#also I showed this to my present-day sister and made a banana pun but I can’t remember it

[thejadecount]

Shoutout to my past 13 year old little sister who got lost in the store once and became a 17th century English explorer for an hour

[simplyshelbs16xoxo]

‘A World of Fragile Things’ Chapter 4: All My Fears Turn to Rage

               Ron was worried; not forgetting to turn in a few assignments worried, but it’s-the-end-of-the-world kind of worried. They had been trekking through the forest towards Yamanouchi for what felt like forever. It would have felt like old times, but the fact that Drakken and Shego were present made the situation feel much more dire. His eyes flickered over towards Kim, her auburn hair tied up into a high ponytail. Her face outwardly showed determination and the fearlessness she always exuded, but Ron knew to look past the surface. After all, he had known her his whole life. Kim was exhausted, and rightly so. From the look in her eyes, if you searched deep enough, her fear was as plain as the nose on her face.

               Kim caught his eyes, giving him a soft smile. She reached out for his hand, interlocking their fingers together. She squeezed his hand three times; that was their silent way of saying ‘I love you.’ There appeared to be a break in the thick forest trees up ahead, and surely enough the bridge to Yamanouchi presented itself to them.

               “It’s about time,” Drakken remarked. “These bugs are getting on my last nerve.” Shego elbowed him not-so-lightly. “Well, they are,” he continued as they walked across the rickety bridge.

               “Sensei said he would be awaiting us in the courtyard,” Yori told them. “I can see him from here.” Surely enough, everyone else saw the small dot of a man in the distance. Yamanouchi had definitely suffered from the attack that happened just days before Hana was kidnapped. There were portions of the structure on the ground in several pieces.

               “I see we have two more guests than expected,” Sensei pointed out when the group arrived. “Drew Lipsky and Sheena Gordon.”

               Drakken’s jaw dropped, and Shego’s hands began to glow. “How do you know our names?” she demanded.

               “Sensei is clairvoyant,” Yori explained. “He knows and sees all except for how Fukushima’s plans will affect us.”

               Shego scoffed. “Well, that’s not very helpful is it, Mystic Man?”

               “Shego!” Kim hissed. “Now’s not the time for snark.”

               What Kim saw as disrespect, Drakken saw as a defense mechanism. He could differentiate between Shego’s attitudes. This particular bit of ‘snark,’ as Kim put it, was what Drakken had come to understand to be Shego’s alternative to showing fear. When in a stressful, life-threatening situation, she tended to give attitude, but it was downplayed more than her usual cockiness. It was very rare for her to be afraid, which surprisingly made Drakken feel braver; or perhaps he was feeling protective, which in turn, would boost his valor.

               “It is quite alright,” Sensei told them. “Stressful situations tend to bring out the worst in people.” He turned to Ron, studying him for a moment. “Stoppable-San, as you know, the Lotus Blade was taken by Fukushima, as well as your sister. She is needed for his plan, which tells us that he plans to unearth the Yono yet again.”

               The faces of Kim, Ron, and Yori were horror-stricken. The last time the Yono had been unearthed, everyone but Hana had been turned to stone. Though Hana defeated the one who unearthed the Yono, they were very close to eternal destruction.

               “What?” Drakken asked as he and Shego noticed the expressions on everyone’s faces. “Who’s this Yono?” Shego pinched the bridge of her nose at Drakken’s use of air quotes.

               Sensei, sensing the tension in the air, motioned for everyone to follow him inside. “Come, and we’ll talk it over with tea. I will tell you the tale of Yono.”

.

.

               Fukushima dug through the coarse dirt in Simia Canyon, searching for the golden pull ring of the Yono’s temple. Hana had finally woken, and was now running around the canyon, distracting him from his work. He couldn’t allow her to get away, as that would risk his chance of receiving absolute power. Digging through his satchel, Fukushima found the powder he had used on Kim Possible. He lifted Hana in his arms and sprinkled the substance over her, putting her tiny body in stasis for the time being.

               After another hour of digging, the pull ring was just barely visible, but it was enough for Fukushima to grab ahold of, and lift. He was thrown back, and watched as the monkey temple rose from the depths of the earth. A turned-to-stone Monkey Fist could be seen at the top of the temple, forever frozen in a prison of his own making.

               Not for long, Fukushima thought. “Simian mon kayala uwono aluay ken servant.” He felt the ground quake, and looked up at Monkey Fist who had begun to move, but still made of stone. Emerging out of the temple’s entrance was a cloaked figure that stopped just a couple of feet from him.

               “I am Yono,” he bellowed, ripping away the cloak to reveal a short brown monkey with piercing green eyes dressed in a purple Mandarin tunic with gold trim.

               “Fukushima!” Monkey Fist shouted. He disappeared out of thin air from the top of the temple, and reappeared atop of the steps. “Have you come to finish what I began?”

               “I have bigger plans than having you become the monkey master,” Fukushima scoffed. “Ever hear of the War of Darkness?”

.

.

               Shego sipped her tea tentatively, unable to figure out if she liked it or not. She had always been more of a coffee person, but when in Rome…or Japan, rather. Sensei was pouring tea for Kim and Ron, who looked to be in deep conversation on the other side of the room. Shego had never seen Possible look so exhausted in all the years they were acquainted. She was itching to find out more about this Yono character, and why it signified danger all around.

               “Gather around,��� Sensei told them. Kim and Ron finally sat down between Sensei and Yori, facing their former foes. He looked at Drakken and Shego. “I take it you were told of the War of Darkness?” They nodded. “Yakunan plays a large role in the tale of the Yono.”

               “He does? You never told us that before,” Ron remarked.

               “We shall start from the beginning,” Sensei said softly. “His full title is Yono the Destroyer. When Toshimiru claimed victory, he banished Yakunan, and had him sent away to the hidden valleys of Simia Canyon. Unbeknownst to Toshimiru, Yakunan had meddled with the darkest of magic previously. This dark magic kept him truly immortal. This kind of magic required human sacrifice, and Yakunan gave plenty after slaying so many on the battlefield. However, he did not anticipate the transition into a monkey, as he was only made so by his jealousy of Toshimiru being the monkey master.” Sensei took a sip of his tea, observing everyone’s reactions. By the look on Kim and Ron’s faces, they had figured it out. “Yakunan would remain immortal, but would live out his days as a monkey imbued with the power of wielding the darkest magic in the world, only able to help those evil enough to seek him, for he is the one they call the Yono.”

               “Soooo,” Shego began. “We’re scared of…a monkey?”

               “A monkey who wields dark powers,” Drakken pointed out.

               “And who has caused death and destruction in his wake every time he is summoned,” Yori added. Gesturing toward Kim and Ron, she said, “We are lucky that we survived our last encounter with him, but it was only because Monkey Fist was unable to get Hana to comply.”

               “That’s the other part that doesn’t add up…what does Stoppable’s little sister have to do with any of this?”

               “My sister is a ninja prodigy, but is also the weapon called The Han,” Ron explained. “For reasons still unknown, the Yono has a connection to the monkey mystic weapon that my sister apparently is.”

               “From what I could tell from Monkey Fist’s ramblings, if you are able to have The Yono and The Han comply with your wishes, you’ll gain endless power to do with what you wish,” Kim added.

               "And how do you even know all of this, if it isn't common knowledge?" Shego asked Sensei. "I mean, you're old and wise, I get that, but how are you sure?"

               "Because," Sensei paused for dramatic effect, "I am Toshimiru."

.

.

                After the shock of Sensei's revelation wore off, Yori stood up, gesturing for Kim, Ron, Drakken, and Shego to follow her. “It is time that we get some rest, I suspect. We have all had a long night.” The sun was just beginning to rise over the mountains, but not one person in the room had enough sleep to still be standing. “I will show you to your rooms. I assume it will be alright to share?” The four guests looked at each other in surprise. Yori laughed, realizing they thought all four of them would be sharing one room. “I meant to say that Drakken and Shego will share one room, while you and Stoppable-San share another.” The look of relief on everyone’s faces was extremely noticeable.  

               Drakken and Shego settled as comfortably as possible on the bed roll, though that wasn’t saying much. Her eyes closed instantly, and she was veering off into sweet obliviousness until Drakken’s quiet laughing woke her up. “What are you laughing at???” she asked irritably.

               “I was just thinking, maybe we shouldn’t fight this monkey; he might use gorilla warfare,” he laughed. “Get it? Cause guerilla war—oh never mind.”  He noticed the roll of Shego’s eyes. “This whole thing is just bananas!” And the laughter started up again. “We can’t be caught monkeying around, you know.”

               Shego growled. “That’s it! If you tell me one more pun, I’m shoving you off this bed.”

               “But—“

               “No.”

               “Just—“

               “Sleep!” Her tone was crueler than she meant to be. She harrumphed as she turned herself away from him, unable to get rid of that niggling feeling in the pit of her stomach. She knew that Drakken was only trying to ease the tension that Sensei’s story filled the air with, but the fear she felt had her lashing out at everyone.

               Meanwhile, Kim and Ron were continuing their heated conversation from earlier, neither bothering to at least sit upon the bed roll.

               Kim’s eyes were aflame with frustration. “Ron, I don’t care how many times you say it, I’m not just going to get up and leave. Yes, Fukushima is after enacting revenge on you, and the world, but the truth is, I’ll be in danger no matter where I am. You don’t have to do any of this alone.”

               “You don’t know what you’re saying, KP. You need sleep,” Ron told her, sitting down on the bed roll. “We both do. Hopefully, tomorrow you’ll realize how absurd you’re being.”

               “Excuse me!?” Kim exclaimed. “I’m being absurd? Who’s the one planning on taking down Fukushima head-on without any backup? You can’t do that, Ron, it’s certain death!”

               “But it’ll ensure that you stay alive!” he argued. Kim was taken aback by this statement. He sounded so sure of it.

               “Ron,” her voice softened, “how can you be so sure of that?” He said nothing, but slipped a small, rolled piece of parchment from his pocket. “What is this?”

               “I found it in Hana’s room,” he told her. “Read it.”

               Outsider, your sister will not come into any harm, as I need her alive in order to enact my plans. However, if you want Possible to remain alive, meet me in two days’ time in Simia Canyon where you will inevitably perish for the woman you love.

               Kim couldn’t stop the tears from welling up in her eyes due to her anger and fear. “Ron, you can’t do this! I’m not worth this. There’s always another way.” She sat down beside him.

               “Not worth this? KP, you’re worth everything good in this world.” Ron’s determination to die for her was frightening. Not that she wouldn’t do the same for him, but what good would it be to not even try to defeat Fukushima together?

               “I won’t let you do this alone,” she told him. “We’ll get Hana back, we’ll defeat Fukushima, and send the Yono and Monkey Fist back in the ground. It seems impossible, but well, do I have to say it?”

               Ron smiled at her, unable to keep it from his face.

               “Anything’s possible for a Possible,” they spoke in unison. “And don’t you forget it,” Kim added.   

.

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FFN | Ao3 | Buy Me a Coffee?  

[readingwebcomics]

Analyzing Questionable Content: Pages 1-50

And so it begins.

The very first comic of Questionable Content, posted way back in 2003 and what would eventually be Jeff Jacques’ claim to fame, the reason why everyone remembers his name and what has made him a wealthy man today.

…’s alright.

Of course, by modern standards it’s not very good. This was the early 2000s, the wild west of online artists who had nothing more than an art creation software and a dream. The Webcomic Review has a VERY good post about it right here, which explains what the landscape of webcomics were like around this time and why exactly Marten has a pet robot (tl;dr, EVERYONE had a pet robot in ye early days of webcomics because Megatokyo).

But aside from the… awkward art, this comic at least serves to set up the protagonist (as far as we’re aware right now, we’ll get into the roles of protagonists in QC later). He’s a lanky, assumedly average guy who hates where he is in life but doesn’t know what else to do or even where else to go…

…as he goes on to spell out two comics later. He’s unassuming, not really much you can say for or against him, miserable and stuck in a rut in his life that he’s too scared to escape. Sooo basically, freshly graduated college students – the exact kind of audience a RomCom like this would go after.

Oh, did I forget to mention?

Yeah, QC started off as a RomCom.

This young woman is Faye, and she immediately cuts through the bullshit with an aggressive but to-the-point introduction of herself and her intentions.

While aggressive and to-the-point, she’s also set up as someone who meshes with Marten and Steve’s interests well enough and quickly makes friends. This is probably best exemplified in the seventh page, which serves two purposes:

Purpose the First: Showcase Marten and Faye have a shared niche interest, immediately establishing chemistry between the two of them. Be it platonic or romantic, they’re quickly hitting it off and, being a RomCom, will serve as the first rope potential shippers can grasp onto.

Purpose the Second: Jeff is a MASSIVE indie music nerd and he wants the fucking world to know it.

Also Pintsize is there doing funny robot things because 2003 webcomic.

It’s not long before this initial relationship is set up that two issues serve to sew the seeds of initial conflict:

This, likewise, serves two purposes: To show where Faye works and create a believable life for her to exist in when she’s not in the story with Marten, and as previously stated to sew potential romantic conflicts in the future. Jeff employs this tactic many-a-time throughout the course of Questionable Content, beginning a conflict and letting the implications sit with the reader while life goes on in the regular comics. Is this good writing? I honestly can’t say. Is it always done well? Oh good God no, some plot beats are outright dropped or left to sit for so long the reader straight-up forgets it’s there with this method. But does Jeff make it work? It’s all on personal taste I’d say, but personally it sits well with me.

Also, for those of you wondering why it looks like the word “hump” is just pasted onto the text bubble in post… well it was. The original comic implied sexual assault much more overtly, using the R-word instead of “hump.”

*Away from mic* Wait, can-can I say [NOPE]? Better not to risk it? Alright, fair ‘nuff.

But yeah, this was pointed out by readers to be pretty fucked up and it was swiftly changed, for good reason.

Later that night, Faye asks Marten to dinner with her. Platonically, of course. And here I believe I should point out the dynamic of their relationship as it stands – Faye is the aggressor. Marten is basically a doormat. Whenever something happens, Faye is always the instigator, be it going out to dinner or tagging along with him when he’s getting shopping done. This will feed into their relationship dynamic and sets up a decent inter-personal conflict: Marten is far too passive to reach out to Faye and make the move to start something, but Faye, despite how openly and quickly she attaches herself to Marten’s life, never takes that step into making it romantic. The two clearly have the hots for each other, but their respective personalities make it so neither one crosses that threshold.

Yes I know this is basic character writing for a RomCom 101, but the fact that so much about these characters are said in 12 four-panel comics says a lot. It hooks the reader quickly and gets them on the page Jeff wants them to be, and I respect that.

And in the next page, Faye’s aggression takes on a new level, albeit extremely briefly.

This is an isolated incident of actual physical aggression rather than implications and threats in these first 50 pages, but it becomes a trend as we go along – one that feeds into Faye’s character, mind, so it’s not just physical abuse for humor’s sake – so just keep it in mind as we go along.

Also on a personal note the actual restaurant they go to is simultaneously the worst and best idea I’ve ever heard of:

This is horrible. I should not encourage this. And yet some dark part of me finds the concept utterly hilarious even though I know I’m a piece of shit for liking it.

Actually, now some part of me wants to do the exact opposite – advertise a place as a steakhouse only serve an all-vegan menu. It feels less mean but just as funny to me.

…oh right, the comic.

After sharing dinner, exchanging banter that establishes good chemistry and parting ways, we come to this comic that I’m only showing because I’m a slut for good puns and I will take any and all opportunities to share with people.

(Pintsize totally won that round with the John the Baptist zinger by the way, if I’m allowed to judge this.)

And one page later, we get the biggest shake-up in the comic thus far:

It’s established Faye herself ended up burning down the apartment because she burnt toast, but that’s not really important. I know, the fact Faye BURNT DOWN A BUILDING isn’t important sounds completely ridiculous, but follow me here – the important thing for this setup isn’t the how, but the why. “How did Faye’s apartment burn down?” isn’t the question Jeff, nor the audience, is intended to be asking, that’s merely a vessel into the situation we’re in – the answer of “Why did Faye’s apartment burn down?” which is, of course, so Marten and Faye can become roommates and facilitate future antics and further their relationship. Familiarity breeds into both affection and conflict, and the obvious case of “Well you two are already living together, aren’t you?” will serve to further the flames of their potential relationship with one another.

…granted, a better reason to create this setup would’ve been nice, and from a writing standpoint it’s ridiculous that Faye never suffers any consequences for burning an entire BUILDING down, one that had many more people than just her in it. If present-day Jeff wrote this plotline… actually. Now that I think about it, Jeff DOES re-do this plot point and make it make a lot more sense and have a lot more impact on everyone involved.

But we’ll get to that when we eventually talk about Brun…. Three thousand and something pages from now.

Either way, my point stands: This plot thread serves mostly to create the situation we’re facing now, one where Faye and Marten end up living together. This shake-up to the early comic settles us into the new status quo, one that we’ll be riding with comfortably for the foreseeable future.

Further evidence of Faye’s aggressive and troll-ish nature… one that may or may not play into future revelations about her, now that I think about it.

Remember what I said about sewing the seeds of drama? Well here we stand now – a misunderstanding, or the beginning of genuine conflict between these two?

The answer is… they talk it out like actual goddamn adults, avoiding a stupid, unnecessary fight.

Honestly? Kind of refreshing. But what makes it better is the following page:

Honestly? This moment never fails to make me laugh. The one-two punch of complete betrayal of the reader’s expectations as well as the utter dismantling and defusal of the romantic interest subplot between these two dorks – while denying some genuine romantic conflict that may force Faye into being more upfront with how she feels about the situation – is a fun denial of the kinds of RomCom clichés that one might expect to find in this story.

Sure, there are other stories that do this better, I’m not denying that. But isolated in a bubble, this stands by itself and, frankly, works well enough for the story Jeff’s telling.

Also say goodbye to Sara, once she walks out that door she goes to join the little sister from Family Matters and the big brother from Happy Days on the twisted Island of Irrelevancy, visiting the story only when she can spare the time to craft a raft out of banana leafs and... where was I going with this?

…okay, personal story time. The Walmart I’m doing contract work for this week has a CD display of new-ish albums, and honest-to-God I completely forgot music CDs were even a THING. MP3s have spoiled us, and I now feel old for some reason.

Right, getting back on track.

I wanted to show this comic to establish three things.

1) Marten is the kind of person who sits on things that bother him and lets them stew for awhile. As established in the previous image I showed with Marten and Steve at the music store, it’s been at least a day since what happened with Sara and Marten’s still thinking about it. This, for better or worse, becomes a core part of Marten’s character moving forward.

2) Faye, for all her faults, is a genuinely good friend who cares about Marten and knows when to channel her natural aggression into support rather than ribbing.

3) This is another comic that always makes me laugh whenever I read it. Yes I know that’s much less of a real reason than my other two points but let me have this dammit.

This particular page itself isn’t terribly important to the ongoing narrative but I wanted to include it because it introduces QC’s unquestionably best character, Jim. Hi Jim! I like Jim.

(He’s a minor character at best but he’s just so earnest and fun and every time Jeff brings him back he just gets better and better.)

Oh, and for those who were skeptical that the more-than-platonic interest was mutual between Marten and Faye, the next two issues serve to showcase that… yeah, both parties TOTALLY have the hots for each other.

The first of those two comics, by the way, gets called back to much later down the line. And the fact that Faye speaks in a southern accent is more than just a joke, it’s going to be touched on more later.

Jeff says in the description of this comic that this is based on personal experience, and it shows – this is the most backbone Marten displays to my memory.

And in the very next page, we’re introduced to a new character – although you wouldn’t guess it from her appearance.

That’s Raven. I like Raven. Her personality changes a ton once she’s properly introduced as a character and not a nameless employee, but for posterity’s sake: Here’s her very first appearance in the comic.

There’s only one more important comic to touch on in this batch of fifty, and it’s about both Marten and Faye’s families:

While this could be as simple as a “har-dee-har, my family drives me up the wall,” this comic serves to say a lot about both characters once we know more about their families. Both Marten and Faye actually have very good reasons why they don’t want to see their respective families or go back to their hometowns… Faye especially so. We’ll touch more on that when we get more into her backstory.

Before we wrap things up, I’d like to do a quick comparison between page 1 and 50 to see in what small, subtle ways Jeff’s artistry has improved:

There’s not a LOT of difference, but the small details really showcases just how different they look. Small changes from the placement of everything on Marten’s face, to the size of the eyes, the width of the eyebrows… It’s good shit.

Overall, what did I think of batch 1? Well… for an early 2000s webcomic, it’s engaging. The characters are likable, the plot is progressing at an enjoyable pace, and I’m already on-board to see if Marten and Faye will get together. I mean, I know the answer, but my point stands.

Also because I’m a freak or something and like data compilation I went ahead and kept track of who showed up in what comic and made some numbers for it:

Not counting the one guest comic and two non-canon pages, Marten showed up in 45/50 pages, being in 90% of the comic so far.

Faye was in 38/50 pages, taking up 76% of the comic so far.

Pintsize comes in third place being in 15/50 comics, taking up a paltry 30% of the comic thus far when compared to the screen time Marten and Faye have taken up.

Likewise, Steve has been in only 8/50 pages, making up 16% of the comic up to this point.

Sara was in 5/50 pages, making up 10% of these first 50. That percentile will grow smaller and smaller with each update, believe you me.

Jim was in 2/50 glorious pages, making up 4% of the comic up to this point. And that was the best 4% this comic had to offer, let me tell you.

Raven, although still unnamed, I’m counting – she’s in 1/50 of the first batch of pages, making up 2% of screen time.

Tune in next week as we continue onwards to pages 51-100 where we’ll be introduced to the next major character in the series, who’s mere existence will further the plot more than anyone we’ve previously met. See you then.