#Jaques Ze Whipper

[randomwordzard]

"oh my godh... it is le zach jle zipper..."

-@shipeishei

[insoucianceart]

I should be working on confounding episode 2 rn but like…

him

[mightbebobbie]

u seem like the kind of person who likes jaques ze whipper without the mustache

what the fuck is a jaques ze whipper and i most definetely would like the mustache, i love mustaches

[steele-soulmate]

Tattooed Wings, CHAPTER 593, Peter Steele & OFC, Soulmate AU

SUMMARY: Mary Claire Bradley meets her soulmate- literally- the famous Peter Steele of metal group Type O Negative. But will obstacles including trauma, stalkers, and toxic family members get in the way of their life?

WARNING: mentions of child rape (nothing graphic) PTSD, milk kink, soft smut, grinding, assault, fingering, hand jobs, blow jobs, 69, P in V sex, blood, noncon rape, violence, death, vandalism, graffiti, attempted kidnapping, break-ins, wild animal attacks, terrorist attack (sabotage) consensual impregnation, bareback, impregnation kink, creampies, terrorist attacks (shootings) hit and run pedestrian accident, precipitous labor, neonatal death, abandoned baby, child intoxication, death of a minor character, injured baby, kidnapped child

A NOTE FROM THE AUTHORESS:

Welp, I started writing another Peter Steele FanFiction. Let me know down before in a comment if you want me to start posting it!

WORDS: 1210

I giggled as I kept an eye on little girl and the babies just having fun bopping all over the Chuck E Cheese. I couldn’t help but notice Christopher refusing to interact with any of the kids, instead moving away from his mom whenever she would try to talk to him.

“Hey, can I try?” I asked her, nudging her elbow. “Mom to mom, sometimes kids need someone else to talk to.”

“Yeah, would you please?”

I smiled at her before taking a seat next to Christopher, my mommy senses telling me that the pack of Ratajczyk children were safe and off having fun.

“Hihi, your name is Christopher, isn’t it?” I hummed gently, giving him the choice to interact with me or not.

“Yes.”

I smiled at his quiet meep, taking the chance to ask him about his book, a tattered edition of one of the Magic Treehouse books.

A quiet spark appeared in his eyes before he began to excitedly chatter my ear off about Shakespearean history and the Tudor dynasty.

“Have you ever been to a renaissance faire?” he asked me, wonder and amazement crossing over his face when I informed him that I worked as a player for two of the biggest faires on the east coast. “Wow, that’s so cool!”

“Do you know who Jaques Ze Whipper is?” I asked him, taking out my cell phone

“Are you ready, kids?” James yelled as he beat out a tempo using his trusty whips.

“AYE AYE CAPTAIN!”

“I can’t hear you!”

“AYE AYE CAPTAIN!”

“Oooooooooooooh…

Who draws on a mustache and acts like a clown?”

“Jaques Ze Whipper!”

“If you ever see him you won’t ever frown!”

“Jaques Ze Whipper!”

“Is French whipping something that you want to see?”

“Jaques Ze Whipper!”

“Then come on everyone and sing with me!”

“Jaques Ze Whipper!

Jaques Ze Whipper!

Jaques Ze Whipper!

Jaques Ze Whipper!

Jaques Ze Whipper!”

My friend since childhood finished up the song by miming playing a little horn.

“That’s Vanessa’s Papa Bear,” he pointed out.

“I know he is, but he also goes by Jaques Ze Whipper at faires and other such events,” I shrugged.

“Wowiee…” He broke off and peered around me, catching sight of Peter on his knee, allowing little girl access to kiss the sleeping triplet’s foreheads. “That’s Vanessa’s Papa Pete.”

“He is, yes,” I confirmed. “He is the best daddy in the world to the kids.” And he is also the best daddy to me, my mind told me, but I batted that away with a light blush tinging my befreckled cheeks.

“Can he be my daddy?” Christopher wondered. “My daddy went to heaven.”

My heart broke into clear pieces as his whole story was revealed to me. His father had died, leaving behind a wife and a son. I collected Cristopher as he leaned deeply into me, welcoming my arm to wrap around him.

“He had been living in the hospital, and one day, mommy told me that we wouldn’t be visiting him anymore,” he frowned, picking at his jeans.

Poor baby, I frowned, looking up as Christopher’s mother reapproached us, having nipped off to pay a visit to the bathroom to powder her nose.

“I haven’t seen Christopher this calm in a hot minute!” she said before picking up on the somber mood between the both of us. “He told you about his dad?” I could only nod- no child out there should lose a parent so suddenly. “What would you do?”

“Be honest- what else could I do?” I shrugged, reaching up to wipe at my leaking eyes. “When Baby Violet Marie passed, Peter had some of her ashes made into bracelets for the kids to wear. The both of us also welcome the kids to come to us and talk about their emotions, and we also heavily encourage them to follow their interests- dance and theater for Elizabeth, color guard and Chinese for Katie and the babies are coming into their own- Baby Tommy is keenly interested in ballet and cooking though.”

“Oh,” she hummed, and I realized that Christopher had fallen asleep leaning up against me, his itty bitty fingers entangled in my loose curls. “I follow you on Instagram, I really wish I was more like you, but I work as a nurse for mentally disabled kids, so at the end of the day when I get home from my job, I just want to crash in bed. But first, I have Christopher to take care of- homework, dinner, tucking him into bed…”

“Don’t you have any upcoming days off?” I asked her, my heart only cracking all the more at her head shake as a “No” answer.

“Not since before Henry died.” She rushed to explain herself. “It is sadly extremely expensive to live today, especially in New York. I am working to save for the both of us to move back to my hometown in Minnesota. My parents still live there and the schools are nice. Christopher will only prosper there.”

“Ah,” I hummed, understanding her reasoning. “May I offer you some advice?”

“Sure, go ahead,” she answered as Baby Tommy appeared in the doorway to the party room, worry written clear as day over his chubby face.

“Wait a little bit if you can before announcing that you’re moving due to your husband’s death,” I advised her, looking up as little girl began to race towards me. “Moving so soon after his passing might lead to him rebelling against you in more ways than you might like.”

“Mommy,” he wept. “A man pushed kicked liddle gurl and took Baby Noah!”

“What?” I gasped, looking up as Peter and Elizabeth herded the kids back over to me. “Oh no!”

TAGLISTS ARE OPEN/ ASK BOX IS OPEN/ REQUESTS ARE OPEN/ PLOT BUNNIES ARE WELCOMED

If you liked this, then please consider buying me a coffee HERE It only costs $3!!!

PETER STEELE TAGLIST

@rock-a-noodle

@ch3rry-c01a

[rndyounghowze]

What You Might Not Know About…

Jacques Ze Whipper

Jack Lepiarz or “Jaques Ze Whipper” or “Jack the Whipper” has been whipping it good for about fourteen years now. You may know him from his appearance on America’s Got Talent when he whipped a piece of straw from between Simon Cowell’s legs. You may also know him from his viral short videos where he sings parodies to songs like “All the Single Ladies” or the Animaniacs “Yakko’s World” song all while cracking the whip to keep time. However, there are some things about Jaques that you might not know about. We got to chat with him for a short while to bring you some trivia like…

Jack Comes From a Circus Family

“I grew up in the circus. We were with the Big Apple Circus until I was about 6 years old and then we did a bunch of Renaissance Faires when I was a kid. I have a weird parentage. My father is a circus performer (His father John Lepiarz currently “Mr. Fish” with the Super Scientific Circus) . My mother, now retired, was a college professor of anthropology with a doctorate in anthropology. She was very big on me getting a normal education so I kinda split time between normal school and the circus growing up.”

Jack Started On The Streets Of Boston

 “I went to Emerson College. I’m like ‘I have all these circus skills, why don’t I just try to do some street performing and see how that goes?’ It went as well as you would expect for someone who’s not very polished to go, which is that it went alright, there was nothing catastrophic, but it wasn’t great work. But it helped me kind of polish the act. Then I was like ‘well alright now I have this slightly more polished act let me do Renaissance Faires’ so I started working at King Richard’s Faire when I was twenty. 

Father’s Advice 

“My father, who had done the Renaissance Faire circuit for years, said ‘well what makes a good, successful Ren Faire act is the character and the comedy. You don’t have to be the most talented circus performer as long as you can make people laugh and keep them engaged and a character is a great way to do that.’ One of the things that we wanted to do is to make the whips less threatening. We kind of played around with the idea of being a goofy character and that didn’t quite translate. We decided to try being the French character because, you know, everyone at the Ren Faire is English, Irish,  Scottish. There aren’t a lot of French characters at the Renaissance Faire. We tried that for a couple of days and it went alright. Then the last day of my first weekend I drew on the mustache and it was like everything clicked. People understood this show is dumb and that it’s okay to laugh.”

Jaques Fans Are Why He’s On Tik Tok 

“[In 2021] a couple of longtime fans of mine came to my show, recorded bits of the show, put up 30-40 second clips of the show on Tik Tok and the first one got like three hundred thousand views, the second one got two million views and the third one got two point two million views. I was like ‘oh okay apparently there is a demand for Jaques Ze Whipper in the world that I had never known’. So I started on Tik Tok and from there it’s kinda been like, as I find I have the brain space to expand I expand to a new social media and so from there I went to Instagram and from there I went to Facebook and then Youtube.”

Digital Show 

“As my following has grown on social media there are these people who are like ‘come to the UK, come to Germany, come to Indonesia’. There’s no way for me right now to easily get to those places and even if I could get to those places the amount it would cost for me to get there would be prohibitive for a lot of people. So I said ‘why don’t I do this show where we can kinda do the best of my show and the secret show that I do with Ses Carny and by making it a digital show what we could do is get people from all over the world and that helps us keep the price point pretty low’. Ten bucks is still too expensive for some people that I’ve talked to but I think that it’s reachable for most people who are fans of mine. You could get four people to all pitch in $2.50 and just share one ticket. That’s fine. 

My plan is to do a show like this every year around this time for as long as WBUR will have me. We did a walk through in the theatre this week and they said they’re fully on board for another show next year and the year beyond that so I think my plan is: once a year do a digital show like this and assuming the interest is still there bring in other performers and kind of make it ‘Jacque’s Circus Hour’ and use it as a way to profile some of my wonderful colleagues who I think are just as if not more talented than me who just for some reason or another haven’t gone viral yet”.

The Physical Toll 

“A lot of people don’t understand quite how physical the show is and the amount of work that goes into making sure that my body is able to hold up under the stress of the show. The last couple of years I have been semi injured while performing and it’s been amazing how something as little as [spraining] my wrist in August of 2021 and the entire ‘21 season…there were certain tricks that I could not do without a lot of pain. Then this past season I tweaked something in my right shoulder just before the season started or early in the season and it never felt quite right until I had a chance to just rest it for a few weeks. (You can see this video where he sings a “Sound Of Silence” parody while remarking that his Physical Therapist would be mad because he wasn't cleared to whip with his right hand yet.)  I think that’s the biggest thing. The show is an athletic performance even as I’m just up there just cracking whips and singing songs. It is a workout.”

Get your tickets now! Virtual Ticket sales end at 5pm Eastern on Friday Jan. 27

[atypicalblogname]

I am done hiding. Jaque ze Whipper's cat is the cutest being alive.

Just look at that face. How can you not love him.

[godmodebeginswithlesbians]

lemme tell ya, jaques ze whipper has a very nice ass

[warborn-tragedy]

In case anyone's wondering, while I do have Nicholas Galitzine as Arnold's 'normal' face claim, his actual physique/body build is much closer to Jaques ze Whipper on youtube/tiktok

[necrobardvixen]

Finished making my pin the head on the minifigure for my daughter's bday . The heads are sleeping, pirate, cute girl, ninja, harry potter, vampire, jaques ze whipper, and kissy face

[amyrosegold]

Went to the Ren. Faire and saw this magestic being

[orgosia-blog]

Jaques Ze Whipper

[steele-soulmate]

Tattooed Wings, CHAPTER 364, Peter Steele & OFC, Soulmate AU

SUMMARY: Mary Claire Bradley meets her soulmate- literally- the famous Peter Steele of metal group Type O Negative. But will obstacles including trauma, stalkers, and toxic family members get in the way of their life?

WARNING: mentions of child rape (nothing graphic) PTSD, milk kink, soft smut, grinding, assault, fingering, hand jobs, blow jobs, 69, P in V sex, blood, noncon rape, blood, violence, death, vandalism, graffiti, attempted kidnapping, break-ins, wild animal attacks

WORDS: 1150

“Everybody,” sang James.

“YEAH!” screamed the crowd.

 “Sing with Jaques,” he said.

 “YEAH!” yelled everyone/

 “Everybody sing with Jaques Ze,” sang the retired circus performer.

 “It’s gonna be oui oui!” I called out from my spot at the side of the stage.

 “Jaques is back,” James broke off, to give the crowd their cue.

 “OUI OUI!” everyone yelled, knowing at once what they needed to say.

 “Bah bah bah bah bah bah bah bah bah bah,” scatted James before launching into the song at hand.

 “Ohmugawd it’s Jaques again

On the stage and I am whippin’

Gonna do it for you whip it now

I’ll whip Mary Claire oh boy how

Am I a good quipper?”

 “YEAH!” howled the audience.

 “Am I a French whipper?” he asked next.

 “YEAH!” cheered the crowd.

 “Am I a stripper?” was his next question.

 “YEAH!” screamed everyone, jumping up and down in their seats.

 “Am I everything you need

You better sing with Jaques now!

Everybody!” he ordered them all.

 “YEAH!” sang the crowd.

 “Sing with Jaques”

 “YEAH!” screamed the audience.

 “Everybody

Whip with Jaques Ze

Jaques is back…” James took a step back and was not disappointed.

 “OUI OUI!” The crowd broke out into loud cheers at the end.

 “Wee wee!” cheered little girl from her place in my husband’s arms.

 “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAW…” everyone exploded at the cuteness of little girl, tucked away safe and loved in her beloved godfather’s arm.

 “Hashtag little girl is an icon!” I announced with a grin.

 “My husband’s daughter, ladies and gentlemen!” James announced her as. “She was born on her mommy’s birthday!”

 “September fourth!” I confirmed. “Little diva wanted to make an entrance!”

 “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAW…” sighed everyone.

 Little girl let out a giggle as she kicked her legs, seemingly perfectly content in her beloved godfather’s arm, her happily napping brother in his other arm.

 “Alright now, back to the show at hand!” James announced, getting a chuckle out of everyone in attendance for the Jaques Ze Whipper show.

 “Alright, so for those of you who are new to the whip show- you’re doomed,” I bemoaned into my headset microphone, getting laughter out of everyone. “But basically what happens is that the audience will select a song at random and then Jaques can either play it or roast whoever requested it.”

 “A few rules to go over first though audience!” James cut in. “Rule number one- Mary Claire and I are not available romantically- we’re both married.”

 “Not to each other though!” I laughed.

 “Rule number two- the Jaques Ze Whipper whip show is a PG13 show,” he stressed.

 “PG13,” I repeated.

 “Parents, this is a PG13 show,” James repeated in a dead serious tone of voice.

 “PG13,” I chorused after him.

 “Parents.” James adopted a serious look on his face. “If you don’t want your kids hearing words such as-”

 “Shit!” I called out.

 “TOO LATE!” we both yelled.

 “And also, one last note about the whip show before we continue on,” Jaques warned the audience. “So, we want to be very clear, parents, if you’re thinking it’s been okay, a little bit raunchy, but okay, believe me when I say it’s going to get so much worst. And you know why it’s going to get worst? It’s because I’m French.”

 “You know, you’d think after all the years you’ve been doing this being ‘French’ and all, your accent would’ve gotten a lot better,” I dryly pointed out, getting a wide collection of sounds in response.

 “Alright, alright, look, look,” James took center stage once more, switching into his outlandish French accent once more. “I can do a proper French accent, but the problem with the French accent is that the people have a hard time understanding you, and the problem is that the audience, they need to focus on what you’re saying, okay? And this is a problem because when the audience needs to focus, they cause all kind of problems. I don’t want the audience to have to focus, you understand?” He turned to me, and I corrected his pronunciation of the word focus with a straight face.

 “In fact, you need to focus!” he scowled at me before he turned back to the audience, walking into the crowd of people sitting and enjoying the show. “I saw the queen the other day and I go ‘Oh, your highness is so beautiful today’ and she got upset. I don’t understand why the queen got upset! And that is the problem, people need to see the joy in life, I want you all to find happiness!”

 I saw my handsome older husband roaring rigorous at the overexaggerated mispronouncing of focus and happiness, turning the simple words into fucking and have a penis.

 “Alright now audience, now is the moment that you all have been waiting for! Yell out your song suggestions!” I yelled out.

 “Sweet Caroline!”

 “Baby Got Back!”

 “Chrissy Wake Up!”

 “I Swear Boyz II Men!”

 “Let it Go!”

 “Firebird!”

 “Alright Baby Got Back for our first song!” James announced before beginning to whip out a fast beat.

 “Let’s go!” I whooped.

 “I like big whips

And I cannot lie

You other whippers can’t deny

When a dude walks in

With an itty bitty ‘stache

And a big crack on your ass

You get stung

Acting like your tough

Because you noticed

That whip was rough

Look at the whip I’m cracking

You know that I won’t be cracking

Oh Mary Claire

I wanna get with ya

And then I’ll whip ya

My wenches tried to warn me

Cause you know that my rhymes are just so corny”

 “Thank you, thank you,” Jaques grinned. “Fun fact- I actually wrote that entire thing while I was in the shower one day when I first started doing musical whips and I was like oh my GAAAAAAAAAAAWD this is so good… also I got soap in my eyes, Goddamnit!”

  Oui, yes, French

 TAGLISTS ARE OPEN/ ASK BOX IS OPEN/ REQUESTS ARE OPEN/ PLOT BUNNIES ARE WELCOMED

 If you liked this, then please consider buying me a coffee HERE It only costs $3!!!

 PETER STEELE TAGLIST

@starchild0985​