#and it will be - surprise - certain ineffable couple-themed

[curiouslissa]

Crowley wakes up on the first day of October like😲

This is for two prompts: "Warmth" from OTP-tober by colorfulcore

and "Soft" from Artober by scila_e_kanon

because I was unable to choose one:))

[nostalgicidiot]

I was tagged by @ifishouldvanish to share 9 albums I’ve been listening to lately 🥰. Thanks a lot! The Spell by Cellar Darling | They are a Swiss progressive/folk metal band who relased their second album this year and I was enamored immediately after falling in love with their first one last year. It’s a concept album and I simply love the narrative (a girl falling in love with death) and how it is structured/implemented. I love its complexity and apparent contradictions: soft parts followed by heavier ones, the use of classical and folk elements, and I’m just a huge fan of Anna’s voice and could listen to her all the time. My absolute favorite piece would probably be Fall, (which I had to put on my Ineffable Husbands playlist ofc), which stands out because it is much shorter than the rest of the songs and uses a very different style, sounding almost ethereal…and I’m so in love with it. The entire album is an interesting and beautiful piece of art imo. It was described as a dark fairy tale by critics and that’s exactly what it sounds like.

The Sticks by Mother Mother | Mother Mother are what the kids call a mood (they probably don’t use that term anymore but oh well). Mostly upbeat music with much darker and sometimes very funny, sarcastic lyrics? If I were a song, I’d probably be one by Mother Mother. I love this album because it’s one of my go-tos when I want some nice background music for working on things. And I mean that in the best way possible: it’s really motivational without being too distracting, if that makes sense? It’s such a nice indie rock album which perfectly captures the notion of wanting to retreat into a remote forest and stay there for a couple of months? (While you don’t do that, ofc, and instead choose to pretend-smile through it all.) Also, Dread in My Heart will probably be my personal theme song for forever. (Little Pistol is my favorite. Closely followed by Infinitesimal. It’s such a good album tho.)

Echoes by Pink Floyd | Oh boy, where do I start this with this one? Pink Floyd is one of my all-time favorite bands. Never stood a chance, because the same is true for my parents. So what’s better than to listen to one of their best of albums which contains all the gems? I half-jokingly stated that I want The Great Gig In The Sky to play when I’m on my deathbed, because it stirrs something in me I cannot describe and I legit cry every time I listen to it. Shine On You Crazy Diamond is an experience in itself, Wish You Were Here is a classic ofc (and I use it on nearly every fanmix, whoops), Time throws me right into a midlife crisis and I will forever be soft for Nobody Home (which isn’t on there but deserves an honorary mention). Electra Heart by Marina and the Diamonds | I’ve been a fan of Marina ever since I heard Hollywood for the first time. Well, it’s been more of a gradual process of hearing this song for the first time, thinking “nice” and then forgetting about her until Electra Heart hit the market and found its way into my CD collection. I always gravitate back to Marina at some point, her lyrics are on point, I love her voice, and she expresses this peculiar and particular feeling of temporarily lostness so well? I love all of her albums, but Electra Heart has a special place in my heart, because it was the one that made me fall in love with her (and I’m very glad I did). Black Holes & Revelations by Muse | It’s the sound of my youth. Seriously, I take a trip down memory lane whenever one of their songs comes on. While I don’t listen to them as often as I used to, I still love them a lot and admire their artistry, they are so versatile and never fail to deliver (psychadelic songs and sad ballads on the same album? I love). It’s hard to pick a favorite album, I mostly chose this one to listen to because I was in the mood for it. Masseduction by St. Vincent | She’s been around for some time and I’ve mainly dismissed her music until last year. It’s not that I disliked it, it just wasn’t something I actively tried to get into? Then spotify started to put a few of her songs on my mixes of the week and the rest is history (I was a fool because her music is right up my alley and I should have known). I had Los Ageless on repeat for weeks (the piano version is beautiful as well, with a completely different vibe) and Smoking Section, Happy Birthday Johnny, and New York suffered the same fate. I can’t list them all but I’ve really enjoyed this album. (On a different one, but All My Stars Aligned? Such a beautiful, beautiful song) The Silent Force by Within Temptation | So I’m seeing them live next year (still cannot believe it) and this has sparked a renewed interest in their music. It was never gone, but I need to be in a certain mood to listen to their songs. With Muse I was talking about memory lane, when it comes to Within Temptation it’s more like an express highway. So many memories connected to their music, especially to this album - man that was a wild time (more like metaphorically speaking, it was a pretty dark period in my life, actually). Still, most memories are good ones because they were the first (symphonic) metal band I ever listened to and that opened whole new doors for me. Even after almost 15 years (boy do I feel old), this album has lost nothing of its magic and I love coming back to it. No Need To Argue by The Cranberries | I recently binged Derry Girls and it definitely made an impact in more than one way. Been a fan of the Cranberries for a good chunk of my life and this album is one of my favorites. Like ever. It’s crazy how much memories are connected to music, right? The Virgin Suicides (OST) by Air | First things first, that movie…kinda traumatized me. Is it smart to listen to its soundtrack then? Probably not. I’m not known for smart decisions, so it should not come as a surprise that I do so regardless. Especially because I think it’s a great album. Playground Love is such a good song and the rest of the others do not disappoint either. It has a very weird vibe to it (which perfectly matches the movie), but sometimes that’s what I’m in the mood for. But nothing will ever beat Le Voyage de Pénélope” for me when it comes to Air. I’m gonna tag @mightynott @bogsnails @queenology @aziraphae @regalpotato @thesongandthesunset and everyone else who reads this and wants to do this!

[sanrionharbor-blog]

For Everybody Still Worried About the Leaks

Clues from the Cast Interviews, GRRM Hints, and My Own Gut Feelings

Disclaimer: Hey, nobody knows nothing, but life’s too short to stress about things we can’t control, and stories are supposed to be maps to help us learn more about ourselves and about life in general–not hair-pulling inducements.  So I’m going to enjoy all the speculating that I can regarding the GOT season finale, and want to share some thoughts on why I think certain “leaks” are most likely bunk.

I’m mostly focusing on the pervasive “Does Tyrion die by trial?” leak, and everything that links to that, including any betrayals or major deaths.

Tyrion’s Ending and The Ending, In General

First, let’s quote Peter Dinklage himself:

I had all these ideas in my head and a version of one of them is how it ends up [for Tyrion]. David and Dan have a brilliant version of what I had. If I use any adjectives it will give it away. But I love how it ended up. And how it ends up for everybody. They had a beautiful gentle touch with some, and a hard touch with others.

But that’s just on Tyrion’s ending. Before I get into what that quote tells us, let me quote what other people have said about the Overall Ending of Game of Thrones:

Nikolaj Coster-Waldau:

I’ve never read anyone who got the whole thing. And when I read it the first time, I was blown away.

George R.R. Martin:

So many readers were reading the books with so much attention that they were throwing up some theories, and while some of those theories were amusing bulls*** and creative, some of the theories are right…At least one or two readers had put together the extremely subtle and obscure clues that I’d planted in the books and came to the right solution.

What the above quotes tell me is:

No one has guessed the ending completely–but parts of the ending? Yeah, they’ve been guessed. Which just goes to show how much this show and its themes have resonated not only with GRRM, but with his audience. Because,as a writer, I can tell you that no storyteller tells a story alone. There’s something guiding us and we can’t put a finger on it but it’s often the source of our best ideas. And it’s the same ineffable something that stirs all of us when we’re creating, sharing, and participating in stories. It’s the reason you see the same patterns in stories over and over. In short, the fact that part of the ending CAN be guessed is NOT a bad thing. It’s natural. Some postmodern storytelling theories have taught us that tricks and surprises are where it’s at–but a story isn’t true unless it can surprise us and, in retrospect, give us the only answer that makes any sense. You can see a pithier version of this kind of storytelling in Ye Olde Riddle–for example, the Sphinx in Oedipus Rex could tell us the answer to her riddle is orange, and that would throw us for a loop, but it would tell us nothing and mean nothing and add nothing to the story and thus would be forgotten. Surprise doesn’t count unless it has a ripple effect. So, about-face turns and OOC arcs may shock and subvert, but they’ll ultimately end up as dross and not as gold. (But hey, more on my thoughts on what can and can be accepted as canon in the last blurb below!).

Now, has anybody assumed that Tyrion would betray Daenerys and end up dead simply for 1) loyalty to the Lannisters, 2) suddenly losing faith in humanity?, or 3) suddenly wanting to usurp power himself? No. This is not a popular theory by a longshot. Tyrion dying? Sure. Somebody betraying Daenerys? Sure. Tyrion as a ruler? Sure. But this very specific, shoehorned version of the story is simply too contrived to have been picked up by fans organically.

The leaks so far have painted nothing but harsh endings for ALL the characters. Don’t tell me those leaks are pro-Stark. Those leaks point out backstabbing, loneliness, and emotional stagnation–forget what characters live, think about what these leaks have said about these characters. Not only does this not jive with the “bittersweet” aspect of the ending, it doesn’t jive with Dinklage’s assertion that, while some characters will go down harshly (R.I.P. Missandei especially–at least Edd and Jorah and Beric got heroic deaths and funerals), others will be treated gently. A heartbroken Brienne? A cold, lonely, manipulative Sansa? A suddenly hopeless, headless Tyrion? I don’t think so. (I also don’t think that means that Brienne and Jaime will necessarily ride into the sunset–but I do think we’ll have Jaime’s feelings for her confirmed, along with the completion of his redemption arc. I also don’t think that means Tyrion definitely won’t die–but I don’t think he’ll be character assassination, either. And I also don’t think that Sansa WILL end up in a canon relationship–but, logically, they can’t leave all the Stark’s COMPLETELY UNABLE TO LOVE, and um, somebody has to be willing to have legitimate heirs to the Stark House. Ok, just to continue this aside, but it seems theoretically impossible to me that the Stark House, which is all about the continuation of the Starks and the independence of the North, would not be given any canon marriages/alliances at the end of their arc. Arya’s already rejected marriage, Bran drove Meera away, and Sansa’s always wanted a happy marriage, even if she’s got very understandable trust issues right now. Anyhow–).

Peter Dinklage was able to guess how his character arc ended. What are the odds that Betraying Somebody He Cares About Without Good Reason (Daenerys–I could see him betraying her reluctantly, but not easily)/Being Betrayed By Somebody He Cares About (Sansa)/Dying Guilty After All The False Trials His Character Has Been THrough were in the mix? I don’t think so. Dinklage has gone on record multiple times to say how much he admires Tyrion and thinks he’s a good person. He’s also gone on record stating that Sansa and Tyrion’s relationship is full of true affection. Even if Tyrion dies and/or he and Sansa don’t end up as a couple, betrayal just seems so far out of the scope of what these characters’ storylines have been building to. And again, I can’t see that being even one version of one of Dinklage’s headcanons. What I think is most likely? A) Hand to the Ruler, B) Part of a new council that replaces or supplements the King/Queen, C) the King himself, or D) a heroic death.

How Long They’ve Planned the Ending:

They had talks with GRRM in 2014

They’ve been planning the ending for five years

They’ve known it was Arya who would take out the NK for three years

So some decisions weren’t set in stone, even by GRRM (such as who would take out the NK…an interesting thing not to know, actually, but that just points out how inflated the importance of the Others/White Walkers was–do I still think it will be handled better by GRRM, yes, but that’s another story), and even if D&D’s execution feels more like “here’s an outline of what’s happening” rather than “here’s the organic progression of that storyline,” I can only imagine that if core pieces were given by GRRM AND they’re not completely winging it, then there will be a certain amount of narrative cohesion once this comes full-circle.

Let’s not forget, we still have a third WTFudge moment that was came straight from GRRM himself, with the other two shockers being Hodor’s origin and Shireen Baratheon’s death. Could this third twist be Dany going completely mad? Maybe, though it doesn’t fall into the same category of completely-unexpected-but-honestly-possible, like Shireen and Hodor. Only because the foreshadowing for Dany’s madness was heavy-handed in the last few seasons (taking away the ‘unexpected’ bit), and is now quite uneven here in Season 8.

I think the third twist will likely be a specific action (a la Shireen’s death) or another origin story-type twist (a la Hodor). Some people have speculated that “Tyrion’s Trial” would make for that final twist, but here’s why I don’t think so:

The Nature of the Leaks

It’s very interesting to me that this leak, supposedly this Huge Most Important Leak, was one of the very first ones released. Like, months ago. While the rest of the leaks, the ones that have actually been accurate, are usually only released at the max a few days before each episode airs.

It’s also interesting to me that HBO has not done more to shut down this particular leak.

And, I would not put it past HBO to have actually filmed one entire fake-out scene. Most of the Dragon Pit/South scenes were filmed after the first three episodes, so they probably knew that they had the time and money to just throw fans for another loop. Sound tinfoily? Perhaps, but the idea that this big twist–and a twist that so far doesn’t make much sense given what we’ve seen in what is now ⅔’s of the season–was such an easy leak just makes me suspect.

Another possibility? Tyrion IS on trial, but is pardoned. Or Tyrion thinks he’s on trial, but it turns out to be somebody else’s funeral (a la that Littlefinger Fake Out 2.0.). I’m not saying any of this makes for the best handling of his character or for a particularly compelling scenario, but considering we haven’t seen it, I can’t say for certain.

GOT’s Recent “Plot Twist” Pattern

D&D have switched to information-withholding tactics in the last few seasons. Just look at Sansa and Arya’s arc and the Littlefinger Fake Out. Were these well-written? Not entirely–but they don’t make for the worst entertainment either. Yeah, we had better quality storytelling in the first four seasons, but soap opera can still be fun.

And how long have they been teasing Dark!Sansa without actually delivering? And let’s not forget–show-Sansa’s arc is still, broadly, based on book-Sansa’s arc. Book-Sansa remains far more in tune to the archetype of the Lady/Maiden, while show-Sansa is slightly blended with Jeyne Poole’s arc (and, unfortunately, a dash of Pop Feminism). But the fact remains that whatever meeting D&D had with GRRM back in 2014 contained information based on the broad trajectory of Sansa’s arc as GRRM has been writing it. (I’m writing a character arc meta on Sansa that’ll be out…soonish).

And let’s just say I don’t see Dark!Sansa hinted very well in the books at all. Sansa learning to pull strings like Littlefinger and Cersei and Margaery? Heck yes. But Sansa will do it Sansa’s way.

So, given that D&D usually try to shock us by hinting at a character’s worst possible tendency AND by withholding information AND by trying to get us to see one scenario while giving us another (another example being Jon Snow vs. Night King actually being Arya vs Night King), I can very well see them turning Sansa into a reluctant last-minute ally of Daenerys, Tyrion being pulled out of hot water at the last minute, Jaime’s running to Cersei being about taking out Cersei not making out with Cersei (yeah sorry/not sorry about that one), and heck, maybe Dany won’t go mad–she’ll just realize she doesn’t want the Iron Throne anymore, or the Iron Throne shouldn’t exist, or she dies tragically but not as a monster. Time will tell.

Who We Haven’t Seen So Far That Can Introduce New Complications

1. Edmure Tully

Tobis Mennzies (Edmure Tully) has been confirmed to return this season. Could it just be a cameo? Maybe. But I wouldn’t put it past Sansa, Arya, and Bran to be planning a back-up plan to help out Jon (and thus Dany). Arya is probably planning on killing Cersei, Sansa can rally what’s left of the Tully’s, and Bran will hopefully do something Three-Eyed Ravenish (or regain some of Bran’s humanity–which would be a twist worth waiting for).

2. Khal Drogo

Motherhood is an important theme in Dany’s life. I think ultimately, book and show wise, it’s what’s truly important to her. She just doesn’t realize it. In this way, Dany is a very interesting parallel with Cersei. Both of these women are tempted to replace their intimate losses with power. They believe power will protect them and their own. And that mentality can slowly shift into the classic Mother Bear conundrum: Us vs. Them.

Now, Khal Drogo not only represents a happy time in Dany’s life where she was both powerful and protected, but where she was a mother. After her losses, she gained her dragons. She truly loves her dragons as children, but they are also a liability to everyone but Dany. Interestingly, Dany’s human child with Khal Drogo was a liability to everyone but the Khalasar. The priestess from season 1 knew this, and so she prevented it. It doesn’t make the loss any less of a tragedy, however.

Will we see the same thing play out here in the final act of Game of Thrones? I’m not sure, but Khal Drogo’s presence will be heavily symbolic. Either Dany will meet him in the afterlife or reject death another time–but perhaps she’ll realize that her true desires were always for belonging and motherhood (just not at the expense of her own free will).

And, as an aside–I’ve really come to see Dany in a different light this season. I’ve always been anti-Daenerys as Ruler, but Daenerys as a character is truly fascinating. So what I see implied in her final arc is truly heartbreaking (and I hope it’s handled better overall than it was, in snapshot, here in 8x04). [Dany’s also my dad’s favorite character, haha, and I respect my dad’s opinion almost more than anyone else’s, so she gets props for that too lol].

3. Robin Arryn

I have a feeling this will be a cameo, but honestly the worst-case scenario for me would be Sansa being engaged to him lol. It would certainly be a Margaery Tyrell move on her part (knowing she won’t have to marry him for some time and he’ll be easy to influence), but the Knights of the Vale are already dedicated to her and I’m a Sanrion shipper so you know where I stand on any other Sansa ship. ;-)

Regardless, the Vale could become an important wrinkle in the plot, and I’m all for us not having a complete Doomsday scenario.

And In The Worst Case Scenario

The worst case scenario is that the leaks are legit. Bran as an emotionless king? The Starks are forever alone? Tyrion’s character assassination? Bleh.

But I’ve already hinted at my philosophy on canon storytelling.

Look, most fanon is crap–but so is most fiction. There are millions of stories out there, but it’s hard to find (and tell) one that resonates across all borders of sex, ethnicity, age, and epoch. You know what CAN exist in both fanon and canon–and what actually matters as canon in the end? The stories that are true.

If characters don’t act true to themselves, if deep-in-the-bones themes suddenly drop off, if crucial scenes that are present in every single successful outline are missing (don’t go postmodern on me–just read The Story Grid), then that story is incomplete. And it’s a lie.

Madeleine L’Engle once said “All truth is God’s truth.” She was trying to make the point that fantasy, and fiction in general, is important because it tells the truth. It’s not about the facts (dragons aren’t real! This is just a TV show! Etc.). It’s about the truth (dragons can be beaten! There is wonder in the world! We are united by our mythologies!).

So no, fanon can be a lot more than making heterosexual characters gay or inserting fluff without dealing with the consequences of character actions or erasing parts of canon. Fanon can be more true than canon when the author is on the tail of the actual Story.

Steven Pressfield does a much better job of explaining this in The War of Art. Madeleine L’Engle does a much better of explaining this in Walking on Water. Shawn Coyne does a much better job of explaining this in The Story Grid.

So don’t just take my word for it.

For me, then, I’m excited to see how the show plays out. And I’m fine if certain things that I only WANT don’t happen–but if the story doesn’t have what NEEDS to happen, then I’ll sadly and reluctantly reject it, and wait for GRRM’s books to come out, or simply contribute to the ASOIAF lore as best as I can. Hopefully not as wish fulfillment, but simply to respect the core of the story itself.

Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk.

[gigglinggoblin]

Sprites: A Basic Guide

The Term

The term "sprite" has several connotations, depending on the context. Scientifically, a "sprite" is a variety of Low Fey with intelligence radically diverging from human—either due to lesser intellect, or a mind that is simply alien or animalistic.

The best-known breed of sprite is the lust sprite, though its status as a “true fey” has been...subject to debate. Lust sprites are otherwise a perfect fit for the label, however, as their minds are established more as afterthoughts than as real computing devices of any value.

Another type of true sprite, particularly common in the Wild East, is the fleece sprite (colloquially called the “sheepgirl” or “weresheep”). The fleece sprite, while intelligent, has a set of motivations more closely linked to basic animal needs (food, mate, sleep) than any sort of true human planning. They often struggle to understand basic concepts such as ambition, curiosity, and most emotional bonds beyond simple friendship.

Aside from their mental inhumanity, the second common trait of sprites is their adherence to the Primal Codes.

All fey are subject to their Primal Codes, to some degree—leannán sídhe are compelled to seek out creative artists, nymphs are forced to slavishly keep their word (with certain notable exceptions), and catgirls are compulsively flighty and distractable—but there are still the rare exceptions who are able to manage these compulsions to some extent. True sprites tend to be much more strictly bound, simply because their minds lack the creativity to act with other motivations and circumvent things.

Lust sprites are constantly driven to seek carnal delight, no matter what, even when it might put them in danger to do so. Fleece sprites are compelled by ineffable laziness—they can only fight this laziness when driven by their equally great lust, and usually, it's all they can do to grab onto someone and let their sleep-inducing fleece do the rest of the work. Holstaurs (also called "udder sprites"), while dangerously intelligent, are kept in check—partially, anyways—by their need to be milked. That and the Song Terror, a state brought on by a special druid song involving bells that can paralyze a holstaur for brief periods.

All sprites are bound under one common Code, and this, perhaps, is the easiest way to distinguish the sprite “genus”: The so-called Law of Yes, which binds sprites from committing the most overt types of rape. A sprite must obtain some manner of consent—be it through words or body language—that their target consents to sex before they can indulge. This law, however, is generally as badly abused as a demon's word. Even lust sprites have managed to work out that if they surround a man and dial their lust auras up as far as they can go, eventually, the human will break down. The Law of Yes exists as a delaying factor. Not any guarantee of safety.

The fact of the matter is, "sprite", as a term, has become rather confused since its inception. The strange variety of lust sprites, coupled with the easy genericness of the word "sprite", has led to it becoming a common term for any "simple" fey. Catgirls are sometimes condescendingly referred to as "kitten sprites", while the Thriae's addicted slaves are called "honey sprites" due to their seeming stupidity—actually a dazed state brought on by the mead they drink, though since they're kept constantly drunk when possible, there's no real distinction. Some dryads are even called sprites—many dryads connected to lavender, cannabis, lamb's ear and morning glories, among others, end up termed “flower sprites” simply for their manner. Most fey view this as a serious insult.

Sometimes, one need not even be fey to be mischaracterized as a sprite. Dopterines—also erroneously called “moth girls”—have been systemically branded as sprites by several institutions over the years. Up until recently, slavery of sprites was regarded as a legal gray area, and dopterines were included under this umbrella. Dopterines are, in reality, neither fey nor elf nor human, but this is often forgotten or ignored for convenience.

Finally, there is the common myth of the "True Sprite". A True Sprite is generally agreed to be a green-skinned, elfin-featured woman with pointed ears and a general mishmash of other fey traits, including hypnosis, implanted triggers, and a riddle fixation. This myth likely came about by word of mouth from humans who had encountered and misunderstood other sorts of fey, but it has become pervasive in folklore, rather like dwarves and other cryptids.

Overall, “sprite” has come to mean less and less over the years. It is essentially a form of slang at this point: A word that has been used to justify all manner of atrocities and indignities.

Examples

Species classifications are always an imprecise art, as any biologist will attest, and “sprite” is no exception. Even so, below is an incomplete list of fey for with the label is generally accepted:

Holstaurs/Udder Sprites: While highly intelligent, a holstaur's long-term goals start and end with her getting milked by attractive mortals. She enjoys adding to her harem whenever possible, and prefers to mate with humans, elves or dopterines who are under her milk's power. Holstaurs' empathy is limited to shared pleasure, and a holstaur is literally incapable of empathizing with a human's pain, sorrow or anger. To her, every problem someone else is dealing with is meant to be solved by drinking from her enormous breasts.

Lust Sprites: An entire separate essay could be written about these hiveminded creatures. They are obsessed only with pleasure, and rove the world in packs, hunting fey and mortals alike. They are roughly as intelligent as extremely clever dire parrots—they can speak, and have some limited reasoning abilities, but most of what they do is pure instinct.

Fleece Sprites: These fey are clever, but simple in what they want in life. They will happily spend days or even weeks lounging in each others' arms. Cannabis and lamb's ear dryads often keep them as “pets”. Their wool sends waves of drowsiness into anyone who comes into contact with it, including the sprite who wears it.

Ink Sprites: These fey are often likened to magpies for their eclectic, scatterbrained attitudes and general greediness. They have very weak attention spans, but love learning new things, and so are often found loitering in libraries. They view sexual conquest as a form of learning, to the great surprise and alarm of many librarians. Ink sprites have been used for political purposes on several occasions, as their compulsion to tattoo the true names of those they sleep with on their skin is a valuable tool in blackmail.

Bunnyfolk: Sometimes confused for rabbit-themed lust sprites, these fey are obsessed with one thing: Breeding. Bunnies can be male or female—male bunnyfolk are called jacks, and female bunnyfolk are called bunny girls. Bunnyfolk have extremely firm views on the uses for sex organs: A cock belongs in a cunt at all times, and a cunt without a cock inside it is close to perverse. The use of these organs for anything else is tantamount to blasphemy to a bunny. This often manifests as apparent homophobia, but relationships between two men or two women are actually fine by them, as long as they each have “the parts”. Bunny girls take sex extremely seriously, mainly because the final pleasure moment tends to be so overpowering for them, it constitutes something like a religious experience.

Silk Devils: Like the dust devils of the desert, this wind sprite resembles the shape of a woman as outlined by billowing silk. They are said to be fey cursed for ancient sins, and now, though held in the grip of unbearable lust, are capable of doing nothing but teasing their targets. This doesn't stop them from trying to get off, however, and their hypnotic spirals of flying silk have captivated many a traveler.

Jellyfolk: The jellyfish merfolk (not to be confused with slime dryads, below) are characterized by an overwhelming love for humans, and love to drift around near sailors and bring those sailors as much pleasure as humanly bearable. They also have a major tickling fetish, however, and frequent is the story of the jellyfish merman who got carried carried away and tickled his target until she could no longer steer her vessel for laughing. Though mischievous and a bit singleminded, jellyfolk are kindly enough, and some have even protested being considered sprites. It remains an issue of some controversy as a result, but their need for genuine consent has generally been interpreted as proof enough.

Slime Dryads: These men and women, made up entirely of brightly-colored slime, are only loosely considered dryads. They are dimwitted and sluggish, but dangerous, in their way. Some slime dryads will merely seek to sleep with “solid beings”, while others will fuck their target senseless, pump them with anesthetic, and slowly devour them alive. Only another dryad or trained druid can tell the difference between the two varieties.

[obscureliteraryhumor]

We Are Such Stuff As Dreams Are Made On: Cemetery of Splendour (Rak Ti Khon Kaen / รักที่ขอนแก่น 2015)

Last night, my sleep was filled with a series of vivid dreams, featuring the appearance of abundantly metaphorical imagery and almost-forgotten figures from my past. It was a deep and continuous sleep, and long. The evening prior, I finished myriad small but important tasks that I’d either forgotten or been putting off, and I did so with a vigorous energy previously hidden by layers of lethargy and procrastination. That afternoon, I watched Apichatpong “Joe” Weerasethakul’s Cemetery of Splendour (Rak Ti Khon Kaen / รักที่ขอนแก่น 2015). There’s a certain kind of film that reminds me of something Richard Brody once wrote, a sort of peek into his critical psyche, in a piece on the state of independent film in 2016:

"In any case, movies, and art over all, don’t help, can’t help, aren’t meant to help—in the short term or in specific terms. The good they do reaches deep into the marrow of the soul of a relatively few people and does so spontaneously, unexpectedly, irresistibly, decisively, and sometimes even unconsciously. The changes that the best movies wreak may not be perceptible in any reasoned public discourse close to the time of their release. But, for just that reason, these movies are all the more essential and enduring—they bring about changes in mood, tone, emotional tenor or temperature, changes in the inner life, in the inner inner life."

Most of the time, the film that reminds me of this quote is by Terrence Malick, or Andrei Tarkovsky, or even Shane Carruth (Upstream Color (2013)), whose images are often objects of delirious beauty. But Apichatpong here conjures another form of beauty, one less indebted to the realm of painting and photography and, thus, one that is more cinematic. Cemetery of Splendour moved me ineffably, and to try to render it less ineffable (more effable?) feels like an act of violence. Somehow, the best thing I can say about it is that it renewed my sense of the life force both within and surrounding me, motivating me from a within that’s outside of me, as it were. But since that’s way too vague, let’s get violent. Let’s say that what distinguishes the moving picture from the regular ol’ picture is the fact that the moving picture, um, moves. Yet this simple fact can sometimes be lost on cinemagoers and even filmmakers. The most common form of film “movement” is the cut, and when done well it evokes all the thoughts and emotions a good montage is supposed to. But that’s really less a movement and more a juxtaposition, a forcing of contrasts. Another common form of movement in film is the movement of the camera, most notoriously in the “shaky cam” cinematography that apparently only Paul Greengrass can do well. Usually, though, camera movements are tracking something within the frame, or emphasizing a character’s frame of mind, or even attempting to induce a frame of mind in the viewer (think of the camera placement in horror films). These are movements in the service of something else, and it can appear also in the manipulations of form in great works of literature, among other artistic media. No, what I have in mind, what this film showed me for the first time, is the kind of movement that’s in itself unexpected, radical, miraculous. It can happen in everyday life at any moment. The true magic of cinema is in capturing movement of this kind along with whatever it is that makes it astounding. Apichatpong’s camera is static, and his shots are long. But unlike the images of some of the aforementioned filmmakers, his images and compositions aren’t centered on beauty, natural or otherwise; in fact, some lingering shots are objectively ugly. What they do, and what Apichatpong wants them to do, is capture some kind of human action: a woman hanging laundry, the soldiers’ digging machines going at it, a man taking a shit among bushes and low trees. These actions are mundane, but the emphasis on their banality gathers the emotional, even sublime strength that’s non-cathartically released near the end of the film. That is the movement I have in mind: a single action both mundane and sublime. Cemetery of Splendour is about Thai soldiers who succumb to an inexplicable sleeping illness while digging a foundation for a secret government project (one character notes: And yet they dig out in the open!). Jen (Jenjira Pongpas) volunteers at the local “hospital” (an old schoolhouse) where the soldiers are taken care of, and there she befriends Keng (Jarinpattra Rueangram), a young woman who uses her powers as a psychic medium to assuage worried family members that their sons are doing okay. This is the first hint that the film is more than it appears to be, not only because everyone treats her with respect, including the doctors and nurses, but even more because psychics, of course, usually communicate with the dead. The soldiers seem to be having bad dreams, so the doctors bring in machines that employ light therapy to help calm them. Each machine has a long, curving LED tube (“They look like funerary urns,” one characters says) that changes color in tandem with the other machines as if each color were rising from the ground. The film has numerous scenes of the room and its furiously spinning ceiling fans slowly changing color in the dark of night, and this otherworldly imagery becomes a motif, a theme, and even a symbol for the film as a whole, reinforced by the sound effects of more significant scenes (ceiling fans, digging machines, night sounds) bleeding into the preceding and subsequent scenes. Jen, who has a bad leg, often prays at a Laotian shrine. One day as she’s enjoying some longgan at a picnic table, two beautiful women walk up to chat. Turns out, they’re the goddesses to whom she prays, and they come to thank her and to tell her that the sleeping sickness is caused by the still-warring ancient kings buried in the palace ruins beneath the school, who siphon off the soldiers’ energy. Here I should point out that, as talk of soldiers, kings, and Thailand should’ve hinted at by now, Cemetery of Splendour is on one level a political allegory, but it’s “about” politics the same way that Moby-Dick is “about” whaling: Yes, you can learn a whole frickin’ lot about whaling from reading it, but it’s so much more than a whaling manual. And Cemetery of Splendour is at one remove from even that—good luck learning much from the film about Thailand’s political troubles. Jen takes particular care of a soldier named Itt (Banlop Lomnoi), whose family doesn’t come to visit. For the viewer, he’s the stand-in for all the sleeping soldiers; for Jen, he’s the conduit to a unique perspective on life. One day, he suddenly wakes up and tells the surprised Jen that he could hear and understand everything around him while asleep. (Later at a night market stall, he adds that he can hear, smell, and perceive the heat of everything around them to an extended distance.) They and the other awakened soldiers go to the canteen for a meal. One soldier falls asleep, and the film implies that the rest of them do as well. Thus is the pattern of the film established: When Itt is awake, we follow his interactions and conversations with Jen; when he’s asleep, the film is free to do other things—follow Jen around, yes, but also give us haunting imagery of the sleeping soldiers and, in one mesmerizing sequence, of various nighttime scenes around town. There is never the sense of being haunted in the Western sense, as if unseen spirits were following people around, attempting to communicate or effect changes—the scariest scene is probably when Jen discovers that Itt’s notebook is filled with sketches that seem to depict the underground palace. The existence of something more than this empirical world is simply presumed, and when events are attributed to its influence, they and it are adapted to quickly and naturally. For instance, when the goddesses reveal themselves to Jen, she’s at first understandably shocked, but then they share the longgans together. And when Jen relates the explanation of the warring ancient kings to Keng and head nurse Tet (Petcharat Chaiburi), one of them jokes that at least the soldiers are kept useful in their sleep. Ingeniously, this attitude is forced on us by the film’s very premise: If we tried to explain the sleeping sickness, we would immediately get stuck, and the rest of the film would become meaningless. Only by taking it on its own terms, as it takes the lived-in mystery of its world, can we appreciate the artistry before our eyes. (I dare you to try to explain the scene, almost repeated later in the film, of pondside parkgoers rotating among benches as if playing a silent game of musical chairs.) The final main sequence intimately and powerfully brings together the two dimensions that Apichatpong toys with throughout the film. Jen and Itt are having a picnic when he falls asleep again. It’s a beautiful day, so she’s in no rush to get him back; who knows, he might wake up again. Keng passes by and offers to help them communicate. Itt (through Keng) asks Jen if she’d like to see what he sees, and she says yes. So he inhabits Keng’s mind (“possesses” would be too strong, since she’s still in control and can use her earthly perceptive faculties), and Keng and Jen take a walk through a park, which turns out to be a real-life famous religious park dotted with religious mantras and sculptures, some of them in ruins. Itt describes through Keng the ancient palace they’re walking through, pointing out thresholds and low ceilings, mirrors and thrones. Jen obligingly directs her gaze, and sometimes points out worldly things for Itt/Keng to look at, too: trees, leaves, sculptures, and flowers that she helps cultivate. They come across a pair of sculptures—a loving couple on a bench, holding hands, and beside that the same couple, now skeletons—and sit on a bench nearby. Jen shows Itt/Keng (but really Itt) her bad leg, rolling up her trouser to reveal its elephantine deformity. She offers Itt a homemade remedy to keep him awake, but instead he takes it from her, pours it onto Jen’s bad leg, and starts kissing it where the liquid has flowed. Amazingly, this scene works if we understand Itt/Keng to be either Keng or Itt: the psychic attuned to the other world, or the sleeping soldier inhabiting it. Itt/Keng’s ablutions and intimate blessings bring Jen to tears, and we too feel the full force of the connection between this world and the other world that ensconces it. But the film has one last surprise in store. Jen asks Itt/Keng to open her vision, and Keng stares into Jen’s eyes, telling her to open them wider, wider. And then: done. We don’t see any change, either directly, or indirectly through Jen’s actions, but by this point we’re far beyond doubting. The penultimate scene pairs a morning dance-aerobics session in the park with a soundtrack of an oracular French spoken song about a brick wall pretending to be soft and welcoming. And as if we, too, see this wondrous flowering brick wall, the final scene is a shot of Jen, staring in the direction of some boys playing soccer in the dug-up field, but really staring into the other world, wide-eyed. The soldiers’ plight is never resolved, as the goddesses foretell, but it’s rumored that the government will be moving them soon.