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asterekmess · 4 years

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S3A - E8

I’m realizing just how damn far behind I am on working on season 3, but I don’t wanna skip any episodes of the rewatch, so let’s get to it! Double time, double time!

Content warnings for discussion of cannibalism.

Forewarning, this one is a doozy, so be prepared to Read More:

Lesgo!:

First thing’s first, Derek has experience with those awful sound thingies? Can you imagine how freaked he must’ve been seeing Chris bring those out when they were tracking Boyd and Erica?

Also, Chris Argent has been hunting Derek one way or another since he was a child. Even BEFORE Kate. Why the hell do we have a Derek & Chris broness in the later seasons? This kind of shit doesn’t just go away. I can’t believe I forgot about it.

I love how awkward sweet bby Derek is trying to run through the trees and tripping on branches everywhere. It’s honestly so much more realistic for a teenager than just the crazy cgi stuff. Also, since we know Derek is comfortable in the woods, it really gives you a hint as to how truly messed up he is from fear right now. He’s off balance in a dozen ways.

DEREK HAS BEEN WATCHING PEOPLE DIE IN FRONT OF HIM SINCE HE WAS 15. I’m gonna CRY. If I wanna hurt myself even More, you could argue that the Random Beta (RB) got shot bc he stopped to talk to Derek. So...guilty minds would assume Derek has been watching people die because of him since 15. I hate everything.

PETER comin’ in clutch. Also, hilarious that they use that arrow catching move so much.

I almost like how they tried to make Gerard look younger by just having him wear a douchey leather jacket instead of the serious grandpa one he wears in S2. He swaggers over to the body of RB, and it’s hilarious.

Okay, what is this bullshit about “Bring them back alive, we go by the code?” If you were going by the code then you wouldn’t be fucking hunting them AT ALL. They’re innocent! Why the fuck are you ‘bringing them back’ in the first place? Chris, you piece of shit. This is supposed to demonstrate that you’ve always been a stickler for the code, but all it does is emphasize how little that code actually means. “We hunt those who hunt us.” Fuck off, you hunt anything you deem ‘dangerous’ and find excuses to kill them so you can feel righteous.

Gonna casually note that RB was shot in the Throat with an arrow, but bc of makeup necessities they moved the arrow down to his chest when he’s shown on the ground. It’s funny. :)

It’s seriously so hard to hate Peter, do the writers realize that? Like, yes, he did horrible shit and I’m not denying that, but when you show him running into the hunter-filled woods to save his nephew’s life at 24 years old, then hiding with him in a cellar for two fucking days when he could probably have escaped on his own, it’s hard to see him as a heartless bastard.

I’m almost afraid to find out why Cora knows the details. Can you imagine? She would’ve been, what, 9-10? Her big brother and uncle both go missing for two days after a hunt and she had to stay at home waiting for someone to say they’d found their bodies. God, the lives of the Hales are so fucked up.

The rain is really making the mood here.

I gotta say, I’m confused about this initial Cora-Stiles interaction. He goes on about everyone who’s died or nearly died, but then Cora assumes he wants Derek to do something about the deaths, and Stiles agrees? Except that Derek currently fits the COD that all the other sacrifices have hit. Missing for about two days. Everything Stiles has said implies that he’s worried Derek is also dead. I don’t get why they go with ‘I’m worried about the missing man that I’ve been helping for the last four months because I blame him for the Alphas even coming to town”?

One thing they got on point here is just how disgusting they made Gerard. The slime and the spitting and ugh *shudders* it’s just so gross.

I’m also...I think intrigued is the right word--that they shoved this whole story into the episode without ever addressing the fact that Derek IS missing and they should go looking for him or something. It starts with Stiles asking where the hell he is, but then everything else is about this past moment. Talk about going off on a tangent. I mean, I don’t blame them, but if I shoved this much character background into one chapter people would call me out for the infodump that it is.

Which is all this episode is. Info-dumped exposition. Here’s how werewolves were made. Here’s why Derek’s cranky. Here’s why Duke’s an asshole. Here’s why the Hales are ‘special’

Again, I don’t blame them. It’s just...a lot.

Just a tiny thing: Why do they both roll up their sleeves when Scott only has to touch Gerard’s hand?

It is also very hard to believe that either Allison or Scott are remotely good people when they’re both lying to everyone about Gerard’s existence.

*finger guns, bc now i have to use the tag* I think this is the longest I’ve ever gotten before using it.

Another thing: Why does Gerard make the gross noises like he’s in pain, when we know it doesn’t hurt to get the pain taken away from him? It certainly didn’t hurt that lady in the ER.

I know this is a weird thing to notice, but I find it interesting that Paige is wearing actual makeup. Not just the ‘natural’ look, but eyeshadow that’s visibly dark. *shrug*

Is she Actually playing the cello? The notes Don’t look like they match up with her bowing and fingerings.

HA that music cut in is fucking Hilarious. Derek turns around like he’s in a teen rom-com, with that casual “I never stop smiling all the way bc I’m the coolest guy around” grin and the music just WHAM. That’s right, Derek Hale used to be a JOCK. He didn’t used to be ‘a lot like Scott.’ He was a lot like JACKSON.

So, this group of cronies Derek has. What is that about? He’s gotta have that posse just like Jackson did in S1? Unnamed people to cackle at his jokes.

Paige’s face, right there? That is the SHIT for me. That’s not hidden attraction, that’s genuinely “What the fuck is my life, why are you so lame?” and I am LIVING for it.

Derek peacocking is also hilarious. Peacocking so hard he (THE WEREWOLF) didn’t notice that she’d left the hall, is even more so.

I hate to tell you this Paige, but THAT is where I could tell you liked him. Giving in to his bullshit offer was the first step, that look on your face when he said, “Hold on” was Blatant “Holy shit, my crush wants to talk to me” but then all you idiots did was make eye contact. Paige, if you’re trying to get the ball, try looking away from those pretty eyes, okay?

Derek, you always go too far. You can see Paige lose interest when she realizes that he’s not actually into Her, he’s into showing off.

OOOF, i guess they weren’t such good friends after all, cus’ they left when Paige did.

I also feel the need to point out Derek is WEARING A CHECKERED SHIRT. *inarticulate screaming* Everyone who makes jokes about him thinking plaid is disgusting owes me five bucks bc he CLEARLY didn’t think checkers/plaid were that bad when he was in high school.

I’ll admit...the instant sorry is like...really good. If they’d had him come in and be More of a dick and then end up together, I’d be a lot more bugged. But his First real introduction to her is an apology.

THEN he goes back to being a dick. But at least this time it’s not about him, he wants to know about Her.

And I LOVE the turnaround! THIS is flirting. THIS is cute teasing. She plays his game Back at him, shows her own skill and forces him to get on her level. Then he weasels out of it, but in a Cute Way.

If there’s one thing that I’m routinely impressed by in TW it’s the scoring. They’re Really good with music to fit the moods and the vibes of the whole episode. For instance, all the transition music in this episode is Cello, bc it’s about Paige.

I hate agreeing with Gerard on Anything, but he makes a good point about the Dark Druid taking and killing someone else right alongside Deaton. Why would she take 4 people when she only needed three? She wouldn’t know that Deaton got a message out or that Scott would save Deaton. Plus the addition of the mountain ash circle is kind of weird, don’t you think?

Yah, I have no clue why your body is producing anything Either. You literally make no sense and you shouldn’t be alive. Period. Bringing you back was a lazy way to have someone who could be a sub-sub plot and hand out exposition and red herrings that are totally useless.

HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT GERARD? You weren’t There when Deucalion found out he could still see with his Alpha Eyes (Which makes no sense btw, he doesn’t have TWO sets of eyes???) and if you’d interacted with Deuc since then he’d have ripped you to shreds.

SERIOUSLY people, why the FUCK are we getting this information from Gerard when it makes WAY more sense for Deaton to tell them this? He was THERE for the whole thing!

I get that the point of the episode is supposed to be “Unreliable Narrators” (The whole show has an unreliable narrator.) but you had that covered with Peter’s story. You could’ve Instilled TRUST in Deaton by making a contrast and having Deaton TELL THEM THE TRUTH. Show the difference between reliable and unreliable. Gerard doesn’t need to be here!

Stiles, asking the real questions.

AND GETTING THE MOST BULLSHIT ANSWER IN THE UNIVERSE.

Could these writers GET any lazier? Put some fucking effort in and give us some information about Werewolves IN YOUR WEREWOLF TV SHOW.

What the fuck were Paige and Derek into that they knew where an abandoned distillery was when it wasn’t even in TOWN? And you’re telling me they left town every time they wanted to make out? Even worse, are you implying they had SEX in that distillery? And then trying to tell me that none of the fucking Alphas and their packs noticed the smell of Derek and his girlfriend all over the building?

...what...do people seriously not remember being teenagers? What the fuck Peter? In what fucking universe is “one minute it’s ‘i hate you, don’t talk to me’ the next it’s frantic groping in any dark corner’ remotely accurate to real life?

Teenagers in the majority don’t DO that. I really fucking hate that all teenagers are made out to be like this. Like they’re “run by their hormones” and “everything is sex to you” STOP. Seriously, STOP. Saying shit like that completely negates the fact that Teenagers are Real fucking People. They’re not just buckets of hormones and sweat that need to be shaped into an adult. They’re fucking PEOPLE and reducing them to sex-crazed idiots is lazy and stupid.

Are you ALSO telling me that the hunters dragged RB’s DEad Body to an abandoned building, then strung the corpse up and cut it in half? AND that someone happened to go the abandoned building and found the body and called the cops, or that they MOVEd the two halves somewhere they would be found, Or that They were the ones to call and report the body?

Has teen wolf got even a Single brain cell?

ALSO, what the fuck is this timeline? Derek and Peter went missing for two days after RB was killed, but the packs don’t get together to discuss RB’s death until After Derek has run out of the building with Paige because he could smell blood from RB being hemisected. So, they waited at Least two days before talking to each other about RB’s death? And Derek apparently recovered Instantaneously from his two day nightmare and went right back to macking on his girlfriend and laughing freely the Day he was found? Or did they wait even longer? I’m so fucking confused!

Okay, you tell me that this place is their favorite makeout/groping spot, but they seriously just walk in the door and start kissing in the middle of the room? You guys didn’t bring some blankets and pillows here? You’re gonna stand there the whole time?

WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU MAKING PETER A PERVERT? He was fucking watching his nephew make out with his girlfriend through the wall??? WHat is WRONG with you?

ALSO, Cora was alive and active in Derek’s life at that point. She wasn’t That young. She could easily point out that Peter being Derek’s best friend is total bullshit if it weren’t actually true. Which means Peter is telling the TRUTH here. Hell, she doesn’t call out his heartbeat for lies the entire time, and while they imply at the end of the episode that Really Good Liars can just force their heart to be steady while lying so they don’t get caught, that isn’t a thing for the entire rest of the show. Derek trusts KATE when she says she’s not lying. So the evidence actually points toward Peter telling the TRUTH in this entire episode.

THAT is accurate to teenagers. Using the word “like” and “liking” so many times in a conversation that it doesn’t even sound like a word anymore.

Paige...dude, I’m so torn. Like I’m glad you’re being honest with Derek about your worries, but also it’s a complete dick move to just Assume that he’s gonna bail? To say to his face that you Know he’s leaving you and you’re just waiting for it? Fucking rude.

Ennis...bro...how exactly did your Beta “Accidentally” kill a hunter? How would that happen?

AGAIN WITH THE TIMELINE. If the packs only CAME to beacon hills because of Ennis issue with the hunters, why was RB running through beacon hills when he was killed?

Also, side note: Where are all of these werewolves staying? Are they territorial so they like, all claimed different hotels to take over? Or do they not mind, and THAT’S why the Hale house is so big for such a small family? Because they had a ton of guest rooms for packs that visited to get that sweet, sweet Hale Wisdom?

I firmly believe that werewolves are clothing-optional people. Talia straight shifts into a naked human form in front of over a dozen other wolves.

Also, where the hell is the Hale pack here? Some random chick comes up and gives Talia a robe, but that person is standing with Deuc’s pack. So....what?

I’m so curious about the formation the wolves make when they hear Talia coming. Everybody backs away, except Deucalion. And they do this weird focus on his face as he watches her come in. And her eye contact is JUST with him.

OH GROSS. DID DEUC HAVE A THING FOR DEREK’S MOM????

I will admit that watching things with subtitles sometimes ruins the surprise. There’s that little pause before “I’m just a deputy” like it was supposed to be shocking to the audience, but the subtitle on Amazon Prime just Pops up right away and it kind of ruins the effect.

Here we go! The one piece of concrete information on “Packs” and “pack members” that we’re given in the whole fucking show. Word for Word. “Losing a member of your pack isn’t like losing family, it’s like you lose a limb.”

That is....severe. Now imagine that your entire family IS your pack. And losing almost every one of them. Is it any wonder that Cora, Peter, and Derek are so messed up? That they’re so dark and wounded looking?

I s2g sometimes Peter literally just sounds like he’s a self-insert for the writers. He explains shit that the writer’s are showing Really Badly as if to wave away the fact that the Ennis flashback is pretty much Completely unnecessary. “You just don’t understand my artistic genius, it’s never just a single moment, it’s a confluence of events. I have to show you all these random flashbacks because you need to understand why Derek is soaked in MANPAIN all the time. Which is totally relevant to the current plot bc....bc....bc ART (and also Tyler Hoechlin was busy so we could only get one shot of him for the entire episode)”

That is just the cutest shit oh my god. Derek listens to Paige’s music while he’s in class and doing homework. THAT is love, you realize? He doesn’t just deal with her dedication to her music, he loves it.

THat little wince when he says “Are you sure about that?” Paige knows he’s gonna screw with her.

THAT IS A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP. He gives her space! She likes studying during lunch so he Leaves her Alone. I LIKE IT.

What do you mean “Laura told you about the packs being here.” Derek KNOWS they’re here because he watched RB DIE IN THE WOODS. Seriously, I”M SO CONFUSED.

FUN FACT (that I might’ve already shared) Oak wood was liked by the Celts because it was really sturdy and hardy and bore food, but it wasn’t their favorite type of wood! Rowan was the favorite, and Irish pagan practitioners used to sleep in rowan trees so they could have prophetic dreams. After that, it was Hazelwood. :P

I...do not enjoy when they bring up the Celtic Druids. *Scuttles to get my textbook bc this is my nerd shit*

“We’re in a Nemeton” This is the correct wording, actually! A “Nemeton” isn’t a thing, it’s a “sacred meeting place” as Chris calls it. Go chris! Nemeton refers to the entire grove/area around the main tree.

I can’t speak to whether they chose a ‘Large, older tree in a grove” but it does make sense bc if we’re talking about Oaks they were a symbol of food and safety (acorns were a staple to Celtic diets) so choosing an older tree would not only look more impressive, but it would probably bear more acorns for the clan.

“It would represent the center of the world” *Puts on vine voice* THat is NOt Correct! The tree at the center of the Nemeton was called a “crann bethadh” or “Tree of Life” and it was essentially a Totem that marked the center of the tribe’s territory. It was not ‘the center of the world’ it was the center of THEIR world. Their land.

“There was a belief that cutting or harming the tree would cause serious problems for the surrounding villages” Not sure if ‘villages’ is the correct term for the era, but the rest of it sounds like a close mistranslation. See, in Ireland there were raids people would do against other clans where the SOLE PURPOSE was to destroy their crann bethadh, because it was demoralizing. It’s like graffiti-ing the front of a church. But technically, it WAS severely frowned upon to harm the tree in any way.

This is mostly because in most Celtic areas, Oak trees were considered symbols of the “Father of the Sky” or the “God of Thunder.” Of course you don’t wanna piss off Thunder man.

Also, you notice how I’m saying CELTS and not DRUIDS. It’s because DRUID isn’t a cultural label, it’s a SOCIAL CLASS. It’s like saying “The Educated”

Okay, back to the--OH WAIT. Before anyone gets any ideas, the blood on the crann bethadh isn’t human. Estonian Celts smeared animal blood on the tree roots as an assurance for rain and good harvests. This is the same concept as TONS of other religions, including Christianity. (Abraham was supposed to sacrifice his son, Isaac, to God, but God stopped him and had him sacrifice a Ram instead. So, Yes. Christians used to perform animal sacrifices.)

NOW back to the show.

THe fact that gerard doesn’t know this stuff implies that Chris is the nerd of the family.

I LIKE THIS. I hate that I like it bc it’s Gerard, but I LIKE IT. Gerard gets up from his wheelchair. He doesn’t need it All the Time.

I’ve never seen another show that bothered to have a wheelchair user who wasn’t wheelchair-bound, which is stupid because it’s Very Common for people using wheelchairs to not need them all the time.

though it does beg the question of why he’s sitting in a wheelchair when he’s in his own bedroom? Was he going somewhere? Or did he know he wouldn’t have enough chairs and didn’t want Allison or Scott to sit in his chair?

The story of Lycaon, who was considered a savage ruler of Arcadia and Zeus went to his house disguised as a human (this is v common in myth) to find out if he was batshit. Lycaon and his FIFTY SONS (he also had one daughter) wanted to know if the stranger was a human or a mortal, so they fed him human flesh in stew. Zeus flipped shit and blasted the room with thunderbolts, murdering all but one of Lycaon’s sons, and then turned Lycaon into a wolf.

So...this whole ‘myth of lycaon’ is totally fucked up when it didn’t need to be? Like, they didn’t NEED to change it to make it a messed up origin story of wolves. It already was.

There’s three major versions to choose from

Lycaon was a pius man who founded the city of Lycosura on Mount Lycaeus and used a child as a sacrifice to Zeus, thinking it would please him. Zeus flips shit and turns Lycaon into a wolf. FROM THEN ON; at every sacrifice made to zeus a man was transformed into a wolf and if he managed to restrain himself from eating human flesh for 8-9 years, he would be turned human again.

The same story as the first, except Lycaon Knew Zeus was in disguise and the child he fed him was Zeus’ own son, and it was revenge for seducing his only daughter Callisto.

If you want to make it match what you’ve already said about wolves in the show, they could’ve used the last one and it would’ve demonstrated how Ingrained the concept of vendetta/revenge is for wolves.

If you wanted to focus on the Turning Human part and working with Celtic Druids to learn to become werewolves, you could’ve used the second one.

there was no reason to add in the bullshit about Prometheus except as an excuse to make Deucalion look like he picked his name to be an asshole, which he fucking didn’t.

I’m so sorry about all the classical shit (i’m really not) but I studied it in college and I can’t just let this bullshit stand.

I’ll give them a pass on the ‘the lesser known part’ bc it’s technically plausible for the wolves to have run north to the Celts and beg for help, And the Druids (those who’s education was specifically in magic, not all of them) were known for shapeshifting (though not usually into animals. They did that to Other people, not themselves)

I cannot believe this is so long, i’m so sorry.

But WHY tho, Cora? How is an Emissary supposed to keep you connected to humanity if No ONe KNows Who They Are?? How are they supposed to do their job??

Yeah, well now Deaton is a sour bitch who has a chip on his shoulder against the Hale pack so like...fuck his advice.

I will say though! Pre-fire Deaton doesn’t give me the heebies like post-fire Deaton. He’s much more clear about the advice he’s giving, and it’s actually helpful! He still has a dumb little anecdote/parable about the scorpion and the frog (which...in most circumstances I hate. It doesn’t even match what happens) but he gives Real Advice instead of vague asshole nonsense.

“I’m an Alpha, I never walk alone.” I have an inordinate affection for this line.

Paige is clearly some kinda bad bitch if she thought nothing of going to hang out in the school in the middle of the night with Derek.

Okay, but like...why would he attack Ennis like that if he was the one who asked him to bite Paige? And why is the moment played up “A fifteen-year-old boy against a giant” Derek was literally swatted to the side while Ennis walked out of the building. this wasn’t some big showdown.

If she’d already been bitten, why was Ennis still grabbing at her??

....seriously? Peter is literally right there? And no one noticed?

Again with the “Scott is a genius now” LIsten, bro, why the fuck would Scott know a sanskrit fable? If he Did know a story like that, it would be bc Deaton taught him. In which case he would know the FROG and the scorpion. Come on, guys.

OH MY GOD GERARD DOES IT TOO. GERARD, PETER, AND DEUC all have a CHRONIC case of verbal diarrhea when they’re trying to be intimidating.

I do NOT understand this warehouse scene. It’s a GAS gerard, if you stabbed yourself with some sort of...antidote or whatever it wouldn’t save you from the GAS you’re inhaling. At the very least you would be shouting like everyone else because it HURTS going in.

why did it take so long for Talia to come? It’s implied that Peter left to get her, so why did it take so long? Even PAST peter looks fucked up at seeing that Paige is dying, it’s not like he would wait.

I’ll be real, i get weepy so i’m skipping the actual death. Just know that it hurts me. Severely.

Y’all know how much I hate this ‘innocent life’ bullshit for blue eyes. It’s very True Alpha-y in that it’s impossible to pin down the specifics. What constitutes an ‘innocent life’? What constitutes taking it? With wolf claws? With a gun? What counts and what doesn’t count? Ugh.

Eyyy, so I’m exhausted and this is so long that my computer is fritzing. There are five minutes left and nothing happens in them at all. Just Scott pointing out the heartbeat thing and threatening to kill Gerard (so he’s still fine with murder at this point in time. Good to know). Stiles telling Cora that he doesn’t think Peter was telling the truth (which she would Know if he wasn’t) and that he’s gonna ask Derek about it (which we never got to see). And Deucalion murdering his own Beta (who, tbf, tried to kill him first. Which, again, what the fuck is up with Deaton’s office that wolves are able to rip each other apart in it, but it’s still ‘hard for someone like Scott to cause me any trouble.’ I’m just so confused

Final Thoughts: This episode actually had some interesting stuff in it, which is kind of sad considering there was no PLOT, just Exposition. I look forward to tweezing the bits out that I want and dumping the rest in the garbage where it belongs. Oh, and like I said, the music was on Point.

#personal #anti-Scott McCall #TeenWolf-Rewatch #long post

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pilferingapples · 6 years

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Episode 5a: Green Finch and Cosette Bird

Not gonna try to Chronology this bc despite my best efforts I have NO idea what time span this is all supposed to be covering, like if it’s weeks or months or, as it appears to be, all happening in one Really Busy Week

Before I get into it: As always , major props for the Props people, and the set design team on this show. Whatever my other issues about the series, I’ve loved the look of the places, and there’s some real nice touches in every scene. They make rewatching it all worth it just for the visuals.

...More mixed feelings under the cut, but I did enjoy some things besides the setting!:

HELLO HELLFONT MY OLD FRIEND , what can I say, it’s becoming a familiar (type)face , any friend in a storm

-I really enjoy this opening-- setting up that the people in Paris really ARE at about ready to riot and everyone really is angry, it’s not just Those Kids in A Bar Somewhere. It feels very A Few Pages of History, (4.1 , for those wondering!) and I’m glad it’s being given some time.

-I am ALSO Highly Entertained that all this deep rooted and widespread social unrest is juxtaposed with flyers of THAT DASTARDLY VALJEAN. I’m sure to this Javert they’re exactly the same thing-- and I mean I am SURE because Javert tells us so directly:

Rivet or Rivette or whatever: Uh boss we have intel on an attempt at overthrowing the government and I mean Parisians actually do that not infrequently of late so IDK but I think we have bigger issues than your Nemeship

Javert, Verbatim: THERE IS NO. LARGER. ISSUE. MAN, Mark My Words, Where Ever You Find Unrest, HE Will Be At The Very Heart Of It

THIS IS THE BEST THING THIS JAVERT HAS EVER SAID but it’s just gonna get better and I am SO here for Hilariously Overinvested In One Rando Thief Javert, he’s got basically nothing to do with Javerts Past and I do not CARE, this is hilarious

- Cutting over to Valjean and Cosette, with Cosette nursing his really oozy arm wound! I am NOT satisfied with Valjean’s “well I had to go back to the Thenardiers for Reasons” line at ALL, especially not when Cosette was so clearly retraumatized. I would accept a Scheme on his end, a moral argument, ANYTHING, but she’s just like “so this is awful” and he’s all “but Cosette, REASONS” . Also not satisfied with Cosette denouncing people as Evil! or Valjean signing off on it! I understand why she’s saying it from a Watsonian perspective but the show has chosen to set this up, to have the characters most associated with redemption and recovery ready to directly condemn. This Cosette is infinitely more judgemental, and I can see why, because holy smokes this Valjean. And this is a fairly brief moment in the show but it’s just off for what this story and these characters represent.

- Meanwhile, in Some Cafe I Guess, Enjolras has some terrible lines about the upcoming revolution that make it seem like this has been a pickup game planned since all of last week and I have horrible foreshadowing of Fandom Arguments to Come.

Also: this is not the fandom I think we are if we can’t just Nominate some Remaining Amis out of this mess of extras! I’ll go first; I nominate the bearded guy in the corner during Enjolras’ speech about Lamarque (at ~~4:43) for Bahorel, and the dark-haired guy in front of him for Joly.

-I love how grim the women’s prison is; also, Mme T trying to be as good a mother as she knows how to be even here. (Also I know they probably should NOT be in the same prison together, but this is one of those condensations that I Get)

- I’m sure a lot of people are gonna hate it, but I actually really appreciate that this Marius is rather cold and unpleasant to Eponine post-Gorbeau, when she’s taking him to see Cosette. That is canon! He’s quite rude and even physically rough with her when he sees her again! It’s an important aspect of his character; he gets caught up with his current Only Thing In The World and treats other people around him badly, it’s a running thing! Heck, this Marius is still kinder to Eponine post-Gorbeau than his book counterpart. I feel awful for Eponine, of course, but then I absolutely should. This is a Good Bit.

-Thenardier escapes from prison by pretending to have Died of Dysentery--er, cholera! If they’re not gonna have Gav and the whole Escape By Night scene, this is actually a pretty clever, quick way to get Thenardier out, and build in the info about the cholera epidemic. I can never be exactly glad to lose Gavroche Scenes, but this was a pretty good way to abridge that!

- Valjean’s arm is better! So it’s been Some Vague Time! So he’s leaving for Mysterious Valjean Purposes (money), with a blithe “Cosette stay here, it’s safe but also don’t leave the house until I get back, also you can’t come with me because it’s dangerous, but don’t worry it’s TOTALLY safe.” If this Valjean were more the warm, loving character he should be, this might just seem awkward and badly phrased; with all that’s happened between them already and all that comes next, this just seems manipulative and cruel.

-Vajlean goes out into the streets and sees ...a drawing that doesn’t really look like him! On a wanted poster! So he tears it down. Javert’s Valjeany Sense Activates and his eyes open in his office when Valjean tears down the poster Who Knows Where. This delights me. DELIGHTS. This Javert is a hilarious parody of all Javerts and I officially love it.

-I also like Thenardier and...Montparnasse?-- and someone else..?why is this scene so dark -- in the sewers, and the cut from that to Cosette. Nice way to stress the actual real danger that Valjean’s left her in, also: good Cat Scare before Marius happens. (yeah and also Thenardier seems to be Leader of the Patron Minette, which is never my Fave Choice for an adaptation to make, but it makes sense, especially as breakneck as things are moving

-Toussaint’s Cheerful Doomy Dooms of Doom while Valjean leaves her and Cosette to do his Secret Valjean Thing; since Enjolras has banned romantics from the barricade, guess we gotta take our cheerful death talk where we can! (also, totally canon!)

-okay, you know what, I really like Cosette’s scenes in the garden. This Cosette is doing a great job of selling me on her Extremely Young-ness. She seems young enough and unworldly enough that a Magic Boyfriend sneaking in without her noticing is Cool and Exciting and Magical instead of super unnerving. She’s adorable. And there is really excellent framing here with the flowers and the lighting and all. It does feel like a fairy tale, which, it really should; this is Cosette’s fairy tale romance and I’m happy for her.

...Unfortunately this Valjean is rather too much the part of the Ogre Parent and I wish Marius would just take her away. Uhg. (also I haaaate this bgm. HAAAATE. I am not talking about it much and I know it’s probably just me but it is so obtrusive to me!)

- Gavroche shows up, robbin’ all the randos and giving bread to a couple of genuinely unrelated street kids! I...am having such mixed feelings! I love this actor; this actor has Gavroche absolutely DOWN and I am accepting him into my heart entirely but...like...why is this part of the story here, why is there so much emphasis on him being a thief, why does he just leave the momes instead of trying to take them in, why is this show trying to make it visually clear that these aren’t his brothers? this is just..it’s the thing that keeps happening where there are a bunch of changes for no apparent reason and they don’t add up to anything new but they also aren’t the Original Thing and I can’t figure out what the point of those alterations really are (though this scene, with the extra thieving and reduced generosity, grand-total steals some of Gavroche’s heroism). The actor is amazing but GIVE HIM HIS FULL BIT.

- back to Definitely Some Cafe (it’s really well done, I just have no idea what cafe it is ? It’s full of workers, maybe this is supposed to be the Corinth?) and a brief, foolish moment on my part of hoping there’ll be more discussion of why the rebellion is happening is Destroyed and turned to “you rich students can go back to your families in the country but--” THIS IS THE GHOST OF MY ASKBOX FUTURE AND I HATE IT , OH SPIRITS; WHAT MAY I DO TO TURN THIS NIGHTMARE ASIDE

-...why isn’t this worker just...Feuilly...why are none of the workers Feuilly...

-P.sure my Joly HC is here

either that or he’s BBC’s Merlin which might explain some things

- Awkwardness of Lost Historical Context aside, this Enjolras is growing on me (like a scruffy beard!) . He’s intense and physically affectionate and I like that in an Enjolras; I just think it’s weird that he’s hanging out with what are apparently random students who haven’t committed to the revolution frigging yet , but you know! Whatever!

- ...I am currently kind of on the fence about this but...if they’re not gonna give the whole arc with Grantaire As Symbol of the Apathetic Bourgeois being Converted the time it needs, I ...think? ..what they’re doing here might be a serviceable substitute? He’s very obviously Not Got The Revolution Fever and is Doing It For His Friends, and he’s obviously super uncomfortable about it. I like this take on that so far better than some versions I’ve seen.

ATM, gotta say, the Amis Scene is bugging me the least. If it weren’t for the absolutely bizarre nonsense last week, I would be Pretty Okay with the Amis stuff?? WEIRD BUT TRUE. Or maybe just a sign of how some adaptations have totally destroyed my expectations here to the point where “Enjolras isn’t actually Dracula” is Okay With Me. ANYWAY I’LL TAKE IT, A MOMENT OF LIKABLE CHARACTERIZATION.

-The Revolutionary conversation segues with a cut to the Royalist Salon and Gillenormand, who is NOT likeable and I’m not sure why we get this scene Here In Particular? A contrast to the revolutionaries, I guess? But this Gillenormand continues to be very very accurate.

- At The House In The Garden, Valjean is back! Cosette comes to hug him! He apparently WAS worried that she wouldn’t be safe so what was with the reassurances earlier like she was being a stupid child! And most important

WHY DOES VALJEAN HAVE A BACK LACING WAISTCOAT WHY DID HE WEAR THAT ON HIS TRIP AWAY WHO LACED HIM UP WHILE HE WAS GONE AAAAAAAAH

okay I’m okay

- wait NO I’m NOT because now it’s time for the Patron Minette to come in and not-rob this place and the show completely destroys Eponine’s moment as the guardian of Marius and Cosette’s happiness! Instead of her getting to intimidate a bunch of grown armed men into retreat, she’s attacked, threatened, and ultimately rendered passive, her moment of heroism rendered null when no one comes to her scream, and her role in saving the Valjean house and all in the garden replaced by an actual dog. I am really pretty furious about this! But the Character Destruction Of Eponine deserves its own post so Moving On FOR NOW...

- ...also are you telling me THIS hyper paranoid, aggressive JVJ doesn’t notice or react to screams and barking dogs

- holy moly even kneeling Marius is almost as tall as Cosette, that’s not relevant to anything but it’s entertaining to me; it’s also Very Cute to have him comforting her by making himself smaller than her, when they’re both freaking out about her imminent maybe-move.

- Valjean having a conversation with Eponine instead of just getting her note to move is not inherently The Worst! But the way he treats her just reinforces how cold and uncaring he is. There’s no compassion in him for a poor abused girl who could almost have been his daughter, no concern for how she might be faring, not even an awkward “hey be careful”. Is it understandable? Yeah, sure. A lot of selfish focus is Understandable and human. But it’s not admirable, it’s not kind, it’s not the actions or attitude of a man who’s learned kindness towards the world through love, or who tries to put others first to the point that it would kill him. It makes sense, for some characters-- but it’s just not Valjean.

-NICOLETTE IS THE HERO THIS ADAPTATION NEEDS and she’s SO happy to announce that Marius is back to talk to his awful awful Grandpa!

- The whole scene with Marius asking Gillenormand for permission to marry is very satisfyingly awful and I have no complaints. It’s a bit abbreviated, and I wonder if people who don’t know the era will totally get that this is a question of needing adult legal approval? but it’s not shortened beyond the amount that Adaptational Space might suggest. I’d take this little scene as a good illustration of the Gillenormand/Marius dynamic for anyone. Also: is that the Yellow Prisoner-Crafted Wallpaper??? BBC Set Design People, you’re the BEST

- I know I’ve already given kudos to the props and set people but I LOVE this little bachelor apartment that Marius and Courfeyrac are sharing, this is so great?? I’ve seen sketches from the era that look so much like this! Give me a moment to squeak happily about this place-- the low roof! The clothesline! The clutter! I love it! (@ about 30:00)

- I HATE EVERYTHING ENJOLRAS SAYS HERE THOUGH, even if I intend to meme out No Romantic Daydreamers to the FULLEST

-Cutting back to Valjean and Cosette’s house, I also hate that Cosette defense-flinches when she wakes up! It’s been eight years! That should not still be her auto-reflex if she’s come to feel safe and loved! My heart!

Valjean tells her they have to move today. Valjean does NOT tell her where they’re going. Valjean gives her an hour to pack--and Cosette has to run out and ask Toussaint what the address will be and has to LIE TO TOUSSAINT about why she needs it. Valjean, there are secrets you might feel a need to keep from your daughter. WHERE SHE LIVES should not be one of them. “I’m taking you to an address no one knows and also you can’t have it ahead of time” is what kidnappers do! Watching Cosette write her note and move (terrible bgm and all) is breaking my heart--she is so alone in this house--no one is on her side, no one is there to listen to her, no one is really considering her feelings or giving her any explanations, she’s being moved around like a pet. The abuse is less florid than with the Thenardiers, but it’s still there, and I want to cry.

The scene goes from soldiers marching outside the window of the new apartment to the funeral. Aaaand that seems like a good place to break this giant review in two.

Randoming Fandoming:

-I’m pretty sure that at around 6:14 a woman and kid in modern clothes just wander in the background behind Marius! This is not a Complaint, these things happen to any production, but it’s fun to have spotted?

#Oh Red Hellfont I'll Miss You Most of All #Beeble Mis #Beeble Mis 5: Who Gave You A Gun #Beeble Mis recaps #long post #holy smokes long post #abuse mention

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