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#Thats why i gotta do ts myself wtf
sk3tch404 · 1 year
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Yandere Shiva General Hcs (Record of Ragnarok)
A/n: Normal schnormal human reader. Shiva is a meanie but is very affectionate. I also have only watched the anime, so I'm only making bout 6-??? Assumptions and making the gods win bc eh plot reasons. Also platonic relationship with his wives ✌ 257 words I CANNOT BELIEVE THIS GOODBYE. Failing as a writer 💀
CW: Half-proof read (Yeah yoikes but this gets real long after rereading it a thousand times over) Kidnapping, forced affection, forced marriage, isolation, neglect, and Shiva being an arse-hole but a lover boy 🤦 (??? Weirdly enough)
I also just learned that the reason why Shivas first wife isn't known is bc Paravati is the reincarnation of Sati (Shivas first wife) after she died. So technically only 3 living wives in total. (Plz correct or educate me on Hinduism if you can!)
The more you know 💁🏻
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Why he truly added you to his column of lovers is a question you may never have answered.
By the naked gods eye, you were nothing special really. Just another dead human in the heavens who is also spectating the final battles.
The afterlife isn't so bad once you've been in it for enough. Valhalla can be peaceful and honestly perfect at times when gods aren't feuding.
Once you heard the gods were holding an important final battle that would determine mankind's fate, it shocked you. Would that also determine human souls in Valhalla? What if the humans were to win? (As blasphemous as that sounded)
The ideal afterlife was supposed to be free of stress, anxiety, pain, emotional distress, and so on, but no. Of course it would never be like that. That's only wishful human thinking.
If there were no potential penalty for badmouthing high status idles, you'd say that the gods were worse than humans when it comes to ego.
Now, Shiva doesn't believe in love at first sight. The stories involving all four his wives have been a adventurous and treaded journey. He does not fall so quickly for such average beings.
But he's seen you before in the arena. Beyond the sea of humans, you stand with only yourself. You chose your seat in a secluded area and paid full attention.
As much as you seemed to isolate yourself from other souls, your eyes burn a similar passion for chaos and a strange fascination for the situation.
It caught him off guard for a second. Strange isn't it? Unlike all of these other ignorant ruffians, you enjoy a good lesson. You're not here just for the fighting and trembling anticipation that comes with the final results. You wanna observe things in educated fashion.
It's cute in a way. A lowly human soul so fixated on the final battle. If you get lucky, (his definition of lucky) he might recognize recognize you later.
Low and behold, he did. Your presence so quiet, yet so mesmerizing. Not interested in anything other than yourself and these sequence of events... How could you not be as entranced by him as he passes by? Yes a sparing surprised glance is earned, but you continue your path. How could he make you turn his way as he does for you?
Shiva will not take you so quickly. He does have a place in the arena, so he can't risk the chance of you not being in his 24/7 supervision for the first week or so. (Plus the soul threatening fight too but yk)
Though he will approach you! Somewhat teasing you in a way. Your fearful face and neck craned upwards while he is hovering over you excites Shiva. A burning dwells in his core, and you make him shiver.
It's only small talk and "hinting" at certain things to come, but it's not too forward.
"Hey, it's you! The lonely human! Yeah I know you. I could feel your eyes from across the arena y'know. For a weak soul, you really like this sort of thing huh?"
During his fight, not only did Rudra and the many people cheering for him motivate him to win, but also did your presence! The crowd is a blurry swarm of colors and movements alike, but he could practically feel your eyes on him.
He knew you couldn't stay away for long. I mean, how could you? Shiva is just perfect for you, and you've basically said you wanted to marry him based on your reaction to his fight.
While he takes his time healing his arms and various wounds, he keeps up with the battle scores and your whereabouts.
He's the god of destruction, and is very resourceful when he needs to be. His free time is filled with researching you on Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, and sometimes Saturday when his wives are busy.
By the time the gods win, Shiva has healed up pretty good thanks with the help of medical attention and the abilities of his wives.
He talks about you to his wives pretty often, and they don't mind. As long as it's what Shiva wants, then it's okay with them! Three of them has been okay so far, what's one more? The more to love right?
You're shocked with the results of the final battle. Of course this was the obvious end, but it was nice to have hope for humanity for once. People came together regardless of religion, and now all of living human kind is being erased
It seems the gods didn't care about human souls the had pre-existed in Valhalla, so you were safe for now.
Or so you thought.
You sat in your humble home, taking in the day you just had. The next thing you know, you're being forcefully taken out by a strong force.
Shiva tries to go easy on you, but you're just so damn cute, it kills him! He's super energetic and doting.
"Oh Y/n, you're so adorable. Ack, hey! Fightin now huh? I thought you saw my bout. What are you being stupid for?"
Marries you immediately. Only gives you the most enchanting and personal experience a soul could ask for.
The honeymoon is one like you've never experienced. Shiva has married four times. He knows how these things work. (Take that as you will, I don't write nsfw lmfaooo)
Shiva is painfully aware of how weak humans are compared to the average god, so he tries to not smother you too much. (AKA not smooching you once or twice every minute or so)
He really finds humans interesting, so he pokes and prods about in your personal space all the time. Privacy? Bodily autonomy? What's that?
Let's you roam free in his quarters but only let's you speak to his family and trusted ones. Rudra also finds this interesting. Shiva has fallen for a human soul? Now that's crazy talk!
Shiva would never want you to feel inferior to his wives just because they're powerful gods and you're not. You're his human. There's no one else who deserves you more than him!
But seriously, he loves learning about the ways of humans. The couple of humans who had attempted the final battle were spectacular and fought pretty damn hard, so he often wonders what others do.
"C'mon I know you're not that tired yet. The humans I've met have taken this kind of thing well before... What? Seriously can't keep up? *Sigh* Fine, get over here."
Things like modern technology isn't uncommon in Valhalla, so he'd most definitely want to know about your online life too.
Shiva is more of an active guy, so he isn't on his phone a lot. That doesn't mean he isn't inexperienced though.
He is also big on affectionate touch. Everywhere you go, he's holding some part of you. One arm around your waist and another on the top of your head.
Will MANHANDLE YOU like no tomorrow. Wherever he turns, you turn. Even when you're in the middle of reading something, or working on an arts and crafts project, he does not care. When he needs you, he will have you.
You're in front of something he needs to get to? Legit picks you up and places you aside. One the most embarrassing things to ever happen with him. You especially hate it when it's in front of his wives. They playfully laugh, giggle, and tease you for being so, as they say, cute.
They adore you. You're like another sibling to them. They also dote on you and have you help around a lot as it substitutes as hang outs.
They fight over you. A lot.
Durga is the one who takes you out a lot for physical activities. She is very ambitious and encouraging.
"Yeah, You finally got it Y/n! Whoo, you're badass compared to me."
Butters you up way too much despite the bold faced truth.
Unfortunately is the one who enforces Shiva's rules for you the hardest.
Kali is so charismatic and can be the most fun if you're rebellious. Despite her soft appearance, she is CHAOTIC. Although she stays loyal to Shiva, she doesn't mind breaking a few small rules here and there to have some fun.
She's the one who gets you in the most danger and trouble.
Shiva is VERY strict with you despite all of the freedoms he's allowed you. You're human, fragile mentally and physically. So when you are caught with Kali, he can't help but lecture the both of you.
Kali has been with him for a long time, so she takes the blame for herself. She knows she can persuade him if she tries hard enough.
Partavi is so kind and gentle. You two usually spend time inside and just casually hanging out. Cooking, learning about Hinduism, house keeping, keeping your mental and spiritual state in check, and all sorts of calming things.
Kali and Durga literally ought to tear each other apart when fighting for You attention. Partavi has to keep them in check so Shiva doesn't have to step in himself.
Complying with this new afterlife will grant you a very happy eternity and a severe case of Stockholm Syndrome.
You're surrounded by riches and loving powerful gods who want nothing more than to see you joyful. Who wouldn't want that?
Well, not you... You've lived your life! Yeah it may have been cut off short by quite a bit, but all you want to do is to finally be at peace. That shit was way more than enough. You really did not need any more issues.
Being strangely unaffected by the wipe out of Earth's humanity was just the height of it, but being kidnapped by one of the succeeding gods of the final battle was plain horrifying.
Refusing Shiva's wives affections isn't too bad in itself, but moving away from him is unacceptable.
Keeping to yourself in their shared room, not speaking to any one of them, refusing to accept their gifts and invitations, not looking after your health, pushing Shiva away when he tries to get close, and worst of all, saying you wish to not be with him.
Shiva is an emotionally driven guy, so you disobeying only displeased him further. Punishment is in order no?
Shiva won't beat you into submission, but he will intimidate and deprive you. Since you want to be so ungrateful, then maybe you should be on your own for a while huh?
You're literally thrown into a cold room with no windows and are left there for who knows how long. No one to check on you. Nothing to hinder your obvious chosen solitude. No food. No water. No one to pity you. Just the thought of sun rising and setting outside of your silent enclosure.
You hate it. You thought being alone was in every way better than being with them, but you realize that you don't like being lonely.
You despise the churning acidic bubbling in your stomach. The way your chapped lips stick together. No matter the silks and fabrics in the room, you never feel quite warm enough yet.
By the time they finally open the door, letting light pour into your room once more, you're running into whoever's arms is there.
You want- no, you need to feel something. To know that you're free of that confinement. To be free of your one and only being. Shiva's familiar warm blood pulsing through his body confirmed it.
Shiva of course, is pleased by this development. Humans will fight like hell, but will succumb one way or another.
"You miss me that much Y/n? Finally learned your lesson? Hehaha, I knew you could do it."
But if you had tried to escape? Oh hoho you are in for one big ride.
Shiva is infuriated. His rage is unlike any other. When he is hit with a hard pang of anger, all sense disappear and the only thing he can think about is how terrible the heat of emotions feel.
He is only ever at your side, so you being able to slip away can be so very rare. You won't be roaming outside his territory for very long as it would only last a couple of moments.
Was the sunlight hitting your form willing for once worth it? Was the rushing adrenaline of possibly achieving personal autonomy again worth it? The gleeful smile and feeling of heavy panting as you ran out gave you a sick, twisted feeling pleasure.
As Shiva topples you to the ground, his weight and arms hit you like a truck. If you were still alive, you'd say your soul was knocked out of you.
Too infuriated to even speak of his disappointments, he dislocates your shoulder. Your scream of agony echos throughout the secluded area, but it doesn't reach anyone.
You're taken back in for a full nights punishment. What made you think you'd be able to outrun Shiva? A final battle champion. The god of destruction. One who destroys, creates and rebuilds the world anew again.
The most damage you'll receive is some fractured bones, but nothing too bad. None of your skeletal structure is sticking out, but you can sure as hell feel the shattering.
You are of course treated. Shiva feels little sympathy for your injuries, but he does pity that sad pout you adorn in your medical clothing.
"Sorry Y/n. I was only trying to protect you, but it seemed like you couldn't understand that. I still love you so very much, so please forgive me."
This guy is the ultimate love bomber smh
Paravati, Kali and Durga don't like when you get so harshly punished like that, but they know it's what must be done.
If you ever actually get out for longer than expected, (which is mighty fucking impressive) those three will be on the hunt for you with no stop until you are found again.
And even if you had somehow gotten away, where would you go in Valhalla? God, you can't go to Zeus for help. He would laugh in your face and hand you off to Shiva like every other "lost belonging". Any other god would do the same.
Maybe Buddha could help? Then again, just because he fought for humanity doesn't mean he's your friend. Especially because it would be him against another god.
You can't return to your old home. It's where they had taken you from in the first place.
Other godly territory can be scary. Many myths and legends you might not know of, lowly salty gods may attack you, the social separation between humans and gods, and not to mention the people who inhabit the land there themselves.
Shiva would probably put a missing souls report out there for bounty if he had gotten desperate anyway.
So perhaps it's best to just, leave things as they are. Just to avoid trouble you know? Yeah, trouble.
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carlyfrombleachers · 3 years
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Liveblogging of TS6 (reputation)
Okay. Let me preface this by saying I don’t like Taylor Swift. I think she’s a boring artist, who brings close to nothing to the table. The reason I’m even listening to Reputation is because I keep getting recommended an interview of Jack Antonoff where he talks about New Year’s Day (which is a song on Reputation) and I really want to watch that but I also want to know what the fuck he’s talking about. So here we are. Don’t expect more stuff like this from me. I expect this to be just a one-off thing. Swifties, don’t fucking come after me or I will cry. The only other TS album I listened to was Lover, and I thought it was trash. Absolute garbage. And apparently this one is worse than Lover. I don’t know if I’ll regret this.
Let’s begin, I guess.
...Ready For It?
I keep thinking of that one voice clip from the Hannah Montana intro (?) where you faintly hear a girl say “are you ready for it?” and that’s my first impression just by looking at the title.
I’m hitting ‘play’ right now.
Oh nevermind, I forgot to pay Deezer this month. YouTube it is.
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Hey look, Ajay is in my recommended. Queen of reactions.
Help what is this
rockstar taylor??
what the fuck is up with the beat
chorus felt weak. this is my first opinion im not done with the track
i looked at the music video for 3 seconds and i saw a horse bye
i was distracted by the music video help i dont like this
since i looked at the music video for just a lil while i should say it looks weird. it is weird in a bad way it looks like some knockoff cyberpunk thing.
why didnt she just name this “Are You Ready For It?”
I’m... not particularly blown away by this track. It’s fine. I wouldn’t bop to it but I wouldn’t object to it playing somewhere. It’s like... it’s decent.
End Game (ft. Ed Sheeran, Future)
I don’t know who Future is.
she said reputation haha thats the name of the album
ok future is a rapper i dont listen to rap thats why i dont know him
after listening to lover i cant believe this is the same woman this is so weird
not looking forward to the ed sheeran part
“i wanna be your end game” this wasnt really what i was expecting
fuck off ed sheeran (i just reached his part)
according to some tabloid lady gaga mistook ed sheeran for a waiter? i would do the same thing if i saw this redhead fuckface on the street as well lol
“big reputation, big reputation, you and me got a big reputation” so deep!!!
I guess I should take this time to-- is she rapping?
Sorry, I got distracted. I don’t think every song needs to be this huge deep piece that must be deeply analyzed for centuries, but I do expect some interesting message or context for a track at least. If it sounds good, I’d also give it a pass. 
This one? This was boring. I would not verbally object to this playing close to me, I would just have a grossed out look on my face during the chorus.
I Did Something Bad
I keep reading the title in Akasaka Sad’s tune. You know the part where Rina says “A-ka-sa-ka sad, I’m a sucker”? I keep thinking “I did-I did something bad”. I don’t expect it to be like that.
“i never trust a narcissist but they love me” taylor talks about her fanbase
sorry to drag swifties publicly but i will forever take an opportunity to drag a swiftie
predictable antithesis use there with “i did something bad so why does it feel so good” but okay
why was taylor branded a snake again? she pretended it was “””gone””” with lover but like. it’s weird. its not like she punched kanye on stage in 2008 or something. i dont care enough to search for evidence that taylor is a snake so lol go off i guess
dont enjoy the post-chorus part where she’s like drddddddd dddddddd it feels so distracting the gunshots were more than enough
Yeah, this one was fine. My favorite up to this point, I think.
Don’t Blame Me
lol she said “dont blame me” then it buffered bye
i was showering for the past 25 minutes hello i was listening to track 10 and melodrama
i am enjoying this one kinda
“dont blame me love made me crazy” haha wait until you find out what your next era is
“i once was poison ivy now im your daisy” this is a pretty good line honestly
obligatory katy flop moment: haha taylor could hit the high notes in daisy
this sounds like a country song especially in the chorus i dont know what to really make of it
“loooord save me” this is why your female fans are called horse girls
This was... pretty good. The chorus weirds me out still, but it had its good moments. It was nice.
Delicate
stop saying reputation in the reputation album
this autotune voice bits of hers are so distracting
i say as i listen to how i’m feeling now by charli xcx
yes i did just roast myself. gotta leave the swifties with nothing
god the music video for this track has 400m views this woman is making my faves look like indie stars LOL
I keep getting distracted because this song is boring. It’s... okay. I guess. The music video was pretty cute. Nothing caught my attention in the track, but it sounds like gym music. It would play on a gym owned by a 30-something white woman during the yoga classes and you know it.
Look What You Made Me Do
We’ve all heard this song. I’m gonna listen to it and then be done with it.
I guess I’ll just watch the music video.
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ONE BILLION VIEWS????????????
Okay. I watched the music video.
Really? All the fem guys dancing with her?
I’m not going to sit here and be like “fem guys are BAD and should all die and never be represented” because… lol. But it is kind of annoying how it was literally just fem guys dancing with her and doing all those faces because you KNOW she was looking for the impressionable gays to go “omg taylor progressive!!!!” and go talk about it on social media.
But am I saying that because I don’t like Taylor? Yes. But that doesn’t make my point less valid.
The music video was pretty good, the production on this track is really good (thank you Jack Antonoff xx) and the track itself is good. Not outstanding or perfect or a serve, it’s good.
Also the ending with all her previous eras? That was cool. The uncool part is most of the “look how rich I am” parts… because we all know you’re rich, Taylor. Nice SFX.
So It Goes…
i got an ad whyyyyyyy
fuck this shit i cant keep up with what shes saying im pulling genius out for this one
this is not lyrically deep i can tell already from genius
im not a fan of love songs i already have CRJ to cover that base and Lorde covers breakup songs I guess and this song is just. boring. lol
Nothing really shocking or noteworthy here, it’s just.. okay.
Gorgeous
I got another ad FUCK
i got a boss baby ad help
god boss baby really was something huh i completely forgot about that
why am i talking about boss baby
okay. reputation
why did a baby say gorgeous
HELP i am so disappointed this is the one track with the lyric video and god this is disappointing
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i saw this and i was like “oh shit shes gonna talk about how its gonna be gorgeous when u die” or smth and
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lol. LOL. the depth is nonexistent and the bar is in hell
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who wrote this? you lied
This song is so boring, LOL. I expected so much from it and was instantly disappointed when the pre-chorus hit. You had everything on your plate and you ate the plate itself. Girl. What the hell. Why. You could’ve given us an anthem about hating your man, and you took the easy route.
Getaway Car
im intrigued
okay im listening and this sounds very jack antonoff? the shotgun thing made me immediately go o_o
it felt a bit weak at the end but at the start i was enjoying it quite a lot… i think this is my fave
I enjoyed this one quite a lot :) It was pretty good but not an amazing masterpiece. It was better than LWTMMD and that’s all I have to say.
King Of My Heart
sounds boring haha
taylor keeps putting these trap beats in things sister youre not lorde LOL
yeah this is kinda boring
WAIT A MINUTE NEW YEARS DAY IS THE LAST TRACK???? IM GONNA HAVE TO STICK UNTIL THE END oh my god please no
i dont. i .. i knew this would be happening but i didnt expect it to be the last one
i guess the timing is accurate ha ha ha ha
i just heard ariana grande
I keep hearing Ariana Grande on this track. Is that good? I don’t know.
Dancing With Our Hands Tied
why are there so many songs in this fucking album
the beat is.. okay. it is catchy
oh i like this i think. its pretty nice
the chorus is nice. yes. i do kind of enjoy this
Yeah, I liked this one. Pretty good writing, and it sounds great.
Dress
wtf is this song why is it so horny
horny taylor is weird stop being horny please
this song is okay i would not revisit it because its just weird. do not like this!!!
when carly rae jepsen says slide on through my window it is funny but when taylor sings i bought this dress so you could take it off i die
oh that second of silence was really good
[looks at the producer] [it’s jack antonoff] :)
This song weirds me out. I don’t like it. It had its moments production-wise but it was... weird.
This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things
I expect good things from this. With a title like that? Give me a bop.
Currently not being a bop.
Okay, it was cute. Nothing amazing. Just… fine. Cute attempt.
oh i liked the spoken part thats what i expected from this song
Call It What You Want
this is about genitalia this is my prediction
It was not about genitalia.
This song is pretty good if you remove all the mentions to her lover and her man and her baby, which are all the same person, I guess.
This is disappointing.
JACK ANTONOFF BACKING VOCALS
I LOVE YOU JACK
umm anyways
OH HE DID IT AGAIN IM GONNA CRY i love this man
I expected so much from this track and the chorus just… disappointed me.
JACK!!! I LOVE YOU!!!! KEEP SINGING!!!!!
i love this man im gonna cry
The highlight of this song is the part where Jack Antonoff sings.
New Year’s Day
wow the reason why im doing this shit
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look at him. :)
this song was cute. nothing special. just cute. very okay.
just. okay. yeah. pretty fine.
nothing special.
Final Thoughts On The Album
It was better than Lover.
I expected this to be a concept album, all about the drama she’s gotten into? But it was just boring love songs with some extra flair. I expected great things from this album, having only heard LWYMMD from it before this. A concept album that’s just an answer/clapback to everyone’s who wronged her à la Yellow Flicker Beat (I know it’s for a movie but that song slaps and I don’t know a thing about Hunger Games) would’ve been PERFECT but it was just... love songs. I need Taylor to stop singing about love and start serving us big meals.
I would not like to revisit this. Like, 5/10. It could’ve been a lot better, but it wasn’t because you’re too afraid to cross some lines, Taylor.
Final Ranking:
Dancing With Our Hands Tied
Getaway Car
Look What You Made Me Do
I Did Something Bad
Don’t Blame Me
New Year’s Day
Call It What You Want
...Ready For It?
This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things
So It Goes...
End Game (feat. Ed Sheeran, Future)
Dress
Delicate
King Of My Heart
Gorgeous
taylor flop stream gone now
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ts-indonesia · 5 years
Text
Episode 1 - "Time to put on a bra and take some selfies." - Leigh
Episode 1 saw eighteen players, some fresh faces, and some veterans arrive on the Indonesia beaches, ready to play and ready to win. On a somewhat quiet Obor tribe, Leigh/Trent bonded over the age difference on the tribe (with a cunning plan reliant on using the word ‘lit’) and Anabel/Trent begun to form a bond that would survive the test of time.
On the Cahaya tribe, Matt/Jess feared the casting of one another, and Julian arrived plucky and ready to avoid another prejury experience, determined to improve. Owen/Stoner quickly formed HOS 22: Bermuda, and set to work spreading their connections across the tribe, forming at trio with Julian.
After a decisive victory in the Scavenger Hunt, it was revealed the returnees would have to send two returnees to the other tribe as “infiltrators” casting a sole vote. In an attempt to force the result, Julian went “offline”, in an attempt seen-through by his fellow tribe mates, but one that was ultimately successful, with Owen & Julian sent over as infiltrators.
At Obor’s tribal council, Evan quickly emerged as an easy vote, for his minimal challenge contribution. Two key alliances formed, a newbie majority alliance of Trent/Chris O/Leigh/Anabel/Lorelei and a girls’ alliance of Lorelei/Anabel/Leigh, with Anabel armed with an idol to boot.
As expected, Evan was sent out unanimously, but not before Julian trashed on the Cahaya tribe during tribal council... in a tribal seen... by the Cahaya tribe. With Evan out, the torches still inspiring such hate, and the infiltrators returning... that drew round one to a close.
MATT
first confessional give me idol? 
also hi Jones
OWEN
okay so im walking onto the boat.... my hair is thinning, my skin is getting wrinkly, im ancient at this point. nonetheless im back for like the sixth time. or seventh, honestly who can keep track anymore. i see these like cute little new people. ANABEL's vid is AMAZING gay icon, lorelei legend likes pokemon mystery dungeon,  Leigh is near chicago, like... i literally love all these new players but then i realize NONE OF THEM WILL BE ON MY TRIBE SKADSFJH. instead? im stuck with crazy ppl. there's julian who i voted out premerge in the season I won, and Matt who was in my most recent season nnn but NOT the matt I worked with in that game. and of all people CHRIS STONER LMAO. to be fair, chris isn't that bad bc I know he'll work with me hopefully but also I know he's a good player and wouldn't hesitate to cut me out. thank god olivia and jess are here tbh. omg and just when I thought it couldn't get any worse.....a furry shows up. WHAT THE FUCKKKKKK lmao I remember foxx back from the old old days and he seems scary :(((( good news is julian said him and isaac haven't ever gotten along and that isaac has voted him out twice :') so that might be good. and i'm fairly sure stoner and jess would have my back rn i just need to talk more to them. but for real, as soon as there's a swap or something if I survive that long? bye bye returnees :) i dont see myself getting very attached to anyone at the start so ill just do my best to ride out this beginning and maybe have some fun
LEIGH
I'm looking forward to seeing how long our tribe chat is just "Hey *Tribe Member's Name*!" 
I think it could go on a while.
OWEN
chris: ditching u for the other stoner tho chris: tumblr needs an all stoner f2... 7:23 PM me: thats ok im ditching u for the gay girl from the first post me: but for now? u and me <3 7:23 PM chris: deal stoner and I rlly did speak this into existence....... it'll happen
LEIGH
So this tribe has literal children on it. 15, 16 years old. I might have to backstab ACTUAL CHILDREN!  How do I even fit in with them? Trent suggested we could buy fidget spinners.  I said maybe yoga pants and a crop top?  There are people here BORN AFTER 9/11!!!  What the fuck I didn't even know you could be born after 9/11 and be out of kindergarten. What year is it?
EVAN
Just met some other castaways, they seem pretty chill.
FOXX
What's up. So this fox has returned after an eternity of a hiatus with more grey in his muzzle and hopefully some self-awareness to go with it. I played some pretty solid games in the past but after taking a long time lurking and sort of forgetting Tumblr Survivor Crooks asked if I wanted to play despite not knowing I have played before. That's how old and irrelevant of a has-been I am. Back from the dead. I'm glad my star has faded and I can go in with a blank slate. My biggest concern is that I am not on my anxiety medication so my social interactions, especially on call, will be a lot more stilted and I'm terrified this will impair my judgment but we'll see. Right now I'm not trying to come off as a huge strategist. I made an intentionally crappy intro video, made fun of myself, and just tried to be funny without coming off too weird/desperate etc. Almost like I'm not taking this too seriously. However, already I'm noticing a patterns in how people on my tribe are. I have no fucking clue who these mammals are. People will have extensive conversations about people, twists, running jokes, etc and I'm totally lost. That hiatus really did fuck with my ability to ingratiate myself with this community. That will be a huuuuge advantage coming to dealing with the newbies since I can leverage that to not seem so threatening but right now I think I'm doing a fair job being friendly and making people laugh. I hope. God. So my thoughts on my tribemates thus far: Stoner: Vaguely know who this guy is. Aptly named. He's clearly blazed as hell but I can tell he's bright and likable. Says "oh shit" a lot and he seems like depsite his facade he's probably someone I can work with. Isaac: We talked about Overwatch a bit and he seems nice but he's not coming on my radar too strong. Jess: Definitely made a fairly strong impression on me since we're similar ages, Francophone, and we bonded over our mutual detest and hatred of furries and then I calmly sneak in the fact I am a furry an hour later and holy shit I was trying so hard to not bust into tears. She's funny and likable and seems like she's someone I could work with. Matt: Talked a bit about me coming back. Very little in group call. Michael: Talked a fair amount about D&D and made some fun Upside Down jokes. Seems like we have a lot in common but him being a different time zone could prove hard to keep up with. Being the outlier on Time Zones is playing on Hard Mode. Olivia: Love her! We bonded over animals and she seems like a total sweetheart and I definitely wanna share pics of my cat with her some more! Owen: We talked a bit about literature and it was fun. Definitely seems intelligent and he's someone I know a bit about from Olympics. In an ideal world I'd want to work with Stoner, Jess, Olivia, & Michael but everything in on fire. Also, no luck on the idol so fuck me I guess
JESS
So... first night has been interesting? I was going to do your typical "first impressions" confessional but... FOXXX or whatever the fury's name is.... is playing too hard too fast. Am I being a Paranoid Patty and reading this the WRONG WAY entirely? Possibly. HOWEVER... It's been less than 5 hours since we were thrown into this hell hole of a game (The hosts are lovely individuals but we all know this is about to get insane) and he's telling me if I want to make a move that he's my guy? Ummm.... WE HAVEN'T EVEN GOTTEN OUR FIRST IMMUNITY YET? I'M NOT THINKING MOVES RIGHT NOW? I BARELY CAN REMEMBER YOUR NAME!
MICHAEL
https://youtu.be/Swisjdq1R4s
OLIVIA
Have I befriended a furry???????? Is this real life????? Is he actually a furry or just really in deep on this joke? Why are there so many Dylans in orgs? Also fucking goddamnit I like EVERYONE HERE I just wanna be friends with all y’all damn. All of the newbies are so adorable and seem so excited and unknowing to the pain that’s gonna come :’) Annabelle especially like my wig flew with that intro! I wanna meet them all. Also wtf is with the torches I WANNA KNOW ALREADY! Anyways that’s all I’m excited for this season. Owen and I renewed the o alliance :-) and Jess seems cool as hell I really clicked with her and the furry. Michael seems sweet and I already know Julian from Mykonos, the absolute crackhead. Real sweetie tho hopefully we’re friends. I hope I’m not coming off as too insane I was so nervous on the phone call with the tribe :( it was so fun but I felt like every time I said something it fell flat I felt so awkward abhhhhhahshsjaj. Anyhoo yay! New season!
Should I write the rest of my confessionals in japanese? Neko. Boom
JESS
So coming into this game with a TS under my belt is different... I still have no expectations whatsoever BUT I do know how HARD people go for in these games and I'm planning to go just as hard. The first night was wild. Everyone on my tribe except for Matt and Julian were lively on the tribe call. Everyone seemed pretty cool and super... out there.. I think Isaac might be the one to watch on my tribe. He's been around the block and knows most people on my tribe (new and old). WHICH IS WHY.. I'm going to try my best and get super close to him. I need to make sure I'm not disposable to these "older players" and as asset to these "newer" players. I just know need to cool my jets on the whole socializing bit in the main chat (Yes I know it's literally day 1). I want to be as irrelevant as possible so no one thinks I'm a threat but no one really wants to get rid of me either. Gotta focus on those INDIVIDUAL RELATIONSHIPS. Hopefully these other players with more TS's under their belts become bigger shields than me because if not... yikes on yikes.
ROB
I like everyone so far. Evan is giving me a few red flags because he’s only giving me one word answers, so i might take that into consideration when voting.
FOXX
We had a very fun group call with the tribe last night. Definitely haven’t laughed that much in a while. Love my tribe thus far so I hope we can keep the good vibes going. Jess & Stoner are people I feel like have talked with me the most Nd Olivia, Owen, & Michael are also friendly so I think I have options. One thing I’ve noticed is how casual and sociable this tribe is. Nothing is more frustrating than a tribe full of overserious gamebots (*cough* Selwyn *cough*) but it’s a group of funny and chill people. It’s gonna be a great game!
OLIVIA
I love these hosts 🙂 HATE the idol system but honestly it doesn’t change much I’ve never gotten an idol before and probably never will so it won’t change my gameplay lmao
I like Isaac a lot too! Forgot to say. But I’m also a little wary of him because I know he’s very experienced
JULIAN
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PKDvx7VxRC8
ANABEL
well. yesterday i found an idol on my second guess. and made two new friends. so yesterday was great. today was bad. i outed myself. my mom heard me tell my eyebrow lady that i was gay. this is a sad confessional and i wish i wasn’t so loud. im real fucking sad. sorry. but at least i have an idol and some friends.
LEIGH
Time to put on a bra and take some selfies.
I'm glad I shaved today for that tattoo selfie.
OLIVIA
There’s an alliance I’m not in isn’t there
Why am I so FUCKING awkward
ANABEL
im so fucking good at survivor like... good lord. trent and i are like best friends already (see, i knew this would happen, i always meet a nice old usually straight man and we become friends, it's like the hallmark of my survivor experiences) and we came up w a plan where i am gonna try and seduce evan and rob and make them my lil minions so im gonna lie to them and tell them that im a cheerleader bc that's hot right?? so ya my womanly charms will be utilized to their fullest potential. go me.
MICHAEL
https://youtu.be/aAqEUHoyy78
LEIGH
Can we talk about how bullshit it is to have "Lipstick in your tribe's color" when we're yellow and they're RED?  Honest to god might as well have "Lemon in your tribe's color" to make it fair.
Alex coming in with bold capslock "MAKE SURE EVERYONE ON YOUR TEAM HAS SUBMITTED AT LEAST ONE THING" ... Just DM Evan directly my dude.
OLIVIA
Feeling much better about this game today than I was last night I think I was just spiraling 🥰 we’re doing really well on the challenge and I hope we win!! Two people messaged me saying I’m doing great on the challenge and idk how to respond. Just tryna make sure we don’t lose I will NOT be the first vote out. Newbies go hard on scavenger hunts but I go even harder 😈
LORELEI
Ok so! I'm super bummed that obor lost the challenge, I really thought we would win! Now we have to get rid of someone and it sucks but I feel like we all know who it has to be. It's not even personal, it's just the fairest thing and the best thing for our tribe. Also, alliances are forming! I like Anabel, Leigh and Trent so I'm with them but I'm gonna try to connect with everyone so I'm not on the outskirts. I hope that the boys haven't formed an all boys alliance bc if they have, then the girls could be in danger. That's it for now!
STONER
guess I’ll follow Alex crook’s rules... https://youtu.be/ndsfCdjtcQI
Not much, about to sleep! https://youtu.be/v12a2AbklVw
MICHAEL
https://youtu.be/4inKBNkg87M
JESS
It's 2:30am so WHY NOT post ANOTHER confessional? Am I right? Honestly, we won which I'm BEYOND THANKFUL for. I hate tribal and I can now at least say I wasn't first boot. THANK GAGA. I'm just really trying to solidify things with Michael right now. I think out of everyone on my current tribe I can honestly see myself making a run at this game with him (at least up until merge). I offered him the prospect of sharing idol clues (it's literally the only collateral I have at the moment) so hopefully this doesn't bite me in the fucking ass. Other than Michael I was kind of hoping to somehow get closer to both Julian and Matt (plot twist I know). Matt has hosted me before and it's no secret he is a founding father of the "I Hate Jess" Club. However, these two seem to be the odd men out right now. They aren't overly socializing with people so there's a high chance they'll be taken out if our current tribe loses. HOWEVER.. I see potential numbers in them. So I can't let that happen. As of right now both Foxx and Stoner seem to be the ones to watch out for. I just can't let them think or know... that I know that about them. Stoner gives me mega "I say the same things to everyone" vibes. He's clearly playing a strong social game so far. I just need to play dumb and ensure that he thinks he can control/trust me. Honestly, as soon as he doesn't see value in me I have no doubt he's gonna cut me. Foxx on the other hand, just seems like he's playing too hard. He's another guy who I strongly believe is going to drop me as soon as I have no value to him. I'm just going to have to have to lay low and be dumb. Owen scares me shitless. He's giving me PTSD from my last season because homeboy is playing a strong contender game. He's definitely a pick to win. He's another person who I'm going to have to try and pretend I'm under their spell. Am I playing too hard too fast? I'm not entirely sure. I'm just going to slow my role a bit and see what happens
MATT
What’s Up? WHAT’S UP?!?!?!?  how dare you ask me such a ludicrous question.  Alright so first real general confessional of the game here.  I wanna eventually try and record some video confessionals, but that’s if i have the time. but for today, we’re good with a text.   So starting off the game on the Cahaya Tribe, which consists of entirely returnees.  So right off the bat it makes nervous bc i’m really not around much in the community.  Yeah i’m in a few VL’s and i played once before, but i really don’t know anyone.  So being the odd one out for that reason was a real fear for a little bit. Looking at my tribe, there are a few names that stood out the most to me.  Owen stood out bc we both played Kuwait, and even tho we never met each other, we still have that little connection.  Chris motherfucking Stoner is here too!!  Chris is such a chill dude.  we played together once before and i voted him out pre swap.  But that game was so long ago, and i really don’t think he cares (i know i dont).  So i’m looking forward to reconnecting with him.  Jess is also here!! Jess and I had met previously because i hosted her in Celestial Komnata, and we had some rough misunderstandings there.  But months have passed and I know that I am well over it bc i frankly don’t care.  But i feel like she still probably cares which will not be good for me. Michael was the last person that stood out to me.  Not because I know him, or know of him.  But because he’s the only Non-North American in the cast, which means if i can stay up late and socialize with him, he might favor me over other When i looked at the other tribe, i think the only person i know is Anabel?  We played together once, i hosted her, so we have somewhat of a connection that if we swap together, i hope that works in my favor.   So on the first night of the game, i was very busy with Celestial All stars premiere, so i didn’t get to talk as much as i would’ve liked.  which resulted in me telling jones on call like 5 times that i’m gonna be first boot.  But the first night, i talked with everyone (to some degree) except Issac bc i forgot Issac was here.   The torch twist thing i have no idea what it’s going to be and it worries me.  My first thought is that it somehow would result in a third tribe bc there were six torches.  so someone would light a torch and be placed on that tribe. But it’s too early to figure out what they even mean and i’m sure as the game progresses.  
LEIGH
Woooo so what's happened.  Well, we lost the challenge and it wasn't even close. I haven't looked at the spreadsheet to see the final scores but I feel like Me, Trent, and Anabell did the most work.  I talked to a few people last night and put Evan's name out there cuz I know most people are too scared to say a name first and I feel comfortable enough about my position to be the one to say a name that most people should agree with. A mutual alliance formed between me, Chris, Trent, Anabell, and Lorelei.  Within it, an all girls 3 alliance formed which I'm super happy to be part of.  I'm sure Trent will be paranoid about that sooner or later so hopefully Chris and I can make him feel confident.  Trent is sharing idol guesses with me so I'm hoping that means I'm like the closest person to him right now.  I like the number of options I have so far. 
I feel like Facebook might be falling out of style so maybe these youngin's don't even have it or aren't familiar with Facebook ORGs.  The only other people here who know my history as far as I know are Foxx and Chris, and I hope neither of them bring it up. If I can stay UTR that'd be nice.  Also, I think I need to stop capitalizing letters/using punctuation if I wanna fit in with these kids.  Did I already confessionalize that? Not sure.
Apparently Lorelei missed the HII thing day one haha oh well. I'm compiling guesses from me, Chris, and Trent. Hopefully I'll get them from the girls too. I'm not showing the girls' guesses to Chris though. I don't think he'll be mad at me for it. We gotta play close to the vest sometimes yo
TRENT
So far I think the game is going alright. My tribe is incredibly quiet for some reason but I guess that isn't too bad. I made a connection with Anabel and Leigh pretty early on. Decided to suggestion and alliance and both we in so I added Chris and Lorelei so we had a majority. This is the alliance I wanted from the beginning. I wanted the older people to stick together and then add in one young one. I think it's a pretty solid idea. Ive been messaging both kenny and dylan as well. I don't want an alliance with them, but I would like for them to like me and want me to stay in. I also think im getting along pretty well with the two infiltrators right now. Julian was spilling all kinds of info about his tribe to me this morning and then me and owen connected really well. Hopefully this will help me in the future if there is a split soon.
OLIVIA
Jess was hinting that her, foxx, stoner, and I should get together and I said we’d make a nifty cool group. A NIFTY COOL GROUP WHAT THE FUCK IS A NIFTY COOL OLIVIA
ISAAC
This twist can become SO detrimental. And I’m so MAD Owen went over there first because that bitch is unbelievably charismatic. Hopefully it paints a bigger target on him but like it’s whatever. I like my tribe. We seem chill and I seem to vibe the most with Olivia and Jessica Messica. Foxx is cool. Julian is....Julian ig. Matt has yet to talk to me so that’s a wig ig. Michael seems nice but ngl I get kinda bored when I try to talk to him? He seems very gamebot-y which could be frightening but idk he’s not my biggest problem atm. I’m terrified of Owen - he’s unbelievably charismatic and has the ability to twist people around his finger so like I’m gonna keep my eye on him and I’m not gonna let him out of my sight. With that being said I do wanna see him live for at least a little while for meat-shield purposes. Anyways I hope I do well this game but 👀 I have a sinking feeling.
KENNY
So yeah.. it seemed like a pretty laxxed day and Evan was the vote. How true is that? Idk but I have to trust strangers. But just heard he through my name out like 20 minutes ago, with less than 3 hours to go. So I just hope everyone’s being honest 😭
OWEN
what’s up? Everything :’) I couldn’t help as much in the scav hunt as I liked because I was living my life. But thankfully we won anyways bc my tribe kicked ass! I still contributed some and I made sure to keep talking to people. I still love olivia, and matt has been fun to talk to. Don’t rlly know why but foxx seems hard to get to know. And not big into michael rn either. I think I will stick with Julian and chris, hopefully can pull in jess and olivia to do something if we lose. Chris mentioned that both him and jess DO like foxx so we will see.... The main thing is that this twist worked out perfectly for me!!!! I couldn’t call when we were decided and I REALLY wanted to go. Thankfully I was able to take advantage of the majority vote thing and pretend like I wasn’t online hehe and by some miracle I got picked to go. MEANT TO BEEE and let me say I was right, I do love this tribe so much more than my own for some reason. Trent is great, Annabel and I are talking like I wanted, the Chicago girl and the Pokémon mystery dungeon girl. It’s so good over here, but the biggest surprise has been chris o. I really like him and could see myself working well with him if we swap. The only thing is that Julian said he was sketchy sometimes..... hehe so down the road I might have to tell chris o that Julian is after him :~) but I don’t need to snake too hard yet, for right now I’m a crocodile lookin like a log. Vote should be easy on Evan from what I’ve heard but if it changes? I’ll be living for the drama!
LORELEI
It looks like Evan is the consensus. I feel really bad though because it's not his fault. He tried to plead his case with me by saying that he wasn't the only one that was inactive, but that doesn't change the fact that he contributed the least. I know it's the fair thing to do but I feel bad about it. Voting out people is so not fun, I really hope we win the next challenge so I won't have to do this again.
EVAN
I’m pretty sure I’m fucked. I’ve been trying to get people to vote Kenny but idk fuck
KENNY
“I know I’M voting Evan = I might be voting Evan but I know others are voting you”. Or am I being paranoid
JULIAN
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GaH8l2R-Xt0
MATT
i feel like i did pretty good on the scavenger hunt.  i managed to scoop up a bunch of items that were left over and some that were high points.  so i do feel good about my performance and think i pulled my weight.  Speaking of pulling weight...Julian is...there.  I think he only submitted one item which was the Vine.  I mean i get you have work and are busy, but like...most of us were the same?  even issac who was celebrating his birthday did more.   after challenge results we got on call in the tribe chat (olivia, chris, michael, myself). and we were talking about the infiltrator twist and the challenge results.  We agreed to have myself and Olivia go, but we needed 5 for a majority.  Julian shows up and says he “might wanna go tbh”.  and then disappears.  We’re on call laughing bc we wanna submit this and not randomize it, so someone who isn’t here gets forced to go.  BUT JULIAN won’t talk in tribechat even tho we’re all like, “hey we’ll take turns and you can go next time.”. but no.  Julian is only talking in olivia’s pm’s and she’s telling us whatever he’s saying. eventually the hour is up, and julian got randomized to go.  that fucker strong armed us into randomizing and he still went god damnit.   I think that call was good for my game because we were just chatting for like 1.5 hours about the game stuff and people.  After michael/chris left the call it was just Olivia and myself on call and we stayed on for another hour and a half(????? ish??? probably less i can’t remember).  But that was a nice call and i think helped start to solidify a bond.  Olivia is someone i can see myself working with in this game.  Same goes for Michael and Chris.  I feel like that call group was pretty natural and we got along really well.  I’m too nervous to initiate any kind of alliance talk, but i know it’s gonna have to happen eventually.  i’m sure alliances already exist on the tribe and i’m obviously not in them.  I think for starters, i need to work on conversations a bit more, because they are somewhat weak right now.  My goal for the future is to work on olivia, michael, chris and owen.  Those are the people i feel most good about.  Foxx is cool but idk it seems hard to gel with them.  Julian is cracked and i hope he’s our first boot.  and the four of us on call forgot issac was on the tribe so that’s not good for him. i think i’m in a decent position for now, but i’m not gonna count my chickens before they hatch (i think that’s the saying idfk)
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