#and and jingle missing her bubba

[captain-amadeus]

I promise to continue watching stf anyways

[rejaytionships]

f/o tags

here you can find all of my selfship tags!

key:

🌿 SONA TAG

💀 romantic

💙 crush

💗 queerplatonic

✨ platonic

🍧 familial

-~-~-

Baldi's Basics

🌿 [STELLA / THE SUBSTITUTE TEACHER OF SOMETIMES] 🌿

💀 All Staff x Stella [baldicule]

Black Butler

🌿 [ONÓRA GALLAGHER] (they/he) 🌿

💀 Grell x Onóra [seeing red]

Creepypasta / Slenderverse

🌿 [AUSTIN MCLOVIN / JINGLE] (le/they) 🌿

💀 Tim/Masky x Austin/Jingle [austim]

El Tigre

🌿 [GENESIS O'SHAUNESSY] (any) 🌿

💀 Maria x Rodolfo x Genesis [shauneveras]

Fairly Oddparents

🌿 [MR. HUNTER] (he/they?) 🌿

Five Nights at Freddy’s

🌿 [KYRA MCALISTER] (she/they) 🌿

💀 Sundrop x Kyra [sunray]

Invader Zim

🌿 [CRO MCGOVERN] (she) 🌿

💀 Professor Membrane x Cro [camr]

💗 Mr. Elliot x Cro [caeq]

Pokémon

🌿 [TRAINER LINN] (they/any) 🌿 = SINNOH (+ HOENN/JOHTO/KANTO)

💀 Bill x Linn [beeshipping]

💀 Proton x Linn [atomicshipping]

💙 Roark x Linn [lazulishipping]

💗 Jessie & James & Linn [triplethreatshipping]

🍧 Byron & Linn [steel foundations]

🍧 Crasher Wake & Linn [tidefamily]

🍧 Giuseppe & Linn [dazzioling gleam] ---

🌿 [AUSTIN RENÉE] (they/ve/any) 🌿 = UNOVA (+ KALOS)

💀 Emmet x Austin [reviveshipping]

💗 Carrie x Austin [gigglesounova]

🍧 Burgh & Austin [bugfamily]

✨ Elesa & Austin [electric boogie]

✨ Ingo & Austin [supporting ‘rails] ---

🌿 [RUTH ELLIOT] (she/he) 🌿 = UNOVA

💀 Clay x Ruth [businessshipping]

Lacey & Ruth [every girlboss has a girldaughter] ---

🌿 [FISHER ATWATER] (he/she) 🌿 = GALAR

💀 Melony x Fisher [icebergshipping]

🍧 Gordie & Fisher [rock n’ roll] ---

🌿 [ODETTE] (they/she) 🌿 = POGO

💀 Professor Willow x Odette [fieldshipping]

🍧 Blanche & Odette [lakefamily]

✨ Candela & Odette [red hot chilly feathers]

✨ Spark & Odette [fly high voltage]

Resident Evil

🌿 [ILONA POWERS] (she) 🌿 > AU: [THE COUNTESS] (she)

💀 Albert x Ilona [wowers]

💀 Albert x Excella x Ilona [wowionne]

💀 Jill x Ilona [valentowers]

💀 Luis x Ilona [luilona]

💀 Lady Dimitrescu x Ilona [alcilona]

🍧 Jake & Ilona [missing link]

🍧 Keegan & Ilona [the fire burns anew] ---

🌿 - no s/i - 🌿

💙 Nemesis [got you some black and blue]

Slasher Stuff

🌿 [CAROLYN LEWANDOWSKI] (she) 🌿

💀 Bubba x Carolyn [sunflowers] ---

🌿 [CELINA KAMINSKI] (she) 🌿

💀 Brahms x Celina [wallflowers]

Star Wars

🌿 [IMROS KATARD] (she/he/they) 🌿

💀 Boba x Imros [bobros]

💀 Boba x Sintas x Fennec x Imros [my three bounty-hunter girlfriends. and yes they hunt bounties]

✨ Imros & Her Team (GEN TAG) [girl gang]

💗 Cih & Imros [green beans] ---

🌿 [KELESGAN SELDLOS] (she/he) 🌿

💀 Hera x Kanan x Kelesgan [kanlesgera]

💀 Kallus x Kelesgan [kelesandr]

💀 Vizago x Kelesgan [kelzago]

🍧 Maul & Kelesgan [maulicious apprenticeship]

Stardew Valley

🌿 [OSMODIUS] (any) 🌿

💀 Pierre x Caroline x Osmodius [ozshopping]

🍧 Abigail & Osmodius [the uncle that stepped up]

Super Mario

🌿 [MISTRESS MELON] (she) 🌿

Wynncraft

🌿 [RHOSWEN] (they) 🌿

[OC F/OS]

🌿 [VALERIE J DESROSIERS] (she) 🌿

💀 David x Valerie [my delightful neighbor david]

-~-~-

COUGARVERSE

(cougar and her ship tag are all for the fusionfall timeline, and all others will be categorized separately, but all of the pairings whether in their timeline or the fusionfall timeline are a part of the cougarverse)

🌿 [COUGAR VON MOM] (she/they) 🌿

GEN SHIP TAG: [mothersville]

Chowder

🌿 [GELATO] (any) 🌿

💀 Endive x Gelato [heaven’s kitchen]

💀 Mung Daal x Truffles x Gelato [heaven's other kitchen]

Codename: Kids Next Door

🌿 [ARNIE TREIZE] (she/any) 🌿

💀 Father/Benedict x Arnie [she’s the man]

💗 Toiletnator/Lou & Arnie [royally flushed]

Ed Edd n Eddy

🌿 [LINDA KANKER] (she) 🌿

🍧 Double D "Dee" & Linda [dee is for daughter]

---

tags no longer in use

[🎈 if i no longer associate with source | 🌱 for if i just don't have attachment to the source or f/o anymore]

🎈 Mandela Catalogue 🎈

🌿 [VALERIE DESROSIERS] (she) 🌿

💀 Alt!Gabriel x Valerie [rosemary]

[bokutokiya]

EXTRA: mysterion

(TW: blood, fighting, and swearing)

Takes place in Middle school (15- Kenny/y-n, Karen 12)

You shake your boots off as you move to adjust your beanie, South Park was in one of its colder days as the season shifted from spring snow to snow snow. Letting out a breath and watching it spiral as you cross over the railroad tracks you missed the small brunette blurr that body slams you back into a snow pile, letting out a loud ‘oof’ sound you allowed the giggling child to sit on your stomach for a moment as you smile. The small brunette one Karen McCormick let her little dimples show as you heft her into your arms and get up. “Hello Kare bear! How are you today?!” You ask as you gently squeeze your self proclaimed sister, your parents passed away a year ago and the McCormicks keep an eye on you as another one of their kids. You shift Karen to your back as you continue walking, she takes up playing with your hair. “I’m doing good, Kenny says you’ve been sad.” She says as she tries to peek into your face, her pigtails tickling your cheeks causing you to laugh softly. “I’m okay, better that I get to spend the day with you.” You smile at the little girl before knocking on the mcCormicks door. The door is opened by an unnaturally red headed lady with a kind smile, “Y/n! Thank you for coming tonight. Kenny is staying with the boys for a school project and unfortunately Stewart and I have a meeting to attend, so we’ll be home late. Feel free to help yourself in the kitchen and if we aren't back by 10 feel free to sleep in Kenny’s room, you know where everything is sweetheart” Carol says before letting you step in and set Karen on the floor. Stewart came past and ruffled your hair before walking out the front door with Carol, turning to Karen you smile and place a hand on her head, “what should we do squirt?” You ask playfully as she bats your hand away. “Let’s go to the park then maybe Stark's pond” she says before racing into her room and coming back with a small backpack you hadn’t seen before, “who got you the pretty backpack?” You ask with an eyebrow raised. Karen smiled brightly and held it up “bubba butters gave me it for my birthday! Oh! And thank you for the hoodie y/n! I’m saving it for a special occasion!” She cheers before putting the backpack on, you slide your wallet and an extra jacket into the bag for you before grabbing her hand and leaving the house. The park was empty when you arrived, you took the backpack for her as she raced off to the play set, for a young teen she loved playgrounds. You scrolled through your phone sending a small update text to Kenny to let him know you guys were ok.

After updating your social you look up only to not see Karen. You panic for a moment and look around wilding for her only to see her pop out of the bathroom and jog her way over. You quickly pull her into a hug, her face smashed into your chest, “please let me know when you wander off next time Kar, scared the shit out of me baby.” you say, calming your heart beat. Karen quickly grabbed your arm and hung on it “I’m sorry y/n! I’ll be more careful!” She claims before you two start walking towards tweak Bros coffee, you open the door, the bell jingling your arrival. “ACK, y/n! How are you tonight!” Tweek calls from behind the counter as you bounce over and pull yourself up to sit on it. “I'm a great tweekers, where’s Craig?” You notice a lack of middle fingers being thrown your way, tweek shakes his head “he’s home, had detention so he didn’t come by to help out” he replies easily calming in your presence, handing you a hot cocoa for Karen, which she happily takes. “Well we just came by to say hey, kens staying over at Cartmans so I’m dragging Karen around.” You say. He nods and waves you guys out as you leave into the darkening day. Rounding the corner from the theater a hand shoots out and yanks you and Karen back into the alleyway, Karen lets out a startled scream before her mouth is covered. “hello Y/n.” A familiar voice calls out from behind the scared girl, your face goes from anger to terror in 3 seconds as you discreetly slip the tracker/alarm from the strap of the backpack pressing it. “Hello Kalma. It’s been a while, come back to finish me off?” You ask, shaking lightly, Kalma lets out a hard biting laugh before throwing Karen off to the side and stalking closer to you “I wish I could finish you off! But you have a use for the plan. Doesn’t mean I can’t hurt you a little” she laughs bitterly before leaping towards Karen, the younger girl crying in terror. You make a split second decision and place your body in front of Karen’s, a sharp stinging pain hits your side as you start to feel a warm spot on your hoodie. “Damn, Kenny’s gonna be pissed I got blood on another of his hoodies” you try to joke out, looking down at Karen. The younger girl can’t tear her eyes away from the injury on your side so you cover her eyes and whisper “run back to tweak bros, tweek can call our angel.” She gives a nod and takes off, allowing you a moment to turn to Kalma. “You just don’t go down huh?” She asks bitterly “just like your parents, maybe you’ll be more challenging then them after all.” you see red at her statement before tackling her onto the ground and swinging your fist into her face landing a couple of blows before she twists the object in your side flipping you onto the wet and dirty pavement. She opens her mouth to say something else when a shout comes from above “I’d step away from the girl if I were you!” Mysterion’s voice is hard to miss and brings a small painful smile to your face as Kalma scoffs. “Whatever I’m done with her.. for now” she laughs before vanishing down the end of the alleyway. Rapid footsteps make their way down the alley as Karen crash’s into you as you grunt. “Let’s get home” you say to her softly, looking into the worried eyes of mysterion.

After getting Karen home and settling into bed, you heave yourself into Kenny’s room and start digging for his first aid kit when the window slides open. You look up and meet the eyes of mysterion, you let out a small painful laugh as you plop on the floor. “Hey Kenny. Guess I lied about nothing happening” you say roughly, Kenny takes his hood and mask off before rushing over and kneeling next to you, “shit y/n how did this happen?” He asks, sliding back into his smooth tone. You yank the hoodie over your head letting him see the injury better “took the knife to keep Karen safe, Kalma went for her first.” You hiss out as he gently pokes around the wound. Kenny shakes his head before pulling out the first aid kit from his closet along with another one of his hoodies, “of course you did, thank you for that but I’m still and you're hurt” he says in a gentle yet stern tone causing you to laugh. Kenny quickly cleans and wraps your side before helping you struggle on his hoodie and pulls you into a light hug, his face burrowed into your hair as he shakes trying to suppress sobs, “when Karen called I thought the worst, I’m so glad you're ok.” He says, before pulling back and looking over your face. You give him a smile and press a light kiss to his cheek, “remember ken, who is responsible for your missing tooth? I think I can handle myself.” You tease him lightly before he helps you to settle into his bed. He threads his fingers lightly through your hair as you start to feel tired from pain and all the energy you used, “y/n, I love you, your family and I will ALWAYS be there to protect you. Please be safe and sleep well bubba” he whispers, pressing a kiss to your forehead and covering you with the blankets before sliding back out of the window to let you rest.

[winphoria]

na family daycare

na jaemin, nct dream

word count: 940

"hey nana, i'm back!”

the keys jingled as you dropped them on the shelf. you kicked off your shoes, sighing at how dirty they got in the pouring rain. you closed your umbrella and placed it to the side to dry. as you hung up your old coat, three little children ran up to you, exclaiming ‘hello’s while one even hugged your right leg.

“hi y/n!! i missed you!” the child on your leg, joy, said as she squeezed your leg even more.

“aw…” you smiled at her gesture. you knelt down and gave joy a proper hug. “i missed you too, bub.”

“how was your class today, y/n? was it fun?” one of the other children asked in childlike curiosity, looking up at you in wonder. you chuckled, since lectures from your 80-year-old professor on psychology were not typically described as “fun.”

“it was...interesting," you replied to the little girl, amy, the oldest of the bunch. “how about you guys?” you pinched the boy next to amy on his cheek, brian, as he giggled. “was nana fun today? or was he booooring?” you teased. the three children giggled even more.

“i heard that!” jaemin yelled from the kitchen.

“alright, let’s go back to what we were doing, my loves. you don’t want mr. boring to be mad!” you warned jokingly.

“that too!” he yelled again. the kids scurried back to the kitchen in laughter, you following along.

in the kitchen was a frazzled jaemin, sleeves rolled up and looking like he desperately needed a nap, but still charmingly handsome as he spoon-fed the daycare’s youngest in a bib and high-chair. the green kids’ table across the room was topped with three bowls, all filled with various amounts of food.

“here comes the airplane!” jaemin cooed as he brought the spoon to the one-year-old’s mouth. “mmmmmm, so yummy!”

jaemin turned his head to the three kids.. “guys, are you eating your soup?” he asked across the room gently.

“yeeees, nana!" joy, brian, and amy said in unison.

you leaned on the doorframe leading into the kitchen. “hey, nana.” you grinned at the chaotic yet adorable atmosphere of the room.

“hey, y/n. no hug?”

you looked jaemin up and down to see a fresh green stain on him. “pass. you have baby food all over your apron.”

the three children tried to hide their laughter as they continued eating in their seats. jaemin looked down and groaned.

“fine. but you...” jaemin pointed the used baby spoon at you. “go get dressed and get started on your studying. don’t you have an exam this week? i don’t want you going to bed at 3 again, y/n...”

“yeah…” you avoided his eyes in guilt. he was always trying to get you to focus on school. what a dad. “you sure you don't need help though? you look like you have your hands full.”

jaemin puffed out a breath. he knew you knew he was exhausted, but he didn’t want to admit it. he was your best friend. you could read right through him, for god’s sake. avoiding the question, he turned to the sink to start washing the stacks of dishes. 

"kiiids!" he yelled out over the sound of the water pouring. "put your bowls here when you're done! and clean up after yourselves, please! especially you, brian. don't leave crumbs of sticky rice on the floor. we might step on them, bubba."

you raised a brow when he glanced back at you. he needed help, and it was obvious.

“really, i’m fine, y/n. the storm meant a bunch of parents calling in and having their kids stay home, so today the number's a little low. it's just the twins, joy, and —” he twisted he head to coo at the baby once more. “ —wittle baby luna here today.” he grinned his classic, loving smile at luna, unintentionally showing off his perfect white teeth.

ugh. there he was being too stubborn/humble to accept help again. you gave up on insisting. “alright. but let me know if anything, nana.” you said as you trudged down the hallway to your small room.

“thanks, y/n.” he said over the kids’ chatter before you shut your door.

damn. jaemin read right through you too. of course he did, you’re his best friend. the truth was, you were actually really overwhelmed lately. it's almost midterms and you haven't been getting much rest. it didn't help that seoul was going through a major storm and it was pouring every day.

so it was refreshing to come home everyday to the sight of your best friend and little children that love you back unconditionally.

na jaemin inherited his parents’ well-known daycare business. he was raised in the na family daycare along with the other kids they took care of, one of them being yourself. now, jaemin willingly runs it full-time, with some help from his college student best friend when you're not studying or sleeping.

you were lucky to have jaemin. dorming at your university is incredibly expensive, and it was extremely difficult finding a job in seoul. jaemin welcomed you back to the daycare you met at with open arms (and a monthly check). since then, you two have gotten far more close.

so as you got dressed and opened up your psych book for the next few hours of reading, you thought about how thankful you were for all the children you took care of and their constant hugs. you also thanked the universe for blessing you with such a kind, loving, and perfect best friend, na jaemin.

[cocojimin]

Terrible Twos-Multiplied

Italicized means in the past & I’m now making this a canon series with extras!

Terrible Twos

Part 1/ Part 2/ Part 3

Request or Chat

Masterlist

-1 month later-

After a small promotional tour,your life felt like it was finally back to its ‘normalized’ state. Even though Calum would be away at the studio for most of the day,he was always back home for dinner. 

You could always be happy at the thought of having family dinner,but the truth is that you needed Cal the most in the morning. Something has been off about you for the past 2 weeks,you haven’t been feeling your best. 

Any food you had the night before would be in the toilet by sunrise. You clothes don’t fit how they used to and your shoes are getting slightly tighter. Exhaustion would set in before the dinner was even prepared and you could honestly eat all day. You never told Calum about these happenings,even though you thought it was extremely weird. 

Handling it yourself would probably be the best idea since Calum tends to worry too much. 

After he left for the studio and you puked in the toilet,you decided to call somebody who was good at helping you on the low: Crystal. She promised she was going to bring over a couple pregnancy tests and some food for a full blown ‘find out if Y/N is pregnant mission’.

This entire ordeal was very similar to how you found out you were pregnant with Jaxon a couple years ago. 

You got pregnant on accident. After a Halloween party at his bandmate Ashton’s house,you could tell that something was off about your husband. The night was filled with drinking and Calum saying things you thought he didn’t mean. 

You didn’t drink much though,only a glass of champagne while Calum took shot after shot. 

When the party started dying down,you decided it would be best if the two of you leave,seeing as Calum could barley hold himself up on his two feet. Kisses and hugs were exchanged between the boys and their significant others as you helped Calum out of the hot house and into your car. 

The entire drive home,he couldn’t stop staring at you and caressing your thigh under the material of your dress. Walking him through the door was worse though,as he latched his long arms over your shoulders and kept whispering about how much he wanted you,how much he needed you. 

You thought a shower would sober him up,but that just led to you getting pulled in. It was passionate,steamy,and long winded. He couldn’t stop saying how much he loved you,and how he was going to show you.

The very next day after your long night,you realized that he didn’t use protection. Your thoughts were quickly discarded as he woke up and rolled over onto you,giving you sweet pecks in the crook of your neck. 

He cuddled into you before murmuring something about having to go to Ashton’s house later. Looking on at your husband getting dressed,you thought it couldn’t be that bad if you finally had your first child together. The house did feel empty at times with only the two of you occupying it.

 Sure it would be a challenge with tour and fame,but you knew in your heart that what happened last night was purely fate. Deciding to wait until the next day to see if you were pregnant,you called Crystal and asked her to meet you at a restaurant so you could talk. 

Over lunch,you let her know about your possible pregnancy and the events that led up to it. She told you that she would get Cal out of the house and come over with tests to finally know. The next day,Crystal and Michael came knocking on your door,Mike grabbing Calum and telling him he had a whole day planned and Crystal plopping down on the couch. 

“You told Michael?” 

“Nope,I told him that he deserved a boys day with his bestfriend.”

-

The tests were taken,and your heart was pounding against your chest. ‘Another baby?’ you thought as Crystal sat on the floor of your bathroom. You had 6 minutes until the results would show up on the tests. Jaxon was down for a nap and Calum wouldn’t be home for hours,so you had more than enough time. 

“What if I am pregnant? The boys are finishing up an album and will be going on more promotional tours and an actual tour and i’ll be here. I don’t want Calum to miss out on the milestones or even the birth,” you chocked out as a sob came ripping from your throat. 

This was one of your biggest fears coming true. With Jaxon it was easier since it happened at the end of tour and the start of a break,but this possible baby would be thrown for a loop. The ringing of the alarm cut your overthinking short; the results were done. Crystal perked up and grabbed her phone,starting to record like she did last time. 

“Okay Y/N,what are we doing?” Crystal asked behind the phone,giggling as she zoomed in on your distressed face. 

“Um...We’re gonna see if I’m pregnant with Hood #2” Your palms were sweaty as you picked up the four tests with trembling fingers. 

Pregnant.

Pregnant.

Pregnant.

Pregnant.

Your mind stopped working as tears of joy leaked through your eyes,causing Crystal to ask incessantly what they said. Another baby would join your family and the emotions were swirling. 

Turning the four tests around to face the camera,you flashed a happy and watery smile. Crystal squealed and stopped recording,wrapping you up and a loving hug. Leaning down to your stomach she started to talk to the new baby. 

“Hi new baby,I’m you aunt Crystal. No matter what,you will be loved little one.” You were so happy that there was going to be another Hood in the household,growing your small family.

A few hours went by and you were home alone with Jaxon and Duke after Crystal left. Before she parted,she helped you hide the tests in a spare makeup pouch that was stored in your nightstand. 

You were now in the bathroom again,but this time you were washing Jaxon up. He was full of energy and wanted to splash around in the bubbly tub with his boats and action figures after he was squeaky clean. Deciding it was a good idea to left him deplete his energy,you sat against the toilet and pulled out your phone.

 Calum sent you a text,telling you that he would be home with takeout in a few and that tomorrow night everybody wanted to have a fancy dinner to celebrate the completion of the album. You thought it would be the perfect time to announce the coming of a new Hood to this family. 

Just as you were wrapping Jaxon in a fluffy towel,jingling keys and Duke could be heard from downstairs; Calum was home. He could heard stomping up the stairs with his leather boots and walking into the bathroom. 

Jaxon saw his Daddy and wiggled from your grip and jumping into his arms,keeping his towel on his little frame as he shivered. 

“Hello my clean bubba,how are you?” Calum asked,walking his son into his bedroom and sitting the boy on the bed. 

“Good Dada,Missed you!” Jax couldn’t stop giggling as Calum got him dressed,tickling him in the process. All your mind could think about was how a new baby would come into this equation.

When you first had Jaxon,the new father and son interactions made your heart flutter. Calum was so careful and attentive with his baby,always wanting to hold him and show him off to his millions of adoring fans. 

He had a folder in his phone with nothing but pictures and videos of his baby boy. Calum spoiled him rotten from the day he entered the world,turning into a soft dad all for his first child. 

You knew baby Hood would get their parents love plus their brothers love. 

All you doubts started to float away as Calum snapped you out of your trance. You looked up to find Jaxon asleep in his bed,cuddled up to a teddy bear and Calum leaning over the bathroom doorway staring at you. 

“What’s the matter doll? You’re very quiet tonight hmm?” Calum walks in and scoops you up,pressing a warm kiss to your lips,making you melt in his arms. 

“I’m fine Cal,Just really tired,” 

“Okay love,wanna have dinner in bed?” You smiled,nodding as he takes you to the bedroom,laying you on the fresh sheets and walking back out. 

The Tv was turned on as Calum came back into the room,takeout bags in hand with half a smile on his face. The rest of the night was spent watching a baking show and giggling at every joke.

Soon the food was discarded and the lights were turned off. Cal took off his clothes and slid into bed next to you,chest pressed against your back. You could tell he dozed off when his small snores were heard. 

Unconsciously though,his hand drifted down to rest on your stomach. 

You couldn’t wait until tomorrow where you would get to tell him and everyone your unplanned surprise.

[clown-bait]

Paranormal Journeys Part 6 (Monster Roommate AU)

So it took me a month to get this done because I have had one hell of a busy time these past few weeks. Also the massive writers block that didn't help. But anyway last time Leech did some snooping in the library under the clowns big red nose. Penny had to come save his trashpire from being discovered by Mike Hanlon who had already learned quite a bit already about what the clown has been up to. Leech flipped out and attacked everyone after waking up sick and hangry turns out theres some weird deadlight shit going on with her and surprise surprise no one is being helpful. Ok I think everyone is caught up now sorry for you new people if this is confusing as fuck. I’ll try not to go so long in between chapters again!

Part 6 Freddy Gets Laid

Pennywise returned to the main room in an eerily good mood despite what had just happened. Granted any good mood of his came off as eerie but this was especially cheerful for him. In fact he was practically glowing. “Where’s my Peachy?” he purred in a dream like state.

“You just missed her said somethin’ about getting someone to eat.” Chucky said stabbing Freddy for the 10th time as his wife filmed him.

The clown’s good mood came to a screeching halt. “SHE WHAT?”

“What she's a big girl Jingles she can handle herself. Look what she did to all of us!” Tiff blew a puff of smoke

“YOU PEOPLE JUST LET HER LEAVE? IN HER CONDITION? AND NO ONE SAID ANYTHING OR TRIED TO STOP HER?”

“Eh we kinda did? I don't know we were talking about Fangs PMSing, Freddy called my wife a bitch and she just sorta left.”

“You are all dead when I return from fetching her.” the clown growled and vanished.

“How many times has he threatened our lives this week?”Chucky asked the group

“I think this is number eleven” Tiff answered him. Leatherface shook his head and held up one and two fingers. “Oh shit is it really up to twelve?! Hey I might win the pool!” Freddy shouted happily

“Ah ah! I had thirteen! I'm in the lead!”

“Drac, I guarantee you he will threaten all of us again at least four more times by Sunday this is Jingles were talking about.”

“Not if he's in a good mood, and trust me he will be in a great mood”

“What is the circus in town or something?”

Dracula gave his roommate a catlike smile “I will let you all figure it out.” he said drifting out of the room leaving his friends to put the pieces of the puzzle together for themselves.

—————————

Leech shivered to herself as she walked along the snowy path through the woods near Neibolt street. She decided to cut through the gravel pit by the town dump maybe find an unfortunate dumpster diver no one would miss. Anything to silence this damn hunger. If leftovers couldn't stop the gnawing pain then fresh meat would, it always does.

Sure enough she came across a few homeless. Oddly she could tell their mood before even looking at their faces. This one was bored, another tired, one was extremely high and euphoric all smelled horribly unappetizing. Leech pulled on her beanie a bit tighter as a chill filled the air she had forgot to put on warmer clothes that weren't just sweats and a jacket not really suitable for winter in Maine. Hopping in the sewer wouldn't make things better its colder down there than it is up top and no doubt shed run into Penny who would most likely insist she return home after what just happened at the house. She didn't want to deal with him right now she just wanted to let predatory instinct guide her thoughts. Maybe she just needed to chase down and sink her teeth in someone. That had to be the reason for her weird behavior she's kept the beast cooped up for too long time to let it out.

Leech walked along the tree line staying just out of sight of the road till she came across a runner in the distance in a rush to get home. She's afraid of the dark. The vampire said to herself. “Wait how did I know that?” she said aloud. Leech brought her good hand to rub her head. The things that were happening to her…they were very…Penny. Was he somehow doing something to her? She did apparently get exposed to his deadlights just now but she technically wasn't conscious for it. Whatever he was doing one monstrous transition was enough in her life and this needed to come to a stop.

A warm scent brought her out of her thoughts as fast footsteps drew her focus back to reality. Savory flavor filled the air and a warmth creeped through her from the back of her skull to her face lighting her eyes up gold. She began to salivate as the runner came closer and the vampire stood still against the trees. She almost didn't recognize her own words leaving her mouth as the runner crossed her path.

“Better run faster!” she said in a hiss her prey slowed her pace.

“Pardon me?”

“It'll be night soon. Don't slow down” the vampire whispered “Don't slow down or the things in the dark will catch up!” Leech giggled to herself, Pennywise eat your heart out.

“WHOS THERE!?” the woman called out.

“No one else but the night and me” came a sweet whisper. “Won’t you join me for a moon lit walk? I’ll keep the other monsters away!” the words were like honey flowing through the humans brain she wandered into the woods in a trance like state till she suddenly came to, not knowing how far in she had gone or why.

The woman swore she caught a glimpse of something standing behind the trees grinning at her but when she looked again it was gone. She tried to leave when she heard a snap like a large branch breaking. Then she heard a pop and something like the sound of meat being stretched. That’s when she saw the tall thing standing in the now shadowy woods with glowing eyes. Someone or something was stalking her and it had tricked her deep into the darkened forest away from safe things like cars or street lights. She was all alone in the dark.

As the woman turned a face popped out of the bush. It resembled a human but it was skeletal and bat-like, the mouth way too big for the face and long needle like teeth accompanied two large dagger like fangs in the front. “NiCe nIGhT FoR a jOG AiNT iT?!!” the thing said in a distorted voice as the woman shrieked. A claw grabbed her face and yanked her into the bush the runner fell on her stomach and tried to crawl away but Leech pinned her down with a long clawed foot. The vampire smiled wide and slowly dug her taloned toes into the woman’s back. Delicious red bubbled to the surface and the monster’s prey began to scream.

————————————

Pennywise tore through the sewer in a raging storm the likes of which the town of Derry had never seen. He was enraged, confused and worst of all he was afraid. He couldn't sense his mate despite knowing all that was going on in his town he couldn't find her. It could only mean the power she had been gifted with was growing and the clown felt both proud and intimidated by it. This little blessing had come at an inopportune time for this cycle. He was hoping this…development…. would have happened after the seven were long and dead, but beggars cant be choosers and Pennywise could find a way to use this to his advantage somehow. The only issue he would run into was how unpredictable it made his precious mate. She was a liability to herself and the entire monster community when he wasn't near her and now that she was unknowingly hiding her presence, she was even more dangerous.

The clown’s frantic searching was drawn to a halt when a delectable smell kissed the tip of his nose. It was fear no ,not just fear sheer panic and terror. Penny began to salivate excessively it smelled delicious! Who was causing so much horror? He had to know! He searched the town but couldn't see. He saw the woman but not her attacker. Then it dawned on him. “Leechie!” he hissed with a grin. Not only had he found her but she had caught him a delicious meal to steal! How thoughtful of her! She might take some convincing of course but she owed him anyway. Besides Pennywise could be very persuasive. The clown chuckled darkly to himself and whisked his form away to appear in the woods. There was a body mangled and shredded, definitely looked like her handiwork but there was no nosferatu.

Pennywise snarled and ripped a piece of flesh from the carcass. It was delicious, the clown grunted and tilted his head back letting the meat slide down his throat the flavor still dancing on his tongue. Since when did she get so good at scaring her food? He finished her abandoned leftovers as quickly as he could not passing up a free meal and continued his search. His town was small she couldn't be that hard to find. Could she?

Hours passed and the clown stumbled into his home alone. He had failed.

“Jingles! Where the hell have you been all night?” Chucky shouted from the couch

“I didn't find her.” Pennywise mumbled ego bruised and officially worried.

“I thought you knew everything clown. Whats the matter losing your touch?” Freddy jabbed a sharp elbow into Penny’s side the clown snarled at him.

“She is…changing its not my fault I cant sense her.”

“What your magic dick juice do something to her?”

The clown opened his mouth to speak then decided to close it. The dream demon wasn't wrong exactly.

“Look we may help you out Jingles but you're going to have to owe us big.” Chucky said sliding in to take advantage of Pennywise’s rare moment of weakness.

“I’m thinkin free months rent he seems desperate enough hon” Tiff grinned as she studied the eldritch’s expression.

“Bubba and I want to put a hot tub in the basement and have poker nights again.” Freddy sneered. (Poker night was banned when Dracula tried to bet his lands and summoned a windstorm in frustration when he was informed that Transylvania is owned by the country of Romania not him.)

“Again with the hot tub? You don't even live here Krueger!” Pennywise snarled he didn't need their help he was the superior being how hard was it to find one small vampire?….ok he needed some assistance.

“Come on clown say it.”

A frustrated growl rumbled in the clown’s throat. “I need….allies….”

“You need what now?” The dream demon grinned wide.

“Allies.”

“Now now Jingles we've been through way too much to be just allies.” Freddy teased and the clown bared his fangs more in rage and defeat.

“Find my mate and I will allow poker night to continue. That’s all you are getting.”

“I was looking for the word friends but I’ll take that deal.” the dream demon winked and faded away to his own realm leaving his “friend” to grimace in disgust.

——————————-

Chris the ghost hunter awoke in the chair he had fallen asleep in but not in the same room. He was actually pretty sure this wasn't even the same building. How the hell did he end up in a boiler room? The human got out of the old chair and began to look for an exit or a phone. He could at least try to call Z to come pick him up. He must have been sleep walking again…. but that still doesn't explain the chair. He glanced over to the side and saw the words poorly written on the wall in children’s multi colored chalk:

One, Two Freddy’s coming for you

The ghost hunter stepped back “Who the fuck is Freddy?” he said aloud. He heard twisting metal behind him and then saw a set of pipes reading:

Three Four better lock your door

“What the hell is this?” Chris yelled out but getting no response other than metal and steam.

“Five six grab your crucifix.” a familiar voice called to him from above.

“Z-ZANDER? IS THAT YOU?!” the ghost hunter shouted said figure appeared in the window like an angel coming to the rescue.

“Seven eight better stay up late.” Zander said in a calm dream like voice. The panicked ghost hunter rushed into his leaders arms hugging him tightly “Bro I thought I was a goner this place has got some serious bad vibes” Chris mumbled as a strong arm wrapped around his back. a hand brushed his cheek and Zander tilted his chin up to his own. “I'm here now you need to tell me where we were before all this” he said leaning closer

“Eh-Z what are you-”

“Chris how long have we been friends? Don't think I don't know. I’ve always known.”

“Z-Zee”

“Now tell me where we were so I can take us away from this place.”

“Ah-a farm…. you brought us all to a farm we were going to get the demon out of the girl”

“Such a good boy for daddy.” Zander cooed and pushed Chris’ hair back and leaned in so close the ghost hunter could feel the stubble from his friend’s face prick his lips. As Chris closed his eyes Zander’s voice changed and he could feel multiple sharp things caressing his backside “Nine ten never sleep again lover boy” a deep voice growled and suddenly burnt lips pressed against his. Chris began to scream.

——————————-

Freddy reappeared on the couch about 30 minutes later half out of breath. The dream demon removed his hat and pulled out his vape and taking a long drag. The room stared at him expectantly as he seemed to take his dear sweet time and relax.

“Well?” Pennywise impatiently growled.

“Well what?”

“The location Krueger where is she?”

“Jingles give me like 5 minutes to collect myself jesus! Its been awhile.”

“Been awhile since what?” Chucky asked

The dream demon didn't answer and took another long drag of vapor.

“Did….did you?” Tiffany made a face that looked both shocked and disgusted

“Relax it was just head.”

“You went and got laid instead of finding my Peachy?!?!?” The clown roared.

“Jingles I told you to fuckin relax!”

“Relax? RELAX HE SAYS HAHAHAHAHAH OH ILL RELAX YES YOU WANT THE CLOWN TO RELAAAXXX” Pennywise’s form began to fall apart teeth appearing in places teeth should not be on a face, multiple eyes grew on his large forehead.

“iS ThIS rELaXEd EnOUgH?”

“Jesus christ Jingles let me get some action for once. Your chick’s been snatched up and is at some farm. Something about getting the demons out or whatever. Put yourself back together drama queen this is embarrassing.”

The clowns eyes went completely blood red at the word farm and he began to twitch.

“A  W H A T?!”

---------------------------

HE MAD. Im pretty sure everyone has figured it out by now whats going on with Leech. And Freddy’s Pan AF in my HC (don’t worry it was consensual you'll see.) Next chapter I’ve been really excited about getting to because its gonna be a bit of a comedic torture scene! So get ready for that. Also Mikes gonna come back!

[westernmanews]

SPRINGFIELD, Mass. (WWLP) – The Dakin Humane Society is making room for pets who were left homeless by Hurricanes Irma and Harvey.

Dozens of cats found new homes Friday at special adoption events at Dakin shelters in Springfield and Leverett. People were able to adopt cats for just $5.

Many animal shelters in the South are overloaded from the recent hurricanes. The folks at Dakin held Friday’s event to make room for the animals that cannot stay in the South.

Jeannie Fleury of Chicopee was one of those who wanted to bring a new cat into her home.

“They’re wonderful companions, and I’m just looking for a cat that will enjoy being in my home, and not want to go out,” Fleury said.

The event runs through 5:30 in Springfield and through 4:30 in Leverett.

Adopt a cat for $5 at Dakin Humane Society on Friday

Brienne of Tarth - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Female Age: 8 years, 1 months

Alexandria - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Female Age: 1 year

Bart - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Male Age: 6 years, 1 months

Blackie - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Male Age: 1 year

Cleo - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Female Age: 9 years, 1 months

Bubba - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Male Age: 5 years

Boo - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Leverett: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Male Age: 2 years

Clipy - Domestic Medium Hair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Female Age: 12 years

Elvira - Manx Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Female Age: 6 years

Francesca - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Female Age: 10 years, 9 months

Franks aka "Frannie" - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Male Age: 9 years, 4 months

Geo - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Male Age: 4 years, 1 months

Jasper Johns - Domestic Longhair Mix Location: Leverett: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Female Age: 1 year

Jingles - Domestic Longhair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Female Age: 10 years

Kitty - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Female Age: 4 years

LaLa - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Female Age: 5 years

Lester - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Male Age: 2 years

Loki - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Leverett: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Male Age: 1 year

Lucky Duck - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Male Age: 1 year

Lyra - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Leverett: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Female Age: 10 years

Marshmallow - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Female Age: 2 years

Meeka - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Female Age: 8 years

Miss Kitty - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Leverett: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Female Age: 8 years

Nala - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Female Age: 2 years

Nene - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Male Age: 8 years

Opal - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Female Age: 4 years, 7 months

Opie - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Male Age: 3 years, 3 months

Pearl - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Female Age: 1 year, 5 months

Pebbles - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Female Age: 4 years

Pywacket - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Leverett: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Male Age: 1 year

Reese - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Leverett: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Female Age: 3 years

Rose - Domestic Longhair Mix Location: Leverett: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Female Age: 7 years

Rosie -Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Female Age: 1 year, 1 months

Shasta - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Female Age: 4 years, 3 months

Sheeska - Domestic Longhair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Male Age: 9 years, 10 months

Simba - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Male Age: 1 year

Tiana - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Leverett: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Female Age: 1 year

Tigger - Domestic Longhair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Male Age: 8 years

Tigger - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Male Age: 2 years, 11 months

Trouble - Domestic Longhair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Female Age: 5 years

Violet - Domestic Shorthair Mix Location: Springfield: Dakin Humane Society Gender: Female Age: 4 years, 3 months

[clown-bait]

A Very Monster Christmas (Monster Roommmate AU)NSFW

WHOS READY FOR A CHRISTMAS SPECIAL! So while I slack off on the main plot, here’s what happens over christmas for the residents of the Neibolt house. Family members visit and the clown learns how to ice skate. Its a fun festive time for all! Except for the people who died.... (This is a 3part special!)

A VERY MONSTER CHRISTMAS Pt1

Leech and Drac and Leatherface all fell through the door in the early morning of the old well house in a heap carrying bags upon bags of decorations and lights.

“Ok men! Battle stations! Bubba you get the bird to the freezer then help Drac with decor and I shall tackle the tree!”

“Let the festivities begin!” the vampire shouted happily digging out the most gaudy looking decor he could find.

The three broke and began flying around downstairs doing various Christmas themed actions. Pennywise was slowly making his way up the stars from the well cracking his joints and stretching after a long night of terrifying the children of the town.

“Well, well, look who's up early! Good morning to you my little hunter!” he purred making a beeline to his favorite young vampire. He wrapped his arms around his mate and let out a happy growl.

“What cha’ doing?”

“Celebrating the up coming holiday” Leech was struggling to pick up the tree she had picked out for the living room.

“Theres a holiday?” Penny picked up a few of the ornaments she had laid out biting one to see if it was edible.

“Christmas?”

“oh that one were everyone is obsessed with pine trees and worship a bearded man?”

“Yes that one”

“I’m rarely awake for it.”

“Pen? Is this going to be your first traditional christmas” Leech’s eyes lit up.

“You're going to make a big deal out of this aren't you?”

“abso-fucking-lutely” she plopped a santa hat on his head.

“Lucky meee.”

“Plug these lights in will you? Tell me if any aren't working!” she excitedly handed him a tangled mess of small lights.

“Woah we doing Christmas?” Chucky strolled in with a coffee

“Apparently.” the clown grumbled already getting tangled in lights.

“Chucky! Be a dear and put some ornaments up with Pen.”

“Who said I was helping” the clown snarled trying to get the lights off of him.

“I did, you're the only one who can reach the top of the tree Pen. I need your height I'm small and insignificant!”

“flattery will not convince me dear”

“I’ll bake you gingerbread cookies and do that tongue thing you like later” Penny’s eyes flicked to Leech and then the tree.

“Doll, Hand me that red decoration.”

“I’m not helping you get laid anymore.”

Penny snatched the box up himself and began hanging decor while Leech battled with the lights. The pair had made progress though the poor vampire was growing more and more frustrated with the plugs.

“Leech. Hey Leech! Leechie look!” he nudged her excitedly

“Penny I'm busy…”

“Just loooooook!!”

“Fine, what is it?”

She turned to look at Pennywise who was holding a large candy cane ornament over his crotch “What does this remind you of?! eheheheehehehehehheee!”

“PENNY!”

“Aww you don't like it? I dont blame you mines bigger.”

“PENNY PLEASE”

“You should see your face little one!”

“I AM TRYING TO KEEP THIS WHOLESOME”

Five or six more inappropriate jokes later they were almost finished. Leech handed Pennywise the star “Alright this is the last one you put up i want you to do it”

“Why? Is it important?

“You know… I actually have no idea? I think its because decorating is stressful or something.”

Pennywise unceremoniously plopped the star on the top of the tree.

“Ok done I want my reward. Cookies first.”

“Wait one last thing” she handed him a plant with a string attached to it. “Hang this in the doorway.”

“A plant?”

“Don't question it just do it.”

“I don’t understand the significance of this decoration.”

“ok don't move.” the vampire walked over to him under the doorway and beckoned for him to lean down. “Are you going to tell me about the plant now?”

“I figure I’d just show you what to do.”

The clown cocked an eyebrow as Leech traced her thumbs on his cheeks. He seemed to get the idea of what she was about to do and closed his eyes as her cold soft lips pressed into his. Pennywise let out a happy churr. “I like this plant” he growled into her mouth and deepened the kiss his large hand coming up to cradle the back of her head as the other cupped her backside.

“WOOOOH MISTLETOEEEE!” Freddy cheered

“Aww I think its sweet! Look at those two!” Tiff elbowed him hard.

Leech pulled away and turned to Freddy. “Don't worry Kruger you can have a turn with Pen after I'm done with him”

“I'm not kissing the clown.”

Penny made a disgusted face and shook his jingly ruffles Leech laughed and kissed him again. “I’m going to go make your cookies……. Be gentle with him Fred”

A half hour passed Pennywise impatiently popped his head into the kitchen.

“Done yet?”

Leech was sitting with her head in one hand joint shakily held in the other. She was staring at her phone in complete terror. The clown cocked his head and poked her. “Leech” he poked her again. “Leeeeeech!” she turned to stare at him.

“My mom decided to surprise me this year.” her voice was empty.

“And?”

“S-She’s in Bangor…”

Penny’s eyes grew wide.

“Is she coming…..here?”

“Yes. She insisted… I couldn't say no. She….She wants to meet you….”

“Flat meeting. Right now.”

————-

“So mom does not know I am undead nor does she know I live with murderers in a house thats barely still standing.”

“Does she know you're getting stuffed by an inter-dimensional clown every night?” Freddy laughed and leaned back against the couch.

“Freddy I swear to god if you mention anything about that I will peel your dick like a banana and feed the scraps to the cat.” Leech dug her claws into the old table.

“Damn Jingles your girl is kinky as fuck.”

“please don’t go there” Pennywise rubbed his temples

“So what are we going to do about it then?” Tiffany asked

“Pen’s going to help make an illusion that were all normal.”

“You sure you can manage that jingles?” Chucky asked.

“I’m the eater of worlds I can handle it. It’s just one human.”

“We’re so going to have to kill Leech’s mom” Chucky laughed.

“NO ONE IS KILLING MY MOM”

—

The preparations had been made everyone was in their human forms or somewhat. Penny was struggling with the illusion of such a massive scale. Leech could see him in deep concentration she was worried he wasn't going to be able to hold it for long.

“Hey you good?”

“F-FINE I'm good I'm fine” as he said that a section of the upper floor crumbled and fell.

“We’re going to have to kill my mom aren't we…”

Two kids resembling Chucky and Tiffany came charging into the room with rage.

“CLOWN! WHY AM I A CHILD” Chucky screamed.

“Look I'm doing bare minimum here doll.”

“GIVE ME BACK MY BOOBS RIGHT NOW!” Tiff was pissed and brandishing a switchblade.

The two angry children both had knives ready to stab Robert Grey in the face when the door rang.

“SHOW TIME PEOPLE! MURDER WEAPONS AWAY!”

Leech opened the door while fixing Robert’s coat.

“LUCY!”

“MOM!”

The two women embraced. Leech's mom was just like an older version of her but with wide hips a small waist and shoulder length wavy blonde hair. She wore a typical burgundy mom sweater and blouse with the most cliche of mom jeans.

“Oh sweetie I missed you so much!” Leech saw the door behind her crumble a bit and Robert’s eye twitch.

“Missed you too mom! Great to see you! Why don't we get you to your hotel and we can all catch up there!”

“Oh but I want to meet your friends!”

“Well there they are you saw them time to go!”

“Dear, proper introductions please.”

“Ok we got Fred, and Vlad their kids Chucky and Tiffany-“

“WAIT WHAT” Freddy and Dracula both said in unison.

“Go with it-“ Leech growled “Um thats Bubba, my landlord Robert and our cat Churchill is around here somewhere.”

“Lucy, which one is the one you're sleeping with?” her mom whispered.

“Mom!”

“Is he the tall one? He's handsome! Such big hands!” she looked Robert up and down.

“MOM”

“See where you get it from now Leech! Your mom’s a horn dog just like you!” Freddy laughed.

“FREDDY!” Leech roared while her mom awkwardly shook Leatherface’s hand

“She is not a horn-dog!” Robert hissed as the piano started to form cobwebs.

“GUYS!”

“She’s pretty bad Jingles” Chucky elbowed Robert in the leg.

“I……You know what actually yeah, she kinda is. Sorry love, you're a freak.”

“GUYS MOM IS RIGHT HERE!”

“Why do they keep calling you Leech?” Ms. Smith looked over at them.

“UM UH its a long story.” Leech felt a tooth start to grow in her mouth.

“MRS. SMITH NICE TO MEET YOU FINALLY.” paint peeled off the wall behind Robert as he interrupted.

“Its Ms. actually. You must be Robert Gray! My daughter’s handsome new man! She tells me so much about you!”

“Ha ha oh mom” Leech laughed nervously

Robert turned to Leech and as the floors faded. “What did you tell her about me?” he whispered. “We will talk about this later…” Leech hissed.

“Well are you going to show me around?”

A window re-broke somewhere upstairs.

“Lets um lets get dinner! first! I’ll call a cab!”

The old door burst back open “NEPHEW!”

“OH FUCK” Leech screamed in sheer terror. Uncle Penny strolled into the house in full clown gear. Several windows upstairs broke and the walls of the house creaked back to its decayed state.

“Nephew? Is your uncle a circus performer Robert?”

“Weeeeeellll helllooo hot stuff” Uncle Penny slid over to Leech’s mom

“Oh um hello?”  Leech twitched as Uncle Pen got uncomfortably close to her mom who was shocked and confused by the sudden invasion of a clown.

“U-Uncle Penny? C-can I have a word?”

“Sure Leechie I’ll humor ya.”

Freddy began to lose some of his skin and a scar started to form on Chucky’s face. Robert was struggling with holding so many illusions at once.

“Ok look were trying to convince my mom I live a normal happy healthy life so she’ll leave. If you're going to stay you gotta play along.”

“So why do I have to be apart of this?”

“You want a human outsider to know all about our little sanctuary then?”

“You’re the one bringing her here and breaking all the rules”

“She just showed up”

“Yeah and you didn't dispose of her vampire. I swear the only reason I put up with your stupid mistakes is because you're dating my nephew.”

“She’s my mom.”

“Wow my junior sure knows how to pick em’. I’ll give you a pass and play along only because I owe ya for helping me clear out my lair. Also I want a date with Ms. Smith. I'm going to be awake for another 2 years now that its winter and junior cant have all the fun.”

“SHE IS MY MOM”

“And you got her good looks doll-face. I'm starting to see why the twerp is so into ya.”

“UNCLE PEN REALLY?”

“I mean technically were the same being sooo the attraction does make sense.”

“I cant believe were having this discussion.”

Robert walked into the room with a forced smile on his face “Can we please go now? You've abandoned me long enough.”

“Your uncle has a crush on my mom.”

“Well I mean we are the same being….”

“OH MY GOD.”

———————

“Lucy dear you're not eating?”

“I'm fine” she wasn't fine she was starving. She could hear every heart in the room and could smell every blood type. What made matters worse the waitress was a virgin with the sweetest smelling blood and the reddest cheeks. She felt herself salivating beginning to fantasize about sinking her teeth deep into the girls neck. Leech kept thinking about feeling that initial break of the skin and the pop of her favorite vein. It was enough to get the vampire going into a complete frenzy. Robert Gray kicked her under the table when he noticed that her eyes were trained on the woman whenever she walked by. “Hungry dear?” he asked with an evil grin watching the waitress pour his water. “N-not at all.” Gosh those veins are big…. he chuckled. “I don't know you look rather peckish” Leech kicked him back hard.

“He is right dear you look very pale maybe you should eat something” her mother chimed in.

“You know maybe I just need to use the restroom excuse me…” she got up and practically ran to the nearest restroom frantically digging through her bag for her emergency flask. Leech began chugging it in an attempt to keep the hunger at bay. She peeked out and saw Robert casually talking with her mom. It was weird to see him being social. He gave her a golden eye flash and a grin, enjoying seeing her struggle with her true nature, the one he preferred. “Oh dear he is just lovely!” her mom said as she sat down “I’m so glad to see you've finally settled down after the whole Adam thing”

“Settled down?”

“Robert said something about moving in together and sharing the house?”

“Did he now?” she glanced over to the clown in disguise. “We talked about it ONCE but nothing is final. RIGHT DEAR?”

“Ha right guess I’m just excited.” he looked..nervous? She’d have to ask him about this later.

The waitress had come back and Leech’s eyes nearly rolled back into her skull from the smell. especially when she reached over the vampire to grab a menu, giving her the perfect view of her neck. Robert laughed at her as the waitress took orders. “Sir? How would you like your steak?” the creature in disguise smiled wolfishly “Blue. Practically mooing. Also no sides just meat” Leech’s mom gave him a strange look. “And you miss?”

“Um uh I’ll not have anything” except your pretty little heart on my plate.

“You sure dear you look so thin!” her mom placed a hand on her knee in concern.

“I’m sure mom”

“She’s right you know you are looking paler then usual darling maybe you should step out for some air.”

“Later.”

Leech scratched at her wig a bit. The clown was going to torture her about this she just knew it.

————-

When the food arrived Robert made a huge show of eating his steak letting the blood fall off each slice and making sure Leech was watching as he bit into it. She was losing her mind in her seat. Her mom rambled and Robert answered questions coming up with perfect lies. Leech saw a drop of blood on her lovers lips and felt like she was about to go full frenzy. When the waitress came by one more time to take their dessert orders that was when Leech stood up. “I need some fresh air.” she scurried out the back exit into an alleyway.

She poked her head back in looking for the virgin waitress. She needed to feed RIGHT NOW. “See me” she whispered the waitress looked up at her and walked over. Robert was watching the scene with absolute delight. “I dropped my contact can you come help me find it?” she asked hastily. It was a lame lure but Leech was desperate. The girl walked closer to the door. Almost there. “Help me I cant see” Leech’s eyes shined like two tiny moons in the night while a faint churr gurgled in the back of her throat. The door shut behind the waitress “Oh thank fuck” Leech purred and slammed the woman into the wall. She covered the girls mouth to muffle the scream and inhaled her neck flesh deeply. “God you smell so delicious human.” she licked the skin. “I'm going to savor every last drop of this.” Leech threw her own head back and extended her fangs. The poor sweet girl under her screamed and screamed but Leech pressed her hand into her mouth harder till the waitress was biting through it. She dove down and felt that sweet, sweet pop of the skin breaking till she hit what she was looking for. The vampire let the liquid life pour down her throat as she began to moan and growl in sublime satisfaction.

Leech felt a tap on the shoulder as she finished finding Robert standing behind her watching. “My, my, my love! What big teeth you have” he chuckled Leech turned and screeched at him. “Relax its me.” he gently wiped some of the blood off her cheek with a finger tasting it himself. “You've been gone a for a bit mom got worried. See you couldn't restrain yourself.” he pulled her into him “Mind if I have a better taste dear?” Leech nodded, still in a bit of a frenzy and Robert pressed his lips against hers. She brought her hands up to his jaw and ran blood covered fingers against the side of his face. “Mmm you know how I love seeing you at work little hunter.” he groaned into her mouth “You may be sloppy but the passion you put into the kill is irresistible” his eyes flashed yellow in the night. Robert cleaned some of the red off Leech’s neck and face with hot licks and kisses. “Sorry I'm a mess” she panted “I like messes, I get to clean them up” he growled into her ear before he continued to suck the warm blood off her neck. “Shit Pen! If my mom wasn't waiting I’d be begging you to fuck me right now in this alley.”

“We can send her a cab and take the long way home…. then you can watch me at work” the clowns voice had broken through near the end causing Leech to whimper a bit. He chuckled and groped her breast with a huge hand. “You like the clown more than this human don't you dirty girl?”

“Mmmm bet you want to see him hunt and kill again just like when I first tasted you,” he chuckled pressing a hand to her stomach. “how brave of you to approach a hungry monster like that. I could have torn you apart”

“W-why didn't you?”

He kissed her again pushing her into the wall.

“You changed. I should have taken you right then and there.” he snarled. Grinding his hips against her with need.

“Oh fuck Penny~” Leech moaned and he shoved up her dress to rub her pussy.

“Gonna to have to stop this soon or Ol’ Pennywise is going to have you slammed against that wall, screaming my name for all to hear.”

“I’m half tempted to say do it anyway” Leech panted. She was soaking through her leggings from the friction Pennywise/Robert was giving her. The disguised clown chuckled darkly and nipped at the gauges in her ear while gently tearing a hole in her leggings. Leech moaned when she felt his bare fingers make contact with her slick folds. He found her sensitive nub and beginning to rub lazy circles into it. “Look at my dirty girl! Moaning for her clown right next to a warm corpse. Maybe he’ll come out to play with you later if you're good” he began playfully teasing her entrance “My little cold blooded killer.” he chuckled “Just like her mate” Robert shoved a long finger inside of her and began to pump, Leech gasped as he fucked her with his hand. “Fuck Penny that feels so good”

“Do you want more darling?”

“Yes” she panted

“Say it.”

“I want more Pennywise please!”

“That’s my girl. You're always so good for me.”

He pushed another finger into her and quickened his thrusts his animalistic growls breaking through the human disguise he wore. Leech moaned and spread her legs wider for him grinding her hips down onto his hand.  

He stopped and Robert pulled her dress back over her thighs. Leech wined at the loss of him but he put a single finger to her lips and looked to the door.

The restaurant door opened and a familiar looking man poked his head out. “Woaaah junior look at you getting frisky in the back alley after a big meal! Good for you kiddo!”

“You’re in an unusually chipper mood.” Robert growled.

“Well your Uncle Bob here just got himself a nice date with a certain mama vampire.”

“She’s not a vampire” Leech poked her head up from behind Robert’s arm

“Look tell her well be back in a minute I need to hide this body and ….clean” he turned to Leech and smirked “Looks like were going to need to post pone our plans, wanna get dessert with me later?”

“Are you even hungry? I thought you ate all night last night.”

he flashed her a fang filled grin “I can be”

Leech rolled her eyes and kissed him while Uncle Bob shut the door shaking his head.

“Its a date~” she smiled.

--------------------

Part 2 will be out tomorrow! Get ready for ice skating Robert and cute gore fluff!

[clown-bait]

29 Neibolt ST (Monster Roommate AU) CH18

OH WOW LOOK WHOS FINALLY UPDATING! Its been awhile and I need to get the main plot finished before I do anything else with the holiday plot so heres the next chapter. The gang gets take out and bonds a bit over kung pao and entrails. 

CHAPTER 18

Bad cop, Worse cop

“Well while we wait, Leech right? A word please.” the elder clown turned to the vampire. She went to stand and follow him but wobbled on her still busted leg. She would need fresh blood to heal it she had to kill again.

Leatherface helped her to the kitchen and sat her on a chair patting her head with a smile and walking out. Uncle Penny was very quiet it was actually making her quite unnerved. “Alright look this aint easy for me to say-”

“You want me out don't you. What? You worried I'm gonna ruin your little protege or something because he caught a case of the fucking feelings?” she spat claws drawn.

“Will you let me finish? Sheesh you're a little spitfire no wonder the kid likes ya.”

Leech hissed “Fine”

“Junior in there… my nephew…or whatever you want to call it. Look I like that kid a lot alright?” the elder clown began. He seemed to be struggling with this quite a bit “He’s a bit more of a drama queen but he's still a version of me. The kid likes you fangs he likes you a lot. Just be good to him alright?”

“Wait you.. care about him?” Leech instantly dropped her guard.

“Yeah kid, I guess I do.”

“I'm starting to see the relation now, you're both secret softies.” she gave him a devious smirk.

The elder clown grumbled and helped her up. “Don't tell nobody.”

————-

“Chucky does it really matter what we order were just trying to find to information” the female doll reached for her wallet that her husband was going through in search of money to pitch in for their order.

“Look we might as well get some good food outta this Tiff, and I want some of that kung pao.”

“If the doll gets chicken I want noodles” Ash spoke up slamming a $10 on the coffee table

“I'm putting in a request to keep this garlic free.” Leech shouted with a vigorous nod from Dracula.

“C-can I get orange chicken?” Jim poked his head from behind the couch.

“This aint Panda Express Jim they don't got that” Chucky grumbled getting out his own wallet.

“Get the kid sweet and sour pork” Tiff suggested.

“Ask for extra cooOOokiEs!” Penny spoke up jingling his bells as he bounced.

“Ok but do we want rice though?” Freddy called out to the rest of the gang as he repeated their orders

“Don't get it with shrimp I hate their shrimp” Uncle Penny joined in opening his own colorful wallet.

“Leatherface wants egg rolls” the giant excitedly clapped behind Leech and grunted “extra dipping sauce!” she said for him.

“What?! What do you mean you're out of the beef and broccoli what Chinese place runs out of beef and broccoli I'm calling Chin’s at least they have fucking orange chicken!” Freddy hung up the phone and dialed a different number “Hey Ken, its Fred. You got that beef and broccoli yeah?”

“Freddy were supposed to be ordering from the other place so we can find out who has the book.” the gang shouted at him.

“Oh shit. right.”

—————

“Never have I ever…been naked in public.” Chucky stated. The gang were all piled in the kitchen waiting for the unsuspecting delivery person to arrive.

“Oh fuck you.” Leech growled and took a drink along with tiff.

“Wait when did you go naked in public?” Chucky turned to his wife.

“Last girls night got a little uh….it got interesting,,,” Leech trailed off nervously as Penny spit out his drink. (which was just a cup of pure grenadine)

“You did what now?” the younger clown growled.

“Tiff may or may not have killed someone at a spa and then dumped the body at the Quarry” Leech laughed nervously.

“Which led to your brilliant drunk idea to wash the evidence off and hide the body in the lake”

“Look it was nice until that cop showed up! You even said so!”

“Wait you two went on a drunk murder spree and then skinny dipped after?” Chucky looked at both girls in awe.

“Well I had to swim out to the middle to sink the body and there was no way I was going to do that in my nice outfit.” Leech trailed off.

“Shit how come I'm never invited to girls night!?”

“Chucky you're the last person we’d invite to girls night.” Tiff rolled her eyes.

“Am I the first?” Penny turned to Leech excitedly.

“You're the second to last”

“Wait why am I last?”

A knock at the door broke the conversation. The monsters all went eerily silent horrible wicked grins grew on their faces.

“Ash and Jim should go upstairs.” Dracula suggested

“Wait you're not planning what I think you guys are planning are you?” Ash looked at the gang. He was still a good guy despite hanging with villains. Letting them kill some poor delivery kid was a bit over the line for him.

“Go upstairs Ashey” Freddy said clacking his knives on the chair he was in.

“I’m not ok with this”

“Sorry pal, gonna need you to stay out of this one. Bubba help me out here.” Freddy turned to Leatherface who causally walked over to ash and knocked him out cold. Leech snapped her fingers at Jim and pointed at the unconscious man. The poor servant struggled to haul him upstairs. A harder more impatient knock came at the door again. The monsters all vanished out of the room and silence fell upon the old house once more. The delivery girl pushed the door open with an eerie creak. “Um hello? I got a pretty big order here for a mister Kruger?”

The door slammed and locked behind her. She yelped in surprise dropping the bag of food.

“That bitch better not have spilt my chicken” Chucky whispered from the closet.

“Shhh Chucky!” Tiffany hissed.

“Babe I’ve been thinking about that chicken since the phone hung up the craving cant be stopped!”

“I cant remember did you get the white breast meat kind?” Leech whispered from behind them.

“Hell yeah thats the best kind!”

“Nice. I miss Chinese food”

“WILL BOTH OF YOU BE QUIET!” Tiff hissed rather loudly

“Who’s yelling in here? Girl doll, Leech stop chatting!” Penny's head appeared from between the coats

“I wasn't chatting it was Fangs and Chatty Cathy here. Also I have a name clown.” Tiff snarled.

“Yeah don't be mean to my wife Jingles!”

“All of you stop talking! How are you three this incompetent!” the clown hissed

“Hey! I’ve gotten better Pen!” Leech snapped at him, accidentally pulling the coat she was supporting herself with off the hanger and crashing into a broom.

“HELLO?!” the delivery girl called out frantically.

“Leech!”

“I needed something to hold onto! Are you're forgetting that my leg is fucked up!?” Leech hissed at Penny

“Ugh just come here lean on me”

“Aww thanks Pen~”

“Hey love birds shut your traps!”

“Watch your mouth doll!”

The door flung open and the girl shrieked. The monsters seemed slightly caught off guard all looking at one another to make a move.

“Oh hey there…uh you didn't see if the chicken survived did you?’

“You're still on about that?”

“i am craving that kung pao fangs.”

“WHAT THE FUCK WHAT ARE YOU AAAAHHHH” the girl screamed as her head was yanked back and a knife covered finger pressed into her throat.

“Wow you guys suck at this” Freddy laughed as the girl thrashed and shrieked.

“I am injured Freddy, also can you shut her up? I cant hear myself think.” Leech covered her sensitive ears.

“Yeah, yeah I’ll have Bubba tie her up”

“P-PLEASE STOP WHAT ARE YOU-“ the giant grabbed the girl around the waist and carried her away.

The delivery girl was blindfolded and strapped to a chair she couldn't see who was in the room with her but she could hear. Bells jingled around her and something growled.

“Mmmm I must say it is nice to get some take out from time” Pennywise laughed sniffing the girl.

The girl screamed and penny’s claws gripped her shirt sharply yanking her forward. “None of that dear, we just want to ask some questions. Then you can scream all you want hehehe.”

“YEAH LIKE WHY IS THERE SHIRMP IN MY RICE?” a raspy shout came from the living room.

“Alright bad cop my turn” Leech stood up to try to move Penny out of the way but doubled over in pain taking her chair to the floor with her. The clown snarled and released the girl going over to tend to his mate who was raking claw marks into the table.

“You're not going anywhere Leech just sit.”

“Pen I want to help.”

“You’re ruining my table with your helping. Sit.”

“But pen-“

“No buts Leech!”

The two monsters began to bicker and Dracula casually walked over to the poor delivery girl undoing her blindfold and gag. “You will have to excuse my associates my dear, they can be quite barbaric in their ways. Now, we have a few questions for you about your place of employment if you answer well things might turn out for the better for you.”

“W-what do you want to know?”

“YOU BREAK THE TABLE ON A WEEKLY BASIS PEN!”

“YEAH I BREAK THE TABLE! ITS MY TABLE TO BREAK NOT YOURS!”

“Pardon me for a moment dear” the elder vampire turned to the arguing pair. “*AHEM* WILL THE BOTH OF YOU EITHER REMOVE YOURSELVES TO A ROOM OR QUIET YOUR SHOUTING?”

The couple stopped immediately.

“……D-did you just tell us to get a room Drac?”

“Do you not think I am capable of making such remarks? I do live with Fred Kruger.”

“This is taking too long” the clown marched over to the girl grabbing her throat with his claws.

“WHERES THE BOOK?”

“I-I-I-I…”

“TELL ME!”

“Penny she cant speak because you're literally breaking her windpipe”

“Don't tell me how to intimidate my victims Leechie! Stop back seat scaring.”

“Hey I'm just calling it as I see it Pen”

The clown snarled at the nosferatu his claws making small cuts in the girls neck as he glared at his mate. “Your beloved is right clown she's no use to us dead” the elder vampire stated. Pennywise huffed and released the girl who began coughing and crying. Leech inhaled sharply and pushed herself up using her anger to mask the extreme pain in her leg and gut. She stumbled over to the girl and cupped her face. the elder vampire and clown watched on with interest.

“Girl, listen. We need to know if any of your coworkers meet the description of hair gel and revenge obsessed. Probably someone new in town, carries around a creepy looking book”

“T-theres A-Adam I g-guess… He doesn't seem revenge obsessed he seems rather nice really. Will you let me go now p-please?”

“See Pen? You just gotta get straight to the point and- Wait…wh-what was that name?” Leech’s eyes darkened and her blood ran cold

“A-Adam”

Bones cracked in the vampires shoulders and she pulled her hands away staring at her blood covered fingers and back at the girl. “Huh….that… thats interesting….”

“Apprentice, isn't that the name of-“ the elder vampire was cut off by Leech’s soft laughter that grew louder and frantic, her voice splitting into something demonic till the nosferatu doubled over and began shrieking.

“HAHAHAHA SEE YOU CANT HELP IT EITHER!” Pennywise shouted to her beaming with victory as his mate gave into a frenzied bloodlust.

“It seems she's been picking up your mannerisms clown” the elder vampire said to him.

“Birds of a feather.” Pennywise chuckled to himself as leech’s limbs stretched and dislocated. The nosferatu’s face changed to the large eared skeletal bat monster and her claws clacked against the kitchen tiles. The creature charged the delivery girl grabbing her face and tilting her head back. She frantically licked the cuts on her victims neck with greed and when the girl screamed Leech roared back at her in her face. The nosferatu bit down into the girls collar and began to shake her head side to side like a shark cutting out a large chunk of flesh. Pennywise grinned and let out an involuntary purr.

“Ah would you look at that! She's come so far. You must be proud of her.” Dracula said to him looking on like a father at his daughter’s graduation.

“Very.” Penny smiled dreamily. The elder vampire patted him on the shoulder and tipped his hat moving to join the rest of the house having dinner on the couch. Ash came downstairs rubbing his head going to the kitchen to fashion an icepack when he saw the murder scene unfolding in the kitchen

“What the hell happened here?”

Leech sniffed the air a chunk of flesh hung from her mouth. She turned to the human and lunged at him screeching, Ash quickly drew his shot gun and took aim. Before anything bad could happen something grabbed the vampire by the ear and sat her down. Whoever it was spoke to her harshly in Romanian and Leech felt weirdly compelled to obey turning back and landing in a squatting position.

“You need to show me how you did that vampire.” Penny turned to Dracula in earnest.

“What was I just doing?” Leech shook herself in a haze.

“You got triggered!” Freddy shouted with a mouth full of noodles. “Some guy named Adam has the book and you freaked out.”

“WHAT?”

————————

Gasp what a twist. Not really but I’m excited to reveal Adam the vampire to you all and the real reason Leech left him. Also Dracula shouting at night creatures to sit the fuck down in Romanian like he does with the wolf in Bram Stokers Dracula. PS: Don’t break Pennywise’s table.