#YOU GUYS ARE SO NICE IM CHERISHING EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR COMMENTS YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE

[loopseedaysee]

forgot to slap these on the post but!!! some stills from the amv!!

[tteokggukk]

welcome to my youtube channel → kth

✳ pairing: idol!taehyung x youtuber!reader

✳ genre: fluff, taehyung scenario, stranger to lovers, reader is an artist who posts art videos on youtube

✳ warnings: none!

✳ words: 2.9k

✳ a/n: hello, this is my second bts oneshot/scenario. i just like to write for fun but if you’d like to let me know if there’s anything i can improve on please do so! i’d love to know how to improve. anyways, i hope you enjoy!

"Hey guys, welcome to my YouTube Channel."

You spoke in front of the camera. Sets of acrylic paint were spread out across the table next to a stand that held an 18x24 inch canvas. You were in the middle of making your seventeenth video, a highly requested one at that, and deep down you were ecstatic to start working on the painting.

Never in your life did you think you would ever start a YouTube account. You always considered yourself a very shy and private person, not one to go out of their way and broadcast themselves all over the internet. Your best friends, however, were two very well-known YouTubers and always found a way to include you in their videos and live streams. Somehow people liked seeing more of you, and so you were convinced by your best friends and the audience to start your own YouTube channel.

But you weren't very accustomed to bringing a camera everywhere with you to document and share whatever was happening in your daily life, you found it too awkward and you were still camera-shy, so you decided to create content in a way that would still keep you comfortable while doing something you loved.

An art channel.

Your channel blew up pretty fast. Requests started pouring in here and there. You became known for your very calm demeanor and artistic skills, so you took this as an opportunity to sell your works online as a way to earn some extra money for your future. Occasionally, you'd do lives to talk to your fans and you were happy at the support they showed you, which only encouraged you to keep making videos.

"This was a highly requested video, and I honestly can't wait to get started," you told the camera, mentally telling yourself to insert the comments and messages you got in your DMs to paint this Adonis-like human being. The requests started coming in after you had an Instagram live where you did some quick sketches while playing some of your favorite songs in the back, and people noticed one of the songs you played was by him.

"You guys also asked if I could sell this painting, but because of the "high demand"," you spoke, adding air quotes, "I'd like to keep it up for auction so the proceeds could go to different fundraisers."

You started mixing different colors in your palette and showed everyone the picture for your reference.

"So, without further ado, today I will be painting Kim Taehyung."

"Hey guys, welcome to my YouTube Channel."

Taehyung watched as you spoke in the video, looking behind you to see a bunch of art materials. The title of the video was left ambiguously, only being named most requested video, leaving him no clue on what it was you were going to create this time.

He's been watching your videos for quite some time now, ever since your channel started rising. Art was one of his major interests and he absolutely adored the way you made your videos with the calming, ASMR-like sound of mixing paint and how you skillfully glided the brush across the canvas. On days when he found himself tired and in need of a quick way to relax, he'd subconsciously find himself binge watching videos on your channel— even repeating several videos since you were only starting. He found it fascinating, but also because he found you interesting.

Because of your channel, he even created an anonymous YouTube account just to leave nice comments on your videos along with a private Instagram account to be able to watch your lives.

Needless to say, he didn't miss that one live where you played the song Winter Bear. It made his whole night, making him sleep with a smile on his face.

"This was a highly requested video, and I honestly can't wait to get started." 

He watched as a bunch of comments started appearing onscreen popping up one by one as they gradually got faster, eventually covering you. It took a moment before it sunk in that he was the highly requested person they wanted you to paint. He paused the video, wide-eyed, before shouting in excitement. Jimin had to come in and check what the whole commotion was about.

"Y/n's going to paint me!" Taehyung exclaimed, his mouth turning into his famous boxy smile. 

"Ah, the YouTuber you really like?" Jimin smiles before sitting down next to Taehyung who continued playing the video, "I wanna see."

"You guys also asked if I could sell this painting, but because of the "high demand", I'd like to keep it up for auction so the proceeds could go to different fundraisers."

"Wow, she seems really kind," Jimin says, while Taehyung only nods, his eyes glued to the screen.

"So, without further ado, today I will be painting Kim Taehyung."

He felt his heart beat fast when you mentioned his name, and without realizing it his ears have gone all red. 

On screen, you began sketching, "You guys have also been sending me a lot of questions lately, which is why I decided to tweet about doing a q&a."

"What questions did you ask?" Jimin asked Taehyung.

"I asked her if being an artist is something she'd like to pursue," Taehyung told him.

"Ooooh, trying to get to know her," Jimin teases, "Our little Taehyungie has a celebrity crush."

Taehyung rolls his eyes but breaks out into a grin anyway, "I just respect her artistry."

"Right, okay," Jimin snickers, obviously not buying it.

Taehyung knew he was telling the truth, though. It was impossible to have feelings for someone who you only knew through a screen. He found you attractive for sure, but he of all people would know that almost no one is completely one-hundred percent themselves on screen. Genuine as you may be, there are still things that are best kept to yourself. He couldn’t lie though, if given the chance to get to know you, he’d never pass up on that offer.

"Someone asked why I don't use that much ready-made paint," You spoke on screen, "It's ‘cause I learn a lot from mixing my own colors, and also I just really enjoy it."

The painting was beginning to come together halfway through the video and Taehyung's question finally made its way to you. "Kimyeontan95 asks, ‘is painting a career you want to pursue? I love your work, by the way’."

"That was basically I love you," Jimin holds back a laugh, earning him a light punch in the arm from Taehyung.

"Thank you so much, kimyeontan95, and no, painting is just a hobby of mine and a way to earn some future savings. I actually really want to be a novelist."

Taehyung smiled after hearing you answer his question. Later on, the video was over and his portrait was complete. He hurriedly redirected himself to the link that was provided for the auction.

Something in him wanted to have that painting no matter what, so he set himself as the highest bidder and eventually had it mailed to his home where he put your work up in his room to cherish.

A day after your video was posted, you woke up to a thousand notifications from your phone. Hundreds of people were mentioning you in tweets and you had numerous missed calls from your best friends and some texts telling you to check your online art shop. You groggily scroll through your feed, a bit confused as to what was happening.

I wanted to buy this painting and I had it in my list, but now it's unavailable!

Y'ALL WHAT RICH KID SET THE HIGHEST BID TO A MILLION DOLLARS IM CRYING

@yourtwittername are you planning to sell a new collection?

a million dollar bid wtf swownwowksodiowl

Someone just bought all of @yourtwitterusername's paintings. I'm crying in broke eye—

but like what if taehyung set that bid? @yourtwitterusername

What?

I just woke up and my mentions are pouring. What is going on? You tweeted.

Thousands of replies began coming in leaving you feeling overwhelmed and confused on where to start. Everyone was telling you to check your site, and so you did. You felt your heart almost stop beating when you saw that every single artwork you had up for sale were sold out. Nothing was left behind. You checked your emails, and the confirmations were there.

How could this have happened overnight?

ALL MY WORKS ARE SOLD OUT?!?!?!?? WHO COULDVE DONET THIS??? You tweeted, hands shaking.

You felt your heart race, a wide grin that could go even wider if possible was plastered on your face. You tried to stop yourself from screaming in excitement but couldn't so you ended up jumping up and down and doing happy dances before calming down to assess the situation. Finally, you sat down in front of your laptop to see where all your works were being shipped to.

Replies started coming in.

CONGRATS YOU FIGURED IT OUT

WILL U RESTOCK

AHSKWJOA CONGRATS BB

I'M SO HAPPY FOR U

BUT Y/N WHO BOUGHT THEM ALL

Checking your emails, you discover that your art works were all bought by one person. Anonymous. There was no name and someone requested to have their personal information redacted. 

Anonymous? Surely this wasn't a joke?

The person kept their name anonymous. You tweeted and muted the notifications just to allow yourself to focus on finding out who it was that bought everything.

At the bottom of all the removed personal information, there was one username that you were sure you've heard or seen somewhere.

@ Kimyeontan95. 

Underneath the username was a short but sincere message.

"Your videos have always helped me wind down after a long, busy day. I can't express how much you inspire me with your talent and how I wish someday you'd teach me to be half as good as you, as I'm not very gifted in the painting department. I admire how you put your gifts into good things, and I very much idolize you in one way or another. This is just a small way of showing my support for you, but also because all your works are amazing and I'd love to have a small room filled with my favorite art works. I look forward to reading works of yours soon, future novelist.”

Feeling the heat creeping up on your cheeks, you smiled to yourself. The letter was definitely heartfelt and you wanted so badly to thank the person who sent it.

Later that afternoon, you decided to go on live to personally thank the anonymous buyer for buying your works and for sending that wonderful note. You fixed yourself up a little bit and pressed live as thousands of your followers began to tune in.

"Hello, everyone," you greeted, smiling. Replies with greetings started coming in and you couldn't help but chuckle at the eager messages your followers were sending. They truly made you happy.

As expected, several questions began pouring in.

"Right, so, I wanted to do this live because of what happened. As you may have noticed, all my works were suddenly sold out which definitely took me by surprise," you started, "Unfortunately the buyer left everything anonymous. They only left what I assume is a username and a short letter, which I will keep to myself for personal reasons."

@follower1WHAT

@follower2 will you keep selling your works?

@follower3 THATS SUCH A SWEET GESTURE THO OMG/

@follower4 am I the only one who thinks a secret admirer bought it

@follower5 check my YouTube channel I made a theory on who bought her works

@follower6 i rlly think it's taehyung

@follower7 I’'m so proud of you :(((

"If the person who bought all of my paintings is watching this, I really want to thank you from the bottom of my heart. I appreciate the letter as well, you've honestly made me the happiest person on Earth," you smiled.

@follower8 AWWWWW

@follower9 ANON COME OUT

@follower10 i really wanna know what the letter says

@ Kimyeontan95 I'm glad :)

Your heart stopped at one of the replies. You took your phone immediately from its fixed position with wide eyes and began scrolling up fast because of the immediate replies coming in. Wasn't that the username?

@follower11 what's going on?

@follower12 y/n are you okay?

You could no longer find the reply so you set your phone down, fixing it back in place.

"For a second I thought the person who bought it was watching my live," you sighed and smiled nervously, "So anyways— I'd really love to express my gratitude so if they're watching, please contact me. I can't say thank you en—"

Suddenly the replies were frantic. People were sending keyboard smashes here and there. Only a few of them were actual coherent comments. "What is going on?" You asked as you began scrolling through.

@follower13 Y/N CHECK VLIVE

@follower14 TaEHYUNF IS ON LIVE

@follower15 I kNEW IT THOUGH???

@follower16 Y/N CHECK TAEHYUNGS LIVE

@follower5 Y'ALL I WAS RIGHT I SAID CHECK MY YT

Keeping your live on, you grabbed your laptop as fast as you could to check out the links being sent to your live. When it finally loaded, you could've sworn you'd have a heart attack. 

"Oh, I think she's watching me," Taehyung grinned through his live, holding his phone in front of the camera. He quickly shows the viewers his phone screen, which showed your live of you watching him through your laptop. Your eyes widened and you looked back at your phone camera that was broadcasting your live, then back at his live.

Taehyung started giggling, "I guess we're just watching each other, huh?" He smiled. Behind him were packed and unpacked parcels of paintings you recognized were yours. If it was even possible, your eyes grew even wider at this, "Oh my god," you breathed out.

"I should probably introduce myself," Taehyung spoke, "Hello everyone, I'm Kim Taehyung. How are you all doing? Today I’m planning on redecorating my room after our practice. What are the packages behind me? Oh, these are paintings I recently bought."

"Are those my paintings?" You asked out loud, though you knew the answer. 

"Are those my paintings?" Your voice echoed from Taehyung's broadcast as your live was streaming from his phone. He grinned sheepishly, "Yes, these are your works, I hope you don't mind."

"Not at all," You smiled, "You were the buyer?" 

You mentally slapped yourself for asking such obvious questions, but you just couldn't believe everything that was happening now.

"Yes," he chuckles, "I really love your paintings." Suddenly the sound of Jimin’s voice echoed from behind and Taehyung quickly stood up to lock the door, knowing he’d get the teasing of a lifetime if Jimin came and saw him talking to you.

"Thank you so much, I—" Your voice began to crack and your eyes welled with tears that you tried to fight back, "I really appreciate it. And the letter, that was really sweet."

"No, thank you. Wait, don't cry—" Taehyung spoke nervously.

"I'm just so happy," You laughed while wiping the tears off.

The replies from both ends were coming in like crazy. On one hand, majority of everyone watching found the whole scenario cute and started pairing you two out of nowhere, though there were a few haters on the other. It didn't really bother you, you were just so happy someone you idolized noticed your work.

"I'm glad," he was watching you with a fond smile through his phone, then the sound of the Jin’s voice began coming from outside Taehyung’s room, "Sorry for this sudden grand reveal. I really can't stay on live for too long but I'd love to keep talking to you." He spoke.

"Oh no, that's okay," You spoke fast.

"Do you mind if I send you a message? Assuming you already know the username," he asks.

"No not at all, I'd love to keep talking as well," your heart was beating erratically now. You didn't have to see your face to know how red it was becoming.

"Alright, great. Um, before I end this vlive I just wanna say you're a great artist and to all my viewers watching this, please support y/n's artworks and her channel! If I see any negative comments, I'll be taking responsibility and I'll unfortunately have my agency involved in taking those out," he spoke in a commercial tone kind of voice, "And to y/n, I'll be keeping in touch.” The door from behind him suddenly bursts open and Jin, Jimin, and Jungkook rush inside.

“You were talking to her!” Jimin shouts excitedly.

“Finally!” Jungkook claps.

“Is that why you kept the door locked?” Jin teases.

“Bye, everyone!" Taehyung quickly waves goodbye to the camera and smiles before turning the broadcast off. 

You sat there stunned, almost forgetting you were also on live. You turned to your phone which was still recording you, "That was unexpected."

Suddenly, a notification in your DMs popped up. "I'll go ahead and process everything that just happened now, bye guys! See you in my next video." You ended the live with a wave and smile.

You quickly went into your direct messages and found the same username, Kimyeontan95. You opened it and found a picture of Taehyung holding one of your paintings with a peace sign on his other hand, the other members behind him posing with your other works, making you laugh.

Your heart fluttered at the message below the picture.

I hope this isn't too sudden, but would you like to go out with me sometime?

a/n: hello! if you finished it, thank you so much for reading! i hope you liked it hehe. i think i’m gonna keep posting the stuff i write bc i have so many ideas for the other members as well. also this is fun hehe. if you wanna read my other work, let’s fall in love for the night, ← here’s a link! thanks again for reading and please look forward to my future writing/edits.

[deeeelightfuldee]

Are you better at cooking dinners or making cakes/biscuits/sweets? baking definitely. I want to get more comfortable cooking.

Have you ever cut someone else’s hair? yes. I used to be pretty good at doing my brothers hair-- even the fading. But I’m sure I’ve forgotten it all by now.

Who was the last guest in your house and what were they staying for? probably my sister or my nephews.

How many long term relationships have you been in? blegh. not many. Whenever I’d know that it didnt have long term potential, id drop it. no sense dragging out the inevitable.

Do you sleep with all the lights out, or do you leave a lamp or even the television on? so for the longest time I kept my room super dark. I slept well. once miller died and kile broke my heart, I couldn’t sleep without the tv playing. I needed to hear something calming and voices talking so I wouldn’t be left with my thoughts. I still can’t turn it off.

Who is one person you have forgiven, but still have not “forgotten” what they have done? i think its easy to say “forgive and forget” but the reality is that once we have endured trauma we don’t easily forget. I think its kind of unrealistic. I’m trying to forgive kile but thats going to take.. i dont know how long. As for what it was... it was just betrayal.. lying. for six+ years. lots of laughing at me. 

Are you a fan of Lana Del Rey? I like some of her songs.

Do you know your blood type? o+

Do you know your mother’s birthday? Yes. its coming up. 

Have you ever been pregnant? I dont think so. I was really late after my assault but who knows.

How old were you when you first went on a plane? like 7ish

Have you ever had to take out a loan for anything? Yeah, student loans. 15k feels so daunting right now.

Are both of your blood parents still in your life? One is. My mom.

When was the last time you went apple picking? highschool maybe?

Someone asked you what you wanted, what would you say? money.. or a trip.

Have you ever been drunk at school or work? definitely not. 

How many bedrooms are in your house? four. 

Are you smart about computers? I know some stuff.

Have you ever played Just Dance for Wii? oh heck’n yeah

Do you own a Xbox 360? I had one from my brother for a little while but I traded it for the gamecube since Kile was going to send me one of the 15 he had lol. That didn’t end up happening, but its OK i really dont need more gaming.

Would you ever do a sex tape for a million dollars? oooooooo.. probably not.

So, do you need a nap? all day is full of naps to try and get over this.

What would you rather be doing? school

What sport are you the best at? maybe volleyball or swimming

Do you have a little sister? What’s her name? Nope, im the baby. 

Do you complain a lot? no, i try not to. I find complaining to be the most unattractive and yet common human trait and while there are definitely situations worthy of complaining, most of the time it just makes a situation worse than it actually was.

Would you rather go to an authentic haunted house or an ancient temple? temple

Do you like fruity or minty gum? definitely minty

Are you looking forward to any day of this month? i was really looking forward to Kile’s birthday on monday, but since we arent talking anymore then there is no joy in that. all the other special dates have been ruined by covid.

Have you ever gotten detention? Nope. homeschoolers and detention arent a thing. 

Is there a traumatic event that you’ve experienced that’s changed your life? oh sure. heartbreak, deaths, assaults, etc.

Do you buy a majority of your clothes from a certain store, or do you just pick out items of clothing you could see yourself wearing, not caring about the store it came from? no, i can’t be super picky because not every store carries clothing long enough for me.

Have any of the artists you’re fond of released new albums recently? i havent got a clue

Would you ever keep your favorite animal as a pet? I mean I’m very fond of cats & dogs

Ever cried so much you threw up? this is what happened the whole 2-3 weeks following finding out about Kile.

Who is your best guy friend? I suppose now that would be Nathan

What do you two do when you hang out? drives, game nights, get food/drinks, or just talk.

What is a movie that you thought you would hate but you ended up loving? Her

Do you even like horror movies? not particularly. I’ll watch them if someone else wants to but its not my preference.

Do you live in the country? i live in the suburbs i suppose.

What is your favorite accent? Some southern and British accents. <same ... i have no idea how I made the font like this.

Have you ever had a boyfriend your parents didn’t like? Not that I can think of.

Do you drink Pepsi or Coke? diet coke

What do you plan to do on your 21st birthday? my family celebrated during the day and then I think nathan took me out on the town

Do you have any person in your family with an addiction to beer? nope.

Do you take a lot of pictures? man. this question is hard. I used to love taking pictures of myself. I had much more self confidence and some of it was because kile LOVED my selfies -- or so he said. and I just had so much fun doing that. Since the heartbreak, I’ve maybe taken 10 selfies. I just don’t have any self confidence in my looks anymore. its so different now. most of my pictures now are of other people or scenery.

What kind of face wash do you use? cerave when I want to. otherwise i use water and a very particular type of fabric. 

Does drama always seem to follow you? No, i dont think so.

Does anybody in your family race? like cars? running? no.

Are you closer to your mom or dad? My mom.

How much money did you used to get from the ”tooth fairy?” I think i got it like 2x and it was a dollar.

Do you have a laptop or desktop? Laptop.

Do you like your parents? i love my mom.

Do you secretly like someone? No.

Would you ever date your best male friend? I don’t see any romantic feelings developing between nathan and I

What are you currently listening to? I have gilmore girls on.

Do you want to be single? oooof. Um. I am torn on this subject. On the one hand, i really am ready to be loved, held, protected, cared for, etc. I love the idea of building a life together with someone and us both protecting our unit. I miss supporting, cherishing, loving on someone. Yet on the other hand, im fine being single. I have so much insecurity about myself lately that I dk that anyone else needs to deal with that baggage. Idk

Did you go out or stay in last night? I stayed in. ill be staying in for some time.

Have you pretended to like someone? romantically, no. professionally, yes.

How is your heart lately? Sad. heavy. 

Are you wearing socks? not at the moment. 

What do people call you? Di, diana, dee, ana, di-nan-na, dine-uh, deenah.

Do you get stressed out easily? no, I really dont

Have you ever been taken to the emergency room in an ambulance? yes

What is wrong with you right now? im sick. im heartbroken.

Do you own something from Hot Topic? not that I know of. if I do, it’d be from like middle school. I never shopped there but people tended to give gifts from there.

Would you rather sleep with someone else or alone? Alone. maybe I havent found the right sort of person to share a bed with.

Do you still talk to the person you last made out with? No.

Have you ever seen your best friend cry? Yes, several times. 

Did you get any compliments today? No.

Have you ever gone to a beach? many many many times.

What would you say if someone asked you to get high right now? not my thing. at all.

Do you believe that everything happens for a reason? Yes.

Have you ever done volunteer work just because you wanted to? Yes.

Do you have long nails? they are healthy length. I want to grow them out a bit more. 

Do you like the gender you are? Yeah.

Do you generally look nice in photos? Not anymore

Have you ever had a stick insect as a pet? no haha

What colour are your father’s eyes? Blue.

If I handed you a concert ticket right now, who would you want to be the performer? uhhhhm, blue october

Would you ever get into a long distance relationship? maybe not anymore. 

What’s your favorite hot beverage? hot chocolate from dunkin

Did you ever play an instrument? If so what? i did. no comment.

Would you rather carve pumpkins or wrap presents? oooooohhhhhhhhh man i love both.

Do you think you’re important? I mean i offer some importance to this world but eh.

What’s the best compliment you’ve ever received? Hmm no idea.

Have you been diagnosed with any mental disorders? no

Have you ever moved to another state or country? If so, how did it feel to be new? No.

Do you know how to properly eat food with chopsticks? Nope.

What was the first thing you ate today? I haven’t eaten since breakfast yesterday

If you could spend the day, doing absolutely anything, with anyone, anywhere, what would it be like? for the longest time it was to spend the day driving aimlessly and getting food and talking about everything and nothing with Kile. now, its just.. idunno. blank.

If I were to ask you how you are doing, and you were only able to answer completely honestly, what would come out? I’m not doing well.

What is the one thing that you have been avoiding that you should do? There’s a few things related to school.

Is there anything that you wish you could take back? not really, no.

What, in your mind, could make you truly happy? this whole covid nonsense going away, heartbreak to soothe, and my miller back.

If you could change one conversation in your life, what would you say differently? Would it have REALLY made any difference? i dont know. 

When is the next time you’ll change your hairstyle? Will you color it? I just changed it up so itll be a bit.

Do people normally say you’re a fast typist, or are you rather slow? Fast.

Have you ever been considered the ‘smartest person in school?’ yes. several times.

How many drugs are in your system? lol lots of meds rn to kick this. usually none.

What’s on your schedule for tomorrow? the same as today.

Do you currently have any bite marks/hickeys on your body? No. i dont like the idea of bite marks but hickeys were fun for a time. in not visible areas tho.

Do you call anyone baby? Not anymore.

What’s your current mood? Bleh.

What were you doing before filling out this survey? Watching gilmore girls

How late did you stay up last night? I took PM meds at i wanna say 8? maybe 7? I don’t remember.

When was the last time you cried really hard? its been a few weeks since ive cried about Kile. I’m in the numb stage.

Is your hair longer than your shoulders? hahahahahahah

[abdicatedarchive]

Cherish’s House Party || Chase and Savvy

𝐖𝐇𝐄𝐍: cherish’s house party // 15th of january.

𝐅𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆: chase x savvy ( @savvy-cassidy ).

𝐓𝐑𝐈𝐆𝐆𝐄𝐑𝐒: underage drinking.

𝐃𝐄𝐓𝐀𝐈𝐋𝐒: two cheerleaders playing ping pong and having a good time gossiping

Chase had come over to find beer pong in the kitchen and no one to play with until he saw Savvy. "Savvy, I challenge you to a game of pong" he said as he pulled her over to the table lightly. "That is if you can take the heat" Chase teased as he racked up the cups. Gabrielle was off doing something, and he always enjoyed talking to Savannah. Maybe he would even hear some good gossip out of it. 

Savvy was, as usual, sipping on her drink and mingling around the party. That is, until she was ushered over to the beer pong table. "when have i ever not been able to take the heat?" she scoffed and finished off the drink in her head. "good thing i get better at this game the more i drink," the brunette was already a bit tipsy. 

"I mean that's just the science behind it" said Chase laughing a little, "once you have double vision then you get two cups at once" he joked. Once the cups were racked he grabbed two balls and washed them off in the sink. "Ladies first" he said as he handed her the ping pong balls and went to his side of the table. "So tell me, have you seen anything interesting at the party so far?" Chase asked.

"i think i just try harder when my vision is blurry so i really work twice as hard on trying to have good aim," she commented with a laugh. "how polite of you. not too many of the males around here have manners," she joked. taking the ball she took her shot, seeing it bounce off of one of the rims. "off to a great start. hm. ive been in two bedrooms and neither were occupied at the time i stumbled upon them, i thought that was pretty interesting because that never happens. also, staci poured a full beer down sara's shirt when she told her to be careful not to spill it."

"Well, I was in the cheer chat during the men suck discussion, so I'm on my best behavior" he said sarcastically, he didn't mind. Especially when it came to all the girl's boyfriends being kind of shit. There had been a lot of newly single moments recently on the team in general. He was happy with his girlfriend so hating on men was definitely an option, it kept him in line with his own relationship. Chase caught the ball when it bounced off the rim and held it while he waited for her to throw again. "Well Sara had it coming with that comment, and you never tell someone with a full cup to do anything" he joked, "Staci's got low impulse control that's for sure". "to be fair, i think we all have our moments of sucking so dont worry it isn't just men," although they did seem to have far more moments, but that was beside the point and she didn't feel the need to bring it up. on her next attempt, she sank the ball, "yesss hopefully now im getting somewhere. and you're right on both of those counts. what about you what interesting things have you seen thus far?"  Chase took the ball out of the cup and chugged the whole thing. "Well" he said catching his breath, "I saw one guy constantly changing rooms, so I investigated a little" he said throwing his first ball and it sinking into the cup. "And it turns out he is talking to two girls at this party, and I am 30% sure they are texting each other about this cute mystery guy that they're talking to" Chase said as he tried the other ball and missed. "So I cannot wait to see how that turns out"  Savvy lifted her brows as he took a breath, knowing that whatever he was about to say was probably quite the story. Lifting up the cup, she took out the ball and chugged the liquid, something a good friend of hers had taught her to do well over the years. "dont they know that the circles around here are small? its like we've all slept with each other by association."

"Everybody is sleeping with everybody" said Chase letting a small laugh fall from his lips as he waited for her to throw again. "Speaking of, who is your newest conquest? I have to live vicariously through others now that I'm back with Gabrielle" he said, intrigued to know what the girl was up to. She was one of the most beautiful girls in school, it only made sense that she had guys at her beck and call.  "That is putting it lightly," she chuckled, setting down the now empty cup and setting up her next shot. it circled the rim of the cup a couple of times before finally sinking inside. "conquest? you mean like, have i hooked up with anyone tonight? chase. im a lady. you think i do that kind of thing at a party where there are loads of people who could walk in at any moment?" the girl was rambling playfully before eventually answering, "jet." mostly because everyone likely already knew anyway, it happened at most parties. it was like knowing that someone was going to end up throwing up in the bushes, jet and savvy were going to hook up. "how is that going?"  "A lady never tells" said Chase, knowing full well that there was always Jet. He was hoping there was maybe some variety in there, but Jet was ... well he was kinda it. He was that guy in town for sure. "Oh that's still going?" he said with a smile, "He is super hot, and I heard he's very good in bed. Good for you" Chase replied. Chase chugged the cup and put it to the side before continuing. "It's going great, it's a race right now to see who is the drunker one and who is in charge of getting us home. I'm hoping she's the responsible one tonight, but who is to say at this rate. She could be off taking shots with Juliette right now, and they're both so tiny they'll be on the floor in minutes" the boy said with a laugh.  "We have a nice arrangement. It's very convenient. Plus, I wont have to worry I won't get off, which is definitely a big plus. Like an old, yet reliable habit." Savvy had to laugh at her own description, the alcohol definitely making her sound a little ridiculous. "Maybe someone else will get a turn, i just dont really want it to be when i have beer goggles, because ew." Crinkling her nose at the thought she shook her head. "so who do you think is winning? how drunk are you?"  "I get that, what you know is better than something new. And if it works for you, then why bother with anything else" said Chase, completely understanding. That was something about being with Gabrielle that he loved, it was always good because they had been at it for so long. "She only drinks liquor so probably her, but it has been me before and I am working my hardest at it" said Chase laughing a little, he didn't mind taking care of her at the end of the night. It was fun when she took care of him though. "Knowing her, it's who she is with. She can either drink a lot because she's having a really good time or a really bad time. But if it's in between she won't be drunk at all ... just a little buzzed"  “Something new can be exciting, if it’s the right something new,” Sav pointed out with a shrug. “It is always nice to have a safe option though too.” Because who didn’t like options. “Yikes she could be going pretty hard right now. So that will not be a fun morning for her. “  "It can be, but I am a sucker for the classics. Only one girl out there for me" said Chase with a small smile. He was soft for Gabrielle like that, sure he would be having a great deal more fun as a single guy at this school, but there was nothing that beat to comfort of being loved. "She'll be fine. No matter what I'll make her breakfast, even if I'm about to yak" said the boy. 

“Oh isn’t that just adorable,” to be fair, there was a time when Savvy may have thought the same thing, when she was dating someone she liked to think it would be for the long haul but that was rarely the case. “Breakfast too? Damn you really are one of the good ones.”  "Yeah the perks of her family taking me in, we get to spend every morning together no matter what rooms we sleep in" said Chase with a proud smile. He also treated her very well, just going above and beyond whenever he could. It made him feel like he was repaying a debt to her family. "What do your mornings with Jet look like? Or is it purely a party affair?" he asked, curious to know more.  “That is a pretty unique situation so I guess you should enjoy it as long as possible because you lucked out there. Do they let you stay in the same room though?” Sav was glad that her friend was happy though it seemed to be going well and that’s what was most important. Her brows raised at his question “we usually have each other for breakfast,” she answered as if it was nonchalant. “And then go out for pancakes because were fucking starving.”  "Yeah, I am milking it as much as physically possible" said Chase in all earnesty. He was certain they would not separate for college, but if they didn't get into the right schools then they would be screwed. Having a child together, even though it was a secret bonded them past the usual high school relationship, but it was hard to explain that to anyone because he couldn't. "That's a hearty breakfast, lots of vitamin d in that one" Chase joked, proud of himself for that one. "Pancakes is always a good dessert after a hearty breakfast"  “I can’t say that I blame you, I think most people would do the same thing. But hey im glad that it works out for you and you’re both happy with it, that’s honestly all that matters,” the girl nodded with a shrug. She couldn’t help but chuckle, “vitamin d, good joke. Best of the night so far. But agreed pancakes are the best. A nice way to refuel.”  "You can tell who at this school has a major vitamin d deficiency" said Chase with a small chuckle as well. There were a lot of people who just needed some kind of release, any kind. Whether it was a boxing class or getting laid, people needed to do something. 

Savvy couldn’t help but chuckle and nod in agreement, “you are correct about that, I wish them all the best, honestly. Might help some of their piss poor attitudes.” "I think that might be our big ticket to victory this cheer season" said Chase feeling the alcohol start to hit him. He hated to admit it, but a lot like his girlfriend he was a light weight. 

"everyone getting laid? you might be on to something with that," she chuckled and nodded in agreement, "you down for the count on this game, or what? i can already see your eyes getting glassy, you're sucha lightweight," she teased him.  "I did some shots earlier, but I think it's all kicking in now" said Chase, the room was a little spinny. "All I am is bone and muscle, there's nothing to absorb the alcohol" he said to defend himself, but it was the honest reason he couldn't handle too much to drink.

[chubsjiminiie]

Bʀᴇᴀᴋ Mʏ Hᴇᴀʀᴛ 🌙

~тaeнyυng х reader

~ pt 33/35

~ i missed you

~ prev ||  next

4.5k words.. its a long one!

a/n: i didn’t think i would write tonight bc im kinda ughhh. depression sucks but guys i really love how this turned out. I hope its not confusing and you get it.

posts everyday at 9pm est

requests are open!

Your body felt tense and you couldn’t seem to relax. Seokjin always throws an end of the year party and its always the biggest party of the year. Which means double the sweaty college kids getting wasted, double the alcohol, and double the hype. Everyone had been talking about tonight for the last week since he announced when it’d be happening. If we’re being honest ever since your birthday you hadn’t partied on the weekends like you usually did. You assumed Taehyung still did but he had confirmed earlier today he was too focused on school.

Part of you was extremely proud of him for finally focusing on himself and taking care of the things he needed to. But the other part of you was still upset at him even if he was doing better. It was nice to know your best friend wasn’t going to fail his classes and he was able to pass. But it sucked to not know how the person who you had so many feelings for, had been for nearly a month. Secretly you hoped he was hurting, and that he was crying just like you had been the nights you missed him most. It may seem a bit dramatic to cry for him because you weren’t actually dating-- but he had your heart in his hands and he just smashed it to the ground without a care.

He was and still is a good guy. He always knew the right words to say to make you feel better and to let you know he cared. It was just- he was horrible in relationships, even before you guys were together. You knew he broke so many hearts, and he refused to really acknowledge that part of his little games; but you couldn’t help falling for him. He was beautiful, not just physically but mentally. His heart was so pure and it intrigued you that he wasn’t good with love. You always wondered why it was hard for him to fully fall in love and give all of himself to just one person. He seemed scared... but when he was with you those fears didn’t show up unlike the other times with different girls. Perhaps you were reading way too into it and it was just you assuming shit.

You shake your head trying to focus on the task at hand. A pile of necklaces tangled together lay on top of your kitchen island, you had no idea how they even got tangled in your jewelry box but you were trying to wear one of the necklaces involved in the mess. With every necklace you untangled you noticed one really thin, delicate necklace, it had been a gift Taehyung gave you the same year you met. The memory was so sweet and innocent, it was the day you realized you had feelings.

He had invited you out to the mall because to him you needed a break from the all stress school had brought you. At the mall you were walking around sharing a pretzel you had bought at the food court. There was stand in the middle of the mall pathways that was shining brighter than the others; it had bracelets, earrings, and beautiful necklaces. Ignoring whatever Tae had just said to you,  you walked right up to one of the glass cases and scanned it to see if anything caught your eye. In an instant this delicate white gold necklace with a tiny heart as a pendant caught your eye. The guy behind the counter asks you which one you like and you point to it, he takes it out and shows you the price tag. It wasn’t that expensive but it was more than what you had to spend for the month. Bills were to be paid that week and rent so you couldn’t spend more than $50.

You hadn’t noticed Taehyung standing next to you until he moved your hand so he could see the price tag too. He didn’t have much of a reaction and encouraged you to buy it without knowing your situation. You pout and tell him that you can’t afford it right now. Without even thinking about it he lets the guy know you’re getting it and asks to look at the mens necklaces. The guy pulled out a tray that held about ten necklaces, most weren’t worth looking at. Then one really caught both of your eyes, it was a lightweight, also white gold chain, without a pendant. He quickly pointed it out and asked if there were any pendants that he could choose from. The guy brought out the pendants and they were all so beautiful, and sparkly.

“‘I’ll get this one.” He says picking up a the first letter of your name.

“Yah, don’t!” You giggle thinking its joke.

He just smiles and lets the guy know that it’s all together. You hadn’t really put it together that he was buying you the necklace until you saw him pull his wallet out and you quickly stopped him.

He looked at you and smiled, “You give me so much let me return the favor.”

It was small gesture but his eyes lit up when you put it on right away and your heart warmed up. His smile made you melt inside and just want to turn into a puddle on the floor. From then on you kept the necklace and wore it every single day until one day Yoongi teased you about it saying you were probably falling in love with your best friend. From that day you’d only wear it time to time; Tae wore his necklace proudly even when the guys teased him he would said “So what?” He rarely took it off the first year of having it but then slowly he too stopped wearing his until you guys began “dating”.

You held out the necklace and looked at all its beauty. Wow you thought. It had been months since you last wore it. You put it back down gently and pick up the one you originally had in mind to wear. For some reason it didn’t seem to fit the outfit you wearing anymore and the white gold seemed to fit better. He won’t notice it anyways you think and put it on. Even with the hurt in your heart the necklace made you happy and filled you with love; you missed him. You didn’t want to. The guys were so good at keeping you from missing him because they were always around to distract you but it wasn’t enough sometimes. They were great and are your best friends too, but Taehyung held such a big part of your heart and it just didn’t feel the same to be with them than being with him.

Suddenly a knock comes from your front door and a ding from your phone. Without looking at the text you know it’s Jimin already here to pick you up for Seokjin’s party, and probably leaving a overnight bag so he can sleepover. The door swings open before you get the chance to make it all the way there and his bright smile appears.

“You should lock your door more often what if I was a thief, Y/n-ie,” He walks up to you and kisses your cheek.

“If you were you’d be on the floor crying already. I’m always prepared,” You say pulling out a can of pepper spray from a corner in the hallway.

“Always one step ahead baby girl.” He winks and walks past you to your living room.

As you assumed he had an overnight bag with him and placed it right on your couch along with a toy story towel.

“Jiminie,” you chuckle, “A Toy Story towel, really?”

“Toy Story is the best. If you don’t like it, I don’t like you.”

“Oh I love it! I have the VCR and DVD version so get on my level, bitch.”

“No thanks. I rather stay my height then get bullied worst for being your height, shorty.”

“Hey.. we’re shorties together baby!”

You cute little banter continues on for a while as he gets comfortable at your house. It was still a little early to head to Seokjin’s so you both go into your room and watch Toy Story as night falls. You were both commenting at your favorite scenes in the movie and laughing at the jokes that sounded a little dirtier than you remembered as a child. As the movie comes to an end, you grab your phone to check the time, 10:47 p.m. .

“Oh that’s cute you’re wearing it again,” Jimin says looking at your neck.

“The necklace?”

“Mhm”

“I just saw it in my jewelry box and I just couldn’t leave it behind,” you say holding the little heart on your fingers, “It was calling my name.”

Jimin and you chuckle at your choice of words.

“Taehyung always liked seeing you in it. He wouldn’t stop bragging about how much you loved it and how you must cherish it since you always wore it.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. He’s a big softie, you know that. He started wearing the one he got at the same time when you started… your… thing. And we teased him about it but he said he didn’t care because it was his favorite. He hasn’t taken it off.”

You look at Jimin and he smiles slightly, a little sympathetic smile. You return his small smile, only yours is more sad and you feel an overwhelming feeling of sadness come over you. Tears puddle at the edge of your eyes and cloud your vision. You blink and the tears fall freely on your cheek; Jimin wipes them away and kisses your forehead.

“I’m sorry, I made you cry. I didn’t mean to.”

“No no it’s okay Chims. I just miss him, honestly. I was sad that he hurt me before but now I just wish that nothing had happened so I could talk to him like we used to. Ugh I know it’s dumb because he played me”

His hands cup your face and he lifts it to face his eyes. His smile is sweeter this time.

“No it’s not. It’s not dumb. You love him, not just in the romantic way but as your best friend. He was the one you always went to when you needed a push or you needed some extra lovin’. He was the one who made you smile the brightest. Even though I know you love all of us extremely, it’s very obvious he has a special place in your heart that can never be replaced. So it’s okay to miss him like hell, and cry tears for him. It’s also okay to be mad at him at the same time because as a,  potential something more, he fucked up.”

Your tears seemed to stop as Jimin finished his little speech, “I want to see him.”

“I think he’s coming tonight. If you feel ready, talk to him and see what happens.”

“But what if in the moment, I’m so caught up I forgive him for everything and let it go.”

“You won’t.”

“How do you know?”

“Because you’re not dumb,” he chuckles, “Y/n, you’ll probably both cry and then you’ll want to smack him after you’re done being sad.”

“I guess you’re right,” you say looking down at your hands, “He’ll probably let me smack him too.”

“Yes he would,” he gets out of your bed, “I love our heart to hearts but we got a party to get to. Everyone is probably already there but you know I love being fashionably late.”

“Okay let’s go!”

Seokjin’s place wasn’t far from yours, in fact none of you guys lived far from each other. You each somehow managed to lived within five to ten minutes from each other. The car ride was short and just a couple jokes were exchanged mainly coming from you, teasing Jimin’s sloppy moments when he’s drunk. He parks and you both walk up to the house. Already there are people on the porch and on the front yard making out. Walking through the front door a strong smell of vodka and tequila hit your nose, and you face Jimin. He just smiles and leads you to where he has already spotted your friends.

“Y/n-ie we’ve missed you!” Hobi engulfs you into a hug and kisses the top of your head.

You both pull away and you look around at your group. Taehyung was nowhere to be seen among them and you were a bit disappointed. After taking another glance you realize Jungkook isn’t there either so they must just be late as you and Jimin were. Your thoughts were confirmed when you felt arms wrap around your torso from behind and a chin lightly rested on your shoulder.

“You came!” Jungkook says pulling away.

You just nodded and let him greet his hyungs, that’s when you turned to your right and saw Taehyung standing there already looking at you with a shy smile. You return the smile and look down at the floor… he looked so… good. Jimin noticed your energy shift and nudged you, you lift your head up and see him smiling. His hand snakes down to grab yours and yoru finger intertwine.

“Let’s go dance!”

You eyes widened because the last time you “danced” with someone it was to make Taehyung jealous. You laugh and shake your head no.

“No no. I’m good I promise.” You whisper into his ear.

All the guys stood around in the circle by the dining room, talking about their plans for the summer. They were already planning for a vacation between the eight of you, to go to the beach or on a road trip. The whole time, you and Taehyung stole glances at each other, and every single time you’d catch each other. You guys ended up just having a mini staring contest but he ended up losing after you genuinely smiled at him and he returned it with a cute huge smile and he squinted his eyes closed.

“Ha! I won!” you say sticking your tongue out.

The guys all turned to look at the both of you, a bit surprised that you had actually said anything at all. Taehyung himself was a bit shocked you even looked at his direction so even those two words you spoke warmed his heart and his smile didn’t fade. Neither of you communicated after that, and the conversation between everyone ended up dying down. One by one they each went their separate ways, except Jimin, you, and of course Tae. You knew Jimin was only there because he knew you were still on edge about talking again to Taehyung and he didn’t want to abandon you to suffer alone.

“Go have fun. I’ll be fine. I think I’m ready.”

“Are you sure? I don’t want to leave you without any support.” he says looking at Tae’s direction.

“Yes, now go! Go get high and drunk and all that destructive stuff you do all the time.”

He laughs at your words and leaves. If it weren’t for the music, you’d be standing there in complete silence; if it weren’t for the drunken students walking by, you’d both be alone; if it weren’t for the sweaty atmosphere, the awkward tension would be more obvious to the public. You just nod your head up and down trying to figure out how to have decent conversation.

“Do you want to go outside and we can just chill out without all this mess?” He says walking up to you.

“Okay.”

You signalled him to lead the way to wherever he wanted to go, and he went straight to the back deck. It was surprisingly empty and quiet, with only the bass being able to be heard through the walls. Seokjin had a small outdoor table and a couple chairs around it so you both decided to sit there. The moon was full tonight, the stars seemed a little brighter too; the atmosphere wasn’t as awkward as you imagined it would be if you took out all the party energy. It was quiet but not uncomfortable.

You felt calm though, maybe because you missed him, the anger wasn’t present tonight. You wanted to speak up and say something, something funny that would make you both laugh and smile. But nothing seemed to come to mind, you were more just wondering a lot and trying to stop yourself from asking any questions. He seemed to notice your sort of of behavior and looked up at the stars. He didn’t want to be the first one to speak in case it bothered you for any reason so he waited for you to say something. You finally look at him and really take a good look at him. He was wearing a very colorful patterned collared shirt, he had left three buttons unbuttoned so his chest and collarbones were out. Looking at his chest you see the letter of your first name shining brightly despite there being no other light besides the moonlight. The necklace lay so delicately around his neck, and accented it so beautifully. Your eyes scan down to view the rest of his outfit and of course he’s wearing trousers and dress shoes. At this point Taehyung was finally looking at you and as your eyes met his you saw tears in his eyes.

“You know I never wanted to hurt you the way that I did.” he says softly.

“Then why did you?” you reply just as soft.

“Because I’m an idiot. I knew your feelings, and I knew mine too, but they scared me. I was scared of getting into this,” he signals between the two of you, “and messing it up. But I did it anyways without it ever becoming more.”

“What scared you about your feelings?”

“Not being enough… You’re so amazing and kind and loving, I didn’t think I’d deserve to have a girlfriend like you. I was always out fucking random girls, and it’s not like I can lie about that because you saw it happen and it’s not the biggest secret on campus.”

He pauses for a second to reach for your hand.

“Throughout the years of being friends and spending so much time together, I knew you were different from all those other girls. You saw me date and be with girls all the time but you never once judged me for it or called me names,”

….

“I mean other than Taefucc,, but I know that was more endearing than making fun of me. And I’d have these moments with those girls but when I finished, I’d be thinking about what you were doing. If you were busy so I could come over or if you could come over. At first I assumed it was because you were my best friend and you were ten times more fun than they ever were. Then one night everything changed, I noticed you were distant because you knew I came after my little meetups and still you never said anything. I started to feel guilty about it the more I did it, and then I stopped fucking around as often and only did it once in a while.”

You listen to his every word wanting to know his side and what he had been feeling. It was what you always wanted, to know his real feelings and his fears about it all.

“Then you started hanging out more with hyung and getting drunk with him, being more touchy. I got jealous and I didn’t get it at first, I thought it was because you were my best friend and I didn’t want anyone to steal my spot. It wasn’t until you kissed him that I knew, I was,” he stopped and interlocked our fingers together, “I was, well still am, in love with you. And so I ignored you for those couple days and ignored you even more when it went further, until I couldn’t just sit there and watch it happen. So I made my move and it worked. I had you but I knew I wasn’t good for you.”

“Why do you say that? You always say ‘I’m not enough’ or ‘I’m no good for you’. But you don’t know what’s good for me and what isn’t. If you were no good i’d be in there finding someone else to spend my time with but instead I’m out here listening to you. You know why? Because you are enough to me. I know you have a good heart and that you can be a good ass boyfriend and that you can love without messing up so badly.”

“I don’t understand how you can think that after what I did.”

“Because you aren’t defined by one, or multiple, mistakes you’ve made. You’re much more than your errors, and I see the you behind all that. I see the real you. I’ve seen you cry over cute animal videos and over Moana even though it wasn’t that sad of a movie. I’ve seen you be supportive to those you care so deeply about, like me. You were always there for me no matter the issue and never hesitated to drop everything to make me happy.”

“But you did the same.”

“Well yeah you big dumbo, because I’m in love with you too.”

His tears were falling freely as you both spoke to each other and had a heart to heart. It felt nice, even though you were still hurt about what happened you understood his point of view. You understood where his head was at when he did everything. You weren’t forgiving him by listening, you were allowing yourself to hear him out and think about giving him a second chance.

“I know this isn’t the time and place for this, but I’ve had this sitting on my nightstand for the last month. I only brought it tonight because I knew I’d see you, even though we agreed to meet up tomorrow morning. I was hoping to talk tonight, like this.”

He reaches down his pocket to grab whatever he was talking about. A small velvet black box comes out and is placed on the table. He gently slides it over in front of you and looks at you then back at the box.

“For your birthday, I had told you I had a better surprise waiting for you and I didn’t want to give it in front of everyone because it was too precious for me. I also had a whole speech ready and was going to ask you to be my girlfriend… but as you saw and experienced that didn’t go as planned.”

You chuckle and reach out for the box, “What is it?”

“Open it and find out.”

Your hands gently open the box and a set of earrings in the shape of hearts lay inside, below it, there is a gold necklace just as thin as the one you were wearing. You pull the necklace out and see a small letter T hanging on it; the T had a small diamond on the center of it.

“T as in Troy?” you giggle, “Taehyungie how did you know?”

“Oh gosh, why didn’t I think that through..” he laughs at your HSM reference, “So do you like it?”

“Of course, Tae. They’re beautiful, I love it, you shouldn’t have spent so much money, baby.”

“I wanted to get something special for you that meant something more than a piece of clothing. I’m glad you love it princess.”

You place the necklace back in the box and close it.

“I see you have the old necklace I bought you. It’s cute but this one is better,” He says.

You chuckle at his comment but suddenly a wave of emotions hit you. Maybe this is what he thought would make you fully forgive him. This was his way of winning you over.

“I don’t want you to think this is me trying to win you over. I just wanted you to have it since it was supposed to be special.”

“Thank you. I appreciate it so much Tae.”

“Anything for you, princess.”

You look at your phone and see the time, it’s pretty late, later than you expected it to be. 2:23 a.m.. You both practically missed the entire party, but neither of you cared. This was better than spending two hours with drunk college students. The night was warm but the trees gave you a nice cool breeze which kept the humidity at a low. Now that you’ve both expressed your feeling it didn’t seem like there was much to talk about so you both look up to the sky and let the breeze brush up against your skin. You knew you wanted to give him another chance, he meant so much to you; and you believed in him, although your fears weren’t quite gone yet.

“I’ve said it so many times, it’s starting to lose it’s meaning but I’m sorry baby. I love you, I really do. Even if you can’t give me a second chance at us being together maybe we can try and be friends again. I would take anything, anything at all just to be with you.”

“Prove it.”

“What?”

“I’m not saying I don’t believe you, because I do. But show me, show me you love me. Show me you’re willing to be different and open about love and give me your heart the way I’m willing to give you mine. It’s not easy, I know that. But if you love me it won’t be difficult. I know it’s scary giving someone your all but maybe it’s worth it. Maybe I’m worth it. I know you also have been working on yourself which I’m proud of, but now, work on us.”

“What if I can’t?”

“You don’t know unless you give it a try. You tried to make us work without really putting all your feelings in and communicating, why not try to win me over by being able to communicate your feelings, your fears, your heart, with me. I want you to show me the real you, the man I love with all of my heart. I want to give that man a second chance.”

“I’m scared.”

“That’s okay. I am too.” you reach for his hand, “but that’s part of working things out. Not knowing where things will take us but heading there together.”

He presses your foreheads together and looks into your eyes, “I’ll show you princess. I’ll fight for us, I know you’re fighting for us already and  need to catch up.”

You close the gap between your lips and kiss him softly. He’s a bit surprised by your actions on expecting you to kiss him. But he returns the kiss and smiles as it comes to an end.

“I missed you.” he says.

[multiple-nerdery]

All asks

1. Are looks important in a relationship? Done

2. Are relationships ever worth it? If I thought the answer was no, I wouldn’t be in one so...

3. Are you a virgin? Not since almost a year ago

4. Are you in a relationship? Yes and she’s perfect

5. Are you in love? See above

6. Are you single this year? I am not

7. Can you commit to one person? Can have and am

8. Describe your crush done

9. Describe your perfect mate Its my gf of course she’s perfect

10. Do you believe in love at first sight? Nah. You have to know someone to love them.

11. Do you ever want to get married? I could see it happening. I wouldnt mind if it didn’t. Its way too early inn my life to think about shit like that

12. Do you forgive betrayal? Done

13. Do you get jealous easily? Done

14. Do you have a crush on anyone? Guys I think I might hhave a crush on my gf

15. Do you have any piercings? I want some

16. Do you have any tattoos? I want some

17. Do you like kissing in public? Not if other people are doing it, but so much yes if i’m doing it

20. Do you shower every day? Who tf doesn’t

21. Do you think someone has feelings for you? Guys I think my gf might have a crush on me

22. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now? My gf is asleep so mayybe she’s dreaming about me. (also my bff thinks about me she’s gay andcool)

23. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat? I’ve done it before

24. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years? Doubt it. I won’t even be finished with grad school

25. Do you want to be in a relationship this year? I want to be in the one I’m in

26. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you? Ye

27. Has someone ever written a song or poem for you? done

28. Have you ever been cheated on? not that I know of. Since I trust and care about my exes, I will believe they didn’t unless evidence happens

29. Have you ever cheated on someone? done. but it bears repeating. no. I could never

30. Have you ever considered plastic surgery? If so, what would you change about your body? Nah. It’s too expensive

31. Have you ever cried over a guy/girl? Yep

32. Have you ever experienced unrequited love? Ye boi

33. Have you ever had sex with a man? No

34. Have you ever had sex with a woman? well all of them are nbs. so... i guess also no?

35. Have you ever kissed someone older than you? yep

36. Have you ever liked one of your best friends? yeah friendships are how crushes start for me. not my current best friend though

37. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated? More like one asshole friend who tried to slander the relationship, seduce me out of it, and then when it ended for other reasons, almost immediately accused me of trying to sabotage thier relationship for just being friendly

38. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to? I never expected to like anyone.

39. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have? All the damn time

40. Have you ever written a song or poem for someone? Ye. I recorded a cover once too. I might do that again but would have to choose the song.

41. Have you had sex so far this year? This is the year in which I have had the most sex.

42. How long can you just kiss until your hands start to wander? As long as the person I’m kissing wants

43. How long was your longest relationship? 2 years, 3 months, 29 days but it was on again off again a little bit

44. How many boyfriends/girlfriends have you had? 4, but #3 is the same person as #4

45. How many people did you kiss in 2012/2013? none

46. How many times did you have sex last year? In 2016? No more than like 7

47. How old are you? 18, 19 in 8 days

48. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say? I would cry

49. If you have a boyfriend/girlfriend, what is your favorite thing about him/her? can I say everything she is so cute and perfect oh my god and her sense of humor is great i could just lay around all day watching youtube with her

50. If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept? far as I know, he has nothing to apologize for. I’d be impressed he made it from (Iowa?) to NYC tho. And i love presents i always accept them

51. Is there a boy/girl who you would do absolutely everything for? Yep. She my gf

52. Is there anyone you’ve given up on? Why? Ahngst person. I’m through putting up with their bullshit about abandoning people who care about them. They hurt multiple of my friends, irreparably. They avoided us when we happened to run into them in the coffee shop they work at but then turned around and started low-key stalking my bff. they don’t deserve any affection from me. I don’t hate them, but they can’t be part of my life healthily anymore. Maybe as friends, much further down the road, but they havve to put in the work for that because hell if I’m reaching out to them.

53. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are? Last time I dated her there was.

54. Is there someone you will never forget? most people

55. Share a relationship story. with the person I’m currently dating, before we were dating, wee were both up late at night talking, and she told me to go look at the stars which were pretty, and she was pretty high and so we went to go get food because she was also hungry and we got chicken nuggets and a pie, and then we laid in a field together and watched the stars

56. State 8 facts about your body I’ve got hands, those hands can type, I’ve got some hair, I have a nose, I have functioning (but not well) eyes, im tall, I’m p skinny because teenage metabolism and I like destroying my body recreationally.

57. Things you want to say to an ex #1: how is things in iowa ya nerd. #2: sorry for putting you through some shit, but I’m glad you value what you got out of it. #3: I love you more than anything thanks for asking me back out.

58. What are five ways to win your heart? gotta be cute, then be really nice to me, then hold me in your arms, thentalk with me for hours on end and finally share memes with me

59. What do you look like? Haha nope

60. What is the biggest age difference between you and any of your partners? 1 year 2 months 4 days

61. What is the first thing you notice in someone? whether they are a human or a lizard

62. What is the sexiest thing someone could ever do for/to you? real talk, I’d kind of like someone (who i love and care about) to get on top of me, tie my hands up above my head, slap me a little and call me names. maybe have me wear a collar too. while i struggle to try and touch her. (OR, you know, a loving and caring relationship, the sexiest thing of all)

63. What is your definition of “having sex”? most sexual contact counts

64. What is your definition of cheating? having a romantic or sexual interaction with someone who is not your partner, that your partner either doesn’t know about or doesn’t condone. flirtinng can count

65. What is your favourite foreplay routine? passionate, rolling around the bed/floor makeouts, neck biting, hickey receiving (and to a lesser extent, giving). teasing. lots of teasing.

66. What is your favourite roleplay? Never done any of those. I don’t think that’s really my thing. (My least favorite is daddy/daughter play)

67. What is your idea of the perfect date? spending any time with my GF whatsoever

68. What is your sexual orientation? asexual, but i’m really sex positive. like. sex is nice but i’m not attracted to anyone

69. What turns you off? trypophobia images. bumpinig heads into places they shouldn’t go. condom breaking. parents coming home thats a big one.

70. What turns you on? being bitten, being pushed down, being challenged in a sexual context, driving esp at night, the idea of doing things in someone elses bed (as long as its clean and they don’t find out), holding hands

71. What was your kinkiest wet dream? I haven’t had a wet dream in a long time, and the last time i did, it was about fucking a chair so.... eh

72. What words do you like to hear during sex? any variant of “oh that feels so good oh my god mmm yes right there don’t stop fuck me harder” and various pleasure moans

73. What’s something sweet you’d like someone to do for you? love and cherish me forever.

74. What’s the most superficial characteristic you look for? does she have a face i could stare at all day and not get bored of it?

75. What’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for you? romantically, making out in the backseat of a moving car. platonically, driving the car so me and the other person could make out in the backseat even though we were supposed to go home. There’s more i’m sure but I can’t think of them

76. What’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever done for someone? dunno.

77. What’s your opinion on age differences in relationships? some age differences are okay. some are not. For instance, I’m gonna be 19 next sunday (not tomorrow) and my GF is 17, 18 in october. That’s an okay age gap. 16-20 is not. It has to do more with experience than age, though, since a 16 year old is a child in high school, and a 20 year old is a grown adult in college

78. What’s your dirtiest secret? who I lost my virginity to

79. When was the last time you felt jealous? Why? my gf commented positively on the photo of one of her past crushes. recently. I was worry but I trust her and I know she loves me

80. When was the last time you told someone you loved them? last night

81. Who are five people you find attractive? my gf, my girlfriend, my significant other, my partner and the girl that I love (they’re all the same person)

82. Who is the last person you hugged? shit its been a while i don’t even know

83. Who was your first kiss with? my first bf

84. Why did your last relationship fail? she wasn’t in the right place to be dating at the time. but she is now, and I love her more than anything

85. Would you ever date someone off of the Internet? iunno