#Kristen and gods as adults with duty of care

[halloweeneva]

You die. You’re a child and you die and your God walks away when you ask him why.  You’re fourteen and scared. You’re dead and no one saved you.  This wasn’t supposed to happen to you. Your God promised to protect you. He promised. He didn’t. You get to come back and it is in spite of him. The rules are broken and maybe so are you. You don’t know what to do when all of your faith has been misplaced and the one person who was always always supposed to protect you didn’t. You are a creature of faith and you don’t know how to trust anymore. You fight and you bleed and you’re not alone but you can’t go home.  

The only people who care enough about you to try and save you are also children. You’re all children and you’re dying. The only thing you can do is try. You do. You drag yourself up. Kicking and screaming and clinging by your fingertips. You are broken and bloody and bruised but you are alive and you save yourself. 

You try to start over. You invent a new god. Try to brandish it like a shield but some part of you is still fourteen and small and dead on a cafeteria floor.  Your parents don’t want you anymore. You loved them. You love them. You don’t know how to talk to them. They loved the version of you that died surrounded by strangers. Some part of you is sorry that you didn’t die. That you changed instead.  Maybe you came back wrong. 

You don’t know if your parents would care if you died again. 

You die again. 

You tried so hard and it isn’t fair. You spoke to the universe and it spoke back and it still isn’t enough. You don’t know how to trust anyone to protect you. Every time you try you see your own broken body on the floor.

The place inside you that is supposed to hold your faith has cracked and broken and the sting of betrayal still smarts when you try to touch it.

You die and find God broken and dead and sobbing on the floor. She looks just like you. She is a little too much like you. You reach out to her and she is angry and betrayed and so so familiar. She kills you. You are sixteen and dead. She can’t save you. Maybe you can save her. You come back. Kicking and screaming and crying you drag both of you back to life.

It’s hard. She doesn’t know how to be a god. You don’t know how to be a cleric. You’re both trying. You have to hope it will be enough. You look at her and see yourself and sometimes you can’t fucking stand it. You love her. You need her. She is so fragile you’re fourteen sixteen and can barely hold yourself together let alone somebody else. You don’t have a choice. You need each other. It has to be enough. 

She dies and it’s your fault.

[thehelleniclunarwitch]

His Darkest Obsession:04

Pairing: Edward Nygma x Reader

Fandom: Gotham, Batman, DC

Warning: Language, Violence, Mental Abuse

One     Two     Three  

Bruce and Selina watched you nervously pace back and forth in Bruce’s study. Selina glanced over at Bruce.

“What do we do?” Selina mouthed.Bruce only shrugged he wasn’t sure if he should say something or let you take your time.

“Y/n, what’s wrong?” Selina finally broke the silence.

You turned towards your friends.

“I don’t think it’s a secret admirer I have. I think it’s a stalker,” You told them.

“Why do you say that?” Bruce asked.

“The boys at school get me in trouble that same night they’re murdered. My backpack gets stolen and the man, who I didn’t even get a look at, by the way, shows up at the police station with my bag in tow, and now this whole thing Cal it only makes sense,” You said.

“What thing with Cal?” Bruce asked.

“Remember he was that officer that was in that really bad car accident,” Selina pointed out.

“Why would he have anything to do with your stalker?” Bruce asked.

You looked over at Selina and she gave you a look. You let out a long sigh.

“Cal and I were kind of seeing each other,” You admitted.

“You were dating an adult?” Bruce asked.

“Okay, you’re acting like I’m some child. I’m seventeen, eighteen in three months, plus Cal is only twenty-one,” You explained.

“Yeah, Bruce it’s not like Y/n is dating a forty-year-old,” Selina added.

“And, Jim, your brother, who is a police detective is okay with that?” Bruce asked.

“He knows and somewhat approves. I mean the dude is a cop, so Jim has his eyes on him at all times,” You replied.

“Okay, so say we go with this that your admirer is actually you’re stalker what do we do?” Selina asked.

“We need to try and figure out who it could possibly be,” Bruce said.

“Well, we know it’s not anybody at school. Nobody wants to date the sister of a police detective,” You pointed out.

“True, but we can’t rule anybody out. If we think it’s a stalker they could be trying to use you to get to Jim,” Selina said.

“I’ll ask around the school and see what I can manage to get out of them,” Bruce said.

“Does Cal have any idea who would have cut his brakes?” Selina asked.

You shook your head.

“Unfortunately, no,” You replied.

“How is he doing?” Bruce asked.

“Thankfully, nothing major, just a broken an arm and some cuts and bruises,” You answered.

Your phone chirped.

“I gotta go. I’m meeting Jim at the station before we go up to see Cal,” You said.

“Don’t worry Y/n we’re going to figure this out,” Bruce said.

You hugged your friends before excusing yourself. When you were gone Selina turned to Bruce.

“Who could be doing this to her? What do they have to gain by taking it out on her?” Selina asked.

“I don’t know Selina but we’re going to find out who it is and bring them to justice,” Bruce growled as he bunched his fist.

“Come on, come on, please,” You begged as you bounced up and down next to your brother.

Jim sighed.

“Jim, I never ever ask for anything,” You pleaded.

“What’s the princess begging for now?” Harvey asked as he came to sit on the desk next to you.

“Mr. Johnson who lives on the floor below has a litter of puppies up for adoption,” You began.

“Oh come on Jim, you gotta get the kid a puppy,” Harvey said.

Jim glared at Harvey. “You can stay out of it,”

“Jim, I get good grades, I play a sport, I do my own chores, I have a part-time job. I am the definition of a responsible teen,” You explained to him.

Jim looked over at you. You and Harvey gave him the most sorrowful puppy dog eyes. He sighed.

“You will be the one who will need to train him, pay for all of his vet dates, and everything else,” Jim said.

You cheered as Harvey high fived you.

“Okay, let me go finish up some paperwork and then we’ll get out of here,” Jim said.

Jim and Harvey went their separate ways. You slid off the desk to head to Lee’s office. You hadn’t seen her so you weren’t even sure if she was still at work. When you got to her office the door was closed, you knocked once before entering. Lee was nowhere to be seen. Sighing, you turned to head back to the main part of the station. Gasping, you gently pushed Edward away from you.

“You scared the shit out of me,” You hissed.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you,” Edward apologized.

“Jeez, Eddie, you really need to wear a bell or something,” You teased.

Edward only smiled.

“I haven’t seen you around the station lately,” Edward pointed out.

“Yeah, between school and soccer, I’ve been pretty busy,” You replied.

“And also the visits to the hospital right?” Edward asked.

Your furrowed your eyebrows. “How did you know about the hospital trips?”

“Silly girl, Jim mentioned to me how the two of you have been spending a lot of time at the hospital with Mr. O’Brian,” Edward explained.

“Oh, right, well Eddie, how have you been?” You asked.

“Still heartbroken, they can’t find Kristen,” Eddie said.

“I hope that they can find her. You two had just started dating, right?” You asked.

Edward nodded slowly. “Yeah, I still think her ex had something to do with it,”

“What? God that’s awful, I hope he didn’t do anything to her,” You said.

“Probably just ran away together,” Edward said.

You looked up at him. “Why would Krissy just run away without saying anything? That seems so unlike her,”

“How would you know what she’s like?” Edward snapped.

You nervously took a step away from him.

“I just mean, from the little bit we talked, I couldn’t see Kristen taking off like that, that’s all,” You explained.

Edward could see how uncomfortable you were.

“My apologies, I didn’t mean to snap, I,” But Edward was cut off.

“Hey, there you are, we better go see Cal before we pick up the pup,” Jim said.

You nodded.

“Bye Mr. Nygma,” You said before running over to join your brother.

Edward wanted to shout at you to call him Edward, but he knew he had scared you. The way you flinched away from him really ticked him off. He didn’t want you to be afraid of him. He wanted you to love him. Edward was going to have to slow down and rethink a few things. Maybe he was rushing things with you because he wanted you so badly, but it was obvious that you weren’t there yet.

With Cal O’Brian still in the picture, Edward knew that he didn’t have a chance with you. Edward couldn't fathom on why you would want to be with Cal anyway, but he’d take a few steps back and maybe up his gift game. You hadn’t put the clues together yet, which was okay, that gave Edward more time to woo you.

Smiling, Ed turned on his heels and stormed away as another brilliant idea popped up in his head. He just knew the perfect gift for you!

After a trip to the hospital, you and Jim returned home. You stopped by Mr. Johnson’s place so you could put your name down for a pup. It would still be another two weeks before the puppies would be ready. You couldn’t wait to have one of them as your own. Ever since moving to Gotham you had wanted a pet so you were very pleased that Jim had finally broken down. You were going to have to get Harvey a thank you gift because you knew that he had been working on your brother about easing up on you and letting you get a pet.

Jim had just unlocked the penthouse door when his phone rang. You took the bag of take-out food so Jim could answer his phone.

“What’s up Harvey?” Jim asked.

He looked at you.

“Yeah, no worries, I’ll be back in a few,” Jim said.

You sighed.

“You really have to go?” You asked him.

“Sorry, kiddo, duty calls,” Jim said.

“Okay, I’ll save you some orange chicken,” You said.

Jim kissed your cheek before hurrying back down the stairs. You pushed open the door entering the penthouse you were greeted by Barbara. She sat on the long couch with a glass of wine in her hands.

“Where’s your brother?” She asked coldly.

“Harvey called, he had to go back to the station,” You answered.

Barbara watched as you placed the bag of Chinese food on the table. When you lifted your other bag, Barbara quickly stood.

“Why did you two stop at the pet store?” Barbara demanded to know.

“Jim is letting me adopt one of Mr. Johnson’s puppies,” You told her.

Barbara stormed over to you, snatched the bag out of your hand before going through it.

“I cannot believe your brother is letting you adopt a dog,” She growled.

“I am more than responsible,” You began.

Barbara slapped you. “I don’t care if you’re responsible or not! I’ve been asking for a year to get a pet, but Jim always said no because we’re too busy, but of course when his precious little sister wants something she gets it,”

You held your stinging cheek.

“God take up your problems with my brother with my brother,” You snarled.

Barbara slapped your other cheek. You recovered and straighten your back. As Barbara stared at her hand in the realization of what she had done she quickly looked up at you.

“Oh, Y/n, I’m so sorry,” Barbara began to apologize but you ran away from her.

“Y/n!” Barbara shouted.

As you ran to the front door you snatched up your backpack on the way out. Barbara was still shouting at you as she ran after you. You ran all the way down the stairs and out of the apartment building. You hurried off to the side in case Barbara came looking for you she wouldn’t be able to see you.

With shaky hands, you pulled your phone out of your backpack. Bruce would already be in bed and you couldn’t call Jim at work, and who the hell knows if Selina would even answer or if she’d have minutes on her phone. Knowing that you couldn’t go back into that apartment without Jim you only had one last person to call.

Putting the phone up to your ear you waited impatiently for him to answer.

“Y/n?” He answered on the final ring.

You held back the urge to cry.

“Eddie, can you come get me?” You asked.

This was his chance.

“Where are you?” Edward asked.

“On the side of the apartment building currently hiding from Barbara,” You told him.

“Stay there, I’m coming for you,” Edward said before hanging up.

Pulling your jacket a little closer you leaned up against the building. Ten minutes went by when a familiar car pulled up to the curb. As you moved to round the corner, Edward jumped out of his car and hurried over to you. As the two of you neared each other he grabbed your face. You knew that your cheeks were still red from when she slapped you as your cheeks were still stinging.

“Did she do this to you?” Edward demanded to know.

You slowly nodded.

“I’ll go talk to her,” Edward hissed.

As he turned to leave you grabbed his arm.

“Please don’t,” You pleaded with him.

Edward watched a few tears slip down your cheeks. He pulled you in close before leading you over to his car. Once you were tucked away safely in his car, Edward looked up to the floor your penthouse was located and right then and there he swore his vengeance against Barbara Kean. His lip curled up in disgust. Nobody would ever hurt you again, Edward swore to burn down all of Gotham to keep you safe.

If only you had known that you just sealed your fate with the devil himself.