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tightly
“Here. Do you want my jacket?”
Gon tries to speak quietly.
Killua sits up slowly with a cute whine, rubbing his eyes and staring at the fire, his big blues glazed over.
It’s adorable.
#;windy’s stuff#hxh#gonkillu#Gon#killua#hunter x hunter#gon x killua#KI IS SO CUTE IM GONNA DIE 😭😭😭😭😭😭🥺🥺🥺🤧#MOST PRECIOUS BABEY EVER ON MY WAY TO DO THE MOST TERRIBLE THINGS TO HIS FAM#HE IS SO PRECIOUS AND SWEET#RUBBING HIS CUTE LITTLE EYES AHHHHHH CUTE LITTLE TIRED KI SUCKING HIS THUMB WAHHH 😭😭 C-CUTE#LITTLE PRECIOUS BABEY#AHNNNNNN EATS MY PHONE THROWS SOMETHING ACROSS THE ROOM#IM EMOTIONAL I LOVE KI SO MUCH WAHHH#GOODBYE WORLD#I LITERALLY CANNOT AHHHHHH THE IMAGE IS IN MY HEAD#CUTE WITTLE BABEY KI SLEEPING SO SOUNDLY WAHHH#SHY LITTLE CUTE KI 🥺🥺🥺🤧🤧🤧🤧#WHY YES I DID NEED TO DO KI ASKING GON TO PICK HIM UP AGAIN IS THE CUTEST THING#BUT KI TEARING UP SO CUTELY HES MOST PRECIOUS AND CUTE BUT IT HURTS SO MUCH AHHHH WAHHH#KI IS SO CUTE TINY LITTLE FISTS IM 🥺🥺🥺🥺
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For the character bingo: Griffith, Farnese, The Fool, aaaand your favourite Eyeshield 21 character, whoever that may be.
<3 <3 <3 tyyy for the ask! most of which I will putting under a cut because this is quite long lol so GRIFFITH:
Oh were to start <3
Griffith is such a wonderful character who's been living rent free in my brain for the past? Several years?? But I also haven't encountered a character who incites quite so much vitriolic hatred like he does, especially considering that he's written to be quite sympathetic imo. The amount of terrible takes out in the wild web is bonkers, thus the 'everyone but me (and my friends) are wrong about him' and 'done dirty by the fans'. Regarding being done dirty by the creators, that's still up in the air-- depends on how his arc ends. But seeing as the whole moonbaby thing uh exists, I think my choice is valid.
I love Griffith and Guts equally, in large part because of the way they orbit one another, so they both work better as a dynamic (which each other <3) and he's one of the two best characters in the work imo. There's so much wrong with this boy, but I'm adamant that he's never done anything wrong ever in his life, and this opinion really IS like swinging a bat at a hornet's nest lmfaooo. Fight me about it!!
That being said though, in large part because of his Issues™ and Actions™, no I would not want to meet him irl. Even if the eclipse didn't happen, he's just too intense and messy man, I don't wanna deal with that. I just wanna watch and poke him from afar.
FARNESE
Farense is one of those characters where I really like her potential as a character, but I'm largely disappointed with how she turned out lol. I think her initial character traits were really fascinating, and quite unique! Plus her complicated relationships with her half brother is also really frought with tension, but then halfway through her personality basically does a 180 and all the things that were interesting about her mostly up and disappear. AND, so far anyway, the issues between her and Serpico have just been left hanging. So yeah, loved when there was something deeply wrong with her, and never want to meet her because of it, so I like the version of her that I wish she had been.
THE FOOL
It's them!! I love the Fool (or Beloved, his true name), he is so precious. He is put through so much shit, though that isn't the reason why I think he was done dirty (well, not the only reason). That's for lack of follow through with FitzFool as a ship lmfaooo I just wanted them to be happy together and I was so mad to learn that doesn't actually really happen. I would love to see the Fool in every book in the series, and to be more prominant in the ones that he IS in because he's great and that's that. And he really DID nothing wrong ever in his life, and I'm not even being all that tongue and cheek about it lol. Usually characters who are just Good™ can be a bit boring, but he's just such an endearing mix of mischevious, mysterious, and genuinely kind, that I can't help but love him.
EYESHIELD 21 CHARACTER: HIRUMA
YA-HA BABEY!
I've been rereading es21 lately and ugh, I love him your honor. He's kind of a strange character to describe, because in a lot of ways he starts off less as a character and more just this narrative force of nature that exists to make crazy, badass things happen since our protagonist is like, the meekist of meek in personality, and nothing would happen if it was left up to him lol. But as the series progresses you do see glimpses of his humanity, and he loves football!! and his friends!! And he's just UGH so over the top but so relatable and inspiring? Weird combo but there it is.
But yeah he is a difficult character to capture I think, because bluffing is like breathing to him and he's also at least half a loonytoons character. (He and Bugs Bunny should really hang out) So while I have definitely seen good depictions of him in fic and art and stuff, I also see looootsss of stuff where I'm like 'he would NOT say/do that' hfhfh. Plus I have specific hc's about him that I'm pretty adamant about. Also he's the fandom bicycle, and I think the ships are all fairly valid, but the really popular ones are the ones that I actively don't ship so.
He is such a fun character, but I would hate to meet him in real life because he'd probably blackmail me into doing menial jobs for him with no reward soooooo that is also why there are many things wrong with him lol. He's the kind of character that works because the story he's in is also really over the top-- if you met him in real life, he'd just be in jail.
#Griffith#Farnese#The Fool#Hiruma#Berserk#RotE#es21#marley manson#thanks for the ask moth!!#it was fun to ramble about some characters lol
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OPTION TWO: KING OF ATTOLIA: THE HIT BROADWAY MUSICAL (and this idea is mine so it’s a looooooong one warning you now)
WE OPEN with a huge ensemble cast song of heckin course in which all of Attolia COMPLAINS about this HUGE PAIN in their COLLECTIVE BUTTS, telling the story of how the thief of eddis DECEITFULLY and WRONGLY kidNAPPED their prECIOUS QUEEN who may have been bloodthirsty and barbaric but who careS she was ouR queen and she’s beAUTIFUL and we loVE her and we hATE the king who forCED her to marry him bOO to the king doWN with the king we hATE him he’s TERRIBLE and the song ends with Aris comes sprinting on stage, disrupting all the singers and sending the song to a skittering halt bc guys!!!!
Costis punched the king!!!
To which there is suddenly a lot of Whispered Talking about oh nO costis is so niCE and now he’s gonna diE bc he punCHED the kinG also what did the king do this time--inSULTed teleus no heckin wonDER costis punched him but still v tragic cut to scene 2 Costis in his cell, pacing, sitting, standing, pacing again, and there’s a knock at the door. It’s the king of attolia, approaching from Stage Right, a bottle of wine tucked under his arm and two cups in his one visible hand. Costis lets him in. The king sets the wine on the table. He lifts his right hand--no. It’s a hook, the audience can see for the first time. The King of Attolia is missing his right hand.
The song neglected to mention that. There’s lots these songs neglect to mention plot twist Nobody talks about How the King lost that Hand it is a Forbidden Topic
There is no song when the king tells costis he’s being promoted, only a stuff uncomfortable silence whenever the king is not speaking. Toward the end of the scene in strides Attolia asking if Attolis has decided whether to hang costis or behead him. Attolis answers neither, costis will be promoted, and Attolia makes a noise of disgust and leaves.
A few songs follow as Costis settles into his new position and since this whole narrative is filtered through his eyes, the audience is lead to believe all the things about attolis from the first song are true. He dresses like a peacock, he has no dignity, he’s spiteful with his servants, he makes costis do stupid things. The queen pulls Costis aside and asks him to Keep an Eye on the King for her, to report back to her occasionally. He assumes the queen will one day do away with this idiot king and he is surprisingly conflicted about that. He gets his I Want song, which is mostly just “I Want This Stupid King To Leave Me Alone” lol.
Another important note: One of the songs is a council song that’s v political and it’s mainly during this song that we learn 1) the king is a v good singer so what was the deal with people complaining about his voice/speech/accent in that first song, and 2) Oh, that’s it, the king can’t rhyme. Attolian formal speech (sung, in this case bc Holy Musical Batman) is traditional broadway style meter and end rhyme. Eddisian formal speech has internal rhyme, has specific meters and important in-meter repetition, but no end rhyme. When Attolis sings, he Never rhymes, although you can see him Trying, actively trying so hard and only getting as far as slant rhyme which makes everyone involved Wince terribly bc Ugh That Accent, This Stupid Backward Eddisian Goat. Attolis and Attolia as of yet have no duet, but they meet in hallways sometimes and greet each other in song and it’s awkward and weighted and Short. Attolis has a lovely I Want song in which he locks all of his attendants out of his room and sings to himself (while costis is Right There, Sir) how homesick he is, and how much he misses Eddis and his freedom. It’s v sad. Attolia also has a solo during the council scene, which is also short, her time is coming i swear
THE KING’S WEDDING NIGHT is a bawdy awful song and an Absolute Bop and dite is terribly proud of himself and everyone’s humming it on and off for the rest of the act. It makes gen horrifically mopey which makes costis’ head hurt but the king is starting to grow on him. like a fungus. after all he sang that really sad song about how much This Sucks and yeah, fair, everybody’s putting stuff in his food and bed and crap and Maybe if we were Nicer to him he wouldn’t seem so Awful (all of the guards make fun of him for this). There is a short “lilies i rule, heads you do” scene that takes place during another short council scene right before The Dinner of the Fateful Dance, and during that council scene Attolis doesn’t even Try to Rhyme and people keep interrupting the council song to hum The King’s Wedding Night and he gets visibly more and more agitated as the coin keeps flipping and the song keeps playing and he leaves in a huff. Attolia tells him as he stalks off that he Has to attend dinner and during dinner he Forces (!!!) the queen to dance with him to a lovely instrumental song, which seems to play first in slow motion while Phriesine sings of Attolia’s backstory, of her first marriage, of the importance of the king’s humor when the queen offers him her wine. Suddenly the song speeds up, and the queen’s hair tumbles past her shoulders, and she’s smiling, why is she smiling? Costis blinks as the king gives her back her hair pins. That was certainly telling, but only if you’re paying attention.
Act One ends with Costis on his day off with a sense of unease, until he passes some guards who are struggling to put away the dogs and suddenly he knows! and he takes off running!!! bc where is the king!!!!!
Act Two opens with Costis desperately singing a prayer (Ten Golden Cups) as he runs and arriving in the garden just in time to see the king easily dispatch the second to last assassin. The third is apprehended as the rest of the court arrives, assuming Costis has done the deed. The assassin is questioned furiously with the king leaning against costis and he spits furious vitriol about the king, the same things everyone was singing about at the beginning but with more bitterness, and ends with “The queen should have kILLED you when she cUT OFF YOUR HAND!!!!” and if there are enough nonfans in the audience and if the actors are doing their job right it should feel like all the air has been sucked out of the room bc you don’t taLK about that!!! the queen arrives then and attolis kisses her and presses his forehead to her shoulder and suddenly everyone is rhyming as the royals are rushed up to the queen’s chambers. The king is put on a bed, spewing blood. The queen faints, the king is Distraught, everyone is shoved out of the room. Attolia is left alone with Costis outside the room and she Sings. It’s a short song, and mostly is Extremely Angery about the assassination attempt in her Own Garden in her Own Court to her Own King. When they’re let back in in the next scene it’s Duet Time Babey!!!!! Attolis and Attolia sing together about their relationship and their Love and their past and their present and how they’ve learned to step past it all and costis watches, feeling like an outsider but also So Stunned. He tells the king about the cups and the king swears they will be there
From here things start happening Very Quickly, It Seems. The king is ill. The queen is singing more often. The queen of eddis comes to visit, not just the king’s cousins as in the book. Unfortunately we have to cut out the part where sophos goes missing bc sophos can’t exist in this universe he adds too many variables we get one (1) storyline and we can’t mess this up. The king speaks with Relius and that’s Scary. There’s another ensemble song during which Costis is the only one to defend the king and he is Uncomfortable when the king’s wedding night motif plays again. And Then the king Destroys the house of Erondites and the queen has relius thrown in jail (also during that time the queen has a vicious, terrifying, short solo that’s more like a temper tantrum and a panic attack rolled into one and the king Soothes her) When the king is Destroying that baron’s house??
he rhymes.
Perfectly, flawlessly, he rhymes. He matches Attolian cadence note for note, word for word, and then he folds Eddisian repetition and internal rhyme into the mix. Attolia joins in, her own musical style rising up to meet his. The exchange lines, ending each other’s rhymes, Attolia ends up using more Eddisian themes than even he does. He proves he could do it all along, he just didn’t want to, and now he proves he doesn’t have to by ending that proclamation in a purely Eddisian way. And the next scene? Relius. Attolis. The dungeon. The King’s Wedding Night: Reprise. Perhaps the most terrifying reprise ever written. And in the end, he lets him go. And Relius returns to Attolia and once again begs her forgiveness and Attolia gets her own terrifying, heartbreaking solo, and in this one? she uses Eddisian cant and Attolis isn’t even in the room. She forgives him in a blend of Eddisian and Attolian that becomes it’s own musical language, and the only one used by the royals for the rest of the show.
Does that sound like the end? because it’s noT guess who haven’t had a duet yet!!!! it’s Attolis and Costis time!!!!! the attendants wake costis bc the king is drunk on a rooftop and he is supposed to Fetch the king. Costis learns to speak the language the king and queen have already been speaking to each other, and the king declares he has work for costis to do. And yeS the king slips, and tumbles, and falls--until it’s clear he can’t catch himself, his foot is off the parapet--and he flails and Something catches him, and pushes him gently back up, and a gentle rich chuckle fills the stage as the voice of a god says “go to bed, Eugenides.” Eugenides and Costis stare at each other, wide eyed, terrified. “The gods really do speak to you,” Costis whispers and Attolis confirms it and a Vow is made, “will you serve me and my gods for all your days?” In the end Costis agrees and asks him to come to sword practice tomorrow.
The final scene is fairly short, Attolis’ defeat of the guard and of Teleus and his being named Annux, and Attolia is there, and i actually am not sold on that as the actual ending, this scene could be moved before the rooftop or could be deleted altogether except we Need the annux line and i want attolia to be there ugh problems problems but either way the curtain closing song is an invocation of hephestia which, invocations should also feature bc i heckin love me an invocation song but that’s it that’s the play can u imagine these idiots singing in front of a live studio audience boy i die!!!!
#the queen's thief#king of attolia#now this one should def go under a read more it's at LEast a mile long#still not doing it#also if u want hit me up for lyrics i've been toying with them for Months but barely wrote them down so good luck if i remember them lol
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Ramble about the Hisoka&Chikage dynamic (w/ spoilers for the two Winter Play Events and chapter 5) and more personal stuff under the cut
Either way the thing i found really cruel with the Chikage arc is that, Hisoka was already on top of my fav list, but since he was amnesic he wasn’t defined by much aside from “his amnesia most likely come from his trauma”, and learning that he has a guilt complex/is responsible for someone’s death and it’s likely that this death is what triggered the amnesia, and that’s it.
and i thought i was safe with that bc What Could Go Wrong meanwhile i could relate on being a Sleepy Bitch like Hisoka (hell i used to be able to sleep ANYWHERE before and often fell asleep in class or in a corner on trip, before anxiety indulced Insomnia started to kick my ass.) and i have memories issue, trauma babey, so like, My Kin Now:tm: (i have more reasons but that’s the funny short version)
but then the Winter Chapter ended with the April’s cliffhanger and the thing is that i was aware of Chikage’s cards and i knew of that one card from the “past self” set which was matching with Hisoka, so it was obvious that Chikage=April and that Chikage and Hisoka both were spies
and it fucked me up and from all the rookies’s build ups from the events it’s Chikage’s that fucked me up the most bc he specifically appears in Winter chapter, makes it clear he’s lurking on Hisoka LIKE THIS IS CHIKAGE’S FIRST APPEARANCE
IS WHEN TASUKU PICKS UP HISOKA AFTER HE COLLAPSES.. AND NOW WE KNOW IT WAS CHIKAGE’S ROLE..... HE LITTERALLY SLIDES ON SCREEN TO DECIDE TO TAKE ACTION ON HISOKA WHILE SEEING SOMEONE FILLING HIS ROLE OF CARETAKER OF HISOKA.....
And then Chikage leaves Hisoka flowers saying it “means a lot to him” to send those flowers and considering the whole Flower Language in the game it had to be on purpose so i checked up the flowers he sent Hisoka and i’m a crying mess
Second Winter Play:
(red pre chap 5, green post chap 5)
Third Winter Play:
and i’m a messssss because while the first one can have resentment in it it also showcase the specific grief Chikage denied himself to feel??? even the grief he felt FOR Hisoka. But the second one is so positive and hopeful like Chikage doesn’t WANT to turn on Hisoka like he planned and i’m a fucking disaster.
COUGHS anyway i got lost but, the thing is that, the fact the direction they took with the complex relationship between the three siblings is. The sort of sibling relationship i connect with because this is closer to what i can relate.
it is a similar reason why i’m fascinated with the Wales brothers in gbf, with the fact the youngest brother had to bear the burden of his older brother disappearing and his other brother going off rails and taking it out on him, before being torn by guilt and realizing he ought to make it up to his brother.
And if you boil down the Hisoka/Chikage/August storyline it’s the same thing happening, except Chikage specifically BLAMED Hisoka for August’s death, and Hisoka felt guilty and responsible and beared that burden.
And honestly i already connect much more with sibling dynamics when the youngest of the bunch is bearing the burden of their dynamic bc, mood.
But, as someone who had my eldest sister ran away from home when i was a kid and my other sister turning on me and pushing me away because, as she told me ways later, she badly lived the abandon and she knew i was closer to my eldest sister so she pushed me away in a form of jealousy AND the fact we were not allowed to talk about my runaway sister, we had to act like she never existed, and it was extremely frustrating so my sister shifted the blame on me
bc Chikage was always a bit jealous of how close Hisoka and August were and then when August died, with the inability to process his grief, he had to blame Hisoka.
And like, if the Wales Brothers’ dynamic punched me in the face, this was a suckerpunch because bro that hit, ways too close from home??? on a character i already kinda can project on?? (even though my behavior and coping mechanisms are closer to Azuma bc of the shared Abandon Issues and all but man it’s not like i had nothing on Hisoka yaknow?)
And, meanwhile, Hisoka and Chikage fixed their relationship. They opened up about their trauma, they cleared it up, they decided to heal together and getting better, and this is something that’s fucking me up a LOT because... it’s not something i can have? My sister and I shared our trauma but we’re still so distant and so caught in our parents’s bullshit that my sister KEEPS shifting the blame on me for anything going wrong with our family, especially lately with our dad.
It was something that made me irrationally emotional with the Wales bro already but here destroys me, the fantasy of /fixing/ it. The fantasy of, after this hardship, managing to realize they can rely on one another and be there through their trauma. And, for Hisoka and Chikage, this desire to rebuild their family, in a less toxic environment. It’s something i can’t have, and don’t even really /want/ because the relationship with my sister is too damaged and we’re too different as people, but the fantasy of it being a possibility somewhere makes me weak on my knees.
(+ tbh a3 is HEALING bc with the Wales bro, the youngest is still the most responsible one, he still has to carry this burden, he has so much on his shoulders, and it’s... heavy when you get to project a bit on his story. While Hisoka is, on the contrary, encouraged to rest in order to recover. He’s encouraged to keep sleeping, to do stuff he likes, to nurse himself back to health, and this is so HEALING to have to see the characters who’s trauma you relate to being told that they don’t have to just “carry on” but, that they can be safe to rest now. (likewise with Azuma who’s also encouraged to rest and take care and rely on others without being punished about pushing people away. Instead it’s his friends picking up how to read him to counter Azuma’s first instict that is to isolate himself, without lecturing him about how he shouldn’t do that.), a3′s way to tackle trauma and recovery is seriously getting to me SO BAD like, it’s really healing to me)
Adding to that that, independantly to it all, I genuinely adore Chikage, he’s fun, he’s sneaky, he’s an ass, but he cares so much, and everything is because he cares ways too much, he’s so damaged and was never allowed to have room to get better and now he does, and he built so much walls around himself, his lies are just that (i’ve seen someone call it gas//l//ighting and DEAR LORD learn the meaning of words he doesn’t do that AT ALL) he just lies to throw off people, he tells people right away that he lies, even when it would protect him to keep on the charade (see his lie to Sakyo to cover up when he kidnapped Izumi), they’re walls in order to keep people away, to keep them from asking about him, and like he says to Tsuzuru because there’s weakness to be exploited in the truth, which is a paranoia that is completely legit to have when he’s litterally an informant/hacker spy??
he’s completely different from my sister, which is ironic, but therefore i do not even manage to project this thing fully on him. Hell, i crush on Chikage. I have terrible taste but good lord he’s been appearing in my dreams every day lately what the fuck Chikage. (litterally my top 3 chara is just “1) Kin in regard to the lore, 2) Kin in the coping mechanism, 3) Crushing ways too hard on him, am a total simp”)
Also meanwhile the fact the whole ending is “we’re leaving the organization (which was their family), we have a found family now, but together” is peak fantasy for someone like me and i’m always crying over the Mankai Found Family, but just, going “screw the previous family”? but..... the two of them together? I’m a mess. Especially adding to the fact Hisoka got SO close to the Winter Troupe and with the course of the events it really shows how precious they became to one another, this found family remains so precious to Hisoka (hell he bothers Homare and Tasuku as much as he bothers Chikage dLKFJD) he just, wants Chikage to experience this happiness too instead of letting himself collapse under his trauma and i’m!!! aaaah!!
So yeah what i’m getting at is, that, I thought i would be safe from Hisoka’s arc, that i wouldn’t be this emotionally invested in it, i was already too emotionally invested in Azuma’s bc Azuma has my coping mechanisms, but instead the plot took me by the throat with the direct sibling dynamic i REALLY feel for, it hit WAYS too close from home, with a storyline i can HEAVILY empathize with, and feel pain for both Hisoka and Chikage because i get both sides so hard, and i HAD to fall for one of those morons.
I’ve been playing a3 for over a year, started playing when the EN server lautched, and i had been emotionally involved in all of it, a LOT, i’ve played it every day in over a year, i’m up to date with everything, i feel so much for it, but despite that i felt like i was keeping it mostly lowkey, like i wasnt /obsessed/
but this storyline ruined me. This storyline brought this lowkey obsession to highkey at full speed.
And all of that bc i genuinely loved Hisoka before those truthbombs, that those made me love him even more, that Chikage became SO loveable and has been living in my mind rentfree ever since, and that the dynamic they touch is both too close from home while also being unrealistic (as in how they fixed their dynamic), but in a “fantasy i love to indulge in” kind of unrealistic and it is destroying me.
so yeah, A3 good, i can’t get over how GOOD the writing is, but also that fucking wrecked me.
#i've been a mess for months now aaaaaa#ichatalks about a3#ichapersonal#(i'm talking about some of my family issues under the cut so DLKFJDLFK that's why the warning anyway)
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