#LESS THAN 12 HOURS HOW WE DOIN TEAM?????????

[ineffablebrainrot]

HAVE Y’ALL SEEN THIS ??????? HOW HAVE I NOT SEEN ANYONE TALK ABOUT THIS YET?????

edit: oops thought i edited out the bit where i scrolled up to restart the vid OH WELL

[lallyloo]

The Ball Pit

(Note: the ball pit idea came from @fanbabble and many of the images and words in this fic came directly from her. I just fleshed it out into a story and added an ending!)

When his third period teacher mentioned the school carnival and said shifts were mandatory, Rhett was quick to sign up for the ball pit.

He was still the new kid at school, and while he was on the basketball team he wasn’t friends with the other guys. He was too tall, even for basketball, and gangly and awkward. He made the team because he was good at 3-pointers and his teammates made him well aware of that fact. He wasn’t one of them. He wasn’t part of the post-game camaraderie. After their games, he usually just stayed in one corner of the locker room turned away from everyone, changed quickly, and escaped.

Taking part in the school carnival where he’d have to interact with his fellow classmates wasn’t something Rhett was keen to do. The ball pit was for kids under 12, so Rhett figured it would mostly involve interacting with little kids and maybe a few parents, and there would be less of a chance that he’d have to talk to other students.

He was pleased when he arrived at the makeshift pit on Saturday afternoon and found it tucked away between the haunted house and the raffle table. It suited him just fine to be stuck in the back somewhere, almost forgotten. He had to take tickets and help little kids get in and out of the ball pit. Simple.

About an hour into his shift, just as he was helping a little girl find her shoe, he heard “McLaughlin!” and a second later a plastic ball pinged off the side of his head. It didn’t hurt exactly, but it immediately set Rhett on edge.

He was pretty sure he knew the voice and he turned to look. Yep. It was exactly who he expected to see. The guy’s name was Link, and Rhett wasn’t sure if it was a nickname or his actual name, and it might have been cute if Link wasn’t currently pinging plastic balls off Rhett’s forehead.

*PING*

Link grinned at him, and Rhett did his best to ignore him.

Link was popular, and on the school soccer team, but Rhett knew him from the basketball games. He was always showing up with his teammates and cheering on the basketball team while goofing off in the stands. Rhett could appreciate the school spirit, but he wasn’t entirely sure if he appreciated the way they all yelled “McLaughlin!” whenever he scored. It somehow felt more mocking than supportive.

Link had grabbed several balls from the pit, likely when Rhett was occupied helping the little girl, and Link cradled the balls in his arms as he leaned against the raffle table.

Link was still grinning. “How you doin’ McLaughlin?”

“I’m good–”

*PING*

Another ball hit Rhett in the forehead as he spoke.

Rhett sighed and turned his back to Link, focusing on the ball pit.

*PING*

A ball hit his back.

*PING*

Another bounced off the back of his head.

Rhett just stood there, silent, and another couple balls flew by him as Link’s aim seemed to falter a bit.

Then suddenly Link was near him, just off to the right, grabbing a few more balls from the pit.

Rhett frowned but refused to look over at him as he warned, “You should leave those in there.”

“There’s lots,” Link replied, tossing one Rhett’s way and dinging it off his elbow. “I just need a couple.”

“That’s more than a couple.”

Link disappeared and it was only a second or two before a ball hit Rhett again.

*PING*

*PING*

“Hey McLaughlin, you should turn around.”

Rhett sighed and turned back around to face him. “My name’s Rhett.”

“Yeah,” Link grinned, “Rhett McLaughlin, I know.”

He wound up and dinged a ball right off Rhett’s forehead.

“Don’t you have somewhere to be?”

“Yep, the cotton candy booth.”

*PING*

“So why aren’t you there?”

“There’s too much sticky sugar fluff,” Link explained, tossing another ball and missing Rhett completely. “I didn’t wanna get it on me.”

“They probably need your help.”

Link retrieved a few more balls from the pit. “I’m helping here.”

*PING*

“You’re not helping at all.”

Link did a spin, looking back over his shoulder and tossing a ball behind him. It hit Rhett directly in the face.

“Look at that! I should play basketball!”

Rhett rolled his eyes and turned his attention back to the ball bit. He’d signed up to help little kids, not to be bullied by an idiotic pest with a stupid name.

He managed to ignore Link for a little while. Rhett focused on talking to parents, keeping track of the ball pit times, and helping kids climb in and out. But Link remained on the periphery, always waiting until Rhett was done talking and then dinging him in the head, back, shoulders, chest, wherever he could get a good shot in at the time.

Rhett could feel his ire rising as Link continued to taunt him, making stupid little comments as if he wanted Rhett to laugh or get mad or SOMETHING. It was like Link was trying to provoke a reaction, and Rhett did his best not to give it to him.

*PING*

*PING*

Rhett had just refereed a fight in the ball pit and was climbing out when another ball dinged him hard on the forehead. He wasn’t sure if Link’s throws were getting more forceful, or if his skin was just growing sensitive after being hit with so many plastic balls. Either way, it hurt.

“Ow dude!”

“Oh sorry, did I hurt ya?”

Link moved quickly, almost bouncing up to Rhett, and he kissed his fingertips and smacked them against Rhett’s forehead as if he was making it better.

Rhett just stared at him in surprise, but Link was already moving away and he was still grinning that maddening grin.

“You alright?”

“I– ”

*PING*

Something snapped inside Rhett. He took a quick look around and then grabbed Link by the shoulders and pushed him behind the ball pit, up against the back of the haunted house.

Link just stared up at Rhett with the strangest little smirk on his mouth, his eyebrows raised as if in surprise.

Rhett stared him down. “Why are you messing with me?!”

Instead of replying, Link went up on his tiptoes and kissed him. It was so quick, just a smack on the lips and then Link pulled back to see Rhett’s reaction.

Rhett looked at him in disbelief for a second and then found himself leaning in and kissing back.

Link’s lips were soft, and he tasted sweet like he’d been at the funnel cake booth, and he was moving frantically against Rhett’s mouth. He was like a live wire, full of energy, and when Rhett attempted to grab his hips and just hold him still because damn it Rhett needed to kiss him, Link just kept moving, sucking at Rhett’s neck, his breath coming quick and hot against Rhett’s skin.

He seemed almost wild with excitement so Rhett moved his mouth down and gave Link’s neck a suck, trying to get him to just calm down, but it seemed to have the opposite effect. Link stayed in motion, grabbing, running his hands over Rhett’s buzz cut and then pulling Rhett’s face back up to his own and kissing him again, kissing kissing kissing until they were both breathless.

Finally some sense came over Rhett and he pulled back a bit.

“Why were you throwin’ balls at me?”

Link shrugged, still grinning, his hands still on Rhett’s face, “I just wanted your attention.”

“There are better ways to get my attention.”

“Well it worked, didn’t it?”

Rhett was speechless at his brazenness.

“Didn’t it?” Link repeated.

“I gotta get back to my shift,” Rhett stammered.

“Can we do something after?”

“If you stop throwin’ shit at me.”

“I’ll stop,” Link grinned, “if you take me for a sno-cone when you’re done.”

Rhett sighed, but he was smiling. “Fine.”

“And you come in the haunted house with me.”

“Okay.”

“Good,” Link said. “Hurry up with your shift. I’ll get us tickets.”

“I can’t just leave.” Rhett pointed to the back of the ball pit, “I have to be here until six.”

“Fine,” Link sighed dramatically, and he was already moving away, walking backwards and pointing at Rhett as he went. “Sno-cones at six then, right?”

“Yes.” Rhett replied, and then Link was off somewhere, out of sight.

Rhett took a second to straighten his shirt and then he stepped back to the ball pit.

Okay, so maybe Link wasn’t a stupid name after all. It was actually kind of cute.

Sequel: The Sno-Cone Date

[inkribbon796]

The Marvelous Misadventures of One: S. Marvin Argentum Ch. 1: To County Kerry and Back Again

Summary: Marvin goes to clear his head, and gets caught up in a huge conspiracy in the process.

A/N: *side eyes at the recent Techno and Quackity lore* I saw it, and I’ll address that loaded but fun character development it another time. I don’t have Dream in jail . . . yet, maybe . . . so fortunately so I don’t have to adhere/spoil it too closely.

Chapters: 1, 2, 3, 4

Marvin relaxed a bit, as much as he could, into the train seat he was in. His train was traveling from Althone down to his mom’s home in Kelly’s Bay, Ireland.

He’d lost his mask and cape long before he got to the train, and he felt very exposed and uneasy without them. The long scars down his face on display for all to see. But he was going to distance himself from everything that had happened recently.

Fortunately he had nine hours to nap and think. His phone was silenced, except for emergency calls. This would be the start of a time for meditation and reflection.

And it was, for about two hours.

“Marvin?”

The mage did everything in his power not to jump or startle. But when he looked over to see Ghostbur materialize right next to him, he just about launched himself out of his own seat.

“Fook!”[1] Marvin cursed.

“Oh sorry,” Ghostbur held up his hands in apology. “I didn’t mean to startle you, I just wasn’t sure it was you at first without your mask.”

“How the fook[1] did yeh[2] find me?” Marvin hissed, trying to keep his voice down.

“Well I followed you and Average to the station,” Ghost admitted. “You looked really sad and lonely, so I figured I should keep you company.”

“Ghostbur,” Marvin tried to keep his voice down and his anger obviously. “I’m tryin’ ta get away from the heroes. Not brin’ it with me.”[3]

“Yes, you mentioned that, but I just wanted to keep you company,” Ghostbur told him. “Toms was lonely when he was sent off and I didn’t want you to be lonely.”

Marvin was about to snap back that being lonely with his thoughts was the whole point, but at the mention of Tommy, or “Big Man”, and about some more pieces of what had to have been a very tough period in Tommy’s life he decided not to.

“Yeh sure Tommy won’t mind yeh bein’ here with me instead ‘a with him?”[4] Marvin asked.

Ghostbur looked at him hands, “Tommy has Tubbo and Ranboo and . . . Tommy likes them more.”

Feeling like that hit him a bit too personally, Marvin sighed. “Fine, yeh[2] can come with, just make sure yeh[2] don’t tell people who I am.”

Smiling, Ghostbur perked right up, “I won’t, I won’t, I promise.”

Ghostbur more or less kept his word. He meandered up and down the train and they reached County Kerry. Ghostbur was enthralled by the nearby sheep fields. He would lean over the fence and feed them. His sheep companion field often trotted by his side. The farmers and dogs weren’t too keen on him, but the sheep seemed to adore Ghostbur.

One rental car later, Marvin slipped into a petrol station to grab some snacks. No one seemed to recognize him anymore, which Marvin was eternally grateful for.

The ghostly young man was floating next to Marvin as he was in the back grabbing some drinks. He was floating upside-down.

“Mar— uhh, mage I don’t know, uhm,” Ghostbur immediately corrected himself.

“What?” Marvin sighed, closing the fridge door a bit harsher than he needed to. “An’[5] Marv is fine.”

“One of the demon hunters is here,” Ghostbur whispered, hunching in on himself to make himself smaller.

“From Egoton?” Marvin tried to look around the shelf and saw someone in a dark cloak talking to the person behind the register.

“Fook,”[1] Marvin magicked his mask into his hands and put it on. “I’m supposed ta[6] be on leave, stay back here and[5] stay down.”

“Okay,” Ghostbur nodded nervously.

Marvin braced to start casting spells as he walked out. “Well, this is a shite meetin’. The fook yeh doin’ so far from home?”[7]

The hunter turned and pulled down their hood, revealing themself to be the Grandmaster’s second-in-command, “I thought I detected your aura close by.”

“Why don’t we take this outside?” Marvin snarled. “Leave the nice human out ‘a[8] this?”

“Of course, of course,” Taylor promised, and began to back out. Marvin rushed to pay for his things and handed the bags to Ghostbur, who was ordered to stay back in the shop as Marvin stepped out. People were definitely starting to recognize who he was now.

“Yeh need ta turn back around an’ head back o’er ta Egoton, before this fight gets nasty,”[9] Marvin warned. “Not on the clock, supposed ta[6] be headed back home.”

“I would have left you be, but I need help,” the hunter said.

“That’s what the rest ‘a yer Guild is fer,”[10] Marvin spat.

“The Guildmaster is planning another attack on Egoton, but she’s got help,” Taylor told him quickly. “I’ve tried everything to stop her, but she’s only doubling down, all she cares about is killing demons.”

“Why haven’t yeh[2] told the other heroes?” Marvin demanded.

“Are you kidding me?” They spat. “Spade would kill me. Besides, the Host didn’t let me even get close. I’m being watched by the Guildmaster’s favorite hunters. I only just managed to lose them.”

“What are they gonna[11] do?” Marvin demanded.

“The Guildmaster has been talking with the CIA and some showboat freak that’s got a vendetta against the Entity. He passed all the tests as a human but there’s no way that thing is human.” Taylor wasn’t meeting his eyes and they looked pissed. “I think his name is Mark or Marcus.”

Something triggered in the back of Marvin’s memory. He wasn’t sure if he’d heard something in passing but he could have sworn he knew what person the hunter was talking about, but his mind couldn’t conjure a message.

Either way, the demon hunters team with a dangerous personal enemy of Dark’s and the government was a bad idea.

“Shit!” Taylor spat, looking back and pulling out a staff from their robe. “No!”

Marvin looked around, expecting to see more Hunter walking over to him, but he only saw Ghostbur fall out of the little convenience store’s door. He was desperately trying to be discreet and failing.

“Wait, he’s with me,” Marvin got in between the hunter and Ghostbur, readying his cards to defend him.

“With you?” Taylor balked. “Are you insane? Do you know who that is?”

“I work with a guy who’s sleepin’[12] with a mob boss behind my back, an’[5] a demon kid who talks ta[6] squirrels.” Marvin could already feel his blood pressure rising again. “Don’t talk ta me about knowin’ who people are, ‘cause I don’t, an’ I think you do either.”[13]

Ghostbur began getting close but was clearly nervous. Marvin looked at the people watching them and Marvin decided, “Maybe we should get outta[14] here.”

Taylor looked around and threw down a smoke bomb, letting Marvin get into the rental car with Ghostbur and the hunter and driving away, which was immediately tense because Ghostbur was obviously nervous. She was sitting in the back of the car.

Ghostbur was turned around his his seat, looking sadly at her, “I’m sorry if old me ever hurt you in the past. I can’t remember if we’ve ever met.”

“What are you playing at?” The hunter snapped.

“I’ve had really bad memory since I discorporated,” Ghostbur ducked behind the chair. “I know I was a terrible person but I don’t remember you.”

“We never met,” Taylor told him and Ghostbur visibly calmed down.

“Oh, that’s a relief,” Ghostbur sighed and turned around. “Have you met Friend? He’s quite lovely.”

“Don’t summon yer[15] sheep inta[16] my car,” Marvin told her, he knew he shouldn’t be driving to his Mom’s house but he knew that if he didn’t visit her after telling her he was coming back to town and didn’t visit her he would be in trouble. She would find him and that was the last thing he wanted. Besides, he could probably keep the hunter in the car. He glanced at the hunter in the rearview mirror. “So yeh’ve ne’er met Ghostbur, but yeh know who he is?”[17]

“Their entire pact has titles,” Taylor told him. “Philza the Angel of Death, Techno the Blade, Lady Death, Wilbur the Sootling, and Tommy the Child Soldier.”

Marvin thought back to Tommy, laughing and joking around with Ethan and Tubbo. He’d seen Phil and Techno, knew they were dangerous, but he could only imagine the kinds of things Tommy had been through before meeting him in an almost empty sheep field with Ghostbur.

“I’m Ghostbur,” Ghostbur corrected, trying to hide behind the seat again. “Wilbur is dead.”

“Is that so?” The hunter demanded. “Why would the Angel of Death allow that?”

Ghostbur fell quiet, and Marvin verbally moved in to save him. “Hey, I’m gonna[11] call the heroes before I lose all my service out in the middle ‘a[8] fookin’[18] nowhere.”

Before the hunter could argue, Marvin was already speed dialing Chase.

  It took a couple rings before Chase actually picked up and Marvin could tell there was someone else talking to him but over the hum of the car on the road there was no way to tell if it was Dark or Jackie.

“Yeh[2] good?” Chase asked.

“Wish I was,” Marvin told him. “The demon hunters are plannin’[19] an attack on the city next week.”

“What?” Chase demanded in shock and someone on the other line was talking to Chase. “Is it on Friday?”

Shit! Marvin thought and his eyes darted back at Taylor and his knuckles went white on the steering wheel. “Is it on Friday?”

“Yeah, why?” Taylor asked.

“Shite, that’s the wedding,” Marvin hissed, then shouted back at the phone, “Yes!”

“Fook!”[1] Chase spat. Then Chase leaned away from the phone. “The fook yeh wanna do?”[20]

More muffled speaking followed.

“That . . .” Chase cut off, leaving Marvin unsure if he stopped talking or Marvin just couldn’t hear his rebuttal. But it let Marvin narrow down who Chase was probably with and talking to. “Look, Marv, I’ll call yeh back later. Gotta talk ta Dark about this.”[21]

“Yeah, that makes sense,” Marvin said, “take care ‘a yerself, ‘kay?”[22]

“Yeah,” Chase hung up, leaving the car in silence.

“What happens on Friday?” Taylor leaned forward closer to the driver’s seat.

“There’s a wedding, one ‘a Dark’s sons an’ one ‘a our aged out apprentices is gettin’ married next week, an’ this is too coincidental,”[23] Marvin explained.

“Is that what the event is?” Taylor realized. “We were told there was some big festival or gathering.”

“Nothing bad ever happens at a festival,” Ghostbur mumbled blankly, as if recalling some past, bad memory.

“Okay, okay, we’re comin’ up ta my stop, I gotta talk ta someone an’ then we can come up with a plan,”[24] Marvin told his passengers.

“Alright,” the hunter seemed to calm down.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Accessibility Translations:

1. Fuck

2. you

3. I’m trying to get away from the heroes. Not bring it with me.

4. You sure Tommy won’t mind you being here with me instead of with him?

5. And

6. to

7. Well, this is a shit meeting. The fuck are you doing so far from home?

8. of

9. You need to turn back around and head back over to Egoton, before this fight gets nasty

10. That’s what the rest of your Guild is for,

11. going to

12. sleeping

13. Don’t talk to me about knowing who people are, because I don’t, and I think you do either.

14. out of

15. your

16. into

17. So you’ve never met Ghostbur, but you know who he is?

18. fucking

19. planning

20. The fuck you want to do?

21. Look, Marv, I’ll call you back later. Got to talk to Dark about this.

22. take care of yourself, okay?

23. There’s a wedding, one of Dark’s sons and one of our graduated apprentices is getting married next week, and this is too coincidental

24. Okay, okay, we’re coming up to my stop, I have talk ta someone and then we can come up with a plan

[followthru4]

The Newcrest Titans secured a strong win versus the Windenburg Falcons, 104-90. Rhys was the Titans leading scorer with 27 points, 12 rebounds, and 4 assists. His best friend, Orlando, finished the game with 20 points, 6 rebounds, and 6 assists. The team now sat with a record of 12 wins and 0 losses, making them first place in their division and conference. With only 4 games left on the season, they were the talk around town as the favorite to win the championship. Following the game, Coach  Amador lectured his guys on remaining poised during the season.

Coach Amador: “Fellas, great team win tonight. Everyone brought their A game and it showed! I asked for us to be humble and we did. Thank You. Now I know its a Friday night, however please head straight to your dorms and stay in. I do not want any of our players running the streets. We’ll have practice bright and early tomorrow at 7am. Do not be late.”

“Yes Coach!” The team proclaimed in unison.

                                                    ****(music)****

Walking through the hall with his Beats headphones blasting Rexx Life Raj, Rhys was in an upbeat mood following his good game and team’s win. It was always a great night after defeating the opposition so easily like his squad had done a few hours ago. Had it been a lost, his mood would be the complete opposite. Replaying his points scored, and coach’s advice in his head, he spots Orlando and Emmett in the hallway.

Rhys (in his head): Why are they both wearing our team jackets?

Orlando: “So that’s why we should just step bro.”

Emmett: “I don’t know man, coach said it’s lock down tonight.”

Orlando: “Ahh, come on! Don’t be a L seven on me tonight.” He said as he noticed Rhys coming down the hall. “Aye, yo Rhys!”

Rhys: “What’s up ya’ll. You two dating now or something? What’s up with the matching attire?” He asked with a chuckle.

Emmett: “This genius is up to another one of his master plans.” He said fingering quotations as he said master plans.

Rhys: “Oh yeah, what is it this time fam?”

Orlando: “Glad you asked.” He said with a smirk. “Join us, tonight we’re going to a penthouse party in San My.”

Rhys: “What?! Fool you’re crazy. San My is a solid hour, hour and a half away. Besides, coach said it’s lock down tonight.”

Emmett: “See, that’s what I said!”

Orlando: “Ya’ll some squares all of a sudden? Look, we just destroyed Windenburg, and its Friday night. Live a little fellas. Besides, we’ll be back in time for practice, so it doesn’t matter. Let’s go! The more time we spend standing here, the less time we got in the city.”

Emmett followed Orlando’s lead while Rhys stood in the hallway contemplating his best friend’s words. He knew it was absolutely not the brightest idea to go to the city after his coach ordered the team to stay put in their dorms, however he definitely didn’t want word getting around that he was some nerd or square dude who passed up on lit parties in the city. Rhys took a deep breath, as if it were his last, and proceeded to his dorm to change his attire.

                                                    ****(music)****

It took the guys exactly 45 minutes to get to San My. Emmett drove a 2014 Ford Mustang and showed off his GTS engine, going on average 92 miles per hour the entire way there. It was shocking not a single cop noticed the speeds in which Emmett raced down the highway. Rhys was exuberant to be out of the car, as he felt he might not make it to the city alive. Orlando on the other hand loved it. He always was one to enjoy adrenaline rushes and living life on the edge. He blasted hip-hop music the whole ride, yelling every lyric like the songs were written by him. It reminded Rhys how he became friends with Orlando in the first place. He, simply put, just didn’t give a fuck about anything or anyone. Rhys often wished he had that kind of spirit, however his best friend gave him the balance he was desiring in that.

Once inside the penthouse the guys made their way downstairs to the party. It was a large pool area with dark lighting and scenic views of the city lights. Neither of them had ever seen the city this close and personal before. They instantly felt like kings. As they headed in the direction of the DJ booth they found a couch area and decided to park it there. They didn’t know everyone in the party, so this spot was perfect for viewing and keeping a look out on the entire place.

Orlando: “We made it fellas, and those ladies twerking over there look DTF.”

The guys laugh at Orlando’s comical statement while observing his description. Two young girls were in fact twerking away to the beats of the infamous DJ Onix. He was a regular throughout nightclubs in San My, so seeing him at this private party definitely made the guys feel like royalty.

All through the night folks were having a good time. There was no drama, no mess, and no party goers got sloppy or wasted drunk. Rhys was enjoying his time with his crew, forgetting all about how they snuck out of their dorms against their coach’s word, when his eyes noticed a familiar face.

Emmett: “You got to admit my pass to you cutting to the basket was sweet. I put that thang right in the perfect place for your dunk though!” He said with excitement, reliving the moment with jubilation in his voice.

Orlando: “Hell yeah you did! It made Widenburg’s coach call a timeout and chew his guys out.” They laughed at the memory and noticed Rhys wasn’t chiming in.

Emmett: “Ain’t that right, Rhys?” He said nudging his pal.

Rhys: “Huh? Uh, yeah. Yup, fo’ sho!” He forced a response and chuckled.

Orlando: “Man, he don’t know what we’re talking about. Rhys, who got you shook bro?” He said laughing.

Emmett made eye contact with Rhys and followed his eyes. Once he knew what Rhys was looking at, he took control.

Emmett: “Aye, yo, Sage!”

Rhys: “Bro, what you doin?!? He asked surprised and somewhat irritated.

Emmett: “Chill, I got you bro.” He replied with a smirk.

Rhys: “Nah bro, for real, you don’t need to do this.”He was more nervous to speak to Sage than upset at Emmett for calling her over.

Sage walked over to the group of guys with a bright smile. Rhys couldn’t tell if it was the moon shining through the penthouse windows or her grin that shed a spotlight on their night. His heart skipped a few beats as he caught a quick sniff of her scent. Lavender, with a hint of shea butter and vanilla. It appeared she was keen with her appearance and health.

Emmett: “How you doin’ little sis?” He said giving her a hug.

Rhys (in his head): Little sis?! What the fuck?!

Emmett: “This is my homeboy Orlando.” He said pointing to his right. “And my good friend Rhys, I don’t think you two have ever met.” He added, with mischief in his voice.

Sage: “Hey Orlando. I heard you had 20 points tonight. Good job!”

Orlando: “Okay little sis, keeping up with the squad I see. Thank You.”

Sage smiled at the compliment and then turned to Rhys. “Hi Rhys.”She said with a calm and soothing tone. It was like music to Rhys’ ears to hear her say his name. It was definitely something he could get used to.

All Rhys could do was smile and throw up a hand to wave. Orlando had never seen his best friend so awestruck by anyone in their entire life. Not even the time they met Michael Jordan at a basketball camp their freshman year of high school.

Emmett was equally surprised and gave Rhys a quick nudge as to snap him back to reality.

Rhys: “Hey.” He was able to let out after encouragement from Emmett.

Sage: “What are you boys doing here? Does coach know about this?”She asked, knowing her brother and that most likely they snuck out.

Emmett: “Ah, don’t worry about all that. I should be asking you the same thing. What are you doing here freshman?”

Sage: “I was invited by my friend.”She said turning around and looking in her home girl’s direction. “She really wanted to come, but didn’t have a plus one.”

Emmett: “Well just be careful out here tonight, and don’t drink too much.”

Sage: “Okay, dad.” She said rolling her eyes. “Bye guys, nice to meet you.”She said locking eyes with Rhys.

He froze with her eyes locked on his. It was as if time stood still and it was just her and him. He imagined all the discussions they could have with one another if they weren’t at this party. He would ask her to dance, convince her to ditch her friend, and just converse with her all night. He wanted more of Sage, not physically, but spiritually. That’s when he knew she was the one.

Orlando: “I mean if I knew he was going to freeze up like a little school boy at the sight of your sister, I would of left his ass in Newcrest.” He said teasing Rhys.

Rhys: “Whatever fool, I heard you that time. I’m not frozen, just...She’s just...”

Emmett: “Go ‘head bro, you’ve got my blessing.” He said feeling the energy from Rhys and knowing he had nothing to worry about. He had never allowed any of his friends to talk to his baby sister, and there had been many growing up. Now she’s a young adult, and in college, so he felt it was time to release his big brother reigns and allow her to do her own thing. Besides, what better way to keep dibs on her than to allow one of his closest friends to court her?

Rhys: “You sure bro?” He said, eyes wide, and bushy tailed.

Emmett: “Yeah my man.” He replied with a smile. “She likes comedy movies and cheeseburgers. Thank me later.”

Orlando laughed at Emmett’s subtle advice. “Aye, come with me to the bar. I need a damn shot after all this cupcake talk.”

Emmett and Orlando left Rhys and walked over to the bar. Meanwhile, Sage had made her way back to Janae. Rhys noticed they were hysterically laughing about something and hoped they weren’t bagging on him and his boys. He swallowed his nervousness, slid a piece of gum into his mouth, and mustered up the courage to ask Sage for her time.

To his surprise she agreed, but took a few minutes to say goodbye to Janae first.

Sage: “I’ll text you when I’m back at the dorm. Hell, I might even just come to your room and wake you up.” She said with a grin.

Janae: “Please don’t, just text me bitch. Be safe.” She replied with spunk as she waved and walked away.

Sage and Rhys took a seat on a nearby couch and began their first one on one conversation. Rhys had waited for this moment since their first session in Business Communications.

Rhys: “This party is pretty lit, and this house, my god.”

Sage: “I know right.”She said surprised that he began their first conversation without being all cheesy or directly hitting on her. “And this view, I’ve never seen anything like it.”

Rhys: “Me....either.” He said pausing between his words as he was referring to her looks and not the skyscrapers against the city skies.

Sage: “So, how was your game tonight?” She asked, knowing how he did but not wanting to mention that on their first encounter.

Rhys: “I played well.” He replied, wondering how she knew Orlando’s stats and not his. “I had 27 points, wanted 30, but maybe next game.”

Sage: “Ooh, Mr. Big Baller I see.” She gassed him up with a smile.

The two continued their conversations for the rest of the night. They discussed his interest in basketball, along with his production on the team. They also conversed about their Business Communications class, and how easy it appeared it would be. She shared with Rhys her interest in cheeseburgers, just like Emmett said, and comedy movies. Rhys was on cloud nine in her presence and didn’t want any of it to end. Sage ended up riding back to the city with the boys. She and Rhys sat in the back seat together, but remained respectful of each other’s space. Rhys didn’t want to rush, or give her the impression he only wanted one thing. He was looking to build a true friendship, and make her his girl, forever.

Previous | Beginning | Next

[earthcried]

The crickets chirp idly in the middle of the cold spring evening. He’s taking his time, dreading of what's to come upon entering the warehouse. Skidding his old shoes against the ground allowing a grinding like noise to scrape against the old stone. He shifts the backpack on his body adjusting his arms. Drake hated going back empty handed. Drake is more than skilled enough to do this. Work with the team of them distracting the target and he’d steal whatever was on the table. If they were caught, run with what is acquired and move on. Yet, Drake could get anything without people pointing out that they were stealing something. They really should do the Ration Searches in the evenings as Drake had offered before. But, it was put down with the worry that without energy to work properly, especially with the distraction of home becoming a problem. Drake wishes that they would’ve listened. He wishes that they would’ve listened in the first place. Drake stared up at the towering warehouse, abandoned and old. He wouldn’t be surprised if this thing fell on top of them. But, it were inconspicuous and unsuspecting to house them. So, it were home. 

“Fuck me...” Drake murmured pushed past the old doors groaning in response echoing off the walls. Eyes stared at him. The group “leader”. Benjamin. A 17 year old who had taken up command so to speak after the last groupholder left after turning of age and finding a work suitable for him. Straight-forward and a good thinker. Drake gave him credit for that. But the stocky tall boy had some issues himself. A little bit of a narcissist. His brows furrowed in the darkness standing up from the game of dominoes that he had bought for the group. His dark black hair matted with old sweat. One of the people Drake tended to avoid, but had no choice but to talk to. He’s after all the ration holder. Drake sighs entering into the home. 

“Drake.” He acknowledged. His deep tone sending a shiver down his spine.

“Benjamin.” He acknowledged back. He stands tall approaching the other. 

“So. Whot’s our food for today?” Drake exhales ready for his reaction as he knows how it goes. Dumping only three pieces of wrapped food onto the ground.  Tossing aside the bag. “Really, Drake? Tha’s all?” And here we go. “Drake, we can’t keep doin’ this. Weren’t you working with your team earliah? How come they had more than you?” Drake shrugged. “I unno’, They did bettah than me, I guess?” Benjamin sighs annoyed. “Drake.” He stated firmly. “This has been a problem for the two weeks now. You haven’t been pulling your wait as you should’ve.” Drake’s expression tenses. “You know tha’s nah fair t’ me! I am tryin’ loike anyone else here.” Benjamin leans in. “Then explain to me how you’ve been getting LESS then AT LEAST 6 pieces of food? We have 12 people here, we HAVE to stockpile. Otherwise, we run out and we starve. You KNOW this, Drake.” Drake felt his body slowly shift into that submission. “I do know this! Buh, I had a officah on m’ ass for almost an hour having saw our group aftah our targets called em! So, yeah, I had a tough toime today. We can try this again next week. Our team has enough.” Benjamin gripped his shoulder. “No, Drake. We’re talking about this now. I am tired of having to explain this to you. We do rations every few days, we stockpile-.”

“I know, Benjamin! Oi’m too tired t’ argue with you. Jus’ leave me alone. Y’ can yell ah me in th’ mornin.” Benjamin tightens his expression. “Drake, when I say that I am nah kidding about pullin’ your weight. I. Am. Not. Kidding. You’ve been here for about 6 months now and you’ve been fine since then. But this sudden “I don’t give a shit” attitude is pissin’ me off.” Drake felt his bubble starting to push inward making him uncomfortable. But, Drake wasn’t going to take this either. He’s too tired and he’s incredibly annoyed about being scolded and pushed around.. “Benjamin. I.. am.. Tired. I will do bettah. PISS OFF.” It happened in that moment where a sudden inflicting pain struck across his cheek from the massive hand of Benjamin echoing off of the walls. Drake yiping in response. Holding at his cheek staring at Benjamin awestruck that he’s ever struck anyone for the first time. Drake was glad that he was shocked in that moment to not even realize that there were frost crevicing on the grounds cracks making the ground slippery. “This isn’ over, Drake. We’re going to discuss your punishment further in the morning. Now get out of my sight.” With that, he exited the main warehouse area slamming the door shut upstairs which is his room watching everyone.

“Piecea shite.” Drake said spitting on the ground trying to adjust to the redness on his cheek grabbing his bag and storming to the backyard slamming it behind leaving another tense echo in the air.

[craniumaniac-moved]

【 night of the lockdown . 】✘

a discord rp ft. @tender--age--in--plume​

This roleplay is set during the night of the Po Town lockdown put into effect by Plumeria after a bomb threat. The threat was a result of the events that took place the previous night when Rico ( @komala-scientist ) purposefully baited Guzma to beat him up. Warning: It’s long, took us over 12 hours to get done, and it’s emotional.

Mercifully, things have begun to quiet down. Shady House is fuller even than usual, with many team members having chosen to stay in the main house due to the lockdown rather than overflowing into the surrounding houses as is typical. The beds are packed and many have piled up on the floor like dogs. Plumeria doesn't mind, She likes knowing exactly where everyone is, especially at a time like this. Unable to sleep, she laps around the mansion and checks in again and again. Eventually her travels lead her to the Throne Room; she hesitates with her hand on the knob for a moment before sighing and letting herself in. "Hey, G."

While it may have been a hectic day for everybody else, it had been a quiet one for the Skull Boss. Holed up in his room and not communicating with anyone, he napped, he snacked, he drank, he smoked, he watched porn, and he played some GTA and even some Pokemon Crossing. Currently, he sat on his bed, a drawing pad open in front of him, many colored pencils scattered around him, and a bottle of gin nestled between his legs. He's surprised when she comes in, looking up with a small gasp. She'd been keeping him updated professionally, but other than that he didn't think she wanted anything to do with him currently. This mess was all kind of his doing ( but mostly Rico’s, as he would strongly argue ), although he wasn't taking it very seriously himself. He considered the entire series of events to be completely stupid, to put it frankly. "Hey, P. Sup."

There's a little pause as she notes his relaxed posture, a hint of resentment welling in her. The door closes behind her and she folds her arms, regarding him with a cool gaze. "Have a nice night?"

He shrugs, looking back down to his drawing pad to continue coloring something in. "I guess... Just tryin'a keep chill."

A small sigh ... she approaches the bed and comes to sit next to him.

He's quiet for a little bit as he puts the finishing touches on a Scolipede doodle. When he's done, he decides a big swig of his drink is overdue, still finding it hard to look at her. "How're you doin'...?"

"Shitty," she replies honestly, leaning over to slump against him. "Long night. Think shit's coolin' down now though."

"Ya prolly deserve some good sleep, y'know..." Another swig.

"Maybe ... was worried about you, though." She glancing at the sketchbook. "Guess maybe I shouldn't'a been ... looks like you ain't been much bothered."

"Oh, 'm bothered, that's fo'sure." He reaches to flip to the next blank page in the sketchbook, starting to think of what to draw next. "But I ain't scared."

There comes a small huff through her nose. "You ain't scared'a nothin'."

"Well... guess 'm lyin' a lil bit. I'm scared'a you bein' upset wit' me..."

Silence, for a few moments. "...I ain't very happy right now, that's for sure. But ... I dunno. I ain't really pissed at you."

In those few moments, he grabs a black colored pencil and nearly puts it to the paper multiple times before he realizes he can't draw with someone watching, not even Plumeria. A sigh. He closes the sketchbook and starts to bundle up the pencils. "I'unno what ya want me to do. I didn' fuckin' do nothin' wrong..."

Sighing deeply, she leans back against the headboard. "I know. I was pissed at you for not tryin' and then you tried and Rico went and fucked shit up. I just ... I dunno why you couldn't both try make it work for me. When one'a you was tryin' the other one was makin' shit hard and then you switched places. I was real excited when I thought shit might actually be okay ... I wanted it so bad. More then I ever wanted anything. And now it's all shit."

"Yo I fuckin' learned from my mistake before, s'why I was tryin' to try last night. Rico's a fuckin' idiot t'not go 'long wit' it." He flops his art supplies to the floor next to the bed, stretching out his legs and leaning back with her, gulping down some drink as he does so. "I knew you'd be real excited. I was, too. Not really to be his friend or nothin' but I knew it'd make ya happy... n' proud'a me. I was real proud'a myself, steppin' back 'fore I dove in givin' him a hard time, instead decidin' on tryin'a relate to him somehow. Even if it was just our fuckin' birthdays bein' around Halloween." A pause. "Yeah. It is all shit. I'm real, real sorry, Plumes. He's not gettin' another chance wit' me after pullin' that shit on me..."

She anticipated that, but it's still painful to hear. She pulls her knees up to her chest and wraps her arms around them, resting her forehead against the backs of her knees. "I know."

But wait, there's more. The kingpin's about to go on a tipsy ramble. "He fuckin' used me, Plumeria. Asshole was thinkin', 'Hurr durr I wanna get hurt 'cause boohoo I hate me! I know what I can do! I can go make the big dumb thug get mad! I'll take advantage 'a how easy it is to piss him off 'cause he's so stupid! Insert some random ass gibberish ain't nobody got time for! And fuck Plumeria's feelin's to hell 'cause obviously I don't give a shit about her!' Arceus damn!" A deep breath. He's clutching the neck of the gin bottle so tightly his hand is trembling and his knuckles are white. "Ya tol' me to shut up earlier when I was tryin'a say this, but you keepin' close to him got me real worried."

As he speaks, she closes her eyes. Okay, Melia. Keep it together. Slowly, gradually, she unwinds, stretching her legs back out and sitting up to square her shoulders. How stupid of her to think that coming to him would give her a soft place to land. "Yeah, well. I wouldn't be who I am if I gave up on every person who hurt me," she replies stiffly.

Finally, he turns his head to look at her. "You tryin'a hold on like he's family, but he ain't yo' family, Plumeria. That's me, that's all'a Skull, that's Tutu n' anybody else you close wit' who don't fuck wit' us like T n' even Hyde. I been fucked wit' by Rico, so's T."

"You tellin' me you want me cut him out?"

He runs a hand through his hair and sighs, becoming distressed. "I can't control what ya do. Jus' don't be fuckin' disappointed in me for not acceptin' him like he's part'a the fam."

Time passes. At last, a slow nod. "I understand." She's still not looking at him.

And he looks away. Hugging the bottle close to his stomach with one hand, his other hand covers his eyes as he hunches over. "I'm sorry..."

Her eyes snap closed again. "I'm sorry, too."

"You still gonna be disappointed in me, aren't ya?" Shuddering sigh. "Dammit, I was so proud 'a me, Plume, I really was... Couldn't wait for you bein' proud 'a me, too..."

"I ain't disappointed in you, G. I'm just ... disappointed. I really wanted this, and I--thought I could trust him." Her voice breaks.

He sits up, places his bottle on the floor and scoots himself over to her, arms slipping around her for a Komala hug. "It's gonna be aight, y'know..."

The moment he touches her ... she breaks. It starts with a sharp, haggard gasp and a flinch, her eyes shutting tight as her body tenses up, and then continues with ugly, shuddering sobs that wrack her body.

Although it's not something he has never experienced with her before, the reaction admittedly startles him. He doesn't know whether to stop or to hold on tighter, so he simply loosens his grip for the time being. "Plumes...! Shhh... I got ya, Plumes...," he attempts to soothe.

She grips his arms around her tightly as though to keep him from slipping away, squeezing, gulping down deep, wet breaths until she calms down enough to speak. "...Sorry."

Since she seems to want him to continue holding, he squeezes and he doesn't stop, rocking her back and forth slightly. "That's okay, P. Just let out what ya need to. G's here for ya."

"I'm––s–so–––fuckin'–––tired..." She chokes, gritting her teeth hard as she tries to swallow down the fresh wave.

"C'mon, let's put ya to bed then? You been workin' real hard today..." He doesn't quite get it.

"No...not tired like that. Tired of this." She sniffs wetly, lifting a hand to swipe at the tears that have fallen.

"Oh..." He lovingly kisses her cheek and the edge of her jaw, hoping to further comfort her. "I still don't quite get what ya mean... What's 'this' exactly...?"

She stammers, then takes a big, shaky breath. "I just...spent all day...talkin' to the fam, textin' with Aether, dealin' with people wanna kill you, makin' sure everybody safe, dealin' with Nanu...and you been in here drawin'. 'Cause you think it's all stupid. Well, maybe it's stupid for you...maybe this all real fuckin' easy for you...but it ain't easy for me. It's hard. I never signed up for do this all alone. You s'posed'a have my back." A ragged breath. "Maybe...maybe you don't even care. Maybe this all sounds like more bullshit 'cause you don't think you did nothin' wrong...like that makes it better...like that means less fallout for me. Well--at least you got somethin' you wanted outta it all." She sighs. "I stayed home."

His mouth falls open and slowly and unsurely... he lets go of her. Maybe he deserved it, but that really, really wounded him. "Nobody came t' me 'bout anything...," he says weakly. "An' I didn't come to nobody 'bout anything neither 'cause I felt like I'd fuck it up. I'd get mad we was even havin' to deal with this stupid shit Rico's dumb friends brought on us 'cause they ain't know shit, 'cause he can't fuckin' make it clear he asked for it, makin' me out to be all fuckin' wrong when I—" Deep breath. He doesn't want to get off track. "Plumes... I'm real thankful ya stayed home... real thankful for all the shit you done today... been wantin' to talk to ya but I thought you was still too mad at me..." Suddenly standing from the bed, he begins pacing the room to help expend some of his newfound anxious energy before he possibly cracks, pulling at his hair.

Her eyes follow him. When he stands she wraps her arms around herself and draws a deep breath. "I know...I know." Her eyes slip shut. "I don't..." Fuck it, Melia. He doesn't understand. He gonna think me stupid. Trust him. "I don't wanna lose my dad. Again." She winces, bracing herself as though for impact.

He stops his pacing and just stares at her, hands still gripping his hair, but the tenseness in his posture goes limp with a heavy exhale. "Plumes... He ain't your dad. Even if he was he ain't been a good one, 'specially not that I ever seen."

"No...you ain't ever seen it. And you never asked, either." Her face is expressionless.

"What's'at s'posed to mean...?"

"Just ... there's more to it than you ever saw. There's more to it than I ever told you. You actin' like you got all the information ... and you don't."

He lowers himself to the floor, sitting and curling into a ball in the middle of the room. "I try stay outta yo' business like'at...," he mutters. "And... look... I been there, done that havin' a father in my life n' it's jus' not somethin' I think's worth it. Hard for me t' get, hard to want to. But if there was stuff ya wanna tell me I'd'a listened..."

Slowly, she sinks to the ground and crawls over to settle down beside him, hesitantly lifting a hand to gently stroke his back. "I... never really thought you wanted for hear it. Maybe I could'a prevented all this if I been more honest with you." She sighs. "I know it ain't a topic you got good feelin's about, but ... I dunno. It's important for me. Was important for me ... still is important for me. Just ... I guess maybe I gotta make a choice now." She bites her lip. "Nothin' I want for myself can be more important than my fam ... no matter how bad I want it."

"What options you think you got...?" His head is lifted and he turns toward her. Selfishly, he'd want her to cut Rico out. The things the man has done around him and said to him about his family—their family—are unforgivable, really. But if he is truly a father figure to her who makes her happy, Guzma doesn't want her heart broken... He'll try his best to accept whatever she chooses.

"That's the thing, G. I dunno if I got an option."

"Well then I mean what're you thinkin'...?" He uncurls himself from the position he was in and once again puts his arms around her.

"I'm thinkin'..." Deep sigh. She shuts her eyes and stiffens, refusing to lean into his embrace—not out of anger, but because she needs herself to be strong at the moment. "I'm thinkin' I been puttin' my own needs ahead'a my fam too long. If it gotta come down between him and their safety... it's gotta be them."

Guzma gives a nod. "My opinion's prolly obvious, but I do think that's smart thinkin'..."

So ... that's it. She goes stone silent and still.

"I'm... sorry. I don't want you hurtin'..."

"It don't matter." She stands. "You okay?"

"Yes it fuckin' does matter." He stands as well, letting her slip out of his arms and ignoring her question.

"G... don't."

"Don't what?!"

"Don't make this harder for me."

A big sigh. "Aight. Fine. I'll shut up."

"'M doin' what you want and what's best for the fam. You ought'a be happy." She pauses and drops her gaze, glancing towards the door. "So should I."

"I mean, I guess, yeah... but still hurts seein' you hurtin'. Always will."

"Yeah, well ... I had my chance. I fucked it up." Her words are cold--not cold like ice, but cold like a corpse.

"You didn't fuck up nothin'."

"Yeah. I did."

He crosses his arms and looks away, not wanting to argue anymore.

Silence.

"I love you. Missed ya lately, too..." His gaze is still averted.

"...I love you, too."

He looks at her with a tiny smile.

He does not receive one in kind. "You need me tonight, G?"

Swallow. Noticing she doesn't smile back, he loses his. "Uhm..." He shakes his head. A lie.

"I'm gonna need a couple hours off-base. I wanna tell him in person." She doesn't meet his eye.

"...'Kay."

Anguish.

"What is it, P? If you done here, if ya don't need me, ya can go on..."

She shakes her head. "Ain't about not needin' you. You know that, yeah?"

Nod. "Uh-huh. So what you still here for?"

"Nothin', I guess." She doesn't move.

He just stands there, looking at her with a subtle glare.

...Sigh. "A'ight. Later, G." Finally, she turns to go.

He almost stops her, wishing he could give her a quick kiss, but is afraid she'll reject it after how the past few days have gone. "Lemme know how shit goes. I'll be awake, I'll be here for ya."

There's a brief pause in the doorway. "...I know. Thanks, Guzma." She doesn't look back. The door closes behind her.

He sighs, finding his unfinished bottle of liquor to continue nursing the thing, and places himself on his throne so his bed doesn't tempt him to pass out.

[sc87confessions]

Christmas in California

As the holidays approached you made sure to finish as much Christmas shoppin as you could. Every year it seemed like you had to buy an additional present as your family was growin with more nieces and nephews, all your siblings were married except you, so you were the “cool aunt”. You weren’t sure whether to get Sid a present as you guys had only been datin for a few months however you preferred to be safe than sorry so you ended up gettin him a few small gifts. You felt like everythin was goin well between Sid and you, you guys haven’t argued much since the bar incident, just minor disagreements but you guys communicated well on it. For the first time in a while you felt as if Sid was the one for you, it terrified you due to the fact that the first and last time you felt that way about someone, they ended up cheatin on you. You were headin back home from the mall when you saw that Sid was callin you “Hey Sidney, what’s up?” “Not much baby, just got home from practice, you?” “Ughhh shoppin, thankfully done though” “Haha, it still surprises me that you’re not a big fan of shoppin” “I mean I like it but for like less than an hour ahahah” “Hey, anyway you can stop by, I would like to talk to you about something” he said more seriously Shhiitt what now? “Uhmm, yeah sure, everythin okay?” “Yeah, everything’s fine, it’s just something I prefer to talk to you in person” “Alright, well I’ll be there in a bit then” “Drive safe….bye” You were on your way to Sid’s when you called Jake a little panicked “DUDE, Sid wants me to go to his house to talk about somethin” “So?” “What in the world does he need to talk about that has to be in person, he’s probably gonna break up with me” “(Y/N) you’re crazy, I mean I don’t know what he wants to talk about but I’m sure it’s not that darlin” “I hope not, I’m tryin to remember if I did somethin wrong hahaha” “WOW haha well everythin is your fault, let me know how it goes, I’m here at Leila’s place” “I told you, you’d thank me about givin her your number one day Jake” “Uh huhhh” “Where’s my thank you?” “I’ll thank you when I know she doesn’t want me for what I do” “Jake, I love you but you’re crazy darlin haha, talk to you later bye, love you” “Love you too, good luck” You arrived at Sid’s and gave yourself two minutes to relax before you headed towards the door. You rang the doorbell as you heard the door open, Sid must’ve heard your truck. “Hey, come on in” he said as he gave you a kiss You were pretty exhausted from shoppin so you headed to his couch and got relaxed but you cut straight to it “So what did you wanna talk about in person?” you said as you tilted you head back on the pillow. “UHumm well, I noticed that I’ll actually be in LA for Christmas time, we play the Kings and Ducks too actually, so I know you’re spending it there too right?” “Yep, Thanksgivin with my sis and Christmas in SoCal” “Is your sister going there for Christmas too?” ​​​“Yeah she is actually, why?” “Well I wanted to see if you’d like to bring your family to the games?” “Like the entire family?” “Yes” “Sidney, there’s like four of us siblings, each one of my siblings are married, there’s a total of 5 kids, so it’s about 12 people we’re talkin about here” “So?” “You can get that many tickets?” “Of course, now here’s the more serious question, is it okay to spend Christmas with you guys?” Fuck that means he has to meet my family “If you’d like yeah you’re more than welcome to” “I want to meet your family, see where you come from, where you grew up” he said as he sat down next to you. “Are you sure you’re ready to meet them Sidney” “Of course, if I wasn’t I wouldn’t be telling you” “Jeez, Sid I thought I did somethin wrong” you said chucklin a bit “Really?” “Yeah when people say I wanna talk it’s usually not good haha” “Well, this time it is, plus I wanted to see if you wanted to come with me to get some dinner, I’m starving aha” he gave you a kiss and got up to get the keys. You guys had a nice quiet dinner at Panera and headed back home to watch a movie, you felt yourself fallin asleep when you knew it was best for you to go back home. You kissed Sid goodbye. On your way home, you kept thinkin about how your family would receive Sid, you knew they will like him but you still felt nervous about them meetin each other. What made you nervous was that Sid was gettin more serious in your relationship, which scared you a bit as you felt yourself fallin in love with him. The next day you got up and headed towards the gym with your buddies, you talked to them about it to get a feel on their perspective. All of them agreed that Sid was serious about your guy’s relationship. They were very happy that you had found someone to finally complement you in your life. As you head towards Dunkin Donuts you called your sis to let her know first about Sid wantin to spend Christmas with them, your family knew that you were datin someone, but they you hadn’t let them know if it was serious or not. Your sis was shocked at first and so was your mom when you told her that Sid wanted to meet them, they were mostly surprised that you yourself was okay with it. It was finally the day before Thanksgivin when you were on your way to the airport, Sid had left the day before for a two week long road trip in Canada. You guys had told each other to be safe and to have a great Thanksgivin. You were excited to see your sis and glad that you had a small distance flight as you weren’t a big fan of flying. Your sister and her family picked you up from the airport, your sis was the most excited to have you there for a holiday, even though you guys were about 15 years apart you were as close as ever. You helped cooked dinner, bakin your famous apple pie that your brother-in-law loved, as you two watched all the lovely football that was on. You were watchin the tv as you were mixin the dough for your pie. You could tell your sis wanted to talk about Sid when you got a text from him askin how you were doin. “So what did mom say when you told her about Sidney?” your sis asked curiously “She sounded excited, that she couldn’t wait to meet him and see how he is” “I’m excited to meet him too, he sounds like an amazin guy, I told you you’d find your prince charming” she said as you rolled your eyes but smiled. “He’s not my prince charmin, he’s my hockey prince with a big butt, like huge hahhaa” “Have you guys had sex?” she asked “Uhmm no, frankly I’m kind of scared too, you know it’s been a while plus I don’t know if I’m ready for that yet, like don’t get me wrong every time I see him I want to jump his bones hahaha but like I want to save that aspect for when we’re serious” you said honestly “That’s good, take your time, he seems like he’s respectin you in that and in what you do too” “Yeah his schedule’s always busy that’s why he understands mine” You spent another few days at your sister’s as you guys went hikin and fishin, you loved comin here to visit her because you always felt relaxed bein surrouned by nature. You enjoyed the country lifestyle but liked how she lived closer to a city as well. It was the best of both worlds but when you visited your sis, you enjoyed the countryside. When your plane landed you were lookin forward to seein two people, Sidney and your dog. You were goin to take her with you to SoCal so she can see your family again and you felt bad leavin her for more than three days. You were excited to see Sidney as you couldn’t wait to see what the plan’s were for Christmas but he wouldn’t be home for another week. You picked up overtime at work which was goin to help you financially, even though you didn’t need it but you also because you loved what you do. Jake was still in Texas visitin his family so it was you and your other coworker Casey patrollin around Pittsburgh. Casey had actually met a girl at one of the games, they had been datin for awhile as well, so it was nice to see him happy. “I think its funny how when the three of us met we were all single and now look at us” Casey said laughin “What was it that we said, none of us were goin to date because our life was too damn good haha” “And now we’re whipped” “uhM, speak for yourself on that one” “Bullshit” “Whatever” you said as you called Sid durin your lunch time When Sid answered, Casey made a whippin sound to make fun of you even more. You guys had a good convo with Sid tellin you about how he’d have to fly with the team and stay with them in California, which you were okay with as it was baby steps in Sid meetin your family. ​​​That week flew by with all the work that you had been doin, you knew that you weren’t goin to be home for Christmas but you were still in the mood to decorate the place as Jake was stayin here to meet Leila’s family. Sid had arrived from Canada and looked pretty chipper to be home and especially to be with you. You were both excited for Christmas in California.​​

[actionsandreflections-blog]

Transcribed Interview: Family History

I decided to interview my grandma. She has always been a storyteller and I know a lot about my family’s history already, but I wanted to dig deeper and create a written record of her knowledge. My grandma is a poet, a photographer, and an active member in her community. For work she farmed for most of her life, and was also a janitor for her local school district, and a mother of three boys, as well as many foster kids. I would like to make this paper into a written record of her stories.

ME: Yea I was supposed to come up with questions, but I didn't.

GMA: Oh well just go by that.

ME: I guess I kind of wanted to know more about the dairy industry, and what it was like being a part of that.

GMA: You want when I was born, my age?

ME: I guess I want to start on how we got this farm.

GMA: Ok, well let's do the beginning so you got a got a little bit of trace, I was born in San Diego, March 17th, 1946, and when I was a year we moved to Newberg Oregon and had 15 dairy cows, and that would've been...1947, and then in 1948 we moved up to the lower farm, and share-farmed with my uncle and aunt, and we...

ME: Did they own the farm?

GMA: No, Walt Mavis did. We lived in the little house, and they milked about probably 35 cows by hand, no machines, probably for about the first 5 years and then they got milking machines, and we didn’t have power down there either.

ME: What year was that? How old were you?

GMA: 18 months old when we came to my uncles place in the Wynoochee, and they had no electricity for the first 2 years probably, and then they had a generator, and then they had two milking machines, and mom would have electricity in the house from a little wire that led from the milking barn to the house, and she always knew when dad was coming up for dinner because they cut the generator and it would be back to no electricity.

ME: So, you... when, did your family buy the farm?

GMA: yea, ok, when I was 9 in 1955, my mom told my dad (she was Depression Dust Bowl Oklahoman, my dad was Kansas/Colorado) that she wanted her own farm, she wanted to buy this farm, Parker and Margaret Askew's place and Dad said "Rachel we don’t have two dimes to rub together" and she said "well go to the federal land bank in Chehalis and get a loan" and he goes "you have to have money down" and the place cost $24,500 it was 185 acres, the barn was built in 1931 so it was, not old, and this house was built in the '20's....Anyway, so dad said "we don’t have two dimes to rub together" and she said "I have money" and he goes "well where might that be? it’s not in the bank." and she said "it’s in a rusty can on top the cupboards in the kitchen!"

ME: I think you've told me this one before!

GMA: yep on top the cupboard, and so he gets a big ladder (cuz those old cupboards were so tall) and it was behind all this other stuff in front, and she had saved... everything from babysitting’ the neighbors kid, from selling cream and vegetables, everything she made from when they got married in 1944, till 1955, 11 years… she had over $500 in that can! And she knew if she put it in the bank that my uncle and my dad would have spent it on something for my uncles place, and so they took that money down to the federal land bank and the man said "Rachel! you got way more than enough money here for a down on that place, you can go home and buy frank somethin’ rusty for your new farm!" and that’s how they got this farm, 185 acres,  and $24,500 which in ‘55 was a lot of money, but this house, when the homesteaders came to this farm, when the homesteaders came up this valley there was no road, it was called Chehalis county not grays harbor, and they thought if a road was ever put in it would be on the west side of the Wynoochee, well it was put on the eastside. So there were 8 or 9 swinging bridges that those farmers would carry their 80 lb. cans of milk across those swinging bridges to meet the milk truck and then the Askews’ built this big barn, its 80 some feet by 40 some big, it’s a gothic, and I can give you pictures, it was built in ‘31, and in ‘35 they brought this farm house with two teams of horses from across the river up the incline and set it on this basement and it’s not off a half an inch. And that was before they had power, that was in 1935 I think, or ‘37. So there was no power until 1955 we lived up here, we moved up here in 55, I’m sorry, in 1952 when we were still down at my uncles place the PUD told the farmers that if they would cut and skin and plant the cedar poles that they would bring the wire, and that’s when we got electricity in 1952. so we moved up here to the other place on December 20th, 1948, and then Christmas Eve of 1955, we moved the last batch of calves up the road to this farm, and she was having a lot of trouble walking and so much pain and mom took her to the emergency and she had appendicitis Christmas eve!  That’s when we got our last animals moved up to the farm. Then, I was raised here I learned to swim in the Wynoochee, but it was  just 7 days a week, 12-16 hours a day depending on time of year, ya know, the crops... and my dad, we had a big manure shed out there that he would haul all the manure from the barn and dump by hand with the wheelbarrow, and in the spring, he would unload it all by hand, into a manure wagon and spread it on the fields, and when I was I think a junior in high school, I musta been about 16, he got a John Deere tractor with a loader and he was able to unload it with the loader instead of doin’ it by pitchfork, it was amazing the work they did... I have pictures of that.

ME: What was it like being a girl?

GMA: we just all worked hard, there was no difference, us girls, worked as hard as the boys, we weren’t as strong as the boys physically, but I threw bales, drove hay truck, washed milkers, my sister washed the barn, and when she got married I had to do that… I ran baler, I never mowed hay much, dad always did that, but, I raked a lotta hay, we did pretty much everything the boys did, we just weren’t as physically strong, but, we were real respected there were never put downs, and then as your grandpa jerry and I got married, we moved to Alaska for ‘67-‘69 from Coffman Cove, Alaska and took over the farm again and then I ran the hay crews, and when we came back we always had girls on the crew, and boys, and everybody got along good, if there were any kind of put downs they got fired, I only fired one boy and that was because he was kept tormenting the other kids and fighting with ‘em so I told ‘em he just need to get his paycheck and go home... and the other kid I fired he just wasn’t pulling his weight, and he was staying with grandma and grandpa, he was so embarrassed! he begged me to hire him back and which I did that same afternoon, and then he worked, because he was too embarrassed to tell grandma! Fred was his name, but out of all the kids, and they wanted to work, the kids would be calling us, coming by, calling me on the phone, you know, wanting farm work, to work, make money.

ME: So, when was that around?

GMA: That would been in the 70's, cuz we came back in ‘69 and that’s when we took over the farm in the 70's and 80's and then we quit dairy farming in 1982, but we started switching to beef cattle and then we still put in bales of hay for alotta years. We still hired kids to work, and they were all wonderful. But the best help, the best workers we ever had was your dad, and your uncles. Jerrod, Kevin, Arnie, they were the best. Yep.

ME: What was it like working with Darigold? Was it a contract?

yea it was and we got paid if your milk was always clean and never, if you had dirty milk or ever got antibiotics in it or something you were degraded, and so you got lot less price and we always kept everything clean, and so we were grade A and we had a base that you, it was like shares I guess and you got paid really top dollar for that, and then if you had over that base then you got a little less, but we were always grad A dairy with Darigold and they were a fine outfit to sell for. We always milked with 3 milk buckets on the flat, you called it, cuz you always locked your cows in the stanchions, and you carried bucket from cow to cow. but, well in ‘73 we had to switch to a bulk milk tank, which was more sanitary, instead of cans. And then we were having to choose to go either milking parlor or pipeline and that’s when we decided to get outta business, and we got out when the price of dairy cattle were real high so we got out at a good time and then we started raising beef.

When you were raising beef were they just over there (across the river)?

We had em over here, and we had an old cow named Red. I went to Badgett’s, they had a big auction and we bought, mom and I did, 48 calves, raised em on the buckets, powdered milk, and that was the tame herd, and the one calf we named her red, she would moo in the spring and take the whole herd across the river, and in the fall she would come over here and moo at the gate and we would let her into the pastures. and when she dies, that’s when the rest of ‘em wouldn’t come back and that’s how i ended up with the wild cows...and they came back the first year or two but as their new calves came on, they just didn’t have this leadership of old Red, so that’s how we got all those wild cows across the river. They wouldn’t come over to the barn anymore.

ME: That’s crazy!

GMA: It was crazy. and we trapped 26 with Kevin and H&H meat Co. and so we trapped 26 in the round pen, and I think 15 didn’t get trapped. and there was originally 43 of ‘em... and so they started reproducing again and we trapped some more, and then the rest of ‘em...people hunted them because we couldn’t catch ‘em. pretty crazy.

ME: So people hunted them? Did you let them?

I let them they paid me cheap, I didn’t charge ‘em very much, and they would get over...like you would a elk. and it was work. and then we had 3 really crazy ones and I had a hunting party goin’ in because they kept going down to the neighbors, they didn’t want em with their cows cuz they were purebred Saler's and they didn’t want our cows, ya know, breeding their Saler show cows. And Sue called and said "call off your hunters we got the game department going in" and they got the last 3. and they were gone and I was so relieved, I mean the weight off my back… no more worries.

ME: I kind of wanted to know more about grandpa, when did you meet him?

GMA: Ok, I was workin’ in the restaurant, my first job was washin’ dishes in the smoke shop restaurant in Aberdeen and his sister in law was there as a waitress and she introduced him to me, and he kept asking me out and I didn’t want to, and then finally i went out with him and then we just started going fishing and he took me over to meet his grandparents and it was probably a 9 month friendship, nothing serious, I mean holding hands maybe, after 6 months! (laughs) I was kind of done on guys, I mean I was like snail slow… (laughs) And so finally he won me over and we got married on my 21st birthday on march 17th of ‘67, went to Alaska ‘til you know, ‘til your dad was born up there, and then we came back to farm. but he was in Vietnam, see he woulda been, oh gosh, I think he got outta Vietnam in '65 so... and he was in there what ‘63 to ‘65 he was in Vietnam, but he was only there 10 months, he wasn’t like today’s kids that go 3 and 4 times to Iraq or wherever, he was there for 10 months and then he came out. It messed him up, his mother said all three of her sons were never the same, one brother was in Cuba, his other brother Dave was in panama, and Jerry was in Vietnam and she said "I wish you could’ve known them before they went in the service because they were completely different human beings then when they came out" they were... um... never the same. and we had a good life here, it was ya know.... 7 days a week, 12-16 hours a day (laughs) pretty much depending on the season... I mean in winter you had a little more down time to relax but summer was just sun up to sun down. and then we took your dad and uncles when we quit dairy, we took em camping out to Sequim, did a road trip for three nights, and then um, I think it was 1985 we went to Yellowstone, so that’s basically the only trips we had in 16 years... And we did go to a few couple funerals in Yakima and two weddings overnight in Yakima and that’s pretty much it. (laughs)

ME: Wow, yea in class we are talking a lot about labor movements and stuff like that although you weren’t really wage earners I guess since you had property and stuff?

GMA: Yea oh gosh when we started, it mighta been $7 for a hundred pounds, and when we quit it I think in the spring in 82 we were up to 12$ per hundred pounds... and I don’t know what they get now I read somewhere in 2014 they were getting 18 per hundred pounds but their prices, to their prices today, it must be like 8x more, so what these farmers get today, comparison to what we got is... they have way more problems, way more cost than we had.

ME: What did you do when you were in Alaska?

GMA: Well he drove dump truck and logging truck, and we lived in a logging camp... and they only hired on the ability of the workers not what they were like as people, and we had some not very nice people in the beginning, and then they left after that first year, some of the more undesirable families or drinking people left the camp because it was not a law that you couldn’t drink in camp but they wanted to develop it as a family camp which they ended up with a really neat family camp but after the first year or two those people left, and then they started hiring relatives and friends of the people that stayed and they developed a really neat family logging camp. But we came back to farm, because grandpa Ziegler had made a deal with your grandpa Jerry so we moved back here to farm the place. we actually took it over in ‘69 when we moved back but legally we took it over in ’72, I think paper wise.

ME: So, you did dairy cows and then you did beef, and then I think you worked at the school?

GMA: To make extra money when times were really hard I picked daffodils at the daffodil farm, I worked seasonal at heather acres, planting chutes of heather in Elma, daffodils in Satsop, Leisha Creswell, my friend, we picked daffodils together, and we would drive over to Grayland, Westport, and weed cranberry bogs and that’s when you would string up these two foot wide strips of the bog and you just get on your knees very carefully go down in the bog pullin’ out weeds with a regular screwdriver or something, and your dad and uncles would go with us on weekends, sometimes her kids went with us on weekends to make extra money, and we peeled cascara bark, picked evergreen blackberries,  and in the 40's and 50's, Esse's berry shed would drive up the Wynoochee and they had wooden flats they would give us (and I did this from when I was 4 or 5 years old) and I always got to keep my money but  they would drive to each farm and pick up the flats of berries that the farm women had picked during the day and they would pay us in silver coins, because their paper money would fly around. and then, later in my teens, the neighbors were a buying station for fir cones and hemlock and spruce for Simpson timber, and we would go out and get fir cones that the squirrels and chipmunks were throwin' down, in bags, and then we would sell ‘em. and when your dad and uncles were little I was a buying station for Simpson for two years and they paid me to take in the sacks and you have to keep records of the elevation that the cones were got, because they replanted, and they would heat them in a facility and shake all the seeds out and then whatever elevation that batch was from they would go to that area in the mountains or flatlands and re-seed by air and that’s how they planted in those days. let’s see what else, I milked for the neighbors, I milked for Baylous's (your aunt Audrey and uncle Gary) I milked for them for about 10 months and when we sold our cows your grandpa jerry took over milking for em, it was a milking parlor. And then in '88 I had volunteered so much at the high school that the staff kept saying "why don’t you just get a job down here and make money?" and so, Bill, the superintendent called me on this really hot august day, it was in the 90's (Fahrenheit) and anyway I put in for janitor, teacher's aide we called em then, or cook (I got my food service license) and it was really hot and I ran  into the house and he goes "hey pat, yo its bill here, you still want a job down here at this place?" and i said "sure what’ve you got?" and he said "janitor" and I said "sure I can do that it’s just cleanin' up alotta... just like farming cleanin' up alotta messes and poop!" and he laughed and I said "when do I need to come down and train?" and he said " you better get down this afternoon school starts tomorrow" and that’s how I got hired in 1988, and there was no background check, no interview, no nothin’, just come on down! The janitor who I was taking his place, he was movin’ to California, gave me the job description, showed me the janitor closet the mop bucket in the bathrooms and said there you go, good luck! and then I thought I would just be there a couple years or til the boys graduated and then, I was really grateful for that job because grandpa passed away in '01 so i don’t know what I woulda done if i hadn’t of had something to fall back on. and I started out at 7 something an hour, and that was in '88, until the 60 days passed and then I got a raise to 8, and then I ended in 2012, on 16 something an hour which I thought was fabulous money. And all the benefits and retirement so I thought I was very fortunate.

ME: Weren’t you a lunch lady too?

GMA: No I was just the clean-up, I worked in the lunchroom with the kids, I monitored them and cleaned up, and I loved ‘em all and I was like a hurting kid magnet any kid that had a problem or was hurting just flocked to me, and ya know, or they'd be cryin, I don’t know why, I loved the kids, I loved the staff, they were neat people. Yea, I don’t miss the job, but I still miss the kids and staff.

ME: So you were kind of like a counselor?

GMA: oh yea, counselor, I was a teacher. "pick that up, i saw you do that!" I taught in my own way... "I saw you throw that garbage on the floor! I saw you spill that milk and not mop it up now clean up after yourself, didn’t your mother teach you anything!"(laughs) I loved ‘em.

ME: How did you experience the civil rights movement and women’s movements in the 60's? like how did that affect your life?

My parents were probably more democrat, because in the early times democrats weren’t as liberal as they are today, it’s gone way in the other direction, because in the beginning they helped the Depression, they helped the poor a lot, so they were probably democrats, but we never talked about it. and then when I was 16 is when they had the march on Montgomery, about Rosie ya know, and I was appalled, it made me sick to my stomach that a certain color of people couldn’t drink out the same fountain or use the bathroom, and I woulda been there marching, now I  was a northerner, north westerner, now if i had been raised in the deep south by southern people maybe I woulda had a different attitude I don’t know, hopefully not, but I woulda been marching with them if I could have. and then we had the free love hippie days, and I was really against Vietnam, I would not have gone I would have gone to Canada, no offense to my country but, I was very stubborn and hated war, and I thought "nobody is gonna make me kill people that I don’t think need killin!" and if they had attacked my family, I always said I could shoot ‘em or defend my own country here, but to  go  over there and stick my nose in some little  country like they were, I wouldn’t have done it I would’ve gone to Canada... and then my folks were fiercely patriotic because of WW2, it was a whole different scenario, because it was the war effort and it was the whole...all the countries. What else, I loved Kennedy, everybody loved Kennedy, he was cute and his kids were cute, and his wife was beautiful, ya know, and I never paid attention to if he was a good president or not I just thought he was really cute and his wife was beautiful and they had cute kids! (laughs)

ME: I was wondering if you knew much about grandma Ziegler during ww2 and like her childhood and growin' up in Oklahoma?

GMA: She was born in Fort Cobb, Oklahoma, very poor, they were share-croppers on farms that’s why she wanted her own farm someday, and I think there were 9 kids, same as my dad there were originally 9 I think, anyway she was born in Fort Cobb Oklahoma, she survived the dust bowl, Depression, it was during the Depression a dust storm, and she said she was laid in the root cellar, for like 10 days, and grandpa went clear into town, team and wagon, and got her some real, store bought pork and beans, and grape juice that she was askin’ for, and she said when he brought that home, she ate the beans and drank the grape juice and started gettin’ better, but a lot of people died from that, the dust, and when she was 16 they came out to California, and then, she picked a lot of vegetables and fruit to make money, very poor times, if you’ve ever read the book Grapes of Wrath that was her story, but she had a sister Jule, who married Slim Lians, he had a farm in Chino, California. And so, they had a place to stay, they didn’t have to stay in the migrant camps, like the other people did, and then they eventually just got jobs.... They were all called Oakies, horribly, a terrible put down. Anybody from South Dakota, North Dakota, Kansas, Texas, Missouri, Oklahoma, it didn’t matter, they were all considered Oakies and they were very put down, extremely looked down on, but all through those states they had signs that said "Come to Golden California!" "Thousands of jobs!" and when they got there, there weren’t any. There were no jobs. And if there were, the different farmers cheated them outta money, they were bad conditions, maybe 1 or 2 outhouses per hundreds of people. If you read the Grapes of Wrath, that’s probably the best story told of those times, because that author went to those camps and wrote that book. And then when the war broke out she went to work for solar aircraft, as a riveter, but she hated the noise so they transferred her into welding, and that’s where she met my dad, he was the supervisor, and he thought she was the cutest thing that ever walked, and he used to throw orange peelings at her, being a supervisor! He tried to get her attention, at lunch, and she didn’t want anything to do with him. And so finally she came around and went to have tea with him and they started dating. He was a welder also but he supervised and he said she was one of the best welders he'd ever seen down there at that plant, they worked for solar aircraft and consolidated, and they built warplanes. and then when the war was over, my uncle worked at the shipyards, my uncle Walt, and that’s when they went to Newberg and bought that little 15 acre place and mom and dad came to visit and Walt Mavis said "well, why don’t you guys move and take over this little place because we’re going to this other place called Wynoochee valley" and so in the spring of '48 we moved there to Newberg and in '48 we came to visit up here in Washington and they just fell in love with it so Walt Mavis said "well let’s get rid of the little farm and you guys can live in the little house, we'll co-farm this place" so that’s how we got up here. And dad was born in Harveyville, Kansas, your great grandpa Ziegler, he was born in 1906 and your great grandma was born in 1921. And he graduated high school at Colorado Springs in 1924.

ME: Did great grandma ever graduate high school?

GMA: No, she had to drop out because of their lack of money, of how many kids there were to feed she LOVED school, we have an award, I have it down at the museum, that she got a really nice certificate for having a hundred straight perfect spelling tests, and she loved school. When she was in 9th grade she had to quit to go help make money to give to the family, because they were so poor. And that’s as far as she went through school. All her life she had insecurity about not finishing high school and not graduating, and she was one of the most well read and educated people by just doing it on her own, she read everything. Very smart, she’s what kept this farm in such good shape and the bills paid, she was meticulous in her bill paying and record keeping... and so, it didn’t matter, but it mattered to her that she didn’t have a high school graduation diploma, always bothered her. And my dad was no good at the bookkeeping, he always did the income taxes, but she was really more educated than he was even though he graduated from high school, because she wanted to be. You can be anything you want!

When I look back upon my grandmother’s version of history, I see the world through her eyes and the eyes of her generation. And although my grandma only ever finished high school, and has barely left her town in Grays Harbor, she has a wealth of real world experience that informs her upon the social and economic problems that she and her parents faced throughout their lives. My grandma and great-grandma, although most likely would not describe themselves as feminists, proved to the world that they could be fiercely strong, smart, and autonomous in times where history assumes women weren’t. Without them, my family’s livelihood, our farm, may have been lost long ago. Though their hard work and talents may have gone unnoticed under the guise of a woman’s duty, I hope that these stories can shed light on my grandmothers’ unique and amazing stories sprung from the lives of ordinary people.

[junker-town]

NFL Dad, Week 10: Too much poop for one Sunday

One dad, two toddlers, and seven hours of RedZone: How much football can you watch when the kids keep pooping?

I’m late to RedZone by half an hour today because we took the kids to a birthday party. As kids’ birthday parties go, this was a very good one: champagne for the adults, a bagel platter with excellent lox, and probably some stuff for the kids to do, I don’t know. I was eating bagels.

As we were walking home, thousands of families with young kids spilled out of the Barclay Center, clogging the sidewalk and slowing our progress home. It was the result of my omnipresent nemesis: Disney princesses, this time in ice skating form. Luckily, my daughter didn’t pick up any context clues from the schlock peddlers selling Cinderellas JUST janky and off-brand enough to not get sued into oblivion.

My son started to nod off in the stroller, and my wife and I started shaking him like he was a character in a Freddy movie. EYES OPEN, BROCHACHO. We learned our lesson about that last week: Stroller mini-naps lead to no nap at all, and we ain’t about that life.

When we get home, I take my son into our bedroom to change his wet diaper. He immediately rolls onto his stomach, because (A) that makes it impossible to put a fresh diaper on him and (B) he is only truly happy when he’s making my life more difficult.

My wife enters. “I got this,” she says. “Go do your job.” She is a saint.

I go into our living room and turn on the TV. My daughter is wearing my swim goggles for some reason. A minute later, my son enters the room. He is naked from the waist down. I don’t approve of my kids Porky Piggin’ around the house, but my wife said she had it. She has her reasons, I’m sure. I bite my tongue.

There are three small and pungent turds on the floor.

I go back into our room to grab my warm-up pants, and I hear my wife gasp so loudly that I fear one of the kids is injured. I re-enter the living room and there are three small and pungent turds on the floor. My wife is somehow uncertain about the culprit: “If that was ...”

WOMAN! The dog hasn’t pooped on the floor in a decade, and the only other suspect has shit on his naked thighs. I pick up the turd nearest me with a baby wipe and put it in the diaper pail; my wife handles the rest.

A couple minutes later, my son comes over to the couch — still pantsless — and urinates on my computer bag. I look at my wife.

Ladies and gentlemen of the internet, let the record show that my wife wanted my son to “air out” following several hours in a wet diaper. “I didn’t expect him to poop,” she says, which seems obvious enough. “And I didn’t put a diaper on him after he pooped because I figured, ‘What else could he do?’”

I say nothing. The secret to a good marriage — besides the dull work of continuous respect and communication — is laying off the slow hanging curveballs instead of crushing them into the third deck and moonwalking around the bases.

But yes, this was a helpful reminder that shit and piss are the main reasons I put diapers on babies. I respect all sides in this debate, however.

EARLY GAMES, FIRST HALF

— Here is how to beat the Jaguars: Don’t let their defense or special teams score. That’s it. Like, maybe try to keep Leonard Fournette from ripping off an 80-yard TD, but mostly: Make Blake Bortles throw passes. He sucks at that! You’re gonna win!

Anyhoo, the Jags score a 56-yard fake punt touchdown. They miss the PAT and are only up 6-0. Doesn’t matter: Chargers are gonna lose this game.

— Stefon Diggs hugs the goalpost after scoring:

Stefon Diggs with the Antonio Brown memorial leap to hug the goal post http://pic.twitter.com/GtZuPkBpYg

— CJ Fogler (@cjzero) November 12, 2017

“That’s gonna be a penalty. You can’t use the goalpost,” says the announcer. Let’s try to keep this in mind the next time we’re like, “The NFL allows fun celebrations now!” A player pretending he finished a Super Mario level results in the same amount of penalty yardage as trying to decapitate a guy with a helmet-to-helmet hit. What an asshole league.

— Josh McCown and Ryan Fitzpatrick, who have combined to play for almost every quarterback-starved franchise in the modern NFL, throw interceptions on consecutive plays. The video should be played on loop on a 96-inch Sony wrapped in a gold frame in the National Gallery of Art.

— Oh no, John Fox. Oh Grampy what is you doin’.

That’s Benny Cunningham diving for the end zone. Officials ruled him out at the 2-yard line. Fox challenged the ruling, claiming it was a touchdown. The replay shows Cunningham fumble the ball into the pylon, which is a turnover and a touchback.

I would LOVE to be sympathetic and try to justify the challenge, but Fox isn’t exactly the kind of coach who’s earned himself a long leash with savvy or even gutsy in-game decision-making. And the video does him no favors, either.

John Fox, when he realizes he just challenged his own team into a turnover http://pic.twitter.com/PiVybx8D0n

— Big Cat (@BarstoolBigCat) November 12, 2017

— Vontaze Burfict has been ejected for making contact with a ref. I guess those refs missed the MMQB’s soft-focus profile last week.

Vontaze Burfict—student of the game? Doting dad and husband? The Bengals linebacker would like you to know he’s not the guy he’s made out to be.

Here’s what to do with redemption profiles: Move them to the trash icon on your computer without ever pitching them.

— “Hey, DeShone Kizer doesn’t look like ass” was a thing I was typing when a Browns wide receiver was stripped, resulting in a defensive score for the Lions. After jumping out to a 10-0 lead, the Browns now trail 17-10. The Browns just always Browns so hard. It’s amazing how Brownsy they are.

— Rookie Austin Ekeler walks a tightrope down the right sideline to score a touchdown and put the Chargers up 7-6. I wrote that sentence like I’ve heard of Austin Ekeler before.

I watch around 400 prospects prior to each draft. I've never watched Austin Ekeler play football.

— Josh Norris (@JoshNorris) November 12, 2017

— Adam Thielen’s touchdown celebration is a game of leapfrog with his teammates:

Vikings play leapfrog FTW http://pic.twitter.com/D92aT1QpD7

— CJ Fogler (@cjzero) November 12, 2017

I remain agog that fans are impressed by these simplistic, unoriginal celebrations. While American chumps are oohing and ah-ing over hide-and-seek, the CFL is celebrating like IT’S the dominant football league in North America.

Here's the entire CFL limbo TD celebration (h/t @joshellman) http://pic.twitter.com/S952tA4rv3

— Vikings Blogger (@firstandskol) November 12, 2017

Now THAT is quality.

— Just when you think the Browns can’t Browns any harder: DeShone Kizer attempts a quarterback sneak on the 2-yard-line with 14 seconds left in the half and no timeouts. He’s tackled short of the goal line, and the clock runs out. The Browns go into the locker room with no points from a drive that ended a yard short of the goal line, down 17-10 despite outplaying the Lions for most the half.

SECOND HALF, EARLY GAMES

— The Colts’ Chester Rogers (???) catches a deep ball that goes for 62 yards and a score thanks to broken coverage and lousy tackling. The Colts lead the Steelers 17-3, and I would like for you to remember this the next time someone says, “The Steelers are the most complete team in the NFL right now.” Hogwash. I’ll take a team with a secondary and a consistent quarterback.

— Alvin Kamara scores a TD to put the Saints up 24-3 in Buffalo. That’s three touchdowns on the ground for New Orleans, and none thrown by Drew Brees. This is an affront to everything I’ve learned from the last 10 years of fantasy football.

— I take a nap and wake up to the Steelers tying the game with a 2-point conversion. Order has been restored to the world. It’s 17-all in the fourth quarter, and — barring a third 60-yard touchdown bomb from Jacoby Brissett -- the Steelers will put together another drive to salt this one away.

— My daughter wakes up from her nap, and there’s a poop situation that requires a bath. I’ll spare you the details, if only so I don’t have to relive them.

When my wife puts her in the bath, she is screaming and inconsolable. She won’t sit down, and any attempt to force her down just makes her shriek more loudly.

After a couple minutes of trying to calm her down, I strip down to my underwear and get in the bath with her. The water is lukewarm and only about two inches deep, and I try to ignore the couple flecks of stray poop in the bath. She stops crying, and I coax her to sit down. I read her a book about sea creatures, and my wife finishes the cleanup.

— With a minute left in Chicago, the Packers shank a short field goal that would have given them a ten-point lead. “Looks like this one might be exciting,” I almost think before remembering that we’re talking about the Bears, John Fox, and a rookie quarterback whose bar to become the greatest QB in franchise history is “Jay Cutler.”

Mitchell Trubisky’s bar to become the greatest QB in franchise history is “Jay Cutler.”

The Bears don’t even get to midfield before turning the ball over on downs.

— Remember when I said the Saints having three rushing touchdowns and no touchdown passes was an affront to fantasy? Make that SIX rushing TDs with zero through the air. This is patently unfair. Related: I do not have Mark Ingram or Alvin Kamara in any of my fantasy leagues.

— The Chargers are up 17-14 with less than 2 minutes left in Jacksonville. They can ice the game with a first down. This is what happens instead:

Austin Ekeler fumbles, the Jaguars recover the ball, and Tashaun Gipson returns it for a touchdown.

The touchdown is overturned (replay shows Gipson was down by contact on the recovery).

Marqise Lee takes a hard but clean hit in the end zone, and it appears a penalty may give the Jags the ball on the 1-yard line. Lee dances at the Chargers defenders, and gets flagged for unsportsmanlike conduct.

On the next play — 3rd and 25 — Blake Bortles makes a terrible decision and Tre Boston picks off his pass (Boston’s second pick of the quarter).

The Chargers run the ball three straight times to burn the Jags’ timeouts. Again, a first down would have ended the game. L.A. punts it back.

Joey Bosa is key in putting Jacksonville in field goal range, unnecessarily throwing Bortles to the ground after he’d thrown the ball. Josh Lambo — who the Chargers cut in the preseason to keep Younghoe Koo (RIP) — makes the game-tying field goal. This game is going to overtime.

Those two minutes of game time were some of the most watchable football I’ve seen all season. It was like someone reversed the polarity of the Texans-Seahawks shootout. “OK, let me just flick the COMPETENCE switch to OFF.” I love it.

LATE GAMES, FIRST HALF

— The afternoon slate is Cowboys-Falcons, Giants-Niners, Texans-Rams, and some leftover Chargers-Jags. Hey, smell this Chargers-Jags, has it gone bad? (You are hit with the scent of spoiled milk and used diapers.)

— Ed Hochuli is working Cowboys-Falcons, and wastes no time wasting our time with an overly lengthy explanation of a call. I agree with Drew Magary about taking away the refs’ mics. Let them work in silence while the PA announcer and TV crew explain the hand motions for the crowd and viewers at home.

— It’s weird the different stages kids can be at despite being similar sizes. My daughter, at age 3, is capable of having a conversation and expressing her feelings with words. My son, 18 months, understands everything we say, but is less a human than an organic chaos engine. The kid does forward-facing trust falls off of stairs.

— The Texans defense looks mean early — Jadeveon Clowney has been wreaking havoc, and Rams receivers can’t seem to get an inch after the catch. The Rams only have a 3-0 lead because of a Tom Savage fumble, which is also why the Texans have no chance to win this game unless the defense scores three touchdowns.

— OVERTIME UPDATE: After the Chargers got a defensive stop, Philip Rivers attempts to huck it long to Travis Benjamin, but the pass is picked off by A.J. Bouye, who nearly returns it for a touchdown, but is pushed out at the 2-yard line. The Jaguars are penalized for taunting, which pushes the ball back to the 17, which is a huge deal because Jacksonville’s long snapper is injured.

God, I love this game. It’s like watching raccoons accomplish human activities. “Their little paws are so dextrous! Incredible!”

With the Jags setting up for a game-winning kick, the Chargers get called for delay of game, and the extra five yards is enough for Lambo’s partially blocked kick to get through the uprights. Lambo, a former MLS goalkeeper, breaks out the soccer goal celebration:

Celebration of the NFL season. Josh Lambo getting his football on http://pic.twitter.com/PrmZ4ELq7y

— Chris Deeley (@ThatChris1209) November 12, 2017

— The Texans take the lead (whaaa???) 7-6 on a Bruce Ellington touchdown. Are you sitting down? I hope so, because Tom Savage just led an eight-play, 75-yard drive.

— The first interesting play of Giants-49ers is in: Marquise Goodwin hauls in a bomb from C.J. Beathard that gives the Niners a 10-6 lead.

CJ Beathard + @flashg88dwin... 83-YARD @49ERS TOUCHDOWN! #GoNiners http://pic.twitter.com/KgGj2cpNQn

— NFL (@NFL) November 12, 2017

Goodwin was clearly emotional at the end of the play, and it’s because he and his wife lost their baby boy early that morning due to complications during pregnancy. Just horrible, horrible news, and I am in awe of anyone who could muster the strength to stand up and leave the hospital after that.

— My son blows a raspberry on my wife’s leg that sounds like a wet fart that would make Foley artists jealous. He’s 18 months old, struggles to communicate with words, and falls on his face several times a day, but DAMN can the kid make fart sounds.

He tries to raspberry our dog, with less success.

— A Tom Savage red zone interception leads to a Rams field goal just before the half. It should have been at least a 10-6 lead for Houston, and instead they trail 9-7.

— Cowboys-Falcons is … fine, I guess. I’m not paying close attention, but it looks like the absence of Zeke Elliott has led to Dak Prescott trying to do too much. Dak’s hurting from the absence of Tyron Smith, too — Adrian Clayborn’s having a great game. Clayborn sacks and strips Prescott, ending what had been a solid Cowboys drive. The Falcons lead 10-7 at the half.

LATE GAMES, SECOND HALF

— My wife, attempting to sanitize the floors after the first poop incident, makes the mistake of letting the kids see the cleaning supplies. Soon my son has the broom, and my daughter has the Swiffer, and she’s shouting, “KALAYLA! KALAYLA!”

“What does ‘kalayla’ mean?” I ask her.

She widens her eyes and says, “Maloa!”

It is possible we’ve been listening to the Moana soundtrack a little too much.

— A Tom Savage pick-6 is wiped off the board by Rams defensive holding. Alec Ogletree was responsible for both the interception and the penalty. It looked like a ticky-tack penalty to me, but I feel that way about 95% of defensive holding calls. It’s a garbage penalty that shouldn’t result in an automatic first down.

— RedZone cuts away from a replay of a 94-yard Robert Woods touchdown to get back to commentary on the challenge of Sterling Shepard’s catch.

NINETY-FOUR YARD TD!@JaredGoff16 to @robertwoods! #LARams http://pic.twitter.com/QUd2pQiUgq

— NFL (@NFL) November 12, 2017

.@sterl_shep3 only needs one hand! What a grab! #GiantsPride http://pic.twitter.com/aIpFwubPru

— NFL (@NFL) November 12, 2017

Yo, RedZone, you know I love you, but go ahead and put Dean Blandino on hold so I can see that 94-yarder a second time. I can wait 15 seconds to find out if the good catch was ruled a catch.

— The Giants miss a 34-yard field goal and are still down 17-13. Ben McAdoo exerts some more of the leadership that’s led the Giants to two straight months of losses:

McAdoo is definitely a cop http://pic.twitter.com/y1kwQ3bFFW

— CJ Fogler (@cjzero) November 12, 2017

I disagree with the above tweet; I think McAdoo looks like an early aughts Central Valley rap-metal fan. But I include it because it’s a picture of what Garett describes here:

@mattufford I'm almost certain that every time they have shown McAdoo on TV, he's just watched the Jumbotron and never said a word into his headset or anyone else. You're the coach, say something!

— Garett Dmytrowich (@garettdmy) November 13, 2017

He’s right!

— I give my son his bath, and get back to the TV in time to see Sammy Watkins strolling in the end zone. It’s 23-7. Looks like that’ll do it for the Texans.

Also, I should note that I had only written as much as “Looks like that” in the sentence above before Tom Savage got strip-sacked.

FURTHERMORE: I got as far as “written” in the sentence above before Robert Woods scored again. That’s two touchdowns in 19 seconds for the Rams, and the Texans are EXTRA cooked.

— My daughter comes up to me. “Where’s Moana?” she asks, looking at my computer. We listen to the soundtrack on Spotify regularly, and I’ve shown her a couple of videos from the movie (“You’re Welcome” and “How Far I’ll Go”) while encouraging her to poop on the potty. Once she fills up her poop chart with stickers, she’ll get to watch the whole movie for the first time.

After subduing her desire to be any of the Disney princesses who just go to sleep until a man solves their problems, I’m more than happy to steer her towards Moana. It’s every father’s dream to teach his daughter celestial navigation.

— Matt Ryan throws a TD to Austin Hooper, and the Falcons lead 24-7.

what I think about every time they say "Hooper" during a Falcons game http://pic.twitter.com/rnfv5bK8rf

— Matt Ufford (@mattufford) February 6, 2017

— While I attempt to brush his teeth, my son swats my hand, smearing toothpaste on his forehead. My daughter thinks that’s funny, so she wipes toothpaste on HER forehead. “They’ll be able to play with each other,” my wife and I told each other when we planned on having two kids close in age.

— Make that six sacks for Adrian Clayborn. Let’s see, the Falcons’ next opponent is ... oh, the Seahawks. And their new left tackle just injured his ankle. Splendid. Can’t wait for that.

— Matt Breida zips through the middle of the Giants defense for a 33-yard TD to put the Niners up 31-13. The Falcons are up 27-7, the Rams are up 30-7, and this column is over without sticking around for any final scores. I’ve dealt with enough shit today, thank you very much.

[survivorsolomonislands]

Episode 4 “We Dancin“ - Mitchell

Zakriah seemed convinced Aromal would flip to Linus since they're both from Wikia... where I played and I had no idea Linus won there???? Wtf!! But whatevs. Anyways, it looked like he did, and both Monty and Linus are safe with Lily going home. Even if I don't fully trust Monty/Karen/Lexi, I do know that I know Monty more than I know Lily, so inherently I trust him more and hopefully we just keep on ousting rookies until then. 

MEANWHILE they just had tribal but my ass is like ! it's a new round !! And I got a clue last time gabbin about some toxins. And I don't know where I'm gonna find dangerous toxins, in the volcano or the lagoon?? Well let's find OUT

Well fuck, that was a mess. I had been unsure about my spot before this tribal and now I know I'm at the bottom, maybe I should have let it go to rocks but I would have been so bitter if I went home. But, at least my debate about working with Linus is officially over because its very clear I can't trust him, I mean I'll work with him because I don't have much of a choice but he's definitely someone I want gone now. I respect his moves and shit and I'd do the same in his position but its VERY obvious he's dangerous. I MISS JACOB. Gotta be a try hard now and do my best to make sure we don't go to tribal again cause I'll probably be next.

So I go searching for the Idol and you know what? When they say someone's looking for an Idol, I'm gonna own up to it. Let's destigmatize Idol searching. If we make it casual and normative, we're creating a more open and honest tribal environment - even though I didn't find the Idol, I found something better, which was a more united tribe. The less paranoid we are about things like Idols the more time we can spend getting to know each other; if we're taking the game casually, it's going to be better for our mindsets moving forward. Familiarity is good for us to have in this game, and if we're familiar with each other, when there's another inevitable swap or merge, you're gonna stick with who you feel familiar with. Open trusting tribe = open trusting alliance, to some degree.

And ANYWAYS I just found ANOTHER clue to the Hidden Immunity Idol. This one basically says that it's in the plane wreckage... but in our cute vets Idol searching doc, someone marked off that the Idol wasn't there. Sneaky sneaky! I don't know, these two clues seem to conflict with each other, but it's definitely disconcerting to have a clue that basically says it's somewhere where we've already searched and nobody's stepped up to it. I mean, if I'd found it, I wouldn't tell everyone about it, but... I didn't find it. Someone else might've. That changes a lot - it's better to be on the outside looking at the person who might've found the Idol than on the inside not knowing that everyone else knows.

The game continues to move. All I can do is to continue to develop bonds with these people and trust that, in three or so days, I'll get some confirmation when I go and search that plane wreck myself. This is quite bonkers.

In this other game I'm in with Aromal we just blindsided this guy together and then that guy deactivated but Aro thought he blocked him and he goes "whew I wasn't tryna get blocked by TWO people i blindsided in one night" so S H O O K LILY FUCKING BLOCKED HIM lily is whitney duncan and aromal is cochran confirmed rkoghkwdjfklf hold me back I'm wylin

These challenges keep getting harder and harder what the heck. Like I'm trying but I'm just not fast enough, and right now we're in the lead, but we really need to keep this up so that I'm not voted out.

What was this tribe doin in this challenge before me?? bupkiss!! their asses were GRASSES!! and then i STARTED gettin into this challenge and you know where we at now???? a 22-point first place to a 16-point second and a 12-point 3rd with 2 and a half hours left to go. i rest my CASE.

my first ever tumblrvivor individual immunity was a speedtyping challenge after jimmy went home, so i really felt like i NEEDED it and i fucking - oops now it's 22-17-12... the last time this happened i SCORED mid-confessional FUCC - DOMINATED IT!!! and it's not as dominant this time, but i'm still leading my tribe to victory here, especially when ur considerin that two tribes are winnin and not just one. we'd have to lose the next 17 consecutive points without gaining a single one to lose and I just don't see that happening.

we dancin, and the longer we continue to dance, the less time i've got to worry and the more time i've got to build bonds with people. they're gonna see my value to this tribe and, the next few days, i'm gonna get the chance to sink my personal value to them individually even further. i'm COCKY and with SOME RIGHT to be and we gon DANCE all night LONG

Y'know, when I said I would be a try hard during this challenge, I didn't think would be on my own for 80% of it. So glad everyone but Aro could help out during the last two hours. Now, I have to see if I can get them to flip on Aro or vote out Daisy rather than me. 

Mitchell did so good in that last immunity challenge like he's the reason we won omg. Also Mitchell is such a cool person like he'd be one of the vets that I would want to work with but I don't wanna tell him that bc he seems to be in the majority with the other vets idk.

It's been a while since I did one of these and so much stuff has happened!

For starters, I'm really happy with my spot in Temoana. We've won the last two immunity challenges, everybody's active and trying, and I'm in a solid and most likely loyal three-person alliance with Johnny and Jacob. Ryan/Matt are really cool and I could see the five of us working together at merge. Six if Lexi decides to stop being inactive.

But I wonder just how long we can keep this immunity streak going. If Lexi shows back up, it's gonna be a 3-3 at the first tribal we go to. That never bodes well and honestly, either one of us 3 could get votes. I'm completely unsure what to think here.

Another day safe in the game, another day closer to the end!

So we lost that last immunity. Again. Which is great, because I have barely any idea where I stand with anyone. After Aro flipping on us, everything is a little sketchy. He said it was because Lily kept throwing out his name as a decoy without telling him, which seems like a shit reason to flip. I mean, if it happened a bunch of times, sure. But it only happened once, which kind of shows how paranoid he is and how easily he'll give up his alliances. I really wanted the newbies to come out on top, but that doesn't seem like an option anymore. I'm pretty sure he's aligned with Linus. I don't think he is, or at least not as strongly, with Monty. I talked with Monty a bit and it kind of seems like right now everyone feels a little bit on their own and confused with their standing. Even Aro said he still wants newbies out on top, and we should go for a vet, but I don't trust him. L.A. and I want him gone ASAP. He's just not trustworthy, plus he barely helped in the last challenge without even giving an explanation. I know I was barely there, but I explained before that I had to go to seder which is something I really can't get out of. Plus, I did the most work in the last challenge. Monty and I agreed we want to work together, and he thinks Aro is a good decision too. I think Linus is on that page too and L.A. definitely is. I'm being a bit wary because anyone could be lying to me, but I really hope this goes as planned, and that I'm not blindsided. I really do want to work with Monty, I think we could go far together but he might not trust me after voting for him last tribal. So we'll see what happens.

Well, after heading into the immunity challenge, seeing Lily gone, and KNOWING that she had the idol is really making me worried. I wouldn't be too surprised if Daisy ended up going home next, because I'm sure Daisy was one of the three votes to keep Lily, and I know that Daisy isn't the BEST when it comes to talking game with people, and having game awareness, so that's also really not working in her favor.

As for the immunity challenge itself, DAMN that was tough. I didn't want to seem like a try hard to the other tribe, but I honestly think I got about half of our points, I didn't really go back to check after the challenge was over, but I wasn't there the whole challenge, which hopefully made people not notice me too much, but I am thrilled we won immunity. I need our tribe to not go to tribal for just a little bit longer so I have time to prepare.

As for the Temoana tribe? I've still got Luca, Jacob and I as a tight three, and I don't see us breaking up, especially considering the fall of the rookies happening on the other tribes. Lex has been pretty fucking quiet, even though I continue to try to talk to her. She participated in yesterday's immunity challenge, but I don't think that she got one point for our team. Didn't she win a main already? What's up with this girl?

I've just made a tight New Jersey and Ginger connection with Ryan, but not only that.. I really like the guy. I think he's cool, and the fact that he really hasn't done well in games lets me think that he's going to do a lot of things to make sure it isn't the same this time as it was last time.

Matt has been pretty quiet, and at this point, I've just been doing mini prayers that we get to merge with at least five rookies still in the game. I'd love for those to be Luca, Jacob, Willow and myself, maybe with a splash of Daisy, but I don't see many high hopes for her going later in the game.

My game plan going forward? Get to another swap and make more solid connections with more vets. I think the merge is going to be crazy, and I really need to begin to start working my social relationships, while fading into the background, and I honestly think I can do it, on top of my killer personality, and trying to not be super intense when it comes to comps, hopefully I won't be seen as a threat for awhile, and my social connections can keep me going for a long long time in this game. I'm in it for the long haul, and I'm not going to go down without a fight, if that's what it comes down to...

Hi! So my plan is to still stick with Monty and Linus. Me and Linus are pretty sure either Daisy or LA has an idol, so the plan is to dupe them into thinking we're voting Daisy and then actually vote out LA. Hopefully everything works out ^_^

Well, wow, last round freaking worked  and Lily was maaaad which was pretty funny. Im worried this time around, L.A and Daisy know they are at the bottom, but like,  they aren't as nervous as they should be. The main reason for this confessional is so L.A can read it after the game though. I play this game aggressively, and it was a very hard choice for me to vote how I am. I think in the short time we spent on a tribe you have become one of my favourite people I've ever played with, however every single ounce of logic tells me that I have to vote you this round. I hope you end up reading this after the game so you know that I genuinely am sorry for this, and I hope we can stay friends down the line no matter what happens. You did amazing for your first org, and this was almost completely out of your hands, so I hope you play again in the future because I know you will completely crush it. You don't deserve this vote at all, but it's the only thing that makes sense for my game since I can't betray my alliance, and they aren't willing to vote Daisy out of risk of an idol. :( 

Im getting weird, very quiet vibes :/ . I don't like it one bit.

[to-catherine-blog]

To Catherine - Day 12

It’s 6:45 AM and I know I said I’d read it when I got home but n o p e

Congrats, your last post made me cry, which is exactly what I need before a 13 hour day. 

I’m honestly so happy that you still love me. I know we’re probably not going to get back together (unless we beat back the depression in like 2 month then maybe I’m hoping), but it’s nice to know that you’re feeling the same thing too. It’s nice to know that I was as necessary in your life as you were in mine. 

Also hecking sucks if getting you better means I’ll have to bend over backward and amputate a leg then so be it. I’m not gonna have another person have their life ruined because of depression. I’ve had too many other friends who found it too much, and I’ll be damned if you don’t have a support team. The pain of a broken heart is nowhere close to what depression can do. 

I thought about that colonge earlier and honestly I don’t know what I’m going to do with it. Honestly, I don’t think I’m gonna be dating any time soon. I’m certainly not going to be dating until I leave (unless a certain someone wants to kiss me again cough cough), and I can’t imagine I’ll be ready to jump into a relationship in where ever I end up. Besides, I’m not exactly the smooth type when it comes to girls. We sort of confessed our love for each other on phones at two in the morning, remember? Not exactly the best way to do it. 

I still want you in my life this summer. I don’t know what I’ll be able to take yet, however. I know I’ll be able to text you, and other forms of textual communication. I think one on one meet ups should be good as well, whether they’re at a coffee shop or a restaurant (or in you bed just doin some platonic cuddling oh god please I miss cuddling so much). I’m not sure about group events though. There are too many ways that could hurt. I’d want to move the hair out of your eyes. Kiss your forehead. Lay your head in my lap. Too many things that arguably, we shouldn’t do any more (but also if you’re still down I am down for a head in lap party). 

For meeting up, we could do Saturday? I don’t know where you want to meet though. I’d say a coffee shop but I have a lot of stuff to give you (not the stuff you left here, I’m not ready to part with your stuff. I’m talking the depression basket), and honestly crying in public isn’t really smiled upon. But if you would feel better at a coffee shop we can do that. I think I’d prefer one of our houses but I don’t know what our roommates will be doing. 

Also since you’re working so close to St. Davids if you even need to run out and do a good cuddle just let me know and my doors will be open pls do that

I’d love to see “To Catherine” posts on your blog. I still want to know so much about you. What your thoughts are, how you’re doing, what your life is like, what your dreams are, etc. It still hurts a little every time I see you on twitter or snapchat or facebook. When you posted about your job, I wanted to tell you congratulations! I was so proud of you for getting it. But it would have been weird. Fuck I can’t wait until we’re talking to each other again normally. 

My weekend plans are ultimately fucked too. Other than the gym (which I’ve gone to once since we broke up) and studying Japanese (which I haven’t even touched), I don’t really have much else to do. Any free time I had was spent with you and now there’s just this hole of time where I don’t know what to do with. I’m honestly jealous of Marissa and Sarah. Primarily because they still get to be by your side and help you. I wish I could be doing that right now. 

You never printed out that thing I typed out, did you? Am I gonna have to print that out for you and give it to you?

I have to admit, curing your depression is a thing I want to do. If there was one thing I could do for you it would be that. But I would be lying if I didn’t have small ulterior motives. Maybe, just maybe, if we could get your depression manageable, we could start dating again. I know, you said don’t bet my hopes on it. And I’m not. Honestly I don’t think it’s going to happen. But none the less I want to help you. So badly. I don’t care if I have to drive you weekly therapy sessions, or if I have to be your weekly therapy session. If I have to deep clean your room with you, or force you to run errands. I want you to get better. I want to see that shining smile again, even if it won’t be mine ever again. That smile could end wars.