#also lemme know if i used astaghfirullah wrong??

[mattcullen]

Farah is overprotective of Derek, she had shown up unannounced to legatees because she wants to meet the people he's hanging around ("Where's Dexter?" "Who?" "That Dex boy you never shut up about it's so sweet have y'all kissed yet is he good to you?" "Oh MY GOD HES MY D-MAN" {dex heard everything and almost passed out}) but no one minds when she shows up cause she's so cool

alright lets fuckin do this

working title: Farah Nurse (eventually) ships nurseydex

Farah loves her dumb as shit baby brother, okay? The problem is, obviously, that he can be dumb as shit.

When he starts at Samwell she decides that, living in Boston, it makes sense for her to check up on him every now and again. Just to make sure her dumb, emotional, wonderful brother is thriving.

The first time Farah visits it’s mid-October and she’s barely managed to fit in her and Derek’s weekly skype calls since her promotion to sergeant and she misses him. She’s also worried about him. Derek was never that kid growing up, the one surrounded by tons of friends. So she spends most of the drive overthinking scenarios in which he’s isolated himself from everyone.

It turns out her fears are completely unfounded.

She arrives at the end of practice, most of the team either collecting stray pucks or already in the locker room. As she walks down the stairs towards the boards she sees her baby brother still out on the ice, mucking around with who she can only assume is Chowder, the goalie she’s been hearing about non-stop. She sees #11 skate up behind Derek to pull off his helmet and give him a face wash before squeezing him around the waist. She sees her brother fucking giggling as an older boy with a C on his jersey barks at them to get off the ice. She watches Derek skate up to his captain to offer an apology fist bump, more confident in his own skin that she’s ever seen him.

Farah has tears in her eyes before she even reaches the side of the rink. She hasn’t met any of the team yet but she already fucking treasures them. She spends most of their introductions mentally thanking each of them for loving her brother the way he deserves to be loved.

Well, everyone except for William Poindexter. Who makes himself scarce as soon as he realises she’s Derek’s sister. Who she’s already heard enough about to not particularly care for his brand of ignorance. Who honestly doesn’t deserve to know the wonder that is her baby brother.

As such, she becomes accustomed to their Nurse sibling skype calls turning into “Dex is so fucking ignorant”, “Dex is a small-town asshole, he just doesn’t get it”, “Dex is a dumb motherfucking white boy and I need him to stop”. Then, during Derek’s second year, she’s forced to adjust her views in response to a gradual shift, as her brother’s stories turn into “Dex took the Republican sticker off his laptop today”, “Dex apologised for the stuff he said last year”, “Dex came out to me today”. By Derek’s junior year she actively looks forward to hearing her brother moon; “Dex scored the most amazing goal last night”, “Dex got his septum pierced, it looks really um cool”, “Dex, uh, hm, Dex made out with some guy at the kegster last night, ah, yeah anyway”.

Farah decides it’s time to visit her dumb as shit baby brother again.

She doesn’t really bother knocking when she gets to the Haus anymore. The SMH have always been welcoming and since Derek moved in they insist she comes and goes as she pleases. However, her surprise visit does lead to Derek opening his bedroom looking less than thrilled to see her. She pretends to be put out by this, just for the sake of keeping up appearance.

“I know why you’re here, Rah-Rah. It’s fine, don’t worry about me,” he mutters, scuffing his socked feet against hers.

Farah crosses her arms.

“One: I don’t even get a ‘hello’ anymore? Rude. Two: I always worry about you. Especially when you’re in love with one of your best friends and won’t do anything about it so said friend goes and kisses other people. I swear, if I have to sit through one more ‘wow, Dex’s hair is so pretty, did you know his freckles go all the way down his back, I wonder if Dex likes rice-‘”

A resounding crash can be heard from the frogs’ shared bathroom before Farah can finish her sentence, followed by a deafening silence and then what is unmistakably Dex’s muffled cursing. Derek immediately goes ashy. Farah feels like an asshole.

“Shit, Der-bear. I’m sorry, I swear I didn’t know he was in there.” Fuck, there are tears in his eyes. Shit, shit, shit.

“It-it’s fine, I didn’t either. He-uh, must have been hangin’ out with Chowder.”

The bathroom is eerily silent. Derek’s hands are shaking. She needs to get him out of here.

“Let’s go get ice cream!” She suggests, loudly.

Derek sighs, “Farah, it’s January and it’s 7pm.” But he follows her as she turns to walk down the stairs.

Derek spends the rest of the evening sitting in Giovanni’s alternating between freaking out and being totally silent. Farah spends it feeling absolutely terrible and praying that this doesn’t fuck her brother up completely.

Eventually they have to head back. Farah can’t stay late; early shift at the station, Derek understands. She walks him back to the Haus at close to midnight, repeating mantras of apologies and promises that she’ll always be free to talk if he calls, even if she’s in the middle of taking down a perp. Derek snorts at that and finally gives her a small grin for the first time since she arrived at Samwell. Doesn’t make her feel like any less of an asshole.

She’s still thinking about his shaky smile as she approaches her car and sees a dimly lit Dex leaning against it.

“Uh, hey,” he mumbles. Astaghfirullah, he looks awkward.

Farah takes a deep breath.

“Hey, Dex. What’re you doing out here?” She shoots for casual, missing it by a mile.

Dex winces, then visibly steals himself.

“Were you joking?” He asks, bluntly.

The flat ‘what’ escapes her mouth before she can really process what he’s asking.

“Earlier, were you joking?” He repeats, the words sounding like they’re being ripped out of him. “When you said Nursey was in love with me, was it-is it true?” Dex continues to speak through gritted teeth but Farah can hear the edge of desperation.

“That’s not really for me to say,” she answers honestly.

Dex lets out a groan of frustration.

“Farah, please.” His voice cracks.

“Talk to my brother, Dex. I’ve already fucked up enough tonight. It’s time for you two to do this on your own terms.”

With that she sidesteps him and gets into her car. Over the sound of engine, she hears the frantic footfalls of Dex sprinting back towards the Haus.

***

She’s just pulled into her parking spot when she checks her phone and sees she has three new texts.

Derek ‘fuckboy’ Nurse:

[12:12am] Dex says you talked to him

[12:13am] Dex wants to talk to me now

[12:29am] Dex is a really good kisser

Farah just smiles into her scarf and sends back three eggplant emojis.