#New Kenpachi are forged in fuck marry kill

[rhaegnarokmidwinter]

weird bleach headcanons: fuck marry kill edition

Alarmingly some of you pornbots and perhaps actual humans (hollows too I dont judge) seem to enjoy this kind of fuckery so enjoy your juice I guess.

When you start spicing up your LoL matches by playing unhinged Bleach "Fuck Marry Kill" with your friend and what we've found is the following:

-Shuhei Hisagi wins an alarming amount of the time. We are just feral for Hisagi and not afraid to show it but honestly we already knew that anyway it just becomes apparent in FMK how thirsty we are for him

-Perspectives were forever changed here. Adding Yamamoto into the mix when he's the real catch is just cruel because I had no choice but to eliminate him. "It's not that I'm too good for him, it's that I'm not good ENOUGH for him." "Oh fuck I didnt think of that"

-Grimmjow is not housebroken in the least. Put up against Starrk and Aizen, was the fucking worst thing to rationalize. Aizen ended up the marry option. I'm still not sure how that happened.

-Gin gets the Kill option far too much it's so fucking unfair

-Kisuke beats out Aizen though (this is where we differ in taste though previously marrying Aizen was a shock)

-Bazz B gets the fuck option a lot. I feel like no one is surprised here.

-Kenpachi needs to be eliminated from FMK for the pure reason that he is forever relegated to either fuck or marry status BECAUSE YOU CANNOT KILL KENPACHI. ONLY KENPACHI CAN KILL KENPACHI. THATS HOW NEW KENPACHI HAPPEN. SO UNLESS YOU WANT TO ALSO BE NEW KENPACHI (which wont happen because as previously stated you cannot kill Kenpachi) MAKE YOUR PEACE WITH MARRYING OR FUCKING THIS MAN. PLEASE ALSO NOTE THAT IF YOU FUCK HIM SURVIVAL CHANCES ARE LOW. GODSPEED AND ENJOY YOUR DEATH BY SNUU SNUU.

-Renji was curiously not brought up this time. Nor was Byakuya. Do what you will with this information.