#and is like Wow! New Graveyard Keeper fandom takes!

[taco-night-frenzy]

Graveyard Keeper Review

I couldn't post this on Steam since I technically don't own it there (even though I paid for the DLC) but I wrote this all out for a Steam Review and I am not wasting it.

ANYWAYS. Here's my review of the game Graveyard Keeper under the cut.

Warning, it is negative, and I did not like it very much. I don't hate it though. I gave this game a solid 40 hours with all the DLCs.

Really thought I'd like this game, but it gets old and it gets old FAST. I wouldn't say it's a terrible game by any means, I legit got some entertainment out of it at the start, but it quickly falls apart when you realize you just never…. do anything. I played this game with all the DLCs installed and I think that give it a feeling of lots of 'content' and made it addicting for a while when I wasn't quite sure what awaited me.

This is like baby's first Factorio/Stardew Valley game but you get the worst of both worlds.

You're tasked to be a Graveyard Keeper, but honestly, that's like 10 percent of the game. You very rarely do any graveyard keeping. And when you do, like everything else in this game, it is extremely poorly explained. The thing you'll be spending more time than anything doing is just… walking back and forth. You're given a clunky teleport pretty early on and maybe later you'll find out you can keep buying speed potions if you can't live like this anymore, but that seems to be it. There's no mounts, there's no better system of travel, no upgrading that.

The gameplay revolves around your standard Factorio / Stardew Valley type things… gather resources, find a way to min/max gathering those resources etc. It's a bit addicted at first because min/maxing them is incredibly easy when you understand the game. Sadly, when you understand the game, you also realize there is nothing awaiting you for doing any of these tasks. The 'rewards' you get are mediocre at best.

The soundtrack is also just… not good. You get maybe 2 songs on a 2 minute loop for this intensely long grindy game. Bring your own music.

I'd say by far the worst part of this game though is the writing. I don't think this matters to some people and that's fair, but the writing here is just bland, boring, dry, and riddled with typos and spelling mistakes. There's some sort of spelling error in almost every scene.

The plot and the characters are way worse than I expected. The plot turns out to be an ISEKAI. Yes, that's right. This is a cut and dry ISEKAI somehow. You play as John Milk Toast Normal Guy and get hit by a car and end up in this boring world that makes you a Graveyard Keeper. That was a red flag off the bat, but I tried to be open minded.

Throughout the game though, you'll learn that not a single one of these characters is likeable in any sense. They're all vaguely buttheads and kind of rude. They have a lot to say, but it's never fun, it's just bad stale jokes and quips without any kind of style or flair added to them.

(Note: I LIKE rude characters. But they're ALL weirdly low level rude and dull as dishwater.)

The OTHER red flag should have been noticing all the DLCs just titled after popular TV shows. Stranger Sins, Better Save Soul, etc…. none of these references have literally anything to do with DLCs. It is just, "Hey this one is sin related, let's make the title look like Stranger Things."

And tying in with the rewards sucking, your rewards 90% of the time are just waiting through these incredibly dull scenes that feel like they were written by a 15 year old boy going through an edgy phase (but also doesn't want to upset Mom)

Final Bit: This game is just sadly mediocre. It's not a terrible game, but it is certainly not good. It has no strong points. Play Factorio, Oxygen Not Included, something like that if you need the grind. Play Stardew Valley or Sun Haven if you want that Harvest Moon farm feel. This game does not scratch the itch of either. If you can get the full game and the three DLCs all at once for extremely cheap? I guess it's not the worst, but it is still not fun enough.