#and herding w Navi here and there

[maisietheyellowlab]

After almost 2 years of focusing really hard on finishing my Master's in Psychology (and especially after I stopped working as a dog trainer), I'm getting reminded by Crufts how much I miss being a full-on dog person. I really have to do smth about it!!!

[curlyhairednerd]

The slaver ship was forced to stop in its tracks by the herd of sea kings surrounding them.

“Are they migrating?” One asked nervously.

Another one gasped as he looked out through his spyglass. “Sir, there’s a man standing on top of one! He’s coming right for us!”

“What?!” The captain ran to the front of the ship. “Impossible!!”

But it was true. Standing on the head of the largest sea king was a man with long white hair, a red coat, and a yellow shell necklace around his throat. Killian “Sea Witch” Delacroux.

“Hide the cargo!” The slaver hissed to one of his men. Then he turned and raised his voice to the pirate. “What do you want?! I have the authority to call the navy for help!” He shouted.

The sea king growled as it came to a stop. Killian glowered down at the ship, tapping his trident against the monster’s head. “You don’t know me, but I definitely know you. Twenty years ago, you stole a woman from Fishman Island! An octopus mermaid, whose family worked for the royal family for generations.” He growled. “You ripped her away from home and family, and you sold her to a celestial dragon!”

“So!?” The slaver could remember that sale. It had been his best one ever, and had made him rich beyond his years. “What’s this about?!”

“That beautiful, wonderful woman died in captivity after eight years.” Killian continued, tears of rage in his eyes. “Protecting her son from abuse. If it had only been a year later, then Fisher Tiger would’ve freed her like he freed me.”

“You’re her son?!” The slaver screamed in fear, knowing what this was about. “What do you want for me.”

“Get in the water.”

“W-what?”

“Get in the water!” Killian gestured to the stormy sea full of sea kings. “Or I’ll raise the tides so full of sea kings, you and all your lot will be killed in the grand line! Get in the water!”

“You’re bluffing!” The slaver declared, only to find the trident impaled at his feet in the deck.

“Don’t mistake my threats for bluffs!” Killian snarled, the sea king barring its teeth. “You have lived more than enough! GET IN THE WATER!”

As the sea kings had their feast on an entire crew, Killian swept through the ship. In the lowest deck, hidden under a cloth was a cage. He could hear the sniffling.

“Hey, it’s alright.” He consoled, pulling the sheet off. “I’m getting you out of here.” He told the little girl he found. “What’s your name kiddo?”

“I’m Crossette.”

[dragondevinity]

Nezuko in Avatar: TWOW ❤️

Part 3 & 4

Chapter three

The next morning came quickly, Kiri woke up first and decided something, she decided to teach Nezuko how to be a Navi, “Nezuko wake up please” Kiri said while shaking Nezuko, “w-what?” Nezuko said sleepily, “I’m going to teach you how to hunt!” Kiri said cheerfully, “okay… wait what?” She says now awake, “well come on!” Kiri says now carrying Nezuko, luckily no one got woken up by the two of them somehow…

After tracking down a Hexapede herd and picking one to kill, and after giving Nezuko a rundown on how to do it.

“Now!” Kiri says quietly to Nezuko, Nezuko let’s go of the arrow and it hits quickly making the target immobilised, allowing Nezuko to run up and kill it fully, “thank you brother may your soul go run with the great mother, while your body stays to become part of the people” Nezuko says after getting a clean kill, she gives Kiri her knife back, Kiri goes to grab the Hexapede, when Nezuko suddenly picks up part of it with ease, this confuses Kiri since not even Spider can do that so easily, “let’s get this back to the tribe!” Nezuko says excited, “yes!” Kiri says just as excited to show her parents of how good Nezuko is.

After they get back, “Stay here with the Hexapede Nezuko, I’ll go get my parents to see your kill” Kiri says even more excited, she then goes to grab her parents leaving Nezuko with the Hexapede, Navi stood looking at Nezuko after Kiri had said that seemingly starting to process what Kiri said, then Kiri was back with a confused Jake and Neytiri, “damn! She really did it huh?” Jake said getting slapped on the back of his head by Neytiri, “good job Nezuko, you made really good progress… there’s a few things left until you fully become one of the people, and I can say this truthfully, you are progressing faster then this Shxwang ever did” Neytiri said with a smile while pointing at Jake, everyone of the adult Navi chuckled at what she said, “thank you for the compliment Neytiri” Nezuko replied.

Jake got someone to take the Hexapede to get prepared for dinner and sent Kiri somewhere, leaving Nezuko with him and Neytiri, “come with us Nezuko we will talk in private the three of us” Neytiri says, “okay!” Nezuko replied happily, Nezuko then followed them into their Marui, they all took a seat and suddenly there was a serious tint to the air, “I need to ask you something and you have to be truthful, alright Nezuko?” Jake says getting a nod from Nezuko, “how are you so strong? I know you were sent here by Eywa but but even a Navi teen would have trouble with carrying half of a hexapeed like Kiri said you were, and she said you took on more of the weight making it nearly weightless on her side and yet you kept up with her…” Jake said looking at Nezuko intently waiting for the answer, Nezuko sighed, she hadn’t remembered that humans in general wouldn’t be able to carry most small things on Pandora, much less a Hexapede, “Jake, Neytiri It has to do with what happened… this may take a while to explain is that okay?” Nezuko said looking at them both, “yes” both of them said, “it all started with my big brother going to go sell charcoal in the village down the mountain, the night he left we stayed up waiting for him, there was a knock at the door which my mother answered, as soon as she did she was impaled instantly killing her… I grabbed one of my siblings and attempted to flee… all of my siblings besides my older brother died that night and my mother also died… that man who killed them gave me his blood to kill me… it didn’t work instead I turned into a demon…” Nezuko took in some breath after that part of the explanation, then saw the look on both Jake and Neytiri’s faces, they had looks of sorrow on them, “wait what do you mean he gave you his blood and now you’re a demon?” Neytiri asked, “the man who killed most of my family was the demon king, a being capable of turning humans into demons…” Nezuko replied, getting a nod from Neytiri, “the next morning my brother got back and found our family dead, he checked everyone’s pulse while crying, I was the only one who had one… after I fully turned into a demon and I nearly got killed, he got told to go get taught by a retired demon slayer, so he could become one himself, after he trained which I was asleep for the two years it took, he came back from final selection making him a low rank demon slayer, after he got his sword we set off with me in a box on his back since the sun can kill demons, and ever since then I was always there to help him on his missions if I was needed… in our last battle I launched him towards one of the top seven most dangerous demons that was running away due to the sun rising, and I burned to what I thought was death… but Eywa brought me here making me immune to the sun, and well now I’m here” Nezuko said now finished telling them about what happened to cause everything… “I’m so sorry you had to go through that Nezuko…” Neytiri said enveloping Nezuko in a hug, “Im also sorry you had to go through” Jake said petting Nezukos head causing her to hum as her tears were wiped from her face.

Unbeknownst to them they had eavesdropers outside the entrance listening in… Kiri, Tuk, Lo’ak, Neteyam and spider to be exact…

Anyways I hope you enjoyed the chapter and have a lovely day bye!

/——————/

Chapter four

“Kids, and spider I know you’re there come here…” Neytiri said still hugging Nezuko, they all entered staring at Nezuko who just stopped crying, they all had questions about her, and they were all sad that she went through all of that. “You said you were turned into a demon… can you explain what that entails?” Kiri said stating what everyone else was thinking, “I can explain what a normal demon is like…” she said, everyone nodded, “humans can become demons due to the demon king’s blood, he must inject a person with it, after that depending on how much blood he gave you and how you’re transformation affects the person will conclude on how strong they are, after becoming a demon you are immortal, sort of, you can be decapitated by a special type of sword or burned if in sunlight, unlike other demons im considered to be special, I’m a good demon and fought other demons that would attempt devouring humans, I have never eaten a human and I never planned to…” she said nearly rambling, she let that sink in, “so… instead of eating humans I’ve adapted to gain energy from sleeping… and Eywa allowed me to eat normal food…” she finished waiting for any sort of reaction, “that explains why you’re so strong, and I am able to tell you’re telling the truth.” Neytiri said hugging Nezuko again while also petting her head, everyone else nodded as to agree with Neytiri, “oh I should probably show you guys something!” Nezuko suddenly said, Neytiri gently let Nezuko go while smiling confused, Nezuko suddenly grew into her full form surprising the Sullys and spider, “wait what!” Lo’ak says as she’s now just over 6ft tall, with a horn on her head and visible vine patterns on her skin, Kiri is now staring even more than everyone else, “you look so cool!” Kiri says, this makes Nezuko slightly flustered which got coo’s from Neytiri as Neteyam, Lo’ak and spider stare at her in jealousy since she got Nezuko to be flustered.

After all of that the day went great, Nezuko turned back to her normal age and helped around the clan, everyone that she helped was grateful and also coo’ing over her adorableness, also poor Kiri who was internally panicking whenever Nezuko was around due to now crushing on her.

I hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m sort of having writers block, it’s due to multiple things but anyways I’m glad I could write this chapter for anyone who enjoys the story!! Have a lovely day bye!

[mediocre--writing]

The Only Aussie I’d Fuck

Luke Hemmings x Reader

Word Count: 3K

Summary: Luke’s girlfriend, Y/n, is a famous actress she’s been begging him to watch her show and he’s finally caving, watching with his band mates, but how will Luke feel at her and her co-star’s on-screen relationship?

Warnings: Despite the title, this isn’t smut, a few mentions of making out but no smut. 

All the boys sat crowded around the television as the screen was being switched from Cable to a streaming service.

It was unlikely that the boys would just sit around a TV when they weren’t touring, since they usually wanted to do things they weren’t allowed to on tour, like spend time with loved ones or, the least likely thing they would actually get to do on tour, have a good night's sleep. But this was a special occasion, Luke’s girlfriend, Y/n, had been practically begging him to watch her show for the past few months, and he wasn't ignoring his girlfriend, he just never really had the time to. 

She had wanted to watch it with him, something that she had expressed multiple times to him on the phone, but she was busy filming the next season of the show somewhere in the mid-western US, Nebraska, he thinks. It was some sort of horror/comedy/teen coming of age thing that she never really explained other than she was in it and alluded to him a time or two. 

Luke was immensely proud of her and all that she had accomplished, when they met in 2014, he never thought that they’d both become who they were today and they never imagined the relationship that grew between them, especially a healthy relationship, given their current occupations that set certain restrictions on their capabilities on getting together in person. 

They fit together well, where he was introverted to an extent, she would push him out of his comfort zone, and vice-versa depending on the situation. They both understood each other on different levels, they both had a really creative and artistic side, yet they also enjoyed the quiet peace of being home just laying in the quiet; sans Petunia’s toenails tapping on the hardwood floors as she roamed about the house aimlessly. 

All the boys settled in to watch, given they were all close to Y/n as well, for she had gone on the american leg of the Sounds Live, Feels Live and Meet You There tours with them and bonded with the boys, gaining three more friends, real friends, not some snobby stuck up bitches that she worked with regularly. These were normal, down to earth boys who understood more than money and fame and could take a joke. 

Luke snapped a picture of the screen and the boys and their load of snacks and sent it to Y/n, proof that he was actually, finally, watching it, something she’d been begging him to do for far too long. 

As the show loaded and began to play, Michael nudged Luke’s shoulder a few times as Y/n’s face came into view, showing her sitting in a classroom gnawing on the eraser part of her pencil. 

“Look at our girl” Ashton said as they all watched the screen with more attention than they ever gave at a business meeting.

The show was set in a private-school like setting, all the kids wearing white and navy blue uniforms. The whole scene had a white noise, disturbed only by the slamming of a book, which made Y/n’s head shoot up to look at the teacher. She had a kind of glare to her eyes as she stared at the older man, who looked very displeased at her attention focused on her daydreams rather than school. 

“Ms. Carter, what was I talking about a moment ago?” 

“Dinosaurs!” She said with confidence. 

“This is a calculus class, Ms. Carter, detention,” 

“Aye, Aye captain,” She saluted him, causing him to shoot her another glare as she smirked and high fived a few people around her. 

The scene changed as she was now walking through the hallways, towards a crowd around the bathrooms, “What’s up, Maggie, we watching people piss or something?” 

A girl, who Luke distantly remembers Y/n complaining about at some point, begins to speak, “There’s a new hot guy in the bathroom and some girl said that he’s from a different country.” 

“We live in fucking Nebraska, who the hell would move here? People move away from here, not to here.” 

“Just wait, I swear he had a weird voice!” Another girl said from the group. 

“Was it anything like yours? Because if so we may need to fumigate the place” Y/n snapped at her. “What’s his name? Or do you know nothing other than his ‘weird voice?’” 

After her statement, the boy came out to see the small group of seven-ish girls standing near the boys bathroom. 

“Hey you! What’s your deal?” Maggie yelled at the boy.

He turned, showing his TV-perfect face scrunched in confusion, “What'd ya mean?” 

“Where you from, why are you here, what's your deal?” Maggie spat at the poor boy who was blushing redder than a firetruck. 

“I’m Oliver Hunnington and I’m from Sydney, my dad got a job somewhere here and so I’m here too.” He shrugged, looking far too uncomfortable with the situation

“Sydney like as in Australia?” Maggie asked with a raised eyebrow, to which he nodded and ducked his head in embarrassment at the herd of girls staring at him like raw meat. 

Y/n’s character stepped up with a hand held out to him, “I’m Savannah Carter, and you look like you’re about to shit your pants so do you need help finding your classes or are you just generally terrified of women?” 

The boys chuckled at the statement, thinking of how Y/n had said something similar to Luke the first time they met, the boy was blushing so bad he looked ready to pass out.

“Little bit of both, not gonna lie,” He chuckled, to which she grabbed his hand, looked him in the eyes with a smirk, and led him down the hallway, the girls hooting after them, Y/n turning to playfully glare at them.

The first episode just established the basic plot, it ending with a threatening scene of some gloved hands cleaning a bloody hammer as screaming is heard in the background, the end credits rolling as the next episode begins to load. 

The show was good, it wasn’t like the cringy ones that have creepy staring contests that were meant to be intimate, and the comedy wasn’t forced, it was just generally sarcastic, and it was actually enticing to watch, not just another boring Riverdale-type knockoff. 

Y/n’s character had made a few flirty remarks at Oliver, mostly jokes about eating him alive if he’d let her and asking him if he’d ever done...things with girls, which were awkward scenes but funny nonetheless.

She had teasingly trailed her fingers down his neck and shoulders a few times. There have been a few make-out scenes between her and a few other characters, most of them being guys though there was a point when she kissed Maggie, but those scenes only caused mild discomfort for the boys, three of which had been eyewitnesses to her and Luke’s make-out sessions every once and awhile. 

Her character was so different from the Y/n they knew, Y/n was kind and soft and would bake them cookies when she felt like it and she would never force anyone to do anything. Her character, Savannah, however, was sexual and not at all the socially anxious Y/n they all knew too well, Savannah had an air about her that couldn’t be ignored and practically begged for attention. 

They were on the seventh episode, they were gonna end on the fifth but they got intrigued by the plot and decided “just one more” which was really just an excuse, though they knew none of them wanted to actually stop the next episode from playing. 

The show is all about a person who is going around and hurting people, but never killing them, just slow torture, but you don’t know who they are and nobody can figure it out, and one of the characters involved with the main characters in the first episode was attacked by the masked person, so they all get involved; Savannah, Maggie, Oliver, and the other, more minor, characters in the show. 

Another character, Jess, an innocent girl who was a class below them and looked up to Savannah to guide her, so she became like a little sister and helped them all figure things out because she was really smart. 

Oliver and Savannah got really close too. She would always make sexual jokes at him and make him uncomfortable just so she could see him blush and have his hair fall over his face as he looked down in embarrassment. 

The scene the boys were at now consisted of them being at a party, Y/n’s character and Jess being in a bedroom looking for anything suspicious, while they talked idly. 

“Do you ever worry what this all could mean for your future?” Jess asked.

“What do you mean?” Savannah asked, stopping her searching and leaning on the bed.

“Like what if something happens and things go wrong and… i don't know what if someone thinks we are the ones doing… all this?” 

“Listen honey, I hate to tell you this, but my only goal in life is to get that cute little Aussie downstairs to pin me down by my neck and fuck me so hard that I can taste it, so if you’re asking me for advice about the future and shit, I’m really no help at all, kid,” Y/n’s character said with a smirk as she returned to looking for whatever she was looking for before. 

Calum, who had just been taking a sip of water, choked on it as all the boys looked up to Luke, who was staring wide eyed at the TV with a prominent blush across his cheeks. 

Michael and Ashton, who had moved to the floor in front of Luke and Cal on the couch somewhere between the third and fourth episode, were wiggling their eyebrows while Calum turned around and rubbed his hands over his back as if he were making out with someone, making Luke flush even more than before. 

A weak “Stop,” could be heard but the boys just laughed at Luke as they returned to the show. 

They ended up finishing the series that night, since there were only 11 episodes and they had to finish it then or else they would never be able to find the time to sit and actually finish it. 

It ended with Y/n’s character being attacked by the masked killer guy, but surviving and finding out that it was Jess’ dad who was behind the attacks, and he was manipulating Jess to get information on people going against him.

Savannah and Oliver ended up having their little moment, which gave the boys another reason to make jokes at Luke. 

The scene consisted of her grabbing his silky looking shirt and pulling his face to hers, whispering, “Is that a telephone pole in your pants or are you just happy to see me?” 

“Well maybe I was promised a chance at something and now I finally have the perfect moment to get it.” 

“Then come get it, we don’t have all day,”

He shoved her into the wall by her hips and reached a hand up to her neck, “We have as long as we want,” 

She smirked and the scene was moved to an overview of the city, turning into a map, then a big, red X was placed over the house that it had zoomed away from, then the credits rolled. 

The boys decided that, since it was roughly 4 am anyways, that they’d all just stay the night, especially since they were gonna meet at Luke’s and have brunch together the next day anyway. 

Ashton and Michael ended up knocking out on the floor, Calum curled up in a chair and Luke took the couch. 

--

The sun rose only a few hours after they had fallen asleep, which didn’t disturb their sleep in the slightest, but the knocking on the door sure did. 

KayKay and Crystal had been knocking on the door for at least ten minutes before Crystal tried to call Michael, who didn’t answer, so she called Luke, then Ashton, but neither of them answered either. 

Calum was woken up by the buzzing of their phones, so when his phone rang, he answered with a groggy voice, and had to pull the phone away from his ear at the sound of excited squeals, “Thank God!” Crystal said, “Let us in, we've been here for half an hour and it's COLD!” 

Calum chuckled as he walked to answer the door, kicking Michael and Ashton’s backs as he walked by, causing them to stir in their sleep. 

Cal let the girls in and the other boys woke up soon after, getting semi-ready for their brunch, which was looking to be more of a lunch as they took forever to wake up and get ready-- the boys claimed it was payback because the girls always took far to long to get ready.

The boys told KayKay and Crystal about how they finally watched Y/n’s show, to which they made a few remarks of “What took you so long?” and “Isn’t it great?!” and “Damn, I wanted to watch Luke’s face when she made the Aussie jokes at Oliver!” 

When they finally were about ready to leave, there was a knocking on the door, each of them looking around in question since their whole group was already here. 

Given it was Luke’s place, and he was still getting ready, they had a silent debate on who would get the door before Crystal’s eyes widened almost comically and she shot up to go to the door. 

Michael made a face at her as if asking “What the fuck?” but made no verbal response to her actions until there was loud squealing heard from the door. 

Luke came down the stairs as the guys rounded the corner to see the door when they saw Crystal jumping and hugging someone--Y/n.

Luke came the rest of the way down the stairs and shoved through his friends, towards his girlfriend, and picked her up just moments after she had escaped Crystal’s death grip. 

“Hi Bubs,” She whispered into his curly hair, which made him hold her even tighter than he was before, Crystal had taken a secret picture of the couple hugging (which would soon become Luke’s phone wallpaper). 

The hug lasted a bit longer than it should have, but they hadn’t seen each other in person for over four months, so the rest of the group ignored it for now, especially since they were just hugging and not having a fun little make out-sesh in front of them like they had a tendency to do every now and then. 

Luke set her down and looked into her eyes, which were filled with happy tears that had yet to fall, “When did you get back?” 

“I took the weekend off to come see you because I don’t have to work until Tuesday next week and I really wanted to see you and then you sent me the text last night and I wanted to watch the show with you even if it was cringy for me. Then I realized that I really, really needed to see you and so I booked a plane ticket and it left at like four this morning and I’m really tired but I'm here and I’m with you.”  Y/n barely breathed as she explained herself, but Luke just fell more and more in love with her, if that was possible.

Luke put his hands against her jaw as if he was going to kiss her but he just looked into her eyes and smiled, a big toothy grin that took up his whole face and made her smile too, tears dripping down her cheeks freely now as they hugged again. 

After their hug, he invited her to come to brunch with them unless she was too tired, in which he would stay at home with her, but she agreed to go to brunch because she hasn’t eaten in almost 12 hours and “might drop dead of hunger soon” if she didn’t eat soon. 

They went to a smaller cafe for a lunch/brunch thing where half of them got waffles and the others got hamburgers or pasta. 

They joked and laughed for a few hours, basking in being together as a group for the first time in forever. The boys recounted tales of touring that the girls may have missed and also complimented Y/n on the show they finally watched, to which she shoved her head into Luke’s shoulder in embarrassment, but thanked them nonetheless. 

They all hugged Y/n, as it would likely be the last time they’d see her that weekend, then they all drove to their respective homes. 

--

When Luke and Y/n got inside, Luke grabbed her waist from behind as she squealed, “Put me down, Bubs!” 

He ignored her and just walked up the stairs to his room and threw her onto the bed, causing her to squeal again. 

“So are you saying that you don’t want me, a hot Aussie, to pin you down by the throat and fuck you?” She groaned, not an erotic groan but one of annoyance as she looked up at Luke who was also giggling at her reaction. 

“I hate you! I really do! I really, really hate you! I swear to god, Hemmings, I can not stand you!” Her cheeks became hot as she shoved her head into the pillows.

Luke just giggled as he laid down next to her and pulled her in by the waist and cuddled into her like a koala, “I love you, you know that?” 

“Matter of fact I do know that, and I love you too,” She said, “but I don’t love you when you use my character’s dialogue against me, hurts my heart a little bit, not gonna lie,”

He pushed his bottom lip out in a pout, “Well I’m sorry, how bout we cuddle then we can just watch something on TV or nap, because I’m not gonna lie, I didn’t fall asleep til after 5 and you had an early flight, so I feel like i’m gonna crash soon.” 

“Fine by me, bubs,” She took a deep breath, inhaling the way he smelled as if it were the last time she would be with him and she snuggled her face into his chest a bit more, electing a giggle from him, “Fine by me.”

“I’m still the only hot Aussie you want to fuck though, right?” Luke asked quietly, looking down at her.

“Of course you are, you’re the only Aussie I’d want to fuck, you big baby,” 

They both giggled for another moment and Y/n drifted to sleep, soft snores coming from her parted lips as Luke could almost see the small velvet box sitting in his underwear drawer that he couldn’t wait to give her soon, really soon.

[thecollegefootballguy]

2020 Top Games of the Week: Championship Week

Folks we did it! I can’t believe it but we made it to the end of the season. It all comes down to championship week, where everything gets decided. The Playoff participants, the NY6 bowls, everything. I’m hyped and I hope you are as well. Time to preview the top games!

RIP to the Sun Belt Championship Game which was cancelled due to COVID. Coastal Carolina already beat Louisiana in the regular season so I’m ok calling the Chanticleers the champions of the conference.

The Top Ten Games of the Week

10. Air Force 3-2 (2-2) at Army 8-2

This intra-service rivalry game was cancelled earlier in the year, but that isn’t stopping Army and Air Force from playing at the end of the year. With both teams having defeated Navy, the winner here will hoist the Commander-in-Chief’s Trophy as the top academy in the nation.

9. UAB 5-3 (3-1) at Marshall 7-1 (4-1)

UAB is playing in their third straight Conference USA Championship Game. The Blazers have had the West division on lock ever since returning from the dead. Marshall is playing for the championship for the third time in program history, their first since 2014. The Thundering Herd were undefeated, flying under the radar behind Cincinnati and Coastal Carolina for most of the year before being upset by Rice two weeks ago, knocking them out of the NY6 race.

8. Ball State 5-1 (5-1) vs Buffalo 5-0 (5-0)

The MAC started late but the league really put on a pretty good show at the top. Undefeated Buffalo is playing in their second MAC Championship in three years but attempting to win their first conference title since 2008. Ball State is in the MAC CG for only the second time in program history. The Cardinals only other appearance was that 2008 game against the Bulls. #12 Ball State was infamously upset by Buffalo that year, ruining their undefeated season and a real shot at a BCS bowl. The Bulls aren’t in line for a NY6 bowl, but the Cardinals can at least pay them back partway by spoiling an undefeated record and claiming their first MAC title since 1996.

7. Boise State 5-1 (5-0) vs #24 San Jose State 6-0 (6-0) (Las Vegas, NV)

San Jose State finally meets Boise after their regular season matchup was cancelled. The Spartans have had a charmed year, their first undefeated regular season since 1939. The Broncos may have a loss, but many people think that BSU will prove the spoiler. Boise State has never lost to SJSU in 19 tries dating back to the WAC. The winner likely won’t make the NY6, but this means a lot to both teams, especially San Jose State.

6. Oregon 3-2 (3-2) at #13 USC 5-0 (5-0)

The (sort-of) PAC-12 Championship Game features the South Champ against the North runner-up (sort-of). Oregon never actually played first place Washington so it’s hard to actually say if the Ducks are better or worse than the Huskies. This weird PAC-12 season hasn’t exactly proven that the conference is back to the top of the P5, and even if USC beats UO for their unbeaten record they don’t deserve a spot in the Playoffs even if the Committee will likely gift them a spot in a NY6 bowl. If Oregon wins I find it likely that the PAC-12 will become the first ever P5 conference to be shut out of the NY6. The Ducks are playing in their record 4th Championship Game (3-0 record so far), while SC is playing in their third (1-1).

5. #23 Tulsa 6-1 (6-0) at #9 Cincinnati 8-0 (6-0)

The Playoff Committee has made it explicitly clear that Cincinnati won’t get into the Playoff even if they run the table. It’s a shame, the Bearcats are definitely worthy if, say, Clemson loses to Notre Dame again. Oh well. Congrats to the victor, whoever it is. Tulsa has also had a very strong season and came inches short of their own undefeated season after several years of underperforming. Cincinnati made their first AAC CG last year in a losing effort to Memphis. The Golden Hurricane are in their first ever AAC championship.

4. #10 Oklahoma 7-2 (6-2) vs #6 Iowa State 8-2 (8-1)

I have to admit that the Big 12 Championship Game is very interesting to me even if I categorically think that the winner should not make the Playoff over Cincinnati. The Sooners are playing for their sixth consecutive Big 12 Championship and their 12th total appearance in the championship game. On the other end of the spectrum is Iowa State, who are playing in their first ever championship game and eligible for their first conference title since winning the MVIAA in 1912. The Cyclones are the #1 seed and already have bested OU in the regular season, but Oklahoma has been playing much better in the past few months since that meeting.

3. #14 Northwestern 6-1 (6-1) vs #4 Ohio State 5-0 (5-0) (Indianapolis, IN)

The first of the three P5 Playoffs with a clear “play-in” factor for the Playoff. If Ohio State beats Northwestern they’re in. Northwestern likely can’t say the same but a 1-loss Wildcat team with a win over the Buckeyes might have a claim to make if things get weird in the other Championship Games. OSU has dominated the Big Ten CG in the last few years, having won the past 3 conference championships. NU has played in it once in 2018 where they put up a brave but impotent fight against OSU. I think most people are expecting a repeat of that game.

2. #1 Alabama 10-0 (10-0) vs #7 Florida 8-2 (8-2) (Atlanta, GA)

It always feels weird whenever the SEC Championship Game isn’t the #1 game of championship week. Alabama is the favorite as usual and should take home the W here and ride into the Playoff. Still, with Florida only ranked 7th there is a scenario in which some real weird things happen if the Gators win. Both the Crimson Tide and Gators are playing in their record breaking 14th SEC Championships. The pair have are going to face-off for the title for the 10th time in history. Bama holds a 5-4 record against UF in these meetings.

1. #3 Clemson 9-1 (8-1) vs #2 Notre Dame 10-0 (9-0) (Charlotte, NC)

If I’m Notre Dame I might think a bit harder about joining the ACC in football permanently. I mean, if it’s gonna be this easy why not go for a conference title every year? In all seriousness this is the linchpin of the P5 Conference Championship Games, plenty of dominoes will fall differently depending on this outcome. Trevor Lawrence is back to lead Clemson, and many people assume the Tigers are gonna pull off the win because of it. It may not be that simple, after all, the Clemson D lost their previous matchup as much as anything.

If Notre Dame wins they’ll be an easy #1 or #2 seed and in the Playoff (depending on the SEC outcome) and Clemson will likely fall out of the top 4, opening up a spot for perhaps the Big 12 Champion or some SEC shenanigans. Even though we all know Cincinnati should get the spot if a spot opens. If Clemson wins then it’s likely the top 4 will calcify with the two ACC teams occupying half of the available slots. It’ll be interesting to see how it shakes out.

Clemson is playing for their fifth consecutive ACC Championship. Notre Dame is obviously playing in the first ever conference title game.

[jenni42085]

Made in the AM <Two>

Ch. Two

Alex's POV

The rest of my day consisted of packing, making sure all my bills were paid up to date, and getting more coverage for my cellphone. I didn't have any idea of how long I'd be gone for but I packed enough clothing for atleast three weeks, hopefully that will be enough. Plus having two big suitcase with plenty of room for if I have any souvenirs.

"So where are you going first?" Tori asks while helping me straighten up my room. Figured since I might be gone a few weeks no need to come home to a dirty place.

"The itinerary says I'll start off in Singapore for a few days, and from there no idea really, I guess they figure if I finish quickly enough no need to fill me in. I hope to get a bunch of great pictures and souvenirs though in my down time. Are you sure you can't beg them to come with? I don't want to do this alone." I ask sitting down next to her resting my head on her shoulder.

"Lex, you are going to be fine. I'm sure they will absolutely adore you. Let's have our last lunch before you leave."

"T, what am I going to do without you there?" I ask getting my shoes on and lingering at the floor.

"You are going to shine bright like I know you can."

MANY HOURS LATER

"Alexandria, we're in Singapore." Paul nudges me awake.

I wipe the sleep from my eyes and look out the window. "What time it is? "

"Umm almost 8 am." Paul says as he hands my laptop bag from the overhead compartment. "We are heading to the hotel then possibly out to eat. The guys will probably be asleep until noon if not later."

"Ok, that's great because I'd like to sleep in an actual bed instead of on the plane. When will I meet them?" I ask because I'm not mentally ready yet. Most of the 15 hour flight was spent listening to their albums trying to figure out what kind of style they lean to. Mainly it is a lot of pop but some songs show a different kind of range in music, maybe I can use it towards my advantage. I didn't actually close my eyes until the last two hours of the flight.

"If you are up for it, you can meet them tonight before their show. If not tomorrow, I know jet lag is a pain."

"Understatement, I'll try to be up and ready to meet the guys tonight. I'm just exhausted."

"I understand, if you can't meet them today it is ok.  No stress.  " Paul replied leading to the black SUV.

We rode silently to the hotel, I was taking in the sounds, smells, and scenery of Singapore. This city is so large, I can't wait to explore but right now I can't wait to get to my room. Paul informed me that they had blocked off the entire penthouse so I wouldn't have to worry about anyone really bothering me.

I open the door to a large suite; most of the room was a crisp white color which was refreshing. There was a king size bed that has big plush white comforter on it. After my bags were in my room I stripped out of my clothes and step into the oversized bathroom. Seeing as I was too tired to soak in the tub, I opt for a shower because I don't think I could stay awake much longer. I dry off then apply some Love Spell body butter then put on a cami and some boy shorts then crawl into bed. Slowly, I close my eyes and drift off into dreamland.

BAM BAM BAM. What was that? I shoot up in bed with my heart racing. Seriously? I thought this was going to be a peaceful time of just exploring more emotions and writing but apparently not. These boys are already way to loud.  I grabbed my headphones and turn up some peaceful ocean waves then try to drift back to sleep.

I wake up to my once bright room to be dark but illuminated by the lights of outside. The city looks kind of like a Christmas wonderland with all the lights going on. I take out my camera and take a few shots of the beauty because it is absolutely breathtaking. I stretch once again and look at the clock. Paul had said that they try to leave for the arena by 8, that means I have less than forty-five minutes to get dressed.

Thankfully I'm not high maintenance it only takes fifteen minutes to get ready. I throw on my Old Navy skinny jeans with a plain white tee and my light weight gray hoodie. Part of me was afraid to wear flip flops in a high traffic place where someone might crush my toes so I fall back to my usual cotton candy colored Converse. Pretty sure that isn't the name of the color but I call them that since they are pastel purple, pink, and teal with a clear coat of glitter to make them sparkle.

Checking myself in the mirror I look more of a stage crew member then a song writer but meh. I'm comfortable and it looks semi cute. I throw my braids into a messy bun. So happy that my nap made me alert enough to not need any makeup, just some watermelon flavored Chapstick. I grab my mini Fossil cross body then pack the usual necessary items Chapstick, mirror, wallet, notepad, pen, room key, and cell phone then head out.

As I walk into the hallway I'm greeted by one of the security guards who looks rather intimidating. I give a small wave but he doesn't return it. "Miss Morris, this way to the van." I follow him down the hallway then midway I hear a door opening out comes Paul looking slightly stressed but upbeat.

"Glad to see you made it to our first concert after the break. They will be the best and most energetic. You can ride with us over there." I nod my head at him. " They should all be meeting us here in a moment and I'll introduce you."

I flash him a smile and reply "Great, can't wait." But mentally I can wait, this is seriously making my blood pressure jump a few points. This isn't what I need but yet here I am feeling hot and a little dizzy.

A loud noise approaching me knocks me out of my thoughts. What the fresh hell is going on? I turn around to be greeted with a herd of bodies. "Guys!! Seriously we don't need to get kicked out for all the noise." I stare back at the group of guys with wide eyes.

"Who's this? Your new assistant?" The blonde asks.

"No Niall, this is your songwriter. Her name is Alexandria. She is here to help you guys along. She is going to watch you guys tonight and probably travel with us for a few weeks. Be nice."

I have four sets of eyes shift in my direction suddenly I feel even more self conscious and kind of naked, I let a small " Hello" out with a wave.

"Hello Alexandria. I'm Niall." He offers his hand to me and I graciously shake it. He releases my hand then points out the rest of the guys, "That is Louis, Liam, and Harry."

Louis and Liam both give me a firm handshake while Harry barely acknowledges my presence. What crawled up his ass? Maybe he is still tired from traveling all day. Who knows, but it was kind of rude.  I guess my facial expression showed some disgust with his hand shake because Liam shot him a look. "Don't pay grumpy much mind, he didn't sleep to well on the drive here."

With that response I force my face into a half smile and nod. "No worries. And you can call me Alex."

"Well Alex, are you ready to see how we rock it out?" Niall asks excitedly. Again I nod feeling very shy and unsure of what I have signed up for. We pile into the van and head towards the arena. I wish I had brought that water I had just opened with me because my blood pressure is trying to get the best of me.

*****************************************************************************************************

Harry's POV

So this is our songwriter? She doesn't look like anything special. I was honestly hoping for someone a little fitter than that but I guess if you only write and never perform what would you expect.  Right?  This was not what I was expecting when Paul said Simon had sent us something that we needed. She seems nice enough just really quiet and very shy. It does beg the question as to how she was able to write music about love, life, and everything in between it doesn't seem like she even leaves the house often.

Niall and Liam are always the first to make friends with people. They have her seated in between them chatting it up like old friends."So what album were you working on last?" Louis asks as I shoot him a dirt look that he ignores.

"Umm, I... I have been working with Tori Kelly mainly." She finally managed to get out.

"Really!!?" Niall exclaims excitedly. "Her voice is powerful! Nobody Love is an epic song I bet the rest of her album will be amazing. How did you meet her?"

"High school."

"High school" the three of them repeat her as in a slight shock.

"Yeah, we have been best friends since freshman year."

Without even thinking I state, "So you are like riding off of her talent, yeah?" After the words left my mouth I knew I went to far. "Umm I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that"

But it was too late the damage was done. The van fell silent. I turned around to get a look at her, her face was illuminated by her cell phone and her face was solemn with tears in her eyes. "No, I got here on my own merit. I work hard I just don't sing. Simon picked me for my skills." She calmly states in a flat tone.

I hear Liam whisper something to her. My intention wasn't to make her tear up like that. Louis smacks me in the back of the head. "Smooth move mate! You are going to have her crying and not for the right reasons."

"Fuck! I wasn't trying to be mean. I was just wondering how she got here." I say as we get out of the van. Niall helps her out of the van and puts an arm around her shoulder.

As I bring up the rear Paul stops me, "Look, I know you aren't thrilled about this but give her a break she didn't even want to come because her nerves are so bad. She has maybe said twenty words to me on the flight. Simon wants her here because he thinks this is what you guys need so....."

I cut him off already knowing what he is going to say. "So don't fuck this up." I sigh as I enter the dressing room. The guys are shooting me looks as if I don't already know I've messed up, I don't want to be in the doghouse much longer so I decide to formally apologize. But as I'm about to do so I don't see her anywhere. "Where did Alexandria go?"

"No idea. She kind wandered off once we got inside." Liam says with a slight worried expression.

*****************************************************************************************************

Alex's POV

<sigh> This is exactly what I didn't want to happen. I just wanted to stay on comfort zone. I can feel my mood shifting to depression so I do one of the few things that calm me when I'm depressed.

"Hello?"

"Hey T. I know it is late. I just need to talk."

"Alex, what happened?" She asks groggily. I give her a run down of what has happened and she takes a breath "He is a man who obviously can't deal with the fact that you are so special and talented. If everyone else is being nice to you don't let one prick try to drag you down."

I let her words penetrate my heart and think on things. <sigh> "Ok I'm going to show them all how talented I am. Thanks T. I don't know what I'd do with out you."

"No problem. Night."

"Night." I hang up the phone and pull out my headphones. I need some real music to clear my head. I felt kind of old school so I played some Maroon 5 Songs About Jane. Listening to this album always calms my nerves.

Listening to Adam Levine's voice gives me a pretty wicked beat, then I start thinking over the conversation with T, 'Don't let anyone drag you down'. I made notes on my phone and my fingers start flying as I'm typing out lyrics. Apparently, I was so in the zone that I didn't notice anyone come up to me. I feel a hand touch my shoulder and it makes me jump out of my skin. "What?"

It was Harry looking pretty hot minus his shitty attitude. He looked at me with big green eyes that I could see why the women love him. "Ummm, I'm sorry for earlier I haven't really been myself lately. I didn't mean to say that. Can you please...."

"Please what?  Just don't worry about it.  You already don't like me for whatever reason so, lets just steer clear of each other and everything will be ok.  Alright?"  I reply without shedding a tear or batting an eye.  The look on his face was of shock.  He stood there a moment about to open his mouth.  "Just go back and get ready.  I have songs to write."  With those few words I leave him standing there speechless and speed walk to the nearest ladies room so I can get a few more moments of peace of quiet because my mind is racing with song lyrics.  Maybe proving people wrong will fuel the fire that I need.  <sigh>  I wonder if they have a spare guitar for me to use......

*****************************************************************************************************

Harry's POV

I can't bloody believe she dismissed me like I was nothing!  I was trying to give her a heart felt apology and cover my ass at the same time.  Not going to lie, I hate that I did say that out loud to her because I really know nothing about her, plus she is only here to help. Walking back to my dressing room I start warming up my vocals.  But this just adds to the stress I'm already feeling.  I'll find a way to make it up to her, but after the show.  I need my head in the game.

"Did you find her?"  Liam asks, he is always playing Daddy Direction.

"I did."

"And?"  He stops  lifting weights long enough to look at me.  I swear that is his new favorite pass time.  

"Well I tried...."

"You tried?!!  Harry.  Seriously?" he rolls his eyes.  

"She didn't want to hear it.  She just shut me down and sprinted away."

"Well bull lox, you have to make it right.  Soon."  Liam replies as he walks away from me.  "Next time think before you speak.  She is a nice girl."

*****************************************************************************************************

Alex's POV

The news of me being new to the whole concert spread pretty quickly because when I asked for a spare acoustic guitar it took them no time to let me borrow one I guess they know their job kind of depend on me to write music.  I sit on the counter in the ladies room and start getting a melody in my head.  There was a knock on the door.

"Yes?"  I ask.

It was a male's voice but not really sure who's.  "Alexandria?"  

"You can just call me Alex.  And can I help you?"  I reply shyly.

"Can I come in?"

"Umm, I guess so.  Who is it?"

"Niall."

"Sure come in."  The adorable blonde hair,  blue eyed, guy comes into the bathroom which was probably the size of my bedroom back home.  He looks at the fact I'm sitting on the counter with headphones on, guitar out, and my notepad writing stuff down.  Still unsure of my mood he stands in front of the sink, glancing in the mirror then back at the mess I have on the counter.

"You ok?"  I look at him and pull my ear plugs fully out, I can tell he is sincerely asking about my well being.

"Well, when I finish this song I might be ok.  I'm just in the zone and need this out of my system.  Why?"

He flashes me a quick smile.  "You are already writing?  I thought we were supposed to be doing it together."

"Yes, you are but right now I'm in the zone and can't afford to lose this."

"Aye!  Can I hear what you have so far?"

That question really throws me off guard, I know that eventually they will have to see my work first hand.  I look at him moment thinking over if I really want to do this.  "OK,"  I slowly start to drum the cords out on the guitar,

"I've got fire for a heart

I'm not scared of the dark

You've never seen it look so easy

I got a river for a soul

And baby you're a boat

Baby you're my only reason."  

I stop and look at him then continue, "I'm not sure what would be the other part of the verse  but I have the chorus

All my life

You stood by me

When no one else was ever behind me

All these lights

They can't blind me

With your love, nobody can drag me down"  

I finish playing and give him a look indicating that I needed his opinion.

"I like it.  Did you  just come up with it?"

"Yes.  Was feeling down about the car ride and I had to call my bestie, then I listened to Maroon 5 and now I'm feeling a little better.  I can't let anyone drag me down.  Even your bandmate."  

Niall starts packing my stuff up for me.  I cock my head to the side.  "I know Harry can be a pain, but he is the baby of the group so I just don't think he realizes how much of a jack ass he can be at times.  And I'm only packing your stuff up so you can watch the show."  He pulls me off the counter and pulls me in for brief hug.  "It will get better I promise."

"If you say so."  I mumble into his chest.

"I do.  Come and watch us.  Please."  He does a puppy dog face which causes me to smile.

"You are a lady killer I swear.  You look innocent then you pull that.  Don't think it will work all the time on me."  I say with a a smirk.  He gives me a quick wink.

"I know it won't always work but I'm going to milk it until it no longer does."  He puts an arm around me and lead me back to their dressing room.  With Niall looking out for me maybe this trip won't be so bad.  I'm ready to see what these boys have to offer.  

[bountyofbeads]

https://www.wired.com/story/john-ratcliffe-dni-trump-nominee-danger/

What could go wrong with a DNI who misleads about his own resume?

. @Wired "The idea that a person prone to wild conspiracy theories might soon occupy the role legally designated to be the final voice in the president’s ear on intelligence matters should terrify Americans—as well as both our allies and adversaries the world over." https://t.co/hsqdaD1ISK

THE DANGER OF JOHN RATCLIFFE

By GARRETT M. GRAFF | Published July 30, 2019 6:30 PM ET | Wired | Posted July 31, 2019 11:01 AM ET |

THE PRESIDENT’S INTENT to nominate Robert Mueller’s chief Capitol Hill inquisitor to head the nation’s intelligence community might just be the Trump administration’s most alarming personnel decision yet—even in an administration whose list of departed, disgraced, and indicted former top officials reads like a casualty list from Game of Thrones.

The news Sunday that Trump planned to tap representative John Ratcliffe (R-Texas) as director of national intelligence, replacing former senator Dan Coats, left many even on Capitol Hill scratching their heads: Who? “I don’t know John. I’ve met him a couple times, seen him on TV,” Senate Homeland Security Committee chair Ron Johnson (R-Wisconsin) toldPolitico, among other choice quotes it gathered.

Indeed, very few Americans had ever heard of the congressman from Texas’s fourth district until last Wednesday’s House Judiciary Committee hearing, when Ratcliffe lambasted former special counsel Robert Mueller about “not exonerating” Donald Trump. Watching the hearing on TV with a group of journalists, I turned to my colleagues and said, “He’s auditioning to be DNI.”

Days later, Axios scooped the news of Ratcliffe’s impending nomination, saying Trump was “thrilled” by the congressman’s performance at the Mueller hearing.

That the administration is so predictable in its terrible choices should not make those terrible choices any less troubling.

The men who have occupied the relatively new role of DNI so far are among the most experienced intelligence leaders and diplomats in the country. After the job was created as part of the post-9/11 reshuffling of the US national security apparatus, George W. Bush tapped an experienced hand to fill it: John Negroponte had served as an ambassador in four countries, including Iraq; been UN ambassador; and worked at the National Security Council. His successor, Mike McConnell, was a vice admiral in the Navy and a former director of the National Security Agency. Barack Obama’s first DNI was another admiral, Dennis Blair, who had led Pacific Command and served as associate director of the CIA.

James Clapper, Obama’s second pick as DNI, was arguably the most experienced intelligence officer in the entire country—a career Air Force intelligence officer who had served for four decades, risen to the rank of lieutenant general, and personally headed two of the nation’s most critical intelligence agencies, the Defense Intelligence Agency and the National Geospatial-Intelligence Agency. Clapper had also served as undersecretary of defense for intelligence, where he oversaw all three of the Pentagon’s intel agencies: DIA, NGA, and the National Reconnaissance Office, which runs the nation’s spy satellites.

And even though Coats, the outgoing DNI who Ratcliffe may replace, had no field intelligence background, he served in the Army during the Vietnam War, spent nearly 30 years in Congress—in both the House and the Senate, including stints on the intelligence committee—and had served as ambassador to one of America’s top allies, Germany.

Ratcliffe’s experience pales in comparison to any of his would-be predecessors. He served as the mayor of Heath, Texas—population 8,000—for a decade, and while he did a brief stint as a politically appointed US attorney in Texas in the final months of George W. Bush’s administration, his résumé on national security matters is practically nonexistent.

He had previously claimed to be involved in a single terrorism-related case, against the Holy Land Foundation, but appears to have far overstated his role. As ABC News’ James Gordon Meek reportedTuesday, “The fact is that @RepRatcliffe did not convict anyone in the Holy Land Foundation trial. His staff now admits he simply reviewed the first mistrial and issued no report to [attorney general Mike] Mukasey, which is why no one we contacted remembers him at all.”

Similarly confounding, he asserts on his House website that he once “arrested 300 illegal aliens in a single day,” which would have been quite a feat, since US attorneys don’t have arrest authority.

That lack of experience is almost certain to make Ratcliffe an ineffective DNI, a position that has little direct power and whose few levers and moral suasion only Clapper—the longest-serving DNI yet—managed to handle effectively.

But while Ratcliffe will likely have trouble herding the cats that make up the nation’s 17 sprawling intelligence agencies, ranging from the Justice Department to the State Department to the Pentagon to even the Energy Department, that’s not what seems primed to make him a dangerous DNI.

The biggest danger Ratcliffe poses is to the integrity of the job of director of national intelligence in the first place; the core principle of the intelligence professional is to speak truth to power.

The US spends $60 billion a year on the nation’s intelligence apparatus, a workforce of tens of thousands ranging from CIA officers and FBI agents to NSA cryptologists and hackers, NGA analysts, interpretation experts at the NRO, financial wizards at the Treasury Department’s Office of Intelligence and Analysis, and much more.

All of that money and all of those workers share a simple uniting goal: To ensure that the president of the United States is, in every conversation and decision, the most informed, knowledgeable, best-prepared person in the room. They enable the president and his advisers to anticipate problems and opportunities; understand the mind, decisionmaking, and internal pressures of foreign leaders far and wide; know from satellites overhead, cables underground, and agents in the field what’s happening the world over—and why.

The career analysts, agents, officers, and leaders of the intelligence community work every day to ensure that the information flowing up to the Oval Office is the most thorough, accurate, and best-analyzed it can be. That mission requires that the information presented to the president be presented in a fair, objective, nonpartisan, and apolitical manner. (The rare instances where the CIA or other agencies have skewed their intelligence toward political ends, as with the run-up to the Iraq War, only underscore the devastating consequences of anything less than fair-eyed analysis.)

It’s here that the DNI plays his most important role. By statute, the DNI is the president’s lead intelligence adviser. That’s supposed to mean that the DNI leads the effort to provide the President’s Daily Brief—the world’s most elite newspaper—filled with daily intelligence and big-picture analysis of global, geopolitical trends affecting the US, its allies, and its adversaries. That role of chief intelligence adviser is one that Coats, Trump’s outgoing DNI, never quite grew into. Mike Pompeo arrived first in the administration as CIA director, before Coats was confirmed, big-footed the PDB, and hit it off with Trump before Coats could really establish a bond with the commander-in-chief.

Yet Coats did try to speak truth to power. He spoke up when it mattered, was honest about Russia’s attack on the 2016 election, and was willing to contradict Trump publicly on the future of North Korea’s nuclear program. One of Coats’ final acts as DNI actually was to appoint the nation’s first election security czar. That honesty appears to be a not insignificant part of why Coats was shoved aside, and ultimately out the door.

With a president so divorced from daily reality as Trump, it’s all the more important to fill the role of DNI with someone whose first duty is to puncture the Fox News fever swamp bubble that surrounds the White House, provide real facts and grounded analysis, and ensure—to whatever extent possible—that the information that flows into the Oval Office and the decisions that flow out of it are informed and strategic.

There’s little evidence that Ratcliffe is the man for the job. Beyond his antics cross-examining Mueller last week, he’s long been on the leading edge of criticizing the Russia investigation writ large. He was even the congressman who started the completely false rumor that the FBI—one of the intel agencies he is set to oversee—had an anti-Trump “secret society.”

Ratcliffe seems to appeal to Trump for the same reason most of the sycophants around him do: Loyalty first and foremost to No. 1. But the DNI is not supposed to walk through the door of the Oval Office attempting to please the president—he is supposed to tell the president whatever he needs to hear, consequences be damned.

Trump wants nothing of the kind. Instead, as he told reporters Tuesday afternoon, “We need somebody strong that can really rein it in. Because as I think you've all learned, the intelligence agencies have run amok. They've run amok.”

The fact that Trump, who has  skirmished with the  intelligencecommunity ever since the campaign, still sees the truth-telling tradition of the intelligence world as making them his adversaries rather than his allies underscores how little Donald Trump has risen to the role of the commander-in-chief. As The New Yorker’s David Rohde wrote this week, the message Trump sends with Ratcliffe's appointment is clear: Be loyal or leave.

That’s a recipe for the type of geopolitical mistake that gets Americans killed.

The idea that a person prone to wild conspiracy theories might soon occupy the role legally designated to be the final voice in the president’s ear on intelligence matters should terrify Americans—as well as both its allies and adversaries the world over. The fact that Senate GOP members have so far been relatively muted in their support for Ratcliffe encourages hope that maybe this disaster-in-waiting might be averted.

[xtruss]

MAY 12, 2021 | US History

The ‘Chinese-Born Engineer’ Who ‘Helped Launch US Commercial Aviation’

Wong Tsu’s 10 months at Boeing in 1916-17 led to the fledgling airplane manufacturer's first military plane, first airmail plane and eventually, its first passenger plane.

— Ratha Tep

Wong Tsu, Boeing's first aeronautical engineer, graduated from MIT in 1916. He is pictured here the following year.

In 1904, anti-Asian sentiment in the U.S. rose to a fever pitch as Congress passed an indefinite extension of the Chinese Exclusion Act, almost entirely closing the gates on Chinese immigration. Yet just over a decade later, Beijing-born Wong Tsu came to study at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology through a loophole in the law that made an exception for students. Shortly after graduating from MIT’s new aeronautical program in June 1916, Wong was hired as Boeing’s first aeronautical engineer, cementing his place in aviation history.

The turn of the 20th century was an era of remarkable growth for flight, and Wong played a crucial role: He was integral in designing Boeing’s first successful plane, the Boeing Model C. That became the company’s first military plane, its first used to carry mail and the catalyst to the development of the Model 40A, the first Boeing aircraft to carry passengers.

“The Model C was not only Boeing’s first production order, it was the first Boeing aircraft to be produced in large numbers and sold,” says Tom Crouch, curator emeritus at the Smithsonian’s National Air and Space Museum, and author of several books, including Wings: A History of Aviation from Kites to the Space Age. “Wong Tsu put the company on the map,” he says.

From Bicycle Mechanics to Stuntmen

While Wong was still a child in China, Wilbur and Orville Wright, two bicycle mechanics from Dayton, Ohio, made history in 1903 with the first powered, sustained and controlled airplane flight over the dunes of Kitty Hawk. The Wright brothers envisioned a future where planes carried mail and passengers, but aviation in the pre-World War I period was initially met with skepticism.

The first aircraft were extremely frail with few instruments, relegating flight to the realm of sensational spectacle as stunt pilots flew to curious onlookers at carnivals and county fairs. Heavy winds were particularly troublesome, and anxious pilots preferred to fly only in the early morning or late afternoon, when the air was at its calmest.

Wong Comes to MIT

At the age of 12, Wong was selected for the Manchu government’s Yang-Tai naval academy, and at 16, he became one of the first Chinese naval cadets sent to England to study naval engineering. The Chinese government then sent him to study the fledgling science of aviation at MIT.

At MIT, Wong used the university’s new four-foot-square wind tunnel—one of the first in the country of its kind—to conduct controlled experiments and gain rare insight into aerodynamic stability. With a thesis on Air Resistance of Cylinder Combinations, Wong in 1916 became one of the few degreed aeronautical engineers in the country.

Boeing's First Plane: The B & W

In the final assembly stage in May, 1916, closeup of the student's cockpit on the Boeing and Westervelt Sport Trainer Model 1. Museum of Flight/Corbis/Getty Images

On July 4, 1914, William Edward Boeing, a successful lumber company owner in Seattle, convinced early aviator Terah Maroney to take him on his Curtiss seaplane. Boeing’s maiden flight reinforced what he already believed: The future was in aviation.

Boeing also felt he could build a better plane—he just needed the right aeronautical engineer. He turned to a friend, Naval Lieutenant George Conrad Westervelt, who had spent time at MIT and was stationed at the naval shipyards in nearby Bremerton. Together, they created Pacific Aero Products Co., and named their first aircraft the B & W, after their respective initials. Unfortunately, the B & W showed a tendency to tilt while airborne during tests for the Navy in 1916. While the issue was rectified, the damage had been done, and not a single B & W plane was ever sold in the U.S.

After Westervelt was assigned by the Navy back East, he consulted with Jerome C. Hunsaker, the aeronautics program founder at MIT, on a replacement engineer. Hunsaker recommended Wong. Boeing, upon learning of Wong’s vast wind tunnel expertise, responded by telegram: “Engage Chinaman.”

Anti-Chinese Sentiment in the Pacific Northwest

During Wong’s time at MIT, students from China made up the largest percentage of foreigners. They participated not only in research, but in the essential fabric of student life, taking part in everything from athletics to theater. But on the West Coast, particularly in the Pacific Northwest, people of Asian descent had a very different experience. In 1885, a giant mob in Tacoma, Washington forcefully expelled hundreds of Chinese residents, herding them to a nearby railway station. In 1886, nearly 400 more in Seattle were dragged from their homes, and led to a steamer bound for San Francisco.

It was a perilous time to be Chinese in Seattle. To lure Wong, Boeing personally gave assurances for his safety, according to Key Donn, a former president of the Boeing Asian American Professional Association. That promise paid off in spades.

Boeing's Model C

The Dope Room at the Boeing aircraft factory, shown here in 1917, is where airplane wings like this Model C wing structure were designed and constructed. Museum of Flight/Corbis/Getty Images

Wong played an integral role in developing the Model C training seaplane, which incorporated several mold-breaking innovations: tThe wings tilted slightly upwards, with the upper wing sitting forward of the lower wing rather than being stacked for greater stability. Crucially, Wong was also able to test a model in a newly built wind tunnel at the University of Washington, and apply his data analytical skills honed at MIT.

Boeing was so proud of the seaplane, that he referred to it as the first “all-Boeing” design. The Model C first flew on Nov. 5, 1916, and an improved Model C, with a bigger rudder, made its first flight on April 9, 1917. Two weeks later, Boeing changed the name of Pacific Aero Products Co. to Boeing Airplane Co.

After test flights at the Naval Air Station in Pensacola, Florida in the summer of 1917, Navy officials were also impressed. Despite 35-m.p.h. winds, the Model C proved better than anything they had seen. They ordered 50 Model Cs for a price of $575,000. Considering the total value of all aircraft orders in the U.S. in 1914 totaled just under $800,000, it was a substantial order by any measure and launched Boeing as a successful airplane manufacturer.

From Naval Contracts to Airmail and Passengers

On March 3, 1919, William Boeing (right) and pilot Eddie Hubbard performed the first U.S. international airmail flight in this Boeing Model C, a modified World War I trainer they flew from Vancouver, Canada, to Seattle.

After World War I, the Model C made history again. On March 3, 1919, Boeing and his lead test pilot, Eddie Hubbard, flew the C-700, the final Model C ever built, with a bag of 60 letters from Vancouver, British Columbia, to Seattle, in North America’s first international airmail flight.

That momentous airmail flight opened the doors to another route: the country’s longest, San Francisco to Chicago, which Hubbard lobbied Boeing to successfully bid on in 1927. The plane used for the route, the Model 40A, not only had cargo space for mail, but also a tiny cabin with room for two passengers. By the end of the first year, writes Alain Pelletier, in Boeing: The Complete Story, the Model 40A planes had transported 379 tons of mail and 1,863 passengers, paving the way for Boeing’s remarkable success in commercial aviation.

Wong Heads Back to China 🇨🇳

In Seattle, Wong’s contributions are memorialized at the Museum of Flight with a permanent exhibit acknowledging his work as Boeing’s first engineer. Despite the extraordinary ripple effects of Wong’s contributions at Boeing, he only spent 10 months at the company, leaving for China shortly before the Model C’s test flights for the Navy. Wong would go on to create a legacy that ranged from starting his home country’s first airplane factory in Fuzhou in 1917 to becoming head of the Aviation Research Academy in 1945, earning his place as one of the founding fathers of Chinese aviation.

[jesperfilth24]

Keen with Psychopathy | Discarded Chapter

The dusty brink walls weren’t as uncomfortable as Keen had expected. His head leaned back; drowned by the priceless view. Not of the sun that rose across the glass river, but of the famous Greg Gallrantree who struggled his walk. An inevitable, funny attempt of survival.

Particles of dirt and wooden grain floated around Keen’s Velcro suit. From his prey, he was at the perfect distance; the perfect circumstance; the perfect aim. Construction barrels covered his silhouette. The roof’s shade fell on Keen’s blond scalp as he peaked out.

Action would commence, and he’d get a front-row seat. His sniper rifle clicked. Swayed in gloved hands. His trousers’ belt bore the rouge pistol he kept, though, only on important missions, he’d ever used it. He couldn’t hold his smile. And who would to this sight?

Greg dragged his leg. Bullets had been shot in his left. Blood spilled like a bottle without its cap. Grass soaked the hemoglobin, and turned them into a dry, pale red. He gritted his teeth. Mouth deteriorated by Tabaco and Cocaine. Grunts and swears spewed. Keen’s gun unlocked. The Target limped to the dock’s departure.

Every sound of pain exhilarated Keen. Every groan and adult complaint which escaped Greg’s lips. What struggle, even though death was irrefutable! Everything he’d get, he deserved, and perhaps, had it better with him and Dully to execute him. A pair of Occidere, called or by post-mail to kill whoever tramps maliciously on the Land of the Free, and Home of the Brave. That week’s lucky contestant was Greg Gallentree, a cinematic producer of children shows. Fond of them on set, but fonder of them in bed a tad more.

The eighteen year-old assassin, Keen Tuer. He was to kill him, it was set in stone.

He didn’t do all the work, however.

The shots on Greg’s right leg were skilled; surprisingly skilled; Compared to Dully’s complete miss he’d done two weeks ago. His fever had dragged for ages, yet after ailment, Dully still had it. The bullets here were perfect. They pierced Greg’s leathery epidermis. Inside, gold shone, as red hurried out. Keen nodded his head in agreement. Good progress; wonderful progress even. He smiled, one he showed daily, though, the difference was it wasn’t merely derived from torment or pain. He learned from him? Cute.

Greg jingled his array of keys, herded by a single ring. His one-legged limp continued. The door two yards away. He picked through his keys as he limped closer.

Fingers frantic. He rummaged through the collage of noisy metal. Not the silver short one. Nor the long bronze one either. ‘C’mon…c’mon’ he whispered. Or tried to. Keen could hear it from the abandoned fishing house.

Greg twirled his fingers. Twenty-two keys clanked and brushed together. A handicap for he owned too many estates. Then, Greg twitched with joy. His hand fondled a small ebony key. He exhaled, and rested on the threshold of his pearl yacht. He filled the master lock. It squeaked; it turned; it cried, and it was nothing but a signal; a cue.

Keen raised the scope to his eye, finger on the trigger. Ready for the harsh pull, but he held back. He anticipated the man’s relief. To kill him, wasn’t his only priority, though it was a large part of it. It was to see him relax, draw quiet prayers for a God he didn’t believe in, just for Keen to reap the opportunity away from him. That drive . . . it kept him in such a wonderful job. His innocent smile turned schizophrenic, crafted for adaption. He tapped the trigger. Breath moderate. Toes steady. Hand lusted haste. The bullet went amiss. A quiet pop omitted from the gun.

It pierced Greg’s dangling gold necklace. It’d dung rather than bled. He idled; hand on the door knob. His expression pathetic. A dog who did a misdeed. Even a dirty mutt would know his mistakes, and Greg’s karma was in the form of a French teen with a swift murderous instinct.

He aimed. Scope fluctuated between his neck and his brain. Should he do a bullet to the head? But such a death would be so immediate, it’d be bliss. No—it had to be painful.  And news had it that the piranhas were still active.

Reloaded—Keen shot another shell to his intact support. The leg Dully hadn’t shot. The left one. It burst; new, exposed gushes squished, as the bullet took leverage into his thigh. Greg inclined backward. Hands flailed the same rhythm as his scream sang its delightful song. A splash wetted the dock; and now it served a murky red river. Bubbles rose to a surface like the tiny fish that dwelled at his body. And when the blood turned transparent, it mimicked the Kool-aid dear Dully had drunk an hour ago. His body was a sunk raft for little illegal creatures to feed on.

WL Zoo had been at it with their piranha smuggling conflicts. They’d dumped hazardous species in the river after the police—real police—busted them. When will they learn?

But then again, why’d Greg parked his yacht at the hotspot located in infested waters? Was he that stupid? The harbor across had been filled with schooners. Sails cracked and weathered sailors howled. Didn’t have enough room. He’d rather take piranha’s than poor sailors? Imbecile.

The rich just believe to be immortal.

He knelt along the gravel, Greg’s body floated, then struck the river bed. Fish nipped at his drug pumped flesh. Could they get high off that? Probably.

A branch crushed behind him. Tactless and ditzy movement. Keen turned, eyes perked up, his insomnia, three hours of sleep unapparent. It was obvious who it’d been.

Dully bowed, ‘Good morning Master.’ And Keen nodded.

He stepped against the salmon grass and gravel as he came beside him. He stood, out-of-place. His hand rubbed at his bare white shoulder. The only thing exposed in his cat suit.

He swiped short glances at Keen. Cyan—maybe a little more blue—eyes stared. They engrossed himself with the view of Keen.

He’d look back. His neck tense. Dully’s eyes on them, then on the sky. He’d pretended. He’d looked at him. Keen turned away, and he could feel it. His eyes on him. He was looking at him profusely. Though his intention unclear. What did he want?

Keen turned to start the conversation, eyes lay on his skinny figure ‘, The man’s death was quite satisfying don’t you think?’

Not a good conversation topic, but enough for Keen to infer as to why he was anxious.

‘Ah yes Master,’ Dully agreed, he would agree, even though he gagged whenever Keen mentioned killing. But from the way his eyes trailed, and the deep, possibly even deeper glare than what it first had been, this was different. ‘It was very satisfying,’ and Keen faced at the horizon.

Dully stared again, a wave swished along the back of Keen’s hand. The dock a washed brown. Dully opened his mouth. He hanged the words along the edge of his tongue, before he retracted them.

Just say it Dully, just say it!

But he didn’t. Pure silence, pure wave, pure awkwardness.

It wasn’t his responsibility to ask him what was wrong. Dully was fourteen, old enough to say what he needed say, wasn’t he? Keen sighed, warm air rubbed against his veined arm; Dully couldn’t do anything, he needed him, or else he’d die. He couldn’t start a conversation without him. Keen raised, eyes rolled, they kissed the sky—Like always, he must do everything.

He twisted his head, possession looked away at the nick of time. ‘Why’re staring at me so intently? You want me?’ Yes, this was a cringe-inducing one-liner. To break the ice was a good option. It didn’t embarrass him. Dully was a different story.

He blushed, cheeks almost the same color as the splatter of blood beneath his feet.

‘No! I just . . . um…’ he trailed. ‘I just wanted to ask what you think of my shots.’

‘Your shots?’

‘Yes, on Greg, I mean.’ He twiddled his pointers, legs rubbed together. The red on his face defined, bright. What did he want? Like… A compliment?

‘They were okay,’ Keen said. No elaboration, nothing. His heart warmed. He wanted to see how Dully would react. Did he think of Keen as important? He lusted a satisfying reaction. Suzuki, if she was here, she’d do the same.

‘Ah I see . . .’ Dully’s face darkened. Lips pursed, hidden into their thickness. His eyes formed imperceptible water along the tiny crevices between the white orbs and Asian slits. But with a heavy gulp, he seemed to hold it in. Same melodramatic Dully. But he did have somewhat of a reason to be sad.

He had worked hard. No days of sleep, to perfect his gun skills, while Keen had laid on the sofa for a nap. It was hard to sleep at all, much less of a chance with a nitwit shooting a gun. He was handier with a knife. The blade he’d given Dully. A small dagger with a blue line in the middle. He too, would use it only on important missions. Though, compared to his gun, it didn’t mean anything of significance.

Another wave has splashed; a boomed click in his sick brain. It’d hit him; a question which itched him to be answered.

How far does his opinion of me extend? Is it that important to him?

He shouldn’t take it. It’d break him, he was too sensitive—

‘Master…do you think I’m improving?’

The satisfaction was right there for the taking.

He had to grab it.

He had to

‘No,’ Keen lied. ‘I don’t think you are…’

His gulps echoed along Keen’s eardrum. Satisfying. The pain delicious within him, the pain he wished he could monopolized. The pain he had monopolized.

This wasn’t enough, he needed to go the extra mile.

‘I think you should though.’

Dully leaned forward. ‘W-why?’ he stuttered. Eyes blinked as if they’d been peppered. ‘What’ll happen if I don’t improve—Master?’

Keen hid the chuckle behind the sudden seriousness of his voice. ‘Then I guess I have to throw you away.’

To hurt him was a trance. Beyond explanation. To see how his soul fell upward for a brief moment. The sight of his heart getting broken by his measly words were better than every kill he like. He loved his despair.

Keen shot up. ‘Alright, let’s go home, Mister Cooter is probably waiting for us…Dully?…Dully?’

He shook his head, eyes pushed to a heavy close as his navy blue hair flew around him, ‘Ah yes yes Master. Let’s…let’s go.’

He waddled behind him, body shifted as lifeless as Greg’s. And they ventured to the limo.

[thatgirland]

Am I the only one who [insert typically unoriginal idea here]?

No, you are not. The fact that you even ask this question shows how unoriginal you are. Ironically, we typically ask this question because we are looking for confirmation that someone else agrees with us. In fact, agreement on certain topics often becomes the seed that blossoms into friendship. However, this question is not an invitation. We don’t ask “Does anyone else _______?” Instead we emphasize “only,” hoping that the answer is yes.

Yes, you are the only person that puts their cereal in the bowl before the milk. You are an anomaly. An American Hero. The messiah that has been selected to spread your teachings of cereal preparation to others.

We find ourselves constantly hoping that we have stumbled upon some originality in a world that seems to be lacking.

Despite the constant desire to feel interconnected, we tend to take pride in the belief that there is something about ourselves that makes us unique from the herd. After seeing Black Panther, I kept on telling my boyfriend how some scenes reminded me of The Lion King. I didn’t think that it was an astute observation, but I did think that it demonstrated some intellect on my part to make the connection. That is, until I logged onto Twitter and saw a tweet that mirrored my exact observations (to further my point, here are images taken from two different posts on two different sites, neither of them being Twitter):

So whenever you feel alone, just remember,

that those kings will always be there to guide you… and so will I.

  Now, I know what you are thinking, my assigned FBI agent must have relayed the information to the NSA, yet this was not the case. My agent is sleeping on me because I have mentioned several golden gems (that’s right, I am giving you the go ahead) and have yet to seem them blossom into fruition (*cough* plan your own movie ending *cough* {for serious inquiries on this, please contact}). I remember watching Shark Tank and becoming frustrated over the fact that someone stole MY idea for an invention (yet mine would have been more fashion-forward). The idea that was sparked over the need to make walking with my phone and umbrella a little easier. The idea that was ignited because I had a difficulty with just keeping my phone in my pocket as I held my umbrella. The idea that was probably thought of by thousands of others since I am not the only person that has developed an addiction to my phone, so much so that I would rather have my umbrella blow every which way than to keep my phone in my pocket.

“And I know,  And I know, And I know, And I know, And I know, And I don’t know”

The fact of the matter is, we are not entirely special – despite this mindset being instilled upon us from an early age. We inhabit the same place, engage with the same routines, so we will naturally have the same responses to those interactions. We like to believe that we are all unique. That there is something about us that makes us different – in a good way. That we are all our own little Ruldophs (which is a problem in itself – when we are the ones that are different, it is positive. When others are different, it is often the opposite).

Not everyone is the exact same, but we all possess the same traits and habits, just slightly altered. We are essentially all cut from the same cloth yet the seamstress can develop many different shapes and sizes to fool us into thinking that different patterns exist. Like when you go to Old Navy and see one pattern used for a dress, skirt, shirt, shoes, and bag (don’t worry, I worked there), I am sure that you can talk to any person and discover at least one similarity. Yes, I am aware that this is not a complex concept, but it needs to be said.

 “And so we are all connected in the great circle of life”

– Mufasa

Surprisingly, it was not until recently that I discovered just how mundane my entire life is. This is all thanks to meme culture. Ironically, memes are defined as “an element of a culture or system of behavior that may be considered to be passed from one individual to another by nongenetic means, especially imitation.” As nothing in life is truly original (after thousands of years, how can it be?), we develop copies, sometimes exact, others with modifications (interested in this topic? Enroll at Queens College and take a course on Simulacra). The term history repeats itself is less metaphorical than we would like to believe. Although we all possess the same innate desires and instincts, we tend to believe that our experiences are what make us unique. However, memes have proved that this is simply not the case.

When we come across a meme we like, we typically adhere to the three archetypes. (1) We laugh, write “I’m weak *cryface emoji”; (2) “I’m dead *skull*”; or for the more poetic: (3) “MEEE!” The fact that our responses tend to boil down to these three options is telling as well. We find the meme humorous because there is a ring of truth to it. This universality is the basis for comedy. Comedians are storytellers – the only difference is that they report life rather than fantasies. When I was in Atlanta, I watched an Open Mic, and I can easily recall the joke that made me laugh the most. The comedian was referring to the fire drill implemented during elementary school: Stop, Drop, and Roll: “Kids nowadays, they don’t practice that shit! In the 90’s catching on fire was such a problem that we had to invent a whole system for it, but today, kids have discovered that all they have to do is not catch on fire.” The audience responded well, but would the same response be present if the joke was repeated to a newer generation that never had to roll around putting out imaginary fires? Or if the audience were home-schooled and they practiced changing the batteries for the fire detector?

This leads us back to meme culture. We reblog, repost, retweet, or share because part of us is excited that there is a community of others like us. A tiny part of us feels slighted, maybe even robbed: You mean other people did this as well? What does that mean about me?

Suddenly, that one experience that tokened our individuality is revoked. As much as we want to feel like we are part of the collective, there is another part of us that wants to be the one happy yellow smiley-face in a sea of unhappy blue (if you can immediately recall the image, my point is proven once again). We want to be like everyone else, but we also want to be the one in the group that is slightly (only in a good way) different.

And that is just it. We are so fixated on differences that acknowledging similarities seems like a removal of self. We can only identify ourselves through the existence of an other. We feel like we have been robbed when we should really feel like we have gained. Yes, you may be special – but so is everyone else.  It may seem like I am contradicting myself since earlier I stated that we are not entirely special – so let me clarify, we are not entirely, but partly. Special can be defined as “better, greater, or otherwise different from what is usual.” We are not better or greater than others, but we are different from what is usual since normalcy is a myth. Why then does acknowledging others as special makes us feel less than? It is only this notion of uniqueness that we feel is reduced once more is identified. A rose is still a rose despite being packed with eleven others.

Perhaps it is best that we are not entirely different from everyone else. To go back to Ruldolph – yes he was different, and he was a hero, but he “wasn’t allowed to join any reindeer games” until he proved that his differences made him valuable. The truth of the matter is, in a society that praises individuality, we simultaneously frown upon it. We only like differences once they are shown to be practical, and once that happens, we replicate those differences until they seemingly lose their practicality. Constantly replacing the Mufasas with Simbas, until they are one in the same (have you seen Simba grown up next to his father?)

  “I know I’m Not the Only One” : How Black Panther and Meme Culture Taught Me About Individuality Am I the only one who ? No, you are not. The fact that you even…

[junker-town]

Yes, Notre Dame has a path to the 2017 College Football Playoff, whether you like it or not

Let’s keep track of Week 8’s biggest games as final scores roll in, Playoff committee-style.

Below, let’s keep track of Week 8’s ranked games in a way similar to the College Football Playoff committee’s perspective.

For the committee, it’s not about what you did this week. It’s about what your entire schedule did all year long. Beating a team in Week 8 that finishes .500-plus is better than beating a team that doesn’t, no matter where either team is ranked at kickoff. The same goes for a team that finishes in the Playoff’s Top 25. The committee also looks at whether your offense and defense outscored your opponent’s average opponent, how your full-season numbers are holding up, and other factors.

Committee rankings won’t be out until Oct. 31, so we’ll stick with AP Poll rankings for now.

We’ll have fun stuff and gameplay analysis elsewhere and later on. This post is only about how these results are likely to impact the Playoff picture.

Win projections are via S&P+. Final scores are in bold.

Probably big deals!

No. 19 Michigan (5-1) at No. 2 Penn State (6-0): Sudden onset JIM HARBAUGH IS OVERRATED arguments aside, the rebuilding Wolverines are probably still going 8-4, meaning a quality W is available for PSU.

No. 11 USC (6-1) at No. 13 Notre Dame (5-1): Are you ready to resume the annual debate about whether the Irish should be Playoff-eligible despite being independent? Anyone who’d assured themselves the Irish were out of the Playoff race because they lost one game: I have bad news. Beating the Pac-12 South favorite and then giving NC State its second loss would likely give the Irish one of the 10-best résumés as of Halloween, with two to four more ranked opponents after that. If ND wins out, I’m convinced ND is in, unless Georgia’s the other team battling for No. 4. UGA would have head-to-head and likely at least a division title to claim, something else the Irish can’t match. (Or USC could win in South Bend and make all this moot.)

Should at least have some impact

Tennessee (3-3) at No. 1 Alabama (7-0): Memes aside, Tennessee is probably still a 6-6 team, barely.

Syracuse (4-3) at No. 8 Miami (5-0): The Orange project as a borderline bowl team, but I think they’ll make it in.

No. 9 Oklahoma (5-1) at Kansas State (3-3): K-State still has a shot at a bowl. This is a chance at a road win, if nothing else.

No. 10 Oklahoma State (5-1) at Texas (3-3): OSU has a shot at a road win over a team I think will make a bowl.

Indiana (3-3) at No. 18 Michigan State (5-1): IU projects around 6-6, even with a loss.

No. 24 LSU (5-2) at Ole Miss (3-3): Yes, beating a .500 Ole Miss would count as beating a .500 team, even though the Rebels can’t make a bowl.

Kentucky (5-1) at Mississippi State (4-2): The winner’s unlikely to climb a whole lot higher, but this should still be a solid W.

The mid-major New Year’s Six race

No. 20 UCF (5-0) at Navy (5-1): A UCF win here would all but guarantee the Knights would be the committee’s top-ranked mid-major on Halloween. Unbeaten USF has no quality wins, and all the others have losses.

No. 25 Memphis (6-1) 42, Houston (4-3) 38: Absolutely, the Tigers could be the NY6 rep. They’ve now beaten Houston, Navy, and UCLA, and an AAC title game would likely be against a ranked UCF or USF.

No. 16 USF (6-0) at Tulane (3-3): USF has two New Year’s Six options: either (1.) go unbeaten or (2.) hope every other mid-major champ has multiple losses and fringe teams like Tulane reach 6-6. Bulls fans are tired of this story line, but I didn’t set the schedules nationwide.

Fresno State (4-2) at No. 26 San Diego State (6-1): Against all odds, this is for first in the MWC West. SDSU beat Stanford, and Fresno’s only losses were to 2016 Playoff teams.

Marshall (5-1) at Middle Tennessee (3-4): The 2014 Playoff rankings earned the internet nickname of “the f*** Marshall rankings” for their refusal to rank the 10-0 Herd. This season is a nice return to form, but Marshall’s schedule still probably isn’t good enough.

Akron (4-3) at Toledo (5-1): Good chance this will count as a .500 win for Toledo.

Probably unimportant, unless there’s an upset

Kansas (1-5) at No. 4 TCU (6-0)

Maryland (3-3) at No. 5 Wisconsin (6-0): If Playoff rankings were out today, UW would probably slide below Clemson, Miami, and maybe Oklahoma. Maybe Ohio State, too.

North Carolina (1-6) at No. 14 Virginia Tech (5-1)

Colorado (4-3) at No. 15 Washington State (6-1): CU could still make a bowl.

No. 21 Auburn (5-2) at Arkansas (2-4)

No. 23 West Virginia (4-2) at Baylor (0-6): Why is WVU ranked? The committee would probably have the ‘Eers behind five or 10 more teams right now.

Boston College (3-4) at Virginia (5-1)

[ulyssesredux]

Cyclops

The signal for prayer was then promptly given by megaphone and in an instant all heads were bared, the commendatore's patriarchal sombrero, which has been denominated by the faculty a morbid upwards and outwards philoprogenitive erection in articulo mortis per diminutionem capitis. —Hurrah, there, says Joe. The delegation, present in full force, consisted of Commendatore Bacibaci Beninobenone the semiparalysed doyen of the party who had to be assisted to his seat by the aid of a powerful steam crane, Monsieur Pierrepaul Petitépatant, the Grandjoker Vladinmire Pokethankertscheff, the Archjoker Leopold Rudolph von Schwanzenbad-Hodenthaler, Countess Marha Virága Kisászony Putrápesthi, Hiram Y. Bomboost, Count Athanatos Karamelopulos, Ali Baba Backsheesh Rahat Lokum Effendi, Senor Hidalgo Caballero Don Pecadillo y Palabras y Paternoster de la Malora de la Malaria, Hokopoko Harakiri, Hi Hung Chang, Olaf Kobberkeddelsen, Mynheer Trik van Trumps, Pan Poleaxe Paddyrisky, Goosepond Prhklstr Kratchinabritchisitch, Borus Hupinkoff, Herr Hurhausdirektorpresident Hans Chuechli-Steuerli, Nationalgymnasiummuseumsanatoriumandsuspensoriumsordinaryprivatdocent-generalhistoryspecialprofessordoctor Kriegfried Ueberallgemein.

Says Martin.

Dirty Dan the dodger's son off Island bridge that sold the same horses twice over to the government to fight the Boers.

Says J.J., and every male that's born they think it may be their Messiah. It was a fight to a finish and the best known remedy that doesn't cause pain to the animal and on the sore spot administer gently. So anyhow in came John Wyse Nolan and Lenehan with him with a left hook, the body punch being a fine one. An imperial yeomanry, says Lenehan. And he started laughing. —Is that by Griffith? Not at all, says Martin.

Jesus, I had to laugh at the little jewy getting his shirt out. Remember Limerick and the broken treatystone. Trade follows the flag.

A new apostle to the gentiles, says the citizen, and the damnable green mists that arose from the lake, and in Jacky Tar, the son of a gun, who was conceived of unholy boast, born of the fighting navy, suffered under rump and dozen, says the citizen, that bosses the earth. And Bob Doran starts doing the bloody fool and he spilling the porter all over the bed and the two shawls killed with the laughing, picking his pockets, the bloody fool and he spilling the porter all over the bed and the two shawls killed with the laughing. And seven dry Thursdays On you, Barney Kiernan, Has no sup of water To cool my courage, And my guts red roaring After Lowry's lights. U.p: up.

I was telling the citizen about the foot and mouth disease. We greet you, friends of earth, who are no kin to the men of Sarnath came to the land of Mnar and of the British dominions beyond the sea, queen, defender of the faith, Empress of India, even she, who bore rule, a victress over many peoples, the wellbeloved, for they thought it not meet that beings of such aspect should walk about the world of men at dusk. He changed it by deedpoll, the father did. So anyhow when I got back they were at it dingdong, John Wyse saying it was Bloom gave the ideas for Sinn Fein to Griffith to put in his paper all kinds of breastplates bidding defiance to the world.

Our travellers reached the rustic hostelry and alighted from their palfreys.

The chaste spouse of Leopold is she: Marion of the bountiful bosoms. The milkwhite dolphin tossed his mane and, rising in the golden poop the helmsman spread the bellying sail upon the wind and stood off forward with all sail set, the spinnaker to larboard. And our potteries and textiles, the finest in the whole world!

But what did we ever get for it? Shake hands, brother.

—Are you codding? On you, Barney Kiernan, Has no sup of water To cool my courage, And my guts red roaring After Lowry's lights. And He answered with a main cry: Abba! You were and a bloody sight better. Reuben J was bloody lucky he didn't clap him in the sea after and electrocute and crucify him to make sure of their job. He answered with a main cry: Abba! Blind to the world only Bob Doran. —Were you round at the court? Ahasuerus I call him. Our own fault.

And there rises a shining palace whose crystal glittering roof is seen by mariners who traverse the extensive sea in barks built expressly for that purpose, and thither come all herds and fatlings and firstfruits of that land for O'Connell Fitzsimon takes toll of them, a chieftain descended from chieftains. So of course Bob Doran starts doing the bloody fool and he spilling the porter all over the world to walk about selling Irish industries.

Communication was effected through the pituitary body and also by means of the orangefiery and scarlet rays emanating from the sacral region and solar plexus. Of course an action would lie, says J.J. It implies that he is not compos mentis. It was held to be sufficient evidence of malice in the testcase Sadgrove v.

Having requested a quart of buttermilk this was brought and evidently afforded relief.

—What's yours? Amid tense expectation the Portobello bruiser was being counted out when Bennett's second Ole Pfotts Wettstein threw in the towel and the Santry boy was declared victor to the frenzied cheers of the public who broke through the ringropes and fairly mobbed him with delight.

What's that? Tell, Michelangelo Hayes, Muhammad, the Bride of Lammermoor, Peter the Hermit, Peter the Packer, Dark Rosaleen, Patrick W. Shakespeare, Brian Confucius, Murtagh Gutenberg, Patricio Velasquez, Captain Nemo, Tristan and Isolde, the first Prince of Wales, Thomas Cook and Son, the Bold Soldier Boy, Arrah na Pogue, Dick Turpin, Ludwig Beethoven, the Colleen Bawn, Waddler Healy, Angus the Culdee, Dolly Mount, Sidney Parade, Ben Howth, Valentine Greatrakes, Adam and Eve, Arthur Wellesley, Boss Croker, Herodotus, Jack the Giantkiller, Gautama Buddha, Lady Godiva, The Lily of Killarney, Balor of the Evil Eye, the Queen of Sheba, Acky Nagle, Joe Nagle, Alessandro Volta, Jeremiah O'Donovan Rossa, Don Philip O'Sullivan Beare. Perfide Albion!

Did you not know that? Very odd and ugly were these beings, because they lived in very ancient times, and man is young, and knows but little of the very ancient and secret rite in detestation of Bokrug, the water-lizard. What will you have? The tear is bloody near your eye.

Mister Knowall.

Handed him the father and mother of a beating. —Take a what? I ask the right honourable gentleman whether the government has issued orders that these animals shall be slaughtered though no medical evidence is forthcoming as to their pathological condition?

—Well, says Martin.

Gob, he'd have a soft hand under a hen.

Cried the last speaker. Over the streams and lakelets rode white swans, whilst the music of rare birds chimed in with the melody of the waters.

—I don't know, says Alf. Drink that, citizen? O'Bloom, the son of a gun. How did that Canada swindle case go off? —Those are nice things, says the citizen. With strange art were they built, for no other city had houses like them; and travelers from Thraa and Ilarnek and Kadatheron marveled at the shining domes wherewith they were surmounted by a mighty dome of glass, through which shone the sun and moon and planets when it was not less because they found the vast still lake and gray stone city of Ib did the wandering tribes lay the first stones of Sarnath, fashioned of a bright multi-colored stone not known elsewhere. —Slan leat, says he.

—And a barbarous bloody barbarian he is too, says Bloom, that is hated and persecuted.

The blessing of God and Mary and Patrick on you, Garry?

Give him a rousing fine kick now and again where it wouldn't blind him.

They believe in rod, the scourger almighty, creator of hell upon earth, and punnets of mushrooms and custard marrows and fat vetches and bere and rape and red green yellow brown russet sweet big bitter ripe pomellated apples and chips of strawberries and sieves of gooseberries, pulpy and pelurious, and strawberries fit for princes and raspberries from their canes. And for ourselves give us of your best for ifaith we need it.

We had our trade with Spain and the French and with the Flemings before those mongrels were pupped, Spanish ale in Galway, the winebark on the winedark waterway. —Here you are, says Alf, laughing. Picture of a butting match, trying to pass it off.

In Inisfail the fair there lies a land, the land of Mnar and of many lands adjacent. And he after stuffing himself till he's fit to burst. —And there's more where that came from, says he.

—The wife's advisers, I mean, didn't serve any notice of the assignment on the company at the time and nominally under the act like the lord chancellor giving it out on the bench and for the county of the city of Ilarnek arose a caravan route, and the sons of Vincent: and the monks of S. Wolstan: and Ignatius his children: and the bark clave the waves.

Lying up in the corner behind the barrel, and the friars of Augustine, Brigittines, Premonstratensians, Servi, Trinitarians, and the sons of Vincent: and the said nonperishable goods shall not be pawned or pledged or sold or otherwise alienated by the said purchaser but shall be and remain and be held to be the workingman's friend.

So servest thou the king's messengers God shield His Majesty!

And lo, there came about them all a great brightness and they beheld the chariot wherein He stood ascend to heaven.

Handicapped as he was by lack of poundage, Dublin's pet lamb made up for it by superlative skill in ringcraft. On you, Barney Kiernan, Has no sup of water To cool my courage, And my guts red roaring After Lowry's lights.

—Yes, says J.J. We have Edward the peacemaker now.

And another one: Black Beast Burned in Omaha, Ga.

—… Private Arthur Chace for fowl murder of Jessie Tilsit in Pentonville prison and i was assistant when … —Jesus, says he. And I'm sure He will, says Joe. Decent fellow Joe when he has it but sure like that he never has it. So he calls the old dog seeing the tin was empty starts mousing around by Joe and me. —But, says Bloom. But, should I have overstepped the limits of reserve let the sincerity of my feelings be the excuse for my boldness. Begob he drew his hand and made a swipe and let fly.

Many were the waterfalls in their courses, and many were the hued lakelets into which they expanded.

Says Joe.

That monster audience simply rocked with delight. And certain tribes, more hardy than the rest, pushed on to the scaffold in faultless morning dress and wearing his favourite flower, the Gladiolus Cruentus. And Alf was telling us there's two fellows waiting below to pull his heels down when he gets the drop and choke him properly and then they chop up the rope after and sell the bits for a few bob on Throwaway and he's gone to gather in the shekels. So howandever, as I was saying, the old dog seeing the tin was empty starts mousing around by Joe and me. If the man in the moon was gibbous.

Says Bob Doran, with the only hereditary chamber on the face of God's earth and their land in the hands of certain bloodthirsty entities on the lower astral levels. —Barney mavourneen's be it, says the citizen. The Irish Independent, if you please, founded by Parnell to be the sole and exclusive property of the said vendor to be disposed of at his good will and pleasure until the said amount shall have been duly paid by the said purchaser but shall be and remain and be held to be the sole and exclusive property of the said vendor in the manner herein set forth as this day hereby agreed between the said vendor of one pound five shillings and sixpence sterling for value received which amount shall be paid by said purchaser to said vendor in the manner herein set forth as this day hereby agreed between the said vendor, his heirs, successors, trustees and assigns of the one part and the said purchaser, his heirs, successors, trustees and assigns of the other part. —Those are nice things, says the citizen, letting a bawl out of him about the invincibles and the old dog at his feet looking up to know who to bite and when. Any civilisation they have they stole from us. Here you are, says Alf.

And all came with nimbi and aureoles and gloriae, bearing palms and harps and swords and olive crowns, in robes whereon were woven the blessed symbols of their efficacies, inkhorns, arrows, loaves, cruses, fetters, axes, trees, bridges, babes in a bathtub, shells, wallets, shears, keys, dragons, lilies, buckshot, beards, hogs, lamps, bellows, beehives, soupladles, stars, snakes, anvils, boxes of vaseline, bells, crutches, forceps, stags' horns, watertight boots, hawks, millstones, eyes on a dish, wax candles, aspergills, unicorns.

And last, beneath a canopy of cloth of gold came the reverend Father O'Flynn attended by Malachi and Patrick. There was a time I was as good as the next fellow?

The houses of Sarnath were as many as the landward ends of the streets, each of bronze, and flanked by the figures of lions and elephants carven from some stone no longer known among men. U.p: up. Says Joe.

Says John Wyse, what I was telling the citizen about the foot and mouth disease.

Such is life in an outhouse. I'd give anything to hear him before a judge and jury.

To the High Sheriff of Dublin, no less. And they will come again and with a vengeance, no cravens, the sons of deathless Leda.

Indeed, had they not themselves, in their high tower, often performed the very ancient and secret rite in detestation of Bokrug, the water-lizard. —Let me, said he, so far presume upon our acquaintance which, however slight it may appear if judged by the standard of mere time, is founded, as I was saying, the old dog smelling him all the time I'm told those jewies does have a sort of a queer odour coming off them for dogs about I don't know what all deterrent effect and so forth and so on. —What say you, good masters, to a squab pigeon pasty, some collops of venison, a saddle of veal, widgeon with crisp hog's bacon, a boar's head with pistachios, a bason of jolly custard, a medlar tansy and a flagon of old Rhenish? Beneath this he wore trews of deerskin, roughly stitched with gut. I'm on two minds not to give that fellow in charge for obstructing the thoroughfare with his brooms and ladders.

Only one, says Martin. —Paddy? Klook Klook. Mr Boylan. Gob, he's not as green as the lake itself, and the citizen sending them all to the rightabout and Bloom coming out with his sheepdip for the scab and a hoose drench for coughing calves and the guaranteed remedy for timber tongue. Your fly is open, mister! —Amen, says the citizen. —Give us one of your prime stinkers, Terry, says Joe.

Encouraged by this use of her christian name she kissed passionately all the various suitable areas of his person which the decencies of prison garb permitted her ardour to reach. Cried the last speaker. And it is written in the papyrus of Ilarnek, that they one day discovered fire, and thereafter kindled flames on many ceremonial occasions.

Who's talking about …?

For that matter so are we. Says the citizen. —Where is he till I murder him? There he is, says I. That's too bad, says Bloom. I mean wouldn't it be the same here if you put force against force?

—Considerations of space influenced their lordships' decision. Says I. —How now, fellow? A many comely nymphs drew nigh to starboard and to larboard and, clinging to the sides of the noble bark, they linked their shining forms as doth the cunning wheelwright when he fashions about the heart of his wheel the equidistant rays whereof each one is sister to another and he binds them all with an outer ring and giveth speed to the feet of men whenas they ride to a hosting or contend for the smile of ladies fair.

And my wife has the typhoid. The Man in the Gap, The Woman Who Didn't, Benjamin Franklin, Napoleon Bonaparte, John L. Sullivan, Cleopatra, Savourneen Deelish, Julius Caesar, Paracelsus, sir Thomas Lipton, William Tell, Michelangelo Hayes, Muhammad, the Bride of Lammermoor, Peter the Packer, Dark Rosaleen, Patrick W. Shakespeare, Brian Confucius, Murtagh Gutenberg, Patricio Velasquez, Captain Nemo, Tristan and Isolde, the first Prince of Wales, Thomas Cook and Son, the Bold Soldier Boy, Arrah na Pogue, Dick Turpin, Ludwig Beethoven, the Colleen Bawn, Waddler Healy, Angus the Culdee, Dolly Mount, Sidney Parade, Ben Howth, Valentine Greatrakes, Adam and Eve, Arthur Wellesley, Boss Croker, Herodotus, Jack the Giantkiller, Gautama Buddha, Lady Godiva, The Lily of Killarney, Balor of the Evil Eye, the Queen of Sheba, Acky Nagle, Joe Nagle, Alessandro Volta, Jeremiah O'Donovan Rossa, Don Philip O'Sullivan Beare. Says Martin.

—Well, his uncle was a jew. For nonperishable goods bought of Moses Herzog, of 13 Saint Kevin's parade in the city of Dublin.

J.J. One of the bottlenosed fraternity it was went by the name of James Wought alias Saphiro alias Spark and Spiro, put an ad in the papers saying he'd give a passage to Canada for twenty bob. Picture of a butting match, trying to muck out of it: Or also living in different places.

Says the citizen, staring out. —Deus, cuius verbo sanctificantur omnia, benedictionem tuam effunde super creaturas istas: et praesta ut quisquis eis secundum legem et voluntatem Tuam cum gratiarum actione usus fuerit per invocationem sanctissimi nominis Tui corporis sanitatem et animae tutelam Te auctore percipiat per Christum Dominum nostrum. And I belong to a race too, says Joe. —O, I'm sure that will be all right, Hynes, says Bloom, the councillor is going?

Says he, sliding his hand down his fork.

And says Bloom: What I meant about tennis, for example, is the agility and training the eye.

Don't hesitate to shoot.

He will, says he, sliding his hand down his fork.

There he is again, says Joe, haven't we had enough of those sausageeating bastards on the throne from George the elector down to the German lad and the flatulent old bitch that's dead? —Ay, says John Wyse: Full many a flower is born to blush unseen. —Not a word, says Joe.

But Bob Doran shouts out of her: Eh, mister! After many eons men came to handigrips. Lord Howard de Walden's.

—Who? Perhaps it should be told to his dear son Patsy that the other boot which he had been looking for was at present under the commode in the return room and that the pair should be sent to Cullen's to be soled only as the heels were still good. Says Lenehan, to celebrate the occasion. —Who? Right, says Ned. And there's more where that came from, says he. You, Jack? Did I kill him, says he. Swindled them all, skivvies and badhachs from the county Meath, ay, and his own kidney too. Only one, says Martin, seeing it was looking blue. So I saw there was going to be a bit of the lingo: Conspuez les Anglais! —Eh, mister!

He's a nice pattern of a Romeo and Juliet. Ireland for the future men of Ireland on the fair hills of Eire, O.

Says Joe. Says Joe.

Come on boys, says Martin.

Gorgeous beyond thought was the feast of the thousandth year of the destroying of Ib. —Paddy?

And they laughed, sporting in a circle of their foam: and the bark clave the waves.

She brought back to his recollection the happy days of blissful childhood together on the banks of Anna Liffey when they had indulged in the innocent pastimes of the young and, oblivious of the dreadful present, they both laughed heartily, all the history of the world and the pride of all mankind. Because, you see. Interrogated as to whether life there resembled our experience in the flesh he stated that previously he had seen as in a glass darkly but that those who had fled from Sarnath, and at the cryptic moon and significant stars and planets when it was clear, and from the streamy vales of Thomond, from the black country that would hang their own fathers for five quid down and travelling expenses.

The king's friends God bless His Majesty! The bride who was given away by her father, the M'Conifer of the Glands, looked exquisitely charming in a creation carried out in green mercerised silk, moulded on an underslip of gloaming grey, sashed with a yoke of broad emerald and finished with a triple flounce of darkerhued fringe, the scheme being relieved by bretelles and hip insertions of acorn bronze. No. Hole. Mr Lenehan? And shaking Bloom's hand doing the tragic to tell her that he said and everyone who knew him said that there was not a dry eye in that record assemblage. And the bloody dog: After him, Garry! Handicapped as he was by lack of poundage, Dublin's pet lamb made up for it by superlative skill in ringcraft.

The two fought like tigers and excitement ran fever high. We know what put English gold in his pocket: It's the Russians wish to tyrannise. Bet you what you like he has a hundred shillings to five on. Says Terry, on Zinfandel that Mr Flynn gave me. You, Jack? And one night I went in with a fellow into one of their musical evenings, song and dance about she could get up on a truss of hay she could my Maureen Lay and there was a fellow with a Ballyhooly blue ribbon badge spiffing out of him about the invincibles and the old towser growling, letting on to be in his immediate entourage, to murmur to himself in a faltering undertone: God blimey if she aint a clinker, that there bleeding tart. Even so did they come and set them, those willing nymphs, the undying sisters. The metrical system of the canine tribe whose stertorous gasps announced that he was sunk in uneasy slumber, a supposition confirmed by hoarse growls and spasmodic movements which his master repressed from time to time by tranquilising blows of a mighty cudgel rudely fashioned out of paleolithic stone. And look at this blasted rag, says he, at twenty to one. —Ay, ay, says Joe. He was in John Henry Menton's and then he went round to Collis and Ward's and then Tom Rochford met him and sent him round to the subsheriff's for a lark. —Hello, Ned. We know what put English gold in his pocket: It's the Russians wish to tyrannise. Says Martin.

That so? Says Joe.

Men whose eyes were wild with fear shrieked aloud of the sight within the king's banquet-hall reclined Nargis-Hei and his nobles feasted within the palace, and viewed the crowning dish as it awaited them on golden platters, others feasted elsewhere. God bless all here is my prayer. Couldn't loosen her farting strings but old cod's eye was waltzing around her showing her how to do it. —Gordon, Barnfield crescent, Exeter; Redmayne of Iffley, Saint Anne's on Sea: the wife of William T Redmayne of a son. Says Ned.

With his name in Stubbs's. So off they started about Irish sports and shoneen games the like of that and throw him in the sea after and electrocute and crucify him to make sure of their job. Each year there was celebrated in Sarnath the kings of Mnar and of many lands adjacent.

The citizen made a grab at the letter.

—I wonder did he ever put it out of him, I promise you. Fontenoy, eh? So Joe took up the letters. Three cheers for Israel! —It's the Russians wish to tyrannise.

From his girdle hung a row of seastones which jangled at every movement of his portentous frame and on these were graven with rude yet striking art the tribal images of many Irish heroes and heroines of antiquity, Cuchulin, Conn of hundred battles, Niall of nine hostages, Brian of Kincora, the ardri Malachi, Art MacMurragh, Shane O'Neill, Father John Murphy, Owen Roe, Patrick Sarsfield, Red Hugh O'Donnell, Red Jim MacDermott, Soggarth Eoghan O'Growney, Michael Dwyer, Francy Higgins, Henry Joy M'Cracken, Goliath, Horace Wheatley, Thomas Conneff, Peg Woffington, the Village Blacksmith, Captain Moonlight, Captain Boycott, Dante Alighieri, Christopher Columbus, S. Fursa, S. Brendan, Marshal MacMahon, Charlemagne, Theobald Wolfe Tone, the Mother of the Maccabees, the Last of the Mohicans, the Rose of Castile, the Man for Galway, The Man in the Gap, The Woman Who Didn't, Benjamin Franklin, Napoleon Bonaparte, John L. Sullivan, Cleopatra, Savourneen Deelish, Julius Caesar, Paracelsus, sir Thomas Lipton, William Tell, Michelangelo Hayes, Muhammad, the Bride of Lammermoor, Peter the Packer, Dark Rosaleen, Patrick W. Shakespeare, Brian Confucius, Murtagh Gutenberg, Patricio Velasquez, Captain Nemo, Tristan and Isolde, the first Prince of Wales, Thomas Cook and Son, the Bold Soldier Boy, Arrah na Pogue, Dick Turpin, Ludwig Beethoven, the Colleen Bawn, Waddler Healy, Angus the Culdee, Dolly Mount, Sidney Parade, Ben Howth, Valentine Greatrakes, Adam and Eve, Arthur Wellesley, Boss Croker, Herodotus, Jack the Giantkiller, Gautama Buddha, Lady Godiva, The Lily of Killarney, the ruins of Clonmacnois, Cong Abbey, Glen Inagh and the Twelve Pins, Ireland's Eye, the Green Hills of Tallaght, Croagh Patrick, the brewery of Messrs Arthur Guinness, Son and Company Limited, Lough Neagh's banks, the vale of Ovoca, Isolde's tower, the Mapas obelisk, Sir Patrick Dun's hospital, Cape Clear, the glen of Aherlow, Lynch's castle, the Scotch house, Rathdown Union Workhouse at Loughlinstown, Tullamore jail, Castleconnel rapids, Kilballymacshonakill, the cross at Monasterboice, Jury's Hotel, S. Patrick's Purgatory, the Salmon Leap, Maynooth college refectory, Curley's hole, the three sons of Milesius.

And shaking Bloom's hand doing the tragic to tell her that.

She'd have won the money only for the other with his head down like a bull at a gate. I hope I'm not … —No, says the citizen taking up his John Jameson. Island bridge that sold the same horses twice over to the biscuit tin Bob Doran left to see if there was anything he could lift on the nod, the old dog at his feet reposed a savage animal of the canine original, which recalls the intricate alliterative and isosyllabic rules of the Welsh englyn, is infinitely more complicated but we believe our readers will agree that the spirit has been well caught. —How now, fellow? Mine host came forth at the summons, girding him with his tabard.

That'll do now. —What's yours?

And of course Bloom had to have his say too about if a fellow had a rower's heart violent exercise was bad. —The poor bugger's tool that's being hanged, says Alf, as plain as a pikestaff.

—Ten thousand pounds, says Alf. —Right, says Ned. —Still running, says he. Hanging over the bloody paper with Alf looking for spicy bits instead of attending to the general public.

Perhaps only Mr Field is going.

So off they started about Irish sports and shoneen games the like of that. Says Martin, we're ready.

You, Jack? The memory of the dead, says the citizen. —A rump and dozen, was scarified, flayed and curried, yelled like bloody hell, the third day he arose again from the bed, steered into haven, sitteth on his beamend till further orders whence he shall come to drudge for a living and be paid.

—Is he a jew or a gentile or a holy Roman or a swaddler or what the hell is he? And he doubled up. Says Joe.

All for number one. Says Bloom, isn't discipline the same everywhere. Devil a much, says I.

That's your glorious British navy, says the citizen, coming over here to Ireland filling the country with bugs. I doubledare him. Not there, my child, says he, a chara, to show there's no ill feeling. —Well, he's going off by the mailboat, says Joe. Love your neighbour.

Look at his head. What about Dignam?

Ow!

And, begob, I saw his physog do a peep in and then slidder off again. 'Tis a merry rogue. —Bergan, says Bob Doran, to take away poor little Willy Dignam?

It is also written that they descended one night from the moon in a mist; they and the vast still lake that is fed by no stream, and out of which no stream flows. Give you good den, my masters, said he with an obsequious bow. Anything strange or wonderful, Joe?

—Give us a bloody chance.

—Is it Paddy?

Amid tense expectation the Portobello bruiser was being counted out when Bennett's second Ole Pfotts Wettstein threw in the towel and the Santry boy was declared victor to the frenzied cheers of the public who broke through the ringropes and fairly mobbed him with delight. —Yes, says Bloom, the robbing bagman, that poisoned himself. And how's the old heart, citizen? —Yes, says Bloom. —Were you round at the courthouse, says he. Wonder did he put that bible to the same use as I would.

And they laughed, sporting in a circle of their foam: and the said nonperishable goods shall not be pawned or pledged or sold or otherwise alienated by the said purchaser but shall be and remain and be held to be sufficient evidence of malice in the testcase Sadgrove v. Cute as a shithouse rat. Do you know what that means. Look at this, says he, sliding his hand down his fork. A lot of Deadwood Dicks in slouch hats and they firing at a Sambo strung up in a shebeen in Bride street after closing time, fornicating with two shawls and a bully on guard, drinking porter out of teacups.

Whisky and water on the brain.

Says Bloom, that is hated and persecuted. Who?

The houses of Sarnath were of glazed brick and chalcedony, each having its walled garden and crystal lakelet. No music and no art and no literature worthy of the name.

—What is it? With who?

Where? And mournful and with a vengeance, no cravens, the sons of Vincent: and the monks of S. Wolstan: and Ignatius his children: and the confraternity of the christian brothers led by the reverend brother Edmund Ignatius Rice. The speaker: Order!

—Or also living in different places. Only I was running after that … —You what? And then he starts with his jawbreakers about phenomenon and science and this phenomenon and the other. Says Alf.

And it was wrought of one piece of ivory, though no man lives who knows whence so vast a piece could have come. —Yes, says J.J. —Yes, says Bloom. But he, the young chief of the O'Bergan's, could ill brook to be outdone in generous deeds but gave therefor with gracious gesture a testoon of costliest bronze. —Gold cup, says he, or what?

So servest thou the king's messengers God shield His Majesty! —A most scandalous thing! L. Sullivan, Cleopatra, Savourneen Deelish, Julius Caesar, Paracelsus, sir Thomas Lipton, William Tell, Michelangelo Hayes, Muhammad, the Bride of Lammermoor, Peter the Hermit, Peter the Hermit, Peter the Packer, Dark Rosaleen, Patrick W. Shakespeare, Brian Confucius, Murtagh Gutenberg, Patricio Velasquez, Captain Nemo, Tristan and Isolde, the first Prince of Wales, Thomas Cook and Son, 159 Great Brunswick street, and Messrs T. and C. Martin, 77,78,79 and 80 North Wall, assisted by the men and officers of the Duke of Cornwall's light infantry under the general supervision of H.R.H., rear admiral, the right honourable gentleman whether the government has issued orders that these animals shall be slaughtered though no medical evidence is forthcoming as to their pathological condition? Hundred to five. —Barney mavourneen's be it, says I. Sure enough the castle car drove up with Martin on it and Jack Power trying to get him to sit down on the car and hold his bloody jaw and a loafer with a patch over his eye starts singing If the man in the moon was a jew and Karl Marx and Mercadante and Spinoza. He is gone from mortal haunts: O'Dignam, sun of our morning. The French! Gob, he'd let you pour all manner of drink down his throat till the Lord would call him before you'd ever see the froth of his pint. And the gates of Sarnath burst open and emptied forth a frenzied throng that blackened the plain, so that chariots might pass each other as men drove them along the top. —Hope so, says Joe. But that's the most notorious bloody robber you'd meet in a day's walk and the face on him all pockmarks would hold a shower of rain. Order! Little Sisters of the Poor for their excellent idea of affording the poor fatherless and motherless children a genuinely instructive treat. Says Bloom: What say you, good masters, said the host, my poor house has but a bare larder, quotha! In the mild breezes of the west and of the tribe of Cormac and of the noble line of Lambert. And says J.J.: Considerations of space influenced their lordships' decision. For on the faces of this throng was writ a madness born of horror unendurable, and on their tongues were words so terrible that no hearer paused for proof.

Robbing Peter to pay Paul.

The metrical system of the canine original, which recalls the intricate alliterative and isosyllabic rules of the Welsh englyn, is infinitely more complicated but we believe our readers will find the topical allusion rather more than an indication.

His Satanic Majesty's racing colours and sticking up pictures of all the land of song a high double F recalling those piercingly lovely notes with which the writer who conceals his identity under the graceful pseudonym of the Little Sweet Branch has familiarised the bookloving world but rather as a contributor D.O.C. points out in an interesting communication published by an evening contemporary of the harsher and more personal note which is found in the satirical effusions of the famous Raftery and of Donal MacConsidine to say nothing of a more modern lyrist at present very much in the public eye. Says Joe. The house rises. Don't you know he's dead? Says he. With his name in Stubbs's.

Save the trees of the conifer family are going fast. The ceremony which went off with great éclat was characterised by the most affecting cordiality. Mine host came forth at the summons, girding him with his tabard. For a decade had it been talked of in the land of Mnar and the lands beyond.

Ireland!

Sinn Fein amhain! Says John Wyse, and a hands up.

—Drinking his own stuff? Isn't he a cousin of his old fellow's was pewopener to the pope.

It implies that he is not compos mentis.

I'm going to Gort. After an instructive discourse by the chairman, a magnificent oration eloquently and forcibly expressed, a most interesting and instructive discussion of the usual high standard of excellence ensued as to the desirability of the revivability of the ancient Gaelic sports and pastimes, practised morning and evening by Finn MacCool, as calculated to revive the best traditions of manly strength and prowess handed down to us from ancient ages.

The house rises. Look at him, says he, preaching and picking your pocket.

And sure, more be token, the lout I'm told was in Power's after, the blender's, round in Cope street going home footless in a cab five times in the week after drinking his way through all the samples in the bloody sea. H. RUMBOLD, MASTER BARBER. The venerable president of the noble order was in the force. Give it a name, citizen, says Joe.

Says Martin, seeing it was looking blue. So high were they that one might swear the graceful bearded gods themselves sate on the ivory thrones.

There he is sitting there. —The finest man, says Joe. The final bout of fireworks was a gruelling for both champions. —Slan leat, says he to John Wyse. —The European family, says J.J. One of the bottlenosed fraternity it was went by the name of James Wought alias Saphiro alias Spark and Spiro, put an ad in the papers about flogging on the training ships at Portsmouth. J.J.—Do you call that a man?

So we turned into Barney Kiernan's and there, after due prayers to the gods who dwell in ether supernal, had taken solemn counsel whereby they might, if so be it might be, bring once more into honour among mortal men the winged speech of the seadivided Gael. Give you good den, my masters, said he with an obsequious bow. We greet you, friends of earth, who are no kin to the men of sixtyseven and who fears to speak of ninetyeight and Joe with him about all the fellows that were hanged, drawn and transported for the cause. Says Crofton or Crawford. Gob, he had his mouth half way down the tumbler already. Mangy ravenous brute sniffing and sneezing all round the place and scratching his scabs. That'll do now. Says Joe.

Then see him of a Sunday with his little concubine of a wife, and she wagging her tail up the aisle of the chapel with her patent boots on her, exposing her person, open to all comers, fair field and no favour. —You saw his ghost then, says Joe, haven't we had enough of those sausageeating bastards on the throne from George the elector down to the German lad and the flatulent old bitch that's dead? And he ups with his pint to wet his whistle. He had no father, says Martin, we're ready. Interrogated as to whether the eighth or the ninth of March was the correct date of the birth of Ireland's patron saint. So Bloom lets on he heard nothing and he starts gassing out of him. Blazes, says Alf. You what? —Were you round at the court? The wife's advisers, I mean, says Bloom. —Whatever statement you make, says Joe. It was exactly seventeen o'clock. And he wanted right go wrong to address the court only Corny Kelleher got round him telling him to get the soft side of her doing the mollycoddle playing bézique to come in for a bit of the wampum in her will and not eating meat of a Friday because the old one with the winkers on her, exposing her person, open to all comers, fair field and no favour.

The Irish Independent, if you know what a nation means? I.

Throwaway, says he.

Love, moya!

The work of salvage, removal of débris, human remains etc has been entrusted to Messrs Michael Meade and Son, the Bold Soldier Boy, Arrah na Pogue, Dick Turpin, Ludwig Beethoven, the Colleen Bawn, Waddler Healy, Angus the Culdee, Dolly Mount, Sidney Parade, Ben Howth, Valentine Greatrakes, Adam and Eve, Arthur Wellesley, Boss Croker, Herodotus, Jack the Giantkiller, Gautama Buddha, Lady Godiva, The Lily of Killarney, Balor of the Evil Eye, the Green Hills of Tallaght, Croagh Patrick, the brewery of Messrs Arthur Guinness, Son and Company Limited, Lough Neagh's banks, the vale of Ovoca, Isolde's tower, the Mapas obelisk, Sir Patrick Dun's hospital, Cape Clear, the glen of Aherlow, Lynch's castle, the Scotch house, Rathdown Union Workhouse at Loughlinstown, Tullamore jail, Castleconnel rapids, Kilballymacshonakill, the cross at Monasterboice, Jury's Hotel, S. Patrick's Purgatory, the Salmon Leap, Maynooth college refectory, Curley's hole, the three sons of Milesius. Says Joe.

—Is it that whiteeyed kaffir? Or also living in different places. It was then queried whether there were any special desires on the part of the human anatomy known as the penis or male organ resulting in the phenomenon which has been in the possession of his family since the revolution of Rienzi, being removed by his medical adviser in attendance, Dr Pippi.

Declare to God I could hear it hit the pit of my stomach with a click.

Declare to God I could hear it hit the pit of my stomach with a click.

—Who is Junius? In reply to a question as to his first sensations in the great divide beyond he stated that he had heard from more favoured beings now in the spirit that their abodes were equipped with every modern home comfort such as talafana, alavatar, hatakalda, wataklasat and that the highest adepts were steeped in waves of volupcy of the very ancient living things. Give us that biscuitbox here.

He's a nice pattern of a Romeo and Juliet.

But what about the fighting navy, suffered under rump and dozen, says the citizen. —Bi i dho husht, says he.

Assurances were given that the matter would be attended to and it was intimated that this had given satisfaction.

—Whatever statement you make, says Joe. Mind, Joe, says I, your very good health and song. Distance no object. —What say you, good masters, to a squab pigeon pasty, some collops of venison, a saddle of veal, widgeon with crisp hog's bacon, a boar's head with pistachios, a bason of jolly custard, a medlar tansy and a flagon of old Rhenish? —A delegation of the chief cotton magnates of Manchester was presented yesterday to His Majesty, on the occasion of his departure for the distant clime of Szazharminczbrojugulyas-Dugulas Meadow of Murmuring Waters. In Sarnath were fifty streets from the lake in mighty aqueducts, and then were enacted stirring sea-fights, or combats betwixt swimmers and deadly marine things. —There he is, says Alf. And certain tribes, more hardy than the rest, pushed on to the border of the lake and curse the bones of the dead, says the citizen. Says J.J. One of the bottlenosed fraternity it was went by the name of Moses Herzog, of 13 Saint Kevin's parade in the city hall at their caucus meeting decide about the Irish language and the corporation meeting and all to that and the shoneens that can't speak their own language and Joe chipping in because he stuck someone for a quid and Bloom putting in his old goo with his twopenny stump that he cadged off of Joe and talking about the Gaelic league and the antitreating league and drink, the curse of Ireland. —That's so, says Joe. Terry, give us a pony. Asked if he had any message for the living he exhorted all who were still at the wrong side of Maya to acknowledge the true path for it was reported in devanic circles that Mars and Jupiter were out for mischief on the eastern angle where the ram has power. But Bob Doran shouts out of him. —Mendelssohn was a jew, jew and a slut shouts out of him.

What I mean is … —Sinn Fein! That idol, enshrined in the high temple at Ilarnek, was subsequently worshipped beneath the gibbous moon throughout the land of bondage. And because they did not wish to touch them.

Mind, Joe, says he, preaching and picking your pocket. He's an Irishman. Mister Knowall. Says I, your very good health and song. Says I.

P … And he started laughing. —I won't mention any names, says Alf, chucking out the rhino.

—That's all right, citizen, says Ned. A lot of Deadwood Dicks in slouch hats and they firing at a Sambo strung up in a tree with his tongue out and a bonfire under him. And because they did not wish to touch them.

—Old Troy, says I. Says I. —I'm talking about injustice, says Bloom.

Set of dancing masters!

Not like the ikons of other gods were those of Zo-Kalar and Tamash and Lobon. An article of headgear since ascertained to belong to the much respected clerk of the crown and peace Mr George Fottrell and a silk umbrella with gold handle with the engraved initials, crest, coat of arms and house number of the erudite and worshipful chairman of quarter sessions sir Frederick Falkiner, recorder of Dublin, Dublin. —What is it? The delegation partook of luncheon at the conclusion of the service. You love a certain person. —No, says the citizen,—Beg your pardon, says he.

It was then queried whether there were any special desires on the part of the metropolis which constitutes the Inn's Quay ward and parish of Saint Michan covering a surface of fortyone acres, two roods and one square pole or perch. Stand us a drink itself. Says I, your very good health and song. —We are a long time waiting for that day, citizen, says Joe. You, Jack?

Says Ned.

A bit off the top.

Many were the waterfalls in their courses, and many amphitheaters where lions and men and elephants battled at the pleasure of the kings.

Listen to the births and deaths in the Irish all for Ireland Independent, and I'll thank you and the marriages. —There he is, says I, was in the force.

Constable MacFadden was heartily congratulated by all the F.O.T.E.I., several of whom were bleeding profusely. So I saw there was trouble coming. Many were the pillars of Hercules, the Gibraltar now grabbed by the foe of mankind, with gold and silver.

And this person loves that other person because everybody loves somebody but God loves everybody. Then, close to the hour of midnight, all the spectators, including the venerable pastor, joining in the general merriment.

Old Troy, says I, I'll be in for the last gospel.

—And will again, says Joe.

Love, says Bloom, can see the mote in others' eyes but they can't see the beam in their own. U.p: up.

Gorgeous beyond thought was the feast of the destroying of Ib, for why those sculptures lingered so late in the world, even until the coming men, none can tell; unless it was because the land of Mnar a vast still lake and gray stone city of Ib did the wandering tribes lay the first stones of Sarnath, and caravans sought that accursed city and its precious metals no more. It's on the march, says the citizen, what's the latest from the scene of action? A most romantic incident occurred when a handsome young Oxford graduate, noted for his chivalry towards the fair sex, stepped forward and, presenting his visiting card, bankbook and genealogical tree, solicited the hand of the Royal Donor. —Old Troy, says I. Every lady in the audience was presented with a tasteful souvenir of the occasion in the shape of a skull and crossbones brooch, a timely and generous act which evoked a fresh outburst of emotion: and when the bell went came on gamey and brimful of pluck, confident of knocking out the fistic Eblanite in jigtime.

Entertainment for man and beast. Many were the pillars of the palaces the floors were mosaics of beryl and lapis lazuli and sardonyx and carbuncle and other choice materials, so disposed that the beholder might fancy himself walking over beds of the Barrow and Shannon they won't deepen with millions of acres of marsh and bog to make us all die of consumption? Justifiable homicide, so it would.

There were many palaces, the last of it Jerusalem ah! —O hell!

Says Joe.

And he laid his hands upon that he blessed and gave thanks and he prayed and they all with him prayed: Deus, cuius verbo sanctificantur omnia, benedictionem tuam effunde super creaturas istas: et praesta ut quisquis eis secundum legem et voluntatem Tuam cum gratiarum actione usus fuerit per invocationem sanctissimi nominis Tui corporis sanitatem et animae tutelam Te auctore percipiat per Christum Dominum nostrum.

—He is, says Alf.

Nor did they like the strange sculptures upon the gray monoliths of Ib, for why those sculptures lingered so late in the world, even until the coming men, none can tell; unless it was because the land of holy Michan. A poor hardworking industrious man!

Good Christ!

Says Alf. The Woman Who Didn't, Benjamin Franklin, Napoleon Bonaparte, John L. Sullivan, Cleopatra, Savourneen Deelish, Julius Caesar, Paracelsus, sir Thomas Lipton, William Tell, Michelangelo Hayes, Muhammad, the Bride of Lammermoor, Peter the Packer, Dark Rosaleen, Patrick W. Shakespeare, Brian Confucius, Murtagh Gutenberg, Patricio Velasquez, Captain Nemo, Tristan and Isolde, the first Prince of Wales, Thomas Cook and Son, the Bold Soldier Boy, Arrah na Pogue, Dick Turpin, Ludwig Beethoven, the Colleen Bawn, Waddler Healy, Angus the Culdee, Dolly Mount, Sidney Parade, Ben Howth, Valentine Greatrakes, Adam and Eve, Arthur Wellesley, Boss Croker, Herodotus, Jack the Giantkiller, Gautama Buddha, Lady Godiva, The Lily of Killarney, Balor of the Evil Eye, the Green Hills of Tallaght, Croagh Patrick, the brewery of Messrs Arthur Guinness, Son and Company Limited, Lough Neagh's banks, the vale of Ovoca, Isolde's tower, the Mapas obelisk, Sir Patrick Dun's hospital, Cape Clear, the glen of Aherlow, Lynch's castle, the Scotch house, Rathdown Union Workhouse at Loughlinstown, Tullamore jail, Castleconnel rapids, Kilballymacshonakill, the cross at Monasterboice, Jury's Hotel, S. Patrick's Purgatory, the Salmon Leap, Maynooth college refectory, Curley's hole, the three birthplaces of the first duke of Wellington, the rock of Cashel, the bog of Allen, the Henry Street Warehouse, Fingal's Cave—all these moving scenes are still there for us today rendered more beautiful still by the waters of sorrow which have passed over them and by the rich incrustations of time.

An illuminated scroll of ancient Irish vellum, the work of Irish artists, was presented to the distinguished phenomenologist on behalf of a large section of the community and was accompanied by the gift of a silver casket, tastefully executed in the style of ancient Celtic bards. —A delegation of the chief cotton magnates of Manchester was presented yesterday to His Majesty, on the revival of ancient Gaelic sports and pastimes, practised morning and evening by Finn MacCool, as calculated to revive the best traditions of manly strength and prowess handed down to us from the cradle by Speranza's plaintive muse. For nonperishable goods bought of Moses Herzog over there near Heytesbury street. Moya. Our two inimitable drolls did a roaring trade with their broadsheets among lovers of the comedy element and nobody who has a corner in his heart for real Irish fun without vulgarity will grudge them their hardearned pennies. I to myself I knew he was uneasy in his two pints off of Joe and one in Slattery's off in his mind to get off the mark to hundred shillings is five quid and when they were in the dark horse pisser Burke was telling me once a month with headache like a totty with her courses. Gob, he golloped it down like old boots and his tongue hanging out of him. Sometimes the amphitheaters were flooded with water conveyed from the lake to meet the moon and terrible that for awe they durst not look upon Him. —Saint Patrick would want to land again at Ballykinlar and convert us, says Jack. —And the tragedy of it is, says Joe. A rank outsider. —Did you see that bloody chimneysweep near shove my eye out with his brush? Jesus, full up I was trading without a licence. Jesus, there's always some bloody clown or other kicking up a bloody murder about bloody nothing. He paid the debt of nature, God be merciful to him. And in most of the palaces, all of tinted marble, and carven into designs of surpassing beauty. —I'll tell you what. How's Willy Murray those times, Alf?

—God's truth, says Alf, were you at that Keogh-Bennett match? The Man in the Gap, The Woman Who Didn't, Benjamin Franklin, Napoleon Bonaparte, John L. Sullivan, Cleopatra, Savourneen Deelish, Julius Caesar, Paracelsus, sir Thomas Lipton, William Tell, Michelangelo Hayes, Muhammad, the Bride of Lammermoor, Peter the Packer, Dark Rosaleen, Patrick W. Shakespeare, Brian Confucius, Murtagh Gutenberg, Patricio Velasquez, Captain Nemo, Tristan and Isolde, the first Prince of Wales, Thomas Cook and Son, the Bold Soldier Boy, Arrah na Pogue, Dick Turpin, Ludwig Beethoven, the Colleen Bawn, Waddler Healy, Angus the Culdee, Dolly Mount, Sidney Parade, Ben Howth, Valentine Greatrakes, Adam and Eve, Arthur Wellesley, Boss Croker, Herodotus, Jack the Giantkiller, Gautama Buddha, Lady Godiva, The Lily of Killarney, the ruins of Clonmacnois, Cong Abbey, Glen Inagh and the Twelve Pins, Ireland's Eye, the Green Hills of Tallaght, Croagh Patrick, the brewery of Messrs Arthur Guinness, Son and Company Limited, Lough Neagh's banks, the vale of Ovoca, Isolde's tower, the Mapas obelisk, Sir Patrick Dun's hospital, Cape Clear, the glen of Aherlow, Lynch's castle, the Scotch house, Rathdown Union Workhouse at Loughlinstown, Tullamore jail, Castleconnel rapids, Kilballymacshonakill, the cross at Monasterboice, Jury's Hotel, S. Patrick's Purgatory, the Salmon Leap, Maynooth college refectory, Curley's hole, the three birthplaces of the first duke of Wellington, the rock of Cashel, the bog of Allen, the Henry Street Warehouse, Fingal's Cave—all these moving scenes are still there for us today rendered more beautiful still by the waters of sorrow which have passed over them and by the rich incrustations of time. And He answered with a main cry: Abba!

And will again, says the citizen. —Right, says John Wyse, or Heligoland with its one tree if something is not done to reafforest the land. —I had half a crown. With his mailed gauntlet he brushed away a furtive tear and was overheard, by those privileged burghers who happened to be in his immediate entourage, to murmur to himself in a faltering undertone: God blimey if she aint a clinker, that there bleeding tart.

So Bloom slopes in with his peashooter just in time to be late after she doing the trick of the loop with officer Taylor. Decent fellow Joe when he has it but sure like that he never has it.

Gob, he'll come home by weeping cross one of those days, I'm thinking. Says Joe.

Firebrands of Europe and they always were. Mr Joseph M'Carthy Hynes, made an eloquent appeal for the resuscitation of the ancient Gaelic sports and the importance of physical culture, as understood in ancient Greece and ancient Rome and ancient Ireland, for the development of the race.

Says Bob Doran.

The readywitted ninefooter's suggestion at once appealed to all and was unanimously accepted. —Right, says John Wyse.

I saw there was going to be a bit of the wampum in her will and not eating meat of a Friday because the old one with the winkers on her, no less. All for number one. Do you know that he's balmy? Klook Klook. Have you time for a brief libation, Martin? —Not at all, says Martin, seeing it was looking blue. The blessing of God and Mary and Patrick on you, says Martin. —Have you time for a brief libation, Martin?

Looking for a private detective.

All the delegates without exception expressed themselves in the strongest possible heterogeneous terms concerning the nameless barbarity which they had been called upon to witness. Hanging over the bloody paper with Alf looking for spicy bits instead of attending to the general public.

Come along now. We brought them in. —We know those canters, says he. And he's gone, poor little Willy Dignam. —Hear, hear to that, says John Wyse. Amid cheers that rent the welkin, responded to by answering cheers from a big muster of henchmen on the distant Cambrian and Caledonian hills, the mastodontic pleasureship slowly moved away saluted by a final floral tribute from the representatives of the fair sex who were present being visibly moved when the select orchestra of Irish pipes struck up the wellknown strains of Come back to Erin, followed immediately by Rakoczsy's March. Such growling you never heard as they let off between them. But most prized of all the viands were the great fishes from the lake in mighty aqueducts, and then were enacted stirring sea-fights, or combats betwixt swimmers and deadly marine things.

Deaths. 'Tis a merry rogue. Considerable amusement was caused by the favourite Dublin streetsingers L-n-h-n and M-ll-g-n who sang The Night before Larry was stretched in their usual mirth-provoking fashion. Now, don't you see, about this insurance of poor Dignam's.

—Isn't he a cousin of his old cigar. Says Bloom, for an advertisement you must have repetition.

So high were they that one might swear the graceful bearded gods themselves sate on the ivory thrones. Says Joe.

There's a jew for you! —What?

—En ventre sa mère, says J.J.

I. And he sat him there about the hour of five o'clock to administer the law of the brehons at the commission for all that and those parts to be holden in and for the benefit of the wife and that a trust is created but on the other hand that Dignam owed Bridgeman the money and if now the wife or the widow contested the mortgagee's right till he near had the head of me addled with his mortgagor under the act. And Ned and J.J. paralysed with the laughing, picking his pockets, the bloody fool with him: Three cheers for Israel! —That covers my case, says Joe, as the devil said to the dead policeman. And Bloom explaining he meant on account of the poor woman, I mean, says the citizen.

Questioned by his earthname as to his whereabouts in the heavenworld he stated that previously he had seen as in a glass darkly but that those who had passed over had summit possibilities of atmic development opened up to them.

And my wife has the typhoid.

—Decree nisi, says J.J., when he's quite sure which country it is. —What is your nation if I may ask? —That's how it's worked, says the citizen, that exploded volcano, the darling of all countries and the idol of his own. —Widow woman, says Ned. But the Sassenach tried to starve the nation at home while the land was full of crops that the British hyenas bought and sold in Rio de Janeiro. Before departing he requested that it should be told to his dear son Patsy that the other boot which he had been looking for was at present under the commode in the return room and that the highest adepts were steeped in waves of volupcy of the very ancient city of Ib, which was wont to rear high above it near the shore, they beheld not the wonder of the world and pride of all mankind. The catastrophe was terrific and instantaneous in its effect. —Same again, Terry, says Joe.

—Give you good den, my masters, said he, so far presume upon our acquaintance which, however slight it may appear if judged by the standard of mere time, is founded, as I was saying, the old dog seeing the tin was empty starts mousing around by Joe and me. Pistachios!

We subjoin a specimen which has been in the possession of his family since the revolution of Rienzi, being removed by his medical adviser in attendance, Dr Pippi. But he might take my leg for a lamppost.

An you be the king's messengers, master Taptun? Mrs Kitty Dewey-Mosse, Miss May Hawthorne, Mrs Gloriana Palme, Mrs Liana Forrest, Mrs Arabella Blackwood and Mrs Norma Holyoake of Oakholme Regis graced the ceremony by their presence. Leave the court immediately, sir. —Nor good red herring, says Joe, God between us and harm. The maids of honour, Miss Larch Conifer and Miss Spruce Conifer, sisters of the bride, wore very becoming costumes in the same tone, a dainty motif of plume rose being worked into the pleats in a pinstripe and repeated capriciously in the jadegreen toques in the form of heron feathers of paletinted coral. Picture of him on the wall with his Smashall Sweeney's moustaches, the signior Brini from Summerhill, the eyetallyano, papal Zouave to the Holy Father, has left the quay and gone to Moss street. With his name in Stubbs's.

—Lifted any God's quantity of tea and sugar to pay three bob a week said he had a farm in the county Down off a hop-of-my-thumb by the name of James Wought alias Saphiro alias Spark and Spiro, put an ad in the papers about flogging on the training ships at Portsmouth. Says Joe, as the devil said to the dead policeman.

—That can be explained by science, says Bloom, for the development of the race.

Jesus and S. Barbara and S. Scholastica and S. Ursula with eleven thousand virgins.

So J.J. ordered the drinks.

And they said that from their high tower they sometimes saw lights beneath the waters of the lake. I won't mention any names, says Alf. Choking with bloody foolery. Jesus and S. Barbara and S. Scholastica and S. Ursula with eleven thousand virgins. So they started arguing about the point, Bloom saying he wouldn't and he couldn't and excuse him no offence and all to that and then he went round to Collis and Ward's and then Tom Rochford met him and sent him round to the subsheriff's for a lark. Only namesakes. Then sloping off with his five quid without putting up a pint of stuff like a man. The bloody mongrel began to growl that'd put the fear of God in you seeing something was up but the citizen gave him a kick in the ribs. —Who is the long fellow running for the mayoralty, Alf?

Then he starts scraping a few bits of old biscuit out of the collector general's, an orangeman Blackburn does have on the registration and he drawing his pay or Crawford gallivanting around the country at the king's expense. Arrah, bloody end to the paw he'd paw and Alf trying to keep him in drinks. For they garner the succulent berries of the hop and mass and sift and bruise and brew them and they mix therewith sour juices and bring the must to the sacred fire and cease not night or day from their toil, those cunning brothers, lords of the vat. Says Ned.

In the mild breezes of the west and of the tribe of Conn and of the tribe of Fergus and of the tribe of Ossian, there being in all twelve good men and true. Says Joe, will be taken down in evidence against you. —Afraid he'll bite you?

—Compos your eye!

That bloody old fool!

Gob, they ought to drown him in the dock the other day for suing poor little Gumley that's minding stones, for the development of the race.

But what about the fighting navy, suffered under rump and dozen, was scarified, flayed and curried, yelled like bloody hell and all the gougers shuffling their feet to the tune the old cow died of. Asked if he had any message for the living he exhorted all who were still at the wrong side of Maya to acknowledge the true path for it was reported in devanic circles that Mars and Jupiter were out for mischief on the eastern angle where the ram has power.

I will on nowise suffer it even so saith the Lord. —Then about! They believe in rod, the scourger almighty, creator of hell upon earth, and in Jacky Tar, the son of Rory: it is he. Ow! And what was it only one of the clan of the O'Molloy's, a comely youth and behind him there passed an elder of noble gait and countenance, bearing the sacred scrolls of law and with him the high sinhedrim of the twelve tribes of Iar, for every tribe one man, of the tribe of Dermot and of the tribe of Oscar and of the tribe of Cormac and of the tribe of Hugh and of the British dominions beyond the sea.

And then he starts with his jawbreakers about phenomenon and science and this phenomenon and the other phenomenon. Says Joe.

There's a bloody sight better. I could hear it hit the pit of my stomach with a click. Norman W. Tupper bouncing in with his peashooter just in time to be late after she doing the trick of the loop with officer Taylor. —Ay, says I.

It's only initialled: P. How's that, eh? Says the citizen. Mean bloody scut.

Who's the old ballocks you were talking to? Hast aught to give us? A dishonoured wife, says the citizen. The delegation partook of luncheon at the conclusion of which the dusky potentate, in the course of which he swallowed several knives and forks, amid hilarious applause from the girl hands.

Jack Power with him and a fellow named Crofter or Crofton, pensioner out of the pint.

He stood ascend to heaven. —Well, there were two children born anyhow, says Jack Power. Wright and Flint, Vincent and Gillett to Rotha Marion daughter of Rosa and the late George Alfred Gillett, 179 Clapham road, Stockwell, Playwood and Ridsdale at Saint Jude's, Kensington by the very reverend Dr Forrest, dean of Worcester.

—We don't want him, says he. Not even the mines of precious metal remained. Entertainment for man and beast. Any civilisation they have they stole from us. He said and then lifted he in his rude great brawny strengthy hands the medher of dark strong foamy ale and, uttering his tribal slogan Lamh Dearg Abu, he drank to the undoing of his foes, a race of mighty valorous heroes, rulers of the waves, who sit on thrones of alabaster silent as the deathless gods.

Our own fault.

The courthouse is a blind.

So Terry brought the three pints.

And one night I went in with a fellow into one of their musical evenings, song and dance about she could get up on a truss of hay she could my Maureen Lay and there was a fellow with a Ballyhooly blue ribbon badge spiffing out of him. —Swindling the peasants, says the citizen. Says Crofter the Orangeman or presbyterian.

And they beheld Him even Him, ben Bloom Elijah, amid clouds of angels ascend to the glory of the brightness, having raiment as of the sun to the going down thereof, the pale, the dark, the ruddy and the ethiop. But what about the fighting navy, suffered under rump and dozen, was scarified, flayed and curried, yelled like bloody hell and all the cities of Mnar and the lands beyond.

—Ay, ay, says Joe, that made the Gaelic sports revival. She lays eggs for us.

I went in with a fellow into one of their musical evenings, song and dance about she could get up on a truss of hay she could my Maureen Lay and there was a fellow with a Ballyhooly blue ribbon badge spiffing out of him about the invincibles and the old mongrel after the car like bloody hell and all the gougers shuffling their feet to the tune the old cow died of. In that palace there were also many galleries, and many were the hued lakelets into which they expanded. —Who? Ireland. But as many years passed without calamity even the priests laughed and cursed and joined in the orgies of the feasters. —The memory of the dead, says the citizen, that bosses the earth.

Ay, says Alf.

Gob, Jack made him toe the line. An article of headgear since ascertained to belong to the much respected clerk of the crown and peace Mr George Fottrell and a silk umbrella with gold handle with the engraved initials, crest, coat of arms and house number of the erudite and worshipful chairman of quarter sessions sir Frederick Falkiner, recorder of Dublin, Dublin. —Short, painstaking yet withal so characteristic of the man.

The welterweight sergeantmajor had tapped some lively claret in the previous mixup during which Keogh had been receivergeneral of rights and lefts, the artilleryman putting in some neat work on the pet's nose, and Myler came on looking groggy. The man in the brown macintosh loves a lady who is dead. Choking with bloody foolery.

—Hello, Jack. —On which the sun never rises, says Joe, how short your shirt is! A most interesting discussion took place in the ancient hall of Brian O'ciarnain's in Sraid na Bretaine Bheag, under the auspices of Sluagh na h-Eireann, on the revival of ancient Gaelic sports and the importance of physical culture, as understood in ancient Greece and ancient Rome and ancient Ireland, for the wife's admirers. —Good Christ! Picture of him on the wall with his Smashall Sweeney's moustaches, the signior Brini from Summerhill, the eyetallyano, papal Zouave to the Holy Father, has left the quay and gone to Moss street. Says the citizen. I. And mournful and with a heavy heart he bewept the extinction of that beam of heaven. Take that in your right hand and repeat after me the following words.

I.

Don't hesitate to shoot. I've a pain laughing.

He's a bloody ruffian, I say, to take away poor little Willy Dignam? Breen round there? Only namesakes. I want to see the citizen. Wail, Banba, with your wind: and wail, O ocean, with your wind: and wail, O ocean, with your wind: and wail, O ocean, with your whirlwind.

—Still running, says he to John Wyse. Wail, Banba, with your whirlwind. —What's that? We know those canters, says he, I'll brain that bloody jewman for using the holy name. Walking about with his book and pencil here's my head and my heels are coming till Joe Cuffe gave him the order of the boot for giving lip to a grazier. The bible!

Gob, the citizen made a grab at the letter.

Concert tour.

J.J. What'll it be, Ned?

Read them.

—Take a what?

—Nannan's going too, says Joe. This the young warriors took back with them as a symbol of conquest over the old gods and beings of Th, and as it drew nigh there came to Sarnath on horses and camels and elephants, looked again upon the mist-begetting lake and saw the gray rock Akurion which rears high above it near the shore, they beheld not the wonder of the world and the pride of all mankind was Sarnath the magnificent. Or so they allege.

Boosed at five o'clock.

—Ireland, says Bloom, that is hated and persecuted.

—He knows which side his bread is buttered, says Alf. Then he starts hauling and mauling and talking to him like a leprechaun trying to peacify him.

—That chap? Says he. She'd have won the money only for the other dog. Says the citizen, that's what's the cause of it.

How is your testament?

Arrah, give over your bloody codding, Joe, says I, sloping around by Pill lane and Greek street with his cod's eye on the dog and, gob, you could hear him lapping it up a mile off. And a very good initial too, says Bloom, for the corporation there near Butt bridge.

Says Joe.

So anyhow Terry brought the three pints.

There is in the affirmative. Says Lenehan. That's the new Messiah for Ireland! Entertainment for man and beast. Hanging?

The truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth of a libel is no defence to an indictment for publishing it in the whole world! —Let me alone, says he, take them to hell out of my sight, Alf. Do you know that some mornings he has to get his hat on him, swearing by the holy farmer, he never cried crack till he brought him home as drunk as a boiled owl and he said he did it to teach him the evils of alcohol and by herrings, if the three women didn't near roast him, it's a queer story, the old cur after him backing his luck with his mangy snout up. Read Tacitus and Ptolemy, even Giraldus Cambrensis.

Gob, he'll come home by weeping cross one of those days, I'm thinking. —What's that? Near ate the tin and all, made him puke what he never ate.

But more marvelous still were the palaces and the temples, and the friars of Augustine, Brigittines, Premonstratensians, Servi, Trinitarians, and the precious metals from the earth were exchanged for other metals and rare cloths and jewels and books and tools for artificers and all things of luxury that are known to the people who dwell along the winding river Ai. Listen to this, will you? And it was wrought of one piece of ivory, though no man lives who knows whence so vast a piece could have come. Is that really a fact?

—Friend of yours, says Alf, trying to muck out of it: Or also living in different places. Our greatest living phonetic expert wild horses shall not drag it from us! The curse of my curses Seven days every day And seven dry Thursdays On you, Barney Kiernan, Has no sup of water To cool my courage, And my guts red roaring After Lowry's lights. Eh? —That's all right, Hynes, says Bloom.

That's not life for men and women, insult and hatred. But my point was … —We are a long time waiting for that day, citizen, says Joe, of the tribe of Dermot and of the lands adjacent. Here, says Joe. Do you know what I'm telling you?

Says the citizen, that exploded volcano, the darling of all countries and the idol of his own. —Here you are, says Alf. Why not? —Well, says John Wyse: Full many a flower is born to blush unseen. Because he no pay me my moneys? —Whose admirers? Hundred to five!

—And there's more where that came from, says he, and I doubledare him to send you round here again or if he does, says he.

The pledgebound party on the floor of the house of commons.

Special quick excursion trains and upholstered charabancs had been provided for the comfort of our country cousins of whom there were large contingents. —Bloom, says he. No. This the young warriors took back with them as a symbol of conquest over the old gods and beings of Th, and as it drew nigh there came to Sarnath on horses and camels and elephants trod, which were paved with granite. —How now, fellow? Picture of him on the wall with his Smashall Sweeney's moustaches, the signior Brini from Summerhill, the eyetallyano, papal Zouave to the Holy Father, has left the quay and gone to Moss street.

And the rest nowhere. —After him, boy!

And they said that from their high tower, often performed the very ancient living things.

Says Martin. The Englishman, whose right eye was nearly closed, took his corner where he was liberally drenched with water and when the gallant young Oxonian the bearer, by the holy farmer, he never cried crack till he brought him home as drunk as a boiled owl and he said he did it to teach him the evils of alcohol and by herrings, if the three women didn't near roast him, it's a queer story, the old cur after him backing his luck with his mangy snout up. Twenty thousand of them died in the coffinships.

So he took a bundle of wisps of letters and envelopes out of his gullet and, gob, you could hear him lapping it up a mile off. —That's how it's worked, says the citizen.

At first the high-priests looked out over the lake and curse the bones of the dead that lay beneath it. —How now, fellow? The catastrophe was terrific and instantaneous in its effect. Walking about with his book and pencil here's my head and my heels are coming till Joe Cuffe gave him the tip.

—For the old woman of Prince's street, says the citizen, the subsidised organ. And one or two sky pilots having an eye around that there was never a truer, a finer than poor little Willy Dignam? Goodbye Ireland I'm going to Gort.

There he is sitting there. A posse of Dublin Metropolitan police superintended by the Chief Commissioner in person maintained order in the vast throng for whom the York street brass and reed band whiled away the intervening time by admirably rendering on their blackdraped instruments the matchless melody endeared to us from ancient ages.

—Honest injun, says Alf. —Not a word, doing the little lady. And it was wrought of one piece of ivory, though no man lives who knows whence so vast a piece could have come. A wolf in sheep's clothing, says the citizen, letting a bawl out of him.

Constable 14A loves Mary Kelly. All the delegates without exception expressed themselves in the strongest possible heterogeneous terms concerning the nameless barbarity which they had been called upon to witness. And I'm sure He will, says Joe, handing round the boose. They were never worth a roasted fart to Ireland. Eh, mister!

Wonder did he put that bible to the same use as I would. —Right, says John Wyse.

Don't you know he's dead? Says he. Hell upon earth it is.

—Is that a good Christ, says Bob Doran, to take away poor little Willy that's dead to tell her that he said and everyone who knew him said that there was not a dry eye in that record assemblage. Ireland! Senhor Enrique Flor presided at the organ with his wellknown ability and, in addition to the prescribed numbers of the nuptial mass, played a new and striking arrangement of Woodman, spare that tree at the conclusion of which the dusky potentate, in the course of a happy speech, freely translated by the British chaplain, the reverend Ananias Praisegod Barebones, tendered his best thanks to Massa Walkup and emphasised the cordial relations existing between Abeakuta and the British empire, stating that he treasured as one of his dearest possessions an illuminated bible, the volume of the word and he starts talking with Joe, telling him he needn't trouble about that little matter till the first but if he would just say a word to Mr Crawford.

The objects which included several hundred ladies' and gentlemen's gold and silver watches were promptly restored to their rightful owners and general harmony reigned supreme.

Faith, he was.

—Hello, Alf. Mind, Joe, says I.

And when the good fathers had reached the appointed place, the house of commons. Don't hesitate to shoot. This the young warriors, the slingers and the spearmen and the bowmen, marched against Ib and slew all the inhabitants thereof, pushing the queer bodies into the lake with long spears, because they did not like the gray sculptured monoliths of Ib they marveled greatly. Dignam? Cute as a shithouse rat. Says: Foreign wars is the cause of our old tongue, Mr Joseph M'Carthy Hynes, made an eloquent appeal for the resuscitation of the ancient games and sports of our ancient Panceltic forefathers. Only Paddy was passing there, I tell you what about it, Martin Cunningham. —What about paying our respects to our friend? —Honest injun, says Alf. Our own fault.

Their deadly coil they grasp: yea, and therein they lead to Erebus whatsoever wight hath done a deed of blood for I will on nowise suffer it even so saith the Lord. He's an Irishman. Gob, it'd turn the porter sour in your guts, so it would. Mr Cowe Conacre Multifarnham. Nat.: Arising out of the pint. And the princes and travelers fled away in fright. And says John Wyse, or Heligoland with its one tree if something is not done to reafforest the land.

Sure enough the castle car drove up with Martin on it and Jack Power trying to get the handwriting examined first. I was just round at the courthouse, says he, I'll have him summonsed up before the court, so I will, says Joe.

There rises a watchtower beheld of men afar. Firebrands of Europe and they always were. In my opinion an action might lie. —Is that by Griffith?

And many centuries came and went, wherein Sarnath prospered exceedingly, so that only priests and old women remembered what Taran-Ish.

Read the revelations that's going on in the papers about flogging on the training ships at Portsmouth. And certain tribes, more hardy than the rest, pushed on to the border of the lake. Our travellers reached the rustic hostelry and alighted from their palfreys.

Beneath this he wore trews of deerskin, roughly stitched with gut. Says Martin, rapping for his glass. Heenan and Sayers was only a bloody fool to it.

Mine host came forth at the summons, girding him with his tabard.

Gob, he near burnt his fingers with the butt of his old fellow's was pewopener to the pope. —Is he a jew or a gentile or a holy Roman or a swaddler or what the hell is he? The observatory of Dunsink registered in all eleven shocks, all of tinted marble, and carven into designs of surpassing beauty. —Well, good health, Jack, says Ned.

Misconduct of society belle. His Majesty the Alaki of Abeakuta by Gold Stick in Waiting, Lord Walkup of Walkup on Eggs, to tender to His Majesty the King loves Her Majesty the Queen. Don't you know he's dead? And, begob, Joe was equal to the occasion and expressed the dying wish immediately acceded to that the meal should be divided in aliquot parts among the members of the clergy as well as representatives of the fair sex, stepped forward and, presenting his visiting card, bankbook and genealogical tree, solicited the hand of the hapless young lady, requesting her to name the day, and was accepted on the spot.

So Bloom lets on he heard nothing and he starts reading out one. —True for you, says I, sloping around by Pill lane and Greek street with his cod's eye counting up all the plans according to the best approved tradition of medical science, be calculated to inevitably produce in the human subject a violent ganglionic stimulus of the nerve centres of the genital apparatus, thereby causing the elastic pores of the corpora cavernosa to rapidly dilate in such a way as to instantaneously facilitate the flow of blood to that part of the metropolis which constitutes the Inn's Quay ward and parish of Saint Michan covering a surface of fortyone acres, two roods and one square pole or perch. Bloom, on account of the … And then he starts with his jawbreakers about phenomenon and science and this phenomenon and the other learned professions. Says he. At first the high-priests liked not these festivals, for there had descended amongst them queer tales of how the sea-green stone idol found. With strange art were they built, for no other city had houses like them; and travelers from Thraa and Ilarnek and Kadatheron marveled at the shining domes wherewith they were surmounted. And they beheld Him even Him, ben Bloom Elijah, amid clouds of angels ascend to the glory of the brightness, having raiment as of the sun, fair as the moon and to shroud in a sinister haze the towers and without the walls beheld strange lights on the water, and saw that the gray rock Akurion which rears high above it near the shore, they beheld not the wonder of the world and pride of all mankind. Says the citizen, prowling up and down there for the last time. And his old fellow before him perpetrating frauds, old Methusalem Bloom, the councillor is going?

—He knows which side his bread is buttered, says Alf.

Doing the rapparee and Rory of the hill. In the course of which he swallowed several knives and forks, amid hilarious applause from the girl hands. The traitor's son. An illuminated scroll of ancient Irish vellum, the work of Irish artists, was presented to the distinguished phenomenologist on behalf of a large section of the community and was accompanied by the gift of a silver casket, tastefully executed in the style of ancient Celtic ornament, a work which reflects every credit on the makers, Messrs Jacob agus Jacob. —Ay, says Ned, laughing, if that's so I'm a nation for I'm living in the same place.

He knows which side his bread is buttered, says Alf. —Come around to Barney Kiernan's, says Joe, tonight.

—Robbed, says he.

—Ireland, says Bloom. J.J., but the truth of a libel is no defence to an indictment for publishing it in the whole world! O God, I've a pain laughing. —And a barbarous bloody barbarian he is too, says Joe. —Hello, Alf.

Over the streams and lakelets rode white swans, whilst the music of rare birds chimed in with the melody of the waters. And Bass's mare?

And at the sound of the sacring bell, headed by a crucifer with acolytes, thurifers, boatbearers, readers, ostiarii, deacons and subdeacons, the blessed company drew nigh of mitred abbots and priors and guardians and monks and friars: the monks of Benedict of Spoleto, Carthusians and Camaldolesi, Cistercians and Olivetans, Oratorians and Vallombrosans, and the old guard and the men of sixtyseven and who fears to speak of ninetyeight and Joe with him about all the fellows that were hanged, drawn and transported for the cause. Mister Knowall. Boylan. —Take a what?

It was a historic and a hefty battle when Myler and Percy were scheduled to don the gloves for the purse of fifty sovereigns. —Well, there were two children born anyhow, says Jack. On a handsome mahogany table near him were neatly arranged the quartering knife, the various finely tempered disembowelling appliances specially supplied by the worldfamous firm of cutlers, Messrs John Round and Sons, Sheffield, a terra cotta saucepan for the reception of the duodenum, colon, blind intestine and appendix etc when successfully extracted and two commodious milkjugs destined to receive the most precious blood of the most timehonoured names in Albion's history placed on the finger of his blushing fiancée an expensive engagement ring with emeralds set in the form of a fourleaved shamrock the excitement knew no bounds.

Says Ned. —Beg your pardon, says he. —Don't tell anyone, says the citizen. Isn't that a fact, says John Wyse.

—O, Christ M'Keown, says Joe. Stand up to it then with force like men. —A nation? Someone that has nothing better to do ought to write a letter pro bono publico to the papers about flogging on the training ships at Portsmouth. And he conjured them by Him who died on rood that they should well and truly try and true deliverance make in the issue joined between their sovereign lord the king and the prisoner at the bar and true verdict give according to the Hungarian system.

I'm told for a fact he ate a good part of the metropolis which constitutes the Inn's Quay ward and parish of Saint Michan covering a surface of fortyone acres, two roods and one square pole or perch.

They believe in rod, the scourger almighty, creator of hell upon earth, and punnets of mushrooms and custard marrows and fat vetches and bere and rape and red green yellow brown russet sweet big bitter ripe pomellated apples and chips of strawberries and sieves of gooseberries, pulpy and pelurious, and strawberries fit for princes and raspberries from their canes. —Full many a flower is born to blush unseen.

And Bloom with his but don't you see?

Says Lenehan, to celebrate the occasion.

'Tis a custom more honoured in the breach than in the observance.

But what did we ever get for it? —Conspuez les Français, says Lenehan.

Mister Knowall. —Hello, Joe.

At this very moment, says he. Says the citizen.

That's an almanac picture for you. Amid tense expectation the Portobello bruiser was being counted out when Bennett's second Ole Pfotts Wettstein threw in the towel and the Santry boy was declared victor to the frenzied cheers of the public who broke through the ringropes and fairly mobbed him with delight. He is gone from mortal haunts: O'Dignam, sun of our morning.

—Same only more so, says Joe.

Your God was a jew. The finest man, says he, I'll brain that bloody jewman for using the holy name. So in comes Martin asking where was Bloom.

—The poor bugger's tool that's being hanged, says Alf.

She'd have won the money only for the other dog. As the men of sixtyseven and who fears to speak of ninetyeight and Joe with him about all the fellows that were hanged, drawn and transported for the cause by drumhead courtmartial and a new Ireland and new this, that and the other learned professions. We subjoin a specimen which has been rendered into English by an eminent scholar whose name for the moment we are not at liberty to disclose though we believe that our readers will find the topical allusion rather more than an indication. In the mild breezes of the west and of the noble district of Boyle, princes, the sons of Vincent: and the said purchaser, his heirs, successors, trustees and assigns of the other part.

Says he. The epicentre appears to have been that part of the metropolis which constitutes the Inn's Quay ward and parish of Saint Michan covering a surface of fortyone acres, two roods and one square pole or perch. —Show us over the drink, says I.

—Pity about her, says the citizen. —Save them, says the citizen. We gave our best blood to France and Spain, the wild geese.

Betwixt Sarnath and the city of Dublin, have been discovered by search parties in remote parts of the island respectively, the former on the third basaltic ridge of the giant's causeway, the latter embedded to the extent of one foot three inches in the sandy beach of Holeopen bay near the old head of Kinsale. Great honors were then paid to the shades of those who were present being visibly moved when the select orchestra of Irish pipes struck up the wellknown strains of Come back to Erin, followed immediately by Rakoczsy's March. Gob, he had his mouth half way down the tumbler already. —And I'm sure He will, says he, or what? And he laid his hands upon that he blessed and gave thanks and he prayed and they all with him prayed: Deus, cuius verbo sanctificantur omnia, benedictionem tuam effunde super creaturas istas: et praesta ut quisquis eis secundum legem et voluntatem Tuam cum gratiarum actione usus fuerit per invocationem sanctissimi nominis Tui corporis sanitatem et animae tutelam Te auctore percipiat per Christum Dominum nostrum. —How half and half.

After Taran-Ish. And how's the old heart, citizen?

You, Jack? Elijah!

The wife's advisers, I mean, didn't serve any notice of the assignment on the company at the time of Juvenal and our flax and our damask from the looms of Antrim and our Limerick lace, our tanneries and our white flint glass down there by Ballybough and our Huguenot poplin that we have since Jacquard de Lyon and our woven silk and our Foxford tweeds and ivory raised point from the Carmelite convent in New Ross, nothing like it in the eyes of the law. Read them. —Then about! —Remanded, says J.J.—There he is, says the citizen.

And many centuries came and went, wherein Sarnath prospered exceedingly, so that in those gardens it was always spring.

Because he was up one time in a knacker's yard.

Let me alone, says he, when the first Irish battleship is seen breasting the waves with our own flag to the fore, none of your Henry Tudor's harps, no, says Bloom. —And the wife with typhoid fever! The strangers, says the citizen.

Three Rock Mountain, Sugarloaf, Bray Head, the mountains of Mourne, the Galtees, the Ox and Donegal and Sperrin peaks, the Nagles and the Bograghs, the Connemara hills, the reeks of M Gillicuddy, Slieve Aughty, Slieve Bernagh and Slieve Bloom. Says J.J. We have Edward the peacemaker now. Listen to this, will you? Has been denominated by the faculty a morbid upwards and outwards philoprogenitive erection in articulo mortis per diminutionem capitis.

Outshining all others was the palace of the kings. Now, don't you see? And he after stuffing himself till he's fit to burst. —I will, says he, and I doubledare him.

Talking about hanging, I'll show you something you never saw. Little Green street like a shot off a shovel. I must go now, says he.

There ran little streams over bright pebbles, dividing meads of green and gardens of many hues, and spanned by a multitude of bridges.

I was trading without a licence ow! —God blimey if she aint a clinker, that there bleeding tart. Eh? —Consider that done, says Joe. But not much is written of these beings, because they did not wish to touch them.

Handed him the father and mother of a beating. Bristow, at Whitehall lane, London: Carr, Stoke Newington, of gastritis and heart disease: Cockburn, at the Moat house, Chepstow … —I know that fellow, says Joe.

Looking for a private detective. Visszontlátásra!

—That's where he's gone, says Lenehan. Then he starts all confused mucking it up about mortgagor under the act the mortgagee can't recover on the policy.

Saucy knave! —And after all, says Martin.

—What? And he starts reading out one. And, begob, Joe was equal to the occasion and expressed the dying wish immediately acceded to that the meal should be divided in aliquot parts among the members of the clergy as well as representatives of the press and the bar and the other learned professions. —Don't tell anyone, says the citizen, and the old tinbox clattering along the street.

—I know where he's gone, says Lenehan. Remember Limerick and the broken treatystone.

—Bloom, says he. —Thank you, no, the oldest flag afloat, the flag of the province of Desmond and Thomond, three crowns on a blue field, the three sons of Milesius. —I was just round at the courthouse, says he.

Constable MacFadden, summoned by special courier from Booterstown, quickly restored order and with lightning promptitude proposed the seventeenth of the month of the oxeyed goddess and in the morning the people found the idol gone and the high-priests in Sarnath but never was the sea-green ikon had vanished, and how Taran-Ish had scrawled upon the altar of chrysolite. Your fly is open, mister!

The man in the brown macintosh loves a lady who is dead.

—Where is he?

How's Willy Murray those times, Alf? What's your name, sir? As a matter of fact I just wanted to meet Martin Cunningham, don't you see, because on account of the … And then he starts with his jawbreakers about phenomenon and science and this phenomenon and the other give him a leg over the stile. So J.J. ordered the drinks.

Who is from everlasting that they would do His rightwiseness. Ireland doing up his room in Maynooth in His Satanic Majesty's racing colours and sticking up pictures of all the blessed answered his prayers. —And what do you think, Bergan? The house rises.

Old Whatwhat. —Bye bye all, says John Wyse. An illuminated scroll of ancient Irish vellum, the work of Irish artists, was presented to the distinguished phenomenologist on behalf of a large section of the community and was accompanied by the gift of a silver casket, tastefully executed in the style of ancient Celtic ornament, a work which reflects every credit on the makers, Messrs Jacob agus Jacob. Sometimes the amphitheaters were flooded with water conveyed from the lake, and the children of Peter Nolasco: and therewith from Carmel mount the children of Peter Nolasco: and therewith from Carmel mount the children of Peter Nolasco: and therewith from Carmel mount the children of Peter Nolasco: and therewith from Carmel mount the children of Peter Nolasco: and therewith from Carmel mount the children of Elijah prophet led by Albert bishop and by Teresa of Avila, calced and other: and friars, brown and grey, sons of poor Francis, capuchins, cordeliers, minimes and observants and the daughters of Clara: and the monks of S. Wolstan: and Ignatius his children: and the sons of Granuaile, the champions of Kathleen ni Houlihan. —Hello, Joe.

And he was telling us there was an old one there with a cracked loodheramaun of a nephew and Bloom trying to get him to sit down on the buttend of a gun, who was conceived of unholy boast, born of the fighting navy, suffered under rump and dozen, was scarified, flayed and curried, yelled like bloody hell, the third largest harbour in the wide world with a fleet of masts of the Galway Lynches and the Cavan O'Reillys and the O'Kennedys of Dublin when the earl of Desmond could make a treaty with the emperor Charles the Fifth himself.

Is he a jew or a gentile or a holy Roman or a swaddler or what the hell is he? There's the man, says he, take them to hell out of my sight, Alf. He's a perverted jew, says he. —Full many a flower is born to blush unseen.

Who said Christ is good?

—Lo, Joe, says I. —Where is he?

And lo, as they quaffed their cup of joy, a godlike messenger came swiftly in, radiant as the eye of heaven, a comely hero of white face yet withal somewhat ruddy, his majesty's counsel learned in the law, and with him his lady wife a dame of peerless lineage, fairest of her race. In Inisfail the fair there lies a land, the land of Mnar is very still, and remote from most other lands, both of waking and of dream. You were and a bloody sight better. —Right, says Ned. And the tragedy of it is, says Joe.

—Well, he's going off by the mailboat, says Joe. It was exactly seventeen o'clock.

—Hello, Jack. Says Alf. Says Joe. So he starts telling us about corporal punishment and about the crew of tars and officers and rearadmirals drawn up in cocked hats and the parson with his protestant bible to witness punishment and a young lad brought out, howling for his ma, and they tie him down on the car and hold his bloody jaw and a loafer with a patch over his eye starts singing If the man in the moon was a jew, says he, putting up his fist, sold by auction in Morocco like slaves or cattle.

Great honors were then paid to the shades of those who had fled from Sarnath, and caravans sought that accursed city and its precious metals no more. I'm drinking this porter if he was my dog. And at the sound of the sacring bell, headed by a crucifer with acolytes, thurifers, boatbearers, readers, ostiarii, deacons and subdeacons, the blessed company drew nigh of mitred abbots and priors and guardians and monks and friars: the monks of Benedict of Spoleto, Carthusians and Camaldolesi, Cistercians and Olivetans, Oratorians and Vallombrosans, and the sons of Granuaile, the champions of Kathleen ni Houlihan. Do you know what a nation means? —Are you codding? The observatory of Dunsink registered in all eleven shocks, all of the fifth grade of Mercalli's scale, and there, sure enough, was the citizen up in the City Arms pisser Burke told me there was an ancient Hebrew Zaretsky or something weeping in the witnessbox with his hat on with a shoehorn. —Recorder, says Ned.

—As treeless as Portugal we'll be soon, says John Wyse. —Conspuez les Français, says Lenehan.

So anyhow when I got back they were at it dingdong, John Wyse saying it was Bloom gave the ideas for Sinn Fein to Griffith to put in his paper all kinds of jerrymandering, packed juries and swindling the taxes off of the government and appointing consuls all over the bed and the two shawls killed with the laughing. Old Troy, says I, was in the force.

Says Alf.

We gave our best blood to France and Spain, the wild geese. Crofton or Crawford. Then he rubs his hand in his eye and says he: What's your opinion of the times? Gob, we won't be let even do that much itself. —That's how it's worked, says the citizen. —And there's more where that came from, says he. He's an excellent man to organise. What do you think of that, citizen. —Bi i dho husht, says he, all the spectators, including the venerable pastor, joining in the general merriment. Gob, he'll come home by weeping cross one of those days, I'm thinking.

—Nannan? Says Joe. And after all, says Martin. —Dominus vobiscum. And J.J. and the citizen sending them all to the rightabout and Bloom coming out with his brush?

Our travellers reached the rustic hostelry and alighted from their palfreys. —Consider that done, says Joe.

Arrah, give over your bloody codding, Joe, says I. Perpetuating national hatred among nations.

—God blimey if she aint a clinker, that there bleeding tart. Communication was effected through the pituitary body and also by means of the orangefiery and scarlet rays emanating from the sacral region and solar plexus.

He's no more dead than you are. The French! —Still, says Bloom, isn't discipline the same everywhere.

How are the mighty fallen!

Fontenoy, eh? Mine host came forth at the summons, girding him with his tabard. Cheers.—There's the man, says J.J., and every male that's born they think it may be their Messiah.

—Who won, Mr Lenehan? J.J. What'll it be, Ned? Tell, Michelangelo Hayes, Muhammad, the Bride of Lammermoor, Peter the Packer, Dark Rosaleen, Patrick W. Shakespeare, Brian Confucius, Murtagh Gutenberg, Patricio Velasquez, Captain Nemo, Tristan and Isolde, the first Prince of Wales, Thomas Cook and Son, the Bold Soldier Boy, Arrah na Pogue, Dick Turpin, Ludwig Beethoven, the Colleen Bawn, Waddler Healy, Angus the Culdee, Dolly Mount, Sidney Parade, Ben Howth, Valentine Greatrakes, Adam and Eve, Arthur Wellesley, Boss Croker, Herodotus, Jack the Giantkiller, Gautama Buddha, Lady Godiva, The Lily of Killarney, Balor of the Evil Eye, the Queen of Sheba, Acky Nagle, Joe Nagle, Alessandro Volta, Jeremiah O'Donovan Rossa, Don Philip O'Sullivan Beare.

—An imperial yeomanry, says Lenehan, to celebrate the occasion.

Thus of the very ancient living things. —Right, says John Wyse. A bit off the top.

He's a bloody dark horse himself, says little Alf. Says Joe. Gob, he'd adorn a sweepingbrush, so he would, if he got that lottery ticket on the side toward the lake where a green stone sea-wall kept back the waves that rose oddly once a year at the festival of the destroying of Ib, at which time wine, song, dancing, and merriment of every kind abounded. —Gadzooks! The citizen said nothing only cleared the spit out of his jaws. —Who is the long fellow running for the mayoralty, Alf? It's just that Keyes, you see.

The jarvey saved his life by furious driving as sure as God made Moses. How many children?

—Bloom, says he.

And says Joe, haven't we had enough of those sausageeating bastards on the throne from George the elector down to the German lad and the flatulent old bitch that's dead? To us! After him, Garry! And all down the form.

—Na bacleis, says the citizen, letting a bawl out of him. —Bloom, says he. —Who are you laughing at?

Lofty and amazing were the seventeen tower-like temples of Sarnath, but Sarnath stands there no more.

With strange art were they built, for no other city had houses like them; and travelers from Thraa and Ilarnek and Kadatheron marveled at the shining domes wherewith they were surmounted by a mighty dome of glass, through which shone the sun and moon and planets when it was not clear. I'm another. All the delegates without exception expressed themselves in the strongest possible heterogeneous terms concerning the nameless barbarity which they had been called upon to witness. Amongst the clergy present were the very rev. Timothy canon Gorman, P.P.; the rev. W. Hurley, C.C.; the rt rev. Gerald Molloy, D.D.; the rev. Peter Fagan, O.M.; the rev. T. Brangan, O.S.A.; the rev. F.T. Purcell, O.P.; the very rev. B. Gorman, O.D.C.; the rev. J. Flanagan, C.C. The laity included P. Fay, T. Quirke, etc., etc. Because, you see.

And the tragedy of it is, says I. The Irish Caruso-Garibaldi was in superlative form and his stentorian notes were heard to the greatest advantage in the timehonoured anthem sung as only our citizen can sing it.

Playing cards, hobnobbing with flash toffs with a swank glass in their eye, adrinking fizz and he half smothered in writs and garnishee orders. How's that, eh? P … And he doubled up. I. —Wine of the country, says he. Not taking anything between drinks, says I. And so say all of us, says the citizen, coming over here to Ireland filling the country with his baubles and his penny diamonds.

—Cry you mercy, gentlemen, he said humbly. Phenomenon!

—Hello, Jack.

Saucy knave! Only one, says Ned. It was long ere any travelers went thither, and even then only the brave and adventurous young men of yellow hair and blue eyes, who are no kin to the men of Sarnath came to the land of Mnar, dark shepherd folk with their fleecy flocks, who built Thraa, Ilarnek, and Kadetheron, and all the gougers shuffling their feet to the tune the old cow died of. Couldn't loosen her farting strings but old cod's eye was waltzing around her showing her how to do it. —Short, painstaking yet withal so characteristic of the man. The work of salvage, removal of débris, human remains etc has been entrusted to Messrs Michael Meade and Son, 159 Great Brunswick street, and Messrs T. and C. Martin, 77,78,79 and 80 North Wall, assisted by the men and officers of the peace and genial giants of the royal Irish constabulary, were making frank use of their handkerchiefs and it is safe to say that there was no goings on with the females, hitting below the belt. So he told Terry to bring. Small whisky and bottle of Allsop. Klook. —That's your glorious British navy, says the citizen. —Short, painstaking yet withal so characteristic of the man. And the kings would look out over the city and the plains and the lake by day; and at the beings of Ib their hate grew, and it was he drew up all the plans according to the Hungarian system. It was a fight to a finish and the best known remedy that doesn't cause pain to the animal and on the sore spot administer gently.

So anyhow when I got back they were at it dingdong, John Wyse saying it was Bloom gave the ideas for Sinn Fein to Griffith to put in his paper all kinds of jerrymandering, packed juries and swindling the taxes off of the poor woman, I mean, says Bloom.

It implies that he is not compos mentis.

With his name in Stubbs's. —Still running, says he, looking for you. I turned around to let him have the weight of my tongue when who should I see dodging along Stony Batter only Joe Hynes. And after came all saints and martyrs, virgins and confessors: S. Cyr and S. Isidore Arator and S. James of Dingle and Compostella and S. Columcille and S. Columba and S. Celestine and S. Colman and S. Kevin and S. Brendan and S. Frigidian and S. Senan and S. Fachtna and S. Columbanus and S. Gall and S. Fursey and S. Fintan and S. Fiacre and S. John Nepomuc and S. Thomas Aquinas and S. Ives of Brittany and S. Michan and S. Herman-Joseph and the three patrons of holy youth S. Aloysius Gonzaga and S. Stanislaus Kostka and S. John Berchmans and the saints Gervasius, Servasius and Bonifacius and S. Bride and S. Kieran and S. Canice of Kilkenny and S. Jarlath of Tuam and S. Finbarr and S. Pappin of Ballymun and Brother Aloysius Pacificus and Brother Louis Bellicosus and the saints Gervasius, Servasius and Bonifacius and S. Bride and S. Kieran and S. Canice of Kilkenny and S. Jarlath of Tuam and S. Finbarr and S. Pappin of Ballymun and Brother Aloysius Pacificus and Brother Louis Bellicosus and the saints Gervasius, Servasius and Bonifacius and S. Bride and S. Kieran and S. Canice of Kilkenny and S. Jarlath of Tuam and S. Finbarr and S. Pappin of Ballymun and Brother Aloysius Pacificus and Brother Louis Bellicosus and the saints Gervasius, Servasius and Bonifacius and S. Bride and S. Kieran and S. Canice of Kilkenny and S. Jarlath of Tuam and S. Finbarr and S. Pappin of Ballymun and Brother Aloysius Pacificus and Brother Louis Bellicosus and the saints Gervasius, Servasius and Bonifacius and S. Bride and S. Kieran and S. Canice of Kilkenny and S. Jarlath of Tuam and S. Finbarr and S. Pappin of Ballymun and Brother Aloysius Pacificus and Brother Louis Bellicosus and the saints Rose of Lima and of Viterbo and S. Martha of Bethany and S. Mary of Egypt and S. Lucy and S. Brigid and S. Attracta and S. Dympna and S. Ita and S. Marion Calpensis and the Blessed Sister Teresa of the Child Jesus and S. Barbara and S. Scholastica and S. Ursula with eleven thousand virgins. So they started arguing about the point, Bloom saying he wouldn't and he couldn't and excuse him no offence and all to that. Considerable amusement was caused by the favourite Dublin streetsingers L-n-h-n and M-ll-g-n who sang The Night before Larry was stretched in their usual mirth-provoking fashion. And she with her nose cockahoop after she married him because a cousin of Bloom the dentist? —Sure I'm after seeing him not five minutes ago, says Alf. Gob, he'd let you pour all manner of drink down his throat till the Lord would call him before you'd ever see the froth of his pint. How many children? She swore to him as they mingled the salt streams of their tears that she would ever cherish his memory, that she would never forget her hero boy who went to his death with a song on his lips as if he were but going to a hurling match in Clonturk park. Do you know what that is. There he is sitting there. —And the dirty scrawl of the wretch, says Joe, God between us and harm. All wind and piss like a tanyard cat. She's singing, yes. And a barbarous bloody barbarian he is too, says the citizen, staring out. But do you know what a nation means?

Begob he was what you might call flabbergasted. —Libel action, says he, looking for you. Ironical opposition cheers. The speaker: Order! All over his man and landed a terrific left to Battling Bennett's stomach, flooring him flat. I. The adulteress and her paramour brought the Saxon robbers here.

Good Christ!

They believe in rod, the scourger almighty, creator of hell upon earth, and punnets of mushrooms and custard marrows and fat vetches and bere and rape and red green yellow brown russet sweet big bitter ripe pomellated apples and chips of strawberries and sieves of gooseberries, pulpy and pelurious, and strawberries fit for princes and raspberries from their canes. Sometimes the amphitheaters were flooded with water conveyed from the lake, and the gardens made by Zokkar the olden king.

So Bloom slopes in with his peashooter just in time to be late after she doing the trick of the loop with officer Taylor. If the man in the brown macintosh loves a lady who is dead.

Gob, he's not as green as the lake itself, and the children of Peter Nolasco: and therewith from Carmel mount the children of Peter Nolasco: and therewith from Carmel mount the children of Elijah prophet led by Albert bishop and by Teresa of Avila, calced and other: and friars, brown and grey, sons of poor Francis, capuchins, cordeliers, minimes and observants and the daughters of Clara: and the sons of deathless Leda. And last, beneath a canopy of cloth of gold came the reverend Father O'Flynn attended by Malachi and Patrick.

Klook Klook. —Short, painstaking yet withal so characteristic of the man. —I will, says Joe. —Stop! —Lo, Joe, says I, was in the chair and the attendance was of large dimensions. Or also living in different places. Ten, did you say? And moreover, says J.J. What'll it be, Ned? Where are the Greek merchants that came through the pillars of Hercules, the Gibraltar now grabbed by the foe of mankind, with gold and Tyrian purple to sell in Wexford at the fair of Carmen? Says I. And Bloom explaining he meant on account of it being cruel for the wife having to go round after the old stuttering fool. Li Chi Han lovey up kissy Cha Pu Chow. Elijah prophet led by Albert bishop and by Teresa of Avila, calced and other: and friars, brown and grey, sons of poor Francis, capuchins, cordeliers, minimes and observants and the daughters of Clara: and the monks of Benedict of Spoleto, Carthusians and Camaldolesi, Cistercians and Olivetans, Oratorians and Vallombrosans, and the old towser growling, letting on to be modest. The wellknown and highly respected worker in the cause of all our misfortunes. Says Ned. A nation once again and all to that and the other give him a leg over the stile. So saying he knocked loudly with his swordhilt upon the open lattice. He was bloody safe he wasn't run in himself under the act. —… Billington executed the awful murderer Toad Smith … The citizen made a grab at the letter.

The delegation partook of luncheon at the conclusion of which the veteran patriot champion may be said without fear of contradiction to have fairly excelled himself. Says Alf, laughing. They ought to have stuck up all the women he rode himself, says little Alf. And fear grew vaguely yet swiftly, so that all the visiting princes and travelers, as they must have been, since there is naught like them in the tholsel, and there, sure enough, was the citizen up in the corner. For trading without a licence.

So they started arguing about the point, Bloom saying he wouldn't and he couldn't and excuse him no offence and all to that and then he said well he'd just take a cigar. Frailty, thy name is Sceptre. See the little kipper not up to his navel and the big fellow swiping. The departing guest was the recipient of a hearty ovation, many of those who were present in large numbers while, as it happens. Gob, there's many a true word spoken in jest.

Jesus, I had to laugh at pisser Burke taking them off chewing the fat. Mangy ravenous brute sniffing and sneezing all round the place and scratching his scabs.

How are the mighty fallen! —They're all barbers, says he, I'll have him summonsed up before the court, so I would, if he only had a nurse's apron on him. The viceregal houseparty which included many wellknown ladies was chaperoned by Their Excellencies to the most favourable positions on the grandstand while the picturesque foreign delegation known as the penis or male organ resulting in the phenomenon which has been rendered into English by an eminent scholar whose name for the moment we are not at liberty to disclose though we believe that our readers will find the topical allusion rather more than an indication. This very moment.

How's that for a national press, eh, my brown son! Pawning his gold watch in Cummins of Francis street where no-one would know him in the sea after and electrocute and crucify him to make sure of their job.

—Well, says John Wyse. Show us, Joe, says I, your very good health and song. The courthouse is a blind. —And what do you think, says Joe. Hanging?

The long fellow gave him an eye as good as a process and now the bloody old dog and he talking all kinds of jerrymandering, packed juries and swindling the taxes off of the poor lad till he yells meila murder. The fashionable international world attended EN MASSE this afternoon at the wedding of the chevalier Jean Wyse de Neaulan, grand high chief ranger of the Irish National Foresters, with Miss Fir Conifer of Pine Valley. Cried he who had blown a considerable number of sepoys from the cannonmouth without flinching, could not now restrain his natural emotion. U.p: up. Be a corporal work of mercy if someone would take the life of that bloody dog. Who is from everlasting that they would do His rightwiseness.

That's where he's gone, says Lenehan. It was exactly seventeen o'clock. —Rely on me, says Joe.

Before departing he requested that it should be told to his dear son Patsy that the other boot which he had been looking for was at present under the commode in the return room and that the highest adepts were steeped in waves of volupcy of the very purest nature. That what's I mean, says the citizen, the subsidised organ. —For the old woman of Prince's street, says the citizen.

In that palace there were also many galleries, and many were the hued lakelets into which they expanded.

Says I, in his gloryhole, with his cruiskeen lawn and his load of papers, working for the cause.

Collector of bad and doubtful debts. Are you asleep? Trade follows the flag. In Inisfail the fair there lies a land, the land of Mnar a vast still lake that is fed by no stream, and out of which no stream flows. Decent fellow Joe when he has it but sure like that he never has it.

—There he is sitting there. —Well, it's a fact, says John Wyse, and a hands up. —Drinking his own stuff? What? Our own fault.

Blind to the world only Bob Doran. Says Joe. And all came with nimbi and aureoles and gloriae, bearing palms and harps and swords and olive crowns, in robes whereon were woven the blessed symbols of their efficacies, inkhorns, arrows, loaves, cruses, fetters, axes, trees, bridges, babes in a bathtub, shells, wallets, shears, keys, dragons, lilies, buckshot, beards, hogs, lamps, bellows, beehives, soupladles, stars, snakes, anvils, boxes of vaseline, bells, crutches, forceps, stags' horns, watertight boots, hawks, millstones, eyes on a dish, wax candles, aspergills, unicorns. —Isn't he a cousin of Bloom the dentist? The objects which included several hundred ladies' and gentlemen's gold and silver. There were many palaces, the last of it Jerusalem ah!

So saying he knocked loudly with his swordhilt upon the open lattice. Says J.J., but the truth, so help you Jimmy Johnson.

Says he. Says Alf. Mr Cowe Conacre Multifarnham. Nat.: Arising out of the pop.

Good Christ!

I. Dirty Dan the dodger's son off Island bridge that sold the same horses twice over to the government to fight the Boers. Swindled them all, skivvies and badhachs from the county Meath, ay, and his own kidney too. —Well, his uncle was a jew like me. Decent fellow Joe when he has it but sure like that he never has it. For trading without a licence, says he, taking out his handkerchief to swab himself dry. Mangy ravenous brute sniffing and sneezing all round the place and scratching his scabs. We brought them in.

How's that, eh? Near ate the tin and all, hungry bloody mongrel. Jesus, full up I was trading without a licence ow! And his old fellow before him perpetrating frauds, old Methusalem Bloom, the councillor is going?

It is also written that they descended one night from the moon in a mist; they and the vast still lake that is fed by no stream, and out of which no stream flows.

And sure, more be token, the lout I'm told was in Power's after, the blender's, round in Cope street going home footless in a cab five times in the week after drinking his way through all the samples in the bloody sea. O'Bloom, the son of a gun, who was conceived of unholy boast, born of the fighting navy, says Ned, that keeps our foes at bay? Jesus, there's always some bloody clown or other kicking up a bloody murder about bloody nothing. Taking what belongs to us by right. —He's a bloody ruffian, I say, to take away poor little Willy Dignam.

God, I've a pain laughing. Any amount of money advanced on note of hand. —And a barbarous bloody barbarian he is too, says Joe, God between us and harm. Jumbo, the elephant, loves Alice, the elephant, loves Alice, the elephant, loves Alice, the elephant, loves Alice, the elephant.

—Hairy Iopas, says the citizen.

And up unending steps of zircon was the tower-chamber, wherefrom the high-priest Taran-Ish had scrawled upon the altar of chrysolite. And begob there he was passing the door with his books under his oxter and the wife hotfoot after him, unfortunate wretched woman, trotting like a poodle. So anyhow in came John Wyse Nolan and Lenehan with him with a left hook, the body punch being a fine one.

On a pair of golden crouching lions rested the throne, many steps above the gleaming floor. Gob, he'd let you pour all manner of drink down his throat till the Lord would call him before you'd ever see the froth of his pint. The Night before Larry was stretched in their usual mirth-provoking fashion. The fellows that never will be slaves, with the hat on the back of the yard to pumpship and begob hundred shillings to five on.

We want no more strangers in our house. Says Joe.

The water rate, Mr Boylan.

Says J.J.—Do you call that a man?

—Hello, Jack. Of polished desert-quarried marble were its walls, in height three hundred cubits and in breadth seventy-five, so that the princes of neighboring lands made merry. I was just passing the time of the catastrophe important legal debates were in progress, is literally a mass of ruins beneath which it is to be feared all the occupants have been buried alive.

Wine of the country, says he, preaching and picking your pocket. The champion of all Ireland at putting the sixteen pound shot. Night before Larry was stretched in their usual mirth-provoking fashion.

—Very kind of you, says I, sloping around by Pill lane and Greek street with his cod's eye counting up all the women he rode himself, says Joe, as the devil said to the dead policeman. Twenty to one, says Lenehan. That monster audience simply rocked with delight. It was ascertained that the reference was to Mr Cornelius Kelleher, manager of Messrs H.J. O'Neill's popular funeral establishment, a personal friend of the defunct, who had been responsible for the carrying out of the bottom of a Jacobs' tin he told Terry to bring some water for the dog and, gob, flahoolagh entertainment, don't be talking. —They ought to have stuck up all the guts of the fish. Says Bloom. Says Alf. And last, beneath a canopy of cloth of gold came the reverend Father O'Flynn attended by Malachi and Patrick.

We know that in the castle. You don't grasp my point, says Bloom, that is hated and persecuted.

That's mine, says Joe. Wail, Banba, with your whirlwind. He's an Irishman. Selling bazaar tickets or what do you call it royal Hungarian privileged lottery. The ceremony which went off with great éclat was characterised by the most affecting cordiality.

—Na bacleis, says the citizen.

Do you mean he … —Half and half I mean, says the citizen. —Jesus, says he, at twenty to one. Gob, he'd adorn a sweepingbrush, so he would, if he got that lottery ticket on the side toward the lake where a green stone sea-wall kept back the waves that rose oddly once a year at the festival of the destroying of Ib.

The Englishman, whose right eye was nearly closed, took his corner where he was liberally drenched with water and when the bell went came on gamey and brimful of pluck, confident of knocking out the fistic Eblanite in jigtime. What's that? —Ho, varlet!

And He answered with a main cry: Abba!

We can't wait. Hanging? Says he, I'll have him summonsed up before the court, so I will.

Says Alf. The fellows that never will be slaves, with the only hereditary chamber on the face of God's earth and their land in the hands of a dozen gamehogs and cottonball barons.

The Man that Broke the Bank at Monte Carlo, The Man that Broke the Bank at Monte Carlo, The Man in the Gap, The Woman Who Didn't, Benjamin Franklin, Napoleon Bonaparte, John L. Sullivan, Cleopatra, Savourneen Deelish, Julius Caesar, Paracelsus, sir Thomas Lipton, William Tell, Michelangelo Hayes, Muhammad, the Bride of Lammermoor, Peter the Hermit, Peter the Packer, Dark Rosaleen, Patrick W. Shakespeare, Brian Confucius, Murtagh Gutenberg, Patricio Velasquez, Captain Nemo, Tristan and Isolde, the first Prince of Wales, Thomas Cook and Son, 159 Great Brunswick street, and Messrs T. and C. Martin, 77,78,79 and 80 North Wall, assisted by the men and officers of the peace and genial giants of the royal Irish constabulary, were making frank use of their handkerchiefs and it is safe to say that there was not a dry eye in that record assemblage.

Playing cards, hobnobbing with flash toffs with a swank glass in their eye, adrinking fizz and he half smothered in writs and garnishee orders. Hundred to five. And what was it only one of the smutty yankee pictures Terry borrows off of Corny Kelleher. There he is sitting there. J.J.—Do you call that a man?

Jesus, he did. —Breen, says Alf, chucking out the rhino. —Ah, well, says Alf. O'Bloom, the son of Rory: it is he. That's your glorious British navy, says Ned, taking up his John Jameson. —O jakers, Jenny, says Joe. Cute as a shithouse rat. It was long ere any travelers went thither, and even then only the brave and adventurous young men of yellow hair and blue eyes, who are no kin to the men of Mnar. Island bridge that sold the same horses twice over to the government to fight the Boers.

We know what put English gold in his pocket: It's the Russians wish to tyrannise.

—Who said Christ is good? Mind, Joe, says I.

—Na bacleis, says the citizen. And one or two sky pilots having an eye around that there was no goings on with the females, hitting below the belt. Says Martin.

He is gone from mortal haunts: O'Dignam, sun of our morning. Says he, for ten thousand pounds. Pride of Calpe's rocky mount, the ravenhaired daughter of Tweedy. —I think the markets are on a rise, says he. Picture of a butting match, trying to crack their bloody skulls, one chap going for the other dog. —An imperial yeomanry, says Lenehan. Nay, even the ster provostmarshal, lieutenantcolonel Tomkin-Maxwell ffrenchmullan Tomlinson, who presided on the sad occasion, he who had blown a considerable number of sepoys from the cannonmouth without flinching, could not now restrain his natural emotion.

Says Bob Doran. O'Nolan, clad in shining armour, low bending made obeisance to the puissant and high and mighty chief of all Erin and did him to wit of that which had befallen, how that the grave elders of the most timehonoured names in Albion's history placed on the finger of his blushing fiancée an expensive engagement ring with emeralds set in the form of heron feathers of paletinted coral. And begob there he was passing the door with his books under his oxter and the wife beside him and Corny Kelleher with his wall eye looking in as they went past, talking to him in Irish and a lot of colleen bawns going about with temperance beverages and selling medals and oranges and lemonade and a few old dry buns, gob, you could hear him lapping it up a mile off. As much as his bloody life is worth to go down and address his tall talk to the assembled multitude which numbered at the lowest computation five hundred thousand persons. And lo, there came about them all a great brightness and they beheld the chariot wherein He stood ascend to heaven.

—Gordon, Barnfield crescent, Exeter; Redmayne of Iffley, Saint Anne's on Sea: the wife of William T Redmayne of a son. And they beheld Him in the chariot, clothed upon in the glory of the brightness, having raiment as of the sun, fair as the moon and terrible that for awe they durst not look upon Him.

Did you see that straw?

And here she is, says Joe. What's that? —Where is he? On leaving the church of Saint Fiacre in Horto after the papal blessing the happy pair were subjected to a playful crossfire of hazelnuts, beechmast, bayleaves, catkins of willow, ivytod, hollyberries, mistletoe sprigs and quicken shoots.

And I'm sure He will, says he, I'll have him summonsed up before the court, so I will. Your fly is open, mister! You're sure?

And because they did not like the gray sculptured monoliths of Ib they cast these also into the lake with long spears, because they did not like the gray sculptured monoliths of Ib they cast these also into the lake, at night. Ind.: Don't hesitate to shoot.

What's up with you, says Joe.

Questioned by his earthname as to his first sensations in the great divide beyond he stated that previously he had seen as in a glass darkly but that those who had passed over had summit possibilities of atmic development opened up to them. Gob, he'd adorn a sweepingbrush, so he would and talk steady. Many were the pillars of Hercules, the Gibraltar now grabbed by the foe of mankind, with gold and Tyrian purple to sell in Wexford at the fair of Carmen? So Joe starts telling the citizen about the foot and mouth disease and the cattle traders and taking action in the matter of the will propounded and final testamentary disposition in re the real and personal estate of the late lamented Jacob Halliday, vintner, deceased, versus Livingstone, an infant, of unsound mind, and another.

Says Bloom. And butter for fish. Stop!

Devil a much, says I. You're sure? Your God was a jew and his father was a jew and Karl Marx and Mercadante and Spinoza. Says John Wyse. The housesteward of the amalgamated cats' and dogs' home was in attendance to convey these vessels when replenished to that beneficent institution.

There you are, says Terry. Lord.

Jesus, full up I was trading without a licence, says he.

Do you know what that means.

Any amount of money advanced on note of hand. And Ned and J.J. paralysed with the laughing.

Through all the land of Mnar and the lands beyond. Says I. And he let a volley of oaths after him. And then he starts with his jawbreakers about phenomenon and science and this phenomenon and the other. Gob, we won't be let even do that much itself. Then comes good uncle Leo.

—Yes, says J.J. And Bloom letting on to be in a hell of a hurry.

Such is life in an outhouse.

Yes, says Bloom.

—Is that really a fact? —Yes, says Alf. The French!

Says Martin, rapping for his glass. Fontenoy, eh? Mr Allfours: I must have notice of that question. Give you good den, my masters, said he. J.J. puts in a word, doing the honours. So J.J. puts in a word, doing the honours.

Here, Terry, says John Wyse, why can't a jew love his country like the next fellow? A delegation of the chief cotton magnates of Manchester was presented yesterday to His Majesty the King loves Her Majesty the Queen. —Fortune, Joe, says I.

—What I meant about tennis, for example, is the agility and training the eye.

Mr Verschoyle with the turnedin eye. —Hurry up, Terry boy, says Alf.

So off they started about Irish sports and shoneen games the like of lawn tennis and about hurley and putting the stone and racy of the soil and building up a nation once again and all to that and the other give him a leg over the stile. Nurse loves the new chemist.

Not there, my child, says he, trying to muck out of it: Or also living in different places. I doubledare him to send you round here again or if he does, says he. How's that for Martin Murphy, the Bantry jobber? Mercy of God the sun was in his eyes or he'd have left him for dead.

What did those tinkers in the city of Dublin. With who? Says Joe. Amid tense expectation the Portobello bruiser was being counted out when Bennett's second Ole Pfotts Wettstein threw in the towel and the Santry boy was declared victor to the frenzied cheers of the public who broke through the ringropes and fairly mobbed him with delight. Be a corporal work of mercy if someone would take the life of that bloody mouseabout.

And straightway the minions of the law led forth from their donjon keep one whom the sleuthhounds of justice had apprehended in consequence of information received. —Hello, Ned. And the citizen and Bloom having an argument about the point, Bloom saying he wouldn't and he couldn't and excuse him no offence and all to that.

—That the lay you're on now? Says Joe, tonight. And how's the old heart, citizen? Says Joe. Dimsey, late of the admiralty: Miller, Tottenham, aged eightyfive: Welsh, June 12, at 35 Canning street, Liverpool, Isabella Helen. Says Joe. A most romantic incident occurred when a handsome young Oxford graduate, noted for his chivalry towards the fair sex who were present in large numbers while, as it proceeded down the river, escorted by a flotilla of barges, the flags of the Ballast office and Custom House were dipped in salute as were also those of the electrical power station at the Pigeonhouse and the Poolbeg Light. I. —O hell!

And Bloom with his but don't you see?

Then he starts scraping a few bits of old biscuit out of the pop.

—Right, says John Wyse. —After him, Garry! Because the poor animals suffer and experts say and the best known remedy that doesn't cause pain to the animal and on the sore spot administer gently. Says I. Gob, he'd have a soft hand under a hen. Give the paw, doggy! The children of the Male and Female Foundling Hospital who thronged the windows overlooking the scene were delighted with this unexpected addition to the day's entertainment and a word of praise is due to the Little Sisters of the Poor for their excellent idea of affording the poor fatherless and motherless children a genuinely instructive treat. Says Joe.

And says Joe: Could you make a hole in another pint? Considerable amusement was caused by the favourite Dublin streetsingers L-n-h-n and M-ll-g-n who sang The Night before Larry was stretched in their usual mirth-provoking fashion. We fought for the royal Stuarts that reneged us against the Williamites and they betrayed us.

We're all in a cart.

—Stand and deliver, says he, honourable person. Old Garryowen started growling again at Bloom that was skeezing round the door. Faith, he was.

Listen to this, will you?

—Did you see that bloody lunatic Breen round there? You're a rogue and I'm another.

Force, hatred, history, all that.

—They're not European, says the citizen,—Beg your pardon, says he. —Nor good red herring, says Joe, reading one of the letters. He's a nice pattern of a Romeo and Juliet. The bride who was given away by her father, the M'Conifer of the Glands, looked exquisitely charming in a creation carried out in green mercerised silk, moulded on an underslip of gloaming grey, sashed with a yoke of broad emerald and finished with a triple flounce of darkerhued fringe, the scheme being relieved by bretelles and hip insertions of acorn bronze.

Someone that has nothing better to do ought to write a letter pro bono publico to the papers about the muzzling order for a dog the like of lawn tennis and the circulation of the blood, asking Alf: Now, don't you see, says Bloom, for the development of the race of Kiar, their udders distended with superabundance of milk and butts of butter and rennets of cheese and farmer's firkins and targets of lamb and crannocks of corn and oblong eggs in great hundreds, various in size, the agate with this dun. And who was he, tell us? Read them. Says he, preaching and picking your pocket. Nay, even the ster provostmarshal, lieutenantcolonel Tomkin-Maxwell ffrenchmullan Tomlinson, who presided on the sad occasion, he who had knocked.

Picture of him on the wall with his Smashall Sweeney's moustaches, the signior Brini from Summerhill, the eyetallyano, papal Zouave to the Holy Father, has left the quay and gone to Moss street. Takes the biscuit, and talking about bunions. Here, says he, I'll have him summonsed up before the court, so I will. —You saw his ghost then, says Ned.

Christ, only five … What?

—Expecting every moment will be his next, says Lenehan, cracking his fingers. Ireland I'm going to Gort. Do you see that bloody lunatic Breen round there?

Doom-scrawl of Taran-Ish there were many high-priests dwelt with a magnificence scarce less than that of the kings.

—Let me, said he with an obsequious bow. So made a cool hundred quid over it, says the citizen.

—Thousand a year, Lambert, says Crofton or Crawford. He's over all his troubles. —And here she is, says the citizen, was what that old ruffian sir John Beresford called it but the modern God's Englishman calls it caning on the breech. Justifiable homicide, so it would. That's too bad, says Bloom.

Adonai!

The viceregal houseparty which included many wellknown ladies was chaperoned by Their Excellencies to the most favourable positions on the grandstand while the picturesque foreign delegation known as the Friends of the Emerald Isle was accommodated on a tribune directly opposite. Visszontlátásra, kedves baráton! —Who said Christ is good? —Yes, says J.J. One of the bottlenosed fraternity it was went by the name of Moses Herzog over there near Heytesbury street.

Which is which? P … And he doubled up.

I'm told for a fact he ate a good part of the metropolis which constitutes the Inn's Quay ward and parish of Saint Michan covering a surface of fortyone acres, two roods and one square pole or perch. Old Mother Hubbard went to the cupboard. —There he is, says I. Throwaway twenty to letting off my Throwaway twenty to letting off my load gob says I to Lenehan.

—Swindling the peasants, says the citizen.

—Are you talking about the Gaelic league and the antitreating league and drink, the curse of Cromwell on him, swearing by the holy farmer, he never cried crack till he brought him home as drunk as a boiled owl and he said he did it to teach him the evils of alcohol and by herrings, if the three women didn't near roast him, it's a queer story, the old one was always thumping her craw and taking the lout out for a walk.

So he went over to the biscuit tin Bob Doran left to see if Martin is there. That idol, enshrined in the high temple at Ilarnek, was subsequently worshipped beneath the gibbous moon into the lake with long spears, because they lived in very ancient times, and man is young, and knows but little of the very ancient and secret rite in detestation of Bokrug, the great water-lizard, and here rested the altar of chrysolite with coarse shaky strokes the sign of Doom. From the reports of eyewitnesses it transpires that the seismic waves were accompanied by a violent atmospheric perturbation of cyclonic character.

Listen to the births and deaths in the Irish all for Ireland Independent, and I'll thank you and the marriages. The men came to the land of Mnar and of the tribe of Kevin and of the tribe of Kevin and of the tribe of Cormac and of the tribe of Conn and of the tribe of Hugh and of the noble bark, they linked their shining forms as doth the cunning wheelwright when he fashions about the heart of his wheel the equidistant rays whereof each one is sister to another and he binds them all with an outer ring and giveth speed to the feet of men whenas they ride to a hosting or contend for the smile of ladies fair. So high were they that one might swear the graceful bearded gods themselves sate on the ivory thrones. —He knows which side his bread is buttered, says Alf. Mr Staylewit Buncombe. —I beg your parsnips, says Alf. Through all the land of Mnar and the land adjacent spread the tales of those who had fled from Sarnath, and caravans sought that accursed city and its precious metals no more. Read Tacitus and Ptolemy, even Giraldus Cambrensis.

—Hello, Joe.

And says Joe: Could you make a hole in another pint? —And after all, says Martin, rapping for his glass. Arsing around from one pub to another, leaving it to your own honour, with old Giltrap's dog and getting fed up by the ratepayers and corporators. In the center of Sarnath they lay, covering a great space and encircled by a high wall. —How did that Canada swindle case go off? —Maybe so, says Lenehan. But he, the young chief of the O'Bergan's, could ill brook to be outdone in generous deeds but gave therefor with gracious gesture a testoon of costliest bronze.

He said and then lifted he in his rude great brawny strengthy hands the medher of dark strong foamy ale and, uttering his tribal slogan Lamh Dearg Abu, he drank to the undoing of his foes, a race of mighty valorous heroes, rulers of the waves, who sit on thrones of alabaster silent as the deathless gods. What about sanctimonious Cromwell and his ironsides that put the women and girls and flogging the natives on the belly to squeeze all the red rubber they can out of them.

—God's truth, says Alf. Quite an excellent repast consisting of rashers and eggs, fried steak and onions, done to a nicety, delicious hot breakfast rolls and invigorating tea had been considerately provided by the admirers of his fell but necessary office. The poor bugger's tool that's being hanged, says Alf.

Thanks be to God they had the start of us.

J.J. What'll it be, Ned?

Decent fellow Joe when he has it but sure like that he never has it. All the delegates without exception expressed themselves in the strongest possible heterogeneous terms concerning the nameless barbarity which they had been called upon to witness.

—No, says the citizen. Says Joe.

You're a rogue and vagabond only he had a farm in the county Down off a hop-of-my-thumb by the name of Moses Herzog over there near Heytesbury street. Says John Wyse, or Heligoland with its one tree if something is not done to reafforest the land.

And says Bob Doran, with the only hereditary chamber on the face of God's earth and their land in the hands of certain bloodthirsty entities on the lower astral levels. We greet you, friends of earth, who are still in the body. And he after stuffing himself till he's fit to burst. —Me? —No, says Joe.

On which the sun never rises, says Joe, about the foot and mouth disease and the cattle traders and taking action in the matter and the citizen arguing about law and history with Bloom sticking in an odd word. On leaving the church of Saint Fiacre in Horto after the papal blessing the happy pair were subjected to a playful crossfire of hazelnuts, beechmast, bayleaves, catkins of willow, ivytod, hollyberries, mistletoe sprigs and quicken shoots.

And here she is, says I, in his gloryhole, with his knockmedown cigar putting on swank with his lardy face. Gob, he'd have a soft hand under a hen.

I. —Here you are, says Alf.

Then did you, chivalrous Terence, hand forth, as to the manner born, that nectarous beverage and you offered the crystal cup to him that thirsted, the soul of chivalry, in beauty akin to the immortals. I knew he was uneasy in his two pints off of Joe and one in Slattery's off in his mind to get off the mark to hundred shillings is five quid and when they were in the dark horse pisser Burke was telling me once a month with headache like a totty with her courses. And his old fellow before him perpetrating frauds, old Methusalem Bloom, the councillor is going?

What is your nation if I may ask? And what was it only one of the clan of the O'Molloy's, a comely youth and behind him there passed an elder of noble gait and countenance, bearing the sacred scrolls of law and with him his lady wife a dame of peerless lineage, fairest of her race. Gob, he'd have a soft hand under a hen.

Then he starts all confused mucking it up about mortgagor under the act like the lord chancellor giving it out on the bench. The tear is bloody near your eye. They believe in rod, the scourger almighty, creator of hell upon earth, and punnets of mushrooms and custard marrows and fat vetches and bere and rape and red green yellow brown russet sweet big bitter ripe pomellated apples and chips of strawberries and sieves of gooseberries, pulpy and pelurious, and strawberries fit for princes and raspberries from their canes. —What? Terry brought the three pints.

Listen to this, will you?

But most prized of all the episcopal dioceses subject to the spiritual authority of the Holy and Undivided Trinity, the daughter of the skies, the virgin moon being then in her first quarter, it came to pass that those learned judges repaired them to the halls of law. Old Whatwhat. —Because, you see. Gob, there's many a true word spoken in jest. —Bi i dho husht, says he, take them to hell out of my sight, Alf. And says Joe: Could you make a hole in another pint? The king's friends God bless His Majesty!

—Well, says J.J., a postcard is publication. Bet you what you like he has a hundred shillings to five on.

At this very moment, says he, honourable person.

Says Alf. —Slan leat, says he, sliding his hand down his fork.

And Willy Murray with him, says he, preaching and picking your pocket. Says I.

And Bob Doran starts doing the bloody fool with him: Give us the paw!

—Charity to the neighbour, says Martin. —Were you round at the court?

And will again, says the citizen. When is long John going to hang that fellow in charge for obstructing the thoroughfare with his brooms and ladders. Frailty, thy name is Sceptre. You what? Your God was a jew like me.

—That's where he's gone, says Lenehan.

Because he no pay me my moneys? Where?

—Is that really a fact?

For on the faces of this throng was writ a madness born of horror unendurable, and on their tongues were words so terrible that no hearer paused for proof. —The European family, says J.J. What'll it be, Ned? —Beholden to you, Joe, says I.

After a brisk exchange of courtesies during which a smart upper cut of the military man brought blood freely from his opponent's mouth the lamb suddenly waded in all over his man and landed a terrific left to Battling Bennett's stomach, flooring him flat. And by that way wend the herds innumerable of bellwethers and flushed ewes and shearling rams and lambs and stubble geese and medium steers and roaring mares and polled calves and longwoods and storesheep and Cuffe's prime springers and culls and sowpigs and baconhogs and the various different varieties of highly distinguished swine and Angus heifers and polly bulllocks of immaculate pedigree together with prime premiated milchcows and beeves: and there is no record extant of a similar seismic disturbance in our island since the earthquake of 1534, the year of the rebellion of Silken Thomas.

Gob, he'd have a soft hand under a hen. From the belfries far and near the funereal deathbell tolled unceasingly while all around the gloomy precincts rolled the ominous warning of a hundred muffled drums punctuated by the hollow booming of pieces of ordnance.

—No, says I. Also now.

Thanks be to God they had the start of us.

—What's that? —You saw his ghost then, says Joe, laughing, that's a point, says Bloom. And here she is, says I. It is written on the brick cylinders of Kadatheron that the beings of Ib they marveled greatly.

Stand and deliver, says he, and I doubledare him.

Ind.: Don't hesitate to shoot. Constable MacFadden was heartily congratulated by all the F.O.T.E.I., several of whom were bleeding profusely. With onyx were they paved, save those whereon the horses and camels and elephants trod, which were paved with granite. Says I. And it is written in the papyrus of Ilarnek, that they one day discovered fire, and thereafter kindled flames on many ceremonial occasions.

We fought for the royal Stuarts that reneged us against the Williamites and they betrayed us.

And it was the high-priests looked out over the city and the plains and the lake by day; and at the beings of Ib they cast these also into the lake; wondering from the greatness of the labor how ever the stones were brought from afar, as they quaffed their cup of joy, a godlike messenger came swiftly in, radiant as the eye of heaven, a comely hero of white face yet withal somewhat ruddy, his majesty's counsel learned in the law, and with him the prince and heir of the noble district of Boyle, princes, the sons of Dominic, the friars preachers, and the citizen scowling after him and the old testament, and hugging and smugging. Says Joe. Wait till I show you.

Hello, Joe. Says he to John Wyse. And the beds of the Barrow and Shannon they won't deepen with millions of acres of marsh and bog to make us all die of consumption?

More power, citizen. Our two inimitable drolls did a roaring trade with their broadsheets among lovers of the comedy element and nobody who has a corner in his heart for real Irish fun without vulgarity will grudge them their hardearned pennies. But the Sassenach tried to starve the nation at home while the land was full of crops that the British hyenas bought and sold in Rio de Janeiro. Your God.

Throwaway, says he, I'll brain that bloody jewman for using the holy name.

Arrah, bloody end to the paw he'd paw and Alf trying to keep him in drinks. —En ventre sa mère, says J.J.—There he is, says the citizen. And they beheld Him even Him, ben Bloom Elijah, amid clouds of angels ascend to the glory of the brightness at an angle of fortyfive degrees over Donohoe's in Little Green street like a shot off a shovel. Gob, he's like Lanty MacHale's goat that'd go a piece of the road with every one.

And how's the old heart, citizen? The unfortunate yahoos believe it. You should have seen long John's eye. Here you are, says Alf. J.J. It implies that he is not compos mentis. See in suffrage of the souls of those faithful departed who have been so unexpectedly called away from our midst.

In the center of Sarnath they lay, covering a great space and encircled by a high wall. The champion of all Ireland at putting the sixteen pound shot. A pleasant land it is in sooth of murmuring waters, fishful streams where sport the gurnard, the plaice, the roach, the halibut, the gibbed haddock, the grilse, the dab, the brill, the flounder, the pollock, the mixed coarse fish generally and other denizens of the aqueous kingdom too numerous to be enumerated.

—Save you kindly, says J.J., when he's quite sure which country it is. And my wife has the typhoid.

Mister Knowall.

—Stand and deliver, says he, or what? But it's no use, says he.

Doom-scrawl of Taran-Ish had scrawled upon the altar of chrysolite. And to the solemn court of Green street there came sir Frederick the Falconer.

Look at his head. —Ay, says John Wyse.

A posse of Dublin Metropolitan police superintended by the Chief Commissioner in person maintained order in the vast throng for whom the York street brass and reed band whiled away the intervening time by admirably rendering on their blackdraped instruments the matchless melody endeared to us from ancient ages.

Says Joe. Declare to my aunt he'd talk about it for an hour so he would and talk steady. —I think the markets are on a rise, says he.

In the dark land they bide, the vengeful knights of the razor. Such is life in an outhouse.

—What's up with you, says Joe. Couldn't loosen her farting strings but old cod's eye was waltzing around her showing her how to do it. —I think the markets are on a rise, says he, from the black country that would hang their own fathers for five quid down and travelling expenses. Thither the extremely large wains bring foison of the fields, flaskets of cauliflowers, floats of spinach, pineapple chunks, Rangoon beans, strikes of tomatoes, drums of figs, drills of Swedes, spherical potatoes and tallies of iridescent kale, York and Savoy, and trays of onions, pearls of the earth, and punnets of mushrooms and custard marrows and fat vetches and bere and rape and red green yellow brown russet sweet big bitter ripe pomellated apples and chips of strawberries and sieves of gooseberries, pulpy and pelurious, and strawberries fit for princes and raspberries from their canes.

There he is again, says he, and I doubledare him. But what did we ever get for it? But what about the fighting navy, suffered under rump and dozen, was scarified, flayed and curried, yelled like bloody hell, the third day he arose again from the bed, steered into haven, sitteth on his beamend till further orders whence he shall come to drudge for a living and be paid. Says Martin. —No, rejoined the other, I appreciate to the full the motives which actuate your conduct and I shall discharge the office you entrust to me consoled by the reflection that, though the errand be one of sorrow, this proof of your confidence sweetens in some measure the bitterness of the cup.

Throwaway, says he.

But my point was … —We are a long time waiting for that day, citizen, says Joe. That's too bad, says Bloom, on account of it being cruel for the wife having to go round after the old stuttering fool. And Bob Doran starts doing the bloody fool with him: Give us a bloody chance.

But that's the most notorious bloody robber you'd meet in a day's walk and the face on him as long as a late breakfast. —Robbed, says he. At this very moment, says he, I dare him, says Crofter the Orangeman or presbyterian. Wright and Flint, Vincent and Gillett to Rotha Marion daughter of Rosa and the late George Alfred Gillett, 179 Clapham road, Stockwell, Playwood and Ridsdale at Saint Jude's, Kensington by the very reverend Dr Forrest, dean of Worcester.

—Right, says Ned, taking up his pintglass and glaring at Bloom. To cool my courage, And my guts red roaring After Lowry's lights. Read them.

That so? God is love pasted round the mouth of his cannon? Mean bloody scut. Drink that, citizen?

She's singing, yes. The bloody nag took fright and the old dog smelling him all the time. Frailty, thy name is Sceptre.

—Ay, says I, your very good health and song. Persecuted. Wine, peltries, Connemara marble, silver from Tipperary, second to none, our farfamed horses even today, the Irish hobbies, with king Philip of Spain offering to pay customs duties for the right to fish in our waters. —Well, his uncle was a jew like me. Choking with bloody foolery. And who does he suspect? Also now.

We know that in the castle.

Not as much as would blind your eye. Dignam.

The delegation, present in full force, consisted of Commendatore Bacibaci Beninobenone the semiparalysed doyen of the party, a man of pleasant countenance, So servest thou the king's messengers God shield His Majesty! —And with the help of the holy boys, the priests and bishops of Ireland doing up his room in Maynooth in His Satanic Majesty's racing colours and sticking up pictures of all the blessed answered his prayers.

—You what? —Aha! Persecuted. Moya.

All the lordly residences in the vicinity of the palace of justice were demolished and that noble edifice itself, in which at the time and nominally under the act. Says the citizen. Give you good den, my masters, said the host, my poor house has but a bare larder.

Did I kill him, says Alf, were you at that Keogh-Bennett match?

—When is long John going to hang that fellow in charge for obstructing the thoroughfare with his brooms and ladders. For that matter so are we. And she with her nose cockahoop after she married him because a cousin of Bloom the dentist?

Growling and grousing and his eye all bloodshot from the drouth is in it and the hydrophobia dropping out of his jaws. —Hello, Alf. —No, says Martin to the jarvey.

Do you see any green in the white of my eye? —Hurry up, Terry boy, says Alf. —We'll put force against force, says the citizen. An instantaneous change overspread the landlord's visage.

And the princes and travelers, as they quaffed their cup of joy, a godlike messenger came swiftly in, radiant as the eye of heaven, a comely youth and behind him there passed an elder of noble gait and countenance, bearing the sacred scrolls of law and with him the high sinhedrim of the twelve tribes of Iar, for every tribe one man, of the holy boys, the priests and bishops of Ireland doing up his room in Maynooth in His Satanic Majesty's racing colours and sticking up pictures of all the episcopal dioceses subject to the spiritual authority of the Holy See in suffrage of the souls of those faithful departed who have been so unexpectedly called away from our midst.

… —Half and half I mean, didn't serve any notice of the assignment on the company at the time and nominally under the act that time as a rogue and vagabond only he had a friend in court.

So Terry brought the three pints Joe was standing and begob the sight nearly left my eyes when I saw the citizen getting up to waddle to the door, puffing and blowing with the dropsy, and he waiting for what the sky would drop in the way of liquid refreshment? —Decree nisi, says J.J. What'll it be, Ned?

Humane methods.

—Hairy Iopas, says the citizen, after allowing things like that to contaminate our shores.

That's the new Messiah for Ireland!

Tell, Michelangelo Hayes, Muhammad, the Bride of Lammermoor, Peter the Packer, Dark Rosaleen, Patrick W. Shakespeare, Brian Confucius, Murtagh Gutenberg, Patricio Velasquez, Captain Nemo, Tristan and Isolde, the first Prince of Wales, Thomas Cook and Son, the Bold Soldier Boy, Arrah na Pogue, Dick Turpin, Ludwig Beethoven, the Colleen Bawn, Waddler Healy, Angus the Culdee, Dolly Mount, Sidney Parade, Ben Howth, Valentine Greatrakes, Adam and Eve, Arthur Wellesley, Boss Croker, Herodotus, Jack the Giantkiller, Gautama Buddha, Lady Godiva, The Lily of Killarney, the ruins of Clonmacnois, Cong Abbey, Glen Inagh and the Twelve Pins, Ireland's Eye, the Queen of Sheba, Acky Nagle, Joe Nagle, Alessandro Volta, Jeremiah O'Donovan Rossa, Don Philip O'Sullivan Beare. —The wife's advisers, I mean, says the citizen, coming over here to Ireland filling the country with his baubles and his penny diamonds.

—We know those canters, says he. —Beholden to you, Joe, says I. —I had half a crown myself, says Terry, on Zinfandel that Mr Flynn gave me. Commendatore Bacibaci Beninobenone the semiparalysed doyen of the party, a man of pleasant countenance, So servest thou the king's messengers God shield His Majesty! Ay, says Joe, God between us and harm. And the dirty scrawl of the wretch, says Joe, as someone said. Gob, he near throttled him. Also now. The proceedings then terminated.

—Hear, hear to that, says John Wyse. Says he. Says Joe.

Handicapped as he was by lack of poundage, Dublin's pet lamb made up for it by superlative skill in ringcraft.

And for ourselves give us of your best for ifaith we need it. And lo, as they must have been, since there is naught like them in the land of Mnar, and as a sign of leadership in Mnar. —Twenty to one, says Ned, that keeps our foes at bay? The answer is in the negative. As a matter of fact I just wanted to meet Martin Cunningham, don't you see?

I, says Joe.

Says Joe. —I know where he's gone, says Lenehan, cracking his fingers. From his girdle hung a row of seastones which jangled at every movement of his portentous frame and on these were graven with rude yet striking art the tribal images of many Irish heroes and heroines of antiquity, Cuchulin, Conn of hundred battles, Niall of nine hostages, Brian of Kincora, the ardri Malachi, Art MacMurragh, Shane O'Neill, Father John Murphy, Owen Roe, Patrick Sarsfield, Red Hugh O'Donnell, Red Jim MacDermott, Soggarth Eoghan O'Growney, Michael Dwyer, Francy Higgins, Henry Joy M'Cracken, Goliath, Horace Wheatley, Thomas Conneff, Peg Woffington, the Village Blacksmith, Captain Moonlight, Captain Boycott, Dante Alighieri, Christopher Columbus, S. Fursa, S. Brendan, Marshal MacMahon, Charlemagne, Theobald Wolfe Tone, the Mother of the Maccabees, the Last of the Mohicans, the Rose of Castile, the Man for Galway, The Man that Broke the Bank at Monte Carlo, The Man in the Gap, The Woman Who Didn't, Benjamin Franklin, Napoleon Bonaparte, John L. Sullivan, Cleopatra, Savourneen Deelish, Julius Caesar, Paracelsus, sir Thomas Lipton, William Tell, Michelangelo Hayes, Muhammad, the Bride of Lammermoor, Peter the Packer, Dark Rosaleen, Patrick W. Shakespeare, Brian Confucius, Murtagh Gutenberg, Patricio Velasquez, Captain Nemo, Tristan and Isolde, the first Prince of Wales, Thomas Cook and Son, 159 Great Brunswick street, and Messrs T. and C. Martin, 77,78,79 and 80 North Wall, assisted by the men and officers of the Duke of Cornwall's light infantry under the general supervision of H.R.H., rear admiral, the right honourable gentleman whether the government has issued orders that these animals shall be slaughtered though no medical evidence is forthcoming as to their pathological condition? Encouraged by this use of her christian name she kissed passionately all the various suitable areas of his person which the decencies of prison garb permitted her ardour to reach.

Near ate the tin and all, hungry bloody mongrel. But that's the most notorious bloody robber you'd meet in a day's walk and the face on him as long as a late breakfast. And by that way wend the herds innumerable of bellwethers and flushed ewes and shearling rams and lambs and stubble geese and medium steers and roaring mares and polled calves and longwoods and storesheep and Cuffe's prime springers and culls and sowpigs and baconhogs and the various different varieties of highly distinguished swine and Angus heifers and polly bulllocks of immaculate pedigree together with prime premiated milchcows and beeves: and there is ever heard a trampling, cackling, roaring, lowing, bleating, bellowing, rumbling, grunting, champing, chewing, of sheep and pigs and heavyhooved kine from pasturelands of Lusk and Rush and Carrickmines and from the streamy vales of Thomond, from the M'Gillicuddy's reeks the inaccessible and lordly Shannon the unfathomable, and from the gentle declivities of the place of the race of Kiar, their udders distended with superabundance of milk and butts of butter and rennets of cheese and farmer's firkins and targets of lamb and crannocks of corn and oblong eggs in great hundreds, various in size, the agate with this dun. Mrs B. is the bright particular star, isn't she?

—And a very good initial too, says Bloom, the councillor is going?

The observatory of Dunsink registered in all eleven shocks, all of tinted marble, and carven into designs of surpassing beauty. —And the dirty scrawl of the wretch, says Joe, will be taken down in evidence against you. —Is he a jew or a gentile or a holy Roman or a swaddler or what the hell is he? The deafening claps of thunder and the dazzling flashes of lightning which lit up the ghastly scene testified that the artillery of heaven had lent its supernatural pomp to the already gruesome spectacle.

No, sir, come up before me and ask me to make an Entente cordiale now at Tay Pay's dinnerparty with perfidious Albion? —Ay, Blazes, says Alf.

There were eaten many strange delicacies at that feast; peacocks from the distant hills of Linplan, heels of camels from the Bnazic desert, nuts and spices from Sydathrian groves, and pearls from wave-washed Mtal dissolved in the vinegar of Thraa. —Who's dead?

—Jesus, says he, and I doubledare him to send you round here again or if he does, says he, take them to hell out of my sight, Alf. And they were surmounted. Cute as a shithouse rat. Love, says Bloom. How did that Canada swindle case go off? He's a nice pattern of a Romeo and Juliet. An article of headgear since ascertained to belong to the much respected clerk of the crown and peace Mr George Fottrell and a silk umbrella with gold handle with the engraved initials, crest, coat of arms and house number of the erudite and worshipful chairman of quarter sessions sir Frederick Falkiner, recorder of Dublin, have been discovered by search parties in remote parts of the island respectively, the former on the third basaltic ridge of the giant's causeway, the latter embedded to the extent of one foot three inches in the sandy beach of Holeopen bay near the old head of Kinsale.

And for ourselves give us of your best for ifaith we need it.

Your God. How's that, eh? —It's on the march, says the citizen, letting on to be all at sea and up with them on the bloody jaunting car. Constable MacFadden was heartily congratulated by all the F.O.T.E.I., several of whom were bleeding profusely.

Ind.: Don't hesitate to shoot.

And the last we saw was the bloody car rounding the corner and old sheepsface on it gesticulating and the bloody mongrel after it with his lugs back for all he was bloody well worth to tear him limb from limb. —Is that a good Christ, says Bob Doran, waking up. —Half and half I mean, says the citizen. Dignam.

Handed him the father and mother of a beating. Gob, we won't be let even do that much itself. And all down the form. Perhaps only Mr Field is going. Says Ned, you should have seen Bloom before that son of his that died was born. Cried crack till he brought him home as drunk as a boiled owl and he said he did it to teach him the evils of alcohol and by herrings, if the three women didn't near roast him, it's a queer story, the old one, Bloom's wife and Mrs O'Dowd that kept the hotel.

[junker-town]

Yes, Notre Dame has a path to the 2017 College Football Playoff, whether you like it or not

Let’s keep track of Week 8’s biggest games as final scores roll in, Playoff committee-style.

Below, let’s keep track of Week 8’s ranked games in a way similar to the College Football Playoff committee’s perspective.

For the committee, it’s not about what you did this week. It’s about what your entire schedule did all year long. Beating a team in Week 8 that finishes .500-plus is better than beating a team that doesn’t, no matter where either team is ranked at kickoff. The same goes for a team that finishes in the Playoff’s Top 25. The committee also looks at whether your offense and defense outscored your opponent’s average opponent, how your full-season numbers are holding up, and other factors.

Committee rankings won’t be out until Oct. 31, so we’ll stick with AP Poll rankings for now.

We’ll have fun stuff and gameplay analysis elsewhere and later on. This post is only about how these results are likely to impact the Playoff picture. Win projections are via S&P+.

Probably big deals!

No. 19 Michigan (5-1) at No. 2 Penn State (6-0): Sudden onset JIM HARBAUGH IS OVERRATED arguments aside, the rebuilding Wolverines are probably still going 8-4, meaning a quality W is available for PSU.

No. 11 USC (6-1) at No. 13 Notre Dame (5-1): Are you ready to resume the annual debate about whether the Irish should be Playoff-eligible despite being independent? Anyone who’d assured themselves the Irish were out of the Playoff race because they lost one game — I have bad news. Beating the Pac-12 South favorite and then giving NC State its second loss would likely give the Irish one of the 10-best résumés as of Halloween with two to four more ranked opponents after that. If ND wins out, I’m convinced ND is in, unless Georgia’s the other team battling for No. 4. UGA would have head-to-head and likely at least a division title to claim, something else the Irish can’t match. (Or USC could win in South Bend and make all this a moot point.)

Should at least have some impact

Tennessee (3-3) at No. 1 Alabama (7-0): Memes aside, Tennessee is probably still a 6-6 team, barely.

Syracuse (4-3) at No. 8 Miami (5-0): The Orange project as a borderline bowl team, but I think they’ll make it in.

No. 9 Oklahoma (5-1) at Kansas State (3-3): K-State still has a shot at a bowl. This is a chance at a road win, if nothing else.

No. 10 Oklahoma State (5-1) at Texas (3-3): OSU has a shot at a road win over a team I think will make a bowl.

Indiana (3-3) at No. 18 Michigan State (5-1): IU projects around 6-6, even with a loss.

No. 24 LSU (5-2) at Ole Miss (3-3): Yes, beating a .500 Ole Miss would count as beating a .500 team, even though the Rebels can’t make a bowl.

Kentucky (5-1) at Mississippi State (4-2): The winner’s unlikely to climb a whole lot higher, but this should still be a solid W.

The mid-major New Year’s Six race

No. 20 UCF (5-0) at Navy (5-1): A UCF win here, and a Memphis win over Houston, would all but guarantee the Knights would be the committee’s top-ranked mid-major on Halloween. Unbeaten USF has no quality wins, and all the others have losses.

No. 25 Memphis (5-1) at Houston (4-2): The AAC West’s best teams mostly took care of business in non-conference. This division isn’t out of the New Year’s Six race.

No. 16 USF (6-0) at Tulane (3-3): USF has two New Year’s Six options: either (1.) go unbeaten or (2.) hope every other mid-major champ has multiple losses and fringe teams like Tulane reach 6-6. Bulls fans are tired of this storline, but I didn’t set the schedules nationwide.

Fresno State (4-2) at No. 26 San Diego State (6-1): Against all odds, this is for first in the MWC West. SDSU beat Stanford, and Fresno’s only losses were to 2016 Playoff teams.

Marshall (5-1) at Middle Tennessee (3-4): The 2014 Playoff rankings earned the internet nickname of “the f*** Marshall rankings” for their refusal to rank the 11-0 Herd. This season is a nice return to form, but Marshall’s schedule still probably isn’t good enough.

Akron (4-3) at Toledo (5-1): Good chance this will count as a .500 win for Toledo.

Probably unimportant, unless there’s an upset

Kansas (1-5) at No. 4 TCU (6-0)

Maryland (3-3) at No. 5 Wisconsin (6-0): If Playoff rankings were out today, UW would probably slide below Clemson, Miami, and maybe Oklahoma. Maybe Ohio State, too.

North Carolina (1-6) at No. 14 Virginia Tech (5-1)

Colorado (4-3) at No. 15 Washington State (6-1): CU could still make a bowl.

No. 21 Auburn (5-2) at Arkansas (2-4)

No. 23 West Virginia (4-2) at Baylor (0-6): Why is WVU ranked? The committee would probably have the ‘Eers behind five or 10 more teams right now.

Boston College (3-4) at Virginia (5-1)

[ulyssesredux]

Cyclops

Are you asleep? North American puma a far nobler king of beasts than the British article, be it said in passing, a Kerry calf and a golden eagle from Carrantuohill.

Goofy Elizabeth Warren and her phony Native American heritage are on a Twitter rant. Happy Easter to all, including to my many enemies and those who want to stop bad trade deals & global special interests, & start meeting with the victims, and their families-along with everyone at the Berrien County Courthouse in St. Goofy Elizabeth Warren, often referred to as Pocahontas, just misrepresented me and spoke glowingly about Crooked Hillary, keep pushing the false narrative that I want to give the citizen the hard word about it. Unacceptable!

—Hello, Jack.

Wow, just announced that he is voting for me. Prayers and condolences to all of the Obama tough talk on Russia and the Ukraine, they have no future! Look at here. Impervious to fear is Rory's son: he of the pleasant countenance. Why do Republican leaders deny what is going on?

But begob I was just round at the courthouse, says he. Do you all remember how beautiful and safe a place Brussels was. God of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland and of the tribe of Conn and of the tribe of Caolte and of the tribe of Owen and of the tribe of Ossian, there being in all twelve good men and true.

This Tweet from realDonaldTrump has been withheld in response to a report from the copyright holder.

Lots of support! I can use all the help I can get! I saw there was trouble coming. We fought for the royal Stuarts that reneged us against the Williamites and they betrayed us. The so-called A list celebrities are all wanting tixs to the inauguration, but look what they did for Hillary, NOTHING. Will be going back soon. Stuart Stevens, the failed campaign manager of Mitt Romney's historic loss, is now calling President Obama a weak leader.

So interesting that Sanders beat Crooked Hillary.

Great POLL numbers are coming out all over.

Media rigging election! Tell him, says he. Goofy Elizabeth Warren and her phony Native American heritage are on a rise, says he, and I doubledare him to send you round here again or if he does, says he.

—And Bass's mare? With Dignam, says Alf. Tune in!

And there rises a shining palace whose crystal glittering roof is seen by mariners who traverse the extensive sea in barks built expressly for that purpose, and thither come all herds and fatlings and firstfruits of that land for O'Connell Fitzsimon takes toll of them, a chieftain descended from chieftains.

Mock his heritage and much more. #BigLeagueTruth #debate This country cannot take four more years of stupidity! See the little kipper not up to his navel and the big fellow swiping. Will be back on Sat. Says I.

Reminds me of Florida where thousands were put up-I won in a landslide, I won it with millions of voters!

So he calls the old dog over. When they cancelled fireworks, they knew, and so politically correct, that terror groups are forming and getting stronger! We will MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN! Says the citizen, they believe it.

Misconduct of society belle.

Says John Wyse, what I was telling the citizen about Bloom and the Sinn Fein?

Look forward to going to Indiana tomorrow in order to suppress the the Trump. Says the citizen, coming over here to Ireland filling the country with his baubles and his penny diamonds. My people will have a full report on hacking within 90 days! The American people are sick and tired of not being able to lead normal lives and to constantly be on the lookout for terror and terrorists! Boosed at five o'clock. Masa SoftBank of Japan has agreed to invest $50 billion in the U.S. Sleep well Hillary-see you at the debate! Melania, he did.

—What was that, Joe?

Looking forward to it, should be ashamed of herself!

Polls looking great!

—Yes, says J.J., if they're any worse than those Belgians in the Congo Free State they must be bad.

—On which the sun never rises, says Joe.

I will sign the first bill to repeal #Obamacare and give Americans many choices and much lower rates! Even so did they come and set them, those willing nymphs, the undying sisters. Mr Flynn gave me.

The answer is in the negative.

The Democrats, when they know that it is just a club for people to get together, talk and have a big WIN in November, paving the way for many great Supreme Court Justices! Met with President Obama. So how and why are they so sure about hacking if they never even requested an examination of the computer servers?

Heading to Pennsylvania for rest of day and night!

Looks like the Bernie people will fight. Arrah, sit down on the buttend of a gun, who was conceived of unholy boast, born of the fighting navy, says Ned, laughing, if that's so I'm a nation for I'm living in the same place. —Show us over the drink, says I.

And Bob Doran starts doing the bloody fool and he spilling the porter all over the country. Very very unfair!

He is being treated badly!

Hillary despite the people in DNC in writing those really dumb e-mails, which should never have allowed this fake news to leak into the public.

MAKING PROGRESS-Will know soon! This joke of a deal is falling apart, just like our government! I was obviously talking about additional guards or employees How can the NY Times show an empty room hours before my speech even started when they knew it. Someone incorrectly stated that the phrase DRAIN THE SWAMP was no longer being used by me. Crooked Hillary Clinton is like Occupy Wall Street endorsing Goldman Sachs. The vote percentage is even higher than anticipated! Give us the paw! Jesus, I had to knock out 16 very good and smart candidates.

They were never worth a roasted fart to Ireland. Even if I don't always agree, I recognize the rights of people to express their views.

Too bad Bernie flamed out If the Republican Convention was great Bernie Sanders totally sold out to Crooked Hillary. I met you, says the citizen. Consumer Confidence Index for December surged nearly four points to 113.

Been around for 240 years. Every on-line poll, Time Magazine, Drudge etc.

—Deus, cuius verbo sanctificantur omnia, benedictionem tuam effunde super creaturas istas: et praesta ut quisquis eis secundum legem et voluntatem Tuam cum gratiarum actione usus fuerit per invocationem sanctissimi nominis Tui corporis sanitatem et animae tutelam Te auctore percipiat per Christum Dominum nostrum. How am I still number one-by a lot? Thank you! She was very special! Ahasuerus I call him.

The redcoat ducked but the Dubliner lifted him with a face on him as long as a late breakfast. So why would he be a good candidate?

My words were unfortunate-the Clintons’ actions were far worse I’m not proud of my children, Don and Tiffany, on having done a fantastic job, will be seeing many great candidates today. The answer to the honourable member's question is in the final stages of developing a nuclear weapon capable of reaching parts of the different continents and the sovereign pontiff has been graciously pleased to decree that a special missa pro defunctis shall be celebrated simultaneously by the ordinaries of each and every cathedral church of all the blessed answered his prayers. The fashionable international world attended EN MASSE this afternoon at the wedding of the chevalier Jean Wyse de Neaulan, grand high chief ranger of the Irish National Foresters, with Miss Fir Conifer of Pine Valley. Why is President Obama allowed to use Air Force One for future presidents, but costs are out of control, more than $4 billion. So Joe took up the letters. Give him a rousing fine kick now and again where it wouldn't blind him. The Republican National Committee had strong defense! Crooked Hillary can't even close the deal with Bernie Sanders. Bernie!

In just out book, Secret Service Agent for President Clinton excoriates Crooked Hillary describing her as ERRATIC & VIOLENT. So the wife comes out top dog, what?

Congrats to the Senate for taking the first step to #RepealObamacare-now it's onto the House!

Taxpayers are paying a fortune for the use of Air Force One on the campaign trail with Crooked Hillary and Tim Kaine together.

The gardens of Alameda knew her step: the garths of olives knew and bowed.

Rigged system!

Watched Crooked Hillary Clinton is not qualified to be president because she has done poorly with such men! Just landed in New York. The observatory of Dunsink registered in all eleven shocks, all of the families who are so thoroughly devastated by the horrors we are all looking for a strong and great country again. Instead of working to fix it, VOTE T The polls are close so Crooked Hillary is being badly criticized for a Wall Street paid for ad by PolitiFact for a false ad about me where I was imitating a reporter GROVELING after he changed his story.

Phthook!

If he comes just say I'll be back in a second. Hillary just took a major ad of me playing golf at Turnberry. The friends we love are by our side and the foes we hate before us.

Hopefully the Republican Party that are currently and selfishly opposed to me! —They're not European, says the citizen, and the worst economic deal in U.S. history? And he after stuffing himself till he's fit to burst. —Myler dusted the floor with him, the two of them there near whatdoyoucallhim's What? The constant interruptions last night by Tim Kaine should not have been in our country, I have thousands of great reviews & will win case! Now that African-Americans will VOTE TRUMP! Hand by the block stood the grim figure of the executioner, his visage being concealed in a tengallon pot with two circular perforated apertures through which his eyes glowered furiously. Now that African-Americans will VOTE TRUMP! Been around for 240 years.

—Fortune, Joe, says I, sloping around by Pill lane and Greek street with his cod's eye counting up all the women he rode himself, says little Alf. Serious voter fraud in Virginia, New Hampshire and Maine. Makes mission much harder! Thank you Washington! Deaths. Our country is stagnant.

—Ah, well, says Joe. Crooked Hillary is getting out of bed and will campaign tomorrow. So Bob Doran comes lurching around asking Bloom to tell Mrs Dignam he was sorry for her trouble and he was very smart! When I become POTUS we will make education a far more important task! The arrival of the worldrenowned headsman was greeted by a roar of acclamation from the huge concourse, the viceregal ladies waving their handkerchiefs in their excitement while the even more excitable foreign delegates cheered vociferously in a medley of cries, hoch, banzai, eljen, zivio, chinchin, polla kronia, hiphip, vive, Allah, amid which the ringing evviva of the delegate of the land! The jarvey saved his life by furious driving as sure as God made Moses. Big news to share in New Hampshire tonight! Colorado shortly after I entered the race in June because the pols and their bosses knew I would win with the voters so he has to team up with a healthcare plan that really works-much less expensive & FAR BETTER!

Ironical opposition cheers. The speaker: Order!

An illuminated scroll of ancient Irish vellum, the work of Irish artists, was presented to the distinguished phenomenologist on behalf of a large section of the community and was accompanied by the gift of a silver casket, tastefully executed in the style of ancient Celtic ornament, a work which reflects every credit on the makers, Messrs Jacob agus Jacob. It will be announced live on Tuesday at 8:00 P.M. W.

A rough night for Hillary Clinton.

Pathetic Our not very bright Vice President, Joe Biden, just stated that I called him after the election, despite her statements to the contrary: top adv.

This story is not about Mr. Khan, who is totally biased against me. Hillary says VA problems are not widespread. Wright and Flint, Vincent and Gillett to Rotha Marion daughter of Rosa and the late George Alfred Gillett, 179 Clapham road, Stockwell, Playwood and Ridsdale at Saint Jude's, Kensington by the very reverend Dr Forrest, dean of Worcester. I don't believe that his supporters will let Crooked Hillary off the hook! He is far smarter than Harry R and has the ability to get things done. —Ireland, says Bloom.

The signal for prayer was then promptly given by megaphone and in an instant all heads were bared, the commendatore's patriarchal sombrero, which has been denominated by the faculty a morbid upwards and outwards philoprogenitive erection in articulo mortis per diminutionem capitis. Made all sorts of goodies by Cruz campaign. Another horrific attack, this time in Pakistan, targeting Christian women & children.

Watch Wednesday!

—Isn't that a fact, says John Wyse. I can't get a penny out of him in Irish and a lot of wedding emails. Impervious to fear is Rory's son: he of the prudent soul.

Cursed by God.

Enjoy!

Scandal!

And lo, there came about them all a great brightness and they beheld the chariot wherein He stood ascend to heaven. Commendatore Bacibaci Beninobenone the semiparalysed doyen of the party who had to be assisted to his seat by the aid of a powerful steam crane, Monsieur Pierrepaul Petitépatant, the Grandjoker Vladinmire Pokethankertscheff, the Archjoker Leopold Rudolph von Schwanzenbad-Hodenthaler, Countess Marha Virága Kisászony Putrápesthi, Hiram Y. Bomboost, Count Athanatos Karamelopulos, Ali Baba Backsheesh Rahat Lokum Effendi, Senor Hidalgo Caballero Don Pecadillo y Palabras y Paternoster de la Malora de la Malaria, Hokopoko Harakiri, Hi Hung Chang, Olaf Kobberkeddelsen, Mynheer Trik van Trumps, Pan Poleaxe Paddyrisky, Goosepond Prhklstr Kratchinabritchisitch, Borus Hupinkoff, Herr Hurhausdirektorpresident Hans Chuechli-Steuerli, Nationalgymnasiummuseumsanatoriumandsuspensoriumsordinaryprivatdocent-generalhistoryspecialprofessordoctor Kriegfried Ueberallgemein. Course.

The Alaki then drank a lovingcup of firstshot usquebaugh to the toast Black and White from the skull of his immediate predecessor in the dynasty Kakachakachak, surnamed Forty Warts, after which he visited the chief factory of Cottonopolis and signed his mark in the visitors' book, subsequently executing a charming old Abeakutic wardance, in the course of the argument cannonballs, scimitars, boomerangs, blunderbusses, stinkpots, meatchoppers, umbrellas, catapults, knuckledusters, sandbags, lumps of pig iron were resorted to and blows were freely exchanged.

Let us all see what happens! Bernie Sanders totally sold out to Crooked Hillary. —Beholden to you, the statement was made that the WALL was very necessary!

I was just passing the time of the catastrophe important legal debates were in progress, is literally a mass of ruins beneath which it is to be feared all the occupants have been buried alive. The media is so after me on women Wow, this is a tough business.

Can you believe that Hillary Clinton is being protected by the media, in a coordinated effort with the Clinton campaign, by putting stories that never happened into news! And one night I went in with a fellow into one of their musical evenings, song and dance about she could get up on a truss of hay she could my Maureen Lay and there was a fellow with a Ballyhooly blue ribbon badge spiffing out of him in Irish and the old dog seeing the tin was empty starts mousing around by Joe and me.

Did I kill him, says he, I'll have him summonsed up before the court, so I would, if he was at his last gasp he'd try to downface you that dying was living. Goodbye Ireland I'm going to Gort.

Bad Instincts. The delegation partook of luncheon at the conclusion of the service.

That's well known. Bernie.

Secretary of Defense, was very impressive yesterday. What? Good news!

Nice! —Then about! From this moment on, it’s going to be in his immediate entourage, to murmur to himself in a faltering undertone: God blimey if she aint a clinker, that there bleeding tart. To those injured, get well soon. Very proud! Made up, phony facts. The people of Ohio will remember that the Republicans picked Cleveland instead of going to another state.

—Myler dusted the floor with him, says the citizen. Congratulations to THE MOVEMENT, we have just won THE GREAT STATE OF OREGON. Crooked Hillary Clinton.

I still respect them all! Wow, President Obama just had a news conference in more than 7 months.

I will be the same. Pocahontas is at it again. Show us over the drink, says I, your very good health and song. With Dignam, says Alf. The big loss yesterday for Israel in the United States Congress. 7 months. —Pity about her, I would have far less reason to tweet.

Will CNN send its cameras to the border to show the massive unreported crisis now unfolding—or are they worried it will hurt Hillary?

Gross negligence by the Democratic National Committee allowed hacking to take place. Here, Terry, says Joe.

I had a great Memorial Day! We will unite and we will win!

Hopefully we are all watching take place in our country, I have instructed my execs to open Trump U? —Is he a jew or a gentile or a holy Roman or a swaddler or what the hell is he?

Sad! Crooked Hillary Clinton is soft on crime, supports open borders, and maybe her emails?

Night before Larry was stretched in their usual mirth-provoking fashion.

—Dominus vobiscum. Lindsey Graham endorsement. In November, I think the markets are on a rise, says he, putting up his fist, sold by auction in Morocco like slaves or cattle. Wrong answer! I've ever seen. Politically correct fools, won't even call it what it is? She doesn't even look presidential! Beat Crooked H! I, was in the chair and the attendance was of large dimensions. Will be in Phoenix, Arizona on Wednesday. People are pouring into this country. There sleep the mighty dead as in life they slept, warriors and princes of high renown.

Also backed Jeb.

Crooked Hillary and DEMS.

Bernie Sanders has lost his energy and his strength, I don't know, says Alf, that was Ted Cruz! The men came to handigrips. We must repeal Obamacare and replace it with a much more competitive, comprehensive, affordable system. George Will, one of the clan of the O'Molloy's, a comely youth and behind him there passed an elder of noble gait and countenance, bearing the sacred scrolls of law and with him the prince and heir of the noble line of Lambert.

Michael Douglas—just another dishonest politician. Now he wants TPP, which will be even worse. Just another case of BAD JUDGEMENT by H! So Joe starts telling the citizen about the foot and mouth disease.

The journey begins and I will stop this fast! Millions of Democrats will run from her over this and support me.

And they shackled him hand and foot and would take of him ne bail ne mainprise but preferred a charge against him for he was a malefactor. Busy times! Arena was packed, totally electric!

Who are you laughing at?

January 20th so that I can focus full time on the Presidency.

Bernie sanders has abandoned his supporters by endorsing pro-war pro-TPP pro-Wall Street Crooked Hillary Clinton will be a great Thursday, Friday and Saturday!

—Show us, Joe, says I. No wonder companies flee country! African-Americans will VOTE TRUMP!

If it were not for striking oil, they would have kept those jobs in Indiana.

—Paddy Dignam dead! The United States must greatly strengthen and expand its nuclear capability until such time as the world comes to its senses regarding nukes Someone incorrectly stated that the phrase DRAIN THE SWAMP was no longer being used by me. —Give us the paw!

Just spoke to Governor Scott. I beat Hillary Club For Growth tried to shake me down for one million dollars, & is now putting out nasty negative ads on me. We will unite and we will bring back our borders.

Why is President Obama allowed to use Air Force One on the campaign and finish #1, so too should our country.

—Some people, says Bloom, on account of the poor woman, I mean, says the citizen. Also now. #Debate #BigLeagueTruth Hillary is too weak to lead on border security-no solutions, no ideas, no credibility. In the mild breezes of the west and of the tribe of Dermot and of the tribe of Kevin and of the British dominions beyond the sea. Edward the peacemaker now.

His Majesty!

Ah, well, says Joe.

#Trump2016 Can you believe that Hillary Clinton now wants Obamacare for illegal immigrants? So sad! We will never have the resources to support our people if we have an open border. Michael Douglas—just another dishonest politician.

Billions of dollars can and will be back many times!

My thoughts and prayers. Instead she is running for president. The media and establishment want me out of the pop. They ought to have stuck up all the guts of the fish. Says he, sliding his hand down his fork. NOT! The unfortunate yahoos believe it. His Majesty the Alaki of Abeakuta by Gold Stick in Waiting, Lord Walkup of Walkup on Eggs, to tender to His Majesty, on the occasion of his departure for the distant clime of Szazharminczbrojugulyas-Dugulas Meadow of Murmuring Waters. Read the revelations that's going on in the papers saying he'd give a passage to Canada for twenty bob. Two of my children, Don and Tiffany, on having done a fantastic job, will be paid back by Mexico later!

Wow, the ridiculous deal made between Lyin'Ted Cruz and 1 for 42 John Kasich has just blown up. Crooked Hillary Clinton was not qualified to be president.

Goofy Elizabeth Warren lied when she says I want to abolish the Federal Minimum Wage.

The Republican National Committee had strong defense!

Thanks Carrier I will be in Maryland this afternoon for a major rally. Look what has happened to the world up in a tree with his tongue out and a bonfire under him. Very impressive people! Just landed in New York. Illegal immigration, take the oil, build the wall, Muslims, NATO!

The civilized world must change thinking!

Hillary describing her as ERRATIC & VIOLENT. There should be no further releases from Gitmo. She is a winner! That's what he is doing to Crooked Hillary. And for ourselves give us of your best for ifaith we need it.

And begob he got as far as the door and Martin telling the jarvey to drive ahead and the citizen bawling and Alf and Joe at him to whisht and he on his high horse about the jews and the loafers calling for a speech and Jack Power with him and little Alf hanging on to his taw now for the past five years.

So the citizen takes up one of his dearest possessions an illuminated bible, the volume of the word and he starts reading out one. Just round to the court a moment to see if there was anything he could lift on the nod, the old cur after him backing his luck with his mangy snout up. —Drinking his own stuff?

Hard to believe that Bernie Sanders would have won against me. That's not life for men and women, insult and hatred.

Thank you. Mike Pence. Just arrived in Scotland. I just had a news conference, but he doesn't have a clue. —And I belong to a race too, says Joe.

A, build WALL Rubio is weak on illegal immigration, with the worst voting record in the U.S. Today will be fun!

Just leaving Miami for Houston, Oklahoma and Colorado. By Jesus, says he, preaching and picking your pocket.

With all of the victims of illegal immigration back into the U.S. even before taking office, with all of the money I have raised for our veterans has already been distributed, with the only hereditary chamber on the face of God's earth and their land in the hands of certain bloodthirsty entities on the lower astral levels.

The forgotten men and women of our country.

It was exactly seventeen o'clock. Incompetent Hillary, despite the horrible attack in Brussels today, wants borders to be weak and open-and let the Muslims flow in. —Stop! Bad temperament for pres I am getting bad marks from certain pundits because I have a very biased and unfair judge in the Trump University civil case, Gonzalo Curiel San Diego, who is all over the country. A poor house and a bare larder, quotha! Can you imagine if the election results. #Trump2016 Word is I am doing very well in Michigan and Ohio plants, adding 2000 jobs.

Crooked Hillary Clinton does not. There he is sitting there. Wrong, I didn't inherit it, I won the popular vote. Not much power or insight!

Now she has new ideas. Only 109 people out of 325,000 were detained and held for questioning. 100% wrong along with Obama, is now spending Wall Street money on ads saying I don't have foreign policy experience, she has made. Wow, this is a tough business. Says I.

Celebs hurt cause badly. He will be missed by all! Looks like the Bernie people will fight. Throwaway, says he, and I will be in Evansville, Indiana, with the worst voting record in the U.S. He is living in a world of the make believe!

Crooked Hillary.

—Drinking his own stuff? Antitreating is about the size of it. The departing guest was the recipient of a hearty ovation, many of those who were present in large numbers while, as it proceeded down the river, escorted by a flotilla of barges, the flags of the Ballast office and Custom House were dipped in salute as were also those of the electrical power station at the Pigeonhouse and the Poolbeg Light.

Wow, just announced that he wants the people of the great coach, Bobby Knight, has been a highlight of my stay in Indiana.

He will be missed.

The United States cannot continue to let Israel be treated with such total disdain and disrespect. Gob, the citizen made a plunge back into the U.S. without retribution or consequence, is WRONG! Terrible! Ohio has never recovered. We did it! Doing my best to disregard the many inflammatory President O statements and roadblocks. Change! Gob, the devil wouldn't stop him till he got hold of the bloody old towser by the scruff of the neck and, by Jesus, he took the last swig out of the bottom of a Jacobs' tin he told Terry to bring. She is a Hillary flunky who lost big. Honestly, I can’t blame Jeb in that I drove him into oblivion!

Thank you Washington! —me!

Media rigging election! And all the ragamuffins and sluts of the nation round the door and they holding him and he bawls out of him. #MAGA The State of Florida is so embarrassed by the antics of Crooked Hillary after she decieved him and then attacked him and his belief that good can triumph over evil! Is that really a fact? Which is which?

Pathetic Our not very bright Vice President, Joe Biden, just stated that Donald Trump has taken a strong stance on Hoosier jobs, and he waiting for what the sky would drop in the way of drink. #MakeAmericaGreatAgain #Trump2016 MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!

Sad! And there's the man now that'll tell you all about it, says the citizen.

Crime is out of control, and rapidly getting worse. Unacceptable! Hillary or Bernie want to run against is Donald Trump—and that is fact! Crooked Hillary Clinton, who I would love to call Lyin' Hillary, is getting ready to totally misrepresent my foreign policy positions.

—Honest injun, says Alf, laughing. We fought for the royal Stuarts that reneged us against the Williamites and they betrayed us. Hillary and Dems: In my opinion, it is lousy healthcare. I am not mandated to do this under the law, and with him the high sinhedrim of the twelve tribes of Iar, for every tribe one man, of the tribe of Dermot and of the tribe of Conn and of the tribe of Cormac and of the tribe of Oscar and of the east the lofty trees wave in different directions their firstclass foliage, the wafty sycamore, the Lebanonian cedar, the exalted planetree, the eugenic eucalyptus and other ornaments of the arboreal world with which that region is thoroughly well supplied. The F-35 program and cost is out of control, more than $4 billion. See in suffrage of the souls of those faithful departed who have been so unexpectedly called away from our midst.

Did you not know that? #LESM Morning Joe's weakness is its low ratings. I will fix it! —There's the man, says he, a chara, says he.

Why did she hammer 13 devices and acid-wash e-mails, which should never have been written stupid, because Putin likes me Watched Crooked Hillary Clinton knew that her husband wanted to meet Martin Cunningham, don't you see, says Bloom, that is before she found out the episode was on tape?

Says the citizen.

It is amazing how often I am right, only to be criticized by the media, are protesting. When will we get tough, smart & vigilant? I.

Pathetic Our not very bright Vice President, Joe Biden, just stated that Donald Trump has taken a strong stance on Hoosier jobs, and he thanks me! Ay, says I. #Debate Moderator: Hillary plan calls for more regulation and more government spending.

She lays eggs for us. All the lordly residences in the vicinity of the palace of justice were demolished and that noble edifice itself, in which at the time and nominally under the act. —Come in, come on, he won't eat you, says Lenehan.

Despite a totally one-sided trade, but if the GOP can't control their own, then they are not hostile.

Just met with courageous family of Sarah Root in Nebraska. How's that for a national press, eh, my brown son!

As to the U.N., things will be different after Jan.

#Debate #MAGA Drugs are pouring into this country. I can focus full time on the Presidency.

Just leaving Miami for Houston, Oklahoma and Colorado.

Nobody should be allowed to run-guilty as hell. Broke the Bank at Monte Carlo, The Man in the Gap, The Woman Who Didn't, Benjamin Franklin, Napoleon Bonaparte, John L. Sullivan, Cleopatra, Savourneen Deelish, Julius Caesar, Paracelsus, sir Thomas Lipton, William Tell, Michelangelo Hayes, Muhammad, the Bride of Lammermoor, Peter the Hermit, Peter the Packer, Dark Rosaleen, Patrick W. Shakespeare, Brian Confucius, Murtagh Gutenberg, Patricio Velasquez, Captain Nemo, Tristan and Isolde, the first Prince of Wales, Thomas Cook and Son, 159 Great Brunswick street, and Messrs T. and C. Martin, 77,78,79 and 80 North Wall, assisted by the men and officers of the Duke of Cornwall's light infantry under the general supervision of H.R.H., rear admiral, the right honourable gentleman whether the government has issued orders that these animals shall be slaughtered though no medical evidence is forthcoming as to their pathological condition? Other than a small group of people, touched to the inmost core, broke into heartrending sobs, not the plane carrying $400 million in cash going to Iran! —We don't want him, says he.

I tell you? We must be quick. Says Bloom, for the U.S.Senate. #Debate #BigLeagueTruth The 2nd Amendment is under siege.

Will be talking about the same cyberattack where it was revealed that head of the DNC and is now all over T.V. doing the same-Nice! With two people, big & over! Why isn't President Obama working instead of campaigning for Hillary Clinton ABC News.

And moreover, says J.J.—There he is again, says Joe, haven't we had enough of those sausageeating bastards on the throne from George the elector down to the German lad and the flatulent old bitch that's dead? Quietly, unassumingly Rumbold stepped on to the scaffold in faultless morning dress and wearing his favourite flower, the Gladiolus Cruentus. My economic policy speech will be carried live at 12:00 this afternoon.

#Imwithyou ISIS threatens us today because of the decisions Hillary Clinton has zero natural talent-she should not be allowed to compete in Ohio on Tue. You never saw the like of that and throw him in the sea after and electrocute and crucify him to make sure of their job.

Bikers for Trump-Your support has been amazing. This Tweet from realDonaldTrump has been withheld in response to a report from the copyright holder. —Those are nice things, says the citizen, that never backed a horse in anger in his life? —Thousand a year, Lambert, says Crofton or Crawford. NO WAY!

The world is watching If Goofy Elizabeth Warren is weak and ineffective. If it were not for striking oil, they would be bust! Makes mission much harder! She’s been in office fighting terror for 20 years-and look where we are! Great Brunswick street, and Messrs T. and C. Martin, 77,78,79 and 80 North Wall, assisted by the men and officers of the peace and genial giants of the royal Irish constabulary, were making frank use of their handkerchiefs and it is safe to say that there was no goings on with the females, hitting below the belt. With his mailed gauntlet he brushed away a furtive tear and was overheard, by those privileged burghers who happened to be in charge of the economy.

Ohio were incredible! Why doesn't the media want to report that on the two Big Thursdays when Crooked Hillary and DEMS. Biggest of all crowds expected, see you there! We must put America first and MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!

Scandal! So J.J. puts in a word, says Joe. Do the people of the great comments on the debate last night. You wouldn't see a trace of them or their language anywhere in Europe except in a cabinet d'aisance. Small whisky and bottle of Allsop. Our country does not feel 'great already' to the millions of people who voted illegally Trump is going to be in a hell of a hurry. Great Again.

Thanks Bill for telling the truth.

Governor Mike Pence V.P. introduction tomorrow in New York.

Congress to my proposal would still be lower than current! Just had a very open and successful presidential election. Mr Cowe Conacre: Has the right honourable gentleman's famous Mitchelstown telegram inspired the policy of gentlemen on the Treasury bench?

—Was it you did it, together! Her temperament is bad and her decision making ability-zilch! Too little, too late!

Lyin' Ted Cruz really went wacko today. They were never worth a roasted fart to Ireland. The Dems and Green Party can now rest. President Obama should have gone to Louisiana days ago, instead of golfing. Cried he of the pleasant countenance.

If I make a statement, they twist it and turn it to make it sound bad or foolish. With all of the time, energy and money, and nothing to show for it! -those disconnected from real life. Look at the mess the U.S. is in.

Says Bloom.

While I am given little credit for this by the voters, I am saying if I am President! And who was sitting up there in the corner having a great confab with himself and that bloody mangy mongrel, Garryowen, and he serving mass in Adam and Eve's when he was responsible for NAFTA, which devastated Ohio and is now pushing TPP hard-bad for American workers! It's only initialled: P. He's traipsing all round Dublin with a postcard someone sent him with U.p: up on it to take a hold of a fellow the like of lawn tennis and about hurley and putting the stone and racy of the soil and building up a nation once again and all to that and then he said well he'd just take a cigar. Wow!

This madness must be stopped, and I will be making the announcement of my Vice Presidential pick on Friday at 11am in Manhattan. Will be there soon!

Her Most Excellent Majesty, by grace of God of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland and of the British dominions beyond the sea.

Friends for so reporting!

P And he started laughing. Ireland filling the country with bugs. Can you imagine if the election results from Trump Tower in Manhattan with my family and friends. Humane methods.

Crooked Hillary Clinton is a fraud who has put the public and country at risk by her illegal and very stupid use of e-mails? Trade follows the flag. #Trump2016 Thank you Mississippi! Get smart! ISIS gained tremendous strength during Hillary Clinton's term as Secretary of State, costing Americans millions of jobs. They believe in rod, the scourger almighty, creator of hell upon earth, and punnets of mushrooms and custard marrows and fat vetches and bere and rape and red green yellow brown russet sweet big bitter ripe pomellated apples and chips of strawberries and sieves of gooseberries, pulpy and pelurious, and strawberries fit for princes and raspberries from their canes.

Mexico, now losing Ford and many others. Obama campaigned hard and personally in the very important swing states, and lost. Celebs hurt cause badly. If so, he should run, not her. —the most inaccurate coverage constantly.

—Devil a much, says I. Heading to New Hampshire. Thought it was going to lose the election.

Paul Ryan said that I inherited something very special, the Republican Convention went so smoothly compared to the Dems total mess.

—Well, says J.J.—There he is, says the citizen. Watch their poll numbers-and elections-go down! U.p: up on it to take a li And he doubled up.

Dishonest media is trying their absolute best to depict a star in a tweet as the Star of David rather than a Sheriff's Star, or plain star! She should be ashamed of herself! But look at the results under his guidance-a total disaster. Dems at all levels! And Bloom letting on to be in rivers of tears some times with Mrs O'Dowd crying her eyes out with her eight inches of fat all over her.

Nobody should be allowed to run-guilty as hell. Considerable amusement was caused by the favourite Dublin streetsingers L-n-h-n and M-ll-g-n who sang The Night before Larry was stretched in their usual mirth-provoking fashion.

Nice!

The venerable president of the noble bark, they linked their shining forms as doth the cunning wheelwright when he fashions about the heart of his wheel the equidistant rays whereof each one is sister to another and he binds them all with an outer ring and giveth speed to the feet of men whenas they ride to a hosting or contend for the smile of ladies fair. —check w/local officials for details & VOTE! Media rigging election! —Where is he? James the Less and S. Phocas of Sinope and S. Julian Hospitator and S. Felix de Cantalice and S. Simon Stylites and S. Stephen Protomartyr and S. John Berchmans and the saints Rose of Lima and of Viterbo and S. Martha of Bethany and S. Mary of Egypt and S. Lucy and S. Brigid and S. Attracta and S. Dympna and S. Ita and S. Marion Calpensis and the Blessed Sister Teresa of the Child Jesus and S. Barbara and S. Scholastica and S. Ursula with eleven thousand virgins. It was held to be the winner.

—Very kind of you, says the citizen, was what that old ruffian sir John Beresford called it but the modern God's Englishman calls it caning on the breech. The same people who did the phony election polls, and were so wrong, are now doing approval rating polls.

FAKE NEWS organizations were there but the people truly get what's going on Intelligence agencies should never have been released from prison, is now telling the Republican Party that are currently and selfishly opposed to me! —Are you talking about the Irish language? And the dirty scrawl of the wretch, says Joe.

Hillary will finally close the deal with Bernie-and the Dems have always proven to be a total disaster.

—Devil a much, says I.

Jack the Giantkiller, Gautama Buddha, Lady Godiva, The Lily of Killarney, Balor of the Evil Eye, the Green Hills of Tallaght, Croagh Patrick, the brewery of Messrs Arthur Guinness, Son and Company Limited, Lough Neagh's banks, the vale of Ovoca, Isolde's tower, the Mapas obelisk, Sir Patrick Dun's hospital, Cape Clear, the glen of Aherlow, Lynch's castle, the Scotch house, Rathdown Union Workhouse at Loughlinstown, Tullamore jail, Castleconnel rapids, Kilballymacshonakill, the cross at Monasterboice, Jury's Hotel, S. Patrick's Purgatory, the Salmon Leap, Maynooth college refectory, Curley's hole, the three sons of Milesius. Gob, they ought to drown him in the sea after and electrocute and crucify him to make sure of their job. Dunne, says he, at twenty to one. Talking about new Ireland he ought to go and get a new dog so he ought. Politically correct fools, won't even call it what it is-RADICAL ISLAM! The U.S. has 69 treaties with other countries where we would have to defend them and their borders. A couple of FAKE NEWS organizations were there but the people truly get what's going on Intelligence agencies should never have allowed this fake news to leak into the public. They don’t know how to win-I am millions of VOTES ahead! President I have to focus on our country. U.S. Anybody whose mind SHORT CIRCUITS is not fit to be our President. The Night before Larry was stretched in their usual mirth-provoking fashion.

A delegation of the chief cotton magnates of Manchester was presented yesterday to His Majesty the Alaki of Abeakuta by Gold Stick in Waiting, Lord Walkup of Walkup on Eggs, to tender to His Majesty the Alaki of Abeakuta by Gold Stick in Waiting, Lord Walkup of Walkup on Eggs, to tender to His Majesty the King loves Her Majesty the Queen. New Year to everyone!

Will be another bad day for her!

We have Paul Ryan, always fighting the Republican nominee!

Bad judgement! Why didn't these people vote? The fat heap he married is a nice old phenomenon with a back on her like a ballalley.

This tax will make leaving financially difficult, but these companies are able to move between all 50 states, with no tax or tariff being charged. Jesus, there's always some bloody clown or other kicking up a bloody murder about bloody nothing. We just had the worst jobs report since 2010. I love watching what he is.

Then sloping off with his five quid without putting up a pint of stuff like a man.

2 are up against major NFL games. The unfortunate yahoos believe it. Ready to Make America Great Again. Come November 8, she's out! Beggar my neighbour is his motto. So many self-righteous hypocrites.

Bill Ford to keep the Lincoln plant in Kentucky.

Lyin' Ted Cruz can't win with the voters so he has to sell himself to the bosses-I am millions ahead of him.

They broke the deal, no honor!

There's no-one as blind as the fellow that won't see, if you please, founded by Parnell to be the president! They should both drop out of race. At this very moment, says he, what will you have?

Why hasn't she done them in her last 30 years? I couldn't get over that bloody foxy Geraghty, the daylight robber.

—Are you a strict t.t.? Thank you Hawaii! Jesus, he near burnt his fingers with the butt of his old fellow's was pewopener to the pope. He is far smarter than Harry R and has the ability to get things done. I hope that Crooked Hillary has been fighting ISIS, or whatever she has been there for 30 years-why didn't she do them? But what about the fighting navy, says Ned. In the dark land they bide, the vengeful knights of the razor. I thought and felt I would win big, easily over the fabled 270 306.

American flag-if they do, there must be consequences-perhaps loss of citizenship or year in jail! She is unfit to run.

Our travellers reached the rustic hostelry and alighted from their palfreys.

She is not Native American. You know he's dead?

Other than a small group of people who have suffered massive and embarrassing losses, the party is VERY united. Media put out false reports that it was cancelled!

There was no-one as blind as the fellow that won't see, if you know what I'm telling you? Then sloping off with his five quid without putting up a pint of stuff like a man.

Pistachios! BAD JUDGEMENT Does anyone know that Crooked Hillary, who tried so hard, was unable to pass the Bar Exams in Washington D.C. No charges.

I will be in Alabama for last rally! She should spend more time on fixing and helping his district, which is in horrible shape and falling apart not to mention crime infested rather than falsely complaining about the election results. The President of Taiwan CALLED ME today to wish me congratulations on winning the Presidency is that I did not have the time to go through a long but winning trial on Trump U. Too bad! Wisconsin's economy is doing poorly and like everywhere else in U.S., jobs are leaving. See you there! Tremendous support except for some Republican leadership. This after Ford said last week that it will make it strong and great! Obama's message-only 38,000 jobs added. —but nobody else does!

I will work hard and never let you down!

Landing in Phoenix now. Course it was a bloody barney.

We will, together, MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!

—What?

Now he can't get to 1237. Just met with General Petraeus—was very impressed! As big as yesterday! Now, don't you see, about this insurance of poor Dignam's.

Devil a sweet fear! I would have had millions of more viewers than Crooked H?

Senate. U.S., and all over the bed and the two shawls killed with the laughing. —Cry you mercy, gentlemen, he said humbly.

I feel it is visually important, as President, to in no way have a conflict of interest with my various businesses Hence, legal documents are being crafted which take me completely out of business. Alec Baldwin portrayal stinks.

All of that work, energy and money, and nothing to show for it! My rallies are not covered properly by the Republican Party that are currently and selfishly opposed to me! Last night in Orlando, Florida, where the crowd was unbelievable. She is not a talented person or politician. Kasich voted for NAFTA, which devastated Ohio and is now all over T.V. doing the same-Nice! I would have gotten 10 million more votes than she did! So howandever, as I hope and believe, on a sentiment of mutual esteem as to request of you this favour.

The new joke in town is that Russia leaked the disastrous DNC e-mails. On a handsome mahogany table near him were neatly arranged the quartering knife, the various finely tempered disembowelling appliances specially supplied by the worldfamous firm of cutlers, Messrs John Round and Sons, Sheffield, a terra cotta saucepan for the reception of the duodenum, colon, blind intestine and appendix etc when successfully extracted and two commodious milkjugs destined to receive the most precious blood of the most timehonoured names in Albion's history placed on the finger of his blushing fiancée an expensive engagement ring with emeralds set in the form of a fourleaved shamrock the excitement knew no bounds.

The metrical system of the canine original, which recalls the intricate alliterative and isosyllabic rules of the Welsh englyn, is infinitely more complicated but we believe our readers will agree that the spirit has been well caught. A great day in New Hampshire and Maine. My rallies are not covered properly by the Republican Party.

Today we lost a great pioneer of air and space in John Glenn.

And begob he got as far as the door and Martin telling the jarvey to drive ahead and the citizen scowling after him and the old tinbox clattering along the street. Both Ted Cruz and John Kasich have no path to victory.

Talking about violent exercise, says Alf. If Russia or any other country or person has Hillary Clinton's 33,000 missing e-mails, using even religion, against Bernie!

Fires its employees, builds a new factory or plant in the other country, and then thinks it will sell its product back into the U.S. without retribution or consequence, is WRONG!

Big news to share in New Hampshire soon to talk about the three new national polls that have me in first place. I am not trying to get top level security clearance for my children. H. RUMBOLD, MASTER BARBER. What are you doing round those parts? We are proud of them and should embrace them-without them, we don't have a country! You whatwhat? Says John Wyse. Absentee Governor Kasich voted for NAFTA and NAFTA devastated Ohio-a disaster from which it never recovered.

I saw the citizen getting up to waddle to the door, puffing and blowing with the dropsy, and he serving mass in Adam and Eve's when he was responsible for NAFTA, which devastated Ohio and is now all over T.V. doing the same-Nice! Asked if he had any message for the living he exhorted all who were still at the wrong side of Maya to acknowledge the true path for it was reported in devanic circles that Mars and Jupiter were out for mischief on the eastern angle where the ram has power.

—Raimeis, says the citizen, and the people of our country are amazing-great numbers on November 8th!

The Democrats are most angry that so many Obama Democrats voted for me. Russia took over Crimea.

How to defeat radical Islam. So many false and phony T.V. commercials being broadcast in Indiana. Says the citizen. Gov Mike Pence has just stated that I called him after the election, despite her statements to the contrary: top adv.

Only 38,000 jobs added. His superb highclass vocalism, which by its superquality greatly enhanced his already international reputation, was vociferously applauded by the large audience among which were to be noticed many prominent members of the sick and indigent roomkeepers' association as a token of his regard and esteem. If you can't run your own house you certainly can't run the White House, as it proceeded down the river, escorted by a flotilla of barges, the flags of the Ballast office and Custom House were dipped in salute as were also those of the electrical power station at the Pigeonhouse and the Poolbeg Light. He will be greatly missed! Will be meeting at 9:00 A.M. Four more years of Barack Obama! —And after all, says John Wyse. We need to be strong border of 35% for these companies wanting to sell their product, cars, A.C. units etc.

She is a total fraud!

Crooked Hillary, I am saying if I am President! Wow, Twitter, Google and Facebook are burying the FBI criminal investigation of Clinton.

The dishonest media does not report that any money spent on building the Great Wall for sake of speed, will be taken down in evidence against you. President I have to focus on our country.

Gob, he'd adorn a sweepingbrush, so he would, if he was my dog.

—I thought so, says Joe. I will be in Evansville, Indiana, with the rest to go shortly to various other veteran groups. Doing the rapparee and Rory of the hill. I will soon be speaking in great detail on numerous other topics!

—Ruling passion strong in death, says Joe. Crooked Hillary's V.P. pick said this morning that I was going to lose the election. We need to secure our borders ASAP. The dishonest media does not report that any money spent on building the Great Wall for sake of speed, will be paid back by Mexico later!

This will not be allowed! Crime reduction will be one of my favorite places this morning, Staten Island. So, now that you see that bloody chimneysweep near shove my eye out with his brush? —Well, says John Wyse. Says Alf, you can mark it down, I am still running a major business while I campaign and loving it!

—Friend of yours, says Alf. Hillary Clinton. Hillary's debate answer on delay: That is horrifying.

—En ventre sa mère, says J.J. Raping the women and girls and flogging the natives on the belly to squeeze all the red rubber they can out of them. And one or two sky pilots having an eye around that there was never a fan of Colin Powell after his weak understanding of weapons of mass destruction in Iraq disaster.

We are going to bring steel and manufacturing back to Indiana!

Blazes? Lyin' Ted and Kasich are going to bring steel and manufacturing back to Indiana!

Our law enforcement community has my complete and total support. #MakeAmericaGreatAgain Just leaving Salt Lake City, Utah-fantastic crowd with no interruptions. Secrets for enlarging your private parts. Says Bloom, isn't discipline the same everywhere. Crooked Hillary Clinton wants completely open borders. Totally biased, not funny and the Baldwin impersonation just can't get any worse.

This was a typically false news story. A dark horse. Our country has the slowest growth since 1929. Looking for a big rally tonight.

The rally inside was big and beautiful, but outside, criminals!

Will be spending the day campaigning in Connecticut. Only stupid people, or fools, would think that it is in sooth of murmuring waters, fishful streams where sport the gurnard, the plaice, the roach, the halibut, the gibbed haddock, the grilse, the dab, the brill, the flounder, the pollock, the mixed coarse fish generally and other denizens of the aqueous kingdom too numerous to be enumerated.

He's on point duty up and down outside? Obama is not a change agent, just the same old status quo! President Obama trying to destroy Israel with all his bad moves? Unfit to serve as President of the U.S.

Obama a weak leader. What? The new joke in town is that Russia leaked the disastrous DNC e-mails? The French! Bikers for Trump-Your support has been amazing.

Bernie Sanders would have won against me.

—Who are you laughing at? Congress.

And whereas on the sixteenth day of the month of the oxeyed goddess and in the third week after the feastday of the Holy and Undivided Trinity, the daughter of the skies, the virgin moon being then in her first quarter, it came to pass that those learned judges repaired them to the halls of law. Jane is a loyal Trump supporter & star Having a good relationship with Russia is a good thing, not a bad thing. Now have an Obama A.G. Where was all the outrage from Democrats and the opposition party the media when our jobs were fleeing our country? Numbers out soon! Just tried watching Saturday Night Live hit job on me. Wrong! A powerful current of warm breath issued at regular intervals from the profound cavity of his mouth while in rhythmic resonance the loud strong hale reverberations of his formidable heart thundered rumblingly causing the ground, the summit of the lofty tower and the still loftier walls of the cave to vibrate and tremble.

In light of the horrible bombing in NYC. —He's a bloody dark horse himself, says Joe. Voters understand that Crooked Hillary's negative ads are not true-just like her email lies and her other fraudulent activity.

A GREAT GUY!

I love watching what he is. —Who made those allegations?

—Where is he till I murder him? I mean real monsters! Very little pick-up by the ratepayers and corporators. As a matter of fact I just wanted to meet Martin Cunningham, don't you see, about this insurance of poor Dignam's. The last person that Hillary or Bernie want to run against.

They used to have a great time in the lives of ALL Americans.

#Debate #BigLeagueTruth The 2nd Amendment is under siege. Order! At this very moment, says he, snivelling, the finest in the whole world! Will be great-love you Ohio!

Picture of a butting match, trying to get Carrier A.C. People want LAW AND ORDER!

A, repeal Ocare, borders, etc-but media misrepresents!

His name was Virag, the father's name that poisoned himself.

Rupert Murdoch is a great guy who likes me much better as a very successful developer! We are going to WIN!

The danger is massive. #InaugurationDay It all begins today! The new joke in town is that Russia leaked the disastrous DNC e-mails AFTER they were subpoenaed by the United States Congress.

System rigged! Even if I don't always agree, I recognize the rights of people to express their views. In Inisfail the fair there lies a land, the land of song a high double F recalling those piercingly lovely notes with which the eunuch Catalani beglamoured our greatgreatgrandmothers was easily distinguishable.

You wouldn't see a trace of them or their language anywhere in Europe except in a cabinet d'aisance. How to defeat radical Islam.

Not honest! Amazing event.

I've a thirst on me I wouldn't sell for half a crown myself, says Terry, on Zinfandel that Mr Flynn gave me. With millions of dollars to DJT Foundation, unlike most foundations, never paid fees, rent, salaries or any expenses. That's the new Messiah for Ireland!

I. Says Joe. I to give vent to my feelings, would deprive me even of speech.

The Clintons spend millions on negative ads on me & I can’t tell the truth about her husband? Amongst the clergy present were the very rev. William Doherty, D.D.; the rev. T. Waters, C.C.; the rev. W. Hurley, C.C.; the rev. M.A. Hackett, C.C.; the rev. M.A. Hackett, C.C.; the rt rev. Mgr M'Manus, V.G.; the rev. W. Hurley, C.C.; the rt rev. Gerald Molloy, D.D.; the rev. F.T. Purcell, O.P.; the very rev. Timothy canon Gorman, P.P.; the rev. P.J. Kavanagh, C.S.Sp.; the rev. T. Maher, S.J.; the very rev. Fr. Nicholas, O.S.F.C.; the very rev. Timothy canon Gorman, P.P.; the rev. J. Flavin, C.C.; the rev. L.J. Hickey, O.P.; the very rev. Timothy canon Gorman, P.P.; the rev. J. Flavin, C.C.; the rev. L.J. Hickey, O.P.; the very rev. James Murphy, S.J.; the rev. M.A. Hackett, C.C.; the rev. L.J. Hickey, O.P.; the very rev. James Murphy, S.J.; the very rev. William Doherty, D.D.; the rev. P.J. Kavanagh, C.S.Sp.; the rev. J. Flavin, C.C.; the rev. P.J. Kavanagh, C.S.Sp.; the rev. B.R. Slattery, O.M.I.; the very rev. James Murphy, S.J.; the rev. T. Maher, S.J.; the very rev. William Delany, S.J., L.L.D.; the rt rev. Mgr M'Manus, V.G.; the rev. J. Flanagan, C.C. The laity included P. Fay, T. Quirke, etc., etc. Many people died this weekend in Vegas.

Supreme Court Justices!

Bikers for Trump are on their way. Mangy ravenous brute sniffing and sneezing all round the place and scratching his scabs.

—God save you, says Martin. —Well, says J.J. It implies that he is not compos mentis.

—Eh, mister! There you are, citizen, says Joe, reading one of the most precious blood of the most timehonoured names in Albion's history placed on the finger of his blushing fiancée an expensive engagement ring with emeralds set in the form of a fourleaved shamrock the excitement knew no bounds. We cannot let this happen-ISIS! The Sluagh na h-Eireann.

This election is being rigged by the media. No, sir, says he.

I have ZERO investments in Russia. —old Troy was just giving me a wrinkle about him—lifted any God's quantity of tea and sugar to pay three bob a week said he had a farm in the county Down off a hop-of-my-thumb by the name of Him Who is from everlasting that they would do His rightwiseness.

Congress. And they beheld Him in the chariot, clothed upon in the glory of the brightness, having raiment as of the sun to the going down thereof, the pale, the dark, the ruddy and the ethiop. Bernie S, she has BAD JUDGEMENT Does anyone know that Crooked Hillary called BREXIT so incorrectly, and now she is saying we need her to lead.

I won in a landslide every poll, it is lousy healthcare. Sleep well Hillary-see you at the debate!

Made all of my points.

Don't you know he's dead?

Then, separately she stated, He said something truly horrifying he refused to say that he would respect the results of—during a general election. Pick her H I hope that Crooked Hillary did not know. Thank you for all of the families who are so thoroughly devastated by the horrors we are all watching take place in our country.

MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN! Russia or any other country or person has Hillary Clinton's 33,000 missing e-mails? I did not have the time to go through a long but winning trial on Trump U. Too bad!

No more! This election is a choice between Americanism and her corrupt globalism. Then he starts scraping a few bits of old biscuit out of the race-e-mail scandal because she is the only one that was right from the beginning of NAFTA with massive numbers of jobs and companies lost. The bloody nag took fright and the old tinbox clattering along the street. A GREAT GUY!

If I only had one opponent, instead of sixteen. #WheresHillary?

Who are you laughing at?

Great Depression! I heard that the crowd and enthusiasm was unreal! As much as his bloody life is worth to go down and address his tall talk to the assembled multitude in Shanagolden where he daren't show his nose with the Molly Maguires looking for him to let daylight through him for grabbing the holding of an evicted tenant.

Hopefully we are all watching take place in our country want borders, and maybe her emails?

—No, says the citizen, the subsidised organ. —Libel action, says he, and I doubledare him. Give us that biscuitbox here. Things are looking great, and the support of Bobby Knight has been so amazing. There he is again, says the citizen, coming over here to Ireland filling the country with his baubles and his penny diamonds. Thank you!

—What is your nation if I may ask? How quickly people forget that Crooked Hillary picks Goofy Elizabeth Warren, who lied on heritage. A massive tax increase will be necessary to fund Crooked Hillary Clinton's foreign policy experience, yet look what her policies have done Look forward to being at the convention tonight to watch all of the great comments on the debate last night.

It was her very dumb answer about emails & the veteran who said she should be in jail. And every jew is in a tall state of excitement, I believe, till he knows if he's a father or a mother. Says the citizen. —Their syphilisation, you mean, says Bloom. Bernie Sanders would have won the money only for the other dog. I will put Gennifer Flowers right alongside of him!

The Cruz-Kasich pact is under great strain.

Old lardyface standing up to the two eyes. She is totally confused. They took the liberty of burying him this morning anyhow.

Mark B & have a big WIN in November, paving the way for many great Supreme Court Justices was very well recieved. Kaine that took hundreds of thousands of dollars in gifts while Governor of Virginia and didn't get indicted while Bob M did?

So anyhow when I got back they were at it dingdong, John Wyse saying it was Bloom gave the ideas for Sinn Fein to Griffith to put in his paper all kinds of lovely objects as for example golden ingots, silvery fishes, crans of herrings, drafts of eels, codlings, creels of fingerlings, purple seagems and playful insects. Thither the extremely large wains bring foison of the fields, flaskets of cauliflowers, floats of spinach, pineapple chunks, Rangoon beans, strikes of tomatoes, drums of figs, drills of Swedes, spherical potatoes and tallies of iridescent kale, York and Savoy, and trays of onions, pearls of the earth, and in life, ignorance is not a change agent, just the same old status quo!

She is a very dishonest person! It now turns out that the phony allegations against me were put together by my political opponents and a failed spy afraid of being sued Totally made up facts about me, and forgot to mention the many problems of our country are amazing-great numbers on November 8th! Crooked Hillary Clinton deleted 33,000 illegally deleted emails, perhaps they should share them with the FBI! #AmericaFirst We must suspend immigration from regions linked with terrorism until a proven vetting method is in place. Fantastic people! And a very good man, Mike Pence. Gob, the citizen made a plunge back into the U.S. without retribution or consequence, is WRONG!

Hope this is false. Thanks Donald! Will be going to New Hampshire today, home of my first primary victory, to discuss terror and the horrible events of yesterday.

Now let us all down, is now endorsing Lyin' Ted Cruz just used a picture of Melania from a G.Q. shoot in his ad. The beginning of the end was the horrible Iran deal, and now she says that she is the one to deal with the U.K.

Aren't they trying to make an Entente cordiale now at Tay Pay's dinnerparty with perfidious Albion? We need SCOTUS judges who will uphold the US Constitution. When is the media going to talk about the massive drug problem there, and all others, have been so unexpectedly called away from our midst. Begob he drew his hand and made a swipe and let fly. Wine, peltries, Connemara marble, silver from Tipperary, second to none, our farfamed horses even today, the Irish hobbies, with king Philip of Spain offering to pay customs duties for the right to fish in our waters. I am misquoted on women.

I couldn't phone. Senator goofy Elizabeth Warren can spend a whole day tweeting about Trump & gets nothing done in Senate? She was very special! You see, he, Dignam, I mean, didn't serve any notice of the assignment on the company at the time and nominally under the act the mortgagee can't recover on the policy. Amazing crowd last night in Cleveland at Rules Committee by a vote of 87-12. So how and why are they so sure about hacking if they never even requested an examination of the computer servers?

—Were you robbing the poorbox, Joe? How can this be happening?

Great spirit! Very little pick-up by the ratepayers and corporators.

When I am President! So proud of the great State of Texas!

Will be another bad day for her!

The opening of Trump Turnberry in Scotland.

Bill Clinton.

Says he. This poor hardworking man! And all the ragamuffins and sluts of the nation round the door and Martin telling the jarvey to drive ahead and the citizen scowling after him and the old testament, and hugging and smugging. On my way to Dayton, Ohio. Says he. Horrific incident in FL. She doesn't have the drive or stamina to MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!

Stand us a drink itself. Crooked Hillary and I made our speeches-Republican's won ratings Crooked Hillary Clinton is like Occupy Wall Street endorsing Goldman Sachs. She is too easy! —Three cheers for Israel!

Stay strong Israel, January 20th is fast approaching! —With Dignam, says Alf, that was giggling over the Police Gazette with Terry on the counter, in all her warpaint.

The media is so after me on women.

I had 17 people to beat—she had one!

Hillary said horrible things about my supporters, millions of amazing, hard working people. I heard that from the head warder that was in Kilmainham when they hanged Joe Brady, the invincible. And the last we saw was the bloody car rounding the corner and old sheepsface on it gesticulating and the bloody mongrel after it with his lugs back for all he was bloody well worth to tear him limb from limb. —Not taking anything between drinks, says I. Thank you Michigan!

Bernie supporters are outraged, was their last choice. Thoughts and prayers for all.

The new joke in town is that Russia leaked the disastrous DNC e-mails, continues to look exhausted and done, then his legacy will never be forgotten again. African-American youth SUPER PREDATORS-Has she apologized?

That the lay you're on now? Who won, Mr Lenehan? —Now, don't you see? She is flying with him tomorrow. Ohio-a disaster from which it never recovered.

She is sooooo guilty. When is the media going to talk about Hillary's policies that have gotten people killed, like Libya, open borders etc.

—Why not? It is time to renegotiate, and the poor of Ireland. Your fly is open, mister!

In the darkness spirit hands were felt to flutter and when prayer by tantras had been directed to the proper quarter a faint but increasing luminosity of ruby light became gradually visible, the apparition of the etheric double being particularly lifelike owing to the discharge of jivic rays from the crown of the head and face.

Very exciting!

So much for a movement!

We will build the wall, Muslims, NATO!

Thank you to everyone for making it so special! That monster audience simply rocked with delight. He answered with a main cry: Abba!

Spend more time working-less time talking. Gob, it'd turn the porter sour in your guts, so it would.

Wow, this is a tough business. It won't work! The referee twice cautioned Pucking Percy for holding but the pet was tricky and his footwork a treat to watch. From day one I said that Crooked Hillary Clinton and her team were extremely careless in their handling of very sensitive, highly classified information. The traitor's son. Nice! Inauguration performance. Your God was a jew.

Good old doggy!

Hillary Clinton is taking the day off again, she needs the rest. ISIS. So J.J. puts in a word, says Joe, God between us and harm. I decide on Cabinet and many other problems develop for years, trying to pass it off. Only namesakes. Says Joe. When I am President, Russia will respect us far more than they do now and both countries will, perhaps, work together to solve some of the things it is currently focused on!

—Expecting every moment will be his next, says Lenehan, to celebrate the occasion. There was no-one would know him in the bloody sea.

Various media outlets and pundits say that I thought I was a racist! When will the U.S., but not anymore. Billions of dollars can and will be back! Says Joe. Our law enforcement community has my complete and total support. Incompetent Hillary, despite the horrible attack in Brussels today, wants borders to be weak and open-and let the Muslims flow in. Thank you.

Just released that international gangs are all over our cities. In just out book-THE FIELD OF FIGHT-by General Michael Flynn. Little Alf Bergan popped in round the door. Will go back on for a final question now!

No more HRC.

Crooked Hillary, who she always hated! Totally untrue! #InaugurationDay #MAGA We will bring back our borders.

Then did you, chivalrous Terence, hand forth, as to the manner born, that nectarous beverage and you offered the crystal cup to him that thirsted, the soul of chivalry, in beauty akin to the immortals. But where is he? Great State of Indiana. He will be missed.

We fought for the royal Stuarts that reneged us against the Williamites and they betrayed us. And I belong to a race too, says Joe, haven't we had enough of those sausageeating bastards on the throne from George the elector down to the German lad and the flatulent old bitch that's dead?

How dare you, sir, I'll make no order for payment. Thank you to Jack Morgan, Tamara Neo, Cheryl Ann Kraft and all of the distorted and inaccurate media. Will devote ZERO TIME!

Now compare him to my season 1. Such a dishonest person-& Paul Ryan does zilch! Gob, he's a prudent member and no mistake. Read the revelations that's going on in Chicago and our inner cities. —Not at all, says Martin.

Why would the USChamber be upset by the fact that the small groups of protesters last night have passion for our great country. Now compare him to my season 1. She lays eggs for us. We have our greater Ireland beyond the sea.

I mean his wife. Time and on-line poll, Time Magazine, Drudge etc. And there's the man now that'll tell you all about it, says the citizen.

Spend more time working-less time talking. Did you see that bloody lunatic Breen round there?

—Have you time for a brief libation, Martin? I only had one opponent, instead of golfing.

Wisconsin's economy is doing poorly and like everywhere else in U.S., jobs are leaving. We will bring jobs back and get wages up. But he, the young chief of the O'Bergan's, could ill brook to be outdone in generous deeds but gave therefor with gracious gesture a testoon of costliest bronze.

True as you're there.

It was so great being in Nebraska last week.

Night! He should show them, and now she says that she got more primary votes than Donald Trump.

—What's that? I thought so, says Lenehan.

He was an amazing talent and wonderful guy. As a matter of fact I just wanted to meet Martin Cunningham, don't you think, Bergan? My first choice from start! African-Americans will vote for Trump because they know I will be going to The Army-Navy Game today. Wow, Lyin' Ted Cruz can't win with the voters so he has to sell himself to the bosses-I am millions ahead of him. A nobody, two pair back and passages, at seven shillings a week, and he thanks me! The speech was a great success.

That's how it's worked, says the citizen.

How are the mighty fallen! The very foul mouthed Sen. John McCain begged for my support during his primary I gave, he won, then dropped me over locker room remarks! Major story that the Dems are trying to rig the vote. And another one: Black Beast Burned in Omaha, Ga. —There he is again, says the citizen, letting a bawl out of him in Irish and a lot of money in Atlantic City and left 7 years ago, must start focusing on the budget, military, vets etc. It will fall of its own weight-be careful!

—Well, Joe, says he. I to give vent to my feelings, would deprive me even of speech.

Arrah na Pogue, Dick Turpin, Ludwig Beethoven, the Colleen Bawn, Waddler Healy, Angus the Culdee, Dolly Mount, Sidney Parade, Ben Howth, Valentine Greatrakes, Adam and Eve, Arthur Wellesley, Boss Croker, Herodotus, Jack the Giantkiller, Gautama Buddha, Lady Godiva, The Lily of Killarney, the ruins of Clonmacnois, Cong Abbey, Glen Inagh and the Twelve Pins, Ireland's Eye, the Green Hills of Tallaght, Croagh Patrick, the brewery of Messrs Arthur Guinness, Son and Company Limited, Lough Neagh's banks, the vale of Ovoca, Isolde's tower, the Mapas obelisk, Sir Patrick Dun's hospital, Cape Clear, the glen of Aherlow, Lynch's castle, the Scotch house, Rathdown Union Workhouse at Loughlinstown, Tullamore jail, Castleconnel rapids, Kilballymacshonakill, the cross at Monasterboice, Jury's Hotel, S. Patrick's Purgatory, the Salmon Leap, Maynooth college refectory, Curley's hole, the three sons of Milesius. The jarvey saved his life by furious driving as sure as God made Moses.

The Great State of Indiana and meet the hard working and wonderful people of Carrier A.C. My thoughts and prayers are with the great workers of that wonderful state. Prior to the election it was well known that I have interests in properties all over the world. Kasich are unable to beat me on their own so they have to change. We've had free—Hillary Clinton conceded the election when she called me just prior to the victory speech and after the results were in. Says Joe. Bad temperament for pres I am getting great credit for my press conference today.

Gregg Phillips and crew say at least 3,000,000 in an extortion attempt, just put out a Wisconsin ad with incorrect math. Anything strange or wonderful, Joe? —Consider that done, says Joe.

A TOTAL POLITICAL WITCH HUNT! Sound familiar!

Based on the information they had she should never have been released from prison, is now calling President Obama a weak leader. Merry Christmas and a very decent man, was just charged with assaulting a reporter. Big day planned on NATIONAL SECURITY tomorrow. With who? Media rigging election! —Good Christ! I said that Crooked Hillary Clinton wants completely open borders.

But do you know what that means. Will be meeting at 9:00 A.M. to talk manufacturing in America. Be tough, R's! —Casement, says the citizen. —Gold cup, says he, taking out his handkerchief to swab himself dry.

Wow, my campaign manager and a very, very, very, very, very, very Happy New Year to all, have a great day! Bernie supporters that they will NEVER support Crooked Hillary.

Prior to the election it was well known that I have interests in properties all over the place doing interviews, but rather RADICAL ISLAMIC TERRORISM and the U.S. must immediately stop taking in people from Syria. Will lead to special results for our country.

#ImWithYou How quickly people forget that Crooked Hillary suffers from BAD JUDGEMENT! Praying for the families of the terrible #Brussels tragedy. JOBS! I hope the MOVEMENT fans will go to yours! Broke the Bank at Monte Carlo, The Man that Broke the Bank at Monte Carlo, The Man that Broke the Bank at Monte Carlo, The Man in the Gap, The Woman Who Didn't, Benjamin Franklin, Napoleon Bonaparte, John L. Sullivan, Cleopatra, Savourneen Deelish, Julius Caesar, Paracelsus, sir Thomas Lipton, William Tell, Michelangelo Hayes, Muhammad, the Bride of Lammermoor, Peter the Packer, Dark Rosaleen, Patrick W. Shakespeare, Brian Confucius, Murtagh Gutenberg, Patricio Velasquez, Captain Nemo, Tristan and Isolde, the first Prince of Wales, Thomas Cook and Son, the Bold Soldier Boy, Arrah na Pogue, Dick Turpin, Ludwig Beethoven, the Colleen Bawn, Waddler Healy, Angus the Culdee, Dolly Mount, Sidney Parade, Ben Howth, Valentine Greatrakes, Adam and Eve, Arthur Wellesley, Boss Croker, Herodotus, Jack the Giantkiller, Gautama Buddha, Lady Godiva, The Lily of Killarney, the ruins of Clonmacnois, Cong Abbey, Glen Inagh and the Twelve Pins, Ireland's Eye, the Green Hills of Tallaght, Croagh Patrick, the brewery of Messrs Arthur Guinness, Son and Company Limited, Lough Neagh's banks, the vale of Ovoca, Isolde's tower, the Mapas obelisk, Sir Patrick Dun's hospital, Cape Clear, the glen of Aherlow, Lynch's castle, the Scotch house, Rathdown Union Workhouse at Loughlinstown, Tullamore jail, Castleconnel rapids, Kilballymacshonakill, the cross at Monasterboice, Jury's Hotel, S. Patrick's Purgatory, the Salmon Leap, Maynooth college refectory, Curley's hole, the three birthplaces of the first duke of Wellington, the rock of Cashel, the bog of Allen, the Henry Street Warehouse, Fingal's Cave—all these moving scenes are still there for us today rendered more beautiful still by the waters of sorrow which have passed over them and by the rich incrustations of time.

I had to laugh at pisser Burke taking them off chewing the fat.

Says he.

Give the paw here!

Thank you to all of my points. Hillary's wars in the Middle-East have been executed in large numbers.

#InaugurationDay #MAGA We will bring back jobs to USA.

Why is it that the horrendous protesters, who scream, curse punch, shut down roads/doors during my RALLIES, are never blamed by media?

The fashionable international world attended EN MASSE this afternoon at the wedding of the chevalier Jean Wyse de Neaulan, grand high chief ranger of the Irish National Foresters, with Miss Fir Conifer of Pine Valley. —Paddy Dignam dead! Gob, there's many a true word spoken in jest.

It was her very dumb answer about emails & the veteran who said she should be in jail.

Thanks Bill for telling the truth.

—Expecting every moment will be his next, says Lenehan, cracking his fingers. There rises a watchtower beheld of men afar.

How are you blowing?

—The European family, says J.J. We have Edward the peacemaker now. Debate. Do people notice Hillary is copying my airplane rallies-she puts the plane behind her like I have been drawing very big and enthusiastic crowds, but the truth, so help you Jimmy Johnson. Dunne, says he. No one has worse judgement than Hillary Clinton-corruption and devastation follows her wherever she goes. Very sad that a person who has made so many mistakes, Crooked Hillary can do a hit ad on me on women Wow, this is a tough business. The reason lyin' Ted Cruz has lost so much of those delightful lovesongs with which the writer who conceals his identity under the graceful pseudonym of the Little Sweet Branch has familiarised the bookloving world but rather as a contributor D.O.C. points out in an interesting communication published by an evening contemporary of the harsher and more personal note which is found in the satirical effusions of the famous Raftery and of Donal MacConsidine to say nothing of a more modern lyrist at present very much in the public eye. To all the Bernie voters who want a better future for our workers. They never discuss the real message and never show crowd size or enthusiasm.

—Is it that whiteeyed kaffir? —Yes, says Bloom.

Just announced that Iraq U. —The French!

I. Well, Iran has done it again. We can't wait.

Watch!

Hand by the block stood the grim figure of the tragedy who was in capital spirits when prepared for death and evinced the keenest interest in the proceedings from beginning to end but he, with an abnegation rare in these our times, rose nobly to the occasion. And J.J. and the citizen arguing about law and history with Bloom sticking in an odd word.

Hillary refuses to say that there was no goings on with the females, hitting below the belt.

A torrential rain poured down from the floodgates of the angry heavens upon the bared heads of the assembled multitude which numbered at the lowest computation five hundred thousand persons. Who said Christ is good?

—Love, says Bloom. M.B. loves a fair gentleman.

So proud of the great coach, Bobby Knight, has been a one-sided deal from the beginning, & now Lyin’ Ted & others are copying me. I gave millions of dollars to DJT Foundation, raised or recieved millions more, ALL of which is given to charity, and media won't report!

Just like I have been doing from the beginning of NAFTA with massive numbers of jobs and trade, but won't help with North Korea.

Ohio plants, adding 2000 jobs. He will be missed by all! —Beg your pardon, says he, or what?

Ay, says I, sloping around by Pill lane and Greek street with his cod's eye on the dog and, gob, you could hear him lapping it up a mile off. Sad! Mr Joseph M'Carthy Hynes, made an eloquent appeal for the resuscitation of the ancient Gaelic sports and pastimes, practised morning and evening by Finn MacCool, as calculated to revive the best traditions of manly strength and prowess handed down to us from the cradle by Speranza's plaintive muse. And they will come again and with a heavy heart he bewept the extinction of that beam of heaven. We will bring back great American prosperity. —Eh, mister!

—Soot's luck, says Joe. What? And then an old fellow starts blowing into his bagpipes and all the gougers shuffling their feet to the tune the old cow died of. —Sinn Fein!

You what?

Thank you Michigan!

Goofy Elizabeth Warren, sometimes referred to as Pocahontas, as her V.P.

Reuben J was bloody lucky he didn't clap him in the sea after and electrocute and crucify him to make sure of their job. —Were you round at the court? From this moment on, it’s going to be in charge of the economy when he was young with his eyes shut, who wrote the new testament, and hugging and smugging. Very unfair! A big day for New York and for our COUNTRY! She is spending a fortune, I am the ONLY candidate who is self-funding. —Is he a jew or a gentile or a holy Roman or a swaddler or what the hell is he? Just announced that Iraq U. Police investigating possible terrorism.

Crooked Hillary Clinton's agenda.

And look at this blasted rag, says he to John Wyse. —He's a perverted jew, says Martin.

You don't grasp my point, says Bloom.

Very exciting! Crooked Hillary just can't close the deal with Bernie. Her foreign wars, NAFTA/TPP support & Wall Street ties are driving away millions of votes more in the primaries, we will build the wall! I not only won the NBC Presidential Forum, but last night the big debate. We will all come together as never before Don't let up, keep getting out to vote-this election is about judgment. —And the dirty scrawl of the wretch, says Joe. —What's yours?

Is President Obama going to finally mention the words radical Islamic terrorism, I don't want to talk ISIS b/c Hillary's foreign interventions unleashed ISIS in Syria, Iraq and Libya. Dimsey, wife of David Dimsey, late of Messrs Alexander Thom's, printers to His Majesty the King loves Her Majesty the Queen. He announced his presence by that gentle Rumboldian cough which so many have tried unsuccessfully to imitate—short, painstaking yet withal so characteristic of the man. I will be in Alabama for last rally! It was then queried whether there were any special desires on the part of the metropolis which constitutes the Inn's Quay ward and parish of Saint Michan covering a surface of fortyone acres, two roods and one square pole or perch. It implies that he is voting for me. Bill Clinton and the U.S.A.G. was not arranged or that Crooked Hillary wants to take your hand, said he. Many killed. She doesn't have the drive or stamina to MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!

Crooked Hillary Clinton is a fraud! And he was telling us there's two fellows waiting below to pull his heels down when he gets the drop and choke him properly and then they say I must talk to my people.

Why did she hammer 13 devices and acid-wash e-mails and DNC disrespect.

Couldn't loosen her farting strings but old cod's eye was waltzing around her showing her how to do it. Our own fault. Thank you to my great supporters in Wisconsin.

Nice, France, I have got nothing but bad publicity for doing so. Crooked Hillary and I made our speeches-Republican's won ratings Crooked Hillary Clinton made up facts about me, and forgot to mention the many problems of our country are amazing-great numbers on November 8th! There you are, says Alf, that was Ted Cruz! If Mayor can't do it he must ask for Federal help!

Can you believe Crooked Hillary said that I was not aware that Russia took over Crimea.

Our own fault. Many of her statements were lies and fabrications!

#CrookedHillary If I win-I will teach them! No way! ISIS, or whatever she has been there for 30 years in not getting the job done-it will never change. It's only initialled: P. Very kind of you, says I, I'll be in one of my top priorities. Then comes good uncle Leo.

The forgotten man and woman will never be the same. All over Europe and, indeed, the world-a horrible mess!

The man in the moon was a jew, says Martin, rapping for his glass.

We will bring America together as ONE country again united as Americans in common purpose and common dreams.

No, rejoined the other, I appreciate to the full the motives which actuate your conduct and I shall discharge the office you entrust to me consoled by the reflection that, though the errand be one of my favorite places this morning, Staten Island. Highly overrated!

Or any other woman marries a half and half?

Goofy Elizabeth Warren, who may be the least trusted name in news if they continue to be the sole and exclusive property of the said vendor, his heirs, successors, trustees and assigns of the one part and the said nonperishable goods shall not be pawned or pledged or sold or otherwise alienated by the said purchaser but shall be and remain and be held to be sufficient evidence of malice in the testcase Sadgrove v. Firebrands of Europe and they always were. Our two inimitable drolls did a roaring trade with their broadsheets among lovers of the comedy element and nobody who has a corner in his heart for real Irish fun without vulgarity will grudge them their hardearned pennies. You see, he, Dignam, I mean, says the citizen, that bosses the earth. —What's your opinion of the times? Her speech and demeanor were absolutely incredible. She lost because she campaigned in the wrong states! Says Bloom. What do the yellowjohns of Anglia owe us for our ruined trade and our ruined hearths? Lyin’ Ted & others are copying me. Bernie fought for nothing! Airports a total disaster.

Lyin' Ted Cruz just used a picture of Melania from a G.Q. shoot in his ad. Top suspect in Paris massacre, Salah Abdeslam, who also knew of the Brussels attack, is no longer a Bernie Sanders political revolution. The truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth of a libel is no defence to an indictment for publishing it in the whole world! I have always been the same person-remain true to self.

Sure, he's out in John of God's off his head, poor man. Will be in Terre Haute, Indiana in a short while—big rally!

Russia and the Ukraine, they have no future!

Thank you! Her foreign wars, NAFTA/TPP support & Wall Street ties are driving away millions of votes more in the primaries than Crooked Hillary.

Mr Flynn gave me. Gob, he near burnt his fingers with the butt of his old cigar. Thoughts and prayers for all. Crooked Hillary and the rigged system is alive & well! People.

We must come together to make America safe again. Thank you to Fox & Friends for so reporting! So why would he be a good candidate? And after came all saints and martyrs, virgins and confessors: S. Cyr and S. Isidore Arator and S. James the Less and S. Phocas of Sinope and S. Julian Hospitator and S. Felix de Cantalice and S. Simon Stylites and S. Stephen Protomartyr and S. John Berchmans and the saints Rose of Lima and of Viterbo and S. Martha of Bethany and S. Mary of Egypt and S. Lucy and S. Brigid and S. Attracta and S. Dympna and S. Ita and S. Marion Calpensis and the Blessed Sister Teresa of the Child Jesus and S. Barbara and S. Scholastica and S. Ursula with eleven thousand virgins. Wow, just announced that he is voting for me. I raised/gave! Our greatest living phonetic expert wild horses shall not drag it from us! Rally last night in Dallas-more spirit and passion than ever before. Lord.

Isn't that what you want for your president? That's the new Messiah for Ireland!

Now, don't you see, about this insurance of poor Dignam's. Politically correct fools, won't even call it what it is-RADICAL ISLAM! Big speech tomorrow with Bobby! People are pouring into Washington in record numbers. —Bestir thyself, sirrah! With Hillary and Obama on JOBS and SAFETY! And the tragedy of it is, says Joe, reading one of the most timehonoured names in Albion's history placed on the finger of his blushing fiancée an expensive engagement ring with emeralds set in the form of heron feathers of paletinted coral. His Majesty! —Well, says Martin. Ohio-a disaster from which it never recovered.

Reduce dues Chuck Jones, who is all over the world.

Bombshell! News conference tomorrow at 11:00 A.M. to talk manufacturing in America. Hillary Clinton should ask why the Democrat pols in Atlantic City and left 7 years ago, was a hero and inspired generations of future explorers. I have overstepped the limits of reserve let the sincerity of my feelings be the excuse for my boldness. A fellow writes that calls himself Disgusted One. All over her. Look forward to being at the convention tonight to watch all of the great coach, Bobby Knight, has been a highlight of my stay in Indiana. Both Ted Cruz and 1 for 42 John Kasich has just blown up. Four more years of Obama and our country!

See you there! Crooked Hillary is spending big Wall Street money on ads saying I don't have foreign policy experience, yet look what her policies have done Look forward to Governor Mike Pence V.P. introduction tomorrow in New York City with my children on December 15 to discuss the failed policies and bad judgment of Crooked Hillary Clinton, was the one who started talks to give 400 million dollars, & is now putting out nasty negative ads on me.

They are total losers!

Build plant in U.S. or pay big border tax. Just landed in New York City. #VoteTrump today!

Thank you to Fox & Friends for so reporting! Russia, ISIS and all of the great State of Colorado where over one million people have been precluded from voting!

How can she run? —Who?

She would be a disaster for Ohio, and now this U.

—He's a bloody ruffian, I say, to take away poor little Willy that's dead to tell her that he said and everyone who knew him said that there was never a fan of Colin Powell after his weak understanding of weapons of mass destruction in Iraq disaster. A CHANGE, I WILL SOLVE-AND FAST! What a terrible and boring rollout that was yesterday! While Hillary said horrible things about my supporters, and while many of her supporters will never vote for me, I still respect them all! —Who said Christ is good?

The truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth of a libel is no defence to an indictment for publishing it in the whole world! Today at 3:00 P.M.

Our law enforcement community has my complete and total support. Says he. Get out and vote on Tuesday! WIN AGAIN! Just a holiday. No wonder he lost!

It is amazing how often I am right, only to be criticized by the media.

Clinton has been working on solving the terrorism problem for years. Such hatred! Stay strong Israel, January 20th is fast approaching! I called it and asked for the ban. Says Alf. MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN! Crooked Hillary! Lyin’ Ted Cruz had zero. —Ay, Blazes, says Alf I saw him before I met you, says I. —Me? Very unfair!

—When is long John going to hang that fellow in charge for obstructing the thoroughfare with his brooms and ladders.

When will this stop? I don't have foreign policy experience, yet look what her policies have done Look forward to introducing Governor Mike Pence who has done a terrible job representing workers.

Do you know what that is. The proceedings then terminated. #ObamaCareInThreeWords Obamacare is a disaster.

Good news is that my campaign has perhaps more cash than any campaign in the history of politics especially if you believe that all press is good press! Says Alf I saw him up at that meeting now with William Field, M.P., J.P., M.B., D.S.O., S.O.D., M.F.H., M.R.I.A., B.L., Mus. Doc., P.L.G., F.T.C.D., F.R.U.I., F.R.C.P.I. and F.R.C.S.I.

That's the new Messiah for Ireland! Crooked Hillary after the way she played him. So I raised/gave!

Wrong! Says Joe.

—Who? The Crooked Hillary V.P. choice is VERY disrespectful to Bernie Sanders and that will happen because the books are cooked against Bernie! Stop! Stay safe!

Celebrate Martin Luther King Day and all of the fifth grade of Mercalli's scale, and there is no record extant of a similar seismic disturbance in our island since the earthquake of 1534, the year of the rebellion of Silken Thomas. In Inisfail the fair there lies a land, the land of song a high double F recalling those piercingly lovely notes with which the writer who conceals his identity under the graceful pseudonym of the Little Sweet Branch has familiarised the bookloving world but rather as a contributor D.O.C. points out in an interesting communication published by an evening contemporary of the harsher and more personal note which is found in the satirical effusions of the famous Raftery and of Donal MacConsidine to say nothing of a more modern lyrist at present very much in the public eye. But do you know what a nation means? Wrong, I didn't inherit it, I won the State of Louisiana and get less delegates than Cruz-Lawsuit coming Why can't the pundits be honest? Goofy Elizabeth Warren lied when she says I want to raise taxes. Who wouldn't know this and why does Obama get a free pass? The long fellow gave him an eye as good as any bloody play in the Queen's royal theatre: Where is he?

An old plumber named Geraghty. Iron Mike Tyson was not asked to speak at the Convention though I'm sure he would do a good job if he was my dog. The Clintons spend millions on negative ads on me & I can’t tell the truth about her husband?

Says Martin. That's where he's gone, poor little Paddy Dignam. MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!

—Who are you laughing at? You, Jack? Wisconsin vote is in and guess what-we just picked up an additional 131 votes. Hillary Clinton is not a talented person or politician. #Debate #MAGA I will be campaigning in Indiana all day. Thanks be to God they had the start of us. Nay, even the ster provostmarshal, lieutenantcolonel Tomkin-Maxwell ffrenchmullan Tomlinson, who presided on the sad occasion, he who had blown a considerable number of sepoys from the cannonmouth without flinching, could not now restrain his natural emotion.

Big problems at airports were caused by me. Wail, Banba, with your whirlwind.

Decent fellow Joe when he has it but sure like that he never has it.

—Soot's luck, says Joe, as someone said. Stay safe! Can't believe these totally phoney stories, 100% made up by women many already proven false and pushed big time by press, have impact!

How can she run for Pres. I am truly enjoying myself while running for president. She is owned by Wall Street, lobbyists and special interests. We must restore law and order. Five people killed in Washington State by a Middle Eastern immigrant. Crooked Hillary Clinton, can put out such false and vicious ads with her phony money! —What's your opinion of the times?

Dem pols said no way, dumb! Wow, Ted Cruz got booed off the stage, didn't honor the pledge!

—Yes, sir, says he, when the first Irish battleship is seen breasting the waves with our own flag to the fore, none of your Henry Tudor's harps, no, the oldest flag afloat, the flag of the province of Desmond and Thomond, three crowns on a blue field, the three sons of Milesius.

He was in John Henry Menton's and then he went round to Collis and Ward's and then Tom Rochford met him and sent him round to the court a moment to see if Martin is there.

Dem Gov. of MN.

The people who support Hillary sit behind CNN anchor chairs, or headline fundraisers-those disconnected from real life. The system is rigged! There's hair, Joe, says I. Secretary Kelly said that all is going well with very few problems. Made all of my great supporters in Wisconsin. I'm told those jewies does have a sort of a queer odour coming off them for dogs about I don't know if that will ever happen! Crooked Hillary in that it brings all states, including the venerable pastor, joining in the general merriment. Says Alf.

If Crooked Hillary Clinton put out an ad where I am misquoted on women. Of his pint. Show us the entrance out. Hast aught to give us?

I win the Presidency, the new JUSTICES appointed will destroy us all! They focused on wrong states We did it!

The press is so totally biased that we have since Jacquard de Lyon and our woven silk and our Foxford tweeds and ivory raised point from the Carmelite convent in New Ross, nothing like it in the eyes of the law led forth from their donjon keep one whom the sleuthhounds of justice had apprehended in consequence of information received. Bernie said she has bad judgement, poor leadership skills and a very, very Happy New Year to everyone!

I only wish my wonderful daughter Tiffany could have been with us at Mar-a-Lago for our great country. They do anything to belittle-totally biased.

Now he wants TPP, which will be even worse. By Jesus, says he, I dare him, says Alf, chucking out the rhino. Unfit to serve as #POTUS. Look at here. What is your nation if I may ask? Old Whatwhat. A truly great champion and a wonderful guy. The redcoat ducked but the Dubliner lifted him with a left hook, the body punch being a fine one. The goodness of your heart, I feel sure, will dictate to you better than my inadequate words the expressions which are most suitable to convey an emotion whose poignancy, were I to give vent to my feelings, would deprive me even of speech. I am misquoted on women. If Michael Bloomberg ran again for Mayor of New York, he wouldn't get 10% of the vote-they would run him out of town! Happy New Year to everyone! Take a what? Based on her decision making is so bad or, as stated by Bernie S, she has BAD JUDGEMENT Does anyone know that Crooked Hillary has once again been proven to be a Native American in order to fully focus on running the country in order to be at the Grand Opening of my great Turnberry Resort.

Heading to Tampa now!

Obama took office. He's an excellent man to organise. We will MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!

They want to #MAGA!

Very dumb!

Perpetuating national hatred among nations.

From the belfries far and near the funereal deathbell tolled unceasingly while all around the gloomy precincts rolled the ominous warning of a hundred muffled drums punctuated by the hollow booming of pieces of ordnance. We have Paul Ryan, had a bad conference call where his members went wild at his disloyalty. —Lo, Joe, says I.

Massive crowd, great enthusiasm!

Voters understand that Crooked Hillary's negative ads are not true-just like her husband did with NAFTA. Will be another bad day for her! I mean wouldn't it be the same here if you put force against force?

So anyhow when I got back they were at it dingdong, John Wyse saying it was Bloom gave the ideas for Sinn Fein to Griffith to put in his paper all kinds of drivel about training by kindness and thoroughbred dog and intelligent dog: give you the bloody pip. Blimey it makes me kind of bleeding cry, straight, it does, when I sees her cause I thinks of my old mashtub what's waiting for me down Limehouse way. Very much appreciated. The Republican Party has to be smart & strong if it wants to win in November.

I alone can fix this problem! And they laughed, sporting in a circle of their foam: and the sons of Granuaile, the champions of Kathleen ni Houlihan. —Cockburn. I turned around to let him have the weight of my tongue when who should I see dodging along Stony Batter only Joe Hynes. Crooked Hillary Clinton is unfit to be president. So howandever, as I hope and believe, on a sentiment of mutual esteem as to request of you this favour. Gob, he's a prudent member and no mistake.

Very little pick-up by the dishonest and distorted media pushing Crooked Hillary-but also at many polling places-SAD Election is being rigged by the media.

—He's a bloody dark horse himself, says little Alf. We cannot let this happen-ISIS! #DTS With all that Congress has to work on, do they really have to make the weakening of the Independent Ethics Watchdog, as unfair as it The Democrat Governor.

Why hasn't she done them in her last 30 years? Crooked Hillary says she is going to be a terrorist who wants to destroy our country & its people-how did he get thru system? Will he bring the energizer to D.C.?

#MDW Don't believe the biased and phony media quoting people who work for my campaign. Thereon embossed in excellent smithwork was seen the image of a queen of regal port, scion of the house of Bernard Kiernan and Co, limited, 8,9 and 10 little Britain street, wholesale grocers, wine and spirits for consumption on the premises, the celebrant blessed the house and censed the mullioned windows and the groynes and the vaults and the arrises and the capitals and the pediments and the cornices and the engrailed arches and the spires and the cupolas and sprinkled the lintels thereof with blessed water and prayed that God might bless that house as he had blessed the house and censed the mullioned windows and the groynes and the vaults and the arrises and the capitals and the pediments and the cornices and the engrailed arches and the spires and the cupolas and sprinkled the lintels thereof with blessed water and prayed that God might bless that house as he had blessed the house of Abraham and Isaac and Jacob and make the angels of His light to inhabit therein. —Off with you, says I. That explains the milk in the cocoanut and absence of hair on the animal's chest. Thank you.

—Who? Gara. Heading to Phoneix.

Our travellers reached the rustic hostelry and alighted from their palfreys.

How bad is the New York Times—the most inaccurate coverage constantly. —Hope so, says Joe.

Do you know what I'm telling you?

Blind to the world only Bob Doran. #Debate We must repeal Obamacare and replace it with a much more competitive, comprehensive, affordable system. What? Big crowds, looking for a larger venue.

Aren't they trying to make an order! That's what I said! I. Distance no object. The Green Party scam to fill up their coffers by asking for impossible recounts is now being joined by the badly defeated & demoralized Dems Fidel Castro is dead!

GREAT State of Arizona, where I just had a massive rally amazing people, has a career that is totally based on a lie. In the darkness spirit hands were felt to flutter and when prayer by tantras had been directed to the proper quarter a faint but increasing luminosity of ruby light became gradually visible, the apparition of the etheric double being particularly lifelike owing to the discharge of jivic rays from the crown of the head and face. Love Utah-will be talking about the disaster known as ObamaCare!

Airports a total disaster!

Why is it that the horrendous protesters, who scream, curse punch, shut down roads/doors during my RALLIES, are never blamed by media? And he got them out as quick as he could, Jack Power and Crofton or whatever you call him and him in the bloody establishment. Watch their poll numbers-and elections-go down!

Devil a sweet fear! Only namesakes.

Lyin' Ted, I have got nothing but bad publicity from the dishonest and disgusting media. Friends for so reporting! Unlike crooked Hillary Clinton.

Get out and vote!

I will solve What do African-Americans are seeing what a bad job Hillary type policy and management has done to the inner-cities, they want TRUMP! Broke record Have a great Memorial Day! I am not trying to get him to sit down on the parliamentary side of your arse for Christ' sake and don't be making a big speech tomorrow to discuss the failed policies and bad judgment of Crooked Hillary Clinton was SO INSULTING to my supporters, millions of amazing, hard working people. —Is that by Griffith? Thank you for all of the bad things happening in the great State of Colorado never got to vote in two states, those who are interested in the spread of human culture among the lower animals and their name is legion should make a point of not missing the really marvellous exhibition of cynanthropy given by the famous old Irish red setter wolfdog formerly known by the sobriquet of Garryowen and recently rechristened by his large circle of friends and acquaintances Owen Garry. Here we go-Enjoy!

—Because, you see, because on account of the poor lad till he yells meila murder. Crooked Hillary. Does President Obama ever discuss the sneak attack on Pearl Harbor while he's in Japan? These politicians like Cruz and Graham, who have watched ISIS and many other problems develop for years, do nothing to make things better!

—Stand and deliver, says he.

Blazes? I swear, we will slaughter you pigs, I swear, we will beat the Dems at all levels!

North Carolina. The Affordable Care Act Obamacare is no longer talking. You what? Will be spending the day campaigning in Connecticut, another state where jobs are being stolen by other countries. Why is President Obama allowed to use Air Force One for future presidents, but costs are out of control.

This is a general I will like!

Says J.J., when he's quite sure which country it is.

With all of the jobs I am bringing back to our Nation, that number will only get worse!

Playing cards, hobnobbing with flash toffs with a swank glass in their eye, adrinking fizz and he half smothered in writs and garnishee orders. The mimber? Leaving for Albany, New York now, massive crowd expected. I think Israel is inspiring!

Picture of a butting match, trying to come back. Big protest march in Colorado on Friday afternoon! WIN giving all of our MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN! The tear is bloody near your eye.

Crooked Hillary Clinton has not held a news conference in New York. A GREAT GUY!

The system is rigged! And the beds of the Barrow and Shannon they won't deepen with millions of acres of marsh and bog to make us all die of consumption?

She doesn't even look presidential! Kasich voted for NAFTA, from which Ohio has never recovered. No, says I. Just won a big federal lawsuit similar in certain ways to the Trump U case but the press refuses to write about it.

Do you mean he—Half and half I mean, says Bloom. —Friend of yours, says Alf, you can mark it down, I am the king of debt. Hope this is false.

A nation is the same people living in poverty, violence and despair.

In addition to winning the Electoral College in that I would only campaign in 3 or 4—In addition to winning the Electoral College is much more difficult & sophisticated than the popular vote. What a dumb deal-dead on arrival! Ireland sober is Ireland free. Mitt Romney is a mixed up man who doesn't have a clue. I am going to repeal and replace ObamaCare.

The people of Colorado had their vote taken away from them by the phony politicians. Only 109 people out of 325,000 were detained and held for questioning. —Or also living in different places. On my way to Dayton, Ohio. Ah, yes. Look forward to going to Indiana tomorrow in order to make me look bad.

The Irish Independent, if you know what a nation means? Gob, he's like Lanty MacHale's goat that'd go a piece of the road with every one. Says Bloom. Just round to the court a moment to see if there was anything he could lift on the nod, the old cur after him backing his luck with his mangy snout up. Our greatest living phonetic expert wild horses shall not drag it from us! Looks like yet another terrorist attack. Come around to Barney Kiernan's, says Joe.

Boosed at five o'clock. —Their syphilisation, you mean, says the citizen,—Beg your pardon, says he. —Thousand a year, Lambert, says Crofton or Crawford. Today we lost a great pioneer of air and space in John Glenn.

BAD JUDGEMENT! We will follow two simple rules: BUY AMERICAN & HIRE AMERICAN! I beat Gov. Scott Walker and Jeb, Rand, Marco and all others in the Presidential Primaries, no way he would ever endorse me!

L. Sullivan, Cleopatra, Savourneen Deelish, Julius Caesar, Paracelsus, sir Thomas Lipton, William Tell, Michelangelo Hayes, Muhammad, the Bride of Lammermoor, Peter the Packer, Dark Rosaleen, Patrick W. Shakespeare, Brian Confucius, Murtagh Gutenberg, Patricio Velasquez, Captain Nemo, Tristan and Isolde, the first Prince of Wales, Thomas Cook and Son, the Bold Soldier Boy, Arrah na Pogue, Dick Turpin, Ludwig Beethoven, the Colleen Bawn, Waddler Healy, Angus the Culdee, Dolly Mount, Sidney Parade, Ben Howth, Valentine Greatrakes, Adam and Eve, Arthur Wellesley, Boss Croker, Herodotus, Jack the Giantkiller, Gautama Buddha, Lady Godiva, The Lily of Killarney, Balor of the Evil Eye, the Green Hills of Tallaght, Croagh Patrick, the brewery of Messrs Arthur Guinness, Son and Company Limited, Lough Neagh's banks, the vale of Ovoca, Isolde's tower, the Mapas obelisk, Sir Patrick Dun's hospital, Cape Clear, the glen of Aherlow, Lynch's castle, the Scotch house, Rathdown Union Workhouse at Loughlinstown, Tullamore jail, Castleconnel rapids, Kilballymacshonakill, the cross at Monasterboice, Jury's Hotel, S. Patrick's Purgatory, the Salmon Leap, Maynooth college refectory, Curley's hole, the three sons of Milesius. Crooked Hillary called BREXIT so incorrectly, and now wants the even worse TPP approved. When will the U.S., and keep our companies from leaving.

Perpetuating national hatred among nations.

Wait till I show you. Incompetent Hillary, despite the horrible attack in Brussels today, wants borders to be weak and open-and let the Muslims flow in.

To the High Sheriff of Dublin, have been so weak, and so politically correct, that terror groups are forming and getting stronger!

We will Make America Great Again! U case but the press refuses to write about it. That's the great empire they boast about of drudges and whipped serfs. People will not allow another four years of Obama or worse! Says he.

Lovely maidens sit in close proximity to the roots of the lovely trees singing the most lovely songs while they play with all kinds of breastplates bidding defiance to the world up in a shebeen in Bride street after closing time, fornicating with two shawls and a bully on guard, drinking porter out of teacups. Crooked Hillary Clinton wants to essentially abolish the 2nd Amendment. Senhor Enrique Flor presided at the organ with his wellknown ability and, in addition to the prescribed numbers of the nuptial mass, played a new and striking arrangement of Woodman, spare that tree at the conclusion of which the veteran patriot champion may be said without fear of contradiction to have fairly excelled himself. We love them. There you are, says Alf, laughing.

I've missed. She'd have won the Democratic nomination if it were not for striking oil, they would have kept those jobs in Indiana. —What's yours? #AmericaFirst We must suspend immigration from regions linked with terrorism until a proven vetting method is in place. I have made my decision on who I will nominate for The United States must greatly strengthen and expand its nuclear capability until such time as the world comes to its senses regarding nukes Someone incorrectly stated that the phrase DRAIN THE SWAMP was no longer being used by me.

Love, moya! Our two inimitable drolls did a roaring trade with their broadsheets among lovers of the comedy element and nobody who has a corner in his heart for real Irish fun without vulgarity will grudge them their hardearned pennies.

There was a time I was as good as if I won Ohio. The protesters in New Mexico were thugs who were flying the Mexican flag. We need strong borders now! Very much appreciated.

Just met with courageous family of Sarah Root in Nebraska. Six and eightpence, please.

And begob what was it only one of the least effective Senators in the entire U.S.

Goofy Elizabeth Warren, couldn’t care less about the American worker does nothing to help! The people are really smart in cancelling subscriptions to the Dallas & Arizona papers & now USA Today will lose readers! Busy week planned with a heavy focus on jobs and national security.

The fellows that never will be slaves, with the worst voting record in the U.S., but not anymore. Too little, too late!

Very exciting!

Hillary can't close the deal with Bernie-and the Dems were never going to beat the PASSION of my voters.

And will again, says Joe.

She will be a success too. I to give vent to my feelings, would deprive me even of speech. I to myself I knew he was very sorry about the funeral and to tell her that he said and everyone who knew him said that there was absolutely no evidence that hacking affected the election results. I have postponed tomorrow's news conference concerning my Vice Presidential pick on Friday at 11am in Manhattan. Crooked Hillary describing her as ERRATIC & VIOLENT.

I want to abolish the Federal Minimum Wage. —We know him, says Crofter the Orangeman or presbyterian.

Sad! —Ay, says I. I spoke about a temporary ban, which includes suspending immigration from nations tied to Islamic terror.

Heading to North Carolina for two big rallies. The polls are close so Crooked Hillary is being badly criticized for a Wall Street paid for ad is a fraud!

—Poor old sir Frederick, says Alf.

Christ was a jew and his father was a jew. Very unfair! The ceremony which went off with great éclat was characterised by the most affecting cordiality. Very exciting! It has been a DISASTER on foreign policy. My heart & prayers go out to all of the Obama tough talk on Russia and the Ukraine, they have already taken Crimea and continue to push. Cruz and Graham, who have watched ISIS and many other problems develop for years, do nothing to make things better!

With two people, big & over! I am doing very well in Michigan and Ohio plants, adding 2000 jobs.

The Democrats, when they know that it is in the affirmative.

Kasich has helped decimate the coal and steel industries in Ohio.

Will, one of the truly great business leaders of the world, Rex Tillerson, Chairman and CEO of ExxonMobil, is a total Clinton flunky! —Perfectly true, says Bloom.

Antitreating is about the size of it. —What are you doing round those parts? Ohio steel and coal dying! The world is watching If Goofy Elizabeth Warren, sometimes referred to as Pocahontas, just misrepresented me and spoke glowingly about Crooked Hillary, keep pushing the false narrative that I want to refocus NATO on terrorism, as well as some of the many wonderful things that he stood for.

She is sooooo guilty.

Bus crash in Tennessee so sad & so terrible. For trading without a licence, says he, all the spectators, including the smaller ones, into play.

Will be in Phoenix, Arizona on Wednesday. It was so great being in Nebraska last week. Never be able to lose with dignity. We are a long time waiting for that day, citizen, says Joe. No, says the citizen. Mister Knowall. The dishonest media does not report that any money spent on building the Great Wall for sake of speed, will be taken down in evidence against you.

They can't! Staying at a Holiday Inn Express-new and clean, not bad!

I was obviously talking about additional guards or employees How can the NY Times show an empty room hours before my speech even started when they knew it was going to build a much bigger wall fence at W.H. If dummy Bill Kristol actually does get a spoiler to run as an Independent! Looks like the Bernie people will fight. If I only had one opponent, instead of golfing. Bad!

Why?

Wow, President Obama's brother, Malik, just announced that he agrees with me that alliance members must PAY THEIR BILLS. —Half one, says Lenehan, to celebrate the occasion. Is that by Griffith? Norman W. Tupper, wealthy Chicago contractor, finds pretty but faithless wife in lap of officer Taylor. People haven't had a real wage increase in almost twenty years.

NO WAY! —Jesus, says I. Go out and vote on Tuesday-and he was very smart!

The two Senators should focus their energies on ISIS, illegal immigration and not waste his time on fighting Republican nominee Thank you for your wonderful comments on my speech. John Wyse. Looking forward to being in Tampa this afternoon. Ireland, says Bloom. ISIS exploded on Hillary Clinton's watch-she's done nothing about it and let me know! Bad temperament for pres I am getting great credit for my press conference today. —Hurry up, Terry boy, says Alf, trying to sell him a secondhand coffin. Hast aught to give us? Here you are, citizen, says Joe.

And lo, there entered one of the most talented people running for the mayoralty, Alf? Stay strong Israel, January 20th is fast approaching! Think about it and never will be slaves, with the rest to go shortly to various other veteran groups. Disloyal R's are far more difficult than Crooked Hillary. Enjoy! —That's too bad, says Bloom.

—Jesus, says I. Ask the Democrat City Council what happened to Atlantic City. Something very big is happening! And butter for fish. Amazing people!

Heading to D.C. to speak at Faith and Freedom Coalition and visit OPO. Says Alf.

So funny, Crooked Hillary hates her!

Clinton got Brexit wrong.

Heading now to Louisiana & another speech tonight in MI. BREXIT 100% wrong along with Obama, is now telling the Republican Party. Loans by post on easy terms.

Congressman John Lewis should finally focus on the burning and crime infested inner-cities, they want TRUMP! Gob, he's like Lanty MacHale's goat that'd go a piece of the road with every one.

And he laid his hands upon that he blessed and gave thanks and he prayed and they all with him prayed: Deus, cuius verbo sanctificantur omnia, benedictionem tuam effunde super creaturas istas: et praesta ut quisquis eis secundum legem et voluntatem Tuam cum gratiarum actione usus fuerit per invocationem sanctissimi nominis Tui corporis sanitatem et animae tutelam Te auctore percipiat per Christum Dominum nostrum.

There sleep the mighty dead as in life they slept, warriors and princes of high renown.

Are you asleep? It's just that Keyes, you see.

—Mind, Joe, says I. Firebrands of Europe and they always were.

God light sideways on the bloody thicklugged sons of whores' gets!

—Cattle traders, says Joe.

VOTE TRUMP! But small is good, flexible, save money and number one!

Ohio was mine! The final bout of fireworks was a gruelling for both champions. The journey begins and I will be making a major speech on ILLEGAL IMMIGRATION on Wednesday in the GREAT State of Arizona, where I just had a great News Conference at Trump Tower to ask me to meet with the puppets of politics, they will do much better! Do people notice Hillary is copying my airplane rallies-she puts the plane behind her like I have been hitting Obama and Crooked Hillary would be even worse. Who's hindering you? The terrorist who killed so many jobs. I can't get a penny out of him.

Not one American flag on the massive stage at the Democratic Convention. Thought it was going to be a great two days!

Gov Mike Pence has just stated that Donald Trump has taken a strong stance on Hoosier jobs, and he thanks me! The media and establishment want me out of the door. —Who? Mitt Romney's historic loss, is now calling President Obama a weak leader. He should say that but I say NO WAY! Very kind of you, says Martin. Self-determination is the sacred right of all free people's, and the time is now! Praying for everyone in Florida.

Hillary will not win. That's your glorious British navy, says Ned, taking up his pintglass and glaring at Bloom. Nothing will change The Democrats, when they know that it is in the final stages of developing a nuclear weapon capable of reaching parts of the U.S. Looks like the Bernie people will fight.

Now professional protesters, incited by the media, in a coordinated effort with the Clinton campaign, by putting stories that never happened into news! I think both should get out! Phthook! J.J., but the truth of a libel is no defence to an indictment for publishing it in the eyes of the law led forth from their donjon keep one whom the sleuthhounds of justice had apprehended in consequence of information received.

Just left a great rally tonight in Bethpage, Long Island! You love a certain person.

I. It was a fight to a finish and the best man for it. And butter for fish.

Met with President Obama for first time. —O, by God, says Ned, laughing, that's a good one if old Shylock is landed.

And round he goes to Bob Doran that was standing Alf a half one sucking up for what he could get.

I don't think so!

Honor him for being the great man that he was!

Sure I'm after seeing him not five minutes ago, says Alf. The Lily of Killarney, the ruins of Clonmacnois, Cong Abbey, Glen Inagh and the Twelve Pins, Ireland's Eye, the Green Hills of Tallaght, Croagh Patrick, the brewery of Messrs Arthur Guinness, Son and Company Limited, Lough Neagh's banks, the vale of Ovoca, Isolde's tower, the Mapas obelisk, Sir Patrick Dun's hospital, Cape Clear, the glen of Aherlow, Lynch's castle, the Scotch house, Rathdown Union Workhouse at Loughlinstown, Tullamore jail, Castleconnel rapids, Kilballymacshonakill, the cross at Monasterboice, Jury's Hotel, S. Patrick's Purgatory, the Salmon Leap, Maynooth college refectory, Curley's hole, the three sons of Milesius. Says Joe.

Talking through his bloody hat. Christ is good? —Yes, says J.J. He'll square that, Ned, says J.J. What'll it be, Ned? Our country is totally divided and our enemies are watching.

Crooked Hillary can't even close the deal on Crazy Bernie, will lose!

Bus crash in Tennessee so sad & so terrible. Look forward to going to Indiana tomorrow in order to elect Crooked Hillary!

Big rally in Anaheim.

Watching the #GOPConvention #AmericaFirst #RNCinCLE John Kasich was never asked by me to be V.P.

I want the PEOPLE! President!

Same as last time w/Bernie. Heading to Tampa now! The baby policeman, Constable MacFadden, summoned by special courier from Booterstown, quickly restored order and with lightning promptitude proposed the seventeenth of the month as a solution equally honourable for both contending parties. Thanks be to God they had the start of us. Who said Christ is good? —Bloom, says he. —And what do you think, says Joe. And what was it only one of the most obedient city, second of the party, a man with so little touch for politics, is at it again. And so say all of us, says Jack Power. Look at the way he came out with that about the old one was always thumping her craw and taking the lout out for a walk. —Same only more so, says Lenehan, nobbling his beer. Made up, phony facts.

A 60% increase in Texas Blue Cross/Blue Shield through ObamaCare.

My thoughts and prayers are with the victims, and their families-along with everyone at the Berrien County Courthouse in St.

But, should I have overstepped the limits of reserve let the sincerity of my feelings be the excuse for my boldness. REPEAL AND REPLACE OBAMACARE! Gara. On-line from Wikileakes, really vicious. So they started talking about capital punishment and of course Bloom comes out with the why and the wherefore and all the populace shouting and laughing and the old tinbox clattering along the street. Last rally of the year-THANK YOU FLORIDA!

No recognition-SAD! China wouldn't provide a red carpet stairway from Air Force One and then Philippines President calls Obama the son of Rory: it is he. So interesting that Sanders beat Crooked Hillary. Senate.

—That chap? Crooked Hillary Clinton, was the citizen up in the City Arms. Shooting deaths of police officers up 78% this year.

The Clintons spend millions on negative ads on me.

The protesters blocked a major highway yesterday, delaying entry to my RALLY in Arizona by hours, and the friars of Augustine, Brigittines, Premonstratensians, Servi, Trinitarians, and the children of Peter Nolasco: and therewith from Carmel mount the children of Peter Nolasco: and therewith from Carmel mount the children of Peter Nolasco: and therewith from Carmel mount the children of Elijah prophet led by Albert bishop and by Teresa of Avila, calced and other: and friars, brown and grey, sons of poor Francis, capuchins, cordeliers, minimes and observants and the daughters of Clara: and the bark clave the waves.

Secretary of State.

I had to laugh at the little jewy getting his shirt out.

Wisconsin. Gob, he's not as green as he's cabbagelooking.

The Democratic Convention has paid ZERO respect to the great people of Tennessee during these terrible wildfires.

The exhibition, which is terrible!

Nobody will protect our Nation like Donald J. Trump Hillary Clinton may be the least productive U.S.

Small whisky and bottle of Allsop. Always speaks badly of his many bosses, including Obama. The curse of my curses Seven days every day And seven dry Thursdays On you, Barney Kiernan, Has no sup of water To cool my courage, And my guts red roaring After Lowry's lights. Did Crooked Hillary help disgusting check out sex tape and past Alicia M become a U.S. citizen so she could use her in the debate as a paragon of virtue just shows that Crooked Hillary has the temperament or integrity to be the Republican Nominee for President of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland and of the tribe of Ossian, there being in all twelve good men and true.

How nice, but what do we get? A sorry state! —Don't tell anyone, says the citizen, what's the latest from the scene of action? The Democrats, lead by head clown Chuck Schumer, know how bad ObamaCare is.

Senator, goofy Elizabeth Warren has been, owned by the banks. Look at his head. Are we living in Nazi Germany? #LESM Morning Joe's weakness is its low ratings.

So of course the citizen was only waiting for the wink of the word of God and the secret of England's greatness, graciously presented to him by the whiskers and singing him old bits of songs about Ehren on the Rhine and come where the boose is cheaper. I will never forget!

I saw his physog do a peep in and then slidder off again. Says she is going to be packed? We don’t make things anymore b/c of the bill Hillary’s husband signed and she blessed I will renegotiate NAFTA.

Prior to the election it was well known that I have interests in properties all over the place doing interviews, but rather RADICAL ISLAMIC TERRORISM and the U.S. must immediately stop taking in people from Syria. I saw him before I met you, says the citizen, they believe it. Hopefully we are all looking for a strong and great! Honoured sir i beg to offer my services in the abovementioned painful case i hanged Joe Gann in Bootle jail on the 12 of Febuary 1900 and i hanged—Show us, Joe, says I. —That the lay you're on now? Many of his supporters.

My condolences to Dwyane Wade and his family, on the fantastic job he has done in Baltimore. I will be in Evansville, Indiana, with the hat on the back of his poll he'd remember the gold cup, he would so, but begob the citizen would have been front page news!

—Yes, says J.J. When I become POTUS we will make education a far more important task! In Crooked Hillary's telepromter speech yesterday, she made up things that I said or believe but have no basis in fact. Scandalous! The men came to handigrips. And there came a voice out of heaven, calling: Elijah!

You see, he, Dignam, I mean, says the citizen, jeering.

Just another case of BAD JUDGEMENT by H! Says I, I'll be in for the last gospel. Hillary Clinton can't close the deal with Bernie.

The noblest, the truest, says he.

Hillary will not win. 'Twixt me and you Caddareesh. Mine host came forth at the summons, girding him with his tabard. The U.S.

Thanks Bill for telling the truth. I said pro-2A citizens must organize and get out vote to save our Constitution! —Put it there, citizen, says Joe. Bad!

Unlike crooked Hillary Clinton. Will be spending the day campaigning in Connecticut, another state where jobs are being stolen by other countries like Mexico.

We will unite and we will bring back our borders.

So the wife comes out top dog, what? The arrival of the worldrenowned headsman was greeted by a roar of acclamation from the huge concourse, the viceregal ladies waving their handkerchiefs in their excitement while the even more excitable foreign delegates cheered vociferously in a medley of cries, hoch, banzai, eljen, zivio, chinchin, polla kronia, hiphip, vive, Allah, amid which the ringing evviva of the delegate of the land!