#a level of personal-ness there. i know how it is!! i used to fucking rp a semi-self insert minecraft character it is HARD to NOT project!!

[misnomera]

On racial stereotyping of the Haans in TMA...

Right so as someone who is ethnically Chinese I have NO FUCKING clue how I didn’t notice this more distinctly in my initial binge of tma (going too fast and not paying closer attention to character names and descriptions, probably) but the Haan family storyline is, all horror elements aside, pretty fucked up in terms of racial representation re: stereotyping. This got long as hell, but please please please take a moment to read through if you’ve got time for it. thanks.

To start off, the Haans are one of the few characters in tma with an explicitly specified race and ethnicity—Chinese—and pretty much the only explicitly Chinese characters in tma, other than the mostly unimportant librarian (Zhang Xiaoling) from Beijing. But like, Haan isn’t even a properly Chinese surname, at least not in the way that it’s spelled in canon (it should be Han, one a. A quick google search tells me that Haan as a surname has...Dutch origins??).

Of course, that could be chalked up to shoddy anglicization processes within family histories, which certainly isn’t uncommon with immigrant families, so I’m not going to dwell on names too much (although I also find it interesting that John Haan’s name is so specifically and weirdly anglicized that he changed his own surname?? Hun Yung to John Haan is a very big leap of a name change and frankly not very believable. ANYWAY, this is not that important. I don’t expect Jonny, a white Englishman, to come up with perfectly unquestionable non-Cho-Chang-like Chinese names, though it certainly would be nice. Moving on).

What really bothers me about the Haans is how they almost exclusively and explicitly play into negative Chinese immigrant stereotypes. I don’t even feel like I need to say it because it’s like...it’s literally Right There, folks. John Haan (in ep 72) owns and operates a sketchy takeout restaurant. They’re all avatars of the Flesh—and John Haan is Specifically horrific and terrifying because he cooked his wife’s human meat and fed it to his unknowing customers. Does that remind you of any stereotypes which accuse Chinese people of consuming societally unacceptable and ethically questionable things like dog/cat/bat meat (which, if it’s not already crystal fucking clear, we don’t. do that.), which in turn characterize us as horrible unfeeling monsters? John Haan’s characterization feeds (haha, badum tss) directly into this harmful stereotype that have caused very real pain for Chinese people and East Asians in general. 

And Jonny does nothing to address that from within his writing (and not out of it either). And, speaking on a more meta level, Jonny could’ve easily had these flesh avatars be individuals of any race (like, what’s Jared Hopworth’s ethnicity? Do we know? No? Well then). Conversely, he could’ve easily, easily had a Chinese person be an avatar of any other entity. So why did he have to chose specifically the Flesh?

(This is a rhetorical question. You know why. Racial stereotyping and invoking a fear of the other in an attempt to enhance horror, babey~)

On Tom Haan’s side, Jonny seems weirdly intent on having other characters repeatedly comment on his accent (or rather, lack thereof) in relation to his race. Think about how, in ep 30 (killing floor), the fact that Tom Haan had spoken a line to the statement giver in “perfect English” was an emphasized beat in that statement, and a beat that was supposed to be “chilling” and meant to signify to us that something was, quote-unquote, “not right” with Tom Haan. Implicitly, that’s saying that it was unexpected, not “normal”, and in this case even eerie, for someone who looks Chinese to have spoken in fluid, unbroken English. Mind you, the line itself was perfectly scary on its own (“you cannot stop the slaughter by closing the door”), so why did Jonny feel the need to note the accent in which it was spoken in? Why did Jonny HAVE to have that statement giver note, that he initially “wasn’t even sure how much English [Haan] spoke”? 

This happens again in episode 72 with a Chinese man (and again, his ethnicity is Explicitly Noted) who we assume is also Tom Haan. This one is rather ironically funny and kind of painfully self aware, because the statement giver expresses surprise at Haan’s “crisp RP accent” and then immediately “felt bad about making the assumption that he couldn’t speak English,” and subsequently admitted that thought was “low-key racist.” Like, from a writing perspective, this entire passage is roundabout, pointless, and says absolutely nothing helpful to enhance the horror genre experience for listeners (instead it just sounded like some sort of half-assed excuse so Jonny or other listeners could say “look! We’ve addressed the racism!” You didn’t. It just made me vaguely uncomfortable). And again, having other people comment on our accents/lack thereof while assuming we are foreign is a Very Real microaggression that east asians face on the daily. If Jonny needed some filler sentences for pacing he could’ve written about Literally anything else. So why point out, yet again, that the crazy murderous man was foreign and Chinese? 

At this point, you might say, right, but yknow, it was just that the statement givers were kind of racist! It happens! Yeah sure, ok, that’s a passable in-universe explanation for descriptions of Tom Haan (though not John Haan, mind you), but the statement givers are fake made up people, and statement’s still written by Jonny, who absolutely has all the power to write overt discrimination out of his stories. And he does! Think about just how many minor (and major!!) characters are so, so carefully written as completely aracial, and do not have their ethnicity implicated at all in whatever horrors they may or may not be committing. Think about how many lgbtq+ characters have given statements, and have been in statements, without having faced direct forms of discrimination, or portrayed as embodying blatant stereotypes in their stories (though lgbtq+ rep in tma certainly has their own issues that I won’t go into here). Jonny can clearly write characters this way, and he can do it well. So why, why, am I being constantly, repeatedly reminded in-text of the fact that the Haans are East Asian, that they’re from China, that they’re Chinese immigrants, that they’re second-generation British Chinese or whatever the fuck, and that they’re also horrifying conduits for blood, gore, and general fucked-up-ness? It’s absolutely not something that is Needed for the stories to be an effective piece of horror; the only thing it does is perpetuate incredibly harmful and hurtful stereotypes.

And listen, I love tma to bits. It’s taken over my blog. I’ve really loved my interactions with the fandom. And I am consistently blown away by Jonny’s writing and how well he’s able to weave foreshadowing and plot into an incredibly complex collection of stories. But I absolutely Cannot stop thinking about the Haans because it’s just. It’s such a blatant display of racial stereotyping in writing. And I’ve certainly seen a few voices talking about it here and there, and I don’t know if I’m just not looking in the right places, but it certainly feels like something that is just straight up not on the radar for a lot of tma fans. And I’m disappointed about that. 

Just, I don’t know. Take a look at those episodes again and do some of your own thinking about why these characters had to be specifically Chinese (answer: they didn’t.). And in general, PLEASE for the love of god turn a critical eye on character portrayals and descriptions whenever they are assigned specific races/ethnicities (Some examples that come to mind are Jude Perry, Annabelle Cane, and Diego Molina), because similar issues, to an extent, extend beyond the Haans, though I haven’t covered them here. 

You shouldn’t need a POC to do point out these problems for you when they’re so glaringly There. But for those of you who really didn’t know, hope this was informative in some way. I’m tired, man. If some of the only significant Chinese characters you write are violent cannibalistic men with a perverted relationship with meat, just don’t do it. Please don’t do it. 

EDIT: Since the making of this post Jonny has acknowledged and apologized for these portrayals on his twitter and in the Rusty Quill Operations Update, which went up September 2020. A long time coming, but better late than never. This of course doesn’t necessarily negate the harm done by Jonny’s writing, and doesn’t make me much less angry about it, but is appreciated nonetheless. For more on this topic there’s a lot of productive discussions happening in my “#tma crit” tag and in the notes of this post

[colony22graphics]

            ❝Shine on,                  diamond.❞

◆ member since: nov. 22, 2013 ◆ longest character: alexander donovan ◆

@alexander-donovan, Well, here we go. 

Rory, there's no way on earth I could possibly describe what you've done for this community. Aside from making it all in the first place, constructing the post-apocalyptic sandbox we all hold so dear, you also pay attention to how it's executed---from basic principles of operation and how we ought to respect each other as players, down to the smallest, weirdest headcanon. It matters to you---which I think is probably the best way to summarize your energy and wisdom, the Rory-ness of it all: 

Things matter. People matter. Caring matters. 

In a world where we're pretty damn used to moving from one diversion to the next at a moment's notice, you make something that's absolutely set apart by saying, resolutely and passionately, that what we do here really matters.

And you're right, to think that. If you need any further proof that you---Rory---matter, you can look at me writing this damn letter (and swearing every three sentences, sorry). But you in your extremely Ro way, said hey, six years fucking matters, and so do all the people we play with, so let’s get mushy on the main and tell them. And I can tell you to your face you're right and this was a stellar idea because... I do that now. Because of your influence, I'm a better person, one who does actually try and tell people what I think. 

You challenge people to care, and to translate their caring into something others can recognize, and reciprocate. You’re never afraid to point out the importance of saying things and leaving a meaningful mark, becoming an active part of our community instead of staying in our own heads (as introverts on the internet are prone to doing).

You're also a hell of a writer, which is inspirational in itself, and I can’t leave that out of it. Your dedication to your characters, to their motivations and struggles, shines through in every post you make, and you don't let fear or insecurity take root or stop you from doing what you love. You know it's not about achieving perfection, but about collaboration and growth. The way we write is an exercise in discipline and embracing the joys of language, it's not meant to be fine art (though a lot of the stuff you come up with off the cuff blurs the line between the two on a regular basis.) It's really very rude how talented you are. 

I won't talk too much more about you and me personally because you already know it pretty well, but I will mention that when I offered to help out with tech stuff, you don't even know how impossible being a full mod felt for me, at the time. I'd just come out of some rough experiences and was ready to never do that again. But over the years, you gave me steps that I could take only when I felt comfortable, and let me accept only the responsibility that I thought I could manage (though you always told me you knew I was more than capable of handling it). In a very real way, with your patience and understanding, you gave me back my confidence, and my willingness to be vulnerable. That's something I won't ever forget.  

You have my respect and my friendship, always.

And dear lord, if Tumblr has managed not to self-destruct in the next five or ten years, I really hope we're still around doing this shit. No place I'd rather be.

Love you, Ro.

<3 Lottie.

(Oh, by the way, I took the liberty of adding something else, under the cut. I knew that I would never be able to cover everything, and that I’d run out of words, so I turned to others to fill in the gaps and maybe it’ll help convey it all a little more properly. Many thanks to everyone.)  ❤

         —-     Happy Colony 6th Anniversary      —-

     RO, YOU ARE AN ABSOLUTE GIFT. I’m incredibly grateful all those years ago I saw that Bones bio and decided to join this crazy little family because that is exactly what you have created with the Colony: You have made a family. You have always been a pleasure to write with, a hard-working and careful admin, and now this second go-round I'm happy to call you a good friend. I wanted to mirror your sentiment on my anniversary post, it is amazing how time rewards our patience with this second meeting! I owe you a very real debt because thanks to this group when a friend let me down whilst I was on a different goddamn continent, thanks to you, I found Cassie there to help me out! The group is an extension of you: thoughtful, kind, emotional, and funny as hell.                                                                                                             - Nicola

     Rory, your dedication to the Colony (and previously Belvedere) astounds me every day. Writing with you is an absolute joy, thank you for all that you do for us!!                                                                                                             - Cassie

     RO HOLY COW!! It's insane to think of being part of something so wonderful for so long, I can't imagine how proud you must be to call this place home. I absolutely love writing with every character I've gotten to interact with, you approach your characters and this RPG with such a passion, it's always made getting to be part of it all the more special to me! To many years to come!                                                                                                              - Molly

     The things I admire most about you are your kindness, your compassion, your understanding and the way you always make the best of a situation. You've been nothing but welcoming and kind to me since I've had the privilege of joining this insanely talented and incredible group, and every day I am in awe of the love and care and detail you pour into the rpg. You have been so supportive over these past few months, every day I consider myself insanely lucky to have met you. I adore you and I'm so happy for you that you've come so far in your own personal journey, you truly do deserve all the happiness in the world.                                                                                                             - Lou

     Ro, you’re an absolutely wonderful mod and person. I’ve never met a more dedicated and creative mod in all my years on this website. You’re an astounding writer and creator who leaves me wanting to be better. You’re a wonderful person to write with and an even better friend. I love you and all the work you do for everyone in this group. Thank you for creating this fantastic place and starting this wonderful family.                                                                                                              - Lee

     Thanks for always being so open and welcoming! It's been such a blast writing with you.                                                                                                             - Ren

     Your commitment to this game and its players is absolutely next level, and it shines through in literally everything you do for us. I haven’t felt so at home and so comfortable in an RP in such a long time, possibly ever, and I know so much of that has to do with the amazing environment (both IC and OOC) you’ve spent such a long time painstakingly and lovingly cultivating. This RP wouldn't be the incredible space it is without such an incredible and dedicated team of mods. I hope you know how much I appreciate all you do, and how much I flippin' love ya!                                                                                                              - Alex

     Rory, you're a perfect admin and an amazing friend! You've always made me feel so welcome here, from day one, and my heart feels warm and fuzzy when I think of you. I utterly adore all your characters and your writing is just brilliant, it's always so much fun to brainstorm and write and plot with you. Thank you, thank you, thank you!                                                                                                              - Ellie

     When an rp has a lifespan of not just a year or two, but SIX FREAKIN YEARS, you must look to your leader. Ships don’t sail without a captain, and you have been the most loyal, loving, and adventurous captain to your crew. Congratulations on this amazing accomplishment, love. xoxo.                                                                                                              - Amy

     Rory, I just wanted to thank you for how welcome you've made me feel since I joined the group. It takes a special person to be an admin (dedicated, patient, and just a little bit weird), and the six years you've been running this group is a testament to how well you do it. You've got incredible creativity and passion, and I know I'm not the only one that feels so lucky to write with you in this world you've built. Congratulations on six years! Here's to many more.                                                                                                             - Nick

     RORUUUUU. I literally have no idea where my life would be now if I'd never met you. I've said it before and I'll say it again, you inspire me to be braver and stronger and more self-loving. Thank you for being my friend even after all these years.                                                                                                             - Mika

I don’t think I can concisely put into words how much you mean to me, but I’ll try: we first met in 2012 and through all these years you’ve continually inspired me with your talent and hard work. You’re more than just an incredible friend, you’re an ICONIC leader that has the determination and talent to keep this group running for six amazing years (with the help of your equally talented and wonderful co-mod, naturally, wink wonk). The Colony is a family to me, and I think to all of us, even before it’s a writing group. It couldn’t be what it is today without someone as tirelessly understanding and creative at its helm. You’re an absolute gift, you’ve been there for me through thick and thin, and I’m grateful every day that I get to call you a friend.                                                                                                             - Maddie

     Ro, you have been so kind and amazing since day one! You have this astonishing energy and a kindness that honestly makes the colony feel like another home. You’re such a phenomenal writer, and have made this rp a community like no other. I can’t quite put into words how much I appreciate you, and how much effort you put into everything you do. You’re so talented and I feel incredibly lucky to say I’m a part of this community. Thank you for being you. xxx.                                                                                                             - El

     The Colony has been a living, breathing world in which to create, and the key piece - creativity - is embedded in your DNA. You aren't just an enthusiastic mod. In some aspects you are the Col. I know you want everyone to feel included and allowed to be inspired by the writing of others rather than hemmed in by rules and egos so many other groups have. Thank you for throwing all your characters at me when one of mine has some wild scheme. I've said before your writing is cinematic in its expression and it always challenges me to want to (try to) write on a higher level. I'm grateful to have you as a sounding board when I get stuck in the mud of my own self-doubt with writing. Thank you for just being a friend as well and letting me ramble too. It is impossible to sum up this wildest of rides out of all my writing adventures so, much love, as always. xx.                                                                                                             - Cat

[mikzhyu]

Like, a summary of the plot and what happened in it? Or a retelling if you want to. I’m rlly curious. Oh this is rp Anon

for as far as we got up to before we stopped roleplaying it, the rp itself spanned over i think... 5 years. here’s a timeline with a brief description of what happens where.

i’m explaining the whole roleplay here, not just claus and giygas, and it’s also been a while (this was done over voice, not text) so bear with me.

i’ll add whatever doodles i had done of things that happened.

the rp takes place post-mother 3, like, immediately so. lucas wakes up once the world has been reset via the dragon and starts just, well, sadly going about his business. it’s only when -- i believe -- someone caught wind that someone was inside of the graveyard. when lucas went, it was actually claus, who had been brought back to life somehow after his death. they check to see if lucas’ wish fully came true, only to find that hinawa had not been brought back as well. (lucas wished for everything to return back to him... which included his brother and mother.)

soon after that, more strange sightings started. first was ninten, who promptly found ana being attacked by zombies in the graveyard. i don’t remember where lloyd came in. this is under the assumption that teddy had died at the end of mother 1. ninten has no clue how they got there, as they were just coming down mt. itoi from fighting giegue.

the earthbound crew was next; ness washing up from the beach, and honest to god i don’t remember where the other 3 appeared from. ness and co were taken from just after ness awakening to his powers in magicant.

the last person to appear out of nowhere was locria, of all people. not even they knew why or how they were alive.

that’s a lie, whoops. porky also was no longer in his weird orb thing or whatever. yeah, that spooks lucas and co. ness is confused as to why pokey is here too and why people are calling him porky. and why they’re so damn scared of him, of all things.

uhh.... blah blah, don’t remember stuff, probably a few weeks pass or whatever. yes, ness gets painfully homesick. no, they haven’t figured out a solution yet. they still don’t know how are why they all got here at all or why monsters are still appearing from everywhere.

i believe.... the next major plotpoint was that dr. andonuts managed to build/rebuild a replica time machine that the earthbound squad used to go and fight giygas fair and square, hoping that that’d set everything right again. they think they manage to defeat him, as he disappears at the end of the battle. they come back more or less safely.

very, very soon after they return claus starts to feel ill. like, really ill. in fact, he ends up shrieking in pain and ultimately shutting down without warning. i think dr. andonuts didn’t really find anything wrong with him, just that he overheated, but he couldn’t find a reason why.

once claus reawakens, he starts having weird thoughts, like a voice in the back of his head. strange deaths start to happen in tazmily, but nobody knows how or why. claus ultimately blames ninten and co for it, where ninten immediately lashes back out at him saying something really nasty, like “why should we trust you anyway? you worked under the enemy and served as their robot slave.” ninten, unfortunately, doesn’t even know why he said this and well, they kind of have a big fight. it would have ended poorly if ana hadn’t have stepped in when she did.eventually, claus starts to notice these weird things happening to himself. he tries to talk to lucas about it in his fear, but, well....

....yeah, that’s where this comic came from. claus literally shuts down without warning when he tries to say anything. ana even mentions soon enough that she feels a horrible evil energy radiating from claus and expresses her concern.

yadda yadda, again don’t remember these bits... i believe they do eventually realize that, somehow, giygas has taken shelter inside of claus. giygas is still weak of course, so he’s not able to do much other than slightly influence claus using his more mechanical parts.

for some wack ass reason, locria shows up. they tell lucas and co. off saying that they’re not here to cause any kind of issue, just mentioning that the only thing they hate more than them was giygas for destroying magicant. they offer to seal giygas away, and after much inner turmoil, claus agrees and inevitably gets stabbed with a needle to seal him away. the seal is then kept in osohe castle.

and for 4 years, it stays there. monsters still appear but are far less aggressive and don’t appear as often. claus doesn’t hear a peep from giygas during this time, and everyone typically spends their time just trying to find a way to get the mother 1 + 2 crew back to their proper timelines. they don’t succeed. (irrelevant to the plot, but ninten + ana get together as well as lucas + ness.)

during these years, giygas had been recovering his energy again. of course, it required far more to even try and sneak his power out from the seal, but inevitably he does. using claus’ self-doubt and self-loathing, giygas managed to influence him enough to pull the needle while he’s not thinking correctly. locria doesn’t sense the danger until it’s too late, and inevitably they fade back away.

giygas is now in complete control of claus. all claus can do is watch from the back of his mind as his own body does such unspeakable things.

after this, claus, the egg of light, and lloyd all go missing. it’s easy to assume why claus and the egg of light are missing (the egg contains all the information giygas wants after all), but nobody knew how or why lloyd went missing.

some time passes. giygas is eventually located and at first a small group goes to scout ahead while the others deal with another issue, probably all the monsters overrunning tazmily. ness is the first to find him, and ends up having to fight him alone -- which ends very, very poorly. ness gets sucked back into (earthbound’s) magicant, where giygas manages to completely shatter his mind into pieces, rendering the boy completely emotionless and unable to do anything by himself.

everyone else arrives later on, and there’s a huge fight between everyone and giygas, who is now puppeteering ness. it only ends when everyone realizes they need to retreat, as most of everyone takes near-fatal damage in the fight. i believe ninten and poo manage to teleport everyone back, where lucas realizes in horror that they left ness behind. or something. they left someone behind. lucas learns how to use teleport here, since everyone else is far too exhausted to do it again. when they come back, giygas and ness are gone.

more time passes. still, nobody knows where giygas, ness, or lloyd are. lucas at this point is uh... not feeling too hot, and tensions are at an all-time high. during this time there’s a scene where giygas and ness are taking residence in whatever the heck lab is in mother 3 (sorry it’s been a while), and lloyd shows up, presenting the egg of light to giygas. giygas realizes he doesn’t know how to pull the information out of the egg and just shoves it off onto ness to hold onto for a while.

oh yeah, i forgot something related to porky happened here. i don’t remember how it ended, but giygas encountered porky here, who reveals that he has done the unthinkable -- he’s gone back in time to literally steal his younger self’s body so that he’s far more flexible again.

that’s more important than it sounds. because, using the egg of light’s power, queen maria manages to reach the depths of ness’ mind still somehow tucked away and rotting and guides him back to his robot body to help him fix all of this.

eventually giygas figures he needs to seek out the guardian of the egg of light, who happens to be kumatora. he more or less just shows up on their doorstep and threatens to kill everyone if she doesn’t. he nearly does, too, because kumatora doesn’t know how to open the egg either, but in her distress as duster is beginning to die away from giygas’ attacks, she manages to get it open somehow. giygas ultimately releases duster to grab the egg, leaving him still alive, albeit barely.

i don’t remember how, but one of the robot bodies that dr. andonuts made shows up and shoves the puppet ness away from everyone, stopping him from killing them all. giygas commands puppet ness to get rid of it, and the two duke it out for a while, before the robot casts a really high level of starstorm and just absolutely knocks puppet ness the fuck out. the robot then walks over, grabs the hat that puppet ness dropped, and sticks it on his head, signifying that he’s ness’ mind taking residence there.

giygas decides he needs to take measures into his own hands and tries to dip into the robot’s mind again like he had done with ness before to try and squish out that dying light. it’s here that he finds that it’s maria herself that is protecting ness, and giygas simply cowers in fear and despair from her. robot ness is able to deliver the final blow on him, knocking giygas right back into the deep recesses of claus’ mind. ness is able to merge back into his proper body.

surprisingly, this is the part where i start remembering less... even though it’s the most recent stuff that happened. i think there was another little time skip? not too big of one, though. during this time, more and more chimeras start appearing and attacking tazmily rather than just all the random beings being overly aggressive. ness and lucas go out somewhere in the mountains together, only for the two of them to end up stuck in moonside somehow.

ness and lucas get separated here, but using that one dude from earthbound who fucking died in moonside’s guidance, lucas manages to find ness and get them both out of moonside.

except, when they return, nobody can see ness. and... there’s another ness still in tazmily? we’ll call them ghost!ness and other!ness. yeah, there’s a lot of nesses in this rp. lucas doesn’t quite trust other!ness, believing that it’s some sort of moonside trick and he’s there to hurt everyone. but of course, nobody believes lucas that ghost!ness is even there or exists.

eventually, after ninten and ana figure out that they can see ghost!ness, they use the method of a pop quiz and find out that ghost!ness is the fake one after all. it’s far too late, though, because ghost!ness drags the whole gang straight into moonside together, revealing himself to actually be moonside!ness, the new manimani that porky made using giygas’ power he’d captured long ago.

and.... that’s about as far as we got. we stopped right when everyone entered moonside and never returned to the roleplay.

if you have any further questions or want specifications for stuff, just ask? i’m happy to talk about it, haha. i hope at least most things made sense.

[hellomisterriddle]

Questions About Creating Your OCs

‘Cause sometimes the stories of how OCs come to be are just as interesting as the OCs, themselves. Tell me how your virtual kids came into the world.

(from that ask meme i just reblogged; here are all my answers)

I’m using HotSpot/Hester Heights for this

What was the first element of your OC that you remember considering (name, appearance, backstory, etc.)?

His looks! The first thing i remember wanting was to make sure he looked like a fuckboi

Did you design them with any other characters/OCs from their universe in mind?

Sorta not really??? Like I only knew what a hand full of characters looked like in Neoapolis at the time, so mostly I worked on making him look like a foil to my other OC, Regal.

How did you choose their name?

HotSpot was an easy enough name to think of. I wanted something kinda dudebro-y and it basically chose itself lmao Hester Heights on the other hand... I’m pretty sure I was thinking of literature and just combined withering heights with that girl from....that one book.... crucible??? scarlet letter??? cant remember sklgjskfljjs

Also fun fact i didnt know hester was a girl name until i googled it way later agdjfkfk

In developing their backstory, what elements of the world they live in played the most influential parts?

Definitely the Reputation levels and Celebritism that runs in the veins of Neoapolis. I knew HotSpot needed to be molded by that system and manipulated into thinking that all that mattered was being rich and famous

Is there any significance behind their hair color?

Long and Blond made me think of surfer dudes and fuckbois

Is there any significance behind their eye color?

Yes!! So his eyes aren’t one specific color--I call them “molten” so the’re basically like a lava lamp of fiery colors. My favorite to use is gold (think idris elba as heimdall) 

Is there any significance behind their height?

Nyeheheh yes--I just wanted him to be shorter than most, adds some fire to him if he’s ever teased about it

What (if anything) do you relate to within their character/story?

Are they based off of you, in some way?

(we’re basically the same person tbh--he’s just more vocal) 

If they have an LI, how much of their character is tailored to be compatible to that person?

ZERO LMAO when i first made him i had no idea he’d have the bae he eventually has

however--its a different story.........later on...............

Did you know what the OC’s sexuality would be at the time of their creation?

Nope! I didn’t know a lot about him when i made him tbh--I just needed a foil to my other character. i didn’t expect to get so invested in this asshole. Although i always used to imagine him surrounded by hordes of women before i eventually decided on making him pan

What have you found to be most difficult about creating art for your OC (any form of art: writing, drawing, edits, etc.)?

Writing. Writing HotSpot is so fucking hard. He’s so fucking unpredictable, I have to constantly double, triple checked with myself to make sure ‘hey is this in character??’ its damn near impossible

How far past the canon events that take place in their world have you extended their story, if at all?

LMAOOOO OKAY FUNNY STORY UHHHH

so HotSpot is an OC in an rp group...an rp group that hasn't started yet sfjghfjgdf LOL;;;; sooooo while me and my gf figure out the logistics of this group, we just went ahead and started rping shit that wouldn’t necessarily require others’ characters yet! our rps themselves have only gone 2-6 years in the future, but we have like... ideas and aus that go up to like 10yrs in the future sdfjgkfg

If you had to narrow it down to 2 things that you MUST keep in mind while working with your OC, what would those things be?

His recklessness/temper and his complicated feeling for his bae (at first winkwonk)

What is something about your OC can make you laugh?

his fuckboi-ness lmaooo

What is something about your OC can make you cry?

oh man--and this has happened before, i’ve cried rping about this--but how much he ruined his own life with his unchecked emotions

Is there some element you regret adding to your OC or their story?

Kinda wish I hadn’t killed his sister for the manpain fgkldjflhk i mean to be fair it only effected him subconsciously, but still... wish she still lived :(

What is the most recent thing you’ve discovered about your OC?

im constantly discovering all sorts of things with HotSpot/Hester thanks to how little i thought about him when i first made him. The most recent one thoooo...

OH!! LOL it was from our most recent RP!! I discovered that while Hester doesn’t mind waking up early, he very much minds it when he’s woken up earlier than he has to be fjgdlfjhd 

What is your favorite fact about your OC?

like...fact fact, as in a random fact or like... fact as in anything about who he is in general??? immm...gonna take it as the latter...

my favorite thing about hotspot/hester is how he gets better. its something im proud of in him, and something i want to do too. 

[suzume-xiv]

“ 🔥 “ Shipping. “ 🔥 “ RP Combat. “ 🔥 “ Tumblr Addiction. And “ 🔥 “ Your To Partner. [Pay back is a beeeeatch.] XoxoX

(lol pssh!!)

When it comes to shipping, I think it’s important to remember that there is another person on the other side of the screen. Where that might not be such an unpopular opinion, it does seem to be uncommon for people to remember that there is someone else invested in that ship. That’s also their time, their effort and their feelings you need to consider. When you drop off and stop replying, or wander off to rp other characters or with other characters while ignoring that ship you agreed to... I just feel that’s not fair to them. If you’re no longer interested in a ship, SAY SO. Far too often people just don’t say something in attempts to “save” someone’s feelings. But really? You’re only trying to avoid feeling bad or guilty. Pure selfishness drives people to lie and string someone along, along with possible greed of wanting to keep someone on the line just in case you want them later. I think people who do that are crappy people and I don’t apologize for thinking that. So unpopular opinion: When you ship, whether with one or two or three etc people, you should WANT to devote at least a good portion of your time to that ship, it’s only fair imo.

RP Combat, I’m not sure I have an unpopular opinion about but maybe the one thing I seem to debate the most is the merits of using PvP or ooc skills/level when determining combat outcomes. Where I understand your lvl 70 monk can probably oocly kick my lvl 60 ninja’s butt but that doesn’t mean, ICly, you 18 year old puggy can win against my 32 year old retired ninja. There are factors to consider and if you say you can defeat my ninja JUST because you have all your chakra’s unlocked, then you and I will not get along well. No one likes to lose, I get that, (actually I don’t mind losing) but you can’t win every single time just because you don’t want your character to look “weak”. Combat is NOT fair. Pure and simple. I use rolls because it makes people feel more comfortable, but I also don’t mind the “honor system” so to speak, where you free write. You know your character and you should know their flaws, if your character doesn't have flaws, then I’m sorry that your character is so single dimensional. So where I agree that sometimes, depending on place and time and circumstances, rolling for combat is a good compromise, I feel free writing and understanding you can NOT win all the time is the best way to go. OOC factors such as level and skills have no place in RP UNLESS the skills fall within lore of course.

Tumblr addiction... I’m not sure I have an opinion on that lol. Addiction of any kind is bad, and like any addiction, if you find yourself falling into that, it would be advisable to take a break. That may not be the desired course of action but it is the most responsible. If left unchecked, it could lead to depression and feeling like you need to lash out at people on anon because you don’t get your way or because you feel ignored. It’s unhealthy to be so attached to something that you lash out at people for not going along with whatever it is you think they should, such as have an unpopular opinion. ;)

And an unpopular opinion about my rp partner?!! Hmmm is this in general or specific? I’ll go with specific! I’ve seen a lot of hate go across her dash now and then and heard of some pretty awful things. I know how some of that feels and some of it I can’t imagine enduring and still trying to press on in rp and with friendships with people. But she does and she gives it everything she’s got. Some view that as a flaw, clingy or some other negative trait, and think she should change. Some have ended things because what they agreed to they changed their mind about or felt they were being treated unfairly when they were told from the start what to expect. But to me, those very traits people turn their noses up at, are traits I find enduring, sure things won’t always be easy and no one’s perfect. There will be things to work through but the most important thing is we do it together. You can’t expect to someone to give you 100% all the time and when you just don’t feel like giving it back, think they’ll stick around. You have to give in kind and the worst thing you could do is pretend that it’s their fault that your feelings have changed. So that “clingy-ness” everyone apparently tries to avoid, that “jealousy” they think is an attempt to be controlling, I know different. I know because I can relate and in my unpopular opinion, though sometimes we will spend an evening just working through things, those are traits I will gladly take on because they are who she is and she is an amazing person I am extremely lucky to have met. And even if we never would have started to rp, I would still do my best to be a good friend to her because she deserves nothing but the best from people. Not a second choice, not a back up plan, but THE plan. THE choice. So to her haters, passive aggressive or straight up aggressive, fuck off. She’s mine now and she’s amazing, you can just get glad in the same pants you got mad in. I will do everything in my ability to make sure she never feels like something is “wrong” with her because of the crap people have told her. Unpopular opinion: fuck you guys.

:P thanks for the ask! @dierin

[nightblink]

Blink Reads Oathbringer - Chapters Two, Three, and Four

Chapter Two – One Problem Solved

Hello Adolin, my sun son, I have also missed you so.

Good man, taking charge and organizing your people just like you've been raised to. Find that purpose in usefulness. Find that distraction. You're going to need it.

Heralds, I'm a terrible person, but I want you to b r e a k.

That's not almost a relief, that is a relief that they found the body, because you are too honest for your own good and The Worst Liar and it's going to tear you apart inside trying to keep this a secret. It's almost a tiny weight off of your shoulders, being discovered and that small step closer to your own Damnation, isn't it?

Oh shit, Dalinar calling out Teft by name-

“Looking for him? You lost your highprince.” Why do I find this so fucking funny. It's such a little thing and yet I'm cackling.

'connoisseur of death' – Dalinar why you gotta be so Extra(tm)

(we all know why, it's a Kholin Genetic Affliction)

I was listening to The Way of Kings not long ago and it sticks out as Dalinar catalogues Sadeas' face and wound that Adolin likes to and is skilled at using his fists while on the battlefield. Also managed the overpowering and stabbing while beat to shit and with at least a broken wrist. If he'd actually managed to get Sadeas in the ring, I'd give the man under a minute, if Adolin didn't drag the 'fight' out for the vicious pleasure of it.

SEBARIAL AND PALONA, AYYYY

'He didn't trust most of the highprinces farther than the wind could blow them.” Dalinar. Dalinar you do know that you live in the stormlands, where I know that a Highstorm's stormwall has been known to lift boulders and carry large trees at least 640 kilometers. The wind can blow anyone pretty damn far.

…..actually, that explains everything, considering how easily you trust.

(Wisdom was your dump stat, wasn't it. Ten sapphires says you have a negative modifier for Insight.)

Palona says what we're all thinking. Give that woman a medal and a nice spa day.

L o r d I forgot how much I liked Sebarial and his combination of common sense (for a Highprince) and snark.

[whistles] I knew Urithiru was massive, but that description puts my visualization on a wholly different scale. Ten tiers, each of eighteen levels? Is 18 going to be another number to watch out for?

RICE PADDY ROCKBUD FIELDS

BrandoSando what powers do the squires osmose from their Radiant. I want a list broken down in detail, stat.

Bridge Four, never change.

Dalinar. Dalinar, he would have undermined you at every turn. Forget uniting Roshar, you wouldn't have been able to unite Alethkar with Sadeas sowing dissent and tearing down everything you try to build! Think what you may, but Adolin did what must be done.

Good man, Aladar. Good to know that you can change when faced with new information. Sebarial being Highprince of Commerce was practically guaranteed from the point we heard of him building a proper economy on the Shattered Plains. Adolin as Dalinar's right hand and general was a given.

But what is Renarin to do, other than attempt to figure out his powers? It's a high-priority task, to be sure, but Dalinar, couldn't you entrust a little less personal of a responsibility to him as well? Make him feel like part of the greater whole rather than set aside as he's always been…?

[sighs] I suppose we'll see how this plays out.

Chapter 3 – Momentum

Ohhhhh, and here we get one of the three chapters released way long ago that I did read.

'Rockbuds crunched like skulls beneath Dalinar's boots' What a line what an iconic line-

Almighty Dalinar you were more arrogant than Adolin easy; you can damn well see where he gets it from

This entire visual is glorious and I'm reveling in the descriptive flavour. Who needs a movie when this plays out in the imagination so well?

He can make a line of spearmen waver with just a war cry, Heralds

I said it the first time I read this chapter and it keeps running through my head – the Blackthorn is fucking terrifying

Even now, he's having trouble feeling the Thrill, or at least getting it to catch and hold. I can't imagine he was anything close to proto-Radiant at this point, but perhaps Alethi predisposed towards Radiant-ness have an innate resistance?

(We never read of Kaladin feeling the Thrill.)

OOOP, THERE IT IS.

I would like to rage.

Bloody as it may be, the thought of young!Dalinar spinning with his poleaxe like a dancer is viscerally satisfying on some deep level.

“I just go where he points me.” Dalinar confirmed for guided tactical missile.

And there's the arrow, and Dalinar is impressed. Nearly gets shot again with just how impressed he is. (Now's not the time for competency-kink to kick in, buddy.)

Dalinar. Dalinar, anyone else would call this a bad idea.

“He's got a hole through his chest. Tough break.” Dalinar please.

….Sadeas had golden Shardplate. Sadeas had golden Shardplate. I suppose this must be before he picked his colours as Highprince, and I am entirely unsurprised that he'd go that showboat-y. Was he forced to give up the gold at some point? Is that why his Plate during the current timeline was painted red as opposed to Elhokar's golden set?

“Oh Dalinar. What would we do without you?” Sadeas, I'm afraid your flirting isn't going to work on this one.

Chapter Analysis: young!Dalinar classed straight Barbarian. WIS for dump stat.

Chapter Four – Oaths

[squints at the pre-chapter quote] Theory that the book Oathbringer in-universe is Dalinar's biography is rapidly declining. Still possible, though.

THE EVERSTORM RETURNS.

!!!! He's feeling the Stormfather's emotions? The soulbond can transfer emotions between spren and Radiant and vice versa? Be still my heart.

Stormfather is bascially a cat, ignoring Dalinar just because he doesn't want to come when called, confirmed.

SNUGGLES

Not only snuggles but bared safehand aaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh- I love how that's more a sign of trust and intimate familiarity than anything inherently sexual.

The Everstorm is at least slower than a highstorm, but that's not a whole lot of reassurance. “It wouldn't tear down cities, but it did rain destruction upon them – and the winds would attack in bursts, hostile, even deliberate.” Yeaaaah, definitely not. How powerful can those “deliberate” gusts be, I wonder?

Gavilar was your control back then, wasn't he? External control, rather then the internal discipline you keep now.

You want to- you want to get married before you let yourself 'get seduced'. I mean, that's entirely fitting with the Vorin religion and the Alethi in particular being so focused on oaths, but damn, man. I thought you two were already quietly together.

INFORMATION ABOUT SHSHSHSH GIVE IT TO ME GIVE IT TO M-

….shit. You're telling Navani about the lack of memory. Hoooooly shit.

Hostage? Hostage?!

I am abruptly SO MUCH more concerned for Adolin and Renarin, Adolin was only thirteen and Renarin even younger I thought she'd fallen ill or something but a hostage situation can you imagine how that impacted the boys, how that must have scarred them to the core – during their formative years! I- fuck. This is going to get some serious attention on the RP blog after I've finished Oathbringer.

The thought of Elhokar faced with Dalinar and Navani's wedding vows is partly so hilarious that I almost want it to happen, but on the other hand I feel he'd spontaneously combust with sheer embarrassment and I probably would too.

Dalinar you lunatic.

….still stuck on hostage situati-

'silk-covered virgin' – does that mean that the Alethi traditionally get married in silk clothing? I'm imagining the men in a vest-and-takama set, the women in something light and flowing. There's no way that Dalinar isn't in his uniform right now though.

True spren versus subspren? What would constitute a subspren? Is that akin to the difference between honorspren and windspren, or is there a further level of spren that we haven't seen yet?

What do your sons think of this, Dalinar? They who remember their mother? I don't think they're opposed to you remarrying – on the contrary, they'd want you to be happy, but… what do they think?

BRIDAL CROWN. I NEED TO ART THIS ASAP.

Red is lucky, making a note of that.

“A lady must be prepared.” Oh hush, you planned for this to happen.

This. Is not going to make Elhokar feel any less like he's being ousted as king. This will undermine his confidence in his position even further, which is not good when King Social Anxiety is already pretty much at rock bottom and recuperating from an assassination attempt.

The face of the storm itself opening up overhead, the world hanging on a suspended breath… I'm getting shivers, no wonder the crowd exploded with awespren!

OH GOOD YOUR BOYS ARE THRILLED. Grinning! And joy! And, despite the Alethi not being big on contact, hugs. Adolin you touch-starved nerd

Oooof. That is pretty heretical, Dalinar, you have to admit that. Even atheists like Jasnah are probably less 'heretical' in the eyes of Vorinism than someone 'faithful' proclaiming that God Is Dead. In this time when your goal is unity, this isn't going to help you in the slightest.

[looks at map of Alethkar at the end of the chapter] [looks up]

Why. The everloving fuck. Is there no scale for distance. THIS IS A BASIC PART OF MAPMAKING. I WILL COME OVER THERE AND BEAT IT INTO YOUR HEADS-

...still stuck on hostage situation and I’m apparently not getting over it anytime soon

[safestsephiroth]

unnecessary whining below

Anxiety’s stupid. Both in that it’s unpleasant and that the intrusive ideas it brings with it are idiotic and make no sense and yet there they are, as strong as anything else.

when I saw how fun Samurai was, and that it was actually really good, I was ecstatic.

For RP reasons, months ago I’d already set up that I have to level it multiple times, like as not to 70 - [soon-to-be-revealed secret character] being top priority, sure, but then there’s also Rydia, Grey, and likely Jaraku at the bare minimum, as well. (Because Jaraku picks up every fad and promptly throws them away when they’re hard, or finds some bullshit workaround to doing their shit. Like his Wal-Mart Monk-ness.)

I really like Samurai, and when I saw what they did to Summoner I needed that feeling. I needed the feeling there was a job I liked playing I wasn’t going to get shit on for playing - it’s a bit complicated but I’ve been keeping up with the rotations just fine so far. I needed the feeling it was good, I really do feel a bit hurt because SMN was my favorite heavensward job.

But there’s no way they won’t nerf Samurai. When people I know to be level-headed and reasonable in basically all things are calling for a samurai nerf, the days are numbered. And I’m terrified they’re going to nerf Samurai into the fucking dirt and if I ever try to do savage content I’ll be completely useless. What I want is for them to buff all the other jobs to bring them to that level, because those big-ass numbers feel GOOD, doing rotations that way feels GOOD. Samurai feels GOOD. And I want every job to feel good to play.

But logically? That’s ABSOLUTELY not going to happen.

And I’ve had really bad anxiety because of queue times. I didn’t realize how much I was relying on the ability to switch characters at will to keep going - do two roulettes, do some beast tribe quests, call it a day on that character, rinse repeat eight times.

Now I can’t. Now queue times are so bad I spent four hours logging in earlier and made it through half the queue. I know they’ll get better, I do - but I feel like I’m on a serious time crunch. I don’t totally understand why. But I want to do it nownownownownow.

Feels a bit childish, really.

I don’t understand how new monk’s going to work at all (mechanics wise, not viability - ultimately that’s far less an issue in my opinion) - but wait, I know a few, I’ll ask them, that problem’s solved - and new dark knight seems hard to understand to me. I never understood 60 DRG so that’s nothing new, but Bard is really complex now too, it looks like.

There’s so much information to take in.

I want summoner to be good. I want Samurai to be good. I think the thing with Samurai is that they designed it for extremely high-end content, where their complete and total lack of party support utility becomes an actual problem, but for the overwhelming majority of players that content isn’t actually relevant. It was a problem I always ran into on bard - if I wasn’t doing Alex or Mhachi shit, I pretty much never had to sing mage’s ballad or army’s paeon unless someone fucked up and died. So my usefulness hinged on fuckups from other people, and in a good team I had very little to do. That’s not good. (The way they reworked bard and machinist for that was Very Good in my eyes.) So in regular content, it doesn’t matter that much, but if samurai had the same damage output as monk or dragoon they’d be completely fucking worthless in hard shit.

And I hate that I have to do savage shit now because it has its own story. I don’t like doing ultra-hard stuff because it’s only doable with a static and I hate joining statics as a concept for me personally because it takes the fun game and makes it a job and breaks up friendships and I don’t like that. Doing 24-mans or Alex stuff felt more like an “everyone’s here suffering together” vibe but trying to do EX primals when they were semi-relevant was horrible.

I’m getting these really REALLY strong periods of anxiety where I’m convinced the free companies I’m in are sick of me and want me gone. I’m trying to be helpful to people and be nice and it doesn’t assuage the fears. I know it’s likely bullshit but what if it isn’t so like I shouldn’t be this torn up by it.

It’s felt almost impossible to get RPs going (this is in a big way my fault for flaking out on people, I recognize this), but especially with new people, for months now. I feel frustrated because the amount of characters I can feasibly RP outside niche groups for specific plotlines feels like it’s shrinking, and I worked so hard on these characters but I feel half like a stranger sometimes.

And I know it’s all my fault this happened. I’m the one who flaked out of a big plotline in my first FC and elected not to participate in the one prior or after. I’m the one who pushed characters into my other FC with no idea how to make them fit. I’m the one who disappeared and stopped approaching people directly for so long, and it’s ultimately my fault that there are multiple characters in RISK I don’t recognize - I always took for granted I’d know who everyone was and who played them but there’s at least six characters now I could barely tell you anything about other than their race.

I should be writing so many more drabbles. I can’t expect people to know my characterrs when I don’t write anything.

And I really liked PVP. I really, really did. It was a lot of fun. And it’s not, now. At all. Now I hate it. I hate it so goddamned much. Everything about it, every change they made sucks. But I hear very few people say bad things about it, so it’s sure as shit staying this way.

Queue popped.