#Nemo is burning out fml

[nemo-of-house-hamartia]

I don't want to be at work.

I want to be home, sipping iced tea and drawing my lovelies smooching each other and looking at each other tenderly.

I NEEED.

[anestheticrage]

Be me: Japanese honor student🎓, 15, with half a brain and even less of a plan. Hunting bitches by day and witches by night. Livin that dank only child✌️ life while mom n dad yeet all over the globe, leavin me plenty of time to forget not to make 2 lunches for myself #quirky 😜

no time for socialization or basic electronics skills ???📱??? when your best friends are an alien demon rabbit🐰👽 and the inexplicable Hole ™ in your brain. lmao, btw did i mention im ✨M✨A✨G✨I✨C✨A✨L✨

dreamin bout my 2D waifus again when familiar pink haired cancer patient dances through my brain passin out fliers: Kamihama Meguca Dating Service: Sponsored by Cult of the Magius. 250 stones per session 🤔

seems legit, Mr. Moneybags. wasn't spending my unwieldy sack of gemstones on anything else anyway. lets pull 💎💎💎

first up we have Redhead Radagast and her plethora of plants. 🌿☺️🦎

anndd, nearly dies immediately. 

well not off to a great start but i guess shes pretty cute at lea- oh FUCK its her girlfriend, Tsundere Poseidon😒🔱💦, and their exasperated, straight and single Sword Mom 😔🗡️🔥. fml gonna have to save up for the next pull. might as well play a few rounds with what i got tho. 

get in some good girl talk about things like school, color coded hair styles, body count, permanent soul damage, and our personal demon pacts. ya know, the usual 😚 . realize my dark backstory seems to be missing, so the girls take me to Ketchup Queen Sappho 🍅🥧 (wtf?) to molest my glowy egg stone. whatevs, more action than ive had since Kuroe 🖤 got added to the story anyway

the gang agrees it's time to hunt down the cutest rabbit pimp 🕶️🐇💵 in the city. >> say 🎵mukyuuu🎵 one more time and ill hug you so hard my backstory will pop right out, you adorable fluffy bastard. plz be my new best friend 💕

Form brand new friendship pact with Kyubae, and remember that my lil Sis 🐥 was always the best wingman for pickin up magic chicks, and kept her side of the room so spotless i forgot she existed. whoops 乁༼☯‿☯✿༽ㄏ Maybe if I find her i can stop paying these exorbitant pull fees.📵💎

speaking of which: hot damn this week's featured bachelorette is a 19 year old model and magical detective🔎 with massive levels of PTSD and self loathing 🥵💙💦 more likely to stab you or dramatically jump off a rooftoop than utter a single positive comment. wow, maybe i really COULD find true love…

... if i had MORE THAN A 1% FUCKING DRAW CHANCE. 😡 smh

hard to make much progress finding sis or winning the broken heart of a hard boiled detective amidst the never ending lover's quarrel of the Trident Vine Lesbians. 💔 Sword Mom tells them if they don't behave a monster will take them away. LOL classic mom 🤣

>>>HOLY FUCK IT DID

declare all-out war on urban legends, starting with staircases ⚔️ to reunite the dysfunctional trio, and hope that I net a way better lineup with the next 10x pull. at least sad sleuth lady came to help out. they say combat is the best way to bond wi-   and there she goes off the rooftop again 🙄 fml

alright that got way off track, we need a fresh start, away from all the loli drama. how bout a little B&E🔓🔨🤷🏻‍♀️ at the local house of worship to clear my head. ahh nothing like the unanswered prayers of the masses to get you in the mood for another wasted pull, and the 🔥 MIGHTIEST 🔥 headache you could ask for with a side of Double Cooked Pork 🐖🍜 (meh 5/10🧾)

venture forth into the spiritual unknown with your new human flamethrower🔥🌻🧡 and ask your favorite private eye to please, for the love of Eve, trade Meguca accounts with me~~~ Head through the eastern spirit portal to meet up with hologram propaganda sis and detective crush's evil ex, who joined a dating-app cult (#fuck) and also turned into the moon?🌕?(that's rough buddy)

get ambushed by Acid Horse on Wheels 🌈🐴 and vomit up my soul so hard that its time for a crossover episode. T U R F F F   W A R R R *que operatic harmonies* 💛 Blondie with the hair drills and enough attitude and guns to fill up a noble phantasm tries to ban my account permanently, but PI heartthrob denies her admin privileges. aww babe i didn't know you cared. 😭♥️

get kidnapped by my new true love and go back to her place 😏  defs enough empty rooms to house five emotionally traumatized girls and at least two ghosts hehehe👻 XD 💚🃏💜🎸 decide to form the anti-gossip brigade and recruit my blazing sunflower after getting ambushed by the witch living in my fruit loops🥣

❌outvoted 2:1 that cults are bad. mf. fiinneee one last pull to round out the team and then I'll delete the app. cmonnn Karin 🎃~

OH HELL YEAH TWO FOR ONE.

Always wanted a daughter 💜🔨🐄 with a penchant for pissing off the local Martial Arts & Books Club and drinking suspicious liquids offered by total strangers. Well if it's good enough for her AND the sexy mayadere with enough game to seduce a mermaid, might as well get in on that myself. 

#curseddrank 🤢 0/24 would not recommend to a friend, 'cept maybe Ria

win alot of cash 🤑, blow up a fountain, meet the pied piper²🎶🖕, moon cult, monochrome feathers, something about liberation✊🏻; adopt temper tantrum cow girl. aces 💜🥩

Next up!!! skydiving with DJ Hammer! Jump to apparently-not-certain death after suicidal A.I. 💚💾🗼 tells you to rescue her hostage before they run out of Radiohead albums and have to move on to Thom Yorke's solo discography. save the invisible shield kitten 💚👑😿 from happiness and get chased through the internet by the sexiest homicidal Paint Pallette 💚🎨😈 since Caravaggio. (apparently green is the color of the digital apocalypse. i’m deleting Kako from my friend's list)

that’s it, fuck this app. 250 stones 💎 per-life-threatening-experience is more than i’m willing to deal with 😓 don’t wanna mess with the perfect nuclear family anyway. we've already got: 

✔️the two emotionally traumatized moms with memory and commitment issues

✔️the adhd daughter with anger management problems and a giant hammer

✔️the psychologically abused scizophrenic cat

✔️and the eccentric aunt with crippling anxiety

#squadgoals

now that were done hoarding bitches, its time to hunt the witches. and the bitches makin the witches. btw did i mention the witches ARE the bitches! AND WERE ALL GOING TO DIE!? 📽️⁉️💀 wait fuck lets back up a second

This is Nemo📕 and Token🧪 and they have all the answers but prefer if you only ask vague questions in exchange for vague responses so they can fill in the rest by discussing their superior intellect 🧠 at length. not to mention they built that dating app, so of course everyone in my harem decides to be a FUCKING. TRAITOR.🤬

cept waifu prime ofc 🥰💙. [PTSD > brainwashing] 'yOu CaN bE tHe LeAdEr NoW'. i have been from the very beginning you traumatized Hinedere nightmare. maybe if you weren't so caught up collecting surrogate daughters you would've noticed IM👏THE👏ONLY👏 ONE👏PROGRESSING👏THE FUCKING👏PLOT✨

rescue the rest of dysfunctional found-family™ from selves before my adorable firebender burns down Disnihama🎡🔥😱 during her weekly anxiety attack. (love the makeover T B H) 

CHAPTER 8: Magical Girl Massacre🩸🗡️

   - everyone has like, the shittiest day ever

   - the new Pope really needs to be extradited from the church

   - make friends with a really pretty tree 🌺🌲✨

i swear, if i don't finish this god damn story in time to get that free pull im gonna beat the shit out of every mirror i find in that giant mansion that i haven't even had any time to even mention yet. 🖕🏚️ let alone EVERYTHING happening with the prequel [fuck you, I'm the star] girls 💗💜💙💛❤️️ and their multidimensional melodrama. We don't need that many repetitive af episodes to emphasize that Homo-ra is a shitty person. we've all seen Rebellion. 🙄

NO, I DONT CARE IF YOU WANT SAPPHO'S BACKSTORY, I ONLY HAVE 79 STONES LEFT AND IF YACHAN FINDS OUT I HAVEN'T DELETED THE APP YET IM GONNA HAVE TO GO SLEEP IN WITH SANA 😭💎💸😠

uhhhggggg where were we… Topple a cult and burn down Hotel Denoument only to realize that Sis was fused with the dating app servers this entire madokafuckin time (told ya she was the best wingman 😊). 

Dilemma: Sis =🥚, Triumvirate of Trouble want 🐣. What do? vote now:

Help Hatch - IIIIIII

Not Do That - IIIII

What The Actual Fuck Is Going On - IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Lets just fight everyone until something good happens.

🔥🔫🔥🗡️🔥😱🔥🌆🔥😱🔥🛡️🔥💣🔥

Kill (???) the artist-in-chief of the italian reindeer murder police after teaching her the true meaning of Christmas 🎄 hatch 🐣lil Sis and realize she WAS your wingman all along🐰 MUKYUUUU! we're just gonna ignore how much trouble it would have saved if you'd just mentioned that. "yOu DiDnT aSk..." 

FUCK YOU SPACE BITCH. ONCE AN INCUBATOR ALWAYS AN INCUBATOR 🖕🐇🔪

anywho, somewhere along the lines we of course summoned the Antichrist ⚙️ because why not raise the stakes to max and still not kill off a single character. Madofuckinkami, can we PLEASE wrap this up. 😩💤

feathers (not the culty kind, tfm) rain from the sky, and the power of friendship and not having the Urobutcher 🔪🩸as a lead writer saves our peacefully sectioned off alternate reality 😇

TL:DR fuck cults, real life waifus DO exist, don't sell your soul to space rabbits, or your stones to megacorporations. Enjoy arc 2 on the JP server with your shitty translation patch you filthy fuckin weebs 

Yours Truly, 

- Thirsty Weeb Eroha 💗💎😘 

[whitefx]

I’m doing what no one wanted or asked me to do :D

1. Who was the last person you held hands with? My ex?? 

2. Are you outgoing or shy? Both 

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing? Uhh friends. hopefully. Um family friends coming to visit.. i’m not sure bc i’m becoming a social recluse and apologize for everything i do.  Oh and my college classmates I met last week, they seem super coolio.

4. Are you easy to get along with? I’d like to think so

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you? Idk, I hope so?

6. What kind of people are you attracted to? Guys, Gals, and nonbinary pals. Idk people with good personalities, nerds, soft features, again, nerds.

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? I highly doubt it

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind? Uh? No one right now?

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? Thats a yes and no answer. I’m okay with it but at the same time because I don’t know much of how sex works it sort of does? 

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? Not sure. I don’t do deep convos often, the closet thing i’ve gotten is when I angrily told someone I’ve been wanting to die for the past few days, and that was a good month or two ago. I don’t usually do deep convos, I usually talk to myself about that jazz. 

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

“Nice Nice”

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now? 

Sharp Edges by Linkin Park, Heavy By Linkin Park, One more light Linkin park, Save by Tyler Joseph, Falling too by Tyler Joseph 

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair? Yess 

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles? Eh, not really 

15. What good thing happened this summer? I started a college class. (summer legit just started)

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? Likely not, as I doubt she wants to talk to me ever again. 

17. Do you think there is life on other planets? Maybe 

18. Do you still talk to your first crush? Yes? 

19. Do you like bubble baths? I would if my tall large body would fit in the bath tub

20. Do you like your neighbors? I do, more or less nice 

21. What are you bad habits? Eating food all the time, scratching at my skin, keeping in my emotions

22. Where would you like to travel? The uk! 

23. Do you have trust issues? Yes and no. I trust too easily but at the same time I have a hard time trusting at all 

24. Favorite part of your daily routine? Sleeping

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? My chest/weight

26. What do you do when you wake up? Check my phone for the time

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? Darker 

28. Who are you most comfortable around? My friend Ridge I think? I’m awkward around him once again bc i’ve been out of contact with him for a while and only recently got back to talking to him, otherwise i’ve become really uncomfortable socially around people

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up? Not yet. 

30. Do you ever want to get married? Some day

31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail? Nah not anymore

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with? Good question?? I’m not too into sex?? and I can’t remember/don’t know names very well. 

33. Spell your name with your chin. Nah fam

34. Do you play sports? What sports? I used to do Tae Kwon Do, but not for awhile 

35. Would you rather live without TV or music? Tv probably. 

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them? Probably? Not sure?? 

37. What do you say during awkward silences? So... 

38. Describe your dream girl/guy? A nerd, a nerd in shows, video games, movies etc, soft features, cuddly and understanding of emotions, someone a bit taller than me, someone who understands that I get anxious quite easily and wont force me to do things that make me uncomfy.  

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in? Hottopic, Spencers, JC Penny, Michaels, idk I don’t shop that often. 

40. What do you want to do after high school? Get my two year degree, get a job in that process, move out. 

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? I do, but I give a billion chances when I shouldn’t. 

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean? I’m overthinking, i’m doing art, listening to music, i’m angry. 

43. Do you smile at strangers? I do. 

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean? Ocean 

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning? The fear of my parents checking on me, thus seeing my disaster of a room and then being like, get yo room clean, no pc til room clean, and the possibility of being teased at/ told off for sleeping so much.. 

46. What are you paranoid about? Everything tbh.. like fuck.. It makes things hard and it makes some friends disappointed bc I can be super fucking paranoid. 

47. Have you ever been high? Yep. 

48. Have you ever been drunk? Not yet

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? I don’t know.

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore? Dark blue 

51. Ever wished you were someone else? Yea 

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself? My weight 

53. Favourite makeup brand? Idk 

54. Favourite store? Spencers 

55. Favourite blog? Idk 

56. Favourite colour? Dark Navy Blue 

57. Favourite food? A good question 

58. Last thing you ate? Cheese cake 

59. First thing you ate this morning? Cheesecake 

60. Ever won a competition? For what? I don’t think so 

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what? Not yet 

62. Been arrested? For what? Haha no 

63. Ever been in love? I don’t know.. My last relationship was long distance and I started feeling nothing, kind of numb towards my ex, even when I went to see her it was sort of there sort of not.. So I don’t think so. 

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss? My ex got on the couch to be taller than me and we kissed. 

65. Are you hungry right now? No

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends? Idk 

67. Facebook or Twitter? Facebook  

68. Twitter or Tumblr? tumblr 

69. Are you watching tv right now? No 

70. Names of your bestfriends? I don’t know who my bestfriends are anymore because of the stupidity thats fucking ruined my life for the past year. Theres on person, her name is Kaylee 

71. Craving something? What? Cuddles :( 

72. What colour are your towels? Creme-coloured 

72. How many pillows do you sleep with? 6? 

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? Yes 

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have? On my bed, there’s 5, in general thats a good question 

75. Favourite animal? Owls 

76. What colour is your underwear? Blue plaid 

77. Chocolate or Vanilla? Chocolate 

78. Favourite ice cream flavour? Green Tea 

79. What colour shirt are you wearing? Blue gray? 

80. What colour pants? Blue 

81. Favourite tv show? Lucifer or spn 

82. Favourite movie? Spirited Away 

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2? Mean Girls 

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street? Mean Girls 

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls? idk 

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo? Nemo 

87. First person you talked to today? My mom  

88. Last person you talked to today? Dunno yet 

89. Name a person you hate? Me, myself, and I, kind of jking, I don’t really HATE anyone?  

90. Name a person you love? A good question 

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? Nah 

92. In a fight with someone? Not at the moment 

93. How many sweatpants do you have? 1 

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have? 3? 

95. Last movie you watched? The Mummy 

96. Favourite actress? Idk 

97. Favourite actor? Idk 

98. Do you tan a lot? If I try to tan I have to burn my pale pale bod 

99. Have any pets? Yes 

100. How are you feeling? I’ve been better, def been worse. 

101. Do you type fast? I’d like to think so 

102. Do you regret anything from your past? Yea.. 

103. Can you spell well? More or less, when I care to pay attention 

104. Do you miss anyone from your past? Yes? 

105. Ever been to a bonfire party? Yea 

106. Ever broken someone’s heart? probably 

107. Have you ever been on a horse? Yea 

108. What should you be doing? nothing really 

109. Is something irritating you right now? yes 

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt? no 

111. Do you have trust issues? I answered this earlier 

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of? sort of my sister? like I walked past her crying 

113. What was your childhood nickname? Randaloo 

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state? I’ve been to different states

115. Do you play the Wii? Sometimes 

116. Are you listening to music right now? Yes 

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup? Eh 

118. Do you like Chinese food? Yes 

119. Favourite book? Merry Christmas Alex Cross By James Patterson 

120. Are you afraid of the dark? Yes 

121. Are you mean? I don’t know, probably to some people.. 

122. Is cheating ever okay? No 

123. Can you keep white shoes clean? no 

124. Do you believe in love at first sight? maybe 

125. Do you believe in true love? i’d like to hope so 

126. Are you currently bored? always 

127. What makes you happy? bouldering, going out and hanging with friends, DOING something anything. 

128. Would you change your name? I sure plan on it. 

129. What your zodiac sign? Cancer 

130. Do you like subway? Yes 

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? Sister-zone her. 

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? I answered this already 

133. Favourite lyrics right now?  

“I'm holding on Why is everything so heavy? Holding on So much more than I can carry I keep dragging around what's bringing me down If I just let go, I'd be set free Holding on Why is everything so heavy? ” Heavy by Linkin Park 

134. Can you count to one million? No 

135. Dumbest lie you ever told? The lunch I had earlier I gave to my friend bc she didn’t have one. fml lol 

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed? Closed 

137. How tall are you? 5′7 

138. Curly or Straight hair? I have curly hair 

139. Brunette or Blonde? Both 

140. Summer or Winter? Winter 

141. Night or Day? Night 

142. Favourite month? December 

143. Are you a vegetarian? Working on it 

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate? Milk 

145. Tea or Coffee? Both 

146. Was today a good day? I guess 

147. Mars or Snickers? Mars 

148. What’s your favourite quote? 

“I’m still figuring out who I am, but I know I’m not who I was” ~Brendon Urie 

149. Do you believe in ghosts? Yes 

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? “You take off your belt. And it happens again.”

That sounds bad out of context but its not a sexual book at all.