#VICTORCAYRO
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dannyhellman · 10 months ago
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The first 100 readers who sign up at the pre-campaign page for the #JACKEDTRACTS Zoop campaign AND buy the book at launch get a FREE signed, limited edition copy of Victor Cayro's tract, “Boo Boos for Beelzebub!”
Sign up now! https://zoop.gg/c/jackedtracts
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ruixzine · 10 years ago
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Week 3: Back to the Minors
(You know, eventually I’m going to run out of movie sequel titles, but I promise you before I do, I will squeeze every ounce of life out of this gag).
So how’s it going? Nevermind that, let’s get on with it and start talking about me.
So the driver’s side seatbelt in my truck is broken. Or, at least the buckle is. So now, I have to take my seatbelt and clamp it into the passenger side buckle and it looks SO INCREDIBLY FOOLISH. And now when I have a passenger (which fortunately doesn’t happen that often on account of people are sort of scared to ride in my truck just in general) I have to make a decision on who’s life is more valuable. I can count on one hand the people that would rank above me:
1. My Mom 2. Ok, so I can count on one finger the people that would rank above me. And I can’t just not wear the seatbelt because one time I did that and I traveled a block without one and got a ticket. Actually, less than a block. For those that are familiar with Dubuque, I pulled out of the Oky Doky parking lot on 1st Street and drove to my girlfriend at the time’s studio which was across 1st Street from Lot One… again, LESS THAN A BLOCK AWAY. I managed to get the ticket thrown out, but it still cost me $90 in court costs that I frankly didn’t want to pay… Not to mention, shouldn’t have had to solely because this cop was bored. Because that’s what they are here. They are bored.
Well, maybe not for the past two weeks, they haven’t been. Another killing happened like two days ago. Some dirt blew his girlfriend away. I didn’t know them, so therefore have nothing to say on the matter, so let’s talk about the killer that I do know for a minute. So remember in my last post when I talked about the guy that loved to shop at our store for records and also loved murder? Well here’s a new development with that story. I jokingly threw out the line, both here on the blog and out loud several times about how it would be a shame to see this guy’s record collection go to waste. Well, Saturday we got a letter from this dude telling us that we can basically have his records. Well, he tells us this, but not before writing some of the most upsetting words I’ve ever read in my life. 
So yeah… anyway, today I brought a copy of the letter down to the police station and they were too wrapped up in this other homicide to talk to us about it. I just thought it may help them somehow, but most importantly that, I thought it may help us. I want those records so bad I can taste it. FUCK! Fingers crossed.
Some new developments for Ruix and DAAC this week: In the fall, we plan on shooting a pilot for the local cable access channel. In it, we plan to include interview segments with local and regional artists and musicians, live performances and other cool shit to be determined later and hopefully turn it into a monthly series, much like the podcast is going to be. Definitely, more on that in the coming months. 
And speaking of the podcast, I believe I mentioned it last post, but I’ll reiterate that we are slated to have the first episode in the can and ready to be streamed by July 5. Again, the podcast will be hosted by myself and possibly someone else… I don’t know yet. Maybe just me and a guest every month. My first guest will be none other than (I’m just gonna say it) LEGENDARY local artist and all around lovable guy Victor Cayro. Victor and I are buds from way back. We were roommates in the mid-2000′s for a while and grew up drinking and doing drugs in many of the same circles here in Dubuque basically since high school. So I am excited about the prospect of getting in a room together and hammering out a lengthy discussion because it’s something we haven’t had the chance to do for a while.
One last thing I would like to mention and that’s that last Friday I attended the wedding of one of my dearest friends. I watched him marry a girl that I can safely say has changed his life for the better in every conceivable way. I’ve watched this happen over the last couple years and even developed a close friendship and affinity for his bride as well. This is a rare thing, so I’m truly happy that they’ve found each other. Also I’m happy to say that, as weddings go it was a really fun time. I didn’t feel put out or inconvenienced by it and, truthfully most weddings do make me feel that way. But this ceremony was short and sweet, presided over by another one of my dearest friends and attended by about the greatest group of friends and family I’ve ever had the privilege of being part of. AND I FUCKING DANCED! Yeah, I just remembered that. I danced like a motherfucker and I goddamn hate dancing. Well, I guess it was just that fun. Anyway, Drew and Jackie, collectively The Bissells… I salute you. Congratulations. I love you both very much and I’m so excited for you to spend life together.
All right, enough of this sappy bullshit. I’m going to get hammered. See you next week.
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dannyhellman · 1 year ago
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Get ready.
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dannyhellman · 9 months ago
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VICTOR CAYRO is one of 74 cartoonists in JACKED TRACTS, a spirited satire of those Christian comic tracts that scared us as kids. Get on over to our crowdfunding campaign at Zoop and grab yourself some devilish fun!
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dannyhellman · 9 months ago
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We're sending a free signed copy of Victor Cayro's "Boo Boos for Beelzebub” tract to the first 100 folks who sign up at our pre-campaign page & buy JACKED TRACTS at launch! 32 slots are still open, so grab this deal quick!
Sign up here: https://zoop.gg/c/jackedtracts
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dannyhellman · 1 year ago
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Don't miss the crowdfunding campaign for JACKED TRACTS, launching soon at Zoop! The first 100 readers to sign up at the pre-campaign page & buy the book at launch get a free signed copy of Victor Cayro's "Boo Boos for Beelzebub!" 
For more info: https://zoop.gg/c/jackedtracts?fbclid=IwZXh0bgNhZW0CMTAAAR1I1dFl8QmsFH94RU5Xb7Xgrod8baFzlCGkzAFHj-pmT7H7B1f2iJ5VOtw_aem_AQATtT1Mt9aYJaeMHiIhonnNWxgd0Ncp0CA_U7k340CPS35yvIq2IRSFs5_GhlGqrNZ8_pRX1_qDamWeFN_gkzf0
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