#also ive rewatched it at least 20 times so i have the comfort of knowing what happnes

[soft-bugs]

. :)

[sothischickshe]

Hi! Do you think there is a before and after in your life after watching Good Girls?

I mean, I know it wasn't the best show ever haha, but what I'm trying to say is if this whole experience and everything we've talked about the plot of the show, do you feel it's taught you anything?

hey sweet, this is SUCH a good question <3

so for me, i think there's definitely a directly before gg because i found the show (only the first season had aired back then) when i was Really Going Through It, and it literally (& quickly!) became very much a comfort show for me. 

and there’s definitely a during-after for me, because it led me back to fandom and to fanfiction. while i had written a couple of fics long ago, i’d never published them or even considered it, so the fact this show led to me publishing fics (20!! apparently!!! huh!!!) AND making writing a part of my life again means it will alllllways have a very special place in my heart <3

i definitely think the experience of watching & discussing the show has taught me a lot about writing & also about me. i think (at least/especially for ff) i enjoy having something to write against, & it’s helped me narrow in on what i find dis/satisfying from a story, as well as what kind of tone resonates with me.

i don’t know i feel like there’s a distinct after for me per se, my experience of watching & discussing the show is so bound up in the experience of rediscovering fandom (i hadn’t been very active in one for a while) & fanfiction (i did read some but i wasn’t actively seeking it out) & actively writing (and publishing!!! ahhh!!! scary!!!!) & just feeling like...shipping-vindicated...? (shoutout to my one friend who’d seen gg back when i watched s1 & was all ‘huh what eyefucking i dont see it’ & basically made the top of my head fall off). and i don’t intend to stop discussing the show (im planning to rewatch s3 at some point soonish) or reading/writing fic, so even though it’s ended, i feel very much like we’re still during, haha. 

plus there’s always the terrifying prospect of reboots or remakes or adaptations or spinoffs or weird word of god announcements, but also fandom events etc, and just fandom generally which doesnt shrivel up just bc canon’s now frozen! in many ways ive enjoyed this show more on hiatus than any other time, and now we’re on permanent hiatus so im in a great mood! haha

& how about for yourself??

[birdlord]

Everything I Watched in 2020

We’ll start with movies. The number in parentheses is the year of release, asterisks denote a re-watch, and titles in bold are my favourite watches of the year. Here’s 2019’s list. 

01 Little Women (19)

02 The Post (17) 

03 Molly’s Game (17)

04 * Doctor No (62)

05 Groundhog Day (93)

06 *Star Trek IV - The Voyage Home (86)

07 Knives Out (19) My last theatre experience (sob)

08 Professor Marston and his Wonder Women (17)

09 Les Miserables (98)

10 Midsommar (19) I’m not sure how *good* it is, but it does stick in the ol’ brain

11 *Manhattan Murder Mystery (93)

12 Marriage Story (19)

13 Kramer vs Kramer (79)

14 Jojo Rabbit (19)

15 J’ai perdu mon corps (19) a cute animated film about a hand detached from its body!

16 1917 (19)

17 Married to the Mob (88)

18 Klaus (19)

19 Portrait of a Lady on Fire (19) If Little Women made me want to wear a scarf criss-crossed around my torso, this one made me want to wear a cloak

20 The Last Black Man in San Francisco (19)

21 *Lawrence of Arabia (62)

22 Gone With the Wind (39)

23 Kiss Me Deadly (55)

24 Dredd (12)

25 Heartburn (86) heard a bunch about this one in the Blank Check series on Nora Ephron, sadly after I’d watched it

26 The Long Shot (19)

27 Out of Africa (85)

28 King Kong (46)

29 *Johnny Mnemonic (95)

30 Knocked Up (07)

31 Collateral (04)

32 Bird on a Wire (90)

33 The Black Dahlia (05)

34 Long Time Running (17)

35 *Magic Mike (12)

36 Before the Devil Knows You’re Dead (07)

37 Cold War (18)

38 *Kramer Vs Kramer (79) yes I watched this a few months before! This was a pandemic friend group co-watch.

39 *Burn After Reading (08)

40 Last Holiday (50)

41 Fly Away Home (96)

42 *Moneyball (11) I’m sure I watch this every two years, at most??

43 Last Holiday (06) the Queen Latifah version of the 1950 movie above, lacking, of course, the brutal “poor people don’t deserve anything good” ending

44 *Safe (95)

45 Gimme Shelter (70)

46 The Daytrippers (96)

47 Experiment in Terror (62)

48 Tucker: The Man and His Dream (88)

49 My Brilliant Career (79) one of the salvations of 2020 was watching movies “with” friends. Our usual method was to video chat before the movie, sync our streaming services, and text-chat while the movie was on. 

50 Divorce Italian Style (61)

51 *Gosford Park (01) another classic comfort watch, fuck I love a G. Park

52 Hopscotch (80)

53 Brief Encounter (45)

54 Hud (63)

55 Ocean’s 8 (18)

56 *Beverly Hills Cop (84)

57 Blow the Man Down (19)

58 Constantine (05)

59 The Report (19) maddening!! How are people so consistently terrible to one another!

60 Everyday People (04)

61 Anatomy of a Murder (58)

62 Spiderman: Homecoming (17)

63 *To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar (95) Of the 90s drag road movies, Priscilla is more visually striking, but this has its moments.

64 Twin Peaks: Fire Walk with Me (92)

65 *The Truman Show (98)

66 Mona Lisa (86)

67 The Blob (58)

68 The Guard (11)

69 *Waiting for Guffman (96) RIP Fred Willard

70 Rocketman (19)

71 Outside In (18)

72 The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (08) how strange to see a movie that you have known the premise for, but no details of, for over a decade

73 *Star Trek: The Undiscovered Country (91)

74 The Reader (08)

75 Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker (19) This was fine until it VERY MUCH WAS NOT FINE

76 The End of the Affair (99) you try to watch a fun little romp about infidelity during the Blitz, and Graham Greene can’t help but shoehorn in a friggin crisis of religious faith

77 Must Love Dogs (05) barely any dog content, where are the dogs at

78 The Rainmaker (97)

79 *Batman & Robin (97)

80 National Lampoon’s Vacation (83) Never seen any of the non-xmas Vacations, didn’t realize the children are totally different, not just actors but ages! Also, this one is blatantly racist!

81 *Mystic Pizza (88)

82 Funny Girl (68)

83 The Sons of Katie Elder (65)

84 *Knives Out (19) another re-watch within the same year!! How does this keep happening??

85 *Scott Pilgrim Vs The World (10) a real I-just-moved-away-from-Toronto nostalgia watch

86 Canadian Bacon (92) vividly recall this VHS at the video store, but I never saw it til 2020

87 *Blood Simple (85)

88 Brittany Runs a Marathon (19)

89 The Accidental Tourist (88)

90 August Osage County (13) MELO-DRAMA!!

91 Appaloosa (08)

92 The Firm (93) Feeling good about how many iconic 80s/90s video store stalwarts I watched in 2020

93 *Almost Famous (00)

94 Whisper of the Heart (95)

95 Da 5 Bloods (20)

96 Rain Man (88)

97 True Stories (86)

98 *Risky Business (83) It’s not about what you think it’s about! It never was!

99 *The Big Chill (83)

100 The Way We Were (73)

101 Safety Last (23) It’s getting so that I might have to add the first two digits to my dates...not that I watch THAT many movies from the 1920s...

102 Phantasm (79)

103 The Burrowers (08)

104 New Jack City (91)

105 The Vanishing (88)

106 Sisters (72)

107 Puberty Blues (81) Little Aussie cinema theme, here

108 Elevator to the Gallows (58)

109 Les Diaboliques (55)

110 House (77) haha WHAT no really W H A T

111 Death Line (72)

112 Cranes are Flying (57)

113 Holes (03)

114 *Lady Vengeance (05)

115 Long Weekend (78)

116 Body Double (84)

117 The Crazies (73) I love that Romero shows the utter confusion that would no doubt reign in the case of any kind of disaster. Things fall apart.

118 Waterlilies (07)

119 *You’re Next (11)

120 Event Horizon (97)

121 Venom (18) I liked it, guys, way more than most superhero fare. Has a real sense of place and the place ISN’T New York!

122 Under the Silver Lake (18) RIP Night Call

123 *Blade Runner (82)

124 *The Birds (62) interesting to see now that I’ve read the story it came from

125 *28 Days Later (02) hits REAL FUCKIN’ DIFFERENT in a pandemic

126 Life is Sweet (90)

127 *So I Married an Axe Murderer (93) find me a more 90s movie, I dare you (it’s not possible)

128 Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner (67)

129 The Pelican Brief (93) 90s thrillers continue!

130 Dick Johnston is Dead (20)

131 The Bridges of Madison County (95)

132 Earth Girls are Easy (88) Geena Davis and Jeff Goldblum are so hot in this movie, no wonder they got married 

133 Better Watch Out (16)

134 Drowning Mona (00) trying for something like the Coen bros and not getting there

135 Au Revoir Les Enfants (87)

136 *Chasing Amy (97) Affleck is the least alluring movie lead...ever? I also think I gave Joey Lauren Adams’ character short shrift in my memory of the movie. It’s not good, but she’s more complicated than I recalled. 

137 Blackkklansman (18)

138 Being Frank (19)

139 Kiki’s Delivery Service (89)

140 Uncle Frank (20) why so many FRANKS

141 *National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation (89) watching with pals (virtually) made it so much more fun than the usual yearly watch!

142 Half Baked (98) another, more secret Toronto nostalgia pic - RC Harris water filtration plant as a prison!

143 We’re the Millers (13)

144 All is Bright (13)

145 Defending Your Life (91)

146 Christmas Chronicles (18) I maintain that most new xmas movies are terrible, particularly now that Netflix churns them out like eggnog every year. 

147 Spiderman: Into the Spider-Verse (18)

148 Reindeer Games (00) what did I say about Affleck??!? WHAT DID I SAY

149 Palm Springs (20)

150 Happiest Season (20)

151 *Metropolitan (90) it’s definitely a Christmas movie

152 Black Christmas (74)

THEATRE:HOME - 2:150 (thanks pandemic)

I usually separate out docs and fiction, but I watched almost no documentaries this year (with the exception of Dick Johnston). Reality is real enough. 

TV Series

01 - BoJack Horseman (final season) - Pretty damned poignant finish to the show, replete with actual consequences for our reformed bad boy protagonist (which is more than you can say for most antiheroes of Peak TV).

02 - *Hello Ladies - I enjoy the pure awkwardness of seeing Stephen Merchant try to perform being a Regular Person, but ultimately this show tips him too far towards a nasty, Ricky Gervais-lite sort of persona. Perhaps he was always best as a cameo appearance, or lip synching with wild eyes while Chrissy Teigen giggles?

03 - Olive Kittredge - a rough watch by times. I read the book as well, later in the year. Frances Mcdormand was the best, possibly the only, casting option for the flinty lead. One episode tips into thriller territory, which is a shock. 

04 - *The Wire S3, S4, S5 - lockdown culture! It was interesting to rewatch this, then a few months later go through an enormous, culture-level reappraisal of cop-centred narratives. 

05 - Forever - a Maya Rudolph/Fred Armisen joint that coasts on the charm of its leads. The premise is OK, but I wasn’t left wanting any more at the end. 

06 - *Catastrophe - a rewatch when my partner decided he wanted to see it, too!

07 - Red Oak - resolutely “OK” steaming dramedy, relied heavily on some pretty obvious cues to get across its 1980s setting. 

08 - Little Fires Everywhere - gulped this one down while in 14-day isolation, delicious! Every 90s suburban mom had that SUV, but not all of them had the requisite **secrets**

09 - The Great - fun historical comedy/drama! Costumes: lush. Actors: amusing. Race-blind casting: refreshing!

10 - The Crown S4 - this is the season everyone lost their everloving shit for, since it’s finally recent enough history that a fair chunk of the viewing audience is liable to recall it happening. 

11 - Ted Lasso - we resisted this one for a while (thought I did enjoy the ad campaign for NBC sports (!!) that it was based on). My view is that its best point was the comfort that the men on the show have (or develop, throughout the season) with the acknowledgement and sharing of their own feelings. Masculinity redux. 

12 - Moonbase 8 - Goodnatured in a way that makes you certain they will be crushed. 

13 - The Good Lord Bird - Ethan Hawke is really aging into the character actor we always hoped he would be! 

14 - Hollywood - frothy wish-fulfillment alternate history. I think the show would have been improved immeasurably by skipping the final episode.

[goopyartiste]

20 Questions Tag Game

thank you @meliorist-midoriya and @deephasoceanmagic for tagging me in this! it was definitely fun to do! it just took such a long time 🤧

im tagging @peach-pops @kirislut @ordinary-ace @yee-harr @spookykiri and @isanuts ! have fun with this <3

1. what do you prefer to be called name-wise?

i like Isa a lot! its what im used to, but Izzie is fine as well <3

2. when is your birthday?

its January 26! 

3. where do you live?

Miami ⛱

4. three things you are doing right now?

those three things are writings some fics (three at once 🤧), stressing out over homework, and feeling crappy about my grades 😚✌🏼

5. four fandoms that have piqued your interest.

obviously currently its been my hero and haikyuu, but the percy jackson series was and will always be my life! the last fandom would have to be the harry potter fandom, though im not as active as i used to be with it 😅

6. how has the pandemic been treating you?

this pandemic has actually been pretty good to me, other than the fact that i haven’t been able to see my irls. ive taken the time to work on hobbies and my self confidence, although im still working on that myself. if it wasnt for this pandemic, i probably wouldnt have this blog, so im thankful for that at least 😊

7. a song you can’t stop listening to right now?

ugh, there’s like ten currently 😗. my top three though would have to be “hello hello hello” by Remi Wolf, “Levitating” by Dua Lipa, and finally “Afterglow” by The Driver Era.

8. recommend a movie.

AHHHH!! if you like mystery, or even if you dont, Knifes Out is a really good one! im not one for mystery (kind of hate them 😀) but this one is just amazing. and it only gets better with rewatches!

9. how old are you?

currently 16, but my 17th birthday is coming up  (oh my god im almost an adult 😐)

10. school, university, occupation, other?

high school baby 🤪, but i hate most of the classes im taking just because they are killing me <3

11. do you prefer heat or cold?

oh definitely the cold. at least with the cold, you could layer up and look cute. even with the least amount of layers, you’d still be hot 🧍🏻‍♀️

12. name one fact others may not know about you.

i used to do tae kwon do for like two months, but then i quit 🤸🏻‍♀️. the only move i remember is actually just the roundhouse kick :’)

13. are you shy?

haha yeah <3. im really shy when you first meet me, but once i get comfortable and get to know you better, then i am chaos incarnate. at least i think i am 😐

14. preferred pronouns?

she/her works just fine for me :)

15. biggest pet peeves?

biggest pet peeve huh? if im honest i’ve never really given it much thought, but slow walkers just... they annoy me sometimes.... like i get it you want to enjoy the scenery or you just dont like walking fast, but jeez dont take up the whole sidewalk then ;-;

16. what is your favorite “dere” type?

if we are talking about types i like, then most likely a bakadere (probably because i relate to them the most 🤧), but deredere is also a close second :P

17. rate your life from 1-10, 1 being crappy and 10 being the best it could be.

definitely feel as if my life is a solid 8. ive obviously had my rough patches, but its overall been a really happy life and ive learned to enjoy it 😊

18. what’s your main blog?

@goopyartiste or this blog!

19. list your side blogs and what they’re used for.

i dont have any and im too dummy to learn how to make any 🧍🏻‍♀️

20. is there something people need to know about you before becoming friends?

well, i do tend to overshare quite a bit.. also, i am VERY chaotic once i open up and get to know someone. also, self confidence is 📉📉 half the time, so i use humor to cope with it and anything bad, though i do know when to tone it down or just not say anything.

[lovely-little-loki]

Thank you @adreamer67 for tagging me! Sorry it took me so long to do this!

Tag 8 People You’d Like To Get To Know Better!

Favorite colors: Green. Dark, dark green where it's almost black. Another is burgundy. They're so comforting and remind me of fall which is my favorite season! I like teal and aqua too because they're so summery and uplifting!

Last song I listened to: According to spotify it's "Show Yourself" from Frozen 2. Ive been in a disney music kick lately.

Favorite musicians: P!ATD, Queen, Melanie Martinez, The Beatles

Last movie I watched: Ant Man. Not really watching it, had it on more as background, but I don't often sit and watch a movie

Favorite Character: Loki obvs. He's my babe. From my other favorite fandom (Harry Potter) my fav character is Draco Malfoy. (Do I have a type? Maybe??)

Last TV show: The Office. That show is on a constant loop in my house. I didn't even want to watch it the first time around, my brother and sister did! But now I think I could answer even the toughest trivia questions because of the amount of times we've gone through the show (it has to be at least 20-25 times and I'm not even exaggerating). It's just one of those things where it's like, "don't know what to watch, just put on the office!", "im tired, let's just put on the office", "I want something easy to watch, put on the office". It also doesn't help that my brother and I have anxiety so rewatching shows is a comfort for us.

Sweet, spicy, or savory? Depends on my mood, but usually sweet. I like savory and I like spicy (but not too spicy!!) but sweet is usually the winner

Sparkling water, tea, or coffee? NONE!! I tried sparkling water years ago (I think is was like 13/14??) and I was thinking it was just gonna be like regular water with a bit of fizz but OOOF WAS I WRONG. Gross, yuck, never again! Coffee is too bitter for me, I don't even like coffee flavored things like ice cream. Tea is not great either but I guess if I had to choose, itd be tea? I have the tastebuds of a 5 year old.

Pets: One bunny!

Tagging: @ironfamjam, @ratsats, and @loxxxlay

[justanalto]

quarantine tag game

i was tagged by @crazyrichfilipinos (hi and ty!) 

1. Are you staying home from work/school?

yup. no school, no temp assignments...just a big ole unemployment void. so this is what it’ll be like when i’m older. 

2. If you’re staying at home, who’s there with you?

the other three members of my family and the voices of everyone my mom calls on the daily. 

3. Do you have pets to keep you company?

no, and i really wish i had at least a hamster. a dog would be preferable. i’d even take a cat.

4. What do you miss the most?

i miss a lot of things. i think mainly i just miss having a sense of purpose? i got caught in the unemployment crossfire (without actually being able to file for unemployment welp) and everyone else in my house is learning online/working while i’m just kinda...floating around doing nothing. 

5. When was the last time you left your home?

march 14. i went to the gym and picked up some picture frames from ikea, and the next day began the stay-at-home advisory. the last time i physically left the house was about two weeks ago, when i went photographing, touched the ground and subsequently panicked about getting sick for the next week. (this was fueled by my mom’s reaction and i know she’s right but also still it’s a Lot)

6. What was the last thing you brought?

overcooked and overcooked 2 for steam baby! they were both on sale and i’ve just been playing with my friends. about to buy jackbox 5 tho cause it’s also on sale and might debut it at my possible zoom grad party.

7. Is quarantine driving you insane or are you finally relaxed?

i have never been less relaxed because literally every anxiety is in play every single moment of the day

8. Are you a homebody?

i used to be! then i went to college and all that stuff. home is a great base to touch in on every now and again, but being home requires me to take up a specific role that i’m not comfortable being in for the rest of my life. i also fell in love with travelling, so...no, I guess? i’m a homebody in the sense that I enjoy quiet nights in. but other than that let me out of here please i’m begging you

9. What are movies you have watched recently?

PORTRAIT OF A LADY ON FIRE. THE GAY. oh! and saving face, because bitches can’t WAIT for the half of it! it’s me. i’m bitches. 

my ultimate goal is to work through the list of movies i want to watch (snowpiercer, parasite, knives out, to all the boys 2, etc.) and then work my way back through the movies i haven’t seen in a long time (princess diaries 1 + 2, all three Lilo and Stitches, camp rock)

10. An event that you were looking forward to that got cancelled?

just...everything. commencement ball. commencements parts I-IV. the acapella concerts I was supposed to see my friends at because it was their last hurrah. the conference where I was supposed to present the thesis project that stripped me of my mental health during my last semester of college! my friend and I were supposed to go see AJR in may. we were all supposed to throw grad parties. class of 2020 really got gypped y’all. the start of a marketing position i’d just secured with a temp company. 

11. What’s the worst thing you’ve had to cancel?

probably commencement. it was supposed to be a last hurrah with my friends because I wouldn’t have hung out with them since i left uni the semester before. our crowning achievement, if you will. the defining moment that said yes, despite every piece of drama and every bit of trauma along the way, we made it and we’re ready to fuck up the world. the crowning glory. and now all of that’s been stripped away and instead, society’s just going to throw us into the dry pool called the job market. commencement was supposed to be the breath of air before we went back to trying to swim against a current. now it’s just a continuous struggle that won’t be made better because no one can retire. plus the market, which is normally fucked for creatives, is going to be extra fucked because no company has ‘money’.  

12. What’s the best thing you’ve had to cancel?

uhhhh...i mean i guess when you put it that way, it would be the research conference. i was not ready to turn my brain back into academic mode. 

13. Do you have any new hobbies?

not new hobbies per se...just re-picked up a lot of old ones? knitting, writing, photography. folding stars. all sort of muscle memory things you can do while binge-watching TV. i’m in the process of making jars of little stars for my senior friends because they’re ‘senior stars’! cue ‘we’re all in this together’. 

but in all seriousness (and cheesiness, sorry guys) i wanted to make them something that was decorative and cute and reminded them that they were important. like stars. and just as like. a present. ‘cause they deserve that. 

14. What are you out of?

serotonin, dopamine and a will to live, almost. i’m so tired y’all.

15. What music are you listening too?

mostly my current music playlist, but i’m trolling my friends’ playlists too. i am repeating “complicated” from sex&drugs&rock&roll, though, mainly because i’m resonating with it so deeply to the point where i want to cry. and am unable to. as one does.

16. What shows are you watching?

a lot of the shows i watch ended production early so that’s really no more for grey’s...ok basically just grey’s ended early but i’m still watching 9-1-1 because they’re still producing regularly. b99 is too but I think they’re just about to wrap up. i’ve been meaning to start the recent season of odaat but i’ve just been watching the old episodes on netflix because idt we can get poptv. 

i started rewatching victorious, i’m at a pause with dynasty and sex&drugs&rock&roll mainly because of formatting. does anyone have any tv recs? 

17. What are you reading?

i’ve been meaning to start into the interior by michelle cliff, and after that i’d really like to re-read ‘i hate everyone but you’ by gaby dunn and allison raskin. i’d like more gay books tho.

18. What are you doing for self care?

watching a lot of the try guys. in the middle of trying to reset my sleeping clock tho.

19. Are you exercising?

i....am. mainly because not exercising makes me feel worse about myself and i can already sense the hell i’m going to catch if I don’t look good for my cousin’s wedding. (we’re gonna assume it happens.) 

20. How’s your toilet paper supply?

when we first started this whole thing, i looked in the basement and uh...let’s just say we’re gonna be pretty okay for a while. still hasn’t stopped me from monitoring my sheet usage though.

21. Have you made any changes to your hair during quarantine?

i cut my hair short just before quarantine, actually! so i’ve sort of been revelling in that. if this goes on for a while longer i might trim it myself, just because i would rather stay short than go long again for the sake of my own sanity. 

tagging: @agentmmayy @peacequack @lalalyds2 @the-writer-girl-nerd and anyone else that feels like doing this lovely quarantine tag or is slowly trying not to go insane

[rqs902]

qcyn ep 11 -- can you believe the finale is tomorrow?!?

this whole texting section was so funnyyyy and i will honorably mention yet again that yao chi texting mc jin in english is so sweet

li ronghao torturing xu longhan iS HIALRIOSUS 

 but i also pity the poor child LOOL

wait can we talk about chen tao’s spelling timao LOL

and chen sijian’s face LOLLL

omg yao mingming’s message is so aww... he mentions liking yixing since he debuted in 2012.......

omgggg fjj and wang yi theyre all so cute and screamy and i loveee 

WAIT CAN WE TALK ABOUT LIN MO AND WANG YI’S HAPPY DANCE

oh gosh the8 is really showing us how hard seventeen works to get their choreo super in sync wow they really must work so hard.... wow minghao giving up the center position bc he knows how important this is to these kids... he deserves more recognition as a great mentor wow

oh my goodness.......... li zhenning’s voice shaking as he says to shi mingze “if you can get into top 20, then you’ll have hope” is.... the most heartbreaking......... knowing that shi mingze doesnt.......... they literally were smiling as they went off into this corner to talk and are crying by the time they come out..... can you just imagine how much sadness and stress is constantly looming over these kids’ heads and tearing down at their mental health?? its all hidden and suppressed, but with really fragile borders, so as soon as you pick at the walls, their raw emotions come bursting through... 

this just reminds me that even tho shi mingze is their cool, handsome leader, hes still the youngest in bg project............

can we please talk about how considerate of a friend li zhenning is and has been?? 

and this all took place before zhenning ever ranked into top 9.... so to them, this opportunity wouldve been really important for zhenning too, bc maybe he wouldve really needed it to get into top 9. but at least we know now.... he has enough popularity that they made the correct choice and hopefully more people will notice shi mingze as a result

ZHAN YU’S ARMSSSSSSSSS bo yuan’s hair!! i really like it!!!! wen yechen in pink!!!!!! his voice is so addicting i just wanna hear more of it... it dont matter that zhenning isnt center, he still shines :)) wait wu zelin’s voice i really liked it in retreat and we get even more vocal-like wu zelin here! thats a realy nice purple on qunfeng, hes really rocking this look SHI MINGZE I SAW THAT WINK frick minghao’s dancing is just so satisfying to watch wowow

man he looks so good

wow i live for random zhan yu reactions (imma just collect them here LOL)

after journey and mc jin’s friendship is so cute hahahaha

ok i see why elle thinks chen tao is a visual

wang zhe and wu chengze have both really improved in their stage presence throughout the course of this show aw deng chaoyuan looks the happiest we’ve ever seen him on stage haha zhou shiyuan’s voice is really so cool 

i guess we’ll never find out why gu landi is in mc jin’s group..... is it bc yao chi is here? im sorry i love this song and i love a lot of the kids in this group but can you just imagine how much better this stage would’ve been if it were with more kids who had experience rapping....? last year’s “zero” stage just made such a bigger impression on me...... this is actually really such a contrast im---

ALKSJDLAKSJDLK CHEN SIJIAN’S RAPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HE JUST DID THATT!!!!!!!!!! DID YOU SEE THAT!??!?!1//!ASDLKJALSKJJ OMGGOHS AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!! CHEN SIJIAN JUST BLEW EVERYOEN OUT OF THE WATER YOU BEST BET HE DID WOWOW HE JSUT I CANT BELEIEVE HE JSUT INCLUDED AT LEAST 4 NAMES WOW 

IM WEN YECHEN

chen sijian is really the best at writing raps about his bros wow and like also he has the most creative lyrics i really appreciate wow such talent hes amazing!!!

a lost baby..

UNDERAPPRECIATED GU LANDI VISUALS

the face of a legend 

ever since i saw the “time” ballad version, ive had a sneaking suspicion that lin yuzhi is secretly one of the strongest vocalists on this show..... this is the face of talent

idk whose outfit is distracting me more, xu bingchao or xixi’s LOL shao haofan looks so nice here wow and ding feijun is so adorable even tho this is a more mature concept but i still cant see him as anything but a cute child

maybe its the way they cut up the lines but idk this song didnt really show off their vocal abilities that well..... sorry xixi :( i think xixi’s voice deserved better time to shine on this show...... his and feng junjie’s voices are actually both so nice i was so impressed when i saw them singing in the oaca clips

this koala ad makes me very uncomfortable......

wenhan reaches into the box and pulls out..... costco brand blueberries??!?!?/1 hHhahahhahHAHAHHA 

lol yao chi being so sentimental... oh look at this photo of me with bubbles on my face (me: oh no here it come--) OH YEA ALSO CHECK OUT THIS FACE WASH!

wow kou cong!! a face i havent seen in a while aw! i cant believe they filmed all the yaa eps while they all still had colorful hair lol i guess ill never get to see lin mo on yaa /sigh/ or actually any of the tyger members cept jia yi.........

HAHAHAHAHHA YESSSSSSSSS THEY INCLUDED A CLIP OF CHEN SIJIAN’S PHONE CALL !!!! HIS WAS HILARIOUSS!!!! HAHAHAHA I LOVED HOW SIMILAR HIS FAN SEEMED TO BE TO HIM HAHAH 

AAHH AS SOON AS IT GETS TO LIN MO’S ITS THE SAD MUSIC TIME

his was the most heartwarming call.... no bias LOL

feng junjie singing “the great artist” just---

this boy will never stop with the meme faces hHAHAHA

im surprised this section was so short lol i was expecting them to spend more time on this group...

SUN ZELIN SUN ZELIN SUN ZELIN YEA

jolin’s eyes are so wow 

feng junjie with the voice!!!!!!1 

JOLIN THE QUEEN

still kinda wish jia yi had more opportunity to sing on this show......... hes like second main vocalist to zhan yu in tyger but i feel like he hasnt gotten to show his voice much :( he did really well tho!!! he really has impressive stage presence

omg lin mo’s super shy “1 day” ahhhhh 

omg wang jiayi looks like hes about to cry... the poor child....

yixing reaching out to apologize to them.... hes really so caring towards them...... wang jiayi just needs more confidence!! i believe in him too

where did lin mo get this white cap from? lol he chose the pink one..... on a related note, im so happy lin mo got to be in yixing’s group, bc from the beginning with namanana hes really really tried so hard to earn yixing’s recognition, im sure it means a lot to him to be able to learn from him like this and share a stage with him 

yao mingming too, i feel like he really values yixing’s recognition as well

i think all the kids in this group had to have known that picking yixing’s group would be the most tiring and require the most effort, but i think choosing this group regardless just really shows they came here to learn 

A HAPPY BABYYY

omg like yixing is really /teaching/ them and i appreciate that

lin mo and xu fangzhou’s voices!!!!!!

OOF IM SO READY FOR THIS OUTFIT 

ASLDKALSDKJLAK HE WINKED!!!!!!!!!!!

what is this awkward closeup

why does fangzhou have wings lol

i feel like theres a lot of random awkward closeups of lin mo.... should i be happy about this??? LOL i dont think theyre all very flattering but at the same time at least hes got closeups....???? ? ??  

OOF HES GETTING MORE LINES THAN I EXPECTED TOO

you know how ive talked about how i love how much detail lin mo puts into his dancing, including even his slight head tilts? LOOK ANOTHER HEAD TILT 

HAHAHAHHAHA GUAN YUE’S EYES GOT SO BIG HAHAHHAHA OMGGG

ooof lin mo getting to sing the chorus with yixing im !!!!!! im sure hes so grateful for this opportunity wow also i think i mentioned this with namanana but i really think lin mo suits yixing’s dance style, like its a style that hes pulls off really well, so i think he got to shine a bit in this performance :’)

ok i havent said this yet but what is with that thick black fade at the top of the screen its so annoying??? like why you gotta cover the top of their heads??? 

wow we’re really getting a lot of random lin mo shots hahahha is this iqiyi repenting their wrongs from ‘spirit of the knight’ i almost am surprised how yao mingming isnt getting the most screentime but then i remember iqiyi has never favored yao mingming........ /sigh

AYYY WENXUAN AND LIN MO THE BUDDIES

just look at how perfectly tilted / well-positioned lin mo’s head is wow and that gaze wow i just love his stage presence

yea im gonna have to rewatch this perf to gif the lin mo moments.... maybe after the finale tomorrow when ill be like oop lin mo didnt make it in oh well let me just wallow in his talent that the audience slept on by drowning myself in lin mo content (its not like i do that every day already)

LOL THAT CAMERA SPIN WAS SUCH A FAIL YOU CANT SEE ANYONE CEPT WENXUAN ADJUSTING HIS MIC HAHAHHAHA ok on a side note tho im glad wenxuan got to be in this group too!! yuehua’s dancer getting to show us his dancing again :’) and we all know he was discouraged being reshuffled into “maze” and i just wanna say wenxuan deserves more credit for being able to really go out of his comfort zone and pull off the cute concept in “maze” well even tho he didnt want to accept it at first! 

HES PERFECT 

hey yall is it just me or did you see lin mo’s eyes in that really fast flashy bit at the end of the preview for the finale? HAHHAHAHA i couldnt even screenshot it bc it was so fast, but i swear i saw his eyes so i think he was in it LOOOL

JSUT KIDDING I WENT BACK AND TRIED AGAIN AND I GOT IT

I KNEW I SAW HIS EYES HAHAHAHHAHA

oo i havent mentioned this before but i really like the sound of chen sijians voice, even when speaking... 

OMG GU LANDI

OMGGGG MY CHILD YE ZIMING IN FREAKING TARZAN NEXT DOOR??!???

THIS IS TOO MUCH!!!!!!! THANKS FOR REMINDING US HOW IQIYI TOTALLY SLIGHTED THIS BOY OUT OF GETTING INTO TOP 35

aw honestly i wonder if lian huaiwei will really not make it tomorrow.....  

omg sun zelin in the ending credits!!!!

OMG ZHAN YU TOOOOOOO

OOF LOOK AT ZHAN YU’S JAWLINE (ooops sorry yechen ahhahhhaa)

they must really like this part of the choreo?? 

BUT I LOVE THIS LOOK ON YECHEN YESSS

lol is this lin mo’s back

tbh im surprised they didnt include lin mo in the ending credits but i think they were trying to make up for the loss of yao mingming time earlier LOOL 

ok well i have about 10 hrs until i gotta wake up to watch the finale so.... now to go watch fjj and hcx’s goodnight dachang HAHAH

[marshmallow-the-vampire-slayer]

MTVS Epic Rewatch #208

Don’t forget to vote on the season 7 polls!!

BTVS 7x21 End of Days

Stray thoughts

1) So this is how Faith is doing as the leader…

…and this is how Buffy is doing as the outcast Slayer…

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm I wonder who’s the boss… (maybe we should ask Abed.)

2) I don’t like seeing Faith hurt, but I do get a very sick (I admit it) satisfaction at seeing all these girls hurt and scared because they kicked Buffy out and they screwed everything up in the worst possible fashion. I know that by having Faith lead them into yet another trap the writers were trying to prove the point that what happened at the vineyard could’ve happened to anyone and that it wasn’t Buffy’s fault (Buffy will make this same point herself later on the episode.) Both Buffy and Faith were trying to do what they thought was best, yet it backfired. Shit happens yada yada yada. Yet I just can’t help but feel personally vindicated when I see Faith and the potentials fuck everything up so spectacularly.

On the other hand, not only was Buffy able to pull herself together after the group (and her friends! Her family!) kicked her out and made her feel like the worst piece of shit in the whole world, but she also managed to A) get the scythe and B) make Caleb nervous, which was a first. So yeah. #teamBuffy

3) So why exactly were the Scoobies looking for Buffy? I mean, didn’t they kick her out literally the day before? And now they’re suddenly worried about her or something? The only person who followed Buffy after they all kicked her out was Faith. Faith! Do you see how wrong/ironic that this? Do you see how painful it must’ve been for Buffy not to have NONE OF HER FRIENDS – not Xander, not Willow, not Giles, not even her own sister! – go after her to see if she was okay? To ask her where she was going or what she was going to do? The only person who showed any concern whatsoever about her was probably the only person she would’ve labeled a potential enemy. 

Damn you all, I’m still pissed off. I hate this. I hate having to feel this way about the characters I’ve loved for seven seasons in the FINAL EPISODES OF THE SHOW. It just feels so wrong, but I can’t help but HATE THEM. What the hell was this fucking writing choice? I hate it. I hate everything about it.

4) If I have to say something in favor of Kennedy is this, when shit hit the fan, she was the only one who wasn’t screaming like a moron and who was actually trying to fight off the Turok-Han. So yeah. The girl got spunk.

5) But she’s nothing compared to our designated BAMF.

6) No one is kicking Buffy out now, HUH? HUH???????????????????

7)

Yes. Yes, you did.

8) And this is exactly why they shouldn’t have kicked her out or “rebelled” against her or whatever the fuck they thought they were doing.

BUFFY You guys, it was a trap. It's not her fault. That could've just as easily happened to me.

9) While I do appreciate the pun and the side glances between Buffy and Willow…

I still feel it’s very wrong they’re all just talking and Giles is playing around with the scythe as if the last time they’d been together they HADN’T HUMILIATED BUFFY AND KICKED HER OUT OF HER OWN FUCKING HOUSE???? LIKE SERIOUSLY??? In Willow’s own words, you're not gonna jokey-rhyme your way out of this one.

Like, I know the apocalypse takes precedence, but maybe say “sorry for kicking you out” and “thank you for saving us AGAIN”.

10)

11) Again, I get the same feeling with Xander. Like, did they all suddenly forget they had left Buffy alone and kicked her out of her own house? Xander is all like, “I don’t need you to protect me just because I lost an eye” but literally a day before he was telling her it was HER fault he’d lost it, and using that as a justification not only for removing her from her role as a leader but also TO KICK HER OUT OF HER OWN HOUSE. And now it’s just like nothing ever happened? How is that possible? How is literally no one apologizing to Buffy? And not only is he not apologizing, but Buffy is telling him that he’s her heart and the reason she’s still alive, which okay, it’s all kind of true, but he’s also the guy WHO BLAMED YOU FOR LOSING HIS EYE AND WHO KICKED YOU OUT OF YOUR OWN HOUSE THE DAY BEFORE?!

I didn’t know that End of Days could make me as angry as Empty Places but here I am.

We’re 14 minutes into the episode and still, no one has apologized to Buffy and they’re all pretending like they didn’t turn their backs on her and it’s pissing me off. I hate feeling this way in the episode prior to the series finale. This is not how a fan should be feeling right before the show ends!

12) Not only do I know what a glottal stop is but I’ve also learned how to pronounce it. Or at least I was able to pronounce it a few years ago. 

13) And hence the fate of Miss Kitty Fantastico was finally revealed…

DAWN Xander, my crossbow is not out here. I told you, I don't leave crossbows around all willy-nilly. Not since that time with Miss Kitty Fantastico.

If you must hate Dawn, it should only be for this.

14) Did anyone really believe Xander would hurt Dawn?

15) What was the point of this scene…?

…I mean, other than to give us Nathan Fillion’s orgasm face?

16) And this is the difference between Buffy and the rest… just remember how everyone reacted and treated Buffy after the vineyard, and see how she acts here after literally the same happened with Faith in charge…

FAITH What do you want me to say? I blew it.

BUFFY You didn't blow it.

FAITH Tell that to—

BUFFY People die. You lead them into battle, they're gonna die. It doesn't matter how ready you are or how smart you are. War is about death. Needless, stupid death.

She’s understanding and reassuring, she’s not pointing fingers or kicking people out. And that’s why she’s a hero and the rest are a fucking bunch of morons. I’m sorry, I’m still so angry about Empty Places and this episode is not making things any better.

17) But I do love when my two slayers see eye to eye…

FAITH So, here's the laugh riot. My whole life I've been a loner.(…) No ties, no buddies, no relationships that lasted longer than... (…) Me, by myself all the time. I'm looking at you, everything you have, and, I don't know, jealous. Then there I am. Everybody's looking to me, trusting me to lead them, and I've never felt so alone in my entire life.

BUFFY Yeah.

FAITH And that's you every day, isn't it?

BUFFY I love my friends. I'm very grateful for them. But that's the price. Being a slayer.

FAITH There's only supposed to be one. Maybe that's why you and I can never get along. We're not supposed to exist together.

BUFFY Also, you went evil and were killing people.

FAITH Good point. Also a factor.

BUFFY But you're right. I mean, I... I guess everyone's alone. But being a slayer? There's a burden we can't share.

FAITH And no one else can feel it. Thank God we're hot chicks with superpowers.

BUFFY Takes the edge off.

FAITH Comforting.

BUFFY Mm-hmm.

This is something that had been a long time coming. Since day one, Faith had envied Buffy. Just like Buffy saw in Faith her road not taken, Faith saw in Buffy the life she could’ve had but didn’t. She envied it and she wanted it for herself. She literally tried to steal it away several times. So if she couldn’t have it, if it wasn’t meant for her, then she could take Buffy away from it, drive her to the dark side, where she lived. Every attempt was futile, even stealing Buffy’s body and literally taking her life. It only made her feel more undeserving, more inadequate, more unworthy. But every time she’d taken a shot at being the leader, it was by playing tricks, by taking what it wasn’t rightfully hers. This time around, she had somehow earned it. There was no foul play on her part. Others made the decision for her and gave her the role she’d craved for so long. And she finally understood that it wasn’t all it was cracked up to be. Yes, Buffy did have friends and people who looked up to her and cared about her. But when push comes to shove, when tough calls must be made, the Slayer is always alone. The weight of the world is only on her shoulders, and she can’t share the burden. It took four seasons but Faith finally got it. And she could finally let go of all the envy and jealousy.

18) I just love the fact that for the first time Buffy is the one who opens up to Spike. She’s always been the one who pretends there’s nothing between them and who skirts around her feelings and dismisses his. But not this time. And for me, it was enough that she acknowledged that it meant something, even if they – and we – don’t know exactly what that was.

BUFFY You're a dope.

SPIKE I'm a what?

BUFFY You're a dope. And a bonehead. And you're shirty.

SPIKE Have you gone completely carrot-top?

BUFFY Do you see this? This may actually help me fight my war. This might be the key to everything. And the reason I'm holding it is because of you. Because of the strength that you gave me last night. Look, I am tired of defensiveness and weird, mixed signals. You know, I have Faith for that. Let's just get to the truth here, OK? I don't know how you felt about last night, but I will not—

SPIKE Terrified.

BUFFY Of what?

SPIKE Last night was... God, I'm such a jerk. I can't do this.

BUFFY Spike...

SPIKE It was the best night of my life. If you poke fun at me, you bloody well better use that, 'cause I couldn't bear it. It may not mean that much to you, but—

BUFFY I just told you it did.

SPIKE Yeah... I hear you say it, but... I've lived for soddin' ever, Buffy. I've done everything. Done things with you I can't spell, but... I've never... been close... to anyone. Least of all, you. 'Til last night. All I did was... hold you, watch you sleep. And it was the best night of my life. So, yeah... I'm... terrified.

BUFFY You don't have to be.

SPIKE Were you there with me?

BUFFY I was.

SPIKE What does that mean?

BUFFY I don't know. Does it have to mean something?

SPIKE No. Not right now.

19) Update: 29 minutes in and I’m still waiting for someone to apologize to Buffy.

20) Am I the only who thinks this speech is okay but like, the writers were trying too hard to give Anya her “Anya Speech Moment” of the season and it kind of feels a bit, I don’t know, forced?

ANYA Well...I guess I was...kinda new to bein' around humans before. But now I've... seen a lot more, gotten to know people... seen what they're capable of, and... I guess I just realized...how amazingly screwed-up they all are. I mean really, really screwed-up in a monumental fashion. And they have no purpose that unites them, so they just drift around, blundering through life until they die...which they...they know is coming, yet every single one of them is surprised when it happens to them. They're incapable of thinking about what they want beyond the moment. They kill each other, which is clearly insane. And yet, here's the thing. When it's something that really matters, they fight. I mean, they're lame morons for fighting, but they do. They never... never quit. So I guess I will keep fighting, too.

21) #priorities

22) And in another episode of Plots Totally Pulled Out of the Writer’s Ass… (a.k.a. Joss Whedon Tries to Rectify the Fact that He Wrote a Bunch of Men Violating the Original Slayer by Putting a Demon Inside of Her and Thus Utterly Destroyed the Whole Slayerness Equals Feminism Theme)

WOMAN We forged it in secrecy and kept it hidden from the Shadow Men, who...

BUFFY Yeah. Met those guys. Didn't really care too much for 'em.

WOMAN Ahh, yes. Then you know. And they became the watchers. And the watchers watched the slayers. But we were watching them.

BUFFY Oh! So you're like... what are you?

WOMAN Guardians. Women who want to help and protect you. We forged this centuries ago, halfway around the world.

Okay, I get it, I get what you were trying to do, but it was so fucking obvious, it was so transparent. Like, I know most of the so-called metaphors in this show were not so subtle (think the fucking monster-penis in Doublemeat Palace, for instance.) But the feminist struggle in the slayer vs the council struggle was always something that I personally enjoyed. And this is how Joss’s brand of “feminism” began to crumble down, in my opinion. This is what a white dude who is a self-proclaimed feminist believes to be a Good feminist storyline, but it’s so clichéd and self-evident it's almost cringe-worthy. Like, you get a bunch of Evil Men quite literally raping a Poor Woman, who is faked Empowered (her powers were lent to her by the Evil Men and the source of her powers is Evil, Demonic in nature because  duh! she is a Woman)  so that they can Manipulate her and Use her for the benefit of the Patriarchy. But oh wait! This is a Feminist Show! So in spite of what the Evil Men who were supposedly the Powerful ones did, there always were These Great and Powerful Women behind it all, the True Guardians of the Slayer, This has been a Matriarchy all along, you see?! PLOT TWIST!

Yawn.

The worst part? I can imagine all the writers patting themselves on the back for writing such a groundbreaking and Feminist storyline and for sticking it to the Men.

23) And btw, just to show you how big a Feminist Show this is, we get this…

I guess since this is a Feminist Show and Angel is the hero here and Buffy the damsel in distress, that makes Angel a woman, right?

But hey, at least he (or she?) literally let Buffy deliver the lethal blow…

24) And yes, this totally makes sense!

because Angel has not claimed to be in love with Cordelia and Buffy has not just had her more honest heart-toheart with Spike. Let’s just disregard whatever arcs have been developed in both shows in order to deliver a Ship Moment for the Bangel fans, right? Who cares about character development, right? Because I’m positive this is what former lovers do after not seeing each other in over a year, being currently emotionally unavailable, and facing the greatest evil of all. Suck face.

25) Update: minute 42 and I’m STILL waiting for someone to apologize to Buffy.

26) Sorry for the bitter rant! 

27)  If you’ve got this far, thank you for reading! If you enjoy my recaps and my blog, please consider supporting it on ko-fi. Thanks!

[mithrilbeard]

30 questions

I got tagged by @gay-pippin and i keep forgetting to do this so let’s go boys

1. How tall are you?

like 5′5 (165.1 cm). i am a little man ok.

2. What color and style is your hair?

i am a natural red head and most would call my hair a pixie cut but i just say it’s short. but if you want a mental image, when my hair gets too long, i look like an auburn haired ringo starr

3. What color are your eyes?

dark brown and i donut like it. i prefer light eyes even tho every other brown eyed person pulls them off

4. Do you wear glasses?

no but i probably should. i don’t see too hot at a distance, especially with just my right eye

5. Do you wear braces?

my teeth are jank but no i don’t

6. What’s your fashion sense?

hot mess; always in jeans and my doc martens but the shirt is a surprise and usually i never match. also there’s a 97% chance i’m wearing either dog or reptar socks

7. Full name?

preferably, castiel rudy [REDACTED]

8. Where were you born?

i’m never comfortable sharing places but know it’s like 30-35 minutes from daytona (i’m unfortunately from florida)

9. Where are you from and where do you live now?

born and raised in florida and i live like 15 minutes from daytona 

10. What school do you go to?

a high school 5 minutes from the beach

11. What kind of student are/were you?

i’m kind of a kiss up sometimes? but i think my teachers like me and think i work hard?? it’s questionable

12. Do you like school?

yes, but at the same time i hate the mundane routine and the stress. i won’t open that can of worms or i’ll start an ethics debate with myself

13. Favorite school subject(s)?

art definitely, science, history, and surprisingly english

14. Favorite TV show(s)?

(i always blank out with these questions) everything sucks!, sex education, brooklyn 99, parks and rec, star trek tos, the good place, etc.

15. Favorite movie(s)?

the hobbit trilogy, prince of egypt, the road to el dorado, monty python and the holy grail, star trek II-IV (wrath of khan through voyage home), thor ragnoral, etc.

16. Favorite book(s)?

the hobbit, lotr trilogy (two towers was my favorite), be more chill, etc. i’m in the middle of pride and prejudice rn

17. Favorite pastime?

catching up on sleeping. besides that, drawing or reading

18. Do you have any regrets?

being born and far too many other things

19. Dream job?

being an artist and living in the english countryside 

20. Would you ever like to be married?

the thought of legal binding scares me but at the same time i want the ability to yell “!!!THAT’S MY WIFE!!!”

21. Would you like to have kids?

animal kids, yes

22. How many?

at least two dogs, a gecko, a cat, and others

23. Do you like shopping?

depends. i’m certainly better about it than i used to be tho. i hated clothes shopping for the longest time. if i need smth, i’m typically hesitantly but i usually find things i like so

24. What countries have you visited?

none yet unfortunately (i’ve only ever been out of state) but hopefully for my graduation gift we go to europe

25. Scariest nightmare?

existence + being in my head 

26. Any enemies?

probably unbeknownst to me

27. Do you have a significant other?

@waluigeez is my wife

28. Do you get along with your family?

with my mom and her side of the family, yeah. my dad is a whole different story

29. Do you believe in miracles?

sort of? mostly just when the universe decides whether or not to be cruel

30. How are you?

i’m aight. i’m cold and [tmi] kinda have to pee but otherwise, i’m fine. i’m planning on rewatching megamind because it’s a good movie and makes life better

i’m breaking a rule and not tagging anyone because i don’t want to be annoying & i don’t pay attention to who has or hasn’t done it 

but have a nice evening/morning/day @ everyone!!

[startwithbrooklyn]

THE GREAT ND REWATCH OF 2021 / OCTOBER 5, 2019 // return of josh

oooookay folks! that's a wrap! below are my comments about tonight's ep + additional expansions on previously stated opinions. i'm not combining s2 ep 1 with this bc s2 is dead to me! so is s3! i only did this to gather up all these loose thoughts i had when this show with its one lonely season became such a comfort to me that i developed a second consciousness about it. but with these posts i am done! the evil is defeated! i will carry on through the 3rd and hopefully final season of nancy drew with less emotion and better spirits. thank god.

-"talk to owen" nancy firstly thinks of talking to owen only to see what happens w the agleaca; saying goodbye comes as sorta an afterthought mirroring tiffany's possession of george. yet nancy was unable to say goodbe to owen just like w kate. knowing this reveal about kate, i wonder if this was foreshadowing that something big will be revealed about him later? unlikely but still

-nancy + the reality of broken things: 'totems' like broken sand glass sculpture (good place) to show you it's not a dream; "owen broke that" ghost trap to ground him to reality, like how she reached for her locket in the good place, lucy's charm, ace's bear ('totems' idea borrowed from inception)

-george has never been an affectionate person, even with other women- so why does pda with nick suddenly become so important?

-lots of comments about ryan + women but what about carson/kate and karen? again with the hypocritical (interestingly, there is an aspect of violence to women connected with ryan (even though that violence is not his fault); but its not like kate or karen fared well either)

-ryan feels useless- relationships with women as stated by nancy- he seeks to redeem himself by showing up where nancy goes to prove he is good to have around/necessary/needed - but now that he is attempting to act as a parent he has to break through nancy's defenses all over again- firstly she didnt really consider him any kind of threat bc he comes off as incompetent- ie bad business deals- i think i mentioned last ep, their hauntings equalize them as they both attempt to gain peace by searching for answers but now ryan has changed the terms of engagement so he's back to square one, with carson. (which is how we find them s2 cowering in ryans car stalking nancy together)

-ryan's relationship to nancy exposes an interesting layer here. so far she doesnt know about nick/george but they still hold the cards (ie george gets one over on nick's ex/"the new girl") with the revelation of ryan being nancys father, nancy gains an interesting trump card in navigating the social fallout of being nick's ex. like george would take the new spot but then nancy comes out with george's ex in a much higher category. this plays out later on in the ep when george confronts ryan. george wants to talk about "them" but ryan shows up completely focused on nancy, thus illustrating the trump

-"i thought it was whitney with another insipid question" to me this sounds like whitney took bess's advice earlier about "asking aunt diana what she wants" (only to learn it actually annoyed the hell out of diana lmaoo)

-"then you need to fight for it" this hearkens nancy earlier by asking "arent you in by virtue of dna?" the test was positive; she is a marvin just like nancy is a hudson. thats not a fact that they can change. however, diana really acts like it can be changed- and in s2 we see it does change. its interesting for bess to be told to fight to be in a family she's already in and also foiled by nancy trying to fight her way out of her own family. would like to see bess stand up to diana and say something. i mean, she exists. as much as she may want to erase bess from the family, diana cannot erase her existence

-hannah's rolled up sleeves 💙

-"previous keepers records" -from s2- were those not her parents??

-mistaken murderers- everyone incorrectly assumes lucy was murdered just as they assume the agleaca killed owen

-even if owen weren't the price, how can they pay the toll without one of the people who called? i mean if it was anything other than owen and he still died they still wouldve been fucked

-"you don't need to check, i'm not even driving!" okay and giving up the goss. cassidy is me. lmfaoooo

-wonder if this locked marvin industries box will ever come back

-UNPOPULAR OPINION: george's confrontation with ryan comes waytoo late to do anything. i think i brought this up in an earlier post. its literally just her screaming at him now. like he is clocked out moved on. you know a good time for this scene? in the claw when he comes by to "check on her". hes vulnerable, fresh from rehab. and she has a chit over him for punching bookcases/the fuckin country club deal. therewould have been a perfect time to confront ryan on what happened- "what you did to me" okay sis. you admitted ep 1 you werent in hs anymore. youre of age now. admit you fucked up. take the L to force him to swallow the bigger L. and imagine how much more powerful the scene would have been- in george's domain, literally her own office, something ryan doesnt even have because HE DOESNT DO SHIT. ryan is SO EASY to trap but nobody notices. instead they have george try to get some kind of apology out of him when hes already done with that, and only for the sake of her establishing a new relaionship to boot. imagine how much more empowered she would feel if she just got that closure for herself- because she needed it, not so she could trot straight back to nick being all proud of calling a grown man to some random estate only to scream at him in a parking lot and have accomplished nothing. 🤦🏼‍♀️

-i get patrice thinking nancy is lucy but yeahhhhh this isnt how dementia works 😬

-i almost cant with nance and josh. how do you save your would-be murderer? (+ lucy's best friend and brother are in jail, her mom is lost to her mentally; all she has left is nancy and ryan)

-tbh i had no idea how to spell agleaca until bess said "theres no i in agleaca!" i thought it was igleaka like 😂

-damn how george just stares at nicks hand and then gets out herself is just so sad (like she immediately rectifies it but still...)

-"curiosity" part II; nancy who comes back to the sea after her mother died in it- agleaca drawn to lucy's trauma/to agleaca, lucy died fir "love"- would nancy be willing to risk the same? // this is also one of nancy's "mirroring mom" moments: winning sea queen, going to the velvet masque, getting caught by celia, having a "chat" with everett, and "falling" off the bluffs

-the collector 🎵👌🏻

-i wonder if there's any significance to the locations/means of their deaths; nancy's is pretty straight forward in terms of where and how, but why george and nick drowning, in the truck specifically? drowning in love? idk. ace's at the claw i get, but he gets himself caught? in what precisely? what does the fish hook mean? and bess's makes the least sense- burning alive? in the marvin estate? maybe the agleaca picked the most painful death for the marvin blood relation? idk. up for debate lmk ya thoughts

and lastly:

-i remember seeing this ending for the first time and i had just been traumatized by avengers endgame and since black widow is also a redhead seeing that shit at the bottom of the cliff it was like 😰😰😰 TOO SOON

-random thoughts-

these are just things i noticed, feel free to grapple with them or take note of them for extrapolation in s3 (lord knows i wont be) they probably belonged in recaps for previous eps but i either didnt find them in my notebook or couldnt fit them in

•nancy and truth/the perception of truth: using facts to suit theories instead of creating theories to suit facts- nancy often plays with the perception of truth and the details that fall between the steps; but she is also a victim to them by people who also know how to play the game (ie Carson) ex lying about the dress (tea cups and knives, trash got picked up, bail paid 1 hr ago) her inferences can be off from what others tell her ("people always lie") but she can also come to the wrong conclusions organically (carsons trial) more willing to believe the best in others/wanting them to be innocent (think nick ep 1) but later finding out the truths hurts more so she chooses to isolate herself and avoid involving others to be spared pain

•maybe i'm dumb, but who is "mr marvin" exactly? owen? the bald guy from the funeral? this comes from the guy who takes sailboats out like ep 4ish and says "ive worked for the marvins 20 years" she compliments the ship, he says "mr marvin and i just took her out this morning" so?? who is that? plus last ep just saying cassidy and isaac are her "late husbands children" dows thet mean sebastian? like did diana marry in? i feel like it would be odd for her to so embrace the "marvin way" if she wasnt a true born marvin

•ik college becomes a more s2 topic but none of the crew have ever been to college 🤔

•nick + the relationships with people whose reputations are tarnished: tiffany with investigating the hudsons/marvins, josh with murder/attempted murder, kate and 'stealing'/lying about nancy (esp compared to her almost preternatural kindness i mentioned before), george and her mom/family's reputations --> this kind of segues into nick + the concept of believing people you love could be capable of horrific things- accidental or on purpose (see- having to tell his family what happened)

•at the beginning, nancy kind of seems to be the "i'm sorry you're upset" kind of apologist and knows it. she also doesnt usually apologize earnestly bc shes never really sorry (she always has to get what she needs first ie coins mess) and she doesnt want to lie; to me it seems she doesnt like to bother with other people bc they require certain cues/niceties that are often lies- they ask "how are you" without meaning it, they dont really want an honest response except "fine", they dont like it when you call them out on fakeness, etc/ they require apologies for their bruised feelings even if youre right (and nancy can be pretty rude/nasty if provoked- a harshness unsoftened by sympathy)

•cont'd from the good place ep- since kate apparently means nothing to nancy anymore according to last ep ("stop calling her my mother") is her policy of "always seek the truth" now null and void? this mantra is now tainted bc the person who gave it to her broke it so much. can nancy disengage w it now? does she fall from grace to be complicit in "mysteries" of her own like everyone else? does she lose some of her "god-like" holier than thou act bc she is now literally born and raised in the "darkness" of sins/ugly truths like everyone else's? (ie truth is ugly but not to nancy, until now)

•did lucy disappear because her "murder" was finally solved? or simply because her trauma was addressed- she never meant to tell anyone about her suicide plans, the twisted trauma of which was too great to contain/unable to move on due to "sin" - or unable to move on because secret of nancy's parentage still remained? "lucy never wanted me to figure out how she died" she only wanted nancy to figure out her parentage without solving the mystery, yet did lucy see/witness nancy's revelation at the claw, or with carson, or even ryan? waiting for karen/josh to know? or just vanished?

•concept of imperfect mom figures- lucy, kate, celia, victoria, even karen- who all struggle with failings

•since karen dispelled one of lucy's attempts at nancy's haunting at the garden party, is that proof she isn't haunting karen?

•the crew + needing adult help: george's possession and victoria, club busted and owen, car accident and mcginnis, thom and cipher, larkspur lane and sal, bones and john, agleaca and hannah

•everett is always sitting- at his home office, at dinner, at yacht club (wonder if that was his actor + had to do with his recasting?)

-dad talk-

•both her dads think negatively on her "girl detective" thing but ryan sees use in it as a means to get answers, carson would never 'use' her in that way

•nancy + carson : suffering

"what about what i wanted?" + carson being imprisoned for weeks but she immediately rejects him (the DAY he gets his freedom no less) with no regard to his suffering (caused by herdiary!!) in regards to her own from this new knowledge (she does suffer a lot- "almost dying is my new normal" but still)/ the "thankless job" of parenting

•nancy + adults - connected to cop thing a few posts earlier : nancy is v precocious and smart for her age- she is "old enough" but also has trouble with the "adults" in her life- fathers, moms, karen, and cops letting her down but depends heavily on "adults" she cantrust- hannah gruen, john sander, lisbeth- highlighting her youth and occasional naiveté; nancy is unafraid to hold adults accountable for their actions (ie karen) but also loses them as allies along the way. both hannah and john are very nonthreatening and also experts in their fields, while her fathers and karen are revealed to be "just another brick in the wall" average, capable of mistakes, and not the people she expects them to be, while characters like john and hannah can only benefit nancy because either they do not mean as much to her or have no reason/nothing to gain by lying; they are purposefully shown to be small, demure, gentle, and nonthreatening as foils/opposed to karen, ryan, and josh whom she previously trusted; carson (+kate) is nonviolent as well but has the biggest betrayal which is perceived as an act of violence to her very personhood/shattering who she thought she was so she cannot be that anymore (admits truths to john "everytime i dig i hurt everyone" and hannah-agleaca) : unclear if redemption is possible for anyone :

•nancy bonds with carson over loss and then ryan over haunting. but actually, nancy rejects carson over loss bc she wanted to say goodbye and wasnt allowed to- so carson was with kate but nancy was not. nancy and ryan are more equals about haunting bc they both start around the same time and conclude together as well [nancy and ryan bond over thinking their parents conspired to kill lucy- think sitting on the floor at velvet masque] nancy is appreciated by ryan for her ability to get answers- he has no qualms about going through her/outside of police bc he wants results/instant gratification and thinks nancy is more so the expert in her field/respects her even through her age- once again acknowledging she is braver than he is (think lucy + claw parking lot) and her portent in the car freaks him out bc shes usually always in control, esp with him

•bc nancy was told "you can't be afraid of the truth" until she was / ironic bc shes braver than him except when the truth is they are related then she's scared to tell him while he actually starts to take some initiative

•nancy picked "the wrong person" to help her through her grief in her dad's eyes like her mom's best friend was somehow a better choice? carson truly "parents" nancy even during grief and haunting (which she rejects) whereas nancy and ryan are really equals in all their situations which is actually better for her and easier for her to maintain- nancy's expectations are low so anything that ryan gives is a bonus. nancy's expectations of carson were shattered by his lies so now she has nothing to connect with him about- they could barely even connect when sharing the same grief- carson actually very hypocritical hence nancy's upset at karen revelation yet carson doesn't agree bc hes the "adult" and shes the "child" not realizing she hadnt been one for a long time (hidden staircase perhaps?) whereas ryan better treats her with lack of controlling parental nature bc he is impressed with her competence before he receives that knowledge; "lucy was smarter than me too" acknowledging her intellect negates his ability to "parent" ie control her to leave him solely with caring about her wellbeing in her situations + aftermath - i honestly dont think carson would ever admit that shes smarter than him* bc he thinks shes not "all grown up" yet ("youve kept me on the bench for years"); ryan is more willing to meet her where she's at which is so important for all her good relationships - ace, owen, etc

*carson asks for nancy to figure out "who to trust" in ep 12, finally admitting that she is useful/ie acknowledging that her skills/abilities do help, are necessary, and can in fact save lives --> this is then s2 follow up by working for him (but it takes him that long)

•ryan/nancy/carson venn diagram - using sex to escape trauma

•if not carson vs ryan then what about celia and everett vs patrice (and josh)? at this point in the narrative, do you think ryan's parents would take his side should the knowledge become public (without their involvement), or deny nancy?

•"we were a family" + the disruption of family dinner- kate was really the one holding that family together and her death makes it unsustainable

okay!! that's all folks! i have exhausted my plethora of nancy drew thoughts + knowledge. you will never have to hear from me again!! TYSSM 😘

[happymeishappylife]

TV Shows I Watched in 2020

Now some of this list are just seasons I watched for the shows I’m currently watching and are still airing while others I watched the entire show. I was only really able to do this because I worked from home for 6 months and when I started in my new position I was close enough to come home for lunch where I could watch quick 20-25 minutes before going back to the office. Still I was able to finish a lot of shows that were on my Netflix queue for years and catch up on ones I fell behind on. I also started a few that I’m excited to keep watching into next year. Here’s what I watched:

1. Good Omens

Thank you Neil, for all your hard work and creative input to make this delightful mini-series. This is how I wish all books were transformed on screen. With enough time and attention to detail to make the story shine through. Yes there were some differences between book and show, but ultimately it is one of the most true-to-book versions of live screen adaptation that I’ve seen. Plus everyone loves Michael Sheen and David Tennant and they were absolutely fabulous in this.

2. Parks and Recreation

I watched all seven series over the summer and not only were they hilarious and fun, they were a comfort. Leslie’s dedication to do good in her public service role and her devotion to make change in her town, no matter how crazy or ridiculous the plan was. It also it nice to think that their were people that dedicated to their job in a service line I work with pretty closely in my own work. I also loved the crazy personalities of all of her friends and enjoyed the character growth throughout.

3. Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (S6 & 7)

I may have mentioned this, but this was one show whose finale I felt did its characters justice. Yes the seasons have gone all over the place, yet it never felt so far fetched because in the end, it was just fun. Even with some of the more heartbreaking cliffhangers. I feel all the characters growth was organic and not forced and that the actors’ relationships, shine in their characters which made whatever crazy story was going on that much more engaging. I don’t think I’ll be watching any of the Disney+ series, but I am sad to see this Marvel series end. It’s been a great right.

4. Doctor Who (S12)

Anytime there is new Doctor Who, it’s a good year. Especially having gone a whole year without it (please don’t do that again! >.<), but I’ll admit it wasn’t my favorite on my first watch. I’m in the process of watching Jodie’s seasons again before the New Year Special, one to be in the mindset for the special, but also to give series 12 a better shot because I’ll admit, I had a lot of bad mental stuff going on while watching the rollercoaster of the season. I still enjoy it, despite the canon breaking/making shenanigans that is Doctor Who and I still can’t wait to see where they take it next. Also Sacha Dhawan, had an amazing performance of the Master (even if I’m sad that the Missy arc got completely ignored, lol).

5. Penny Dreadful (S2 & S3)

I started Penny Dreadful a couple years ago and got busy so never finished. What I enjoyed was that picking it back up where I left was easy. That and just the nature of the storytelling to be a good horror/drama show and really give new life to some of our beloved monsters and horror heroes. Victor Frankenstein’s arc working not only to love or accept his monsters, but the team up with Dr. Jekyll in a question of morality was great. Seeing a werewolf have mythology in Native American roots (even if the main actor was white... small pet peeve though I enjoyed Josh Harnet’s character) and having the final enemy be the one and only Dracula was great. Vanessa Ive’s story was also great through the whole series. My only dissapointment was Dorian’s picture wasn’t that scary and more just pitiful which is a shame because Reve Carney’s potrayal was fantastic.

6. Legends of Tomorrow (S4 &5)

When I caught up on the DC shows this year, I mentioned this but its still true, Legends is the best show of the bunch and it purely because they don’t take themselves seriously. Yes, you can have good drama and good moral lessons in super hero shows, but part of the show should also be to have fun as heroes. And Legends embodies that for all of them. It does genre episodes like Bollywood, Horror, Sitcoms, and its just fun. And it still makes its characters matter which is why it was sad to see Ray Palmer leave. But it has that energy of Doctor Who which is constant evolution in the cast and the characters which also makes it fresh and something the other shows lack.

7. How to Train Your Dragon: Race to the Edge

When I added this show to my queue a few years ago, I didn’t know if it was supposed to be purely a goofy kids show or still embody the spirit of the movies. It’s set between movies 1 & 2 through all six seasons and while yes it has its silly moments where it tries to do modern things in a viking setting, I still found the heart, bravery, and kindness that came from the original movie. Watching these six teenagers on the verge of adulthood tackle huge issues and learn more about dragons and the world around them was just as rewarding. I also think it is a great show to enjoy as an adult but also for kids to understand big ideas like grief. And at the end it just felt comforting to watch.

8. Black Lightening (S2 & 3)

I know I just said that I love Legends because it doesn’t take itself seriously, but the one show that did and did it well was Black Lightening. It’s a great new perspective on super heroes in the eyes of Black America. And at times it was hard to watch, but necessary. It tackles racism, injustice, and poor systematic issues that the Black community has had to deal with and still deals with and also gives them power via the Pierce family being incredible new and fresh superheroes. The representation of also having strong leads, most female with one of them being a Lesbian, is also huge and matters in the media landscape. It’s one of the few shows I enjoy on the network and I’m curious to what other stories can be told.

9. Stargirl (S1)

The main reason this show is good is because it doesn’t follow most other superhero shows. The ‘heroes’ don’t know how to keep their secrets because they are all goofy teenagers, the villains are well established while the heroes still are missing their full team, and the dilemmas of high school are some of the main focus in the show. Plus the musical soundtrack is amazing! It’s fun, it doesn’t have grit, but the problems are real and because I don’t know anything really about the Justice Society of America, I’m excited to learn about new and not as mainstream heroes.

10. Supernatural (S14 & 15)

An era has ending and everyone on this site knows this because Destiel ‘happened’ and Tumblr exploded, lol. To think that this show won’t be on anymore is kinda sad, but at the same time it ended and at least to me, ended as satisfactorily as I could have hoped given the amount of time these characters have died and come back, ended the world and saved it, and have just done random stuff that doesn’t make sense. I enjoyed the ending. I was super sad about Castiel, but it did tie up a loose end. And now that its over I can say I did watch it. I was in a super special place to have started it when I did in college and I wouldn’t necessarily recommend it to anyone, but it was an interesting ride all told.

Other Shows I watched:

11. American Horror Story ( S1 & 2)

12. Nokdu Flower

13. Batwoman (S1)

14. Supergirl (S4 & 5)

15. Knights of Sidonia

16. Street Foods Asia

17. World’s Most Extraordinary Homes (S3)

18. Arrow (S7 & 8)

19. The Flash (S5 & 6)

I also rewatched a couple shows because thanks to Netflix I could. They were good comfort shows to get back to when I was going into the unknown this summer:

1. Avatar: The Last Airbender

2. Avatar: Legend of Korra

3. Cardcaptor Sakua

4. Cardcaptor Sakura: Clear Card