#also pls ignore these tags its literally just me rambling

[lveclouds]

i am going through a major book hangover rn 

[chimerahyperfix]

RECIPE OF THE DAY

[OR: This was the most upsetting alternate looper option]

Long post because i have been cooking this in my brain for like, two months, and it's all-consuming. Also I'm not in the Discord yet because Anxiety so my ramblings had to go somewhere, and what better than one big fucking post yknow. I cast spell of fuck you mind blast on the tag/lh /j

TLDR for below: Siffrin words his wish differently, Bonnie gets trapped in a time-loop, and despite saying they're in a timeloop repeatedly nothing works and no one can help them. The normal ISAT absolute horrors ensue.

CONTENT WARNINGS: the normal ISAT tags [death, violence and trauma, suicide, self harm and unreality], Notable Pin on child endangerment and death, poisoning.

most of these get discussed ^ even if shortly

SO. THIS AU.

This is it this is my big one. Ignore me pushing the literal 12 other isat aus I have into a pile pls this is THE big one. I’m looking at the note I’ve stored all this lore in on my notes app,and it’s like. 35 fucking pages?

I've looked at a ton of alternate looper aus [that's part of the hyperfixation babeyyyy I need to consume ALL content forever and ever and ever] and I was like “oohhhh I wanna do that!!” So I literally just listened to music until I caught an idea and yikes. Looking at the AUs playlist now [it’s about 100 songs! Oops!] and I’m like [cartoony image of me laying face first on the floor]

This is a bit scattered because I wrote it over 3 days instead of working on the fic I’m supposed to be writing ooopsieeeee. Ramblings belowvvvvvvvvvv

It begins as simply as the game does. No one knows how to wish properly; so Siffrin wishes, because they know how to. The same folded leaf, repeated three times wish. Close to what is said in canon; different enough for the Universe to read it differently. No longer does Siffrin loop, because the wish isn’t about him, it’s about Bonnie and their sister. Siffrin’s wish is construed as “I wish Bonnie’s wish would come true,” and even if the Universe can’t hold onto Bonnie’s wish as they did it wrong, it CAN hold onto Siffrin’s.

And that’s the base point: EVERY LOOP, Siffrin wishes, because he wishes after he talks to them and that's where they loop back to, and its wish craft goes to Bonnie. A recipe for disaster with how much time they have!

They loop back when Siffrin gets crushed by the rock, because they can’t win while being down a party member. When they touch a tear, or when the sadnesses get the jump on the party and they all go down, or when they use the dagger equivalent [a poisoned snack], or when they get to the King. They Never Beat The King. Think SASASAaP but ISAT.

Bonnie doesn’t fight with craft, but rather craft-infused weapons. The wok and their pan for rock, a pair of kitchen shears for scissors and a cookbook for paper. Snacks for healing and buffs. And they have a cool friend that lives in the favor tree! [they get in fistfights like every five loops. Maybe it would be funny, someone just as willing to spar with them instead of trying to find the right words they can’t find because they’re a kid, if their friend wasn’t ALSO another version of themself, which bonnie clocks pretty late.] They pick up little quirks from their friends, like biting their nails like Belle, and puffing up to look bigger like Isa and stealing Dile's curses and closing an eye to match Frin's in focus. And maybe they start forgetting a little bit, just a little! The same thing over and over will get to you.

So everything essentially boils down to this. Bonnie specifically needs to be strong enough to beat the King, as the rest of the party doesn’t keep experience through loops. For a good chunk of the loops, they take advantage of Siffrin asking them if they need help and drag him into a training lesson that slowly goes from a whole emotional conversation to them quietly listening to Siffrin’s every word. [Siffrin fills this silence with random star facts that pop into their mind. This Is Important It WILL Be On The Test] Eventually the training becomes too tedious, so they start sneaking off to go fight sadnesses— and eventually just punch trees, which busts their knuckles— to get stronger faster! Everything goes downhill from there, with them forgetting to make food to them sneaking out at night to fight more to them getting reckless and uncaring; it snowballs down into “oh this could be considered suicidal confidence”.

Every loop, you say "hey, I'm trapped in a time loop", and EVERY time it is a big emotional thing that exhausts you to the point of going to bed immediately after, and everyone gets antsy and worried, and in the end the anxiety and trouble NEVER ends up mattering because the King still flattens the party every time. [And (shuffling through the sea of my notes for the au), imagine this from their situation for a second; Today, you tell your friends you are trapped in a time loop. They drag you into a long, uncomfortable conversation that makes you cry, and you go to bed with a full stomach and the knowledge they will protect you, and you will protect them. You make sure he doesn't get squashed by a boulder, you make sure they find the key, you make sure they don't die. Tomorrow, you will tell your friends you are trapped in a time loop. They will drag you into a long, uncomfortable conversation that will make you cry, and you will go to bed with a full stomach and the knowledge they've failed to protect you, but they're trying this loop, and you'll still protect them anyway.]

And then the King fight. He grabs them and he kills them and it fucks them up. [it fucks them up, until it too happens again and again, and eventually it simply is just another obstacle you must pass, because the second his stupid hand wraps around you like a ragdoll it’s over, so you just spit in his face to make him press the trigger immediately and not drag it out for forever- imagine the most traumatic event in your entire life, repeated over and over, until it looses all meaning. It’s still traumatic, it’s sewn into your brain forever you will never forget this.]

They tell the party ‘hey, I just got murdered’, and if this au was ISAT, it would go from having a memory that gave everyone a defense buff to a memory that literally stops you from winning, randomly attaching to a party member. You couldn’t get rid of it. They’d take every hit for you, and you’d have to loop back, because you couldn’t win with an unremovable memory like that. and that’s why they stop saying things, because if the people you loved would die to protect you, something you don’t want and have the ability to stop, would you stop them?

And so everything collapses, and from that point [the start of act 4] it collapses fast.

WHICH LEADS US TO ENDLESS MY FAVORITE LITTLE THANG

if this is transparent or not I don’t fucking know and honestly. After 2 hours of fighting ibisPaint X to make it transparent I stopped caring. o7

Slight design notes tangent: the fucking. Wispy things around their limbs just kinda move around them- yknow because black holes pull things in and they are one. Their like,,,, face spike design??? Question mark on what 2 call it? It’s designed to look like their hair lol. The little star-dot things on their knuckles are important smile. Eventually I’ll post a full thing 4 them (I have like 2 pages of random doodles of them it’s craaazy)

Endless (or Ness, later on) is Bonnie’s loop-alike. They’re a little angry hater and I based them on the song Black Hole Sun [therefore they double-dip in the space theming, the little scoundrel! Imagine being both a black hole and a partial eclipse!! Damn why you taking all the space theming for!!] which was the song the whole AU was based on! Woah! Damn you carrying ALL the out of AU lore in you! They’re anger over fear while Bonnie is fear over anger.

They make me SO fucking upset. Like. I’m not being funny anymore. This is THE most upsetting character I’ve ever written. They make me cry. My entire schtik is making horror and this little creature is the most upset I've ever been at a creation of mine.

Endless is a Bonnie who, without exaggerating, literally imploded from having too much wish craft in them— hence the black hole theme. They went through an unreasonable amount of loops [i think I noted down 400??? Probably not that many, but hey, leveling is slow when half the time you rely on a scripted event that has like 3 enemies. Never really pinned anything down, but it’s a CRAZY upsetting amount.] and just couldn’t win,, and they eventually broke, and begged for it to stop— and, well, with so much wish craft in them, even without the proper rituals the Universe just couldn’t ignore ALL this wish craft, overflowing, in one spot. They asked for help and it killed them.

And then they were at the tree! And they’re helping a DIFFERENT Bonnie, who they’re upset at because what. What why is this happening? They asked for it to stop, not for a whole NEW Bonnie to exist and to do it all over again, what is this what, stop stop it. And they have to keep watching Siffrin wish, and doom them to their endless loop, and they have to tell Bonnie no, the party can’t help them like they want the party to do because the party never could help them, and it’s just going to bring them distress and heartache. Bonnie does it anyways, until the very beginning of act 4: it goes downhill from there, until they’re worried This Bonnie will end up like THEM.

They’re not the most self-confident type. They give themself the most un-nicknameable name [Bonnie still finds one that fits— Ness. They reluctantly accept it.] [Endless vc: Ness? Like? From Earthbound???] they can think of because nicknames are a love language and they speak it, and they don't think they deserve it anymore because they've Changed, and trade out the nicknames they have for the party for things they learned from Siffrin in their own many many training loops: The Sun, The Moon, The Star, The Sky, and Bonnie is Supernova, because its cool as hell and Siffrin told them that’s what happens when a star dies, and they died. Open foreshadowing. They take to closing the same eye they made Siffrin the Star loose, because if he doesn’t get to see anymore neither should they— even if that eventually becomes a natural thing, something they do now to focus. They talk about a sister they have— had, because their world is gone and she never got unfrozen, they never learned if she was alive under all that icy craft or not, and they’re not Bonnie anymore. Ness is Bonnie, but Bonnie is not Ness.

And so, when act 5 hits, they’re desperate. They can’t see it happen again, because it erased them as a person and it was terrifying enough why would you want to see it happen again? they prepare to storm the house, bevause theyre strong enough to tear it apart themself, get stopped by the party, and essentially they’ve replaced Bonnie for a loop; which would be okay, if failing didn’t mean there would probably be Two Endlesses and No Bonnie’s. By the end of the au, Bonnie, lvl 99, is like bringing a brick to a stare down. Endless, in comparison, is like bringing a bazooka to a fistfight. They can’t face the King, they can’t, it would probably mess something up [the party has them pinned as being a kid by this point— wether they realise Ness acts a lot like Bonnie or not, who knows] so they panic and wave the party off into the King’s room and fights off the remaining sadnesses to calm down.

And the Party brings Bonnie down, and they fight a fake version of their sister [who they win against, even if barely, because Nille is their sister and damnit, Nille would never hurt them, not after giving up her life for them] and they have a breakdown, and then there's two of them. There's Bonnie and there's Ness. Bonnie confronts them and they get in ANOTHER fistfight, bveause how else would two angry ultra-powerful preteens settle things, and Bonnie convinces them to come along, because their identity has been found out and damnit Nille really won't care, Ness is her sibling too.

[Nille approaches the situation carefully, but Bonnie is right: Nille sees the two of them and immediately decides she has two siblings and she wants to protect them. Both of them went through so, so much, and they saved the country and damnit it would be monstrous to throw Ness out to the wolves because they Changed. Aka I was physically incapable of letting Ness dissapear or have a bad ending they deserve the world too.]

I just I jsutt. Auguhghghghhh. au too big in my brain spill it out on the floor it goes everywhere. When you hyperfix on your own au

[ruiimellowww]

Okay HI hello 👋👋

I saw ur art about Sun & Moon through a reblog and I am such a simp for those two omg so here's a rant :33

(Also if you're not comfy with this pls ignore this rant then, and I am so sry if that is the case!! Will stop immediately if you tell me to /srs)

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CAN I JUST SAY I am sosososososo in love with your desgin for the dca cuz holy shit I have never seen anything hotter. O.O LIKEEE THE HUMANOID VERSION??!?!!?? UGH soooo goooodd 🥵🥵 I love the designs and the- the little EARRINGS as well?!??! Omg sooooo cutee aaaaaa 💞💞

and-and omigosh UR ART IS SO GOOD AS WELL!?!? I straight up just wanna munch it. I am eating ur art fr. In LOVE with ur artstyle it's so yummy 😍

Anywhoooo I also scrolled through your dca tag aND *GASP* ECLIPSE?????? 😍😍AND I?? WANNA??? BE ENVELOPED????? BY HIMM??? (I feel like mans would give THE BEST cuddles on the planet!!!)

HOLLLYYYY SHITTTT thE SIZEEEEEEE

Big tall omigoshhhhhhHHH M- my brain- my heart my- mY EVERYThIng is mELTING! ! ! ! ! Literally his size just does something to me I cannot comprehend why omigosh

(*lays in a puddle on the floor*)

I can imagine sosososo many different scenarios where that height could be used aaaaa >~< <333 ;P

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Omg if you have any HCs (and *wanna* share, ofc.) about him (Or about Sun & Moon) I'd love to listen to you ramble about them??? <333

So curious about ur HCs & would absolutely love any crumbs about the dca ksskksskkdkdjdks ❤️😂

Uhm uhm first off, thank you so much I can't rlly put into words how sweet this is and I totally don't mind the rambles because me too. And also because its been YEARS since I last used Tumblr or did anything answering Ask is a bit tough for me.. MmMM

Although I don't have many HC at the moment.. I can however give you a little insight I have regarding my Human DCA :]

Moondrop (Moon) and Sundrop

- when I first designed Moon (after the game came out) he had a much wilder look to him, especially the face because I was really into the idea of him being simply insane hence the red.

- later when i got back to his design and adding colours I thought that it would be fun to make it Blue and white themed, which I actually didn't see a lot back then

- he wasn't supposed to look human even as a Humanoid, I liked to think that Sun & Moon simply had a renovated body. They are just as much Animatronics as they had always been, robotic parts and everything but with a bit of twist

- So then onto Sun.. the thing is its sad to say but I never explored much with Sun's design back then as much as I did with Moon, so I can't provide a good reference

- although I had a rough idea of how sun would look like I never quite liked the way I drew him, so he's always somewhat been stuck in this unfinished stage

- Then there was eclipse, who was my absolute FAVORITE at that time, I don't think I loved a character MORE THAN ECLIPSE EVER when I was drawing him out

- yes!! It was very much inspired by the 3D render shown here as the ref, though I did make some changes of my own to the design as well

- I had a lot in my head when I was drawing him, but the one thing that I loved most about this design still to thisq day is rhe face. The way I him to look back then was sort of a mix between my Sun and Moon designs, only leaning more towards Sun in colours and Moon in appearance with the crazed look in his eyes

The height was just a funny little thing I thought of, cuz imagine this giant fkn ahh robot just comes in here and picks you up 💀 god I would piss myself

Cough..

So in regards to the new design, I did kind of get rid of the animatronic feel to him that I had done with the DCA and his old design, all of them now look a whole lot more Human which is what I intended for

Eclipse has a few scars around his body; right forearm, left side of his torso that leads all the way up to his chest. Plus a bit of his face that is burnt which you can't exactly see because of the Black spots

Overall I like my newer designs quite a lot and has also changed a lot, this is probably the most insight you'll get out of me abt my art 😭😭 cuz I don't usually ramble this much otherwise

I might come up with some head canons at a later date, but they'll be fun thats for sure ;)

[retelling-of-ragnarok]

I’m not sure if I should ask this to you, or Auren’s admin. But: Has Gwen ever talked about other characters before? If not, hypothetically— How would Auren react to Gwen talking about any of the other canon characters/ocs?

❆ You can ask either of us!!! I decided to do Richter, with the addition of Ryuuto ( @fruit-of-infidelity ) bc not only does Gwen have different ways of talking about them— Auren’s DRASTICALLY different reactions to Gwen talking about them are hilarious to me. 😭

Gwen basically uses Auren as their talking outlet. So y’know. During their regular visits to Vibora territory,Gwen just sorta rambles about all that’s happened. So they’ve likely gone from COMPLAINING about Richter. Y’know being grumpy about the way he acts, how cruel he is, how they wish for some piece and quiet and whatnot.

And Auren ALREADY doesn’t like him, (which the reason as to why is fucking HILARIOUS) so its expression is just: “🙄😐”

But don’t think it didn’t notice that slight inflation in Gwen’s tone when they started talking about his kid 🤨. Like Gwen of all people being interested in someone? ENTERTAINED? BY SOMEONE ELSE? 🤨 Auren really whipped it’s head around like:

“say sike rn.”

especially since it’s Richter’s kid bro. like the same man gwen was just complaining about 🤨 eye rolling, slumped posture, not a vivid expression in sight? oh but NOW all of a sudden they’re posing some interesting conversation, being expressive and engaging 🤨 AND FOR WHO? THE MAN’S KID? Wack 🙄✋

Nah but again. Auren already (jokingly) dislikes Richter bc they think he’s boring, too serious, AND he has no pizazz to his wardrobe. AUREN THINKS HE’S DEPRESSING 😭✋. So hearing Gwen talk with so much interest about Ryuuto really gave it whiplash 😭 (it would def also get really jealous. bc why can’t gwen talk about IT like that 🤨 even though they do but auren’s ignoring that point—)

ANYWAYS I HOPE THIS ANSWERS YOUR QUESTION!!! But also feel free to ask @sincerest-aa , if you’d like a different POV 💪😎

BUT THIS IS ALSO *IF* GWEN WERE TO TALK TO AUREN ABOUT THESE TWO TOGETHER. Gwen already rambles on about Richter since both they and Auren know him. I mainly added Ryuuto to give some perspective on diff characters 😞💪 (and auren would have the funniest reactions to these two. such DRASTICALLY different emotions for characters who are literally related is hilarious to me. )

and ofc Ava im so sorry for the random tag pls forgive me 🙇🙏🤲 i hope you don’t mind me using your boy for reactions like these— IF ITS A PROBLEM THOUGH DONT HESITATE TO TELL ME. ❆

[pup-pee]

This is so random but I saw ur tags in the rb of an old birdflash fanart and ur energy just resonated with me and I was like I must follow this person... Anyways hello:D ur art style is so lovely I'm so glad I found this blog I am fucking insane over Wally West but also batfam and THE BARRY & WALLY FATHER SON DYNAMIC IS THE ONLY THING EVERRGGRHRHTJFJKZKSKSJFKK

Also I am staring at the tmnt in ur bio, I saw a comment recently that said that Leo & Raph are basically dick and Jason and omg I have never been the same since like WTF why are they so right....

omgomg HELLO??? u liking my tags actually means sm wtf skgjkajkgkh BUT HI YES HELLO HEY!!! TYSM 4 LIKING MY ART AS WELL OMG??? bcb cb c bc bc u points @ u u like wally i have a silly hc i drew a little bit ago

THIS GOT RLLY LONG SO IM SRRY LSKJFKSL

i will give it 2 u bc y not skjgkgALSO INCLUDES A BIT OF WALLY + BARRY WHICH IS Y I THINK HT OF IT OK

BASICALLY ITS A HC ABOUT WALLY WEARING GLASSES THEN EVENTUALLY WEARING BRACES/HEADGEAR BC LISTEN PLS HEAR ME OUT

glasses bc i just think so theres rlly no other reason just always had glasses as a kid

IGNORE THR TRASH ITS JUST HOW I DO MY SKETCHBOOKS ANYWAYS AKHFK

SO GLASSES RIGHT??! THEN HE BCAME A SPEEDSTER likekeeee preteen-ish? if im not wrong// BUT LIKE getting accelerated,,,, everything ig @ that age would b CRAZYY so i think his teeth got kinda vry fucked up((im so nice 2 the blorbos,,,i swear,,,,((dont belive me)) SO HE HAD 2 GET BRACES & HEADGEAR

he doesnt wear contacts no matter how roy or dick tries 2 convince him he doesnt want 2 use their money

he will keep taping his silly blocky glasses until they literally turn 2 ash

just take the whole sketch book page whateverrrr r rr

BUT YEAH THATS OT OTS SILLY & MEANS NOTHING BUT EVERYTHING 2 ME barrys there just listening 2 him talk bc no1 used 2 listen 2 him infodump about much b4 idk

i feel the need 2 show wally sketches but i rlly dont have that much((that isnt au related))

i think this 1 is silly anywhoo there was tmnt in this & ill brb

LITERALLY THEMM i was NKT reasy 2 draw fhem 2day omg skfjksjf they looks so ass i swear i can draw a pretty dick

jason tho??…,,,,,, uhm uhm srry pat pats

also srry u only rlly((like RLLY)) know tmnt2012 so akhfkfk

GIVE JASON A SPIKE RN((talked w/madi & jason actually needs a bearded dragon)) <- putting this hear so if i ever reread this ill know

ANYWAYS RED BLUE SIBLINGS SO TRUE ITS ACTUALLY THEM JSUT

im remembering some of the more,,,dramamtic moments of 2012 tmnt & like holy hell yeah

i gotta bring out the tmnt au again its literally mostly abiut dimentsion x bc angst but holymoly

holy moly ahhahabf my humoresuck i kinda 4got what i was writing tbh so oopsies

hey guys? what do we think of s2 -> s3? ((leo in a coma + canine)) ????? how we feelingvvvbbb jsi!!?!? im literally talking 2 myself & thid point ermmm

ANYWAYS HI I CANT BELEIVE U UR SO SILLY U READ THE TAGS AKFJFKV seey 4 my rambling :3

/e wave 2 u!!!!!

[djarinscyare]

.

[poetic-ivy]

8 PEOPLE I’D LIKE TO KNOW BETTER

I was tagged by @dotingdamen.... wow im seeing this so late, thank you & im sorry rip

ONE / name / alias. eli / elishayva

TWO / birthday. november 11

THREE / zodiac sign. scorpio (if we’re supposed to get technical i guess the list is scorpio sun, virgo moon, cancer rising. if you’d asked me this like a month or two ago i woulda shrugged and been like “scorpio? thats it? idk the rest” but @dotingdamen forced me to learn shit so here we are even if i still only halfway understand it lmaoo)

FOUR / height. 5′6

FIVE / hobbies. reading, drawing, writing, singing, annoying my siblings (a valid hobby...yeah?)

SIX / favorite colors. rude question, how do i choose? i love bright but still somehow calming colors? like the fire of sunset, or a blade of light snatching the edge of the ocean in the distance

SEVEN / favorite books. the raven cycle, six of crows, all for the game, carry on, the road by cormac mccarthy, and riptide by kat falls (a kids book, but one i still dearly love for its world building... hook me directly to that ocean dystopia aesthetic, i will devour it with gusto)

EIGHT / last song listened to. gingerbread man by melanie martinez (dont @ me pls)

NINE / last film watched. the sandlot. currently on a nostalgia trip w my grandma so we’ve been hitting all my childhood classics this week

TEN / inspiration for muse. the rhythm of a phrase, the way a word will catch my attention and drip like honey in its potential; the play of sunlight as it filters through dark leaves, turning its surroundings into a soft secret of green and gold; the bounce of a string within a chord, vibrating with an energy that somehow still allows me to shape it directly to air in the form of an ancient yet continuously newborn sculpture of sound

ELEVEN / dream job. getting paid to do whatever i love, to be allowed to be creative and share it with the world and not have to worry about where the next paycheck is coming from... i dont even care at this point. someone hook me up with whatever the modern day equivalent of da vinci’s patronage is. i’ll gladly drag paintings around w me for 15 years and draw shit in exchange for food, travel, and lodging (please don’t analyze this plan too much i Know there are holes and i know im probably ignoring some history but this is me just rambling bullshit as it comes to mind lmao)

TWELVE / meaning behind your url. those first four series i listed in my favorite books? my url is a nod to each of them... keys = aftg, crows = soc, dreamers = trc, and scones = carry on

I’m tagging: @gurupuffs @appleswhoneedsthem @cattatonically @jurgenronaaz @kevndreil @jtmann182 and basically anyone else in the book fandom circles who wants to do this because y’all all make me emotional on the regular so :))) also when i say im tagging you, dont feel like you have to respond or do this, it literally just means i want to say hi and maybe be buds if you want because y’all cool af but im also very too Shy to initiate contact normally so i’m just tagging you here before i run away and hide... 

[nochuuuenthusiast]

tag!

hii~ so i got tagged by @snugglemejeon thank you so much ! i think this is really cute hehe (to the people i tagged: i’m sorry if i tagged you and we haven’t talked that much... i don’t know that many people on tumblr... and also, you don’t have to do this challenge, so feel free to ignore it !) 

rules are: (1) tag the person who tagged you (2) answer the questions (3) tag 10 people (sorry i don’t know that many people here on tumblr so i’m only gonna tag one or two :( but ps! if you wanna be friends with me, don’t hold back and just talk to me hehe) 

(1) how tall are you? 

i haven’t checked in a bit but i’m about 5′2″ (ish) so that’s around 158cm (*sighs* yeah i know... i’m pretty short) 

(2) what color and style is your hair?

i actually got a haircut yesterday before my blackpink concert hehe so now my hair is layered and it goes a little past my shoulders. i didn’t start growing out my hair until late last year since i used to always cut it short (like, a little above my shoulders) so yeah... i used to dye my hair a longgg longggg time ago but now it’s its original color which is dark brown 

(3) what color are your eyes? 

a solid brown (not totally light, but not too dark) (my mom has really pretty light brown eyes but they didn’t get passed down to me so ahhaha *cries*) 

(4) do you wear glasses? 

yes, but no (?) i have glasses but i don’t wear them 24/7 since my eyesight isn’t that bad... i only wear them in class when i’m too far away from the board. i have kinda circular, brown glasses (lmao, i know no one asked but...) 

(5) do you wear braces?

i used to wear braces a couple of years ago so now i just wear my retainers once a week (you’re supposed to wear them every night but whatever,,, i’m pretty lazy and irresponsible and my teeth haven’t shifted sooo once a week will do ahah) 

(6) what’s your fashion sense? 

i care about how i dress but i don’t worry about how i look all the time soooo... i’ll sum up my style in a few words: 26 year old single korean girl walking to an aesthetic cafe on a sunday afternoon. yeah. that’s basically my style. lol i hope you guys understand what i mean... if not, i’m terribly sorry

(7) full name? 

only a few people on tumblr know my name... but i don’t want to reveal it here since i know everyone can see this, and tumblr is the only social media platform where my identity is hidden sooo... 

but if you want to get to know me and learn my name then you can definitely message me or send something to me :) i’m nice, i swear

(8) when were you born?

july 2001; i’m 17 ;) 

(9) where are you from and where do you live now? 

i was born and currently live in los angeles, california however, i am 100% korean. both of my parents were born and raised in south korea. and yes, i am fluent in korean. 

(10) what school do you go to? 

i am a highschooler. and that’s all i’m gonna say. skool sucks :P

(11) what kind of student are you?

i would like to say that i’m more of a hard worker than a naturally smart person, but i am currently getting straight As and for those of you who live in the us, i’m taking 5 APs (which totally sucks :’( but i’m handling them kinda well... i think). and i don’t really like being complimented because one of my biggest fears is of me becoming arrogant so let’s move on,,, pls. 

(12) do you like school?

hell no. but i have to deal with it since everyone does so :/// school isn’t that bad if you daydream and think about bts all day hehe. but in all seriousness, i think school is okay if you have the right friends to hang out with and talk to 

(13) favorite subject? 

history!!! i know this is really weird since not a lot of people like history, but i love ittt!!! i think it’s really fun since it’s kinda like one big story of our world (i’m sorry, i’m such a dork)... i took ap art history last year and i fell in love with it! 

(14) favorite tv shows? 

i used to watch kdramas a longgg time ago, but i kinda stopped but idk why... but my favorite tv shows are friends, the office, stranger things, jane the virgin, etc, etc... i can literally name so many tv shows that i’ve watched but then i’d go rambling on and on and on and i don’t want to bore anyone...

(15) favorite movie? 

forrest gump !!! (and also, did anyone see the two bts movies? i watched both of them at cgv and i literally exploded when i saw the members... okay, moving on (sorry... i get off topic really easily)) 

(16) favorite books? 

i read a book called “pachinko” by min jin lee over the summer and it was so! freaking! good!!! i highly recommend it everyone~ it’s a historical fiction novel about 3-4 generations of this korean family who lived in korea and then moved to japan. it takes place a little before the korean war and it talks about the discrimination that koreans faced in japan at the time. i recently went to the library to check it out since i wanted to read it again but they didn’t have an english copy of the book so i’m reading it in korean at the moment. 

(17) favorite pastime? 

rewatching and rewatching and rewatching bangtan. oh, and streaming their new album ;) oh, and stressing over the new test questions on the fan cafe that the staff upload every week (i need to level up but the test is so hard... i cry every time) 

and writing for this blog! i originally made this blog to de-stress and write some scenarios and reactions and i didn’t know that people would actually like them and respond to them,,, so hey, thank you :) you make me happy every day 

(18) do you have any regrets? 

yes. too many to count. but i’m not gonna sit here and list them all lol

(19) dream job?

i don’t really know... but something in corporate law (?)

(20) would you ever like to be married? 

yessss! have you seen my entire blog??? it’s an entire fluff kingdom!!! i mean, i know that marriage is not just one big fluff and i know that it’s tough, but i would still like to get married one day 

i have my own little fantasies about how married life would be, but that’s a little secret so i’ll save it for next time ;) 

(21) would you like to have kids? 

as much as i love kids, i’m not too sure if i would want any... i mean, obviously my answer will change in the future, but i kinda want either no kids or just one kid... the responsibility of being a parent kinda freaks me out...

(22) how many?

oops, i kinda answered this already in (21) but i’ll answer again anyway: 0-1 

(23) do you like shopping? 

no, i absolutely LOVE shopping. i think i’m addicted lmao. 

psssss: i know no one asked, but my favorite retail shop is madewell

(24) what countries have you visited? 

ahhh finally... the question i’ve been waiting for... so if you get to know me, i really really really reallyyyyy love traveling and i’m so grateful for all the opportunities i’ve been given to travel at such a young age. 

so, let me just list all the places i’ve been to (an i know not all of these are countries, or out of the us, but just hear me out,,, okay?) : france, italy, south korea, mexico, us (hawaii, nevada, utah, etc (lol, i can’t remember all of them)) 

my favorite location out of all of these places is definitely italy <3 (italy has my heart)... i stayed at rome and i also visited pompeii and positano (which were absolutely stunning and beautiful). i went to rome last spring (around april/may) and i personally, really love sightseeing and history and since rome is full of those two things i reallyyy enjoyed it there. oh, and don’t even get me started with the food <3333 

i also really loved france... i stayed at paris and my favorite thing about paris was definitely the louvre museum (once again, i love art history) as well as this place called montmarte (ahh! it’s so pretty) 

and last but not least, (as much as i love love loveee south korea) i really enjoyed mexico! i love calming, relaxing vacation spots so i got to go to cancun (twice!) and snorkel and swim and see little fishies in the clear turquoise ocean... yeah, i miss it there... :( 

(25) scariest nightmare you have ever had

i would totally tell you guys, but it was too complicated so i’m not even gonna bother. 

(26) any enemies? 

i am a lover, not a fighter (hehe)

(27) any significant other?

does jungkook count? lmaooo it’s a joke... he doesn’t even know i exist lol. 

my answer is no. 

(28) do you get along with you family?

yes, yes i do.

(29) do you believe in miracles?

i believe things happen for a reason... so does that count? 

last but not least... (30) how are you?

i’m actually doing pretty well :))) i was in this really big emotional slump that kinda felt like a roller coaster ride last year, but i’m over it now so... yeah... i doing pretty well :) 

okay, so now that i’m done, i have to tag people, and like i said, i don’t talk to that many people on tumblr since i’m a loser lol so here are the people i’ll tag (sorry, i’m not gonna tag 10 people) : 

@pjmochii @jsuga @kpopsffct @ anyone who wants to do it... 

but yea, i seriously don’t know that many people since i haven’t been on tumblr for a long time, so i’m sorry to the people who i tagged (if i haven’t talked to you a lot, i’m sorry... i’ll try to be a better person and try to talk to you more ...) 

[kxias]

...so, yeah, don’t rlly know how the fuck i got accepted to be quite honest w you??? like that definitely sounded fake but yet here we are??? anyways, hi, i’m red (she/her pronouns please) i’m 19 and i live in the est timezone and i am so, so excited about this roleplay — like i said, highkey was not expecting to get accepted so it certainly came as a shock when i refreshed the main before leaving to grab dinner and saw my post? i’ve been dying to put this muse of mine into play for a month or so now but i really haven’t been able to find a group that i was Down for up until i saw this one ! i am a heaux for uni rps, an even bigger one for the greek life rps since i in a million years would never be able to join greek life (yay introvert!!) and while i wasn’t here first time around, i’m happy to be here now and writing w all you lovely people ; i’m working on getting her stats and wanted connections up so pls bear with me, classes started back today and i’m trying to sift thru all the junk of my online courses while attempting to enjoy my last moments of freedom but they’ll be up soon ! in the meantime, there’s a bit beneath the cut about my baby angel and a few ideas to tide you over, make the heart go red and i’ll pop in your ims for plots ! and yes, i do ramble like this all the time so Get Ready !!

tw: death, slight depression, mentions of verbal/emotional abuse

have you read the gossip blog lately ? apparently, a GIGI HADID lookalike was seen strolling across campus with their DANCE textbook. but nah, that’s just KAIA ZAMAN, the TWENTY year old JUNIOR, i’m sure you know HER. they’re mostly known as THE SANGUINE because they’re very SILVER-TONGUED and INTREPID but also RETICENT and GUILELESS.

so kaia was born and raised in chicago, illinois, the only child her parents ever had due to a few factors — one of which being that it was incredibly hard for her mother to carry a child + rushed into an emergency hysterectomy right after kaia’s birth, so she was their rainbow baby

her parents did everything in their power to make kaia as happy as they possibly could since she had been everything they’d wanted for so long, so whether it was letting her watch another cartoon before bed or enrolling her in dance classes at the age of three after a full-fledged obsession with the nutcracker reached its pique, they pretty much granted her any wish she could’ve possibly had

at age four, a few nights after christmas, kaia and her parents were on their way home from dinner, taking a road that was pretty notorious for collecting black ice in the winter and got into a really bad accident, and this cost her both of her parents

so in her father’s will + due to a lack of any other eligible family members, kaia was left in the custody of her uncle ( dad’s younger brother ) and it was...disastrous, to say the least; daniel had pretty much resigned to a life of forever being a bachelor and fucking around and now he had a four year old niece that he was expected to raise???

her uncle was a trashbag with a few shreds of decency (driven by guilt) in him — he wasn’t going to dump her into the foster system but he sure as hell didn’t want anything to do with her ! so in true trashbag fashion, he just decided to completely neglect her, pretend like she wasn’t there and hope she’d get the hint, and it took her a while to figure this out?? kaia was a sweet kid who went from having a shit ton of affection and love to being ignored and treated like she was a nuisance, and it fucked w her head at four years old

she wound up raising herself; all her uncle was good for was giving her a place to live, making sure she had clothes on her back and food in her stomach, and putting on an act when people gave a second glance their way. the only time he really wanted anything to do with her was when he could benefit her somehow, like keep one of his girlfriends around ( they all found kaia adorable and daniel ‘admirable’ for stepping up ) or when it came to the $$, her parents had left her a little but daniel pretty much absorbed it and took it for himself, to throw more parties or buy booze or play sugar daddy to one of his hookups?? like i said, trashbag

kaia and her uncle were roommates at best, and that was pushing it — she struggled a lot with the neglect internally, and her way of coping was to push it down, push it down, suppress with a smiling face and act like all was well. daniel was enough of a decent person to let her continue with the dance lessons which she absolutely adored, dance was her Everything, and by the time she hit high school, she started teaching classes at the studio she learned at in order to make some $$ that daniel wouldn’t take for his own

the older she got, the more she’d fight back a little against daniel and they had their fair share of fights ( which usually ended in daniel saying something to shut her down entirely and she’d scramble away ) but even despite that, sHE NEVER GAVE UP HOPE ON HIM...?? like, kaia always gave him the benefit of the doubt even though he’d proved himself time and time again thAT HE DIDN’T DESERVE IT

to her it was v black and white, she didn’t understand why tf he wouldn’t just get over himself and be a Family ( daniel is Where she gets her stubbornness tbh ) but despite having a little resent towards him, kaia never ever stopped hoping that he’d wake up one day and they’d start being a family and she still hasn’t bc optimist in the highest degree

when it came to college, kaia knew if she didn’t get out of chicago she was literally going to be sick, there was just smth about the loneliness there that made her skin crawl ( she also hates the winter now so she had to get as far away from snow as possible lmao ) and so she was like “alright i need a college on the west coast and w my dance major”, found crawford, and it was Settled

you ain’t getting my gossip blog secret out of me *wink*

anyways, now that the tragic backstory has been #unlocked...onto kaia

she’s the sanguine, which basically means bitch is a ball of sunshine, which she is — there’s no such thing as a stranger in her world, she likes constantly being surrounded by people ( bc she gotta make up for being lonely all those childhood years, thanks a ton dAN ) and making new friends and going out, she just loves people and people usually love her, she knows how to reel them in and keep them by her side, girlie will do Anything

she flat-out refuses to see the bad in people, even if it is staring her in the face, and this is where her stubborn nature comes in to play?? you can’t tell her anything, once her mind is set on something there is no hope of ever talking her out of it, she’s got to come to her senses on her own and even then it’s usually too late or she diminishes the impact of it?? she’s rash and got bad tunnel vision so it’s p clear where disaster lies w her

has the unhealthiest coping mechanisms on the history of the planet, tbh; she thinks the cure to everything is putting a smile on and acting like it’s not a problem and while that works when one fails a test, it doesn’t work w everything and she’s just forced so much pain and depression and anger down that it is Bound to come right back up at some point, so basically homegirl is a ticking time bomb

kaia’s also a people pleaser, she’d literally give you a kidney if you asked, which makes it easy for people to manipulate her?? and she doesn’t always see when she’s being manipulated either?? and won’t always stand up for herself when she’s being treated unfairly??? she just likes keeping the peace if at all possible

blurs the line a lot between doing things because she can and doing things because she feels an obligation to so she doesn’t let anyone down

ever since her parents died, she doesn’t like to give anything a second-guess — if she wants to do something, then she’s doing it, because it may not come back around again or she may not have the chance to. is the Definition of living in the moment, which is nice in theory, but kaia is v bad at compartmentalizing so it’s easy for her to get off track or ofc do things that will come back to bite her

dance is life, i’m not even gonna go into detail on it bc this is long enough already and like.....it’s just her whole world, ok, moving along

she wants everyone to let her in but she very rarely returns the favor, which is why i gave her the reticent trait?? she doesn’t tell people about her parents or her uncle, doesn’t let people see that iceberg of emotions underneath the surface, she acts like if it doesn’t exist then it doesn’t as far as anyone’s concerned???

girl is one of the greatest friends you could ever have but is a piece of work when you think about it, tbh, so that being said come love us !

and if you read this far: the reason this STUPID vine is my ooc tag is bc i have an ex named kyle who is a piece of trash and that vine is a p accurate description of how i feel about him.....plus it just makes me laugh ok going now

[chittaphonsai]

tagged by @dongsookies !!

hey hi sofia im arianne and i like using the brown crayon :// its not useless :/// like when u draw trees :// u need the brown crayon :// pls add facts to support ur statements :///  jk dont fite me; ur rlly cute i lowkey luf u thanks for tagging me !! 💌🌹💫🌙✨ 

rules: complete the survey and say who tagged you in the beginning. when you are finished you have to tag people to do this survey. have fun and enjoy!! 

1. are you named after someone? 

um,,,,,, not someone,,, but like,,,, a rocketship lmao, but true 

2. when was the last time you cried? 

literally yesterday iM SORRY during pe we were doing sprints i h8 sPORT and i ran 400m and was like fml aND THEN the teacher was like ok we have time for u to run 800m and i was like bs i just ran im not doin in again but bein the good student i am i was like yolo (lmao, im not sorry) and ran the 800m legit 5mins after running 400m and during like the last lap i started crying woop 

 3. do you like your handwriting? 

 its alrite :/// 

 4. what is your favorite lunch to eat? 

i lov to eat everything but ill let u want i dont like - sandwiches and tomatoes :///  

5. do you have kids?

um,,,, the dream boys my smol sons ¿? nope im like 7 (disclaimer: im not actually 7 lmao)

6. if you were another person, would you be friends with you? 

i h8 myself so like no ¿? jk im rlly fun LMAO I HOPE SO so i probably would tbh

7. do you use sarcasm? 

too often; i reply with sarcasm at sarcasm so people think im bein serious woop 

8. do you still have your tonsils? 

mhm 

9. would you bungee jump? 

id like to say i would,,,, but probably not lol 

10. what is your favorite kind of cereal? 

cocoa pop or crunchy nut :))) 

11. do you untie your shoes when you take them off? 

most of the time yep bc i tie my shoes rlly tight lol 

12. do you think you’re a strong person? 

physically - no, emotionally - nOPE LMAO 

13. what is your favorite ice cream flavour? 

mango sorbet and baskin robin’s pink lemonade 😩👌🏼💦👅 i like sour flavours woop but if they dont have those i usually get chocolate chip cookie dough 

14. what is the first thing you notice about people? 

the shape of their face (lol does that sound creepy???) and also their voice and the way they act nd speak lmao

15. red or pink? 

i lov wearing red and i lov just lookin at different shades of pink (it’s a soft colour, it makes me soft :’)))

16. what is the least favorite physical thing you like about yourself? 

probably the shape of my face, its rlly round lol 

17. what color pants and shoes are you wearing now? 

im wearing denim shorts and maroon converse my parents forced me outside bc they wanted to catch the new pokemon :/// (update: bad idea; i have 2 huge mosquito bites now rip)

18. what was the last thing you ate? 

mango !! ( ok but why are mangoes so expensive here :// ) 

19. what are you listening to right now? 

a supplementary story : you never walk alone - bts 

20. if you were a crayon, what color would you be? 

idk maybe yellow ????? bc everyone knows theres yellow but they dont rlly use it except for colouring the sun or smth bc u cant rlly see it on white paper; like its acknowledged but ignored and i can relate to it on a spiritual level crayon philosophy w arianne, wHY AM I LIKE THIS LMAOAOAO

21. favorite smell? 

i lov fruity scents and atm i lov the pink grapefruit mist from body shop it smells so nice agsgsjsksk 

22. who was the last person you spoke to on the phone? 

my mum 

23. favorite sport to watch? 

 ,,,,,,sport ¿? 

24. hair colour? 

vvvvvvv dark brown 

25. eye colour? 

vvvvvvv dark brown 

26. do you wear contacts? 

i dont wear contacts but i do wear glasses 

27. favorite food to eat?

noodles w soup especially when its cold :’)))

28. scary movies or comedy?

romantic comedies :)))

29. last movie you watched? 

hyung; the one kyungsoo is in,,,,, its sO ANGSTY OHMYGAOAD

30. what color of shirt are you wearing?

its red and has tiny birds on it lol

31. summer or winter? 

winter !!! I HATE SUMMER with a firey passion lol get it bc its hot ;^)) australian summers are so sdkjhaskdjh and i have no air conditioning rip

32. hugs or kisses? 

hugs :’))) ♡

33. what book are you currently reading?

i used to read alot of real books but now i dont lmao but the last real book i read was love charms and other disasters by kimberly karalius and i loved it !!

34. who do you miss right now?

tEN WHERE ARE U

35. what is on your mouse pad? 

i dont have one woop

36. what is the last tv program you watched?

i was catching up on mkr (i love cooking reality shows lmao) but i also rewatched some of married at first sight (bc aw¿ some of the couples are rlly cute but i live for drama bYE) i usually dont watch actual tv shows lol

37. what is the best sound?

keyboards typing or like rain if the first one was a too weird lmao

38. rolling stones or the beatles? 

im not a fan of either,,,,,,,,

39. what is the furthest you have ever traveled?

australia to singapore to philippines to hongkong - alot of connecting flights but it was funnn !!

40. do you have a special talent? 

leaving an assignment till the last day then spending the whole night before doing all of it w/ minimal emotional breakdowns lmao woops but in all honestly im also pretty good at pen twirling spinning ?? :)))

41. where were you born? 

i was born in the philippines, but i live in australia woop 

42. people you expect to participate in this?

@ncshi, @itshaechan, @yutasings, @omfgten only if u want to~ :) ♡

i ramble too much and this is a good example of that fact woops