#and at people looking at me i hate being looked at. i freakrd out last semester ehen i had to record myself giving a poetry analysis
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😐😐😐😐😐 SHOULDNT HAVE LOOKED AT THE SYLLABUS IT SAYS WEEKLY ZOOM MEETINGS TO CHECK PROFICIENCY
#txt#sorry sorry sorry. i hate talking i hate talking i hate talking.#like ik ik im taking online courses so i shouldve expected but i hate zoom i hate zoom i hate zoom!!!!!!!!!!#my other professors that wanted to do zoom always wanted to see my face too and i have really really bad anxiety abt being watched#and at people looking at me i hate being looked at. i freakrd out last semester ehen i had to record myself giving a poetry analysis#idk idk idk. anne needs to go to sleep challenge.#but also ive only ever been good at writing in french im so fucking bad at talking im self conscious esp bc of my accent bc its hard to#make a lot of the sounds in french bc i cant make those sounds ehen i talk bc of my accent. i cant say Rs barely at all. my vowels are#fucked up. idk im so self conscious abt my language skills but its important and i want to push myself. but i am full of self doubt.#and constantly comparing myself to my wife bc shes multilingual and grew up being multilingual (english russian n hebrew). she can speak#like 8 different languages ik 4 at a native level n i know i can never do that. but i beat myself up abt it bc idk#goodnigjt
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