuck can’t you do your fucking job? Why does this have to be so hard?
Less than a second of silence passes between you and Roy before he asks, “What did he say?”
You shake your head. “Nothing. Nothing important.”
Roy doesn’t take the hint. He’s never been good at that. “What did he say?” he repeats.
“He—” You slump into your desk chair, running a hand down your face. You know avoiding this is no use. He’ll ask until he gets it out of you, so you might as well get it over with. “He asked me for extra training.”
Roy’s brows shoot up. “You?”
You glare at him from behind your fingers. “I’m a fantastic coach.”
“I know you are. But there’s no way he could have known.”
Your glare only gets more intense as you drop your hands. The implication of his statement isn’t lost on you. No one knows anything about you because of how little you’ve spoken. You get that. But he doesn’t need to be a dick about it.
“It doesn’t matter,” you say with a roll of your eyes. “I said no, so.”
“You said no?” He sounds incredulous. “Since when do you say no?”
“Since—” The words get caught in your throat again, and it tightens horribly. Since West Ham. Since you said no more times than you could count and it went ignored.
You shake your head like it’ll clear your thoughts. “I’m just not comfortable with it.”
Roy’s suspicious. In your experience, a suspicious Roy Kent is just about as bad as a deceitful Roy Kent. Every fucking move you make for the next week will be under scrutiny until he can pinpoint whatever he thinks is happening. The idea makes you want to take him up on his offer to drive through the facility.
His eyes stay on you, calculating stare never breaking. “Why?” he asks, as if he’s expecting a simple answer.
But it’s not simple. It’s so unbelievably, wildly, completely the opposite of simple. 
But you give him a simple answer in return. It’s a bullshit answer, but it’s simple. “Boundaries,” you say. You’re out of your chair before he can respond to that. “I’m going to get more coffee.”
He says nothing as you exit, but you can feel his eyes on you. 
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LONDON OLYMPICS. (LATE JULY, 2012)
As it turns out, Roy Kent’s Olympic Boot Camp is wildly more effective and insanely more fun than you thought it ever could be.
The two of you had met up twice since the night of the Opening Ceremony, at the same field, typically at the late-night same time. Roy had continued to send Roger the Driver for you, something you’d taken gladly advantage of, especially with your limited knowledge of the London area. You’d actually grown to love Roger despite his rather talkative nature, and he’d clearly taken a liking to you. 
(“Be kind to this one, Roy!” he’d yelled from the window as you’d exited his car. “The States need her much more than England needs you!”
“Fuck off, you old twat!”)
However, while these trainings had been way better than you’d expected, it’s also way fucking harder than you anticipated. 
You knew Roy was good. He was an AFC star. A Chelsea legend in the making. He was as well known as he was for a reason, and it wasn’t just because he frequented a tabloid cover. Roy was good.
But you think you may have underestimated just how good he was.
And it wasn’t like you weren’t keeping up with him. You could go shot for shot with him, run the same length and duration, and score on him with the same type of precision. Of course, he had his things that he was better at than you were (as a midfielder, he was a smart, fucking brick wall of a defender and wasn’t afraid to push you around) and you had your strengths over him (you were quicker than he was and your striker nature made you better at anticipating him). But there were certain things he’d do in the midst of a 1v1 drill that you would have never thought of, or he’d stop a play to give you a direction that had never occurred to you.
(Or, it would have occurred to you, but just not as quickly.)
That, coupled with the fact that he liked to run these practices until your lungs gave out, made for an intensely more challenging but rewarding experience.
But you didn’t think of them as rewarding until they were over. Case in point, your current and third meeting with him. It was 1:30 in the morning at Mabley Green on the 2nd of August and here you were, growing more and more frustrated with the fact that you couldn’t get around Roy despite the aggressive amount of fakes and footwork you were throwing around. He’d been in your ear the entire time, somehow encouraging you while still being a shit, and when you thought you had him, he stuck out a leg to stop the ball, effectively tripping you in the process.
You hit the ground with an ‘oof,’ taking advantage of your new horizontal position to lie for a minute and catch your breath. Your chest heaved up and down and you stared up at the huge lights illuminating the field. You could hear Roy walking toward you as you threw your arm over your eyes in exhaustion.
“You’re a dick,” you told him. “That fucking hurt.”
Roy’s scoff was loud. “That was a fucking dive.”
“You tripped me!”
“Bit dramatic.”
An affronted sound left your lips and you put your other hand up in a way that resembled a phone. “I’ve got the kettle on the line right now if you’d like to tell it it’s black.” 
You were surprised to hear him chuckle at this. “No idea what you’re talking about.”
Your eyes roll from behind your arm. “I’m serious,” you say. “All you boys act like you were shot the second someone marks you. It’s pathetic.”
“Refs miss shit. You gotta put on a show.”
“Is that show The O.C? Because I’m always expecting an auto-tuned ‘mmm, whatcha say’ to sound off each time one of you losers hits the ground.”
Roy’s standing above you now, looking down with a half-amused expression. “I don’t know what the fuck that means.” He’s talking again before you can explain. “Get up. We’re not finished yet.”
A loud, ugly groan escapes you. You still haven’t completely caught your breath. “I think I’m dying.”
“You’re fine. Get up.”
“I’m serious,” you say again. You finally remove your arm from over your eyes, squinting up at him. He’s as unamused as ever. “I think I’m dying and you killed me. I think if you tried to get me up right now, I’d collapse and stroke out or something.”
“And it would be a fucking loss for us all,” he replies dryly, earning a scowl from you. “I’ve got you for another thirty. We’re wasting time.”
You release another groan and squeeze your eyes shut once more. “Can I please just have, like, five minutes?” you plead. “Not all of us have this military-regimented training style that you seem to. I haven’t been this dialed in since college. Still trying to adjust here.”
(You’ve also never trained like this with someone as good as him before, but you keep that one to yourself. He doesn’t need the ego boost.)
You don’t hear anything in response for a moment. Confused, you open your eyes, expecting to find him still staring down at you with a frown, but he’s not there. Before you can rise to find him, a plastic water bottle lands right next to your head. You flinch in surprise, shooting up to glare at him.
Roy sits down across from you before you can complain. “Five minutes,” he agrees. 
“Oh, thank God,” you mutter, opening up your water to take a long gulp. You glance at him. “Are all of your Boot Camps as intense as this?”
Roy rolls his eyes at your question. “I’m sure you’ve been to worse.”
“I have. But in like, high school. This shit’s got nothing on my two-week sleep-away soccer camp in Western Massachusetts.” You pause for a moment. “Or the one in North Carolina. That one sucked.”
He looks over at you. “Yeah?”
“Oh, yeah. Six A.M. early training sessions into all-day drills and tournament game play? Followed by a lovely nine P.M. late-night training?” You shake your head. “Insane. And that early and late-night stuff? Totally optional.”
“But you still chose to do it,” he states, brows raised.
“I still chose to do it,” you repeat. “That, and my psycho coach would keep tabs on me to make sure I was going.” You chuckle despite yourself and shrug. “But I did it. Without complaint.”
“I see you picked up the complaining later in life.”
You make a face at the way he smirks. “I’d be a masochist if I didn’t complain about this,” you tell him, biting back a smile. “I assume you were born with that trait?”
“Just fucking about,” he mutters. At your inquisitive look, he shrugs. “Sunderland scouted me when I was nine. Training was pretty fucking rough until I went into the AFC.”
“I forgot you guys could start that stuff that young over here,” you say, taking another sip of your water. “Was that tough?”
“I kept up,” he answers. “They were hard on us but—”
“No,” you interrupt. “I meant like, doing that shit at nine. Being away from your family. Being on your own that young. Was that hard?”
With every reason you listed, you could see him stiffening. His expression became harder and you figured if he could push a button to put a wall between you two, he would. Your stomach sank as you tried to figure out if you’d said the wrong thing or pushed too far. Maybe that was a boundary he wasn’t willing to cross. Despite the amount you’d spoken these past three sessions, maybe you weren’t yet friendly enough to ask about his upbringing. 
But then again, he barely talked about himself in any capacity, so maybe it wasn’t just that. Maybe it was everything.
He was quiet for a moment before he shook his head. “No,” he finally said, though the one word alone let you know the answer was the opposite. He glanced down at his watch. “Five minutes are up.”
And that conversation is over. Got it. No questions about his childhood. Understood.
Still, the dismissal catches you slightly off guard. “O-Oh,” you stammer. “Right. Okay.”
Roy said nothing else as he stood, making his way back to the end of the pitch. You suppose you should have expected that from someone like him. While he’d gotten better as a conversationalist as the days had passed, you still led the majority of the talking. And you were fine with that. You were a pretty open book yourself and often forgot that most people weren’t the same way. Maybe that was on you.
You sit for a moment, allowing him some distance before you stand. You throw your water bottle to the sideline and follow behind him, feeling a bit like a dog that just got scolded. But you quickly shake that feeling away as he stops where he left the ball and turns to you, kicking it in your direction.
You put your foot on it as you receive it and look at him expectantly. “I’m setting a timer for thirty seconds,” he tells you, starting to fiddle with his watch. “We’re staying in the box. If you don’t score on me within that time, you run a lap.”
Well, that just sounds like your own personal hell. You frown. “And if I do score?”
“You won’t,” Roy replies quickly, and you don’t know if you’ve ever heard him sound more sure.
“No, but when I do score?” you repeat, emphasizing the word to see him roll his eyes. “What happens? We subtract a lap?”
Roy shrugs. “Sure. But—”
“No,” you say, eyes lighting up. “You have to run.”
“I’m not the one being trained here.”
“Yeah, but I’ve got a match tomorrow. And if my legs like, give out on the field I’m totally blaming you.” You roll the ball against your cleat. “‘I’m sure that ‘Roy Kent being the reason America loses’ isn’t exactly the headline your PR team’s gonna want.”
“I don’t give a fuck about PR,” he replies.
Images of rather negative tabloid covers and online gossip articles starring the man before you start flashing through your head. “Clearly.”
“I just don’t want anyone knowing I’m fraternizing with a fucking Yank,” he finishes, a smirk tugging at his lips. 
An overly fake and affronted gasp leaves your lips. “Fraternizing?” you parrot. “Is that what we’re doing?”
“Guess not,” he says. The smug expression intensifies. “Suppose I could tell them we’re training. Because the girl who’s supposed to be America’s fucking Ace needs it.”
That sparks a fire in you that you haven’t felt in a while. You can’t remember the last time someone challenged you like this. Sure, the women you played against would talk a fair amount of shit to you on and off the field, especially during a tight game when tensions were running high. But this was different. It was different hearing it from someone like him.
You’d never liked having to prove yourself. You knew it came with the territory of your chosen career path. You’d been doing it all your life. For every team you joined, every game you played, and every interview you gave, you’d been given an opportunity to prove yourself. And each time, you did. You were good at showing people up. But that didn’t mean you liked it.
You figured at some point people would just get the message. But unfortunately, that had never been the case.
So, as you look at Roy (who, by this point, knew he’d hit a nerve and had gotten the exact response he’d wanted), you know exactly what you’re going to do. You’re going to prove yourself and show him up like the rest.
With that settled, you nod at him. “Start the clock,” you say.
And as soon as he does, you’re on.
You attack without caution this time around. You’d never held back when practicing with Roy (mainly because he’d reprimand you if he felt you weren’t trying hard enough), but you also rarely had an edge to you like this. It’s new and aggressive and just a bit exciting.
Roy’s fucking ecstatic to see it. His chest meets your back as you attempt to pass him and you can feel him chuckling against it. “That’s it,” he says lowly. “Get around me. I fucking dare you.”
“Shut up,” you mutter, attempting a fake before moving to go the other way.
Said attempt ends up being less than successful as Roy fails to fall for it and kicks the ball out from beneath your foot. You swear under your breath, watching as it sails out of the box.
You’re close enough to him to still feel his chest moving up and down against your back, and his breath tickles your neck when he asks, “Is that seriously the best you’ve got?”
Your jaw clenches, but you refuse to look at him. “I’m gonna fucking destroy you.”
The certainty in your voice makes Roy grin, something you don’t see as you jog to retrieve the ball. The remnants of the smile stick around as you whip around to face him, commanding that he start the clock once more. The moment he does as he’s told, you’re coming at him again, nothing but determination to be seen in your expression.
This time, you’re quick. You anticipate his classic defensive stance, knowing that he’ll block your first shot. As soon as the ball bounces off his foot, you’re there for the rebound. You stop short, pulling back the moment he makes yet another move to take it from you, and he slips. 
You easily score on him not a second later.
After watching the ball fly into the net, you glance over at Roy. While he doesn’t look thrilled to have been bested, he doesn’t look sad either. Again, it’s like there are remnants of a smile left to be seen. 
“So,” you say. “Are we at zeroes for laps? Or one for one?”
Roy shakes his head. “One for one. Let’s keep fucking going.”
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PRESENT DAY. (MID AUGUST, 2023)
It isn’t until the end of practice that you can feel it. How much Roy wants to fight with you.
It sounds stupid to phrase it like that, but it’s the only way. He’s pent up, a week into your ‘no fighting’ deal, and ready to burst. And while it’s worked (only because you two strictly talk about work and nothing else), now that he’s got something more personal to say, it’s like you’re waiting for an active volcano.
To be fair, your deal has worked in terms of not making a scene and not raising most people’s suspicions. But every other level, it’s been torturous. And right now? Roy’s ready to kill you.
He can’t, for the life of him, understand why you’re acting like this. 
He knows you. You’re warm. You’re friendly. You have this innate ability to make everyone around you comfortable in your presence, an ability to talk to anyone and everyone and actually get through. All of these things, coupled with the fact that he could never shut you up, made you who you were; a great teammate and an even better coach. 
(They were also all qualities Roy wished he had himself, which is why he was so fucking drawn to you in the first place, but that’s neither here nor there.)
He doesn’t know who this is. But he knows for a fact that these changes aren’t just because of time.
Roy’s breaking point, however, occurs toward the end of your Thursday practice. It’d been a good day, the boys showing more promise than ever. End-of-pre-season jitters (as Ted called them) were in full force and it was clear that the team couldn’t be more excited to get started with the season.
In your return back into the facility, Sam Obisanya trails back to fall into step with you with a wide smile on his face. He doesn’t miss the look of surprise you give him as he says, “I really liked what you said about passing around the box. I’ve been thinking that for all of pre-season, but did not know how to get it through to everyone.”
The point he’s referring to was one of the only things you’d said all afternoon. It was a quiet direction on your part, told more as a recommendation than an instruction. But Sam, Jamie, Colin, and Dani had taken it in stride, and it worked. Cleanly, too. You straight-up almost cried out of relief.
“Oh,” you say to him lamely, offering a small smile. “Thank you. You guys did great with it.”
Sam’s grin gets wider. “We all are going to eat after we’re done here,” he tells you. “You should join us.”
You can feel your stomach drop at the offer. You don’t want to turn him down. Poor Sam was trying so hard to make an effort with you and you feel completely awful giving him nothing in return. 
But you just… can’t. Boundaries. Boundaries.
Sam gets his answer from the way your smile turns apologetic. “I wish I could,” you say, knowing that it’s the truth. “But, I, uh— I’ve actually got plans tonight.”
“You could just come for a drink?” he offers. “I’m only going for a little while myself. I have some things at the restaurant I need to do.”
Your heart clenches. “I really wish I could.”
Thankfully, Sam takes the hint. He nods at you, still smiling. You don’t think he’s ever stopped. “That’s alright,” he says. “Another time.”
You nod back. “Yeah. Another time.”
With that, Sam goes to catch up with his teammates and leaves you with an overwhelming amount of guilt on your shoulders. 
He’s trying, you tell yourself. They all are. It’s different than West Ham. They’re not the same. Nobody on this team is like him—
You can feel yourself getting nauseous at the mere thought of him. It completely takes you out of the moment and your hands begin to shake back and forth as you attempt to continue walking, clenching your teeth as if that’ll rid your mind of him.
How strange it is to be haunted by someone who’s still living.
You’re already disoriented enough when you feel a hand grab your arm and yank you to the side. Your world spins for a moment and when it stabilizes, you realize you’re in the Boot Room staring at Roy Kent.
He slams the door shut and whirls around on you. “What the fuck are you doing?”
You do a full, cartoon-like double-blink at him. “What am I doing?” you ask him incredulously. “What are you doing? Why the hell did you pull me in here like that?”
“You don’t have plans tonight,” is what he replies with, like that’s a reasonable answer to your question.
“And how would you know that?” you question. 
He gives you a look. “Because you fucking don’t.”
“I do,” you say, crossing your arms. Your mind scrambles to find some excuse that’s suitable. For whatever reason, you decide on, “I have a date.”
Roy’s brows rocket up. “Do you?”
You know he can see right through you, so you don’t even bother trying. “No,” you admit, watching him roll his eyes. “But I could have. You don’t know my schedule.”
Roy doesn’t seem to want to linger on this. “That’s the third fucking time one of them has invited you out since you got here,” he tells you, ignoring the way your eyes widen. “Why do you keep turning them down?”
“Why are you keeping track of that?” you shoot back.
“Because you’re being a fucking hermit.” As if he knows exactly what you’re going to say next, he holds out a hand. “And that’s my fucking job. That’s not who you are.”
His words make you deflate, and your arms get tighter over your chest. “I’m not being a hermit,” you mutter, looking away from him. “I’m just not trying to take work home with me. I don’t see anything wrong with keeping the two separate.”
Roy isn’t having it. “No, you’re not,” he says. “You’re not keeping the two separate. You’re shutting out every fucking person around you when you’re at work too.” 
“That’s not true—”
“Did you or did you not refuse to train Jamie yesterday morning?” he snaps. Your silence answers his question for him. “It is fucking true. And even if it weren’t, unfortunately, that whole keeping-work-separate fucking bullshit doesn’t work here. Trust me. I tried.”
You scoff. “Well, that sounds like an HR issue.”
“Well, when Ted stops leaving fucking flowers for the HR women every week, I’m sure they’ll start to take your complaints seriously,” he tells you, and you sigh. Heavy. “Now, what the fuck is wrong with you?”
This question earns him a glare. “There’s nothing wrong with me,” you bite. “And if there were, it surely wouldn’t concern you.”
“Yes, it fucking does. You know why?” he asks. You stare at him expectantly. “Because last week, I remember someone telling me that if this was going to work, we have to tell each other things.”
Your own words come back to bite you in the ass and it makes your chest tighten. You scoff in an attempt to play it off, but that panic starts rising inside of you and throws everything off course. You know that it’s stupid, and you know that it’s Roy, and that despite it all, deep down, nothing bad would come from telling him… it’s still scary.
You didn’t want to talk about it and he didn’t deserve to know. Not yet, at least.
“Not this,” you say after a beat. Your voice sounds meek and it makes Roy’s brow scrunch. “I’ll talk to you about anything else you want, but not…” You interrupt yourself with a breath. “Not this.” Then, you utter a word you haven't said in eight years. "Foxtrot."
It’s then that Roy’s expression turns from confused to shocked. His lips part in surprise, like he can’t believe that just left your mouth. And then he looks at you. Like, really looks at you. It almost intimidates you in a way, and it would intimidate you more if you didn’t know this look of his. Not only is he evaluating you, you can tell he’s holding something back.
You’d said the word. Pulled that thing out of the trenches and threw it in his face. But he's still staring at you, determined to figure out exactly how to approach this situation. Attempting to figure out if he should say something.
Because, unfortunately, as well as you know Roy, he knows you better. And he knows how to get through to you. 
(And it’s fucking irritating.)
He, in fact, does choose to say something. And it’s not what you’re expecting. Because before he says in, he reaches into his pocket for his wallet, filing through it. 
Your mouth parts in question. “Are you trying to bribe me into—”
“Shut up,” he mutters, and you do so until he seems to find what he’s looking for. He holds out a slip of paper-- something that appears to be a newspaper clipping from ages ago. “Here.”
You blink at it. “What is that?”
“Just fucking—” Roy sighs, adjusting his grip on the page. “Read it.”
Hesitantly, you reach out to grab it. Your fingers brush his when you take it, and the action alone makes the two of you glance at each other. You look away as you unfold the paper, quickly scanning it.
Newcomer Roy Kent is an over-hyped, so-called prodigy whose unbridled rage and mediocre talent rendered his Premier League debut a profound disappointment.
Your gaze shifts up at him knowingly. Roy can’t help but notice that most of the anger has slipped from your face. “Crimm?”
Roy nods once. “Crimm.”
“Was this your first game?” you ask, and when he nods again, things start to make a little more sense. You sigh, shoulders slumping. “You were seventeen.”
“I was seventeen,” he repeats, reaching out to take the clipping back from you. He only seems marginally surprised that you remembered that. “I was fucking seventeen years old and fucking debilitated by how nervous I was. I didn’t sleep for days before the game and then I went out there, I fucking survived it, and then read that shit. Didn’t sleep for days after it.” He shakes his head. “And then that prick fucking waltzes in here with his notepad and his stupid fucking hair like he didn’t fucking destroy me and wants to write a book about my team? Not a fucking chance.”
The outburst makes you stare at Roy in shock. He’d never mentioned anything like this to you. By the way he spoke of his earlier AFC days at Sunderland, you’d always assumed that it was smooth sailing. That while his career didn’t really take off until he joined Chelsea, he didn’t hold any resentment for anything that had happened. And while this may have seemed insignificant in the grand scheme of things, especially looking back at his career and other things people had said about him, this was Roy. Of course, he’d hold on to something like this.
“So, yeah,” he says, shifting uncomfortably under your gaze. “That’s why I won’t talk to Crimm. I don’t give a shit if you don’t get it, but that’s why.” He motions to you. “I showed you mine, so you show me yours, or whatever the fuck. That's how the counter-Foxtrot works, right?”
You do get it. You understand it better than anyone. But more importantly, you understand why he’d hold on to that. Roy, who could hold a grudge almost as well as you could. Roy, who hated the media and press and the world knowing shit about him more than anyone you knew. Roy, who felt and internalized things so deeply that he didn’t even realize he was doing it. 
It’s the first thing he’s clued you in on in years. Even if it was vague and minimal, he told you. And you know how much he didn’t want to. That’s good enough for you to allow yourself to clue him in too.
(God, he really does know how to get through, huh?)
You blink away from him, gaze focused on the door. “I just…” You clear your throat, throwing a hand up pathetically. “I don’t get why they want to get to know me so bad.”
“Because they’re good fucking lads,” he responds.
“I know. And it’s pissing me off,” you mutter. Your arms are still crossed and right now, that feels like the only thing that’s protecting you. The weight is comforting. “I know it sounds ungrateful and dumb and it doesn’t make sense, but I just wish they’d…”
“...Fuck off?”
“Yeah,” you huff. “That.”
Roy’s head tilts. “Why?”
You don’t want to tell him. You know how stupid he’ll think it is, you know you’ll get told you’re an idiot. But he’s already told you something. In your world of deals, that means something. And your words return again to taunt you.
If this is gonna work, you have to tell me things, okay?
Your eyes shut and a shaky breath escapes your lips. It all comes out at once, like you’re trying to exterminate them. “Because the last time I got to know the team, I got fired,” you tell him, and his entire demeanor shifts. “And I can’t do that again. That can’t happen again. So, if that means I have to be distant and a bit unfriendly, then so be it.”
The inquisitive look he wore vanished entirely, replaced with something harder and much more serious. “What do you mean?”
You can feel your skin start to crawl. Your shirt suddenly doesn’t feel right on your body. It’s too hot in this small Boot Room and it’s all suddenly too much. “N-Nothing,” you say, chest tightening. “It doesn’t matter. You asked for the reason, and I gave it to you. That’s why I’m being weird.”
Roy’s not buying it. He’s seen all your signs and he knows there’s more to this than you’re letting on. You can tell he’s battling whether or not to press forward, and if so, how to do so. Your eyes are pleading for him to drop it. 
“It wasn’t leadership differences,” he decides to land on. He says it like he’s always known. Like it may be confirming another suspicion. But it’s vague enough that you’re okay with it.
You chuckle, but there’s no humor in it. “No,” you say. “Not exactly.”
Roy nods, silence filling the room. He’s still staring at you and you’re starting to think he won’t ever stop. You notice the sliver of anger in his eyes but see it’s more subdued than usual. It’s not directed at you. It’s like he’s filing it away for later.
He speaks a moment later. “Whatever happened there,” he begins, voice low. “It won’t happen here. It would never happen here.”
You swallow the lump in your throat. “I’m starting to get that,” you answer honestly. “But it’s still hard.”
“I know.” Roy says, and the way he nods tells you that he does know. His mouth opens, wanting to say more, but it doesn’t come out immediately. “Just…” His eyes cast up to the ceiling. “If anything, just fucking… speak up in practice more. You’re their coach now. If you don’t want to get fucking personal with them, at least get to know them on the field.”
“I know them on the field,” you reply, because you do. You know your new players inside and out. You’ve studied them. You know their strengths, their weaknesses, what makes them tick. You know what works. “I do.”
“I know that,” is Roy’s immediate response, just like this morning. He points to the door. “But they fucking don’t. And they won’t know it until you fucking show them.”
This time, you look away from him because you know he’s right. A decade ago, Roy was just about fifty-fifty when it came to right and wrong, but now? He was consistently on target. You’re not sure which switch flipped in him or when, but goddamn, was it maddening.
You ask him such as you huff in annoyance. “Since when are you right all the fucking time?”
Roy’s clearly not expecting that, and it’s evident by the way he barks out a laugh. But, he figures, if you’re going to be nice, he supposes he will too. 
“You were gone,” he replies with a chuckle. “Figured I had to pick up the slack.”
Involuntarily, your eyes go soft at his words. They’re kind and truthful and genuinely civil. It’s only for a moment, but Roy picks up on it in an instant. It makes the tiny, less resentful piece of him want to make it happen again, but he tells that piece of him to shut the fuck up.
He watches you as you sigh, shutting your eyes as if you’re readjusting. “Okay,” you finally say. “I’ll be better. I’ll… actually do my job, I guess.”
“About fucking time,” Roy mutters, though it’s slightly encouraging.
“But,” you continue, “I can’t… I can’t train Jamie. I can’t do one-on-one. That’s my non-negotiable.”
Roy wants to ask why. He wants to understand. He knows he’d be shit at helping you through it, but he just wants to get it. However, the look on your face keeps him from saying what he wants to. So, instead, he simply nods. “Okay.”
The relief you feel is written across your face. “Okay,” you agree. Then, you add, “I, uh, did tell him to ask you, though.”
Roy’s expression goes blanker than usual. “You fucking what?”
“You’re a good one-on-one trainer,” you offer, voice going up an octave. “I’m, like, your top reference.”
“Yeah, but you’re you,” Roy responds. “I can work with you. Not Jamie Tartt.”
You shrug. “What’s the difference?”
“Jamie Tartt is a fucking prick,” he states, as if it’s obvious. “You’re infuriating. And annoying. And a fucking headache. But he’s all those things on top of being a fucking prick.”
Your lips part at this, squinting at Roy. “I’m sorry, and you wanted me to train him?”
Roy doesn’t acknowledge your comment. “I’m not fucking training him.”
“I’m not saying you have to,” you respond, raising your hands in surrender. “I’m just letting you know that I passed him off to you.”
“Appreciate it. I’ll tell him to fuck off.”
“Glad you have a game plan.” While those words were lilted with annoyance, your next are a bit softer. “He… seemed a bit worried about Zava.”
Roy’s brow draws slightly. “Zava?”
“He tried to play it off,” you explain, “but he wasn’t subtle. Jamie’s obviously used to being the best on the team. I’m not sure he’s loving the competition.”
“The twat will get over it,” Roy says. “Sometimes you’re the best on the field, sometimes you’re not. That’s fucking life.”
You shoot him a look. “I don’t think he shakes things off like that. He’s not like you and me where we either don’t care or immediately use that type of shit for motivation.” Your eyes cast up to the ceiling as you speak, spilling out every thought you’ve had since Jamie came to you. “Guys like him, they need that reassurance. That ego needs to be healed when it’s been shot down, and then they’re finally ready to get motivated…” You trail off as soon as you see the way Roy’s looking at you. Head-tilted and slightly satisfied. “What?”
“Nothing,” he replies with a shrug. There’s a ghost of a smile on his face. “It’s just nice to get to see you finally fucking coaching.”
Warmth rises up your neck. It’s a mixture of embarrassment, being called out, and something else. The feeling makes you itch and in an attempt to shake it off, you shrug. “Yeah, yeah. Whatever.” 
There’s a brief moment of silence and for a second, you think he’s going to make you sit in this air. However, he seems to take pity on you. “I’ll keep that in mind.”
It’s a soft agreement, one that you weren’t sure you were going to get. But it takes a bit of the weight off nonetheless. “Thank you.”
“He’s still a prick,” he adds, like he can’t help himself. 
You nod in faux assurance. “Sure, Grandad.”
Roy casts his eyes to the ceiling. “Fuck’s sake, not you too.”
You can’t help it. You laugh. For the first time in eight years, Roy sees you laugh. It’s quiet. Light, even. But it’s lovely. It’s sweet. Roy can’t believe he’d allowed himself to go so long without hearing it. 
Yet another silence passes between you two. Maybe it’s to savor the moment. Maybe it’s to remember. Perhaps it’s both. Perhaps it’s neither. 
Whatever it is, it suddenly feels way too comfortable. There’s a split second where you’re back in 2015, just before everything went to shit. And that can’t happen. You can’t allow that to happen.
However, before you can move past that, Roy just has to catch you off guard. “So, you’ll start fucking coaching and I’ll… consider training with him.” He says the words like they take effort. And then, he looks at you and completely throws you off. “Should we shake on it?”
The words are hesitant and you know why. You have to refrain from taking a step back from him simply because of the weight that they carry. All you can do is stare at his outstretched hand. If you didn’t know any better, you’d say his hands were shaking.
But, you snap yourself out of it, and when you meet him in the middle, you’re certain yours are.
He holds eye contact with you as you make the agreement, hands grasped around each others with the intention of a promise. It’s too real. Too familiar. Too… much.
So, before you can freak out in front of him, you cut it short with a nod and remove your hand from his. You glance out the window of the Boot Room door to see the team pass by, all packed up and ready for their outing. One you know you should be joining, but just aren’t there yet.
When you turn back to him, the small smile on your face is tight. But you’re truthful when you say, “Thank you.”
Roy doesn’t need to ask what for. He knows. Of course he does. 
But luckily for you, he seems to be on the same page, blinking at you like he’s pulling himself out of some self-induced trance. “Right.” He awkwardly returns your nod, avoiding eye contact as he heads for the door. “Don’t make me say any of that shit again.”
And, as soon as the door shuts behind him, you’re finally left with more answers than questions about your place at Richmond for the first time all week.
(The same can’t be said for your questions about Roy. But, you figure, what else is new?)
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PRESENT DAY. (MID-BOOT ROOM FIGHT WITH ROY KENT, 2023)
If you hadn’t been so consumed by your conversation with one of your fellow coaches, you would have noticed the other two watching you from the window. And as for questions, they had many.
The first is asked by Ted, approximately one minute after he and Beard had stationed themselves outside of the door. “Should we break it up?”
Beard shook his head slowly. “They’ve been tiptoeing around this one since she started,” he replied. “We break this up now, you might lose an arm.”
Ted shifted back on his heels. “You don’t think we can get them to hug it out, do you?”
“That’d be the reason you lose the arm, pal.”
“Yeah, Roy’s not much of a hugger, is he?” The silence that passed between them spoke as an agreement. The two watched as you crossed your arms over your chest, rolling your eyes as Roy seemed to reprimand you. “Do you think this thing between them goes deeper than he let on?”
Beard’s response was immediate. “Oh, yeah. Way deeper.”
“Did we sign ourselves up for something crazy? Something we can’t handle?”
“Oh, yeah,” Beard repeated. Then, he shook his head. “But nothing we can’t handle.”
“Well, then, what do we do?” Ted asked. “Because we can’t have them ‘fine, fine’-ing each other like they’re Sam and Diane all season. The kids ain’t fine, fine, Coach.”
Ted turned to his friend, who’d gone quiet. He followed his sightline to the corner of the Boot Room where Will was hiding, looking as though he were praying to any God who would listen that the two of you wouldn’t notice him.
Pity overtook both of their expressions. “I…” Beard drew out, brow furrowing as he watches Roy pull out his wallet. “...may have an idea.”
When Beard did look over at Ted, there was an excited look in his eye and a wide smile threatening to break out. “I know that voice,” he said. “Am I thinkin’ what you’re thinking?”
“Parent Trap ‘em?” he asked.
Ted grinned. “We really should go on The Newlywed Game.”
“It wouldn’t be fair. We’d sweep.”
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LONDON OLYMPICS. (LATE JULY, 2012)
It’s nearly three in the morning when Roy tells you that your next rally will be your last for the night.
To say you’re thankful would be an understatement. Your lungs are screaming at you and have been for the last fifteen minutes. You can feel the early signs of shin splints with every move you make, and you already know you’re going to wake up tomorrow morning with a ridiculous amount of pain in your hamstrings. 
But you didn’t care. That didn’t matter. What mattered was getting your newfound training companion to shut the fuck up. And the only way to do that was to beat him in this little game he created to a pulp.
It was tragically ironic to find that Roy Kent, a man who was typically of so few words, couldn’t seem to keep quiet when he was playing against you. He had a special sort of talent for getting under your skin, somehow saying the exact thing that would press a specific button that you didn’t even know you had. He was frustrating. Infuriating, even. And there was no shot in hell you were losing to this jackass, especially when you’d managed to tie the score.
(But you’d be lying if you said that you weren’t having at least a little bit of fun.)
However, the relief on your face at his declaration is palpable, and your expression makes Roy raise his brows. “Don’t tell me you’re fucking tired,” he says. “We’ve still got laps to run.”
You throw your head back with an exaggerated groan. “Yeah, yeah, whatever. I know,” you say. “Can we just go so I can beat you and leave?”
Roy’s head tilts. “You’re confident for someone who looks like she’s gonna drop fucking dead.”
“Like you look any better,” you shoot back, eying the grass and dirt that had stained his legs. 
To be fair, you hadn’t lied. Roy didn’t look any better than you did. He was just as roughed up, if not more. There was a sense of pride in that, knowing that he’d had to try as hard to beat you as you did for him. You felt equal. This game had never been equal before.
He seems to know this too. “Well, fucking get on with it then.”
The ball’s at your feet, and you stare down at it as you try to plan how you’re going to attack. What haven’t you done yet? What won’t he be expecting? How can you ensure that--
“Don’t fucking think about it,” you hear him say. When you look up at him in annoyance, he shakes his head. “Just fucking do it.”
But you can’t not think about it. Thinking is what you do. It’s how you stay ahead, it’s how you’ve beaten him in this little game before, it’s how you’re going to beat him now. 
But now you’re frustrated. You wanted to get this over with and prove him wrong and show him up. You’re so sick of hearing him say that and you kick the ball out in front of you to shut him up. And suddenly, you’re playing.
He’s guarding you before you know it. You cut the ball to your left, kicking it through his legs as he tries to meet you. You push your elbow against his chest as you chase down the ball, gritting your teeth when you feel him whip around to recover from his misstep. His chest presses against your shoulder, repeatedly bumping into you each time he works to get the ball from you.
“Come on, Fourteen,” he chides in your ear. “Finish me off like you said you would.”
You shove your shoulder into him again. It’s more forceful this time and the soft sound he makes in response feels like a victory. He drops back to follow you to the goal, which gives you the space you need to maneuver your body into a more comfortable position. 
You’re just outside the box, but you know that whatever move you make next, he’s going to be there to block it. You know his tricks. You’re on track to figuring out how his mind works on the field. Maybe you can outsmart him. Rely on your footwork to psych him out and—
Roy then seems to see you thinking. And he chooses that time to attack. So, footwork it is.
As he nears you, you roll the ball in the opposite direction, keeping an eye on him in your peripheral. Your foot pulls the ball back in a V, then you move it forward to creep into the box. 
He’s still in front of you. While you were quicker, Roy was never one to give up. It was what made him so great on the pitch and so annoying to play against. An idea then sparks: if you can get him to bite, get him close enough to you, you can chop the ball to get him off balance, then spin to get a better angle on the goal.
So, you do exactly that. Or, at least try to.
You swear he can see in your head. That he can read your mind and every thought that crosses it. Because while you do catch him slightly off guard, he recovers the second you try to spin. He’s behind you and before you know it, you’re the one caught off balance. He kicks the ball away from you and out of the box, leaving you to fall on your ass and stain the backs of your thighs.
Fuck. Fuck.
You’re on your back again for the second time today, eyes screwed shut in frustration and disappointment. How had he done it? You swore that was going to work. It’d worked millions of times before, how could it possibly have gone wrong now?
There’s a piece of you that wants to cry. That frustration, that exhaustion, that need to prove yourself had all come crashing down onto your chest, and here you were, in the same place you were before the drill had started.
You don’t even want to look at him. You’re almost too embarrassed to do so. You know that it’s all a part of your deal, that you’re supposed to fail and get better with him, but it’s still a kick in the teeth to end a session like this with a loss. 
You’re able to feel Roy’s presence before you hear him. “Get up,” he tells you.
A loud, shaky sigh escapes you. “I need a second before you run me into the ground, Coach.”
If he notices how your voice wavers, he doesn’t say anything. “Not your coach,” he replies, though he’s speaking softer. “But I’m not running you either.”
You crack an eye open. “Really?”
“C’mon,” he says, holding his hand out for you to take. “Up.”
You stare at his hand for a moment, then cast your eyes up to the starless sky with another heavy sigh. Then, you begrudgingly take his hand, allowing him to yank you up with a strength you’re not expecting.
His hand lingers in yours as you get your bearings. It’s rough and just a bit clammy, but you can’t imagine yours are any better. You’re not looking at him when you remove your hand from his, but find his eyes when he taps your shoulder.
“C’mon,” Roy repeats. He nods over to the track around the field. “Let’s go.”
“I thought we weren’t running,” you mutter.
He glances at you from over his shoulder. “We’re not fucking running,” he responds. “But you need a cool down. Stop your fucking whining and walk with me.”
A scowl appears on your lips at his words, but you relent and follow him. “Fine.”
It’s quiet between you two, giving you a moment to catch your breath and think about what just happened. While you’re thankful that you don’t have to do your laps, so still can’t believe you lost. Yes, it’s just practice, and yes, it doesn’t mean anything, but it’s still… it’s the principal of it. You’ve never been a good loser. You’ve never—
“We need to work on your footwork,” Roy says abruptly, interrupting your train of thought. You glance over at him. “It’s your biggest weakness besides your overthinking.”
A frown pulls at your lips. “My footwork is fine.”
“Yeah. Exactly. It’s fine,” he agrees. “And that’s the fucking problem. Nobody out there can fucking catch you, so you’ve never had to worry about it. But the second you get tighter and more concise…” He shakes his head. “Pair all that with your unpredictability and fucking annoying defense, you’ll blow them all out of the fucking water.”
Pride bubbles in your stomach and rises to your chest. You know that you’re good. And you know that he thinks you’re good. He wouldn’t have taken a chance on you if he hadn’t. But it’s still validating to hear. Especially from him.
But still, you can’t help yourself; “I’m not annoying.”
Roy scoffs, but you can tell he’s biting back a smile. “You are. You’re like a fucking gnat.”
“I am not a gnat,” you gasp. 
“You are. Fucking buzzing in my ear and shit.”
“There’s nothing wrong with being aggressive. You’d know something about that, hypocrite.” When Roy huffs a laugh and shakes his head, you bat him on the arm. “I’m serious. When I crossed you up and hit that corner goal toward the end?” You blow an exaggerated breath and raise your brows at him. “I haven’t seen you that mad since that Arsenal game in like, 2007.”
His response to your jab isn’t what you expected. While you’d anticipated a classic eye roll, a reaction of his that you’d become very familiar with, you get a look of intrigue. “You watched that game?”
“Of course I did,” you respond. Your lips tug into a smile. “I’m a huge Arsenal fan.”
Then you get the eye roll. “You must have been fucking distraught to see your team lose.”
“It was heartbreaking,” you say. “It was fun to see you get thrown out, though.”
“That was a fucking bullshit call,” he scoffs.
“You almost broke Lewis Fox’s leg. And then tried to fight him from the ground.”
“Exactly. Fucking bullshit,” he says. “It shouldn’t count when he’s a prick.”
You allow for a beat of reflection before you respond. “Yeah, he really is a prick, isn’t he?”
That gets you something you haven’t seen from him yet. A smile. A real one, where you can see teeth and all. It’s jarring. And suddenly the pride you felt from his compliments is nothing compared to the feeling you get from this.
It grows as Roy carries on. “The fucking King of them.”
“Prince,” you say in disagreement. “He’s too much of a jackass to honor with a King title. Prince Prick. Duke of Prickland. Court Jester. Whatever.”
“Court Jester?”
“Absolutely,” you reply. “He’d look good in the stupid little hat, too. Would hide the fact that he’s balding.”
Roy barks out a laugh. “He’s going fucking mental over that.”
“I can imagine.” Teasingly, you add, “I guess that’s the one thing you’ve got over him.”
“My hair?”
“Yeah. You’ve got enough to share with him.”
Roy shakes his head again, smile refusing to fade. “Well, thank fucking God it’s something important.”
“Hey, football skills are forever. Hair starts to fade when you hit twenty-five.” You shrug and return his grin. “I’d say you’re winning this one, Kent.”
A labored sigh leaves Roy, like he can’t believe he’s having this type of conversation with you. Frankly, you can’t believe you’re talking like this with him. You’re talking like… friends. It’s strange. Especially after he completely shut you down when talking before.
That thought sinks deep into your mind and you know it won’t go away until you address it. Huh. Maybe he’s right. Maybe you do overthink.
Before you can question that further, you’re speaking. “Hey. I—” You awkwardly cut yourself off as his gaze returns to you. “I just… I wanted to say that I’m sorry if I like, overstepped a boundary back there.” He continues to look at you in response, cueing you to elaborate. “Asking about Sunderland. Leaving your family. That.”
The second you say ‘Sunderland,’ he looks away from you. You grit your teeth as you refrain from cringing, hoping you didn’t ruin what was almost a normal, nice, and friendly moment. That anxiety makes you talk more. 
“You don’t owe me any answers, or anything. We can keep this professional and talk about soccer and how much we both hate Lewis Fox only.” Roy still hasn’t looked at you. “You don’t have to talk to me at all, if you don’t want to. I’m just… pretty open. And I forget that other people aren’t the same way. So…” You trail off, fiddling with your fingers. “I’m sorry.”
He’s quiet for approximately ten seconds. Each feels like agony as you rot in the awkwardness of the silence. Then, he says, “Don’t… fucking apologize for trying to get to know me.”
Well, that’s not what you were expecting at all. “O-Oh.”
“I’m fucking obviously going to talk to you,” he continues, in a way that makes it sound like he’s choosing his words carefully. “But there’s just certain things that I… really fucking hate talking about. And that was one of them.”
You’re nodding before he’ss finished speaking. “Completely understandable.”
Roy looks over at you cautiously. “Yeah?”
“Yeah,” you agree. “Like I said, I’m not entitled to anything. You just let me know when I’ve crossed a line or something.” Your eyes light up in a way that Roy refuses to find endearing. “We can have a codeword or something.”
“A codeword?” he asks wearily.
“Yes, Roy. A codeword.” You stop him in the middle of the track. “Okay, Kent Rule number one. If either of us—”
“What the fuck is a Kent Rule?”
“If either of us,” you repeat, “don’t want to talk about something, we say…” Your eyes scan the field. “Goalpost.”
Roy blinks at you. “That’s a stupid fucking codeword.”
“Okay, you don’t get to shit on my idea and then shit on my codeword, dick,” you say, ignoring the tiny smile that’s growing on his face. “Let me hear yours.”
His eyes scan you up and down. “Gnat.”
“Oh, look who’s fucking annoying now.”
“I think that’s a great one.”
“I think I’m back on Lewis Fox’s side now,” you mutter. Before Roy can roll his eyes, you point at him in excitement. “Fox! That’s our codeword.” Then, you interrupt yourself, by throwing both your hands out. “Wait. Foxtrot. That sounds so much more legit.”
Roy’s had only gotten blanker as you spoke. “I think you should be institutionalized.”
“Kent Rule number one,” you say, ignoring him. “If you don’t want to talk about something, say Foxtrot. We move on, no questions asked.”
“Great.”
“But,” you continue, “you only get one Foxtrot a day.”
“Only fucking one?” he asks.
“Why are you saying it like that?”
“Because you ask a lot of fucking questions.”
You huff. “Fine. No one-a-day rule. But use them sparingly.”
“Can I Foxtrot this conversation?” Roy questions.
You don’t give him the reaction he clearly desires. “Look at you, you’re getting the hang of it!” you cheer, clapping him on the shoulder. “So, does Kent agree to the Kent Rule?”
You receive yet another exasperated shake of the head. “Fucking fine. Yeah. I agree.”
“Wonderful,” you reply, sticking your hand out to him. When he looks down at it, you wiggle your fingers. “We have to shake on it.”
“What?”
“Because it’s not a real agreement if we don’t shake on it,” you answer, as if it’s obvious. “Duh.”
Roy stares at your hand, then at you, and then back at your hand. After a ridiculous amount of time, his shoulders slump in defeat. His hand meets yours and when it does, you beam.
“Institutionalized,” he tells you as you two shake. “I’m fucking serious.”
“And risk your life being way less exciting without me in it?” You put a hand over your heart. “You’d miss me too much.”
And when you grin at him, there’s a piece of Roy that already knows that there might just be a sliver of truth in that.
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