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what is vpn server name

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what is vpn server name

VPN server identifiers

VPN server identifiers are crucial components in the realm of online privacy and security. These identifiers serve as unique markers for VPN servers, allowing users to connect to specific servers within a VPN network. Understanding these identifiers is essential for optimizing VPN usage and ensuring maximum anonymity and protection online.

One of the primary VPN server identifiers is the IP address. Each VPN server is assigned a distinct IP address, which serves as its online location identifier. When users connect to a VPN, they are assigned the IP address of the VPN server they connect to, masking their true IP address and providing them with anonymity online.

Another important identifier is the server name or hostname. This is the human-readable name associated with the VPN server, making it easier for users to identify and connect to specific servers. Server names are often based on geographical locations or other distinguishing characteristics, such as "New York VPN" or "SecureServer."

Additionally, VPN servers may be identified by their protocol or encryption method. For example, servers may support protocols like OpenVPN, L2TP/IPsec, or IKEv2, each offering varying levels of security and performance. Similarly, servers may utilize different encryption algorithms, such as AES-256, to secure data transmissions.

Furthermore, VPN server identifiers may include information about server load or performance. Some VPN providers offer server status pages or tools that display real-time data on server availability, latency, and usage, helping users choose the best-performing servers for their needs.

In conclusion, VPN server identifiers play a crucial role in the functionality and effectiveness of VPN services. By understanding and leveraging these identifiers, users can enhance their online privacy, security, and browsing experience.

Naming convention for VPN servers

Choosing the right naming convention for VPN servers is crucial for efficient management and seamless user experience. A well-thought-out naming convention simplifies identification, categorization, and troubleshooting, enhancing overall network management.

Descriptive Names: Opt for names that clearly indicate the server's purpose or location. For example, "NYC-VPN" for a server located in New York City or "Finance-VPN" for a server dedicated to financial operations.

Consistency: Maintain uniformity across all server names to avoid confusion. Consistent naming conventions make it easier to locate specific servers and understand their functions at a glance.

Hierarchy: Establish a hierarchical structure for naming servers based on factors like geographical location, department, or function. For instance, "US-NY-Finance-VPN" denotes a VPN server located in New York, dedicated to the finance department.

Abbreviations: Use abbreviations sparingly and ensure they are universally understood within the organization. Avoid overly cryptic abbreviations that may lead to confusion.

Version Control: Incorporate version numbers or release dates into the server names to track updates and revisions. This helps in maintaining an organized infrastructure and facilitates troubleshooting.

Avoid Special Characters: Steer clear of special characters and spaces in server names as they can cause compatibility issues with certain systems and scripts.

Documentation: Document the naming convention protocol comprehensively and make it accessible to relevant personnel. This ensures consistency and assists new team members in understanding the system.

Scalability: Anticipate future growth and scalability needs when designing the naming convention. Leave room for expansion and ensure the convention remains relevant as the network evolves.

By adhering to a clear and systematic naming convention for VPN servers, organizations can streamline network management, improve security, and enhance overall operational efficiency.

VPN server identification methods

VPN (Virtual Private Network) server identification methods are crucial for ensuring the security and reliability of VPN connections. These methods help users verify the authenticity of the VPN servers they are connecting to, preventing potential security risks such as man-in-the-middle attacks and data interception.

One of the most common VPN server identification methods is through digital certificates. When a user connects to a VPN server, the server presents a digital certificate that contains information about its identity, such as its public key and the organization it belongs to. The user's device then verifies the authenticity of this certificate using a trusted certificate authority (CA). If the certificate is valid and trusted, the connection proceeds, ensuring that the user is indeed connecting to the intended VPN server.

Another method for VPN server identification is through pre-shared keys (PSKs). With PSKs, both the VPN server and the client share a secret key that is used to authenticate each other during the connection establishment process. This method is particularly useful in scenarios where deploying digital certificates is not feasible or practical.

Additionally, some VPN protocols incorporate built-in mechanisms for server identification. For example, the Transport Layer Security (TLS) protocol, which is commonly used in VPN implementations, includes a server authentication process where the server presents its digital certificate to the client for verification.

Furthermore, users can manually verify the server's identity by comparing its IP address or domain name against a trusted source, such as the VPN provider's official website or documentation.

In conclusion, VPN server identification methods play a critical role in ensuring the security and trustworthiness of VPN connections. By implementing robust authentication mechanisms such as digital certificates, pre-shared keys, and protocol-specific authentication processes, users can have confidence in the integrity of their VPN server connections.

Server names in virtual private networks

When it comes to setting up a virtual private network (VPN), one key element to consider is choosing server names. Server names play a crucial role in VPN configurations as they help users identify and connect to specific servers within the network.

Selecting appropriate and effective server names can enhance the overall user experience and simplify network management. It is important to choose server names that are easy to remember, relevant to their purpose, and help users distinguish between different servers within the VPN.

Using descriptive names that reflect the location or function of the server can make it easier for users to select the most suitable server for their needs. For example, naming servers based on the geographical location they are situated in can help users connect to the server nearest to them, reducing latency and improving connection speeds.

In addition to descriptive names, incorporating numbering or labeling schemes can further streamline server identification and management. Sequential numbering or categorizing servers based on their capabilities can help administrators keep track of different servers and ensure efficient allocation of resources.

Overall, choosing the right server names is an important aspect of VPN setup that can contribute to a more user-friendly experience and effective network administration. By following best practices and implementing logical naming conventions, organizations can optimize their VPN infrastructure and improve overall connectivity and performance for users.

How VPN servers are named

When it comes to naming VPN servers, there's no one-size-fits-all approach. The naming conventions can vary depending on the provider, their infrastructure setup, and even the geographical locations of the servers. However, there are some common practices and considerations that come into play.

One common approach is to name servers based on their physical location or the nearest major city. This helps users easily identify which server they're connecting to and can also provide a hint about the server's proximity to their own location. For example, a server located in New York might be named "NYC-1" or "NewYork-Server."

Another approach is to use thematic names that reflect the purpose or specialty of the server. For instance, servers optimized for streaming services like Netflix or Hulu might be named accordingly, such as "Netflix-US" or "Hulu-Optimized." This helps users quickly find servers tailored to their specific needs.

Some VPN providers also use numerical naming schemes, assigning each server a unique identifier. This approach can simplify server management and organization, especially for larger networks with hundreds or thousands of servers. For example, servers might be named sequentially like "Server-001," "Server-002," and so on.

In addition to these approaches, some VPN providers may incorporate branding or marketing elements into their server names. This could include including the company name or logo in the server name, or using names that evoke a sense of security and reliability.

Ultimately, the way VPN servers are named can vary widely depending on the provider's preferences and goals. However, the overarching goal is always to make it easy for users to find and connect to the servers that best meet their needs while maintaining a secure and reliable connection.

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maevefiction · 6 years ago

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Your Light in the Mist - Chapter 38

Caught up in all things wedding related, both for my own and Simon’s, as well as enjoying a bit of free time with mister Super Sexy wandering around naked constantly in every hotel room, I’d completely forgotten about my six alarm blaze. And Trudy. There wasn’t much I could do about it while we were in the air because of the time difference, and when confronted with the choice of pulling out my laptop and trying to find out how I was going to manage to procure and set up the servers we needed on my own or snuggling with Tom and taking a nap, the snuggling won out easily.

I woke up when we were circling Heathrow, groaning as I realized that I was royally fucked as far as a normal human-like sleep schedule was concerned. We grabbed our luggage and took a cab back to our flat, and Tom had barely gotten the key in the door when Simon came bounding out onto the landing and nearly tackled me to the floor with a ridiculously powerful bear hug.

“MAUDE, MAUDE, MAUDE! You’re home, you’re home!”

A small squeak emanated from my mouth when I opened it, and I struggled to speak. “DUDE. I love you, but you are crushing the fucking life out of me.”

He loosened his grip, kissed me on both cheeks, then waved at Tom, who knew it was in his best interest to get into our flat as quickly as possible lest he be caught up in the insanity.

“No, no, you must LIVE, woman. LIVE! I need you! NEED. YOU.”

I rolled my eyes. “Yes. I am aware. You need me. What time is it, like, six?”

He nodded. “Something like that. So, did you sleep on the plane? Can we chat? Hmm?”

“I did, in fact, sleep on the plane. But, I really, really need to talk to Trudy ASAP…so can we chat tomorrow instead?”

An eyeroll, followed by a heavy sigh. “Really? Trudy? What could be so…”

“SecureServe dropped the fucking ball, man.”

He gasped. “What do you mean they dropped the ball?”

It was my turn to sigh. “They can’t get the servers done by the first.”

I was released completely as his hands lifted up and came to rest upon his cheeks like the kid in Home Alone. “GET THE FUCK OUT! Did you kill the guy?”

“Not yet. I fired him, though.”

Simon’s head pulled back like a turtle’s. “Excuse me, WHAT?”

“I fired him.”

He wagged his finger at me. “Trudy does not know this.”

I bit my lower lip and nodded. “Nope.”

“Oh, honey…you’d best get your ass down those stairs and tell the girl.” He frowned. “So what are you going to, you know, DO? Delay the launch?”

“Fuck no. We’re going to set up the servers ourselves. Speaking of which…I need your office.”

One hand flew to his hip. “And where am I supposed to work?”

I snorted. “Well, first of all…you working? Reading Tumblr and gossip blogs with a two hour lunch break in between doesn’t really count as work. But, in spite of that, I am willing to turn over my own office to you. I can do my thing anywhere.”

“HA! That’s exactly what Tom tells us!”

“Yeah, well…truth. So. Trudy’s still here, then?”

He nodded. “She’s here until at least ten every night. Sometimes much later if she’s ‘in the zone’ as she calls it. Says her flatmate is distracting when she’s trying to work at home.”

“All righty then. You go back in your cage now, Bridezilla. I’ll see you tomorrow. We can chat over that two hour lunch break.”

“Actually, I’m taking the entire day off and so are YOU, so THERE. Note that I am not disputing the Bridezilla label.”

“Noted. Now you note that I am officially terrified to be your maid of honor.”

“Duly noted and recorded.” He kissed the top of my head. “See you tomorrow, love. Good to have you home.”

“Good to be here. Go have wine. Have some wine for me. Have a LOT of wine for me…”

He laughed. “I think something harder is in order…”

“I’m sure you do.”

The laugh turned into a cackle as he headed back to his flat, closing the door he’d left open in his rush to greet me behind him.

I poked my head into my own flat, calling out to Tom.

“Babe? Where you at?”

He came bounding down the steps.

“Hey. What would you like for dinner?”

My face scrunched up. “Well, actually…”

“I know. You need to go speak with Trudy. But you still require sustenance…may I bring you both something?”

I kissed him quickly. “You may, good sir. Thanks. You’re fucking awesome.”

He grinned. “But am I awesome at fucking?”

“Methinks you know the answer to THAT already.”

“I do, I do. What would you like me to order?”

“Surprise me? Wait. Chinese? Pizza? Shit. Surprise me. Yeah.”

“Will do, my love.”

We embraced, and I turned, walked out the door and down to the office to deliver the news.

****************************************

I found Trudy in the upstairs conference room, the table nearly covered with papers, her hair up in a tightly wound bun as she chewed on her pen while staring at her laptop screen. She looked up at the sound of my footsteps, grinning, then put the pen down before speaking.

“You fired Mark.”

My head tilted to the side. “Um, well…yes. Yes I did. And you knew that how?”

“I lost access to the server about twenty minutes after I called you.”

“Well, shit…I hadn’t considered that aspect. Sorry. I absolutely should have let you know…”

Eyes back on the screen, she waved a hand in my general direction, the other resting on her mouse as she scrolled quickly. “No worries. Don’t give it another thought. I’m delighted that you fired him…he was a humongous tit. So, we’re doing this on our own, yeah?”

“That was the plan.”

“Good to know that picking out everything I think we need wasn’t a waste of time, then. I based it all on their server specs, then…found better stuff.”

I walked around to look at her screen. “Okay, rack servers instead of towers…that will save a ton of space. Dual Intel Xeon E7 processors, Windows Server OS, 128GB RAM, 2.4TB SAS hard drive…holy shit does that say sixteen GRAND? I think I need to sit down.” I flopped in the chair next to her.

“Maude, we can probably still find someone who can get it done in time.…”

I shook my head. “You and I both know that we’ll never be happy with someone else’s work. And we both also KNOW we’ll get everything done in time. So we need, what? Eight to start?”

“Eight to start would give us enough room to host about four thousand accounts, based on our calculations. Not future proof by any means, but it should do.” She began chewing on her pen again.

I nodded. “And we’ll also need all the cables, UPS backups, rack cabinets…and we’ll have to install security devices on Simon’s office, a door keypad or keycard, as well as tamper alarms on the servers themselves in order to meet industry standards. Not too worried about that, nor outside intrusion from hackers, because if they can get in after I’ve locked it all down I’ll be calling them to see if they want a fucking job.”

The pen dropped to the table. “Simon’s office?”

“Yeah. We’re swapping. That’s really the best spot for them, climate-wise and everything. And there’s room for both of us. I don’t actually NEED an office, I can set up shop anywhere when I need to meet someone face-to-face. Oh, and the network will have to be completely, totally separate from the Prosper one, and I’ll want our own T1 lines as soon as we can get them…”

Trudy chuckled. “So I should place the order, then?”

I leaned forward to rest my elbows on the table and cover my eyes with my hands. “Actually, I’m going to have to use Tom’s Amex for this one because my cards actually have limits. Let me text him…oh, he’s bringing us food. Forgot to mention that.”

“Good. I could eat, you know? What’s on the menu?”

I sat up and pulled out my phone. “No clue. Told him to surprise me.”

“I’m willing to wager he brings pizza.”

“Sadly, Trudy, I’m afraid I am not in a financial position to wager due to our imminent expenditure.”

She reached out and poked my shoulder. “You know quite well you’ll make that back in a very short time.”

“HA! Do I? I do not. But I hope so, because we’re on the hook for almost twice the server cost for the wedding. I think I need a cocktail.”

“And Mark will be sending you back the fifty thousand, so that will help, won’t it?”

I rolled my eyes. “I’m not counting on that happening. Like, at all. EVER. No idea how it works over here, really, but in the US it can take forever to even get a lien against someone who doesn’t pay what they owe. But I’m still going to sue the fucker…”

Trudy laughed. “I wouldn’t have even considered thinking otherwise, Maude.”

I typed quickly, then slowed down because I kept screwing up so badly and backspacing took up even MORE time than going at my normal rate.

Hey babe…could you maybe saunter that gorgeous ass down here? I miss you. – M

And also…I kinda sorta maybe totally need to use your Amex card again. – M

Sorry. L I’ll do an EFT to your account from mine tonight. – M

Not even ten seconds later my phone dinged.

I’ll be right down. The pizza should be here soon anyway. And please don’t be sorry. – T

And also…do you happen to have any cash on you? :P – T

I snorted quietly.

Yes. Small amounts of legal tender…that I DO have. :P – M

I turned to Trudy as I got up in order to go meet him at the front of the office. “Glad I didn’t bet. It’s pizza.”

Her right arm shot up in the air, hand in a tightly balled fist. “YES! Pizza!” She rose from her seat. “I’ll go down and get some plates and drinks.”

“Cool. Thank you.”

I walked out of the conference room, reaching the main door just as Tom appeared. He peeked behind me, saw we were alone, then grabbed me by my ass cheeks, pressed me into his crotch and rammed his tongue into my mouth. An indeterminable amount of time passed as we dry humped furiously, the building door buzzer startling us out of our thoroughly inappropriate behavior. Both of us were panting, Tom’s words uneven, his voice deepened into fuck mode.

“I don’t suppose you’d be willing to go pay the delivery person, would you?”

My gaze travelled to his groin, the outline of his cock clearly visible as it strained against his jeans.

I ran my finger along his fly. “Well, clearly you aren’t up for THAT at the moment, so sure, I’ll handle it. The pizza, I mean.” Licking my lips suggestively, I squeezed gently. “THIS I’ll handle LATER.”

His jaw shifted to one side. “Maaauuuuudddeeee…”

Shrugging, I began to saunter away from him. “Don’t you Maude me, mister. YOU started this.”

He groaned, and I shifted my jeans around once I was out of his line of sight, sighing with relief when the seam was no longer digging into my crotch. The pizza delivery person was a red-headed freckled fellow, to whom I handed the equivalent of sixty dollars or so, grabbed the two pies and closed the door with a hasty but pleasant ‘have a great night!’.

Tom was nowhere to be seen when I walked back in, so I traversed to the conference room with the delectable scent of pizza infiltrating my nostrils, and for one brief shining moment I considered locking myself in my office with both and seeing how much I could put away before anyone noticed. Then I remembered it was no longer my office, technically, and THEN I remembered that I had a server order to place and if I deprived Trudy of pizza she might turn against me and that would NOT help my cause at all.

He was seated at the table, while Trudy stood, attempting to organize the scattered paperwork into piles to make room for dinner. When Tom didn’t stand to help me, I knew he’d bolted in there and sat down before Trudy had come back upstairs, and that he was still raring to go. I tittered to myself, but apparently not quietly enough.

Trudy looked up from her most recently formed stack. “Something funny, Maude?”

I placed the pizzas on the table. “Everything’s funny when you’ve spent your day on a Transatlantic flight and are starving and about to spend an insane amount of money on things that will take up a shitload of time you don’t really have in spite of the fact that you already paid someone else to do it for you.” I opened one box, saw that it was plain cheese, ripped it from its companions and took a huge bite. My words were garbled as I spoke and chewed at the same time. “MMMMM, that’s better.”

I grabbed a Coke, a plate and some napkins before flopping into the chair next to Tom. He reached past me to retrieve his own slice, opting for the garbage pie, downing it in five bites, then got his own plate and soda, belching loudly after his first giant draught.

“Goodness, excuse me.”

“Dude, there’s no excuse FOR you.”

He stuck his tongue out at me and snagged another slice for himself and one for me as well. Trudy munched contentedly on her own garbage slice, and we continued in relative silence until both pies were consumed. After we cleaned and washed up, I walked Tom to the reception area. He handed me his Amex…the Centurion Card, also known as the Amex Black Card. Made from anodized titanium, which gave it its coloring, the card number, expiration date and account holder name were laser etched into the metal.

I sighed as I took it from him. “Thanks, babe. Again, sorry.”

He said nothing, and I tilted my head as Tom not replying to an apology was, to date, unheard of. I waited for ten seconds, then righted my head and cocked an eyebrow. He looked down at my hand, the one holding the card, then back up at me, his own brows raised. I shook my head.

“Thomas. I have no clue what you’re getting at here, and your silence is quite disturbing. So why…”

He pulled his wallet from his pocket again, opened it, and removed another AMEX card, holding it towards me so I could clearly see his name displayed on the front.

“Why do you have two cards? Have you always had two cards? Do you have two accounts or…”

He chortled. “Maude. Look at the one you’re holding.”

I gazed downward, and instead of seeing ‘Tom Hiddleston’, I saw ‘Maude Gallagher’. My eyes shot up to meet his, my voice rather toneless when I spoke. “This card has my name on it.”

Nodding as he put his wallet away, he smiled at me sheepishly. “I added you as an authorized cardholder. Hope that’s all right…I know we never really discussed it, but I figured you having your own would be helpful, especially if I’m off filming and you need something for the wedding or anything else that exceeds the limit on your other cards. That made me sound like a bit of a pompous asshole, didn’t it? Sorry.”

I shook my head. “No it doesn’t. My cards have limits. Fact. I just said that to Trudy before we ate, actually. Also fact, you are just so thoughtful and helpful and thank you for this, so much. I’ll keep track of what I spend and reimburse you each month, okay?”

His hand reached out and came to rest on my shoulder. “Actually, I think that’s something else we should talk about.”

“If you mean talking about me not paying you back then I’m going to have to pass, m’kay?” It was something I’d been avoiding, the ‘money talk’. So far I’d insisted on paying my own way, and I didn’t feel comfortable with that changing. He’d been accepting for the most part, but on the plane ride home when I mentioned paying for half of the wedding expenses he’d only managed to utter a terse ‘absolutely not’ and as I balked his jaw tensed, so I let it go.

“Maude. We’re getting married. Husbands and wives typically merge at least some of their finances, do they not? And even if…anyway, how other people handle it doesn’t matter to me. It’s what I’d like to happen, but you may feel differently. Which is precisely why we should have a conversation about it, during which I will persuade you to accept my proposition.”

I said nothing, and he stared at me pointedly until I gave in, sighing, and a smile turned the corners of his mouth upward as I spoke.

“Fine. But we need to have it like, now or I’m going to stick my head back in the sand and pretend this never happened.” He laughed, leaning in to kiss my forehead. “So. I’m going to go spend a shit load of money, then I’ll meet you upstairs and you can have your way with me. Verbally. Something. Okay. Yes.”

He embraced me briefly, then whispered in my ear as he released me. “And after? Physically?”

I rolled my eyes. “Shush. Go. Away with you.”

His normal strut was greatly exaggerated as he walked out the door, and I groaned, shaking my head as I went back to the conference room. Twenty minutes and one phone call later, the servers and all the other components we needed were ordered and set to arrive on Wednesday, early AM. Which happened to be the day before Christmas Eve, and I kept my freak out over losing two days that I should be spending getting everything ready to a holiday under control until I headed upstairs, repeating ‘it’s fine, it’s fine, it’s all fine’ to myself but not believing a single syllable.

Tom had left the door open, and when I stepped inside he was sitting at the dining table, his laptop open and a stack of folders behind it.

“Hey, you. Everything ordered?”

“Yep. Delivery Wednesday morning, and hopefully we’ll get them unpacked, in place and perhaps up and running then because I won’t have any time to work on them until we get back from your mom’s on Saturday. Hopefully I can attend to all Simon’s needs tomorrow and then…” Luke’s voice from behind me made me nearly jump out of my skin. I spun around to see him standing right behind me in the still-open doorway, a half-smile raising the right corner of his mouth.

“Oh, good. You’re here. I just wanted to tell you that there is no way I’m allowing you to give up your office. I’m going to rearrange mine so Simon can share it with me, and you can use his space for whatever you need, plus it can serve as Trudy’s office as well.”

I crossed my arms. “But what about clients? And how are you going to get any work done with him jabbering away?”

Simon yelled from down the hall. “I HEARD THAT.”

I yelled back without moving from my spot. “GOOD. IT’S THE TRUTH. AND I GUESS YOU DON’T ACTUALLY NEED AN OFFICE ANYWAY BECAUSE YOU DON’T DO ANY REAL, ACTUAL WORK.”

“AGAIN WITH THAT SHIT? FUCK YOU, WOMAN.”

Luke grinned. “So it’s settled, then.”

“Looks that way. Thanks, Luke. You’re the best.”

“I know. And please, do remember that tomorrow when you’re out with my better half…just when you think it’s time to bring him back, add on an hour or two, if you don’t mind.”

Simon’s voice again. “YOU SUCK ARSE, THE WHOLE LOT OF YOU!”

Luke winked at me, then off he went, and I closed the door behind him, walked over to where Tom was sitting, wrapped my arms around him from behind and placed a kiss on the nape of his neck. The resulting shiver made me chuckle, and I bit his earlobe prior to speaking.

“So, where would you like me, Mr. Hiddleston?”

He groaned. “I appreciate your diversionary tactics immensely, but…have a seat right here, please.” He patted the chair to his left. I sat, and he turned to meet my gaze.

“I’m just going to jump right in here…so, after the food poisoning incident I began thinking to myself, what would happen if something were to…happen…to me?”

“THOMAS. DO NOT EVEN GO THERE.”

He rested his hand on my thigh. “I have to go there. Not just…death…but what if I was badly injured? Fell terribly ill? What if you didn’t have access to the funds you needed to deal with any of it? And also, as of now, my family could do as they pleased…and I trust them, of course, but…you’re the one who should be making those sorts of decisions on my behalf. Once we’re married, it’s easy, but that’s six months away and…what if, you know? And then, we set an actual timeline for getting pregnant…”

I snorted. “Oh, are you getting pregnant too? WOW! I can’t wait to see THAT.” He took my hand in his, expression deeply concerned, which sobered me and I kept silent, feeling like a snarky shithead as I nodded for him to continue.

“It hit me, the level of responsibility required, and that a month or two from now you could be carrying our child and I…I…I just want to set everything right so no matter what, that child is taken care of properly. So I requested an Amex for you…they’ll send another once we’re married and your name is officially changed…and got the ball rolling so I’d have all the documents in place we need in order to add you to all my financials, the flat, the car…all of it. If you aren’t comfortable doing the same, that’s fine, but all you have to do is sign these and…”

I let go of his hand and leaned back in my chair, processing the enormity of it all. Insisting on paying my own way because NOT doing so made me feel like some sort of freeloader seemed so trivial when I examined the angle he’d been viewing things from, and I was unsure how to phrase things without sounding incredibly idiotic.

“Tom…okay…I was avoiding this whole…thing…because in my head it was just money, and I have money, though it’s not the kind of money you have, and that’s where my issue was, because I don’t want you to ever think that I’m in this for that. Which I’m sure you already know, but…yeah. I’m sorry about that, and I should have just fucking said it, right? Right. And here you are, thinking not of yourself, but of me, and our future family and…wow. I’m really, really sorry. And I have no problem with you being joint in all my holdings, no problem at all…” He cut me off.

“Even with the app coming out? That has the potential to turn you into a higher earner than me quite quickly.”

I stared downward briefly, then back up to stare blankly at him, blinking like an owl as I did math in my head, smiling as I came up with a total. “You’re wrong. Even if we have ten thousand subscribers, I’m still under for the year what you make per film. By a decent amount. So there.”

He laughed. “The maths elude me, Maude. You know this.”

“No lies detected. The way it’s structured is that all the funds go into the Manageall business account and are dispersed from there, so as long as you’re on my checking account you’ll have access, and we’ll need to add you to the business itself…”

Shaking his head, he leaned forward to kiss me softly. “Not necessary.”

I shrugged. “I think it is. I’ll have Barty get to work on adding you to the New Orleans and New York houses as well…that’s pretty much it for me. Just checking, savings, the two houses. Nothing else. Glad I pulled everything out of the market. This is pretty simple, as far as this sort of shit goes.” I grimaced. “I guess we need…wills. Which we’ll have to modify if a kiddo enters the picture…”

He smiled. “When.”

My eyes rolled without hesitation, and I pinched his cheek. “Fine. WHEN. Now, give me a pen and let me sign all the things and then you can fuck my brains out. If that’s acceptable to you, that is. Is it?”

He stood so quickly the chair toppled over behind him, grabbed my wrist and pulled me from mine, then dragged me to the couch, pinning me under him as he ground against me. “No. It isn’t. You can sign those anytime, but right now my cock needs to be in your pussy. RIGHT. NOW.”

“But…TOM…that’s so…irresponsible of you…we need to get everything in done…”

“I AM getting everything done. I’ve just decided to start with YOU.”

He tickled me until I was a helpless blob, yanked my jeans off, unbuttoned and unzipped his own, then sank into me with a moan so ridiculously erotic that I came before he even began to move. Which turned out to be a good thing, as after fifteen quick but punishing thrusts he came as well, grunting into my ear as I wrapped my legs around him in order to rub out my version of the second coming.

We rolled on our sides without separating, no easy task on the couch, his arms wrapped around me the only thing preventing me from falling backward and onto the floor. He smiled softly as I traced the lines of his face.

“You are…you’re…you are such a good man, you know? Always thinking of other people, their needs.”

He kissed the tip of my nose. “Not other people. Just you.”

“Liar. You’re the most considerate human being I’ve ever met. And I love that. Probably because I’m, you know, NOT.”

“Oh, stop. You’re incredibly considerate. Why, while we were on the plane back you only rolled your eyes at the mother of that screaming toddler instead of flipping her off…”

I let my mouth drop open in feigned surprise. “Geeze, you know, you may be on to something there…personally, I think you’ve just made me…SOFT.”

His cock twitched inside me, and he chuckled. “Sorry, but I can’t say the same for you, love. Sign and bed, perhaps?”

“Yada yada yada, screw. Sounds about right.”

We took care of that business, then the other business, and spooned as we dozed off, back in our own bed, in our own flat, and all of a sudden, I realized I was actually looking forward to Christmas, which hadn’t been the case in a very, very long time.

****************************************

Just after Tom and I finished breakfast on Tuesday, Bridezilla Ahlberg barged into our flat with his usual flourish, dressed in black skinny jeans, grey leather chukka boots, a grey tweed pea-coat with matching newsboy cap and a black and grey striped scarf wrapped around his neck. He took one look at me in my ratty, baggy men’s jeans and puffy black parka, pointing accusingly in my general direction.

“Tell me you just came back from a coffee run and that you’re changing, like, now.”

I looked down at myself, holding out one foot to show him the pair of Birkenstock boots I’d picked up before we left for Hawaii but didn’t have a chance to wear. “Um, no. But look, aren’t my new boots really, really beautiful? And cool? LOVE THEM, SIMON.”

His eyes rolled. “Okay, as far as Birkenstocks go they’re decent. But those jeans look like you haven’t washed them in a week and my GOD that JACKET. Wait…is that FAKE FUR ON THE HOOD? You expect me to tool around London with a woman with fake fur on her hood? No. No no no no no. Think of my reputation!”

He was right about the pants…almost. I’d worn them on the flight home and all day yesterday but the rest of my jeans were still packed away and I’d been entirely too lazy to dig them out. Under the parka I had on a black V-neck T-shirt, topped with one of Tom’s zip-up black cardigans, my hair bound up in a sloppy bun that would no doubt become a ponytail at some point in the day. No makeup, either. All of it the stuff of nightmares in Simonland. I snorted.

“Well, look at it this way…I’m so hideous that everyone will spend more time looking at YOU, and that’s the goal, am I right?”

Rubbing his hand with his chin, he considered my statement, then nodded. “That’ll do. Also, we’re already late so there’s simply not time for me to rectify the situation properly. Say your goodbyes to lover boy and let’s move it, please and thank you.”

Tom had snuck into his office without my noticing, and rose instantly from his chair when I entered the room, wiggling around the furniture to embrace me. “You’re off, then, I take it?”

I buried my face in his neck, breathing in his scent, which, let’s face it, was always a terrible idea. Pulling back, I sighed. “Yes. Off I go. Are you SURE you don’t want to…”

He laughed. “Positive. I’ll stay right here in my comfy sweats, thanks. I’ll miss you, though.”

“I’ll miss you too. Need anything while I’m out?”

“Something chocolatey?”

“Will do.” I pulled him down to me, kissing him, tongue running across his lips, then sliding inside his mouth halfway. He bit down gently, letting go as I groaned. “Well, for THAT you’re going to get random sexts all day long, Thomas.”

“Mmm, that sounds fun. And the sweats make for easy access…”

I shoved myself backwards, then turned to face the door as I walked through it, hand in the air and waving behind me. “Hasta la vista, baby.”

He replied using his best Arnold voice. “You’ll be back.”

“Uh huh. Yep. Sure thing.”

His laughter followed me as I grabbed my bag, dragged Simon out into the hall, then closed and locked the door behind me. We walked down the steps to the main entrance, and I was surprised to see a cab waiting.

“Don’t feel like driving today, Simon?”

He opened the cab door for me. “Fuck no. Christmas shopper traffic…we’re cabbing and walking. Though probably more cabbing because that wind is wicked.”

I put my hood up as he got in the other side, smirking. “You know, I hadn’t noticed. This parka is super-duper warm and stuff.”

Plopping down, he flipped me off. “Whatever. So, aren’t you wondering what we’re doing today?”

“Um…maybe? Mostly I’m just wondering how many tantrums you’re going to throw and if I’ll feel like I need a cocktail when all is said and done.”

“How rude. You’re supposed to alleviate some of my stress, not cause more of it.”

“Perhaps you chose unwisely when you asked me to be your maid of honor.”

He threw his arms around me and kissed my cheek. “No, I did not. And I’m going to try very hard to not be nasty, bitchy, petty or throw tantrums today because I love you and I missed you and I have something very important to tell you and something very important to ask you but…first, the tailor so we can do our final fittings and then to Sugared Saffron to check on the cake and then to the Searcys to make sure the menu is set and everything is in place and then I’m taking you to Bocca Di Lupo for lunch, even if you aren’t dressed for it, which is fine because I know the chef, and we’ll talk while we dine and I AM GETTING MARRIED IN NINE DAYS PLEASE HELP ME.”

Taking his jaw in my hand, I got close enough for us to touch noses. “It’s going to be fine, you’re going to be fine, and you know damn well that I’ll make sure that this wedding is going to be specfuckingtacular. Right? No one plans like me. No one organizes like me. No one gets shit done like me. And though I bust your balls endlessly about being a lazy piece of shit, you’re exactly the same way. Paired up? WE ARE UNSTOPPABLE. Now quit worrying and let’s get the work out of the way so we can go to lunch because you need to spill, son. SPILL.”

And so it went, first the tailor, who had to take my dress in another inch at the waist and discreetly averted his eyes as best he could when confronted with my nipples. Then Sugared Saffron, where we examined the sketches for the six-tiered beast Simon had decided upon and got to see the special order 3-D printed topper…replicas of Luke and Simon right down to their eye color, standing shoulder to shoulder and holding hands, Simon in a white suit and shirt, Luke in all black, both with silver cummerbunds and pocket squares. I couldn’t resist asking the manager for contact info for the company he’d gotten the topper from, and he generously accommodated my request, even fishing around in his desk drawer for a business card. In hindsight, I think he was just hoping to distract me and get us out the door before we made any additional changes to the plans he’d thought he was finished with.

The Gherkin blew my mind…Searcys was the top floor, and the views of the city were breathtakingly gorgeous in person. I tuned out and stared at the skyline while Simon talked food with the event manager, knowing his expertise and experience would guide him no matter how stressed he was. My phone dinged…a text from Tom.

Still waiting on those sexts. Or have you decided my biting your tongue doesn’t require retaliation? – T

Oh, it does. I was going to wait and swallow your cock whole when I got home as punishment, but if you’d prefer sexts instead, that’s fine with me. – M

It was at least a full minute before he replied.

Sorry. I dropped my phone and it flew under the desk and then I cracked my noggin on it as I tried to stand up. I believe I may require medical attention. – T

Also, stop texting me RIGHT NOW and I’ll see you later on, all right? K thanks bye. :P – T

As you wish. Lunch is next, then I’ll be home. Love you. – M

Love you too. :D – T

Simon and the event manager were bickering over which vegetarian dish to offer as an alternate main course, and when the manger asked my opinion I shrugged and said I was a carnivore who had little love for veggies, Simon snorted and blurted out ‘meat and only meat for the lady, please…she’s overly fond of sausages, or so I’m told’, which resulted in my excusing myself post haste so I could lose my shit privately in the bathroom, flushing the toilet repeatedly to mask my raucous laughter. By the time I was finished and walked back into the dining area, the waitstaff had arrived and Simon was standing alone, gazing out one of the windows. He turned to me, a sad smile on his face.

“I wish my parents weren’t so awful. This is a huge thing for me in my life, marrying the person I love more than anything, and they’re…just…I read their Facebook posts sometimes, you know? And they’re horrified that their son is getting ‘gay married’ and all their friends are telling them how sorry they are and…anyway. I thought they were progressing a little, but…I was wrong. I should have known better.”

I pulled him into an embrace, his head resting on my shoulder briefly. He cleared his throat and pulled away, but I took his hand, unwilling to let him go.

“So, are they coming to the wedding?”

He sighed. “They have yet to RSVP.”

My mouth dropped open. “You invited them and they didn’t even RESPOND?” He nodded. “Wow. That is incredibly fucked up. I’m sorry, honey. Want me to hack their Facebook accounts and post an endless stream of rainbow flags and gay pride parade videos? Because I totally will. As long as you know their email addresses…and the passwords I might even be able to guess. Hedied number 4, capital U, maybe? Or how about thorncrown33?”

First a gasp, then a giggle, followed by a chortle and a slap to my bicep. “You are HORRID, Maude, and I love you. So much. Thorncrown33. Good lord. HA, see what I did there? My god. HA! AGAIN!” The waitstaff was staring…not openly, but a glance and a smirk here and there. Simon tugged on my hand. “Time to go, BFF. Allow me to provide you with foodstuffs as a reward for your loyalty to the king, and your service as court jester.”

We held hands in the elevator, and continued to do so out on the street as we waited for our cab. He leaned in to kiss my cheek at some point, and I kissed his in return. Words seemed unnecessary, and I wondered if that was what he’d wanted to tell me, which would leave only the thing he wanted to ask me, and I couldn’t even being to imagine what that might be. Out of the corner of my eye I spotted the long lens of a camera poking out from behind a bush.

“Um…Simon? You might want to prepare yourself to be slightly more internet famous than you already are.”

He looked around, and I pointed. He waved at the camera. “Hi! Yes, this is Tom Hiddleston’s fiancée. Maude Gallagher. Yes, I am holding her hand. Yes, I just kissed her.” He let go of me and walked over to the bush, peering around it. “Oh good, there you are. My name is Simon Ahlberg. Lovely to meet you, and sorry to disappoint, but I’m gay. And engaged. Actually, I’m getting married on New Year’s Eve, at the stroke of midnight, to the most wonderful man in the world, Luke Windsor. Proprietor of Prosper PR. Genius, love of my life. Will you print that, maybe? I’d appreciate it if you would. Also, Maude is my maid of honor. It’s going to be the best wedding ever. And I mean EVER! Print that too, okay? I’m a petty bitch and want everyone to be jealous.” He turned on his heel and literally skipped back to my side as I saw the pap emerge and wander off, shaking his head.

My own head was shaking back and forth, and I began to applaud. “Dude, that was fabulous. SO FABULOUS.”

“I know. I hope he runs with it…because seeing an article in the Daily Fail or something about me getting gay married would really piss my parents off.”

During the cab ride he called Luke, whose response to the pap encounter was initially ‘you did WHAT?’ but dissolved into ‘I love you even more than I thought possible right now’ and I just sat quietly, torn between ranking on them and reveling in the magnitude of the love they’d found in each other.

Bocca Di Lupo looked tiny from the outside, the front coral-colored bricks and industrial style windows. The interior was actually spacious and bright, the length of the building allowing for a decent amount of patrons. To the right was a bar that took up a quarter of the entire space, the bottom crafted from medium, rich honey colored wood, seamless and curved at either end, the oval top comprised of stone, round stools with rust-brown leather seats and chrome legs. The dining tables were toward the rear, and we were seated just on the other side of the bar, tucked in a corner with a wall on two sides. The table tops were the same material as the bar counter, and the chair cushions, back and seat alike, had the same covering as the bar stool seats. The lighting was amazing, a huge O-shaped chandelier with metal accents, placed right in the center of the dining area.

I took one look at the menu and raised a brow. “Lamb sweetbreads? Pigeon? Suckling pig? Really?”

Simon rolled his eyes. “I am attempting to expand your food horizons by encouraging you to sample some authentic Italian dishes.”

“Thanks, but…no thanks. The buffalo mozzarella seems safe…it’s just buffalo milk, right? And I’ll have the meatballs braised with wine and lemon, and a side of roast potatoes and wild garlic.”

“Never say I didn’t try. I’m going for the octopus, roast tomato, celery and basil salad, wild boar as my main, and a blood orange and red onion salad.”

The waiter took our order, and as we sipped our drinks Simon fidgeted in his seat for a few minutes, finally breaking the silence by clearing his throat.

“Okay, Miss Maude. I’m not sure whether I should ask or tell first.”

“You didn’t already tell?”

His head titled to the side. “Um…no. Why…oh, right, the parents. No. That just…happened. I’ve decided I want to do the asking now. So here I go. You know our wedding song is Feeling Good by Nina Simone, yes?”

“Yes. Duh. I’ve told you at least a hundred times that I love it and it’s one of my favorites and it’s perfect. And Phaedra has a friend who’s going to sing…”

“Yeah. About that…her friend’s gone off to Ireland to care for a family member who’s become ill, so she won’t be singing after all. Which leaves us without someone to sing our wedding song and…”

“Are you going to ask me to sing a Nina Simone song? THAT Nina Simone song? With the bit of scatting towards the end that I could never, ever replicate? At your wedding?”

He nodded emphatically. “Yes times four. Not like you haven’t sung it before, or am I wrong?”

“Of course I’ve sung it before. Just not in front of a room full of people at A WEDDING when it was the WEDDING SONG.”

Leaning across the table, he placed his hand over mine. “So will you do it?”

My chin fell to my chest as I sighed, then lifted my head to meet his gaze. “Sure. Why not. Not like I’ll be wearing a see-through dress and pasties while I’m doing it…OH WAIT…I WILL BE!”

I could practically see the relief wash over him. “Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. You’ll be fantastic, I know it, and it means so much, having you sing it…” He broke off as the waiter appeared with our appetizers, wiping a tear from his cheek. The buffalo milk mozzarella was delicious, and I focused on it intently so I wouldn’t notice the octopus bits on Simon’s plate and barf all over the table. The main course arrived shortly thereafter, and we ate quickly, casually exchanging stories regarding what we’d been up to while we were apart. We both ordered chocolate and marzipan balls with rum and raisins for desert, and I threw caution to the wind and chose a Bicern to go with it…a mix of hot chocolate, coffee and cream. Once that had been delivered, Simon closed his eyes, took a deep breath, then opened them.

“Now comes the telling. This is a big one, and it’s not something we’re telling anyone other than Phaedra and you and Tom until the time is right. So.” Another deep breath. “Luke and I have decided that we’d like to have a family. Together. A child. Children. Kids. Us. Together. We’ve got our egg donor, and some eggs set aside already, actually, and just last week we found our surrogate. Now this is the crazy part, the totally, completely mental bit…are you ready?” I just stared, and he snorted and continued. “It’s my ex-wife, Lisa.”

Mouth agape, head tilted, I was momentarily at a loss for words. “Are you…are you…are you fucking kidding me?”

He roared with laughter. “No. No I am not. Luke and I discussed our plans with Roland, because it’s something we thought he should be aware of so he can get used to the idea, and apparently he went home and told Lisa that we wanted to have a family and that he wished he knew how to help because I’m such a great dad already and Luke’s a great dad too and that any kid would be really, really lucky to have us as parents and...” He paused, holding back a sob, then continued, tears streaming down his face. “So Lisa talked to Jim, her husband, and they all came over and…here we are. She loves being pregnant, apparently. And she actually said she’s very happy for me, that I finally found what I was looking for, and that raising a child with someone you love is an experience everyone deserves to have and…” He put his head in his hands, weeping, and I reached across and took hold of his wrists.

“Simon…that’s incredible, and beautiful and I’m so, so thrilled for you both.”

He pulled his hands from mine in order to blow his nose in his napkin. “The plan is to use two embryos on the first go round, one fertilized by my sperm, the other by Luke’s and see what happens. And…we’re going to start trying in April. And AND, if and when we’re successful, I’m likely going to be stepping away from Prosper to be the stay-at-home parent.”

Those words hit me hardest, because I hadn’t even thought about what I’d want to do when there was a real, actual baby in the picture. Would I continue to work full time? Go part time? Not work at all? Yay, more things for me to obsess over. And what would Tom want to do? Cut back on his own work? Try and stay close to home? Or would the baby and I travel with him? I was yanked from my wool gathering by Simon tapping on my forehead.

“Maude? You okay? What’s going on in there?”

I squeezed my eyes shut, then opened them. “Well, since it’s confession time and all…I’m going off the pill next month. So, are you all ready for Christmas or what?”

“MAUDE! OH MY GOD! CAN YOU IMAGINE IF WE HAVE BABIES AT THE SAME TIME?” He realized he was shouting about my personal business in the middle of a crowded restaurant, threw a wad of cash on the table, and escorted me outside, my jacket only halfway on. “Sorry about that. Damn. But I AM SO EXCITED! Are you excited?”

“Uh…sure. Yep. Excited. Also filled with trepidation with a little horror mixed in because I have no idea what I’m doing and will probably suck at being a mom. But also in awe of the fact that there might be a little combo of Hiddleston/Gallagher genetics running amok at some point, and I can’t wait to see Tom with a baby. He’s always wanted to be a father. Hopefully I’m not too old to make that happen. Christ. Can we be done talking about this? I…”

He gave me the biggest bear hug I’ve ever had, whispering in my ear as we waited for the cab. “Don’t be stressed. I’ve got experience, and trust me, it’s the most amazing thing you’ll ever do, and you’ll be an exceptionally excellent mother. And you aren’t too old, honey. Plus, if you need a little help, you have the funds. So no worries. It will happen.”

I wiggled free as the cab pulled up to the curb. “I hope so. Shit. I promised Tom chocolate. Can we swing by a bakery on the way home?”

His elbow rose in my direction. “Twist my arm, why don’t you?”

“You sure you want to put that out there, Simon?’

He tucked his arm back into his side. “I hereby rescind my offer. A sling would really clash with the wedding theme, and inhibit my dancing considerably. Good call.”

“Damn right.”

The ride back was uneventful, both of us busy munching on some of the chocolate chip cookies we’d purchased. After trekking up the stairs we hugged goodbye in the hallway, and as I turned my key in the lock I could hear Tom speaking loudly inside. I opened the door to find him pacing in the kitchen, one hand in his hair, pushing it back over and over, the other holding his phone to his ear.

“Yes, yes, I KNOW. Okay. I’m not sure how to handle this. I know. You don’t either. It’s just so sudden. We’ll figure it out. Maude’s home. I have to go.” He tapped his phone, then looked up at me, his face paler than usual, visibly upset and unduly stressed. “It’s my father.”

My first thought was that he’d passed away, but Tom’s tone during the call didn’t quite convey that. He’d seemed agitated, short tempered…and that was my shtick for a dead parent, not his. I walked toward him, stopping a foot away, uncertain if he wanted to be touched at this juncture, speaking firmly but softly.

“What happened?”

“He’s coming to Christmas. After almost twenty years of completely ignoring all of us during the holidays, the son of a bitch is coming to Christmas.”

#your light in the mist #chapter 38

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