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astaroth1357 · 4 years

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I love reading your how to guide they're fun to read and I was wondering if you do a how to be the brother's sugar mama 🤣

So I'm not going to lie, I'm pretty sure Lucifer would let you be his Sugar Mama over his actual dead body so... I did a Sugar Baby instead. If you really want me to write the Sugar Mama, message me and I wiiilllll but I think it’s more of a stretch then I was comfortable taking otherwise. But if we're doing this at all, we're going to have to do it NSFW people. It’s going to be sort of unavoidable either way, so strap in cause I sure did.

How to be a Demon's Sugar Baby

Make the Most of Your Bartered Soul!

Well, well, well this is quite the arrangement you've made with the forces of Hell now, isn't it? There's nothing wrong with expecting a full return on your investment since you did give away your soul for this so it's time to enjoy that compensation! While we're sure that you're ready to be spoiled rotten by your beloved demon, there are going to be certain things expected of you in order to keep that affection flowing. In our guide, How to be a Demon's Sugar Baby, we will give you insight into what kind of actions you should expect to perform as well as the benefits you can receive when you start pampering your dearest demon! Always remember, love isn't material, but having good stuff is really nice regardless!

ATTENTION: This guide contains material not suitable for all workplaces. Reader's discretion advised.

Lucifer

What a wonderful selection for this kind of relationship because this demon is loaded! You need not worry about asking for too much. Whatever your heart's desire, Lucifer can provide.

HOWEVER… He's not a very generous demon. Every cent that he gives you, you will have to earn. The man isn't in the business of giving handouts, even to cuties like yourself.

Lucifer can be a demanding Sugar Daddy for sure. He will expect you to be ready for him at the drop of a hat. One text, one call, even a passing mention of your name, and you should be there. No questions asked or you will be punished.

It pays to be astute with Lucifer, too. If you're good, then he shouldn't even have to command you. One step in the room and you should know just what to do and how he's going to want it. Though remember, even if he doesn't say much, he's in control here.

There will be times where he's not looking for a little release and just needs some relaxation. You'll, of course, be expected to provide for that too: back rubs, tea, and pleasant conversation are all options you should get acquainted with very quickly.

Understand this now, anything short of perfection is not tolerated. If he's taking you anywhere, you're going to have to look/be amazing Every. Time. He'll make sure you'll have everything for it, but there's going to be no slacking off with him. Ever.

If you're looking to satisfy Lucifer, you won't just be a side piece or arm candy. You will be a trophy and he will spoil you like one.

Mammon

So maybe you don't like your Sugar Daddy with a lot of cash, but just the inability to say "no" to you in nearly any capacity…? Then Mammon's is your perfect pick!

True, it may not be wise to choose a Sugar Daddy who seems chronically without sugar to give but if there's any gambler in you then Mammon can be a near constant rush.

His highs are your highs, if he's out gambling then he'll want you on his arm or in his lap for good luck. Cheer him on and sprinkle in a bit of teasing because he's positive he makes better bets when he feels on top of the world.

If he makes a killing, then it's an all night celebration. He may even cover you in the Grimm just to enjoy how it looks. You won't stay like that very long though, because he'll need to have his way with you quite a few times before the sun comes up.

Don't fret, most of that money that he makes is going to go towards you anyway. You won't have to worry about him putting his bills over his Sugar (even if it's ill-advised).

Do remember that Mammon is a cheapskate at heart, but you shouldn't have any trouble bypassing that if there's something you want. Flash him some big, watery eyes and he'll cave every time until he goes broke again...

And then his lows are your lows… But if you still show him kindness and compassion even when he's flat broke, we guarantee he will never leave your side.

Leviathan

Are you an otaku/gamer/geek who wants copious amounts of that sweet, sweet merch and a little love on the side? Then you also want Levi.

Just know that this demon is desperate for love in his life so you'll be busy on most days. Levi needs to be lavished in attention: cuddles, pets, kisses, and probably more sex than you can process. He's veeery pent up...

Thankfully, he stays in his room all the time so you can do whatever you like away from prying eyes! Which is good, because he tends to get adventurous when he's confident. There won't be a spot in his room you two have not been before.

Like Mammon, Levi's going to need a cheerleader as much as he does a lover. Nothing is quite like starting a competitive match with someone very vocally in your corner.

We do hope you like anime, video games, or general geekry because he won't tolerate indifference. You need not have memorized the entirety of the TSL Extended Compendium, but you should at least be able to identify his favorite characters or scenes in anything he watches. You won't last long otherwise.

If you can then consider the entirety of Akuzon's wares to be yours. You'll only need to ask. If there's any particular series that you enjoy, expect its merch to be gifted to you whenever he sees it. He'll have very little self-control (especially if it's all for you).

Truthfully, we have no idea where Levi gets his money so just don’t question how he keeps buying you so many things... It's probably some shady cryptocurrency or black market type stuff so we recommend you stay out of his finances, lest you learn something you regret...

Satan

Ah, an intellectual are you? Not satisfied with just a fancy new car or a designer handbag? Do you need the very best that the world has to offer? The most beautiful, artistic, and thought-provoking goods you can find?? Then really your only choice is Satan.

… But do you like pets? We sincerely hope you like pets…

In truth, Satan will want two things from you: some stimulating conversation and a little pet play.

This is very much a "gentleman by day" arrangement. He'll be sure to treat you to very nice things all the time: wine tastings, art shows, even red carpet events thanks to his connections.

He won't mind taking you anywhere as long as you can engage that brain of his. Abstract conversations or discussions about hard topics will earn you even better trips the next time around...

But "by night" you will have a nickname, a collar, and probably a tail plug too. This man is bound and determined to have a cat and he does not care how.

If the idea of crawling for him makes you want to save face then don't worry. You needn't be an obedient kitty, not even for him.

In fact, he'd much prefer you act out from time to time because if there's one thing he likes more than cats, it's brats. Be cute for him and maybe he'll go easy on you if you like.

Asmodeus��

Do you like shopping? Just, the act of shopping in general? Do you want someone who won't just sign a check but shop with you? Asmo's the man.

He loves shopping and he loves shopping for you! He won't just stand outside the dressing room on his phone, he'll be a very active participant in making you happy.

A veeerrry active participant… Everywhere… Probably including that dressing room…

You need to understand now that Asmo is insatiable. Whatever you believe a high sex drive is, double it and then you will get Asmo on a Tuesday.

He's giving. Very giving in fact, in money and in bed, but that won't change that he is a monster. His stamina is unreal, his desire is unmatched, and assuming that you are not an incarnation of Aphrodite herself You. Will. Not. Keep. Up.

If you choose to be with Asmo it will be a hellish bliss. You will be pampered like royalty on a sea of euphoria until the tide overtakes you and you drown.

If this warning isn't enough to dissuade you, we wish you the best of luck. Asmo may bring you to the greatest highs of your life, but he very much can be the death of you too...

Beelzebub

You know, food can be expensive. Especially if you have a bit of an appetite… If an endless food supply is what you're after, then you need Beel in your life!

He'll always be down to go out and try new foods or take you to whatever restaurant you like (provided he's eating there too, of course).

Considering the amount that he eats there's no way you can top his bill so order as much as you like! You'll get through what? Four? Five courses? He'll get cut off around 12.

Restaurants aside, food will be mostly what Beel expects from you so we do hope you like cooking. Cuddles and kisses are well and good but this demon needs to eat.

Speaking of which… Truthfully, being with Beel is almost just like a normal relationship but there's just one catch….

Beel is practically an oral addict. He will want to get a taste of you and once he does you ought to resign yourself to being his new fix.

A session with Beel is not for the faint of heart. He can be down there for hours and won't stop even if you're a drooling, overstimulated wreck. His aftercare is sweet but it's a hell of a journey getting there. Be warned.

Belphegor

So maybe all these other options just sound like too much work... You want a Sugar Daddy, but someone who's on the laidback side, right? Introducing Belphegor.

Belphie is a man of simple pleasures. A quiet afternoon, a long nap, and maybe a game or some mischief in the middle of the night. You won't have to worry about doing very much because he won't be conscious very long...

He will, however, get his money's worth in the hours that he's awake.

Belphegor is a lazy soul, so don't expect him to put much work into things. His favorite tactic will be to get you so frustrated that you jump him. Then he can just sit back and enjoy the fun with a smug smile on his face…

If you're not riding him in some way then you're probably going to be his new pillow. He will find a way to sleep on you in every position possible until he finds a favorite and just sticks to that.

As far as what he offers, Belphie will pretty much just toss money in your direction and leave it up to you to spend it. He’s not a shopping man...

In the rare cases that he does go out and buy you a gift take it as a compliment. You’ve motivated him to leave the House for longer than twenty minutes so you must be exactly what he was after.

For more of my “How Tos...” check out my Masterlist!

#obey me #obey me shall we date #shall-we-date-obey-me #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me headcanons #obey me hc

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wolfpawn · 4 years

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I Hate You, I Love You, Chapter 166

Chapter Summary -Tom and Danielle go to Ireland to see about booking the venue, while there, Tom realises something that makes him see that this actually matters a lot more to Danielle than he thought.

Previous Chapter

Rating - Mature (some chapters contain smut)

Triggers - references to Tom Hiddleston’s work with the #MeToo Movement. That chapter will be tagged accordingly.

authors Note - I have been working on this for the last 3 years, it is currently 180+ chapters long. This will be updated daily, so long as I can get time to do so, obviously.

NOTES -

Aoife is pronounced E-Fa MacDaragh is pronounced Mac-Dar-ah

Look, I like the idea of taking your husband's name, it's traditional, so to me, it's nice. I totally respect any woman that keeps hers, that's her business, but I like it, personally, and for this, so does Danielle.

tags: @sweetkingdomstarlight-blog @jessibelle-nerdy-mum @nonsensicalobsessions @damalseer @hiddlesbitch1 @winterisakiller @fairlightswiftly @salempoe @wolfsmom1 @black-ninja-blade

Tom and Danielle looked at the building in front of them. The fact it was wintery, wet and cold, with plants and trees bare of leaves did not give the best idea of what the place would look like in the summer but it did allow them to see what they were looking at. It was secluded and picturesque, everything they could want location wise.

“Are you happy with it?” Tom asked, looking at the walled garden behind them.

“It’s very beautiful.”

“That’s not what I asked, Elle.”

“I am just anxious to see what we are dealing with.”

“Elle, I know I have said this, ad nauseam but I mean it, when we talk about if we want to book this, I do not want the cost to be the sole reason you say no, I want this to be perfect for us.”

“So if they said something like eighty grand, you’re okay with that?” She challenged.

“Obviously not, but you know that’s not what I mean.”

“No,” she conceded. “I just think it’s all a bit mad.”

“Why? We have the money.”

“I rather we spend the money on a bigger house if you’re adamant to spend it at all.”

“I am curious, how much did your parents leave you to say you are so money conscious.”

“I paid for my house outright and still had enough to move everything over, set myself up over in Britain and have a rainy day fund. Dad’s practise wasn’t worth too much, you saw it, it's small, more an office than anything and our house was small, so it wasn’t too much either. But it got me a three-bed in Suffolk, so…” She shrugged.

“I never asked but why a three-bed? You didn’t seem interested in having a family when you came over.”

“I didn’t, I was only twenty-five but I was thinking if I did, it would be a solid investment, or even if I didn’t, it’s a lot easier to sell a bigger house these days.”

“You are so sensible.”

“Too sensible for this,” She laughed. “Maybe that’s why I was never gone on marriage, the waste of money.”

“Is that how you feel still?” Tom looked at her worried. “Why did you say yes?”

“I want to marry you,” Danielle stated immediately, Tom said nothing whilst waiting for her to make explain what she meant. “I didn’t say that right, what I meant to say was perhaps that’s why marriage was never something overly appealing to me before, the dislike of the financial part of it. I always thought it to be an unnecessarily expensive endeavour; I still do, as you can see but I do want to be married to you. I just don’t want to spend twenty thousand euro doing it.”

“Why did you pick that number?”

“The average cost of a wedding in Ireland is twenty-one thousand euro.” She informed him.

“Can you imagine how cheap and expensive some people make their day?”

“Well, Ashford castle is about an hour from here and that’s actually one of the most expensive locations to get married in the country, so…”

“Where?”

“It’s where Rory McIlroy and Pierce Brosnan both got married, very exclusive,” Danielle commented, not paying too much heed to him until she realised Tom was on his phone. “What are you doing?”

“Checking something.”

“Tom...don't even think about it.”

“I am just looking.”

“Tom!”

“Which is closer the church?” Danielle said nothing. “Elle…”

“No, we are not considering it. I don’t even know why we are considering this, this is all crazy.”

“I just want it all to be incredible, so when I am ringing you from a set saying reshoots are going to be another few days and miss that party we had planned, you can remember I am not actually a bad husband.” He explained as they walked towards the front door of the abbey as the rain began to fall again.

Danielle rolled her eyes as she listened to him. “I don’t need a fancy wedding venue for that.”

“I know, but it may help.” Tom held the door for her as they walked inside.

As soon as they did, it appeared that the manager was eagerly waiting for them and rushed over to them, a woman behind him with a file of some manner with her. “Mr Hiddleston, Ms Hughes, how wonderful to meet you, I am MacDaragh Canty, I am the manager here and this is Aoife Zeigler, our events coordinator.” He introduced them. “We are so honoured you have considered us for your wedding.”

“Thank you.” Tom smiled, shaking the man’s hand. “Elle was saying this place was beautiful but I have to admit, I think she sold you short.”

“Thank you. We try to keep it looking well. I will allow Aoife to take you around and discuss different aspects of the building with you, she is very knowledgeable on the building and grounds and has practically every name of note that you could want from florists to chocolatiers regarding a function to hand and if you wish to discuss anything with me, please, do not hesitate to ask and I will be at your service.”

“Thank you,” Tom repeated before looking to the woman in front of them who had yet to speak as the man walked away to deal with another matter.

“Follow me please.” She ushered them to the edge of the foyer and began to discuss the different manners in which guests would be welcomed and other such things as she walked through the building with them.

For the most of an hour, Aoife went through everything with them, talking about extra security measures they could put in place, all things considered. After it all, they sat and discussed the cost of everything. More than once, Tom felt Danielle’s shock beside him, knowing she did not want to pay so much for the day but he rubbed her hand slightly to have her remember that this was not an issue for them.

“And would you be getting married at the church here?” Aoife asked.

“No, my parish one, it’s halfway between here and Galway.”

“Right, so you are talking an arrival time of about four then, or do you want the pictures here?”

“More than likely here.”

“Okay, well, we can take all that into account, we also need to make note of dietary needs. Any allergens?”

“Gluten sensitivity, dairy sensitivity, a few vegetarians and two vegans are the major ones.”

“Okay, so if we make the meals for all of the vegetarians vegan, we can ensure the meal is satisfactory for all of them, as regards the sensitivities, we will treat them as allergies and keep their food separate, the best thing to do would be to prepare them near but not next to the vegan food, for obvious reasons.”

“Thank you.” Danielle smiled.

“So, do you want to make a reservation now or think it over?”

“We would actually like to take the night to consider it.” Tom declared. Internally, Danielle frowned but did not let it show for fear that it would force Tom to say something aloud he did not wish to discuss. “We are staying nearby so we can sort the deposit tomorrow if required.”

“Perfect, thank you very much for your considering us. I am the only one to have the dates you discussed with us, so do not worry about it becoming public knowledge, I understand that these things are a concern for you both but we will not permit that information to become public knowledge.”

“Thank you, we appreciate that.” Danielle smiled.

They walked to the car and said nothing to one another as they got in, Danielle startled that Tom took the driver’s side, but she sat into the passenger side and watched as Tom chuckled as he pulled the driver’s seat back so he could actually get into the car properly. “So...is there a reason you are not booking?”

“Yes, the fact you are speaking about me saying yes and not us.”

“I just don’t know.”

“What don’t you feel is right?”

“I am not sure.”

“Talk to me.”

“I don’t know. I just am not blown away by it.”

“Okay, well, that’s why we’re here. We’ll get something that you do actually want,” Tom commented as he drove out the gate

“It’s not all about me.”

“No, there are two of us in it but I don’t want to say yes to somewhere, pay a considerable sum of money and for you to look back at not have the biggest smile possible at the thought of the day. I like it but if you don’t.”

“Tom, we could get married in a registry office in London, Cork, Galway, fuck even Ballinasloe and I would be happy, as long as I get to call you my husband at the end of it. I would get married today, in these clothes, half wet and no make-up just to be married to you, it’s not the place or the cost, it’s the fact that in twenty years time, when I have long fucking forgotten what we even ate at the wedding, that I get to see the band on my finger and remember that it is there because I am married to you, that is what matters. When some post comes through the door saying ‘Danielle Hiddleston’ or when people call us Mr and Mrs Hiddleston and it’s not an error, that’s what I want. I don’t care about a venue in the grand scheme of things. That’s not what we are doing this for. I don’t care about the wedding, I care about having a good marriage to the man I love who will call me to tell me he is stuck doing reshoots for a few more days so I have to go to a party by myself and when I roll my eyes, I wonder why I married him in the first place, that is all that matters.” She explained.

Tom stared at her wide-eyed, processing everything before one part of it stuck out above everything else, causing him to pull in for a moment. “Danielle Hiddleston? You would take my name?”

“Yes, why?” In everything, she had not thought that something to focus on.

“You...really?”

“Yes,” She nodded, thinking it an odd thing to say before looking at him. “Would you want me not to?”

“I never thought you would want to.”

“Why wouldn’t I take my husband’s name?”

“Well, you’re a very independent woman, you are getting your name for your work, changing it because of getting married and with how other women keep their name for that reason.”

“Well, that’s their choice, I would like to take yours. I always liked the way families are traced through it and if we have kids, I rather have the same surname as them and their father.”

Tom said nothing in return, he simply leant over and kissed her with as much passion as he could muster at her declaration.

#I Hate You I Love You #Chapter 166 #Tom Hiddleston #Tom Hiddleston Fic #wolfpawn

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louisdwilliams · 4 years

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Heavy Adults, here are 5 electric scooters for you

Scooters provide both a practical and entertaining method of transportation over short distances and are great for all sorts of applications. On campus, sidewalks, or general transportation, they’re an alternative to walking or biking. It’s great if you’d like to get across short distances in style, or, ease the strain on your legs and joints.

Best electric scooter for heavy adults 2020

Map of contents

TOP 5 Electric Scooters for heavy adults

5. Swagger 5 T

4. Glion Dolly

3. Segway Ninebot MAX

2. QIEWA Q1Hummer

1. Outstorm Ultra

Electric scooters come in various shapes and types. For this article, we’re going over the five best current scooters suited for heavy adults. It’s common to experience strain during movement, but an electric scooter can ease this for those dealing with extreme joint pain (or similar). We’ll focus on a variety of factors, ranging from speed, price, total load, and more.

Worth noting, the scooters we cover will mix between standing and sitting.

What is the Best Electric Scooter for Heavy Adults?

Now, let’s dive into our selections. Economics is the idea behind this selection. Some scooters can easily escalate well beyond the $1K mark, so this is suited for heavy set adults that fit the limit but also want something that’s accessible for short travel. Good for commuting in cities too where walking isn’t exactly practical, but traveling by car isn’t either (at least considering the cost of gas).

Table: 5 Electric scooters for heavy adults

coming soon

5. Swagger 5 T

Starting with a recommendation you may enjoy, the Swagger 5T has all the standard features of an electric scooter with a few additions to make it better. It has a sufficient carrying capacity of up to 320 lbs and works great for adults and the elderly.

Portable and foldable, meaning its light enough to be carried anywhere but doesn’t skip out on its ability to move at practical speeds or carry the user. Price-wise it’s affordable too, with variants starting at $300 USD and typically not exceeding that mark.

See the best offer from: Amazon

Specs Overview

Battery charge time is 3.5 hours for a maximum of 6-11 miles of total travel in between charges

250w motor

Lightweight aluminum frame for support individuals of up to 320 pounds

Foldable design for transportation with speeds of up to 18mph

Integrated app which creates additional security features such as distance tracking, electric locking, and customer support

We like this as an alternative choice to the Glion Dolly as they’re both affordable options capable of supporting heavy adults for short-distance travel. It’s another option for commuting or joint support and works well if it’s impractical to walk. The integrated app is also a great touch and adds some nice support and security features.

Pros

Inexpensive and a great starter model for adults and elderly

Easy to carry around and lightweight thanks to its aluminum frame

Good weight support and decent travel distance

Cons

Slow on steep inclines greater than 20 degrees

Doesn’t have the fastest speed or longest battery lifetime

4. Glion Dolly

Our 4th option sits at a more affordable price tier and is a good entry model for heavy set adults. It doesn’t come with as many specifications but perfectly suitable for practical travel uses. One of its major advantages is the lightweight design, meaning its easy to carry and transport.

See the best offer from: Amazon

Specs Overview

Lithium-ion battery for up to 15mph of travel speed and 15 miles of distance crossed before recharge

Maximum rider carry weight of up to 255 lbs

250-watt battery with a charge time of 2-3.5 hours

Fork suspension for easy turning

While it doesn’t sport as many features as our initial listing, it’s got enough to work for casual users and heavier adults.

Pros

Lightweight, ergonomic, and easy to transport

Affordable price tier for entry users or those who just need a scooter option starting around the $400 USD mark

Easy to use and safe traveling speed

Cons

While a good entry-choice, features are fairly basic and overall design means the carrying capacity has limits

Best used for economy travel with limited distance capacity

Works best in standard sidewalk applications and not suited for offroad use

3. Segway Ninebot MAX

Our last pick is another optimal mid-tier scooter hitting plenty of sweet spots for both travel and carrying capacity. If you’re not satisfied with our previous listings, this option might be the right one for you. Backed by a 1 year warranty, it’s a reliable choice and good middle ground between speed and performance.

See the best offer from: Amazon

Specs Overview

70 lbs frame weight with a total carry capacity of up to 220 lbs

Reaches speeds up to 18mph

At full charge can cross distances of up to 40 miles

Dual motor system utilizing Ah battery requiring only 3 hours of charge time

LED lights for evening travel

LCD display detailing drive speeds and other critical information

With an integrated display and some impressive speed and lifetime specs, this is an ideal choice hitting several sweet spots: speed, distance, and weight capacity.

Pros

Nice, short charge time with long distance per charge

LED display to get information about your travel

1 year warranty when purchased from manufacturer backed by customer support

Good speed for fast travel

Cons

Maximum carry capacity could be better

Weights 42lbg

2. QIEWA Q1Hummer

The next option is a high performance model great for enthusiasts and heavier adults. Its hardware and design not only allow it to hold a carry capacity of up to 550 lbs, but also reach speeds over 30mph. According to the manufacturer, it offers great customer support and performs well on inclines of up to 35 degrees.

See the best offer from: Amazon

Specs Overview

800w electric easy-recharge motor for speeds up to 50kmh (35mph)

Model is designed to be waterproof and sports foldable design

Installed with an anti-theft system

Rider support of weights up to 550 lbs

Incline travel of up to 35 degrees

What we really like to see are scooters that can carry heavier adults but don’t skip on the hardware, such as this one. The performance capabilities here are quite impressive, though, something like this does come at a higher price tier than our previous choices.

Pros

Powerful, long-lasting scooter with great customer support options and durable frame

Anti-theft installed buzzer for safer parking

Great speed and travels long distances before needed a recharge with shock-absorption

High weight capacity

Totals a travel distance of 68miles/100kmh before needing recharge

Cons

Heavy frame, averaging around 50 lbs meaning it can be difficult to transport

Higher price tier which typically exceeds around $1k depending on the vendor

Alternatively, you can look for the QIEWA Qpower for an electric scooter with a 660 carrying capacity.

1. Outstorm Ultra – the best electric scooter for heavy adults

Our first choice arrives with an arsenal of powerful features suited for enthusiasts and those who need a scooter. It’s durable, maintains a long battery life, and boasts an impressive top speed to boot. It’s also great for heavy set adults who want to enjoy high performance without sacrificing practicality.

See the best offer from: Amazon

Specs Overview

Total battery charge equates to 9 hours equating to roughly 65 miles of distance

Can reach a top speed of 56 MPH utilizing an electric charge

Durable and rugged terrain frame/tire system is perfect for on/off-road applications

LED lights for night travel

3200-watt motor

Foldable and ergonomic design allows for easy transportation

Shock absorption system for smooth travel along with a total carrying capacity of 320 lbs.

As you can see, the Outstorm is feature fit with specifications that work for a variety of uses and needs, even for heavier adults.

Pros

Great topspeed and durable tire system for any terrain

Foldable and easy to transport

Multiple variants (such as scooters with 5000-watt motors)

Good for casual use but also for heavier adults

Cons

Price point, heavy investment and costs typically start around $2000 mark

Does come with a seat option though may not be comfortable for some

While loaded with great features, not ideal for those who need a simple alternative to travel at an affordable price tier

Why get an electric scooter?

Beyond utilizing an electric scooter for joint support, there are a variety of reasons an adult can use a scooter in their day to day life. Scooters are an alternative to typical travel, especially if you don’t have access to a bike (or the area you live in doesn’t support bicycle travel).

It’s faster than walking

Unsurprisingly, an electric scooter is much faster than walking and can get from place to place in half the time. For those that want to get from location to location at an expedited pace, a scooter works well without the need for a vehicle or bicycle. It could range from going to the store to quickly pick up something for dinner, stepping out to eat, taking a casual ride, or any instance where walking is too slow and you’d rather not waste gas. Speaking of…

It’s eco-friendly and saves you money

An electric scooter is precisely that: electric. Modern scooters take advantage of lithium-ion batteries which is a roundabout way of saying they don’t require gas to operate. So, even though it’s a motorized device, you won’t need gas and therefore won’t create additional carbon emissions like you would with a car. Therefore, when you want to get around without the need for a car, you’re helping the environment whether you intended to or not.

Because electric scooters don’t require fuel, you won’t need to spend money on gas either. Scooters can hold charges for several hours, even when not in use. Less gas used means less need to refuel your vehicle, translating to some spare change in saved cash. These days, who doesn’t need the extra dollar or two?

It helps reduce joint pain

Mentioned several times, it’s a great point worth repeating. Heavier adults and elderly are susceptible to joint pain and potentially ligament damage for a variety of health reasons. But, just like everyone, they need to get around, and that’s where electric scooters can help. It isn’t to suggest ligament pain shouldn’t be observed by a medical professional, but reducing strain on the body is an important health factor to consider, and this is where electric scooters provide a benefit.

Is this the best electric scooter for heavy adults?

Pros of Getting an Electric Scooter

Here’s a breakdown of some of the other pros when purchasing an electric scooter.

Easy to use

There is a learning curve, but electric scooters are designed for easy use. You won’t have to spend extra time knowing how to “drive” one as you would with other motorized vehicles.

Few license requirements

It’s unlikely you’ll need a license requirement to operate an electric scooter. Though this depends on the area, an alternative vehicle normally has special license requirements, where electric scooters do not.

Reduced or no maintenance costs

Electric scooters are ready to go without limited or no assembly needed, meaning they’re also free from maintenance hurdles associated with other motor vehicles. That means you won’t have to worry about constantly purchasing and replacing new parts to keep your scooter in normal operating condition.

Electric

We’ve mentioned it several times, but it really bears worth repeating. Electric vehicles are a huge time and money saver and even charging them is inexpensive, versus fuelling them. And, as you know, they produce no emissions.

Portable

While yes, some of our choices and other scooter models can certainly be heavy, that’s not the case for most models. This means electric scooters are easy to transport. Their foldable design allows for easy transportation.

Limited assembly

Aside from instances where installation of certain parts is necessary, electric scooters don’t require any complicated assembly.

Cons of Getting an Electric Scooter

There aren’t many, but there are some factors worth considering before getting an electric scooter.

Price

Even the scooters at the lowest price tier of our list still run up several hundred dollars. No matter how you slice it, it’s a good chunk of cash, while the higher-tier variants can break the one-thousand mark. No matter what, an electric scooter is an investment.

Some maintenance

No, you won’t have to be an expert mechanic, but here and there electric scooters do require a level of maintenance. Typically it involves part replacement after said parts need changing due to use. It’s not the worst thing, but something to consider.

Conclusion

Electric scooters provide a convenient and inexpensive way to travel short or long distances, depending on the needs of the rider. Our list fits different price tiers, needs, and models to hopefully pin down the best unit for you. Naturally, what you select will greatly vary based on your environment, personal weight, and other factors.

You can visit our website for additional selections and options.

The post Heavy Adults, here are 5 electric scooters for you appeared first on ELSkateboards.

Heavy Adults, here are 5 electric scooters for you published first on https://elskateboards.tumblr.com

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elskateboards · 4 years

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Heavy Adults, here are 5 electric scooters for you

Best electric scooter for heavy adults 2020

Map of contents

TOP 5 Electric Scooters for heavy adults

5. Swagger 5 T

4. Glion Dolly

3. Segway Ninebot MAX

2. QIEWA Q1Hummer

1. Outstorm Ultra

Worth noting, the scooters we cover will mix between standing and sitting.

What is the Best Electric Scooter for Heavy Adults?

Table: 5 Electric scooters for heavy adults

coming soon

5. Swagger 5 T

See the best offer from: Amazon

Specs Overview

Battery charge time is 3.5 hours for a maximum of 6-11 miles of total travel in between charges

250w motor

Lightweight aluminum frame for support individuals of up to 320 pounds

Foldable design for transportation with speeds of up to 18mph

Integrated app which creates additional security features such as distance tracking, electric locking, and customer support

Pros

Inexpensive and a great starter model for adults and elderly

Easy to carry around and lightweight thanks to its aluminum frame

Good weight support and decent travel distance

Cons

Slow on steep inclines greater than 20 degrees

Doesn’t have the fastest speed or longest battery lifetime

4. Glion Dolly

See the best offer from: Amazon

Specs Overview

Lithium-ion battery for up to 15mph of travel speed and 15 miles of distance crossed before recharge

Maximum rider carry weight of up to 255 lbs

250-watt battery with a charge time of 2-3.5 hours

Fork suspension for easy turning

While it doesn’t sport as many features as our initial listing, it’s got enough to work for casual users and heavier adults.

Pros

Lightweight, ergonomic, and easy to transport

Affordable price tier for entry users or those who just need a scooter option starting around the $400 USD mark

Easy to use and safe traveling speed

Cons

While a good entry-choice, features are fairly basic and overall design means the carrying capacity has limits

Best used for economy travel with limited distance capacity

Works best in standard sidewalk applications and not suited for offroad use

3. Segway Ninebot MAX

See the best offer from: Amazon

Specs Overview

70 lbs frame weight with a total carry capacity of up to 220 lbs

Reaches speeds up to 18mph

At full charge can cross distances of up to 40 miles

Dual motor system utilizing Ah battery requiring only 3 hours of charge time

LED lights for evening travel

LCD display detailing drive speeds and other critical information

With an integrated display and some impressive speed and lifetime specs, this is an ideal choice hitting several sweet spots: speed, distance, and weight capacity.

Pros

Nice, short charge time with long distance per charge

LED display to get information about your travel

1 year warranty when purchased from manufacturer backed by customer support

Good speed for fast travel

Cons

Maximum carry capacity could be better

Weights 42lbg

2. QIEWA Q1Hummer

See the best offer from: Amazon

Specs Overview

800w electric easy-recharge motor for speeds up to 50kmh (35mph)

Model is designed to be waterproof and sports foldable design

Installed with an anti-theft system

Rider support of weights up to 550 lbs

Incline travel of up to 35 degrees

Pros

Powerful, long-lasting scooter with great customer support options and durable frame

Anti-theft installed buzzer for safer parking

Great speed and travels long distances before needed a recharge with shock-absorption

High weight capacity

Totals a travel distance of 68miles/100kmh before needing recharge

Cons

Heavy frame, averaging around 50 lbs meaning it can be difficult to transport

Higher price tier which typically exceeds around $1k depending on the vendor

Alternatively, you can look for the QIEWA Qpower for an electric scooter with a 660 carrying capacity.

1. Outstorm Ultra – the best electric scooter for heavy adults

See the best offer from: Amazon

Specs Overview

Total battery charge equates to 9 hours equating to roughly 65 miles of distance

Can reach a top speed of 56 MPH utilizing an electric charge

Durable and rugged terrain frame/tire system is perfect for on/off-road applications

LED lights for night travel

3200-watt motor

Foldable and ergonomic design allows for easy transportation

Shock absorption system for smooth travel along with a total carrying capacity of 320 lbs.

As you can see, the Outstorm is feature fit with specifications that work for a variety of uses and needs, even for heavier adults.

Pros

Great topspeed and durable tire system for any terrain

Foldable and easy to transport

Multiple variants (such as scooters with 5000-watt motors)

Good for casual use but also for heavier adults

Cons

Price point, heavy investment and costs typically start around $2000 mark

Does come with a seat option though may not be comfortable for some

While loaded with great features, not ideal for those who need a simple alternative to travel at an affordable price tier

Why get an electric scooter?

It’s faster than walking

It’s eco-friendly and saves you money

It helps reduce joint pain

Is this the best electric scooter for heavy adults?

Pros of Getting an Electric Scooter

Here’s a breakdown of some of the other pros when purchasing an electric scooter.

Easy to use

There is a learning curve, but electric scooters are designed for easy use. You won’t have to spend extra time knowing how to “drive” one as you would with other motorized vehicles.

Few license requirements

Reduced or no maintenance costs

Electric

Portable

Limited assembly

Aside from instances where installation of certain parts is necessary, electric scooters don’t require any complicated assembly.

Cons of Getting an Electric Scooter

There aren’t many, but there are some factors worth considering before getting an electric scooter.

Price

Some maintenance

Conclusion

You can visit our website for additional selections and options.

The post Heavy Adults, here are 5 electric scooters for you appeared first on ELSkateboards.

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jumpsitehq · 6 years

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200 Best Sarcasm Quotes and Sarcasm Sayings & Messages

Ever wish to be honest without hurting somebody’s feelings? One perfect way to do it is through sarcasm. It’s funny and witty, brings humor into our lives but it gives the most brutal kind of honesty too. So here we collected some of awesome 99 Best Sarcasm Quotes and Sarcasm Sayings & Messages. Even some of the best life lessons we learn are from the most sarcastic quotes we read over the internet or from our dearest friends and family. Although some people find it difficult to understand the hidden meaning of our sarcastic messages, others have no problem in finding the sense of it at all. We also have a great collection of Insomnia Quotes & Angry Status.

200 Best Sarcastic Quotes

1. I’M 2% Cute & 98% Single. 2. All You Need Is Love 5M $. 3. I’M Like Monday. Nobody Likes Me. 4. True Love: I Love More Than Free Wi-Fi. 5. Your Crush + Fast Replies = Imagination. 6. I’ve Never Faked A Sarcasm In My Life. 7. Are You Free Tomorrow? No I’M Expensive. 8. I Love Education But Without Examination. 9. Avracadabra ! Nope. You’re Still A Bitch. 10. You Remind Me Of My Chinese Friend. Ug Lee 11. World Biggest Lie ” I’ll Always With You “. 12. Let’s Just Stay Friends = Never Talk Again. 13. Money Can Buy Happiness, It’s Called “Food”. 14. First Rule Of 2017 ” Never Talk About 2016 “. 15. Conjuring 2 Is For Kids. Real Men Get Married. 16. Not Everyone Likes Me But Not Everyone Matters. 17. If You Are Late, Don’t Rush You’re Already Late. 18. Sarcasm : Just One Of The Many Services I Offer. 19. If You Don’t Have Something Nice To Say, Hush It. 20. I Don’t Understand You. I Don’t Speak Assholian. 21. Always Be Yourself, Except During Job Interviews. 22. Losing Your Best Friend Is Worse Than A Break Up. 23. I Am ” Eats Ice Cream In Winter ” Type Of Person. 24. Single Bell….Single Bell….Single All The Way. 25. Life Is Full Of Fake People. Don’t Trust Blindly. 26. I Would Slap You, But That Would Be Animal Abuse. ( Sarcasm Quotes . 27. Every Year Thousand People Quit Smoking, By Dying ! 28. I’M Single Because Nobody Believes That I’M Single. 29. I Was On Diet For 30 Days & All I Lost Was 30 Days. 30. Yes, I’M Online 24X7, But I Hardly Chat With Anyone. 31. If Nobody Hates You. You Are Doing Something Boring. 32. People Get Mad When You Treat Them How They Treat You. 33. Happiness Is You And Your Best Friend Hate Same Person. 34. Sarcasm Is The Body’s Natural Defense Against Stupidity. ( Sarcasm Quotes . 35. Tip For 2017 : Don’t Get Emotionally Attached To Anyone. 36. My Secret Talent Is Getting Tired Without Doing Anything. 37. Don’t Remind Me How Old I Am ! I’ll Always Watch Cartoons. 38. My Problem Is That I Hate Maths But I Love Counting Money. 39. I Love All The Religions Because They All Bring Holidays ! 40. Studying Is My Drug. But Thanks To God. I Say No To Drugs.

Sarcasm Quotes for Twitter

41. Don’t Be Ashamed Of Who You Are. That’s Your Parent’s Job. 42. Everyone Is Matured Until Someone Brings Out Bubble Wrap ! 43. To Be Old & Wise, You Must First Have To Be Young & Stupid. 44. Sarcasm : Because Beating The Crap Out Of People Is Illegal. 45. The Hardest Part Of My Job Is…Being Nice To Stupid People ! 46. Never Laugh At Your Girlfriend’s Choice. You Are One Of Them. 47. It’s Okay If You Don’t Like Me…Not Everyone Has Good Taste. 48. If You Want A Sarcastic Answer, Don’t Ask A Stupid Question. 49. I Live For Two Reasons. 1 . I Was Born 2 . I Haven’t Died Yet. 50. Tom & Jerry Taught Me That Life Is Incomplete Without Enemies. 51. Dear 2017 : Make Sure You Don’t Come Up With Temporary People ! 52. I’M Actually Not Funny. I’M Just Mean & People Think I’M Joking. 53. I Don’t Believe In Plastic Surgery. But In Your Case, Go Ahead. 54. Brain Logic : Let’s Insult Our Best Friend Ore Than Our Enemies. 55. Just Wanna Be Rich Enough To Buy My Mom Everything She Deserves. 56. Show Me You’re Different & I won’t Treat You Like You’re Typical. 57. Thanks To The Wrong People In Life. They Teach The Right Lessons. 58. Sarcasm : The Ability To Insult Idiots Without Them Realizing It. 59. I’M Sorry What Language Are You Speaking ? It Sounds Like Bullshit. 60. Behind Every Successful Person…There’s Lot Of Unsuccessful Years.

61. Damaged People Are More Dangerous Because They Know How To Survive. 62. Everything Is Like Either Expensive, Illegal Or Won’t Text Me Back. 63. The World Is Filled With Good People. If You Can’t Find One, Be One. 64. 3 People Who Call Me. 1. My Mom. 2 . Wrong Number. 3 . Customer Care. 65. Closing Your Eyes After Turning Off The Alarm Is Very Dangerous Game. 66. Don’t Respect Her Because She’s A Girl. Respect Her Because You’re Man. 67. If The Teacher Tell You To Get Out, It Means You Have Won The Argument. 68. The Luckiest Are Those Who Fall Asleep As Soon As They Close Their Eyes. 69. Why People Buy Guitars Now A Days. 10% To Play, 90% To Click Profile Pic. 70. I Want One Of Those Jobs Where I Get Paid For Travelling Around The World. 71. Don’t Judge A Book By It’s Cover. Don’t Judge A Student By His Percentage. 72. May Be You Should Eat Some Makeup So You Can Be Pretty On The Inside Too. 73. My Girlfriend Is So Good At Playing Hide And Seek. I Haven’t Found Her Yet. 74. We Don’t Need Cctv Camera In Our Country. Neighbours & Relatives Are Enough. 75. When People Ask Stupid Questions I Feel Obligated To Give Sarcastic Answers. 76. I Don’t Care What People Think Of Me. At Least Mosquitoes Find Me Attractive ! 77. When I’M Free No One Texts Me ! & When I’M Busy. Bam ! Still No One Texts Me ! 78. True Bonding Is When You And Your Friends Are All Angry About The Same Thing. 79. If You Think Nobody Cares If You’re Alive, Try Missing A Couple Of Car Payments. 80. We All Have That One Teacher Who Give You Amazing Marks On Matter What You Write.

Sarcasm Quotes for Facebook

81. From The Moment I Saw You, I Knew I Was Gonna Spend He Rest Of My Life Avoiding You. 82. Babies Are So Lucky. They Can Sleep All The Day And Everyone Still Would Be Proud Of Them. 83. I’M Sorry I Hurt Your Feelings When I Called You Stupid. I Really Thought You Already Knew. 84. You Cried All Night ? You Were Hurt ? And No One Knows ? Congratulations ! You Are Mature Now. 85. I May Look Calm, But Inside My Mind I’ve Killed You 20 Times, In 5 Mins, In 20 Different Ways. 86. My Attitude In Exams. They Give Me Questions I Don’t Know. I Give Them Answers They Don’t Know. 87. I Can Only Please One Person Per Day. Today Is Not Your Day. Tomorrow Doesn’t Look Good Either. 88. I Love Texting People Who Reply Super Fast. It Makes Me Feel Like They Really Want To Talk To Me. 89. Bring Able To Respond With Sarcasm Within Seconds Of Stupid Question Is A Sign Of A Healthy Brain. 90. At Age Of 25, Others Want To Get Married And Have Kids But I Want My Parents In The Backseat Of My Audi 91. There Are Two Types Of People In The World. 1 . People Who Understand And Appreciate Sarcasm 2 . Idoits. 92. Askhole. A Person Who Constantly Asks For Your Advice, Yet Always Does The Opposite Of What You Told Them. 93. Need Money For College. Need College For A Job. Need A Job For Money. Who Was The Mastermind Behind This System ? 94. What’s The Point Of Education If You Still Throw Garbage On Street To Be Ultimately Picked By An Uneducated Person ? 95. If You Want To Change The World, Do It While You’re Single. Once You’re Married You Can’t Even Change The T.V Channel. 96. Not All Girls Are Made Of Sugar And Spice And Everything Nice. Some Girls Are Made Of Sarcasm, Wind And Everything Fine. 97. I’M Sorry, I Didn’t Realize That You’re And Expert On My Life And How I Should Live It ! Please Continue While I Takes Notes. 98. The Whole Purpose Of Sending A Text Is To Get A Reply Within Seconds Or Minutes Otherwise I Would Have Sent A Letter By F***In Mail. 99. My Future Wife Would Be Probably Texting Her Boyfriend About How They’re Gonna Stay Together. Haha, See You In A Couple Of Years, Sweetie. 100. Don’t worry about hurting my feelings, because I guarantee you not one bit of my self-esteem is tied up in your acceptance.

101. They say women speak 20,000 words a day. I have a daughter who gets that done by breakfast. 102. Excuse me, which level of hell is this? 103. When I’m feeling down and someone says “suck it up”, I get the urge to break their legs and say, “walk it off”. 104. You know that little voice inside your head that keeps you from saying things you shouldn’t? Yeah, I don’t have that. 105. You know what I like about people? Their dogs. 106. People who reply to my sarcasm with sarcasm are my favorite. 107. Have you ever met someone and thought, “There goes the reason why contraceptives were invented?” 108. I’d slap you but that would be animal abuse. 109. Most people have “Ah ha” moments. I have “Oh for f..ck’s sake, f..ck this shit” moments. 110. I have to stop saying how stupid you can be. Some people are starting to take it as a challenge. 111. I think Dildo is a perfectly acceptable insult. I’d call you a d..ck but you’re not real enough. 112. If your phone doesn’t ring, it’s me. 113. When something goes wrong in your life, just yell “Plot Twist” and move on. 114. If someone points at your black clothes and asks, whose funeral it is, you just look around the room, and answer, “haven’t decided yet.” 115. Sweetie, leave the sarcasm and insults to the pros. You’re going to hurt yourself. Go play in traffic. 116. What’s a queen without her king? Well, historically, better. 117. Abracadabra! Nope. You’re still a b..ch. 118. Oh. I’m sorry. Did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours? 119. When people see you laying down with your eyes closed, they still ask “Are you sleeping?” And I’m like, “No. I’m training to die.” 120. Come here you big, beautiful cup of coffee and lie to me about how much we’re going to get done today.

Sarcasm Quotes for Whatsapp

121. My alone time is sometimes for your safety. 122. Sometimes I wish I could get a refund on the time I have invested on people that weren’t worth it. 123. I wish more people were fluent in silence. 124. Deja Poo. The feeling that you’ve heard this crap before. 125. I’m a lady, but when I’m mad, I am an evil sadistic demon spawned b..ch from hell that will make you regret the day you were born. And when I’m happy, I like to bake cookies and shit. 126. I’m an odd combination of “really sweet” and “don’t mess with me.” 127. I am in one of those moods where I just want to throw a book at someone’s face and be like: I facebooked you. 128. Controlling my tongue is no problem. It’s my face that needs deliverance. 129. Trying to understand some people is like trying to pick up a turd by the clean end 130. Hmmm, I’m going to file your opinions right here between “f..ck this” and “f..ck that”. 131. I’m not petty, I’m dead ass disrespectful and I will straight up disrespect you if you want to play that petty game. Your feelings will be hurt. 132. Everything I like is either expensive, illegal, or won’t text me back. 133. Some people are a human version of a migraine. 134. Grammar. The difference between knowing your shit and knowing you’re shit. 135. If only closed minds came with closed mouths. 136. People think I’m shy because I don’t get involved in their conversations. The truth is, I don’t give a f..ck what they’re talking about. 137. I hate it when I think I’m buying organic vegetables but when I get home, I discover they’re just regular donuts. 138. It’s a beautiful day to leave me alone. 139. Congratulations! You’ve managed to make me feel like a worthless piece of shit again. Would you like an award for that? 140. I’m sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. I really thought you already knew.

141. Life is a soup and I’m a freaking fork. 142. Some people are just treasures that you just want to bury them. 143. Sweetie, I’m going to need you to put those few remaining brain cells together and work with me here, Okay? 144. In order to insult me, I must value your opinion. Nice try though. 145. I’ve got heels higher than your standards. 146. If you don’t like and still watch everything I do, b..tch you are a fan. 147. I may look calm but in my mind, I’ve killed you three times. 148. Oh sure, you’re smart. Sesame Street smart. 149. Don’t worry about what I’m doing. Worry about why you’re worried about what I’m doing. 150. I’d rather be someone’s shot of whiskey than everyone’s cup of tea. 151. Oh, my bad. I’m sorry for bothering you. I forgot I only exist when you need me for something. 152. If you don’t want a sarcastic answer, don’t ask a stupid question. 153. Shhhhhhhhhhhhh. No one cares. 154. Oh, you hate me? Join the club! There are weekly meetings at the corner of F..ck You St. and Kiss My Ass Blvd. 155. I’m 97% sure you don’t like me but I’m 100% sure I don’t care. 156. Your flexibility amazes me. How do you get your food in your mouth and your head up your ass all at the same time? 157. I don’t have a bad temper. I just have a quick reaction to bullshit. 158. Listen, I’m a nice person. So if I’m a b..ch to you, you need to ask yourself why. 159. Good morning world! Your little ray of sarcastic sunshine has arrived! 160. People say I act like I don’t care. It’s not an act.

161. I try not to laugh at my own jokes but we all know I’m hilarious. 162. You are the result of 4 billion years of evolution. So act like it. 163. I’m sorry, I don’t take orders. I barely take suggestions. 164. I am the friend you have to explain to your other friends before they meet me. 165. It’s nearly time for my Psychotic Break. 166. I know I don’t have to be sarcastic, but the world has given me so much material to work with. I would hate to be wasteful. 167. Here’s a tissue, you have a little bullshit on your lip. 168. Only dead fish go with the flow. 169. Some people will only like you if you fit inside their box. Don’t be afraid to shove that box up their ass. 170. If I say “First of all”. Run away because I have prepared research, data, and charts and will destroy you. 171. In my defense, I was left unsupervised. 172. I am a nice person. Just don’t push the b..ch button. 173. The B..ch Slap. Keeping a..holes in line since 1836. 174. Warning. I’m bored. Things could get dangerous. 175. I am currently experiencing life at the speed of 15 wtf’s per hour. 176. Interviewer: What do you make at your current job? Me: Mostly mistakes and inappropriate comments. 177. I’m confident my last words will be, “Are you fu…ng kidding me?” 178. I’ve come to a point in my life where I need a stronger word than f..ck. 179. We all have problems. Some of us just choose not to post them on Facebook. 180. In all honesty, things would’ve never worked between us. I’m a unicorn, you’re a donkey; I’m majestic, and you my love are just an ass.

181. It must be hard putting makeup on your two faces every day. 182. Nothing brings a group of a…holes together faster than something that’s none of their business. 183. Don’t be an a..hole to me, cause then I have to be an a..hole to you. And I’m way better at being an a..hole than you are. 184. My decision-making skills closely resemble that of a squirrel when crossing the street. 185. Some people are like Slinky’s. Pretty much useless but make you smile when you push them down the stairs. 186. I would like to confirm that I do not care. 187. Of course, I talk to myself. Sometimes I need expert advice. 188. Breaking someone’s trust is like crumpling up a perfect piece of paper. You can smooth it over but it’s never going to be the same again. 189. Please cancel my subscription to your issues. 190. Be the reason someone smiles today. Or the reason they drink. Whatever works. 191. Patience. What you have when there are too many witnesses. 192. Good judgment comes from experience. And experience? Well, that comes from poor judgment. 193. I don’t know how to accept compliments. So thanks, suck a d..ck or whatever. 194. I need a cocktail. Hold the tail. 195. I’ve met some pricks in my time, but you my friend, are the f..cking cactus. 196. I don’t always tolerate stupid people. But when I do, I’m probably at work. 197. Quick Tip: Mind your own motherf…ng goddamn business b..ch. 198. My loyalty cannot be bought. However, it can be rented. 199. I’m definitely a morning person but often choose to sleep straight through it. 200. Mom: What did you learn in school today sweetheart? Me: Obviously not enough. I have to go back tomorrow.

In every sarcastic remark we hear, there is always some truth behind it. It’s easier to express our feelings to other people by being sarcastic. It makes the person laugh a little and accept the advice you say without them feeling offended. But being sarcastic can be a little harsh as well. We find ourselves using sarcastic quotes or remarks usually when we deal with our friends and family members. We use it as a way of dealing with issues in relationships, in decision making, and in life in general. If you want to know why sarcasm has now become a meaningful way to express one’s feelings, you have to familiarize yourself with them.

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