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#and i ended up napping early bc i was rllytired frommy walk
weenhands
·
1 year
Text
the only time today i manage to let out a genuine smile is while watching return frank doing a silly little dance while onstage during vampire money <333 dilfs are the only things protecting this country
#THAT ALMOSY TYPED OUT CUNTY
#also yeah todsy was absolutely horrid ans terrible wnd i dony deserve to be alive idk
#i was very upset. And it showed near loved ones ans i wish i wasnt alive i dont deserve literally anything im so terrible<333
#and i ended up napping early bc i was rllytired frommy walk
#and on that walk i just really thought about how my ....Undiagnosed Ocd is literally ruining my life
#bc atfirst i considered it anxiety and rumination and etc etc but now that im doingba bit of research it is almost perfectly
#in the box of obsessive compulsive disorder
#this has basically ruined my life since i was roughly 16 and ages 16 - 20 are a massive blur <33 no real goddamn memories
#my life is terrible i just want to go back to when i was in middle school when i was just depressed but also happy at times
#if i struggle make it so that i can at least feel like im here lol
#but yea i got some clarity abt it all and i think its making sense
#i just want to live again
#i dont feel real and i wanna go offline too bc its showing on here too
#me being like more grumpy and posting way less about frank
#i feel like i lost my passion for mcr/frank a bit and rn its just me being depressedand letting my thoughts control me like they have
#since i was in the 11th grade
#whatever. i just hope tomorrow reflects the clarity i have and i dont end up so insanely sad
#hhhhh<333 i hate mysekf so much i. an undeserving of so much especially my parents
#i dont deserve a roof over my headim just some disabled idiot who is stuck in constant rumination <3333 idiot idiot die
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