#and in fact I was surprised his canon suicidal tendancies never showed up | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

llycaons · 1 month

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something else I really love about feast and famine is how wwx isn't all 'wow lan zhan you're the best I can't believe you've been putting up with me I'm SO grateful you're literally perfect even though I'm so needy thank you so so so much' bc that sentiment arises in a lot of fics that handle his trauma or mental health and it's SO tiresome not to mention ooc. like it's not there for no reason bc wwx did express gratitude in canon and lwj IS a really good and supportive partner, but it's really refreshing to see wwx in a stable and reliable enough relationship where, except that one time he was triggered and panicking, he literally never once doubted that lwj would support and stand with him, nor did he ever feel the need to even thank lwj for being a good partner, even through the extremely heavy and difficult work of supporting him through what happened

and they DO communicate a lot, it's more that the gratitude is left unsaid because it's mutually understood to be unnecessary. and as much I'm in favor of them communicating their gratitude to each other, I feel like this dynamic for them is so much healthier and more mature and illustrates how strong their relationship is and how much they trust each other. also the idea of lwj as this...saintlike martyr who nobly supports and reassures a self-hating wwx is really tiring. he has his own struggles to be sure, but he has them away from wwx and the writing doesn't frame him as some tragic, self-sacrificing hero for it. like I love lwj but that's what it should be about, right? this was always going to be wwx's story first and foremost and I really appreciate works that let it be that

#like lwj freaking out to his brother or telling jyl about his trauma around his mom and going to support groups #that was so necessary and important for him. and wwx probably knew he was doing it. but he and the narrative didn't make it wwx's problem #OR make a big deal of not making it wwx's problem which is the more annoying and common trend #one of my early criticisms abt this fic was actually that they were TOO well-adjusted and healthy #wwx's past trauma seems to be limited to whatever made him scared of dogs and getting disowned as a teenager #which is awful to be sure but not rly comparable to canon #and in fact I was surprised his canon suicidal tendancies never showed up #but I think he was in a safe and supportive enough environment that that also made sense #like. everything possible that could be done was done. lwj came back from his trip. jyl was with him from that first morning #jc came in to help even though he fucked it up initially I think wwx clearly was really happy to have him there #he didn't have to work or worry about food or money or being alone #not that the current system is perfect obviously. like he did get a bunch of therapy and specialized therapy but #he got medical care immediately which while necessary was ALSO traumatizing and went to support groups which ALSO were horrible/demeaning #but overall compared to canon post-SS #he was able to break down and process everything in a healthy way #instead of suppressing his trauma because he has an obligation to be strong for others or to keep people alive #in canon he doesn't really have that freedom until postres. and then post-travels even #and by then things have faded with time. but I wonder if that makes it easier or harder to process them #esp since most of the people who he was close to back then are all gone #anyway. fic I think about literally constantly but idk if I can reread it all again it's very painful and heavy. like most of it but #the hospital scene is just so horrifying #not my favorite but up there maybe. I certainly regard it higher than a place to hide for exactly the reasons listed in the post #the first sex scene is so cringe tho 😔 I must sound like a maniac. like that post about showing ppl hxh for the first time #but it's so well-written besides that part I PROMISE #suicide tw #just a mention but eh #ficblogging

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