#NOT SHITTING ON OTHER JAY DESIGN I LOVE THEM I JUST WANT FAT JAY WAS DRAWN MORE :C | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

4point7 · 4 years

Text

THWACK - A Negan One Shot

Summary: a load of words slung haphazardly together to create a modern masterpiece. Written for @negans-lucille-tblr 6K Roll The Dice Challenge using the prompt “ I'm a slave to your games. I'm just a sucker for pain “.

Characters: Negan x Reader (ft. Floral Wallpaper)

Rating: 18+ but maybe less than 98

Warnings: All the warnings. Don’t read this if you get offended by anything typically Negan. Floral Wallpaper.

Word Count: 1,963

Tick.

The sound of the clock echos through your mind. It suffocates your thoughts as it reminds you of the monotonous grind of time. Every "tick" amplified through the dark. The space between each one extending for eternity as the silence between them crashes through you like unrelenting waves on a crumbling cliff face, slowly beating away at your resilience. The rest of the community sleeps blissfully as you lay there, your consciousness unwavering.

Tick.

You roll on to your side and open your eyes, staring blankly at the wall. The floral wallpaper, once pristine, now peels away slightly at the seems, unveiling the illusion of perfection, breaking the once perfect pattern.

The luxuries of the past have long been abandoned. What's the point in keeping the inside looking nice any more? Compared to the horror that lies in the world beyond the mildew covered window of The Sanctuary, the room you're in, even in this state, IS luxury these days. You only need to see a couple of Walkers have their heads smashed in to be cleansed of material desires and become satisfied with basic needs being met.

Another tick of the clock calls an end to the time you're willing to designate to falling asleep. You sit up and swing your legs over the side of the bed, exposing them to the chill of the air that your bed sheets were protecting you from.

You feel the layer of dust and dirt on the soles of your feet as they connect with the cold floor. You reach to grab your clothes from the chair next to the bed and pull them on, taking the time to dust the debris from your feet before donning your boots.

You open the door, trying to muffle it's creak by pulling it softly and slowly away from the latch before stepping out into the hallway. You would rather not wake anyone. People would get suspicious if they saw someone walking The Sanctuary grounds in the early hours of the morning.

You make your way along the corridor to the door that leads outside and gently push it open. The cool breeze from outside washes over you, almost through you, as it breaks into the corridor. You take a deep breath, feeling the air fill your lungs, calming you, if just for a moment.

The door comes to a stop with a soft thud, fully revealing the early morning landscape. The trees and buildings in the distance consumed by a mist that spills onto the roads towards you.

As you step out, gravel crunching underfoot, a glint catches your eye. You follow it to its origin, finally laying your eyes on the steel barb wire coiled tightly around a baseball bat, like a snake wrapped tightly around a branch. It's doing no harm where it is but anger it and it will bite! Lucille, resting by the man himself, Negan.

You wonder if you can back away, sink back into the darkness of the doorway but it's too late, even though he isn't facing you, you know he knows you're there.

He stands, leaning on a barrier, his folded arms resting along it supporting the weight of his upper body, leather jacket taught across is broad back. Lucille stands propped against the barrier beside him, perfectly inanimate yet still so menacing. It's like the bat had a presence all of it's own, bringing fear to many while being nothing more than a prop to the horrors of it's master.

You have wanted to be this close to Negan for such a long time but now, in his presence, you freeze. Just standing there taking him in, feeling your heart thump harder in your chest, adrenaline surging through you.

"You just gonna stand there pissin' your pants or are you gonna join me?" His deep voice startles you for a moment, you weren't expecting him to speak. You walk over and lean on the barrier next to him, staring out into the mist.

You sense him turn to look at you but you don't dare look back. Not yet.

"So... who are you?" He says in a gentle deep drawl.

"I am Negan", you respond, now turning your head to look him, traces of a smirk lining your lips.

He chuckles and looks back to the landscape. "Holy shit balls, we got ourselves a joker!"

You don't take your eyes from him, taking in his profile. It's not until you're up-close like this that you can see his imperfections, the lines starting to creep across his skin, breaking the perfect appearance, reminding you of that floral wallpaper.

"What the fuck are you doing awake at this time, Comedian?"

"Can't sleep", you respond.

"Huh. No fuckin' shit!" He pauses for a beat and you say nothing. "Me either."

"Why?" You pry and he lets out a sigh.

"Could you fuckin' sleep if you had to do the shit that I do? Smashin' dead fuckers' heads don't make my prick hard, Joker! Smashin' livin' fuckers', even less so but some fuck's got to protect and lead this community. They haunt me. Every one of the cunts marchin', around my fuckin' thoughts like they're on parade. That's why."

It's an honesty you weren't expecting from him. You had always been sold this fearless, unfazed persona yet here before you stood a man troubled by the actions of his past. Almost broken. For a moment you let yourself pity him.

"Does nothing ever help distract your mind? Help you sleep?" You ask.

"Fuckin' my wives! At least, it used to. But knowing their just fuckin' me out of fear has started to take the shine off the pussy, if you know what I mean? Shit! I wanna slip my cock down the throat of a fucker who wants it, not just because they feel obliged. Then I might have the release I need". His hand slips down and gently caresses the handle of Lucille as if unconsciously.

You're so close to getting what you have wanted for a long time and you know you can get it if you play your cards right.

"WANT ME TO GIVE THE OLD CODGER A DAVID BLOWIE?", you exclaim.

"Oooh err, yes please, if that's okay with you, like? If you like don't mind and stuff and that?" He says back in a melancholy tone not far from how a school boy might ask for his ball back when he kicked it into his neighbours garden.

"You want to?"

"WANT TO? I'D FUCKING LOVE TO!" you whisper. "GIMME THAT WONDER WURST!"

You drop to your knees. Ouch! You think. You should have gotten down gently. Why the fuck you decided to drop so hard no one fucking knows.

You undo his pants revealing his big, flaccid whopper. "It's flaccid." You say. "Yes" he replies.

You stick out your tongue and touch the head of his penis with it as though your testing an ice lolly to see how cold it is. THWACK! His instant erection ploughs into your chin, essentially upper cutting you, and knocks you over. His meat looks like a big fat sausage that's about to explode. You get back to your knees and take his shaft in your hand. "Hey ho, here we go, yo!", you sing into his flesh stick like it's a microphone, before... boom! You slam that happy package right on down your gob hole! Your head smacking back and forth like your headbanging to a heavy metal track. Your throat is making noises like a fucking plunger making hard work out of a toilet or some shit. Like gluh, ung, gug, guh, glug, guh, guh, guh, gug, gluh, ug, ugh, glug... ... guh, gluh, uh, ugh. You had to stop in the middle there to take a little breath. You are human after all.

Anyway your smashing his trouser snake and shit and he fucking loves it and all that and he is like "yeah, yeah, ooh, fuckin' yeah" and shit. Drool is all puddling on the floor beneath you and all that and like splashing all over the place, you know. Like, step off Shamoo, people need to be careful of MY splash zone! And you like grab the shaft in one hand and the balls in the other and stuff and your like working it like that. Your tongue giving it the biggun on his nut balls. Like slip, slop, lollipop mother fucker. Better tongue action than a fucking ant eater. You pushing your tongue down his urethra and give a good old lick all up in there. Then you start slurping on that junk like a fucking kid trying to get the last of their slushy. And his eyes are popping out his head and shit and he's like "Holy shit balls, joker this is a damn acceptable level blow jay." And you like slap it on your forehead and shit and like maybe prod yourself in the eye with it a bit, I dunno. And you like slap it and he looks at you like "uh okay, I s’pose" and then you slap it again because fuck it. And back in the face opening it goes. Plunger noise returns. And he maybe grabs your hair or maybe not, maybe if you're into that and you're not but maybe you are. And he is all like, "I'm going to do a cum" and you're like "pardon?" And he's like "I'm going to do a cum" and you're like, "sorry what?" And he's like "I'm going to..." and you stop sucking and are like, "I'm so sorry, I can't hear you over the racket". He's like, "ever so sorry, I was just letting you know, I was going to do a bit of a cum" and you're like, "Right you are, Sonny Jim" and stick his whoopsie back in your cock pocket of a mouth. Then all of a sudden, without any warning whatsoever, *pew, pew* he does a bit of a cum in your throat making you gag. Then like a fucking fireman's house, white spaff juice sprays out of the end sending you flying backwards as he drenches you with his load. Like DRENCHES you. When he is done, you pull a hanky from your pocket and wipe the corners of your mouth. You have some class after all.

You get to your feet and walk back over to him, a twinkle in your pink eye.

"Thanks Joker, that was okay, I really fuckin' needed that".

You blush slightly and lean in for a kiss. As your faces connect you take his lip in between your teeth and hold it there. You hold it there until you feel it go slack in your grasp, until his eye's glaze over and then you pull out the knife you had plunged into his throat, his blood starting to gush over you. His body goes limp and falls to the floor with a thud. The vibration knocks Lucille from her perch and she falls across his slumped body. You wipe the blood from the knife on your shirt and place it back through your belt, behind your back. You had finally got what you had come for and you didn't care what it took to get it. You didn't fear the walking dead but you did fear what someone might do to you if they found you like this so you decide it best to head off. You step over Negan's lifeless body and start your walk home. After all, people will be waking up soon and it's a long walk back to Alexandria.

... oh yeah! You sing "I'm a slave to your games. I'm just a sucker for pain" as you walk off or something.

#bees6krollthedicechallenge #Negan Smut #Smut #Fan Fic #Walking Dead #Negan

62 notes · View notes

butterfly-on-my-love · 5 years

Text

Misfits Digimon AU!

No one asked.

I did this with the Creatures and the Derp Crew way way back so why not? I had images for those, so I might do some here but not now.

~Matt~

Partner: Falcomon Digivolution line: Puwamon-Pinamon-Falcomon-Peckmon-Crowmon-Ravemon-Ravemon Burst Mode Crest/Digi-Egg: Reliability

Matt met his perfect partner when a large black egg came out of his computer one late night. He had been editing the podcast, half asleep, and only really realized something was going on when the screen froze and turned whiter than an angel’s wings. The egg formed and appeared on his lap with a small device. He hadn’t been high or drunk, and was almost positive he was dreaming. It wasn’t until all the other guys, and some others online, had eggs, too. He made a joke about turning it into breakfast. “Think we can turn it into breakfast? How do you like your eggs, guys?” “I am not food!” A tiny voice had stated loudly. Angry little eyes on a brown tuft of fur glared up at Matt, then softened with joy. “I’m Puwamon, your partner!”

As Puwamon grew to Pinamon and then Falcomon, Matt learned to care for and love the creature. It wasn’t until Falcomon turned into Peckmon to save Matt that he realized just how much he cared for the ninja bird. Their bond only strengthened as they grew together.

~Jay~

Partner: Gatomon Digivolution line: SnowBotamon-Nyaromon-Salamon-Gatomon-Angewomon-Ophanimon/Mastemon (w/ BlackGatomon) Crest/Digi-Egg: Light

Jay’s partner transcended the regular Rookie stage, going to full Champion. Jay and Mason were the only two to have permanent Champion-level partners. They’re also the only two with partners that DNA digivolve to Mega level together. Jay fell in love with SnowBotamon from the start, especially knowing his best friend had the same Digimon. She only got cuter as she grew, eventually branching off from her sister and becoming a white angel. She and Jay sing together all the time. Like Jay and Mason, Gatomon and BlackGatomon tend to encourage each others’ antics.

~Mason~

Partner: BlackGatomon Digivolution line: SnowBotamon-Nyaromon-Salamon-BlackGatomon-LadyDevimon-Minervamon/Mastemon (w/ Gatomon) Crest/Digi-Egg: Hope

It’s no surprise that Jay’s partner and crest match perfectly, and they match him, but Mason didn’t think his matched at all. He had a black cat that turned into a lady demon, and his crest was Hope. How had he managed that? He wasn’t ever hopeful of shit. Okay, he was, secretly. The little black and purple creature was hopeful, too, but never showed it. They complimented each other perfectly, as they did with Jay and Gatomon. BlackGatomon was the brains to Mason’s brawn, helping him keep a level head and not run head first, stupidly, into danger, like he so often wanted to.

~Toby~

Partner: Lalamon Digivolution line: Nyokimon-Budmon-Lalamon-Sunflowmon-Lilamon-Rosemon-Rosemon Burst Mode Crest/Digi-Egg: Love “Fuck yeah! I get a sexy woman as my partner!” That’s the first thing Toby said as he faced almost certain death in a big fight. Lilamon rivaled LadyDevimon and Angewomon, but Rosemon’s appearance was Toby’s proudest moment. “I’m a proud mother.” He had commented after the fight was over. He and Lalamon are always out shopping together. He often gets her matching accessories. The two are always looking after the others, too.

~Cam~

Partner: Renamon Digivolution line: Relemon-Viximon-Renamon-Kyubimon-Taomon-Sakuyamon-Kuzuhamon Crest/Digi-Egg: Courage

Cam’s perfect partner was a fox, but one that was even taller than him. A small furball grew into a towering beast that he loved more than anything. He enjoyed when she moved to all fours in her Champrion form. He was taller than her again, but her ultimate form and mega form towered over him again. Her “extra-mile” evolution, Kuzuhamon, scared him at first. Had he been too prideful in her and made her dark digivolve? She had become almost scary with her dark color scheme, but she assured him that she could only achieve this form with his help. It was the best form she could turn into, and very few of her kind did.

~Swagger~

Partner: Kotemon Digivolution line: MetalKoromon-Kapurimon-Kotemon-Gladimon-Knightmon-Crusadermon Crest/Digi-Egg: Friendship

As the only member of the group to not have a partner with an “extra-step” in their evolution line, he was lucky enough to get a borderline God as his partner. Despite his pink coloring, Crusadermon identifies as a male that gives no fucks. “I am pink because it’s a cool color.” He always says when Toby asks and when Mason makes fun of him. He shuts shit down like Negan would, proving to Swagger that he is his perfect partner, through and through. It was cool to have a tiny little guy with a mask hiding his face and a stick to fight with. It was cooler to have a little fat knight, and even cooler still to have a bigger knight. Yet, Crusadermon took the cake in all his pink glory. It was like his childhood fantasy coming true.

~Bee~

Partner: FanBeemon Digivolution line: Pupumon-Puroromon-FanBeemon-Waspmon-CannonBeemon-TigerVespamon-Grademon Crest/Digi-Egg: Sincerity

Obviously, Bianca was gifted with a Bee Digimon as her perfect partner. FanBeemon was adorable, but definitely bigger than the average human bee. She and Bee quickly became best friends and did everything together. FanBeemon formed a crush on Kotemon, sometimes getting into trouble just so he could save her. She enjoyed becoming Grademon just to prove she was better than he was, though.

~Brodie~

Partner: Palmon Digivolution line: Nyokimon-Tanemon-Palmon-Togemon-Lillymon-BanchoLillymon-Rafflesimon Crest/Digi-Egg: Knowledge

Palmon and Lalamon were as good of friends as their human partners were. Palmon, however, had quickly formed a crush on Falcomon. Unlike her other friend, FanBeemon, she didn’t try and get into dumb situations to be saved. She admired from afar, but proved her own strength, too. She once saved Falcomon and Matt, but they, too, had once saved them. Palmon would never forget the moment Crowmon had swooped in and saved her, as Matt leaped off of his back to catch a falling Brodie. Lillymon and Lilamon were close in design, but BanchoLillymon was “epic,” according to Toby. She was a gothic beauty that became even more gorgeous when she took the extra step to becoming Rafflesimon. Much like her other female counterparts, all the boy Digimon swooned over her. Except the one she wanted most.

~John~

Partner: Vorvomon Digivolution line: Mokumon-DemiMeramon-Vorvomon-Lavorvomon-Lavogaritamon-Volcanicdramon-AncientVolcanomon Crest/Digi-Egg: Vanity

What’s better than a goddess for a partner? A dragon that is made of lava and smoke. Vorvomon is adorable and fierce, and a little vain. He often steals John’s rings because they are “shiny” and he likes them. The two also have contests to see who can blow more smoke. John’s vape tricks amaze the small dragon, but in his final form of Volcanidramon, he out smokes anyone. He’s proud of this fact, too.

~Jaren~

Partner: Gomamon Digivolution line: Pichimon-Bukamon-Gomamon-Ikkakumon-Zudomon-Vikemon-Plesiomon Crest/Digi-Egg: Desire

What’s more Canadian than a seal? One that turns into both a Viking beast and a mythological Cryptid dinosaur. Jaren refers to Gomamon as “Bappo” from time to time, for no other reason than to piss the little guy off. Gomamon hates the nickname, but he loves his partner too much to truly be mad. He’ll never admit it, but after a while, he gets used to it. The two are a perfect pair, and match John and Vorvomon. Vorvomon is a fire monster, while Gomamon loves the water. They’re perfect best friends.

~Ezra~

Partner: Patamon Digivolution line: Poyomon-Tokomon-Patamon-Angemon-MagnaAngemon-Seraphimon-ShadowSeraphimon Crest/Digiegg: Kindness

Okay, so you’d think the kind of Raccoons would get a Raccoon as a partner. Sadly, none exist, so he is stuck with an orange hamster with wings. Patamon turns into an angel, and by his “extra step,” is dark and beautiful. Ezra jokes he made him this way with his dark humor, but the idea of the angel of kindness and hope forming into a shadowy fallen angel terrified him at first. It made up for not being a Raccoon and for being a literal religious being. Ezra wouldn’t admit it, but Angemon had better hair than he did.

~Grizzy~

Partner: Bearmon Digivolution line: Punimon-Tsunomon-Bearmon-Grizzlymon-Pandamon-BanchoLeomon-Callismon Crest/Digi-Egg: Guts

Nelson was surprised to get a partner at all. But Bearmon, with his cute little snapback, was perfect. He couldn’t be happier to have him. How the little bear turned into a grizzly, then a panda, than a goddamn lion in a suit, and then to a bigger grizzly bear with guns for hands, he didn’t know, nor care. He loved his little buddy more than anything.

#misfits #misfits and associates #gay baby gang #inotorious #swaggersouls #goodguyfitz #mccreamy #Zuckles #tobyonthetele #grizzy #smii7y #KryozGaming #raccooneggs #bordie #heyimbee #digimon #crossover

16 notes · View notes

buffystylez-blog · 7 years

Text

Innocence

Directed by: Joss Whedon

Written by: Joss Whedon

Starring: Sarah Michelle Gellar, Alyson Hannigan, Nicholas Brendon, Anthony Head, Charisma Carpenter, David Boreanaz, Seth Green, Robia La Morte, Juliet Landau, and James Marsters

Welcome to episode fourteen, which should be called Men are Dogs, Love is Bullshit, but Cardigans Never Let You Down.

Outfit 1

Someone call the doctor, because Dru looks sick as fuck.

Oh, and Angel is evil again because gypsy curses and guys. I am very tired and it’s been so long that I have no energy to discuss the fact that Joss Whedon is a dirtbag (’allegedly’) and this whole ‘moment of perfect happiness’ thing bothers me more and more the older I get. I’m assuming it’s supposed to be the whole monsters as metaphor for standard teen experience for now until I’ve had more protein or whatever.

Technically this is her outfit from last episode. I don’t like the pants. Also I’m not going to refer to this as a walk of shame because it’s a phrase that’s designed to make women feel like shit and it’s bullshit and turns out I have just enough energy to say that.

Also I would feel no shame if my hair and makeup looked like that after her night. I fucking love her season 2 hair.

Outfit 2

I am living for this outfit. I would still wear this every day. Every. Day. EVERY. DAY.

Jenny’s wearing beige, so we know she’s up to no good. Willow is amazing, as fucking ever. Xander is the worst, as fucking ever.

I wanted this cardigan. I wanted it so much. Cardigans were big in the late 90s and they deserve all of the acclaim they received and continue to receive. I am still committed to cardigans. I have about three at work now. And a shit-tonne more at home.

Buffy means bidness this ep. It’s all french rolls, sensible pants and knee-high boots.

I hope this is a weird lighting effect on the pants.

Willow has this Adidas backpack so it’s all going to be ok.

Guess who’s back? Back again? Angelus is back. Tell a friend. No, but seriously, tell a friend because they need to take precautions. He’s not just a vampire, he’s a total psycho. And a piece of shit.

Outfit 3

I had this shirt or something like it. And I can guarantee it never fit properly so I probably didn’t wear it. I’m also sure I bought mine from Jay Jays.

You know it’s a dream because it looks like that part in Vertigo when Scottie follows Madeleine around San Francisco.

I bet I tried to wear black pants and boots with it as well. But not knee high boots, because... well, I don’t like to talk about it. Ok, it’s because my calves are too fat.

This is Buffy’s ‘proof’ Jenny is a lying liar. It’s also further proof she’s a babe.

Outfit 4

Our girl is pissed. Because gypsies. And curses. And dudes. And wearing crosses given to you by dudes who turn into pieces of shit when you have sex with them. And for people who lie to Giles and make him sad.

Buffy does some invettigation (I hope there was quiet, please) with Giles and there are dead gypsies and messages on walls in blood.

Piece. Of. Shit

So Xander’s apparently useful this episode and is getting a weapon for Buffy to use against the Judge or whatever. I guess these guys are lookouts for Xander and Cordy? I don’t actually care, I just want to point out how adorable Willow is.

Also, how old is too old to be adorable like this? Asking for a friend who is definitely not me and definitely did not just turn 35.

Did Cordelia hit her head before getting dressed?

I hate Xander. I hate that he’s the ‘nice guy’ and I hate that he hurts Willow and I hate the way he treats Cordelia and I hate the way he speaks to Buffy and I hate how much I love that shirt.

So Angelus and Dru and the Judge hit up the mall because humans be shoppin’, humans. Be. Shoppin’

This is the least convincing shopping mall location I’ve ever seen. Or is it meant to be a cinema in a mall? Fuck, man. I feel like I can’t trust my own eyes, or brain, any more.

Buffy has this bazooka or whatever and it kills the Judge (I think) and then she has a super dramatic face-off with Angelus.

She looks fierce but you can tell she lacks the conviction to do this right now. But she has just enough conviction to beat the shit out of Angelus.

Outfit 5

Two generations of pairing white track pants with white socks. And it’s beautiful.

Next up, werewolves (not swearwolves).

Giles forever, other guys never.

Until next time, Slayerettes.

43 notes · View notes

jakejamesjournalism · 5 years

Text

a list: the best posse cuts in hip-hip over the last 10 years.

Highlighting some of the best group efforts in rap. To qualify, the song must have been released after July of 2009 and feature at least 4 people. There are some incredible tracks with 3 rappers that had to be omitted...

10. Slippery- Migos ft Gucci Mane

It felt right that the list of best posse cuts started with raps premier posse. Migos, the most charismatic and star powered rap group this half of the decade shows why on Slippery, with the help of a rejuvenated Gucci Mane. Like all their best tracks, Quavo immediately sets the tone with his great ear for melody and unpredictable cadence. Offset seamlessly takes it from there making hilarious brags about his girl looking like a wildebeest before going into triple time about the usual suspects: Patek Phillipe, models, full throttles, and Gucci’d up collars. Takeoff ends the song sounding possessed after Gucci gives one of the most patient and introspective verses of his life. When it comes to posse cut trap rap, Slippery has all you’ve ever wanted in abundance.

9. All the Way Up (Remix)- Fat Joe, Jay Z, Remy Ma, French Montana & Infared

I’d venture to say this song got more mainstream airplay than any other track on this list. Released late May of 2016, this siren glaring club ready banger was synonymous with the summer of 2016. The song has more than most summer hits that come and go. Show-stopping verses from both Jay Z and Remy Ma make this remix a truly memorable affair. Jay Z understood the moment, realizing the magnitude of publicly addressing Lemonade on record for the first time. He brilliantly deflects the scathing aspects of the record and brushes it off as just another example of him getting money. His homage to Prince is among the most emotionally resonant rap bars he’s conjured up in years…all the more so since Jay actually owns the Prince catalog. I would love to see Jay relegate himself to an Andre 3000 type of role going forward, especially after he cemented his legacy with the late career gem 4:44. The second half of the song belongs to Remy Ma, who makes you feel every syllable in a verse so raw and emphatic you can’t help but feel all the rage spending “7 winters and 6 summers” on vacation can build up. South Bronx legend Fat Joe’s verse gives you a laugh and French relegated to the bridge is the perfect amount of him on this radio posse cut that offers far more than most in its class.

8. Big Beast- Killer Mike, Bun B, T.I & Trouble

There isn’t a track #1 on any hip-hop record in recent memory that just set the tone for what’s to come quite like ‘Big Beast.’ “Hardcore G-Shit! Homie I don’t play around!” A call to arms that is just the beginning. Listening at the time primarily out of my love for Definitive Jux. The track, produced entirely by El-P drew me in, especially the tempo flip after Trouble’s futuristic bridge. Futuristic or not, the song is a vivid portrait of street life in Atlanta. Full of Bun B’s wise man advice “Don’t leave till your ass get grown” and T.I’s full-bodied imagery, “A record full of felonies, searching for a better me/ But choppers go off in my hood like Iraq, Cuba, Tel Aviv.” For five minutes you inhabit that ATL street corner.

Killer Mike makes it clear, in order to make it in the streets of Atlanta; one must be a Big Beast. The socially conscious rap anthem served as an unforgettable reintroduction into Killer Mike, someone I’ll admit, I always associated with as an inferior extension of Outkast and the Goodie Mob. Here Michael Render demands to be heard. A singular vision with the power to resonate in an underground rap scene that happened to be dying for his perspective. With Big Beast, the El-P and Killer Mike creative flood gates officially opened. Lucky for us.

7. Really Doe- Danny Brown ft. Kendrick Lamar, Ab-Soul & Earl Sweatshirt

Like all great posse tracks, the best verse shouldn’t be easy to agree on. The down played modest hook provided by Kendrick Lamar does a good job bridging what’s most important on the track. The verses. Every verse could be considered the best. A hilarious manic Danny Brown who is “rolling up with them vegetables.” Ab-Soul’s sixteen bars playfully bend his patent hardcore bars with socioeconomic realities, a verse that exemplifies all that’s ever made him a compelling emcee. Kendrick does his thing as per usual and Earl Sweatshirt doesn’t. In my favorite verse of the song, Earl ditches his cryptic and triple entendre tendencies for a more straight forward take a bat to your head approach. Aggressively honest and devoid of his usual wordplay techniques, Earl ponders “I’m at your house like, ‘Why you got your couch on my Chucks?’ Motherfucker.” The comic relief is there. Really Doe is lyrical labyrinth designated for the purist of rap fans. Four world class emcees each with a different flow, each on top of their game. Enjoy.

6. Move that Dope- Future ft. Pusha T, Pharrell Williams & Casino

Future’s creative 360 from emo auto-tuned heart throb to drugged up nihilist was complete here. His split from Ciara turned his heart cold and drove him into various chemical comfort zones. Chemical zones that acted as his muse, similar to Pusha T, who finds himself right at home on a track like this. He delivers some of the most expressive drug rap bars of the song, totally in tune with the general concept. Someone who is a stranger to the general concept of “moving dope” is Pharrell. Such songs aren’t usually up his alley, but Pharrell rapping on anything is usually a gift, and here is no exception. His personal alienation from dope moving proves to be totally irrelevant as he spends time in the cosmos “frequency: high, like a spaceship” and bringing to life his personal idiosyncrasies “The Gandalf hat and the weird ass clothes, that’s Commes des Garcon and the Buffalo.” Over menacing production from Mike-Will-Made-It, Future rings in his new sound and mantra with a group of A-list friends, one familiar with moving dope, the other familiar with constant reinvention. Here, Future handles the scales beautifully.

5. Zip That Chop That- Black Hippy

Revisiting ‘Zip that Chop That’ makes me once again yearn for the Black Hippy album that was always promised but never came. This overlooked early career gem was released in 2010, and provided a young white kid with his very first Kendrick Lamar exposure. Before Section.80 and Setbacks, ‘Zip That Chop That’ was all I knew. What’s amazing about Black Hippy is how easily they fall into their respected roles. Jay Rock comes on strong as the deep voice of reason, having the rest of the crews back no matter what Compton issue may erupt. Ab-Soul acts as the groups source of comic relief, while Schoolboy Q acts as the vice, the devil on the other shoulder. And then there’s a young Kendrick… his commentary on the plight of black Compton youth not yet legendary. Excelling in the tracks latter third, it takes three listens to realize Kendrick is the best rapper on the song. It’s no surprise success has came to the rap collective individually, but Zip That reminds us all some of their best material comes from them working together.

4. Oldie- Odd Future

The most influential group to any millennial ‘Left Brain’ hip hop listeners. After Bastard I wrote off Tyler as a creative but drama seeking iconoclast, I didn’t give much else released by the collective an ear. It wasn’t until Frank Ocean started to release music did I think to revisit odd future’s discography in a different light. Oldie is a song that makes me glad I revisited. Who is rapping is ultimately irrelevant, the chemistry between the worst rappers of the group and those who could be considered geniuses is uncanny. It creates a universal feeling of friendship and community that transcends skill level. This was taking putting your friends on to a whole new level. The talent lies in Tyler, Frank, and Earl, but for a long time the other members of the collective had roles inside the collective that held immense value to those who actually had talent. Tyler, Frank and Earl fed off the group, all of its flaws, for better or worse. Seeing how unwavering and passionate their belief is in their own vision, it’s clear that Odd Future was a talent incubator that ended up cultivating three of the most influential artists of the modern-day era.

3. Mercy- Kanye West, Pusha T, Big Sean & 2 Chainz

Turning the posse cut into high performance art was something Kanye spent a lot of the decade mastering. Quite frankly, from the G.O.O.D Friday roll-outs to the standout tracks on Cruel Summer to Ultralight Beam, this entire list could’ve been comprised of Kanye orchestrated posse cuts. Excluding Ultralight Beam, which I didn’t find qualifying enough to be featured on this list, Mercy is the most meticulously curated posse cut Kanye released. The lead single on a project Kanye wanted to use to emphasize the depth of his label, Mercy does exactly that. He put Pusha T and Big Sean in a position to spend the summer all over the radio, threw down a solid verse himself after an understated beat switch, all leading to the breakout performance of 2 Chainz, who’s rap career took off to stratospheric heights after his show stopping verse on Mercy. Kanye succeeded in putting all his boys on without compromising the artistry in the slightest bit. Most posse cuts will sacrifice a bit of innovation in order to focus more on the lyrics. An old school approach to keeping posse cuts and the spirit of rap as competition alive. Once again, Kanye refuses to play by those rules. Mercy is high performance art, lyrical rap, pitch-black club banger, and total team flex all in one.

2. 1 Train- Asap Rocky ft Kendrick Lamar, Joey Bada$$, Yelawolf, Danny Brown, Action Bronson & Big K.R.I.T

The sound of ‘1 Train’ actually sounds like a train ride. The production for this timeless epic rap track fits the narrative perfectly. The track provides a transient urban feeling mixed with unpredictable DJ premier like scratches and gritty lo-fi drums. It’s a beautiful canvas for hook-less rap music. It never tires, and neither do the emcees. Every rapper featured on this track has something relevant to say from Danny Brown’s hilarious “Weed a different color like a hood rat bra and panties” observation or Action Bronson “selling Susan Sarandon.” Asap’s impressive “Bag made of Goyard, cheffin’ like I’m Boyar-Dee, probably selling D in your local courtyard” line is an emphatic change of cadence. Big K.R.I.T declares himself a true artist on the songs final line and after delivering what could arguably be the tracks strongest verse, a true artist sounds like an understatement. Everyone rapping punches above their weight. The ULTIMATE posse cut.

1. Forever- Drake ft Kanye West, Lil Wayne & Eminem

Released ten years ago in August, Forever did a great job living up to its namesake. From the Lebron starring music video to Drakes hook, Forever basically predicted the future. Three weeks later on another platinum record Lil Wayne raps “We gon’ be alright if we put Drake on every hook.” That era of hip hop officially started on this track. Finding himself on a track with three legends who all decided to bring above average verses, Drake holds his own by coming up with the first of a million ubiquitous hooks. His combination of rap skill, hook making and singing proved to be a tool set big enough to hang with the greats, even when they themselves brought their A-games. It also opened the door to the possibility that Drake himself could be a great one day. Personally, I think it still remains to be seen, but the hooks are still catchy, and the numbers don’t lie.

1 note · View note

jakejames09 · 5 years

Text

Raps Best Posse Cuts of the last 10 Years.

10. Slippery- Migos ft Gucci Mane

9. All the Way Up (Remix)- Fat Joe, Jay Z, Remy Ma, French Montana & Infared

8. Big Beast- Killer Mike, Bun B, T.I & Trouble

7. Really Doe- Danny Brown ft. Kendrick Lamar, Ab-Soul & Earl Sweatshirt

6. Move that Dope- Future ft. Pusha T, Pharrell Williams & Casino

5. Zip That Chop That- Black Hippy

Revisiting ‘Zip that Chop That’ makes me once again yearn for the Black Hippy album that was always promised but never came. This overlooked early career gem was released in 2010, and provided a young white kid with his very first Kendrick Lamar exposure. Before Section.80 and Setbacks, ‘Zip That Chop That’ was all I knew. What’s amazing about Black Hippy is how easily they fall into their respected roles. Jay Rock comes on strong as the deep voice of reason, having the rest of the crews back no matter what Compton issue may erupt. Ab-Soul acts as the groups source of comic relief, while Schoolboy Q acts as the vice, the devil on the other shoulder. And then there’s a young Kendrick... his commentary on the plight of black Compton youth not yet legendary. Excelling in the tracks latter third, it takes three listens to realize Kendrick is the best rapper on the song. It’s no surprise success has came to the rap collective individually, but Zip That reminds us all some of their best material comes from them working together.

4. Oldie- Odd Future

3. Mercy- Kanye West, Pusha T, Big Sean & 2 Chainz

2. 1 Train- Asap Rocky ft Kendrick Lamar, Joey Bada$$, Yelawolf, Danny Brown, Action Bronson & Big K.R.I.T

1. Forever- Drake ft Kanye West, Lil Wayne & Eminem

1 note · View note