Tumgik
#and i just. sat there sweating. i pray he is Just into minecraft and that was not my death omen
apollos-boyfriend · 1 year
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i love the qsmp but also it’s become my biggest fear because before, despite Also being into minecraft/mcyt, i knew my younger cousins wouldn’t know the same servers/creators i did due to them only watching brazilian creators, and therefore i did not have to worry about the possibility of Brainrotting over something they were just normal about. now, with a lot of them being teenagers, they are in Prime age range for the qsmp, and the possibility of them also watching it is Not zero
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strawberrylemonz · 4 years
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Fateful Night
Grian never forgot his original home, his original family. He didn’t remember the adoption of him and his brothers, but he remembered time after that. His father, King Philza Minecraft, was kind and firm to his sons and his kingdom. He remembered Wilbur’s love of all things musical, how he preferred words over a blade. He recalled his days training alongside Techno in the courtyard, both laughing as they beat their opponents together. He remembered his bedroom in the right wing of the castle, in between Technoblade and Wilbur’s. He remembered his crown and his cape, how he would proudly wear them during celebrations and balls.
But those days were over, he had to remind himself to move on. SMP Earth’s portal had been out of commission for years now, and no one knew why. Signs that the server still existed were found, but no one could piece together the pieces to find the issue with the server. No one could make contact with anyone stuck inside the server, and no one inside could get out. Grian couldn’t get back to his former home, he couldn’t get back to his family. In a way, that makes things easier to live somewhere else. He had disappeared from SMP Earth as a young child, much too young. Now, as a grown man, no one knew of his royal status. He didn’t push to hide his status from his new friends and family, but his situation wasn’t exactly anything that anyone could easily bring up into a conversation. Instead of trying to find a way to tell people, he just found it easier to not acknowledge at all.
He still can’t help but wonder, to question. He still didn’t understand how he was taken away from his room, his palace. He did question some of the competitors in MCC, how they seemed so familiar yet so different. He did wonder whatever became of his baby brother. He remembers many names for the child, but his brain couldn’t pinpoint what name was chosen in the end. It had been so long ago when the child was adopted that his brain couldn’t mush together his name. But he still remembered his eyes, how they shone with curiosity. He still recalls the night that he and his brother’s met the young babe for the very first time.
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The winter was colder than usual that year, too cold. Techno and Grian were walking beside Wilbur, taking sips of hot cocoa as Wilbur rambled about his newfound hatred of anteaters. Classes had ended hours before, and they were trying to their best to pass the time until dinner was prepared. They would have usually spent this time with their father, all talking about their day as they sat in the king’s study. Unfortunately, for the princes, this tradition was broken that night. Their father had left after lunch to conduct his weekly visit to the cities and towns that fell under the kingdom’s protection. Unlike the previous visits, however, he had not returned yet. Visits usually lasted a few hours, but tonight was different. It had been six hours since lunch, and he was still gone. As much as they wanted to panic, the triplets knew that things would be okay. This was their father, after all, nothing could scare or harm him.
Grian waved at the night guards as he and his brothers entered the courtyard. They made it halfway when they heard the familiar sound of wings flapping. Turning around, they greeted their father as he landed in front of them. They were stunned, however, why their father hastily nodded to them, before rushing away without a single word. The boys watched in confusion as he curled his wings over himself, as if to shield something in his arms. Although his face appeared to stay neutral and calm, the triplets knew better. Their father was afraid, they could tell by the way he held himself. After exchanging glances with each other, they rushed to follow him, their hot cocoa long forgotten. They followed in worry, listening as Phil barked orders in an unfamiliar, stern voice. They watched as servants ran off, gathering all the nurses and doctors they could find. Phil kicked his bedroom door open, causing the triplets to jump back in surprise. When they regained their composure, they rushed forward to see what their father was shielding. Or, in this case, who he was shielding. The three princes froze in their spots as their father unraveled his wings, revealing an infant babe, bundled in a tattered and burnt blanket. They made their way to step inside the room, but were quickly ushered aside by nurses, who closed the door before them.
“Was that a baby?”
“New sibling, pog.”
“What do you think their name is?”
“I bet it’s a boy!”
“Nuh uh, it’s a girl!”
“Guys, they’re a baby, not an it.”
“I bet I’ll be the favorite brother.”
“No way!”
The triplets sprung into action, ready to greet their new sibling. Rushing back to their rooms, they all quickly worked to make themselves presentable for the welcoming. Dawning their softest sweaters, they each exited their rooms to return to their father. Wilbur adjusted his beanie, Techno his crown, as Grian adjusted the grip on his stuffed cow. All sharing a satisfied smile, they made their way to their father’s room. As they walked down the hall, they took note of the sorrowful expressions of the nurses and doctors who were walking in the opposite direction. When they finally reached the door to the room, they were greeted by a familiar witch doctor. The man smiled down at the young princes, tipping his hat to them as he walked away. When they entered the bedroom, they saw their father sitting on the bed, his back turned to them. As they moved towards him, they were greeted by him, his voice soft.
“Boys, you should be at the dinner table by now.”
“Is that our new sibling?”
Wilbur played with his fingers as he watched his father’s movements, Techno and Grian following their brother’s actions. Phil finally turned to face the three boys, who all faltered at his tired eyes. Giving his sons a tired smile, Phil beckoned the three boys over to him. Slowly approaching the bed, they saw the infant lay on the comforter, his small hands balled into a fist and clinging to his blanket. They watched as he took ragged breaths, his chest rising and falling in uneven patterns. Techno was the first to speak up.
“Is it okay?”
“Techno, don’t be rude!”
“Heh?”
Phil lightly chuckled as he returned his gaze from his sons to the small infant, who was sprawled upon the bed, his breathing becoming shakier as the seconds passed. The triplets frowned as the sadness returned to Phil’s eyes, his voice getting quiet.
“I found a village outside of our kingdom’s borders. It had been burned and destroyed by pillagers. I searched the village many times, but he was the sole survivor. I found him, bundled up, laying in the snow. He wasn’t moving or responding, but he was breathing. That was enough to get me to rush him back here.”
Grian tore his eyes away from his father, deciding to look at the sleeping child. The boy was cute, Grian will admit, but he did look sickly. Wiping some of the sweat off the infant’s forehead, he asked the question that plagued his mind.
“Will he be okay?”
His father and brothers turned to face him, watching as he combed the baby’s hair to the side. Techno and Wilbur quieted down as they faced their father. Phil sighed as he watched the tenderness in Grian’s actions. Closing his eyes, Phil spoke up.
“The regular doctors said there wasn’t anything they could do for him. The nurses said that only a miracle could pick him up from death’s door.”
The triplets felt colder than they have ever felt. They had just got their new baby brother, and now they were losing him. They had to say goodbye before they could say hello. It just wasn’t fair-
“However,”
Three small heads quickly returned their gazes to that of their father’s.
“The last doctor, an old friend of mine, managed to contact the stars. A goddess, Clara, had apparently responded without hesitation. She happily agreed to revive the child and give him her protection.”
The three couldn’t bring themselves to make a witty remark to their father. Magic was real, this was true. Totems of undying were real, this they knew. But as much as they loved listening and reading the stories, the three could not bring themselves to believe that the gods would care for an unknown babe. Complete nonsense, if you asked them. For all they knew, their father was just trying to keep their spirits up, so he most likely crafted a story so that the boys wouldn’t panic when the magic occurred. As they all turned their attention to the sickly baby, they noticed that he stopped breathing. There was silence as the four waited, watching. Wilbur couldn’t stop the watering of his eyes as he latched onto Techno, who was stiff as a board. Phil just closed his eyes, appearing to be praying to whatever entity was listening in, watching the panicked family. Grian, blinded by his own tears, watched over the infant. He let out a shuddering gasp as he held onto the child’s stiff hand with his own. Suddenly, the feeling of warm hands passing through him caused his eyes to widen in shock, the stuffed cow in his arms being pulled closer to his chest. The warmth left as quickly as it came, but that wasn’t what kept him silent. There, laying on the bed, was the baby, breathing normally. Leaning over to get a better look at him, he noticed the warmer tone in the baby’s skin. He took note of the small freckles that began to fade into view, seemingly to mimic small stars. Clutching the cow, Grian prepared to call his family over, only to be stopped by the child furrowing his eyebrows. With a quiet yawn, the baby slowly blinked his eyes open. Grian felt his throat tightened as beautiful, big blue eyes stared into his. Grian couldn’t help but notice how the child’s eyes were as of the sea and the stars conjoined into one. Suddenly, the child switched his gaze down to the stuffed cow in Grian’s arms. Eyes widening with excitement, the baby wiggled his arms free and reached for the toy, squealing in delight.
It was then that Grian knew that he fell in love.
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Grian always thought of his family, every day. He had found a new family with Hermitcraft, with its people and with his makeshift children. He was grateful for the family he had now, but he couldn’t help but miss the one he once had.
“Grian! Are you almost ready?”
Shaking his head, Grian called back to Mumbo, who was outside of the room. Reassuring Mumbo that he would meet him at the gates, he smiled as he finished getting ready. As he adjusted his shirt, Grian couldn’t help but feel giddy for tonight. How could he not? It was a special night on the server, after all. One of their youngest members, Tommy, had something grand planned for everyone to see. Tommy was a unique and unusual case for all the hermits. He had appeared two years prior, broken and dull. With nothing but a few personal items, he was nothing but a broken shell of what he used to be. The hermits worked hard to get him to where he was today, to help him heal. They still didn’t know his past pain, but they didn’t push him to reveal anything he didn’t want to. It took a while, but the boy eventually trusted them enough to settle down and make a home there with them. Now, they were ready to see his biggest project on the server. Months prior, Tommy had requested a big area to build an amusement park. He explained that it would be a fun and safe place, and that it was the gate for him to open up about his past to them. He brightened up as the hermits all voiced their encouragement and approval. He insisted on completing the project all by himself, and he did. As soon as it was complete, he sent out invitations to all the hermits for a private opening night. The invitations were dated for tonight. Humming to himself, he peeked into a spare room, satisfied to see Jrumbot and Grumbot asleep for the night. Grabbing his coat, Grian gave his reflection a nod as he left the house, on his way to meet the rest of the server.
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Tommy was almost jumping with joy as his friends arrived at the gates, each dressed in casual formal attire. His eyes scanned the crowd, pride blooming in his chest as he took note of everyone who arrived. When he saw Grian, he couldn’t help but cheer alongside his chat. Once he saw that everyone had arrived, he cleared his throat and spoke up.
“Fellas! Can I get a humina?”
Laughter bubbled in his throat as the hermits chanted without hesitation. Joy filled him as he cheered alongside them.
“That’s what I’m talking about!”
Taking a deep breath, Tommy nodded to himself with a smile as joy filled his tone. Quickly thinking over the few points in his speech that he wanted to voice, he happily spoke up.
“Thank you for coming, I mean it. Believe it or not, it took me forever to convince myself to send the invites. I’m glad I did, and I’m glad you all came. It means so much to me that you guys care so much. I hope to repay the kindness to the fullest. For now, however, I’ll give you guys a park and a backstory. Y’know, because I’m cool and shit. I’m like Spider-Man, tragic backstory and all that shit. Mentor tally is through the roof, heh.”
The hermits laughed and cheered at the young man, who glowed with pride before them. They had watched him pick himself up from the brink of death, watched as his dull eyes brightened with love and joy. Ender, they all loved this young hermit.
“Okay, enough stalling. I, TommyInnit, proudly present-”
Affectionate snickers filled the air as Tommy mimicked a drumroll.
“Innit an Adventure!!!”
Cheers erupted from everyone as the sign was revealed, and the gates unlocked. With a giddy bow, Tommy let them enter the newest star attraction of the server. Stress and Impulse doubled up, snatching Doc while they were at it. Grian smiled at Mumbo, who joined his side in the front of the crowd. The two nodded a greeting to Xisuma, who nodded back as Tommy began to show them the map, explaining the different areas of the park, as well as how he would conduct the tour, leaving his tragic hero backstory for the end, when they reached the campfire. After the basic points of the tour for opening night were completed, they all went on their merry way.
Their first stop was the center entrance of the park, dubbed “Tavern Town”. Living up to its name, there were two large taverns, both surrounded by shops and booth games of all kinds. As Tommy explained the way the lodging system would work in the different areas of the park, everyone took note of how much Tommy’s building skills had improved since his initial arrival, something they all felt pride in. He had truly grown so much since he first stumbled in, scared and confused. Once the excited teen finished going over the points for the area, everyone was free to explore the area. Grian opted to ruffle the teen’s hair, praising him for his work so far.
“What the fuck, Big G? Watch the hair, bastard. You know my badass locks take time, bruv.”
“Oh, shut your mouth, princess. I’ll mess with your hair if I feel like it.”
Grian could feel a few affectionate glares directed at the two, but he and Tommy could only smile at each other. Just as he was going to continue showering the younger boy with affection, Mumbo called him over. Tommy smiled as he followed in suit, not quite ready to leave the older man just yet. Soon enough they approached Mumbo, who happily dragged them to a door in the mountain that everyone seemed to be entering, interested. Grian glanced at the lit up sign that addressed the building.
The Cavern of Memories
Determined to face his past, Tommy put up a determined face and followed everyone in.
It was beautiful. There were rows upon rows with sections that represented different servers. Each small section represented a person. Everyone explored the various bonds their favorite bandit obtained during his life so far. The saw the elegant and aesthetically pleasing section of Eret, a strawberry dress neatly sewn by hand with a bi flag hanging above it. Flowers surrounded the stand, and the lighting made it beautiful. A crown and a pair of sunglasses sat elegantly by the stand. They murmured in awe at the different people from different worlds. Niki, Puffy, Schlatt, Dream, Karl, Quackity, Sapnap, BBH, Skeppy. They snickered as they stared with adoration at the sections for a Lani and Drista, which were made to be elegant, dainty, and full of chaos. They never prepared to see so much bedrock and forks in one section, with bee plushies and butter knives in the other. They studied the section created for Tubbo, who, according to the sign, was still Tommy’s best friend.
The group grew excited as they entered the rows for the hermits, dispersing and happily gawking over their personal sections. They couldn’t help but let the happiness swell within them as they saw the sections made especially for them. They appreciated everything in the sections, each item carefully crafted and picked for them.
Mumbo laughed as he pulled Grian over to the sections for Grumbot and Jrumbot. As Mumbo voiced his interest with the detail, Grian’s eyes wandered to an unexplored set of rows. Well, the entrance to it, at least. Furrowing his eyebrows, he headed over to it, curious. Tommy took notice and decided to follow, wanting Grian’s feedback the most. Little by little, everyone began to follow Grian and Tommy into the last section. As Grian stood at the entrance, he peered over to read the sign that stated the server these rows represented. He felt a sharp intake on his part as he read it over and over again, trying to make sure he was reading correctly.
‘SMP EARTH’
Letting out a breath, he entered, Tommy and Mumbo by his side. As he studied the sections and it’s layout, he knew where he was. This first part was obviously Business Bay. Perhaps Tommy was from there? Perhaps Tommy came from the same server he did.
Maybe Tommy knew a way back home.
“The Antarctic Empire? You really are social, Tommy.”
Grian’s eyes widened as he quickly looked over to Doc, who was reading the sign of the next part of the sections. Desperate to see what Tommy knew, he hurried over in unusual silence. The rest of the group quietly followed, worried for Grian’s sudden shift.
He froze.
He couldn’t believe his eyes.
How did Tommy even get all this?
Ignoring the worried voices behind him, Grian made his way to the largest section, and the last one. There, sitting elegantly upon the wall, was a family portrait. Phil lovingly smiled as his wings spread proudly behind him, his arms open and slightly extended. To Phil’s right was Grian’s eldest brother, Technoblade. He sat with a sharp yet, somehow, kind gaze. To Phil’s left was the second eldest, Wilbur. He smiled brightly, his eyes barely visible behind the grin. And there, in the center of the two, sat Grian. He smiled slightly, eyes filled with joy and love. In his arms, was his brand new baby brother, who stared curiously at who had to be the painter.
The royal Antarctic Empire outfits were on display, the crown of each respective member set on display beside each outfit. Many items were hung with sorrowful pride. Elytra there, a guitar in the corner, piano against the wall. Weapons of all kinds hung in an organized manner. Emeralds decorated the empty space. Grian felt his chest hurt as he choked on his words. He wasn’t even aware he was being addressed until two hands firmly grabbed his arms, and a face appeared.
“-kay, big man? What wrong?”
Tommy’s worried gaze trapped Grian in uncertainty. Finally able to form words, Grian’s broken voice filled the silence.
“How…How did you know them?”
Tommy blinked a few times, before turning around to face the display. They didn’t need to see his face to see the sorrow in the teen. Sighing, Tommy pointed at the baby in the portrait.
“See that lil’ man right there? That’s me, as a baby. Apparently I was found by the King, Philza Minecraft. He’s my adoptive dad. Then there’s my oldest brother, Technoblade-”
God, everyone could see how he tensed upon saying the name of his brother.
“-Then there's Wilbur. He practically raised me-”
Once again, his body language told the story. The way he slouched in defeat gave off warning alarms.
“-Then there’s my last older brother. I actually can’t remember his name, he went missing while I was still so small. I do remember some things from him, he gave me a cow on my first day. He’s also great at playing games, very pog. He’s actually the first face I saw when I arrived. You see, I was found in the snow of the ruins of what was once my village. I was dying, but then a witch doctor came and spoke to a goddess in the sky who agreed to revive me and shelter me. I still talk to her, whenever I get the chance. She’s guided me through a lot, she’s great. Her name is-”
“Clara.”
Tommy froze as he turned around, facing the owner of the voice. Grian just stared at him, desperation and hope in his eyes. Tommy stared in confusion as Grian approached him. Furrowing his eyebrows, Grian peered into the teen’s eyes. They stayed blue for a moment, but only a moment. Suddenly, Tommy seemed to have burst to life. Constellations painted his face, wonderful and beautiful as they are. They were Tommy’s one-of-a-kind and unique freckles, crafted specifically for him. And in his eyes? The stars and the sea danced together once more. Suddenly, Grian was wearing his best sweater in his father’s room once again, a cow hugged to his chest.
And then, he broke.
Tears escaped his eyes and he let out a strangled sob, throwing his arms around the younger boy, pulling him into a hug. Tommy let out a startled yelp as his friend engulfed him into a tight and gently embrace, sobbing into Tommy’s shoulder. Tommy had no idea what was happening. Why would Grian be so entranced by SMP Earth? Why would he care about Tommy’s relations to his family? Why did he know about Clara-
Wait-
Oh.
Oh.
Hol y sH I T
Pulling away, not quite believing what his mind put together, Tommy peered at the mess that was Grian. He looked, truly looked at his features. He still wasn’t sure, he didn��t want to hope. He didn’t want to hurt again. But as soon as Tommy peered into Grian’s eyes, he knew. There was no denying it. He knew those eyes. He’d never forget those eyes. They were the same, loving eyes that welcomed him into his new life.
“What the fuck, man.”
Mans before anyone could half-heartedly tell him off for his language, Tommy broke as well. The floodgates were let loose, and Tommy was the gatekeeper who allowed them to be free. Big blobs of tears fell off the boy’s face as he shoved his face into Grian’s chest. Grian, in turn, held onto Tommy as if he would disappear. The two crumbled to the floor, Grian rocking his baby brother in his arms once more, whispering soothing words to him. The rest of the group watched, and their very own hearts seemed to have burst alongside their two friends once they heard the next words.
“I’ve missed you, big bro.”
“I’ve got you, shooting star. I’m not letting you go, not again.”
All the hermits knew right then and there that the rest of the night would be filled with nothing but happiness and love.
They knew that the two finally found their home.
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This series has been inspired by @petrichormeraki (my beloved, dearest enemy of a blog)
@petrichormeraki has also made art based on this chapter! So has @sydneys-sketches !
New Brother Pog - @petrichormeraki
The Royal Family of the Antarctic Empire - @petrichormeraki
Grian finds the portrait - @sydneys-sketches
Part 1 [CURRENT]
Part 2
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parisianartistic · 5 years
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title: river in the desert 
about: Sèbastien has been going nuts worrying over July leaking or investigating the letters. So he goes to get back his property
when: March 20, 2020
tagging: @hbickurt & @sq-muckraker
warnings: Age gap relationship, sugar daddy mention
Sébastien had to get it back. There couldn’t be any evidence of his relationship with Dean. He owed Dean the courtesy of keeping this to himself. For the last week, Sébastien found himself going insane. Endlessly, he would imagine scenarios and things that would happen if their relationship were to be uncovered. Eventually, Sébastien was driven to the internet to ask questions. 
Can a sugar baby be held to legal charges? Sugar daddies whose reputations were ruined by sugaring. Is sugaring illegal? Currently holding a student visa, what happens if I get arrested? 
None of it helped his anxiety. So he moved on to other things. Played Minecraft, programmed, even sat on the floor and pulled out his fancy painting supplies. But nothing made the dread go away. Sébastien really fucked up on this one. As he was rounding the corner after class, he paused at the Faculty offices. His eyes glanced over the signs. By the luck of god, Ms. July’s name stood out like a sore thumb. Ms. July, room 115. The thoughts evolved rapidly in his mind. Before he could even come up with a plan, his feet were moving along the corridor of the Faculty offices. His throat tightened as the numbers ascended. 107, 109, 111…. His eyes moved forward,  past the in-between rooms and calculated the room that was her office. It was just around the corner. His body picked up the pace. 
       THUMP. 
One second, he was about to turn the corner for the other offices, the next he was on the ground. His adrenaline pulled him up quickly. There the blonde was, right in front of him and on the floor with papers surrounding her. With the reflexes of a cat, Sébastien leapt up and jumped over her. As he fled the crime scene, he caught a quick glance to the side. There it was, Ms. July’s room. One of the largest offices he’s seen. He looked over his shoulder to see July had barely recovered to a sit-up position as he disappeared down the hallway.  
--------------- the next day ------------------------------------ 
Today was the day he needed to do it. Anxiety overtook him. Adrenaline drove him onwards. 
Just like the paintball game, Sébastien snuck through the hallways. Hoodie pulled over his head and limited eye contact. He knew what he was about to do was wrong. If he was caught, he would be in more trouble than any regular student. But what if somebody looked further into the letter. What if somebody caught him and Dean? 
This time, Sébastien peeked around the corner. His bright green eyes scanned the hallwa - and that’s when he saw her. Her signature blonde hair bobbing on the way to the common area. Sébastien felt his heart lurch forward. His long legs thrust forward and Sébastien made a direct path to her office. On his way there, he turned his head to look at the common area. His eyes caught sight of her going to the coffee machine. While he was looking, his eye also caught onto one Kurt Hummel. Rather than stopping, he held up a hand in a small wave and kept going. He got to the office and tried the handle. To his surprise, the door opened without any resistance.
Why? He wasn’t going to ask. He pushed it open and shut the door behind him. He heard the click in the door. That was the reason. The damn thing was broken. He breathed out and stepped forward.
When the automatic lights turned on, Sébastien nearly fainted. As he stood in the room, a chill ran down his spine. It was so wrong. He wasn’t supposed to be here. Even though he’d seen everything before, the objects felt alien to him. Anything he touched could possibly explode. He stepped forwards, his legs wobbling like the floor would give out beneath him at any second. Sébastien was used to painting for hours, and hours on end without a sigh of exhaustion. But now sweat rolled down his palms, as he advanced into the large office. 
First things first, the computer. Sébastien dug into his pocket for the flash drive, and approached the computer. Just like Bree taught him, he plugged it in. He knew it would take a couple of minutes, so that’s when he started to look through the drawers. He fished through the desk first. Tossing about everything in there to give any hint at where they could be.
He noted a small little key, and looked over at the files. Sébastien snatched it up quickly and went to the files. He quickly unlocked it and threw it open.
By some act of god or just sheer dumb luck, the minute he opened the cabinet he saw the label. 
        ‘Whiny brat kids.’ 
Sébastien opened up the folder, and right there on top was a photocopied version of his letter. Air whooshed out of his mouth with his sigh of relief. He couldn’t believe that he found them. Shutting the file cabinet, he went to the desk to replace the key.
By the time he looked up at the computer, it had unlocked.
“Oh Bree, you’re an absolutely genius.” He went to the command line and typed a full search for his letter. 
Then the door handle jiggled.
Sébastien's hands flopped on the keyboard as he looked up at the door. Gasping, Sébastien glanced at the desktop. All he saw on the screen was ‘moving files to recycle bin.’ 
His mouth hung open. He could barely register it’s words before he locked the computer. There was a loud curse from the woman, as the key was shoved violently into the door.
Sébastien clutched the folder against his chest and dove for the floor. His knees hit the floor head, but he ignored it. He scrambled desperately under the table and turned his back to the metal. Using his leg, he pulled the chair in. Once he heard the door swoosh open, Sébastien pulled his knees in. He grabbed his ankles and sucked in some air. His body and the air around him went still.
       ‘I’m so dead… I’m so dead… I am so dead.
Her stomps echoed against the floor as she approached her desk. His heart beat so violently in his chest that he could swear that the metal was thumping too. Her legs came into view. He knew that it was over. 
Then the phone rang. 
She remained standing as she answered the phone.
“Hello?” Her annoyance was obvious. There was some inaudible speech coming from the ear piece. “What? No, I don’t have an itch down there. Who is this? Who gave you this number?” Short and snappy. She had been receiving these calls all day. 
Sébastien acted quickly to this. He saw Kurt earlier. He was praying for him to answer immediately. Kurt’s message came like a ping from god.
He looked up when Ms. July slammed the receiver harshly. Sébastien felt his body leap at the noise. He cupped his hand over his mouth suddenly, hoping he didn’t utter a sound. He watched the chair in front of him pull out slowly. His body visibly shook as the legs swung in front of the edge of the chair. A tear glistened at the corner of his eye. Sébastien closed his eyes, and waited for hell to ensue.
       ‘I’m so fucking dead. 
Then the voice of an angel came trilling into the room. He didn’t know what happened, but it only took a couple of minutes for Kurt to get her out of the room. Once she left, Sébastien slowly crawled out from under the desk. His head turned everyway, looking for a sigh of her. He peaked over the desk and saw the closed door. His head turned to the computer. He pressed enter and looked at the results. Sébastien had accidentally wiped mostly everything from her drive. But he didn’t have time to think about it. He went to the recycle bin on the computer and emptied it.
He didn’t care. This is what she got for leaking the letters. He pulled the flash drive out and ran out of the office with the folder of the letters in hand. His long legs carried him quickly out of the building. He weaved in and out of the crowd and got to his bike. He opened the folder to see that they were all there. He stuffed it into the bag behind his bike, unchained his bike, hopped on, and pushed off. It was the fastest he’d ever gotten home.
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sincerelylaureen · 5 years
Text
Dates
Date 1 ❤️ 09/06/19 ~ 1-6pm :)
I ate poke along the highway (@Sunshine Poke), we walked along the beach, drove in his excursion along the coast and listened/sang to music together :) oh! And he skipped rocks! He tried to teach me but I sucked. Honestly thought he was just the most simple person and super kind and funny, go with the flow type.
Date #2 ❤️ 09/14/19 ~ 5-9pm :)
I met up with Dylan and Camden at Luiseño Park! We hung out there and then went to get Chick fil a. We ate in his car in the parking lot and goodness he was so handsome 😅 loved our conversations. He showed me Camp Pendleton and his barracks and we talked with Camden there. So funny!!!! Loved it.
Date #3 ❤️ 09/21/19 ~ 4/5:00-9:30pm :)
Uhm so we went to the store on base to buy ben and jerrys ice cream and snacks but uh... that nap date we were supposed to have wasn’t a nap date... yeah... LOL. 10/10 🥰😍 goodness. He’s SUCH a gentleman. Made the experience amazing.
Date #4 ❤️ 09/29/19 ~ 1:30-7:00pm :)
What a day!!! So we met up at the mall, we ate at sushi boat. Then I drove us to harveston to take a walk around the lake. Then we went to Backyard Bottleshop & Taproom for some beer tasting because he wanted to get me out of my comfort zone. Then we went to the trampoline park! And sat by the park by Purroy and Butterfield for a little bit before heading to the La Alba trail... and uh... under the freaking sky... holy shit. 10 out of 10!!! That was incredible. Never thought I would do that. It was his first time like that too so 😍 then we got some canes and I drove him back to his excursion by the mall where we ate outside in the back of it. Lovely day!
Accompanying him!!! ❤️ 10/07/19 ~ 12pm-3:30pm
We went to BMW to trade in his excursion! He looked so so happy with his new car. I’m glad I helped in the way I did. He deserves the best.
Date #5 ❤️ 10/19/19 ~ 11:00am-4:00pm :)
We met up by Oceanside pier, went on a walk there, then had brunch at Breakfast Club Diner! He loves his maple syrup on his pancakes 😂 I had french toast and he had this omelette! We headed back to the barracks and cuddled and uh... yeah again. LOL. Geez hes the best 😩 so sweet and intimate and you can really feel the connection. He’s an amazing cuddler. I wouldn’t mind waking up to that view I was looking at earlier while he was sleeping every morning... :’)
Date #6 ❤️ 10/23/19 ~ 5:30pm-9pm
We met by the pier again!! We walked and saw the sunset and he put his arm around me and I did the same back. So sweet. Then we headed to this one place to eat fish but then we decided we wanted mexican food. So we just kept walking and planned to eat at Dorothy’s tacos but it was closed! So we ended up in Sanchos tacos which was delicious!! Then we walked and I gave him my gift. I was so glad I got to give it to him. We had some great convos in the parking lot in the back of my car. He’s freaking strong as hell. I admire him. Hugs and kisses came at random times :) oh! And I got to walk and hold his arm and hand today!!! I loved every second!!!
Date #7 ❤️ 11/02/19 ~ 11:10am-8:11pm
So Dylan and I met up at the park in the morning and drove into the barracks. I gave him his essential oils too! We played call of duty and Minecraft for a little bit on multiplayer. LOL. I sucked so bad. Then we went out for lunch at this place called Miss Kim’s by That Boy Good and had barbecue that was suuuuper delish! We were so full by the time we finished. Then Dylan’s friend, Mason, hit him up and we met up with him at a brewery within walking distance called Breakwater! I had a Bitburger Beer and Dylan (coors with lime?) didn’t like it at all LOL. We stayed there for an hour and a half or so and then headed back to the barracks and he LET ME DRIVE. Like what. That trust though. 😂 no ones ever let me drive their car. Then we got back to the barracks and watched movies 😉 yup... again it was 10/10 amazing 🤤 He’s gentle but aggressive at the same time 🥰 note: dirty talk going down!!! Must do. Haha. Then we went out for some ice cream at this gelato place called Gelato Love in Carlsbad :) went back to the barracks, took a nap and cuddled 🥰 and I went home... Dylan’s remarkable... 😭 I wanna keep him. I wonder if he feels the same way 😩
Date #8 ❤️ 11/11/19 ~ 11:45am-3:30pm
Took my NCLEX and then met up with Dylan. We cleaned his car since he got a free carwash for being in the military! sadly couldn’t do much after because of the time :c but we got Panda Express and then sat in his car for a bit checking out some new music :) can’t wait to hang out with him more and help him feel better about his family... future gift possibly? A plane ticket? I’d totally do it
Date #9 ❤️ 11/14/19 ~ 5:30pm - 9:30pm
Met up with Dylan in the Khols parking lot! Then I took him to Aztek Tacos and he ordered his California burrito with no fries (lol) and I got some tacos. He let me try this mango-rita? It was good 😂 then we went to Coin Op in old town!!! That was so fun, we played a bunch of games and I even beat him in basketball and street fighter 😂 then we walked along the street and sat by the city hall on one of the benches and had a good talk outside. It was super nice. Then I drove him back to his car and he showed me memes before he left. LOL. I can feel the connection growing and I hope it only grows from here 😌
11/16-17/19 ❤️ ~ 11:30pm - 3:20am
Dylan drove over to me last night and we went to sonic, ate some Sonic blasts, shared music & showed some funny Facebook videos while in the parking lot of fitness 19, drove back home and lied down in his car with the moon roof open and continued listening to music and talked some more. Then we gave eachother some amazing kisses while listening to 80s music (who knew that would be such a vibe? 😂) to last until the next time we see eachother. I’ve never done this late night hangout thing before and it was honestly so great. He’s great. I’ve always thought so. 💓
Date #10 ❤️ 11/22/19 ~ 6:30pm - 11:15pm
So I met up with Dylan and Camden at Big Bobs Best Pizza and Dylan and I shared a large pizza while Camden had a bby cheese one. Afterwards we went to the park and the 3 of us played so much on the jungle gym!! It was so so fun. The slide was our favorite 😂 then we moved over to climbing on the rocks and then the tennis courts where we literally ran in circles chasing eachother, and then the baseball field. Dylan and I talked in between and snuck kisses and I was admiring him and Camdens bond. :’) we then went to Dylan’s old apartment and chilled there and THEY HAVE A DOGGIE and lizards omg. Camden showed me his room! Honestly I wouldnt mind seeing camden more. And then me and Dylan cuddled on the couch and then ahhh his kisses get better every time dear gosh. Best cuddles and best kisser ever. LOL. And yup we ended up going to the room and uh 😍😍 the connection seemed so much stronger! It was amaaaaazing! When we finished we walked to the living room and stood and hugged and talked before I left :’) this evening was such a dream... I hope me and Dylan keep this up for a long time, and I pray that God will find a way to make this work if it’s meant to be. ❤️
11/29/19 ❤️ 12:17pm-3:15am
Dylan drove over to me again and he and I talked and drove around in his car. We also got 4 McDonald’s sausage burritos for us as a snack 😂 we talked some more and I held his hand and shared a bunch of kisses and hugs ❤️
Date #11 ❤️ 11/29/19 ~ 2:30pm-10:45pm
Dylan met up with me and mama today for Black Friday shopping at the Carlsbad Shoppes and UTC and it was the best day 😭 i was so so happy that he came with me. We first went to Bath and Body Works, we got him lotion and a candle! Then to PINK and Aerie for some underwear, perfume, and some bras/sweats and Dylan helped me choose! 😭 then we went into Abercrombie when we got to UTC and Dylan bought his cologne 😍 OH and he also bought my LULULEMON LEGGINGS!!! LIKE WHAT!!!? Ive never had that happen to me before. Just someone who pays so much to buy me something... I owe him so much. 😭 Had dinner at Din Tai Fung and I’m so so happy he liked it!!! We then walked a bit after to digest the food haha. I couldn’t stop holding his arm and his hands and hugging him today. He’s amazing, idk how I got so lucky.
Date #12 ❤️ 11/30/19 ~ 11:15am-7:40pm
Met up with Dylan again!!! And we had a lovely time snuggling up together in his room despite his roommate being there 😍 he ate his leftovers and then we played a game together! Snuggled some more and then went to the bathroom to get warm 😉 honestly that was AHHMAZING. From the floor to the counter to the floor again 😅🤤 He massaged my body with lotion too omg. We also took a shower together 😩 2 things... choking and going down 🤭 the best lol also the way he looks once he’s out of the shower with his hair wet and all... 😍 he’s so perfect. Not just because of his body but it all just ties in together. Then we went to eat at Panda Express on base and then drove to Sears at the Shoppes! Had some Haagen Dazs and went to game stop then Barnes and Noble!!! Great way to end the night for me :) today was such a great day. I love hanging out with him and his presence!!! ❤️
Date #13 ❤️ 12/04/19 ~ 6pm-9:15pm
Met up with Dylan at target to get a couple things and then he bought eggnog and I bought sugar cookie milk! It was so good. LOL. And then we went to eat dinner at Pho Ha along Douglas :) I’m glad he liked his Thai tea with boba and his vermicelli noodles with chicken! after we went to Verizon for a bit and then just talked for the rest of the night in my car before having to pick up mama from work ☺️ I love talking and hanging out with him.
Date #14 ❤️ 12/09/19 ~ 4pm to 9:30pm
Mama and I met up with Dylan at Texas Roadhouse and we had a yummy dinner! And then after that Dylan drove us to the BMW dealership in Vista to check out some cars. Him and mama were talking and and it made me so happy! I also got to hug him and hold his hand. He gave me his jacket because I was cold too 😭 then we went go kart racing at K1 speed! It was sooo fun me and Dylan have to go back. 😂 before we left we hung out on the chairs and just talked and laughed and took a bunch of photos. ❤️
Date #15 ❤️ 12/13/19 ~ 5:30pm to 9pm
Met up with Dylan and Camden at Ralphs to get their apartment key copied! And then we had a nice dinner over at Chin’s Chinese food. Camden kept wanting to sit to me but ultimately ended up sitting next to his dad. LOL. He was a bit rowdy today tbh but it’s all good haha. Got some lo mein, sweet and sour chicken and chop suey! Then we went back to their place, relaxed for a second, and then his ex called to let him know that she’s gonna be picking up some stuff at the apartment, so we drove around and looked at some Christmas lights and Dylan got a vanilla milkshake from McDonalds! LOL. He drove me back and I left right away to avoid any confrontation eek. 
Date #16 ❤️ 12/15/19 ~ 12:45pm to 7:30pm
So I went to church at 11 at St. Margaret and then met up with Dylan and Camden at Barnes and Noble. I loveeeed this time! He got some stickers and then we showed Camden some truck and dinosaur books and he kept showing me these books that have those sound buttons and Paw Patrol. Camden is so fun to be around! He wanted so many things and Dylan was just like “just wait till Christmas” lol. After Barnes we went to eat at Golden Corral and Camden decided to sit next to me again haha. I talked to him a lot and fed him brussel sprouts. Afterwards walking back to the car, he held my hand! I cry. We made our way to the park and let Camden play for about an hour? Weather was beautiful and Dylan and I played too! Dylan was apparently the monster haha. We headed back to the apartment afterwards and we cuddled on the couch and played with Camden and then it got to that kind of moment so we head to the room and yup... dude I had my monthly visitor too, it was wild. But it was 10/10 as always ahhhhhhh. No words. It was amazing. LOL. I then had to go because his ex was coming back at 10 supposedly. :) 
Date #17 ❤️ - 12/21/19 from 12:45pm to 3:30pm
So met up with Dylan after my run in Carlsbad (5 miles actually LOL) and then afterwards I drove him and I to get some food because we haven’t eaten! We went to the same That Boy Good barbecue place along Coast Highway and got the same thing haha. I got the brisket with mac and cheese and his was brisket with fries! He was so handsome today. I couldn’t help but hold his arm while walking! Then we drove back to where he parked over in Carlsbad and then talked in the car for a bit, exchanged a few kisses, and then had to go! 
Date #18 ❤️ - 12/22/19 from 12:30pm to 10:00pm
Mama and I met up with Dylan at the mall and we kidnapped him! LOL. I drove us all the way to South Coast Plaza in Costa Mesa and there we walked around a lot! We got free hot chocolate while doing so, and then went to Ruby’s Diner for a quick lunch. He got this butterfinger milkshake and when we took a sip we could feel our arteries clog omg. Afterwards we walked some more and this entire time I was holding his arm and hand and at times he would have his arm around me too! There was a part where mama was taking our photo and he “sniffed” me LOL but in the photo it looked sweet so I’ll take it. He also gave me a bunch of forehead kisses and hugs :,) After walking around, we decided to move on to Mission Inn!! We walked around and looked at the lights. We bought this suuuper good hot chocolate with a gingerbread man on top. He gave me a kiss with whipped cream on his lips and it was literally... sweet. LOL. Dinner was at The Old Spaghetti Factory! We waited together outside and I held his hand and he gave me a bunch of kisses!! When we were inside he ordered me a Long Island drink but sadly he got heartburn from drinking it afterwards :( I felt so bad huhu. But he ended up being okay. I gotta bring TUMS in my bag now honestly lol. Then we walked back to the car and drove home. Today was amazing and Dylan is honestly the sweetest. Every stare, every wink, every hand hold, every hug, every forehead kiss, every arm hold, I feel something in my heart for him. I like him... a lot. 
Date #19 ❤️ - 12/28/19 from 12pm to 11pm
So I met up with Dylan at the park and little did I know he actually bought me flowers and chocolates!!! It was so sweet of him. He told me beforehand that he was gonna stop at the store real quick lol. After that we went to his barracks to put the flowers inside and yup we took a little detour from plans ;) which was freaking amazing!!!! as always!!! he showed me his money collection box too!! and then headed out after an hour or so. We decided to get some Raising Canes over in Vista before heading to San Diego. Afterwards, we headed towards Petco Park and parked in the structure, walked over to where the scooters were and went around!!! I don’t remember exactly where we went but we went pretty dang far, 6 miles of scootering. LOL. Thankfully found a really nice hill (I think it was called Bankers Hill) to catch the sunset and snap a few photos. He then took me to the Altitude Sky Lounge in the Marriott Hotel!!! The view was gorgeous and we bought some drinks. Electric screwdriver I believe. His was hella strong, mine was too but more fruity. Haha. We stayed up there for about an hour and talked by the fire. I was honestly just admiring him here. I experience time flying by and slowing down with him at the same time. Afterwards we headed to Old Town SD where I took him to Cafe Coyote, he got a Cali Burrito with queso on top and I had carne asada tacos. Both of us got horchatas too. We then decided to head back to Camp Pendleton because it was super cold and we couldnt walk anymore. I cuddled with him at the barracks for a while which turned into...yup. LOL. 12/10. oh gah. I asked Dylan what he liked about me while facing him under the blankets, and he told me the most heartwarming answer that actually made me cry and he held me the whole time. I really felt it. I then headed home. I’m missing a lot of little details from today such as the kisses in between, the hand holds, arm holds, little looks of being adored... but this is one of the best days I’ve had with him and I can’t wait to have more days like this... with him. Oh, it was also our 4 month anniversary of talking to eachother... <333
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skinflesh97-blog · 5 years
Text
Coping
Road trip prep. Kids, you're in charge of  the cookies.
My alarm went off at 4:00am—an abrupt wakeup after finally finishing packing just three hours earlier. I snoozed it once…..ok, twice, and then we shoved the kids (still half asleep) into what little space was left in the loaded car, and headed west. It was a lonnnnnnng drive across Nevada—driving into the wind the entire way, dust blowing onto our roadside break of turkey and cheese. 
Thanks to the Internet and a few pointers from friends, we had a couple “ideas” where we may want to set up camp for the next four nights-we are not usually great at making FIRM plans….we are more “general idea” kind of people. You could say we are almost always winging it.  We headed down a 10 mile dirt road towards what we knew would be THE. MOST. AMAZING. campsite ever—in the trees, right on the lake, perfect. We were tired, hungry, and ready to get settled. Last fall we bought a little pop-up trailer—we figured as often as we camp, it would be nice to get out of the elements occasionally. We have loved it so far—we are always able to find secluded places to park it off the beaten path and keep away from crowds; we had planned on this time being the same.
We could faintly see the clear blue water through the trees, and were relieved and happy to have finally arrived after a full day in the car. But then we pulled up and saw what seemed to be a “local’s only” party….and we were definitely not invited. A few cars and tents scattered around near the water’s edge—no room at the inn—and here’s the kicker, the only place to turn around was occupied by several cars. And we were pulling a trailer. Whoops. 
Robby handles these situations much better than I do—we slowly drove through—every head turned. He laughed and waved like we were in a parade “we’re from out of town. Obviously. We didn’t know this place was so popular”. I sat in the passenger seat sweating and sinking lower and lower in my seat, wondering how we were ever going to get out of this place with nowhere to turn around. We inched our way through the trees—Robby maneuvering our set up  (that all the sudden seemed like a TRAIN in such tight quarters) and finally managed our way out, using a 57 point turn. We peeled out and kicked up dust as we sped away—except totally opposite of that, because the trailer only allows us to go so fast—and laughed all the way back out to the main road. At least we gave the locals a good laugh, right!? We didn’t want to take our chance down anymore unknown roads, so we put our tail between our legs and headed towards a campground.
California!
We got camp set up around ten—it was 45* in Lassen, and we were still in flip flops and shorts and really too exhausted to do anything but crawl into bed and crash. So we chose sleep over dinner and called it a day. 
We took our time waking up the next morning, ate eggs and bacon until we couldn’t eat another bite, and loaded up our packs to head out.. We spent the next three days hiking, paddling, fishing, exploring volcanoes, and completely disconnecting from the outside world. No phone service, no work, no emails to respond to, no worries really—except how stinky our armpits were and how tangled our hair was getting--it was truly the best.
We always manage to find winter in summer.
As we packed up one evening after a day on the lake—fitting kayaks, fishing gear, granola bar wrappers and tired kids into the car, an older gentleman came over—he and his wife were from Los Angeles and driving through the area. He struck up a conversation about our day. “How was the lake? (perfect. empty.) How was the fishing? (more fishing, less catching.)”, and what really struck me, “and your kids LIKE this stuff? How do you make them do all this? How do they cope without their Playstation?” 
“Well…..this is kinda...what we DO. They like to play outside—we actually go camping all the time”. 
“You mean, you just go out into the woods?” 
“yep”………….. 
If we were living in a cartoon world his eyes would have popped out of his head and his jaw would have hit the ground. 
“Huh.”
end scene.
we had the lake to ourselves.
This conversation really got me thinking. As I type this, we are driving back after eight days on the road. We are exhausted—both physically and mentally, tired of camp food, and absolutely filthy—our best “shower” was soaping* up in a river, hoping the icy cold current would rinse away some of the grime. I miss my animals and my garden, yet  I’d happily continue on down the road—I am happiest when I’m out exploring somewhere new. It’s who we are, it’s what we do, and it’s PART of the reason my kids can “cope without their Playstation” (which by the way, we didn’t tell the guy we didn’t even have one.) 
But, it’s only part of the reason—I realize that our particular lifestyle is not for everyone, and that’s ok. But there ARE other ways to keep kids from being completely dependent on screens, gadgets, gizmos, and the need for constant stimulation and entertainment.  Here are a few of my ideas: (I'm not saying this is the only way to parent, it just seems to work for us:)
Don’t buy them screens/gadgets/gizmos/etc. Hey that’s easy—and cheap! My kids are not this special breed of children who have no desire to glue their faces to something plugged in. But it’s a lot harder to do when they don’t have access to it. They don’t have their own phone or ipad, and we have an old xbox with 4 games that they can earn time for on weekends after all their chores are done--it's GREAT bribery!  (ps. I think Minecraft is a GREAT game! So much creativity to unleash!) Do they ask for all the above mentioned stuff? Do they say “but alllllllllllll my friends have ______” They DO! And guess what I say? “I don't care!" And occasionally I like to throw in things like "because I'm the mom and I say so", and then I feel super legit. I realize that as my kids get older, this one is unavoidable, so we will:
Set limits. Maybe you are a cooler parent than me and your kids have a gadget or two. Great! But they don't need to have it in hand alllllllll the time. I started an Instagram account so my kiddos could post the pictures they take and share them with cousins and grandmas and grandpas (and mostly so we could print more Chatbooks!) I log them in so they can post a few photos, we look (together) at what's going on with our cousins, and then I log them out--no time wasted mindlessly scrolling, and no wondering what garbage they saw on Instagram. But they feel connected to their cousins who live far away--win win! When they want to use the computer they have to ask--I want to know what they'll be doing. 
Have other options. As much as I wish we could--we can't spend 100% of our time outside. We are a movie loving family and movie nights are our favorite, but I hate the tv always being on--it's such an easy "out". We've had a scorcher of a summer, and some afternoons we have to hide out in the house to beat the heat, but we are making sure to do lots of reading, writing, and artwork instead of letting the tv constantly entertain us. 
Don't start them so young! I will probably ruffle so many feathers by saying this, but I honestly can't believe how many babies and toddlers I see with a screen in their hand--the grocery store, church, restaurants--everywhere. I somehow raised my babies without a screen in hand (they weren't even invented yet.) And when I say that, it sounds like I raised my babies in the 1800s and just let them play with tumbleweeds, but really it was just a few years ago, I promise. Was it hard to go to Target with a 4 year old and 2 year old? OH MY GOSH IT WAS THE WORST! But did I somehow manage without attaching them to a glowing screen? I DID! And there were a fair share of public meltdowns, tantrums, whining, complaining--because guess what, they are KIDS, and that's what kids do. But if we stick an iPad in their face (and pretend to be ok with it because it's "educational"), just so we can have a peaceful grocery store experience, how can we expect them to learn to function in real life without that constant stimulation? (I ran out of breath reading that last sentence, did you?) 
I am absolutely not a perfect parent, and I pray every day that I'm not screwing these kiddos up too badly.  But I do work ridiculously hard to make sure my kids get dirty, breathe fresh air, do chores, don't rely on screens for constant stimulation, know how to be creative, have original thoughts, and entertain themselves. I would love to hear YOUR ideas on how to better keep kids connected to the real world, and not rely too much on electronic interaction. 
They seem to be coping just fine.
*I mentioned we soaped up in the river--it was the BEST, and I recommend it (but watch out for people coming down the hill--you'll have to run for cover in your skivvies). We use THESE SOAPS  --they are biodegradable and don't mess up the water and vegetation :) **I also mentioned Chatbooks! Do you get these? It's a subscription that I use through my Instagram (you can also create books without IG, but it's so easy and brainless to do it how I do). Every 60 photos I post it sends me a notification that my book is ready--then I can edit captions, take out photos, or do NOTHING, and it will send my photo book automatically--each book costs $8. We LOVE them, and look through them so often (we've been getting them for the last 2 years)--they are great little scrapbooks. If you aren't yet using Chatbooks, go sign up and use the code SHEENA to get 20% off your order now through the end of the month.
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Source: http://inthelittleredhouse.blogspot.com/2016/07/coping.html
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nickelnumber91-blog · 6 years
Text
Coping
Road trip prep. Kids, you're in charge of  the cookies.
My alarm went off at 4:00am—an abrupt wakeup after finally finishing packing just three hours earlier. I snoozed it once…..ok, twice, and then we shoved the kids (still half asleep) into what little space was left in the loaded car, and headed west. It was a lonnnnnnng drive across Nevada—driving into the wind the entire way, dust blowing onto our roadside break of turkey and cheese. 
Thanks to the Internet and a few pointers from friends, we had a couple “ideas” where we may want to set up camp for the next four nights-we are not usually great at making FIRM plans….we are more “general idea” kind of people. You could say we are almost always winging it.  We headed down a 10 mile dirt road towards what we knew would be THE. MOST. AMAZING. campsite ever—in the trees, right on the lake, perfect. We were tired, hungry, and ready to get settled. Last fall we bought a little pop-up trailer—we figured as often as we camp, it would be nice to get out of the elements occasionally. We have loved it so far—we are always able to find secluded places to park it off the beaten path and keep away from crowds; we had planned on this time being the same.
We could faintly see the clear blue water through the trees, and were relieved and happy to have finally arrived after a full day in the car. But then we pulled up and saw what seemed to be a “local’s only” party….and we were definitely not invited. A few cars and tents scattered around near the water’s edge—no room at the inn—and here’s the kicker, the only place to turn around was occupied by several cars. And we were pulling a trailer. Whoops. 
Robby handles these situations much better than I do—we slowly drove through—every head turned. He laughed and waved like we were in a parade “we’re from out of town. Obviously. We didn’t know this place was so popular”. I sat in the passenger seat sweating and sinking lower and lower in my seat, wondering how we were ever going to get out of this place with nowhere to turn around. We inched our way through the trees—Robby maneuvering our set up  (that all the sudden seemed like a TRAIN in such tight quarters) and finally managed our way out, using a 57 point turn. We peeled out and kicked up dust as we sped away—except totally opposite of that, because the trailer only allows us to go so fast—and laughed all the way back out to the main road. At least we gave the locals a good laugh, right!? We didn’t want to take our chance down anymore unknown roads, so we put our tail between our legs and headed towards a campground.
California!
We got camp set up around ten—it was 45* in Lassen, and we were still in flip flops and shorts and really too exhausted to do anything but crawl into bed and crash. So we chose sleep over dinner and called it a day. 
We took our time waking up the next morning, ate eggs and bacon until we couldn’t eat another bite, and loaded up our packs to head out.. We spent the next three days hiking, paddling, fishing, exploring volcanoes, and completely disconnecting from the outside world. No phone service, no work, no emails to respond to, no worries really—except how stinky our armpits were and how tangled our hair was getting--it was truly the best.
We always manage to find winter in summer.
As we packed up one evening after a day on the lake—fitting kayaks, fishing gear, granola bar wrappers and tired kids into the car, an older gentleman came over—he and his wife were from Los Angeles and driving through the area. He struck up a conversation about our day. “How was the lake? (perfect. empty.) How was the fishing? (more fishing, less catching.)”, and what really struck me, “and your kids LIKE this stuff? How do you make them do all this? How do they cope without their Playstation?” 
“Well…..this is kinda...what we DO. They like to play outside—we actually go camping all the time”. 
“You mean, you just go out into the woods?” 
“yep”………….. 
If we were living in a cartoon world his eyes would have popped out of his head and his jaw would have hit the ground. 
“Huh.”
end scene.
we had the lake to ourselves.
This conversation really got me thinking. As I type this, we are driving back after eight days on the road. We are exhausted—both physically and mentally, tired of camp food, and absolutely filthy—our best “shower” was soaping* up in a river, hoping the icy cold current would rinse away some of the grime. I miss my animals and my garden, yet  I’d happily continue on down the road—I am happiest when I’m out exploring somewhere new. It’s who we are, it’s what we do, and it’s PART of the reason my kids can “cope without their Playstation” (which by the way, we didn’t tell the guy we didn’t even have one.) 
But, it’s only part of the reason—I realize that our particular lifestyle is not for everyone, and that’s ok. But there ARE other ways to keep kids from being completely dependent on screens, gadgets, gizmos, and the need for constant stimulation and entertainment.  Here are a few of my ideas: (I'm not saying this is the only way to parent, it just seems to work for us:)
Don’t buy them screens/gadgets/gizmos/etc. Hey that’s easy—and cheap! My kids are not this special breed of children who have no desire to glue their faces to something plugged in. But it’s a lot harder to do when they don’t have access to it. They don’t have their own phone or ipad, and we have an old xbox with 4 games that they can earn time for on weekends after all their chores are done--it's GREAT bribery!  (ps. I think Minecraft is a GREAT game! So much creativity to unleash!) Do they ask for all the above mentioned stuff? Do they say “but alllllllllllll my friends have ______” They DO! And guess what I say? “I don't care!" And occasionally I like to throw in things like "because I'm the mom and I say so", and then I feel super legit. I realize that as my kids get older, this one is unavoidable, so we will:
Set limits. Maybe you are a cooler parent than me and your kids have a gadget or two. Great! But they don't need to have it in hand alllllllll the time. I started an Instagram account so my kiddos could post the pictures they take and share them with cousins and grandmas and grandpas (and mostly so we could print more Chatbooks!) I log them in so they can post a few photos, we look (together) at what's going on with our cousins, and then I log them out--no time wasted mindlessly scrolling, and no wondering what garbage they saw on Instagram. But they feel connected to their cousins who live far away--win win! When they want to use the computer they have to ask--I want to know what they'll be doing. 
Have other options. As much as I wish we could--we can't spend 100% of our time outside. We are a movie loving family and movie nights are our favorite, but I hate the tv always being on--it's such an easy "out". We've had a scorcher of a summer, and some afternoons we have to hide out in the house to beat the heat, but we are making sure to do lots of reading, writing, and artwork instead of letting the tv constantly entertain us. 
Don't start them so young! I will probably ruffle so many feathers by saying this, but I honestly can't believe how many babies and toddlers I see with a screen in their hand--the grocery store, church, restaurants--everywhere. I somehow raised my babies without a screen in hand (they weren't even invented yet.) And when I say that, it sounds like I raised my babies in the 1800s and just let them play with tumbleweeds, but really it was just a few years ago, I promise. Was it hard to go to Target with a 4 year old and 2 year old? OH MY GOSH IT WAS THE WORST! But did I somehow manage without attaching them to a glowing screen? I DID! And there were a fair share of public meltdowns, tantrums, whining, complaining--because guess what, they are KIDS, and that's what kids do. But if we stick an iPad in their face (and pretend to be ok with it because it's "educational"), just so we can have a peaceful grocery store experience, how can we expect them to learn to function in real life without that constant stimulation? (I ran out of breath reading that last sentence, did you?) 
I am absolutely not a perfect parent, and I pray every day that I'm not screwing these kiddos up too badly.  But I do work ridiculously hard to make sure my kids get dirty, breathe fresh air, do chores, don't rely on screens for constant stimulation, know how to be creative, have original thoughts, and entertain themselves. I would love to hear YOUR ideas on how to better keep kids connected to the real world, and not rely too much on electronic interaction. 
They seem to be coping just fine.
*I mentioned we soaped up in the river--it was the BEST, and I recommend it (but watch out for people coming down the hill--you'll have to run for cover in your skivvies). We use THESE SOAPS  --they are biodegradable and don't mess up the water and vegetation :) **I also mentioned Chatbooks! Do you get these? It's a subscription that I use through my Instagram (you can also create books without IG, but it's so easy and brainless to do it how I do). Every 60 photos I post it sends me a notification that my book is ready--then I can edit captions, take out photos, or do NOTHING, and it will send my photo book automatically--each book costs $8. We LOVE them, and look through them so often (we've been getting them for the last 2 years)--they are great little scrapbooks. If you aren't yet using Chatbooks, go sign up and use the code SHEENA to get 20% off your order now through the end of the month.
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Source: http://inthelittleredhouse.blogspot.com/2016/07/coping.html
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