#Three months later that he had called me cute and i died. I cant handle people calling me sweet or cute or nice ... | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ogwivia · 6 years

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Want You Back- Youngblood Stories 1

{This is a set of original stories by Olivia Franklin. Each one is inspired by a song off the album Youngblood. I hope you enjoy, and if you have ideas for the other stories please let me know}

Here you sat, an unopened letter in front of you. It had your name written on it in that handwriting you had grown to know and love; he had even drawn a little heart beside it. How ironic that he would put this in a letter, after all, a letter is what started your relationship. Here you sat, trying to make yourself open it; but you were so afraid of what it might contain. As you sit there contemplating, your mind wanders back through everything that has happened over the past couple weeks.

When you woke to the sound of your alarm blaring on the bedside table, your first thoughts were not happy. You laid there for a few moments trying to gain your bearings and muster up the will to be awake. Then, suddenly, your brain remembered why the alarm was going off and you quickly shot up out of the bed. Your boyfriend Luke had called a couple days earlier to ask if you would go watch the sunrise with him; mornings are something you absolutely despise, but he makes it all worth it.

You quickly get up, throw on some sweatpants and your favorite t-shirt adorned with roses, brush your teeth, wash your face, then head downstairs to await Luke’s arrival. This outfit did not make you look super cute, but this was Luke. You could show up wearing a trash bag and he would say you deserve to be walking the red carpet at the Met Gala.

He pulls up to your house and you quickly jump into the car. You are reminded why you love this man so much when you see that he is also adorning sweatpants and a t-shirt. He gives you a quick kiss on the cheek and you to drive away, bound for the mountains.

When you get up to the top of the mountain, Luke lays out a blanket. He lays down and pulls you into his arms, all is as it should be. You find yourself wishing this moment could never end; everything was perfect.

“Hey, I want to tell you something”, Luke says breaking the silence.

“Okay”, you respond, a little nervous about what is coming next.

“I love you”

As you snap back to the present for one moment, you find this memory has brought a tear to your eye. You wish more than anything in the world you could go back and tell yourself to just say it back to him, but at that moment you couldn’t. You wanted to say it, so badly you did, but because of your past, you couldn’t make the words come out of your mouth. Your brain then painfully continues the memory.

“Luke I-“

“You what”

“You’re so sweet, but I-“

The expression in his eyes changed to one of deep hurt, you could see it in his eyes.

“Don’t you love me too?”

This question pained me so much. He knew you did, he knew the answer to this question.

“Luke, I’m sorry I just can’t. I’m not ready yet, you know why I can’t”

“I can’t believe this”

“Luke I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. I’m trying to be over it, I really am. I just need a little bit more time.”

“It’s been three months, when is going to be enough time? Am I just supposed to wait forever for you to be ready?”

He rolled over releasing you from his arms. You tried to hold the tears back, but you couldn’t. His words broke your heart. You laid there silently as the sun slowly began to creep above the mountains, but you found no joy in this scenery.

Snapping back to the present, your eye makeup is now completely smeared on your face. You clutch the letter so tightly that you are not sure how it didn’t disintegrate between your fingers. Why, why couldn’t you have just said it back to him that day; three simple words that could’ve saved you a world of hurt. Your sorrow suddenly turns to anger as you remember why you couldn’t make the words come out of your mouth. Your mind takes you back to another memory, three months before the day of your mountain trip to be exact.

Your parents died when you were very young and none of your family members would take you in, because of this you were sent to a group home. They did their best to care for you, but you never felt very special or loved. You spent most of your childhood trying to prove you were worth something, afraid that no one would ever love or want you. After all, if your own family didn’t want you, why would anyone else? You spent your whole life dreaming of the day you turned 18 and could move out, but for now, you were stuck here; you had no choice but to make the best of it.

You were so desperate to feel loved and wanted that you took the first offer that came along. Darren seemed like a knight in shining armor to you when you first met him during your freshman year of high school. You were so desperate to be loved and wanted that you let him treat you like trash. But you stayed, you stayed because you feared if you ever left that you would be alone forever. Eventually, your mind began to wonder if this was what love was all about. You were only 6 months old when your parents passed away, so you had no idea what real love looked like. At some point, you began to accept that you were stuck, he was probably right, no one else could ever love someone as broken as you.

This was it, this was why you couldn’t say those three words back to Luke. You loved him with all your heart but growing up your mind had been trained to think love meant something very different. When you finally got away from Darren, you made a vow that you wouldn’t say those words again until they meant something again.

When you were seven, the girl’s home you lived in took a trip to Australia; this was where you met Luke. Being so young, you thought of him as a playmate and nothing more. You and Luke played together on the beach almost every day. At the week’s end, you two exchanged addresses and promised to write each other frequently.

You two did your very best to keep in touch and became great friends through the years. Now the little boy you met on the beach was grown up and touring the world with his three best friends. Around the time you began dating Darren, the two of you lost contact. He was busy touring and you were busy trying to graduate high school. After a while, you gave up any hope of expecting a letter and figured Luke had moved on with his life and left you. Goodbye was all you had ever known, so why would you expect this to be any different.

After breaking up with Darren, you ran all the way back to the group home, not knowing what to do or how to handle your emotions. After composing yourself again, you decided you needed to do something, anything! You were not sure what made you do it, but you decided to sit and write a letter to Luke. He always seemed to know how to cheer you up, but would he even reply? Would he even care? It didn’t matter, you had to try.

Looking back now, you are so glad you wrote that letter that day.

A couple of weeks later you received a reply from Luke with tickets to his concert in your town. You went, saw him, and the rest was history. You guys exchanged numbers and from then on phone calls and facetime were a nightly occurrence. After a few weeks of talking, Luke asked you if you would be interested in starting a relationship. At first, you were hesitant, after everything that happened was it a good idea to do this again? Despite your worries, you agreed. Agreeing to be his girlfriend was the best decision you ever made.

Life was so amazing and simple back then, why did that all have to change. Your mind snaps back to that fateful day in the mountains.

You had never seen Luke so upset before, it hurt you to see him this way. The ride home was silent and torturous. He kept his eyes glued to the road, never looking at you. Once you were dropped off at your house, he sped away. As soon as you got in the door your heart shattered; to make matter even worse, it had just began raining. ‘

Through the tears, you heard your doorbell rang; you pulled yourself together and went to answer it.

“Luke”, you said with a mix of confusion and sorrow, “what are you doing here”

“We need to talk”

“Yea, we do”

“I love you, with all of my heart, but I can’t wait around forever for you to be ready to love me back”

“Luke, you know why I can’t say it, I’ve told you a million times why I can’t say. I thought you understood, I thought you were okay with that.”

“I was okay, I really was, but it’s getting a bit ridiculous at this point. You should be over it, it’s time to move on with your life”

“Luke how could you even say that”

“Wait I- I shouldn’t have said that I-“

“You know, I thought you were different. I opened my heart again, which took a lot out of me, and I thought you would protect it and care for it. I thought you were different, but you’re not. I get it, I get it that I’m broken and come with a lot of baggage; but why can’t you just help me carry it until I’m ready to let go.”

There is dead silence, and in that silence, made one of the worst decisions of my life.

“Luke, I don’t think this is ever going to work. I’m not ready to move on and you can’t wait any longer.

Maybe we weren’t meant to be together, maybe this a sign. I- I think you should go”

You stood there waiting for him to say something, anything, but no words came out of his mouth. It seemed as if you were going to explode in tears, but you held back. Without another word, a teary-eyed Luke walked back to his car and left.

Now here you were, two torturous months later, staring at this letter in your hand. Over the past two months, you had done nothing but cry. You could muster up the courage to take down the picture of you and Luke, yet every time you stared at them, your heart shattered a little bit more. You missed him so much that it caused you physical pain, but at the same time, you knew you still weren’t ready to say those three fateful words.

The main thought crossing your mind was that Luke deserved to be with some who could say that to him, someone who wasn’t so broken.

He deserved someone who wasn’t you.

You fully expected to never hear from him again, after everything you said why would he ever want you back?

You had finally accepted that you would be alone forever.

Then you checked the mail this morning. In it were bills, a couple magazines, and the letter you now held in your hand. You had just begun to move on, maybe it would be better not to read it.

No, no. This was not how the story was going to end. Gathering up every bit of courage you had left, you opened the letter and began reading.

My love,

I know a letter from me is probably the last thing you were expecting, but I figured maybe the best way to get my message across would be to take you back to something familiar. I need to tell you that I messed up, I messed up and I am so sorry.

Everything that happened that day replays in my mind like an old song with a catchy tune. Except this song is full of lyrics that I don’t want to hear, they remind me of how badly I messed up. I think of you every single day, and with each one that passes, I miss you a little bit more. All the memories flash through my mind at a million miles a minute.

I try to move on, I really do.

But then I remember the freckles on your back and the way that I used to make you laugh. Every morning I wake up I still reach for you. I remember the roses that were on your shirt when you told me this would never work. You know even when I say I’ve moved on, even though I know that you’re gone, all I think about is where I went wrong.

I still dream for you.

No matter where I go, I’m always gonna want you back. No matter how long you’re gone, I’m always gonna want you back. I know, you know I will never get over you. You are my light, my life my all. I had no right to demand you move on faster. I know you love me, I truly do.

So here I sit writing to tell you that I messed up badly, but I’m asking for a second chance. A second chance to be the support system you need, a second chance to love you. If you’re not ready to say you love me that is okay because you are worth every single second I will wait to hear those words come out of your mouth.

Love Always,

Luke

You stood there in stunned silence for a moment while your brain processed the words you just read. Could it really be true? After all that had happened could he really want you back?

It was the last words, the last words that got to you the most.

“You are worth every single second I will wait”

When you read the words, you could feel every wall your heart had built up shatter into a million pieces. The tears streaming down your face turned from those of sadness to those of joy.

Without even a second thought, you quickly ran to your phone and dialed the number you knew by heart.

Ring, ring

“Hey! I’ve been waiting for you to call.”

“Luke I-“

“Did you get my letter? I’m guessing you got my letter, or you wouldn’t have called me. Anyway, I’m so, so sorry and I-“

“Luke…”

You take a deep breath before uttering the next words, it’s time, you’re ready.

“I love you”

#5sos #luke hemmings #want you back #youngblood #fanfic

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