are you ready for some controversy vena? in your honest opinion, rank the li’s from each season from most attractive to least attractive 👀
pshhh, alright girl! first, various disclaimers here:
attraction to me goes beyond looks. i'm pan romantic and demisexual so you know personality and connection weight in more than looks for me. if you didn't, well, now you know. i can't discern attraction without those things, that's just how i function.
just because i don't find someone attractive, or less attractive than others, it doesn't mean they're butt ugly. it just means i don't want a taste, and that's ok.
it's MY list. feel free to do one yourself if you couldn't live vicariously through this one. also, i don't take criticism, this is the most subjective it can get.
i can see the bobby stans reaching for the keyboard. DON'T BOTHER, i don't care. that goes for lottie apologists too. drop it.
alright, let's begin!
~season 1~ the driest when it comes to numbers and quality because levi is so dull and tedious.
7th. levi. i can't stand the guy. yes, he's supposedly very attractive but i can't deal with the whole romeo thing, the very empty eyes, interchangeable personality... ugh, nah. 2/10
6th. mason. i feel like there's multiple dialogues he shares with levi, but he's waaaay hotter. like, waaaaaaaay hotter, and that's because he's a drummer. that's it lol the toby thing is so dumb and i can't take either him or levi seriously. 4/10
5th. tim. because he's so funny and endearing. i don't even rate him as an li, and often steals him from jen because he deserved better, but i still prefer him over levi and mason. 6/10
4th. allegra. i really thought, despite her whole shpeal about the jealousy, that she would have a better reason to act like that, and i was right. as an li, i feel her trope is not explored enough. plus, the way she acts all shy during the reunion is just... realistic. i like her. 7/10
3rd. jake. don't get me wrong, i love the guy, i really do, but waiting 46 days to say something? 46?? when we had just been through cherrygate?? nah my guy, i need you to know what you want, and fast. yes, he's very hot and a chef, which adds 6 points for me, but waiting that long??? nope! still, better than levi. 8/10.
2nd. talia. she's the best li on season 1 in my opinion, and that's all because of her personality. her appearance is a damn nice bonus. she doesn't let anyone get away with lying/pretending, can't stand the bullshit and will call people on their bluff. besides, there's a tender side of her that she only shows with mc, and she's flirty at times and it's the most fun you have during her route. also, her, as a whole. 9/10.
1st. rohan. HE JUST DOES IT FOR ME OK??? after that first impression, and just how sweet and flirty he is, i can't just NOT be angry about the fact that he wasn't an li during the season. it was such a waste! he's so caring, always worried about mc, always asking what he can do. granted, other people do it, but rohan is just so interesting, so fucking hot... his kissing scenes are the best, his story about the empty banner tattoo, just how much shit he goes through during the season. LIKE- my boy deserved better. 10/10.
~season 2~ there are too many li's in this season and we didn't need all of them le'ts be honest.
jakub. by a landslide, the worst. there's a bunch of reasons for me to dislike the guy, but the main one is just how messy he is. let's not count the quirks they added to him, just focus on the fact that he fucked someone on day 1 from casa amor, proceeded to dump her, get with someone else, make her believe he was gonna bring her, only to stay "loyal" to hope and pretend none of that happened. why does this guy has stans is beyond me. -15/10.
lottie. here's why. she's a damn hypocrite and self righteous, always butting in people's business, never owning up to what she does. i only include her in my answers because i indulge the people that follow me, otherwise you would never see her name in my blog. physically? HOT. as a person? HOT MESS. -10/10
hannah. the lack of maturity really turns me off. she was way better on days 1-3 because she was being herself. the cringiest thing i can think for someone to do is to fake their confidence and pretend they're fine when they're CLEARLY NOT. if you know you're the shit you don't have to announce it, people know it. -5/10
felix. HE'S ANNOYING. -2/10
elijah. they made him continuously flirt with chelsea behind mc's back. then again, casa guys, because of the inconsistencies, will be rated low in this list. we are talking about game personality, not headcanons and such. 3/10
priya. she's immature as fuck. hot? yes. messy? unfortunately YES. i can't help but think about the way she threw the PRIVATE CHAT noah had with her on hope's face, in front of everybody. that really turned me off a lot. it's all besides the things she had done before, like operation, slime challenge... i don't know man, i want to believe she matured but... meh. yes, the hottest girl, physically, but not the best female li by a long shot. not even close. 4/10
kassam. i like him, i really do, but i prefer the 'constructed by headcanons" version i have of him. realistically there's not a lot to go from, the game didn't give us nearly enough. they did all the casa guys dirty, and particularly my favorites: kassam, arjun and carl. we get glimpses of who he is, what he does/likes, but to me it wasn't enough. also, kassam is not my type if we're talking body. 5/10
arjun. HE'S JUST SO DAMN HOT, physically, but the yoga story? oof, that was rough. granted, i do like his chat, particularly the one we have during brunch. if you go along with his goofiness, there's so much hidden below that mustache... but still, afterwards, just like the others, he becomes the same person as the og's. in my opinion, top 3 anime betrayals of all time, he also deserved better. appearance? 10/10. route/personality? 5/10
carl. aaaaaaaah. i have a multichapter post-villa story for him and still, he's gonna be pretty low in my list. WHERE'S THE ORIGINAL STORYLINE? WHERE'S THE COMMITMENT ISSUES BEING WORKED ON? WHERE IS THE WORKAHOLIC ANXIETY BECAUSE HE'S WORRIED ABOUT HIS COMPANY?? 6/10.
marisol. eh. it's complicated for me to talk about her because i don't really... care for her as an li. not because of her, but because of her route. as a person? i wish she was more confident in her choices. she says that graham trying to make her jealous is a bit childish but isn't that what she's doing by bringing him back? fusebox just really fucked marisol up and i hate them for it. appearance? 12/10, i think she's so damn hot, but overall? meh, 6.5/10.
bobby. yeah, yeah, i know, you love him. good for you. i can't stand impressions, and that's like 80% of his sense of humor. i think bobby, as an li, is fine. there wasn't anything thrilling in his route so his looks don't really matter to me. i find him cute and dependable, but i don't think cute does it for me. i like troubled people, you know? going through some shit, discovering things about themselves, growing, maturing, the whole thing. bobby is really an interesting guy, and he's really cute, i just don't find him appealing enough to make me fan myself. plus, he gets away with operation rather quickly and i don't... HMMMMM, i don't know... seems like there was a lot of double standards going on, you know? he doesn't make my heart race and at the end of the day, that's what attraction really means to me. as a person? 10/10. looks? 10/10. overall? 7/10.
noah. ah, my guy, shit or get off the pot. i do find noah EXTREMELY attractive, partially because of his looks, but also that warm personality and the way he talks about everything. to me he's fucking dreamy, absolutely tender and endearing, accidentally funny, and really sexy. i love him, i do, BUT the indecision my guy, holy shit. that takes away so much of the person he actually is. looks? 100/10. those eyes are sooo fucking hot! like, him, as a whole, holy shit. i reckon someone like him is the type of person that go viral every five years or so on facebook, and everyone is fainting when seeing him. that's how GOOD he looks. but like... not making up his mind? really drops the heart rate for me. 8/10.
rahim. fucking boy really got every single stan on their toes during the season, didn't he? NO ONE SAW THAT SHANNON FOOTAGE COMING. he was already really hot and gorgeous, but after he brought shannon, then dumped her for jo? THE AUDACITY?? 10 times hotter. he really said "oh, you think i'm harmelss? alright. watch me." i was like "alright, boy, pop off. do your thing. i'm gonna steal you anyway." and i did. and you know what? no regrets! i love his route from the beginning, i love his personality, i love his looks, i just wished they gave him a better night outfit, but that's not his fault. ibrahim to me is the second most underrated li in the game, and the fact that he can solve the rubik's cube, blindfolded, while doing crunches? BITCH, HE DOESN'T GET ENOUGH CREDIT. just for that, he should've been received by a red carpet made of panties. he's a solid 9/10 for me on every topic and 10/10 on looks.
elisa. now listen, disregard the "gossip sneezer" hiccup, elisa is not only accomplished being so young, she's unapologetic about her opinions, HELLA SMART, hard working, extremely sexy and just overall really attractive to me. here's the thing, they really tried to make us hate her because of the whole ordeal, but do you remember how sweet she is when she's trying to hide the fact that she's into mc? she's all clumsy, talkative, stuttering. she doesn't know where to look or what to do. i love that. she's super confident in herself but she kind of loses the floor when she sees mc, and i don't think there's anything cuter than that. i'm rating her high because she knows what she wants and she goes and fucking gets it, but not before going through an anxiety spiral and having to calm herself down. RELATABLE. the fact that she's so nervous, and really waits around for mc, is fucking cute. i like her, like i genuinely like her. she's not my type because i usually prefer thiccccccc, but she's still one of my favorites, and i wished her route was a bit longer. sneaking around with her, before we get a chance to couple up, is also really sweet. she gives a lot of reassurance, way more than other li's ever do. solid 10/10
henrik. i have the softest spot for him. i didn't care for him at first, not gonna lie. to me he was really goofy and just... too much. like, high energy. but after a couple of times just noticing what he was saying, the way he talked about love, connections, people in general? i was hooked. i love him, i really do. there's just so much tenderness to go around, he's so thoughtful and sweet, besides being quite quirky, but in a way that doesn't come across as trying hard. he's humble, smart, hot, cute, warm. i just really don't understand why he doesn't have more stans. yes, he brings blake back, but the imagery of him running towards mc, flipping his hair on jakub's face is just... ideal. he's a puppy, the good kind, and soft and unintentionally funny. AND HE HAS LONG HAIR. 10/10
gary. he's corny at times, but he has a good heart. i think he's funny without trying, has no shame in asking for a cuddle, is super massive body wise, which i honestly find so attractive. i could do without the brows but we make it work. besides that, he's a really simple guy, in a way that he doesn't need much to be satisfied. not everyone needs to be awarded or celebrated, and he gets it. he understand that he doesn't need to go long lengths to feel confident and appreciated. he just wants to live a nice life with a girl, have some kids, work, see his friends, his family. gary just wants to be happy and that comes through his route multiple times. besides all that, as a person who was invested in mc, he's charming as fuck. like- he just knows what to say and when to say it. i like his intimate scenes more than some of the li's combined. his looks, personality, storyline, dialogues, thunder thighs, tiddies. he's a solid 11/10 for me.
lucas. are we surprised? he's the most attractive because of everything that comes out of his mouth, and how. he's just out here, looking at us while we talk, giving smirks and fucking eyes, not caring if he makes us flush/feel warm. to him the more the better. he knows what to say, when to say it, how to say it and you know what? i can't help but loving him. he wants his freedom, he travels, he enjoys life but also wants to take care of the next one. he cares about the things that i care about, which is being a good person, learning how to be better, enjoying the opportunities that come, not give a shit about what people think. he's living his best life and it doesn't matter if he's villa! or returning!. i love that for him. and not to mention, i do think he's the hottest guy in all seasons. he doesn't wait around to give his opinion but he's not giving it if no one asks him, he's self aware. and despite being all that, he's still vulnerable at times, very noticeable when he feels a bit lonely, and yes he made mistakes, but everyone did. lucas is just the most attractive because he's authentic, unapologetic and fucking hot as hell. solid 12/10.
ugh, now... season 3. i genuinely hate the season it was too short i was bored and the only good thing to come out of it besides tai was... wait, there wasn't any. besides, say what you want, the li's weren't as interesting and the fandom is doing fusebox' job with headcanons and fanfics. don't be angry at me for telling as it is.
bill. AWFUL DESIGN. this one, indeed, is butt ugly. bill stans, if you find a faceclaim that DOESN'T look like the most ordinary fucking man you've ever seen, i'm sorry, that faceclaim does not apply. the guy has absolutely nothing going for him. no looks, no interesting personality, disgusting mayo talk, and he's kind of a douche. he might be RIGHT THERE with jakub for me, not gonna lie. actually, he's in the very bottom with jakub and dylan from s4. hate the guy.
ciaran. oh my god, just shut up about ireland and dogs already. here's the thing, ginger man are ATTRACTIVE to me, but where's the rest?? they did him really dirty and if he was supposed to only get a personality on boat party (if he ever got one) i didn't have the patience to wait for it. it's kind of like "you have to keep watching this show, it gets really good on episode three." I DON'T HAVE TIME OR ABILITY TO FOCUS FOR THAT LONG, DUDE, GIVE ME THE GOOD STUFF RIGHT AWAY OR PERISH, and that's ciaran for me.
rafi. meh. i do like his looks a lot, even though i feel they chose to make rafi as far from arabic as possible (as a person of color, who's a product of many ethinicities fucking each other, i know how that sounds. and i know egyptian people can look like a lot of ethnicities because mixing and all that, but i feel just a LITTLE BIT of apprehension from the company regarding his looks, and i can't stop thinking about it ok??? it's like this my guy, if rafi looked more like arjun and less like himself, would fusebox give him a butt storyline? MOST LIKELY. that's the thing. i feel they would've given him a really bad characterization, maybe even a harmful stereotype if he looked "more arabic" it's what i'm saying, but that's a conversation for another post). regardless of that, rafi is hot, yes, but he talks about his brother once, and then presses the "douchey actor button" on him and becomes a stereotype. i can't, y'all, i hate it.
camilo. OH MY GOD. they dismissed nicky as an li for these dudes? bill, ciaran, rafi, camilo? it's a no from me dog. camilo calling mc mamacita told me everything i needed to know: they were catering to clueless people that aren't latinx/hispanic/spanish and you can't change my mind. 'mamacita' is cringe as fuck. "ah, vena, that's not his entire personality." what is then? can you give me his character sheet? 'cause fusebox certainly didn't.
lily. MEH. next.
aj. SHE'S ADORABLE, don't get me wrong, but i've said many times before, i can't be attracted to her. i don't know why, i just can't. maybe it's how much energy she has and i couldn't keep up even if i tried...? maybe it's because she looks a bit... what's the word i'm looking for? GULLIBLE. that's what it is, she looks gullible. not dumb nor ignorant, just a bit too innocent. as an li? not interested. but i can say aj is objectively really beautiful and hot, i'm just not attracted to her. i feel protective over her.
yasmin. hot and a musician, and they still managed to not give her enough lines to save her life. during the season i noticed she barely had any screen time if she wasn't the li. granted, when she was, that stayed true too. not her fault, the game's. she had the most potential with me because guess the fuck what?? I LOVE CUTE GIRLS THAT ARE MUSICIANS, WHO DOESN'T?? but the lack of everything, the lack of time, of dialogues, back story, the detailing... i need more.
harry. here's the thing. the whole anger management thing was a very interesting storyline. did they do anything with it? no. did they ever touch the subject again? once, brushing it off rather quickly. do i think harry is hot? NOT IN THE SLIGHTEST. he looks so young to me! like... not young like some asian actors and singers do, no! he looks 14-16 to me, and that's the biggest "it's a no from me dog" ever. there's no fucking way i could ever think of him that way.
tai. COME ON, YOU KNEW THE RANKING OF SEASON 3. it had to be tai, he's borderline perfect to me. from design to personality. granted he didn't have any... twists in his storyline, BUT, his charm makes up for a lot of the mistakes they made in the season (in his route, that is, let's not get it twisted, i have no idea how much screentime he has out of it). tai is really about the personality they gave him, the one we can capture during the season, because DON'T GET ME STARTED ON BOAT PARTY. i don't know what that was and i pretend it never existed.
season 4. *insert disgust sound here*
read my words: NAJUMA, WILL, CORA, ANGIE, THABI, VALENTINA AND OLIVER FOR THE WIN. i don't even know who's a li besides najuma, will, angie and oliver to be honest, but i don't care.
kobi and james look so boring to me it hurts. none of the other men look remotely interesting, pretty, cute, handsome or hot. none of them have awaken anything in me that wasn't anger about their designs, which i hate with a burning passion.
i didn't play season 4 but i'm sleeping TIGHT knowing fully well i didn't waste my precious time.
i don't need to eat chocolate with pork to know it's gonna taste like the devil's anus, so for that reason, i have zero intentions of playing it. unless i can profit from it somehow, but until then, it's another no.
and those are my ratings.
NOW, if i could do a top 10, and choose just based off looks, this is my list, in whatever order because they could all rail me into oblivion:
lucas
gary
priya
tai
oliver
najuma
jake
noah
will
henrik
didn't mean to go in so deep but... rankings are hard for folks like me. everything counts and i can't objectively just say "hey, this person is hot" without knowing anything about them.
recognizing aesthetics? sure, but that's not what attraction means to me.
and this is not even counting people that weren't li's, 'cause you know shannon and hope would be part of this list, along with sammi (s1), seb, genevieve, elladine and nicky on s3, and possibly some people from s4 that i'm not sure if were li's.
alright, enough blabbering! those are my rankings jay lol
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MY FAVOURITE CHARACTERS FROM VARIOUS DIFFERENT MEDIA
and the reasons why i like them
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JOJO'S BIZARRE ADVENTURE
Noriaki Kakyoin - I just think he's neat
Risotto Nero - he's emo
Kars - HE'S HOT!!!!
Joseph Joestar - goofy as fuck
Josuke Higashikata - he's so silly it's unreal
Leone Abbacchio - depressed alcoholic? that's a favourite character right there
Caesar Zeppeli - I like him :]
Pannacotta Fugo - I think he's an interesting character (also because of phf)
Robert E.O Speedwagon - waifu
Diavolo - pathetic little bitch
Vinegar Doppio - pathetic little meow meow
Guido Mista - he's pretty chill, I like him
Ghiaccio - fuck dude why do I like all the angry ones
N'doul - i saw him and immediately liked him
Narciso Anasui - i could fix him.
Enrico Pucci - birthing hips
Okuyasu Nijimura - love me a dumb bitch
Rohan Kishibe - cunty
Foo Fighters - water
Hot Pants - please step on me
Diego Brando - DINOSAUR!!!
Johnny Joestar - he was really well written! also he looks like a twink
Yasuho Hirose - silly!!!
Josuke Higashikata8 - silly!!!
Santana - silly!!!
Wamuu - big man tits
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SCOTT PILGRIM
Matthew Patel - pathetic little emo (my favourite breed of man)
Scott Pilgrim - pathetic simp (me too)
Ramona Flowers - please step on me
Lucas Lee - himbo
Knives Chau - Silly!!!
Wallace Wells - he's an icon
Young Neil - Silly!!!
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STARDEW VALLEY
Sebastian - emo
Elliot - he has nice hair
Abigail - slay queen
Sam - silly!!!
Shane - depressed alcoholic
Krobus - silly!!!
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OURAN HIGHSCHOOL HOST CLUB
Tamaki Suoh - stupid blond bitch
Haruhi Fujioka - you go girl
Honey - cutie patootie
Mori - love me a good silent type
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CHAINSAW MAN
Denji - he's so relatable (i want to touch tits too)
Power - CAT LOVER
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UNDERTALE + DELTARUNE
Kris - non binary icon
Suzie - lesbian icon
Ralsei - icon
sans - haha funny skeleton guy
Papyrus - autistic icon
Flower - the flower
Toriel - love her
Alphys - lesbian icon
Undyne - lesbian icon
Mettaton - gay icon
Grillby - he's HOT (get it?)
Queen - feel like a fem queen
Lancer - an icon
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POKEMON
Ingo - haha funny train man with no memories
Emmet - haha funny train man
Pierce - emo
Raihan - silly!!!
Leon - silly!!!
Hop - silly!!!
Arven - :(
Melli - stuck up bitch
Adaman - "bisexuals are gonna love this guy"
Irida - silly!!!
Brock - simp
Allister - silly!!!
Jessie - girlboss
James - crossdressing icon
N - long hair
Volo - i HATED this guy at first, then thought "nvm he's cool"
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OMORI
Kel - silly!!!
Aubrey - auby
Hero - slay king
Mari - yippee!!!
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DIALTOWN
Randy Jade - pathetic
Phonegingi - GET THE FUCK OFF MY PORCH
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DAYSHIFT AT FREDDY'S
Dave - vegas
Jack - i like him
Dee - you go girl
Roger - baby
Harry - i like him
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FIVE NIGHTS AT FREDDY'S
Glamrock freddy - way to go superstar
Funtime Freddy - same va as diavolo
Michael Afton - Michael Afton
William Afton - JUST FUCKING DIE ALREADY
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WELCOME TO DEMON SCHOOL! IRUMA-KUN
Alice Asmodeus - gay icon
Clara Valac - silly!!!
Ameri Azazel - girlboss
Opera - non binary icon
Kalego Naberius - emo
Sabro Sabnock - HE'S GOT SO MUCH CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT IT'S GREAT
Lied Shax - silly!!!
Shichiro Balam - gentle giant
General Furfur - same english va as diavolo
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