#and nancy... i see it as she's accepted her past and who she is

[flythesail]

Everyone can obviously feel how they want to feel about it but I've always felt the paths the drew crew decide on in the finale are reflective of their arcs

[andvys]

I knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss | part 8

Warnings: angst, heartbreak, mentions of weight loss and allusions to an ED, sexual harassment (reader being cornered by a guy & mentions of Billy groping reader in the past), grab some tissues this one is sad

Pairings: Steve Harrington x fem!cheerleader!reader , Steve Harrington x Nancy Wheeler

Summary: You spend one last night with Steve.

Word count: 10k

A/N: @mysticmunson thank you as always, angel. you always inspire me so much with your amazing ideas, I love u🤍 — also its mostly proofread but if there are any mistakes…. you didn’t see them!

series masterlist

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Steve stares at you with a mixture of hope and curiosity in his eyes. He can’t remember the last time he had seen you on his doorsteps. He knows that you aren’t here for the reasons he hopes for but his heart still holds onto that hope.

You look at him expectedly, your hands are shaking. There’s a snowflake on your eyelash, you wipe it away and blink as you look up at him. 

“Y-Yeah, come inside,” he says as he moves to the side. His gaze softens when your eyes flash with uncertainty, you look behind his shoulder. 

“Can’t you come outside?” 

“Y/n, just come in–”

“Steven, who is it?” You hear his mom say. You hear her footsteps and see her as she walks into the hallway, her eyes widen and a smile appears on her face when her eyes meet yours. 

“Y/n!” She smiles excitedly, “come on in, dear. What are you doing out there in the cold?” 

You really don’t want to step inside his house but you can’t say no to her and before you can even protest, she pulls you inside and wraps her arms around you, hugging you tightly. 

“It’s been so long!” Helen says. She pulls away and places her hands on your shoulders, “look at you – she’s getting more and more beautiful, isn’t she, Steve?” She turns around to face her son with a smile on her face. You look at him with narrowed eyes, he nods.

“Yes she is,” he says.

He is not making any of this easier for you. 

“Come inside, we are just about to eat dinner.”

“Oh no, I don’t mean to intrude, I just wanted to–”

“I won’t accept a no and you know you could never intrude, darling,” she says, shaking her head. “Come on, we got so much catching up to do! Take your coat off.”

She looks at you expectedly, she really won’t accept a no. You can’t help but chuckle, you take your coat off and hand it to Steve who holds his hand out. 

“Thanks,” you mumble as you look into his eyes. 

He smiles.

You look away from him, you fix your hair and smooth down your skirt.

“That’s a beautiful skirt,” Helen gushes, she reaches for your hand and pulls you further into the house.

Steve’s heart flutters when he hears your giggle. He watches you walk into the kitchen with his mom. He can’t help but feel excitement rushing through him at the thought of spending the night with you, he knows that this won’t mean anything and deep down he knows you came to talk about something that won’t leave him with a smile on his face at the end of the night but he can’t help but hold onto the hope that you might want to give him a chance – as silly as the thought is. 

He hears his dad saying your name with an excited tone in his voice, when he walks into the kitchen, he finds him hugging you. 

They are never this excited to see her. Steve looks down, a feeling of self hatred blooms in his chest. 

He ruined everything.

“Are you eating enough, kid? You look like you’ve lost some weight.” 

Steve raises his head to look at you, you raise your brows in surprise as you stare at his dad, a nervous laugh falls from your lips.

“Dad,” Steve warns when he notices your discomfort. 

His dad looks over your shoulder, waving his son off, he looks back down at you and wraps his arm around your shoulder as he leads you into the dining room. 

“Helen is making Lasagna tonight, it’s still your favorite right?”

“Yeah,” you chuckle.

“I’m glad you’re here, who else would I share all the garlic bread with.”

Another laugh falls from your lips and Steve has to close his eyes, he takes a deep breath. All this takes him back to all the Saturday dinners you have spent together. 

Idiot. Idiot. Idiot.

He shakes his head and opens his eyes as he looks at the ceiling. 

“It’s never too late to fix things, Steve.”

He feels a little startled by his mom’s voice. 

“Sometimes it is,” Steve says. “She hates me.”

She sighs and shakes her head at him, “she wouldn’t be here if she hated you–”

“She’s here because you wouldn’t take no for an answer,” Steve mumbles, rolling his eyes. He knows that you came here to talk, not to spend a family dinner with his family. 

“Yeah but she came here for you, to talk, I assume?”

Steve shrugs, he hears your voice in the dining room along with his dad’s laughter. 

“Not for the reasons I’d hope.”

She raises her brows in questions, she tilts her head and leans her hand against the counter. 

“What reasons were you hoping for?”

“A second chance, mom.”

“Well, you won’t get one if you don’t leave that girl of yours first,” she mumbles and reaches for the bowl of salad, pushing it in his hands and giving him a stern look, “you’re behaving like a fool, Steven.”

He closes his eyes again and clenches his jaw. He feels embarrassed. 

“You know, you remind me of Harold. He was breaking hearts left and right when he was younger, then he had this amazing girlfriend and guess what he did?”

“He cheated on her,” Steve mumbles, nodding, “you told me this story a thousand times already.”

“Yeah and I’ll tell it a thousand times more. I don’t want you to end up like my brother, Steven. Look at him now, he is old and miserable and hung up on a woman who has been happily married for the past twenty years.” 

“I’m not gonna end up like uncle Harold,” Steve sighs. 

“You’re on the best way there.” She points her finger at him and gives him a stern look as she leans closer, “you broke that poor girl’s heart – I can see the pain in her eyes and your father is right, she lost weight, she’s not doing well.”

Worry flashes in his eyes and the guilt that has been nagging at him comes rushing back. 

“I don’t want either of you to be miserable but I know that you will be if you don’t pull yourself together. She’s an amazing girl, Steve. Someday, she’s gonna try again and she’s gonna meet an amazing man who will give her everything she wants and you’ll regret letting her go.” 

Steve frowns. He knows that she is right. There will be someone who will give you the things that he never could but the thought of that makes him want to throw up and break down. 

The thought of you falling in love with someone else hurts him. The thought of you getting married to someone else, having kids and living that life without him makes him miserable. 

He can see why his mom is so afraid of him becoming like his uncle – he will if he doesn’t make things right. 

He snaps himself out of his thoughts when his mom squeezes his shoulder, “if you want her back, you gotta fight for this girl and it won’t happen overnight, Steve.” 

She gives him a look of sympathy, one that he doesn’t deserve. It was him who screwed up after all. 

“Yeah,” Steve whispers. He turns around and walks away, stepping into the dining room, he places the salad bowl on the large table and glances at you. You’re in the living room, sitting on the couch next to his dad who is showing you his new vinyl collection. He knows that you don’t want to be here, not like this. You are probably already regretting the decision of coming here. 

He sees the excited look on your face when you reach for the Fleetwood Mac Vinyl. You instantly begin to gush over the band, his dad chuckles at your excitement. 

His parents might not be around a lot but you had always gotten along with them, you were the one who convinced him to stay at home for dinners on the weekends, you were the one who convinced him to spend more time with his dad when he asked him to. Steve was angry at his parents for not being around and he punished them by giving them the cold shoulder when they were at home. You changed that. His relationship with his dad is better than it ever was, thanks to you. 

You have done so many good things for him.

He never did anything for you – he didn’t do any good. 

As he looks at you, he notices that they are right. You did lose some weight, your face looks thinner and the circles beneath your eyes are visible even through the concealer you are wearing. He feels sick, knowing that he was the one who caused – causes you so much distress. 

His dad leads you back into the dining room and Steve straightens up when your eyes lock. 

“Take a seat, darling. I’ll go help Helen in the kitchen.” He says, giving you a smile before he turns around and walks back into the kitchen, leaving you and Steve alone in the dining room. 

You swallow nervously and clear your throat. Fidgeting with the sleeves of your sweater, you look around. 

Steve stares at you, just taking in the sight of you in his house. Steve is convinced that you are the most beautiful girl in the world. 

You are nervous, he can tell by the way you are bouncing your knee and playing with the loose string on your sleeve. 

“Come here,” he says, gesturing to the chair that he pulls back. 

You nod and walk over to him, you sit down and turn your head to look up at him. He sits down beside you. This feels like a deja vu and you don’t know how you feel about it. 

“I’m sorry,” you whisper as you break the silence between the two of you. 

“What?” He mumbles, looking at you in confusion. “What are you sorry for?”

“I didn’t want to intrude–”

“You could never,” he says, interrupting you. Out of instinct, he places his hand over yours, causing you to freeze, he notices it right away and pulls his hand back, closing his eyes, he sighs, “I’m sorry. I’m just – I’m happy you’re here even though I know you didn’t come here for this.”

“We can talk later.”

He nods, swallowing nervously. He hopes the time will pass slowly tonight. 

He notices how calm you are despite the nervousness you are showing. He doesn’t know whether it’s a good or bad sign. The last time you had been together, you ended up kicking him out with tears streaming down your face and now you are calm, peaceful and there isn’t an ounce of anger in your eyes left. What does it mean?

A bad feeling settles in the pit of his stomach, something tells him that this night won’t end well.

“Did you have a nice night?” He asks as he watches your face contort in confusion, “with Eddie, I mean.”

“Oh,” you mumble. His question takes you back to the conversation you had with Eddie, the one about him. “Yeah, we went to the diner and then watched a movie at his place.”

Steve nods, keeping his composure. 

“Y-You spent the night with him?” 

You know that you don’t have to answer his question, it’s none of his business but you nod anyway and look into his eyes. 

“Yeah, sometimes he stays over at my place.”

His heart twists at your words. A sullen look takes over his face. He tastes that bitterness on his tongue. You say you’re just friends but he saw more than friendship between you both when you danced together but maybe it was just his jealousy that tried to make him believe that it’s more than that. 

“Oh.”

“How was your night?” You ask as though you care. You don’t want to hear about his night with Nancy. “Did you have fun?” 

Steve can see your clenched jaw – you are jealous. 

“It was okay.” The night was horrible and he hated every second of it. He didn’t want to be with her, he wanted to be with you. 

You stare at each other in silence for a long moment before you break eye contact. 

“I’m gonna see if your parents need help–”

“Don’t,” Steve says as he puts his hand on the back of your chair, holding himself back from touching you this time. “You know my mom won’t let you do anything anyway.”

His parents walk into the room seconds later, glancing between the both of you. By the looks on their faces, you can tell that they have been talking about you two in the kitchen. You don’t know what to think or feel but you can’t help but wonder; do they like her? 

She puts way too much food on your plate, the way she always does – she ignores your protests. 

“Do you want a glass of wine?” John asks you, jokingly of course. He holds the bottle up before he pours some of it into his wife’s glass. 

“John,” she chuckles, rolling her eyes. “They’re too young.”

You and Steve glance at each other with narrowed eyes. You have stolen a few bottles of his mom’s favorite wine and you’ve gotten drunk together.. a lot. 

“We used to be young too.” 

You chuckle at his words and at the sigh that leaves her lips as she sits down across from you, she waves him off. 

You would’ve thought that this would be awkward and well, between you and Steve it absolutely is but his parents make it less awkward. It all still feels so natural and it makes you sad. 

“Did you go to the dance last night?” Helen asks, reaching for the wine glass before taking a bite of her salad. 

You nod, “yeah, it was uh– nice.”

“Who was the lucky guy?” John asks, he glances at Steve with narrowed eyes as he bites into the garlic bread. 

Steve sighs. 

“I uh, I didn’t actually–”

“Eddie Munson,” Steve mumbles as he grips the fork tightly in his hand. 

His mom raises her brows at Steve, her eyes flash with amusement when she sees the very obvious jealousy on his face. 

His dad laughs and for a moment, you feel nervous. The Harringtons never seemed like judgmental people, despite the things people say about them but you know how people talk about Eddie and how cursed his last name is thanks to his father. 

“Wayne Munson’s boy?” He asks you. 

“You know Wayne?” You ask and straighten up in your seat. 

“Yeah! We were friends in high school, we didn’t have much in common but he was nice. We didn’t see much of each other after school but I liked him.”

You smile, feeling a little surprised at the revelation. 

“You were friends with Eddie’s uncle?” Steve mumbles with confusion on his face that could be easily mistaken with judgment. 

His dad leans back, giving him a stern look, “yeah, he was a real friend, son. You’re supposed to know what that is but you don’t put much value on real friendships – or relationships,” he mutters the last bit. 

You almost feel bad for Steve, almost. 

He deserves this. He deserves all of this and worse, he knows it. 

“Is he treating you well?” Helen asks, breaking the awkward silence in the room, “Eddie?” 

A nervous chuckle escapes your lips, you can’t help but blush when you feel all eyes on you. 

“Oh, we are not dating. Eddie and I are just friends,” you say before you finally take a bite of the Lasagna, hoping that you won’t get asked any more questions about this. 

“That’s a shame, I’m sure he is amazing.”

Steve glares at his dad. He feels his blood boiling. 

“Oh, he is,” you smile, “he’s very sweet. He drove Steve home the other day.” 

His parents look at you in surprise and then turn to look at Steve who tenses up a little. 

“When his car broke down.”

Steve turns to look at you and you can’t help but smirk when you see the annoyed look on his face. 

“That’s funny,” Helen laughs, “that’s how you and Wayne became friends, right?” She asks her husband who nods at her words. He begins to tell the story about the summer he and Wayne started hanging out. 

You listen intently while Steve begins to eat his food. You can sense his irritation, it’s been there ever since he brought about Eddie. He relaxes a little when his mom changes the topic and starts talking about her plans for Christmas this year. 

It’s weird for you to sit next to him, to sit at a table with his parents and eat dinner like nothing ever happened. At some point, Steve places his hand on the back of your chair when he is done eating. You don’t think that he realizes that he did, he is too absorbed in a conversation with his dad. 

When Helen gets up, you use the opportunity to escape as well, ignoring her protests, you help her clean up the table. You gather all the plates and ignore the looks he gives you. You walk into the kitchen and place the dirty plates next to the sink, you close your eyes and take a deep breath. 

All you wanted was to have a conversation, to have him lay all the cards on the table, to finally be completely honest with you. You didn’t want this because this is only making things so much harder. 

“Is everything alright?” Helen asks as she walks into the kitchen as well, carrying the dirty dishes over to the sink. 

You force a smile on your face and turn around to face her.

“Yeah, I’m okay.” You lie.

She doesn’t look convinced. She knows you almost as well as your mom does. She tilts her head and smiles at you, sadly. 

“It’s okay to not be okay, y/n.”

She places her hand on your shoulder, “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have pressured you into this.”

You shake your head, “no, it’s okay! You know I always liked the family dinner’s,” you smile, “and your cooking.”

She smiles warmly but the look in her eyes is one of sadness and sympathy. She knows that you love him, you always showed it and you still do, whether you know it or not. It’s in your eyes, it’s written all over your face. You may be young with a whole life and so many chapters ahead of you but one thing is for certain – there won’t be another love like this, not for you. He was the one for you. 

“How are you, y/n?” She asks. 

She doesn’t want to hear any lies, she wants to hear the truth. 

It’s a genuine question, not just a conversation started or a small check-up. She genuinely wants to know how you really feel. You don’t know why but it makes your heart clench in your chest and the tears that well up in your eyes are inevitable. 

You blink, trying to push them away. You don’t want to cry and break down in your ex boyfriend’s kitchen. 

You look down when you feel your bottom lip trembling. 

“I-I hate this,” you whisper as you continue to blink, hoping that your tears will vanish. “I hate that he did this, I hate that I miss him so much and that I love him even after he broke my heart.”

You feel so pathetic when you break into tears. 

“Oh y/n,” she whispers as she pulls you into a hug. She squeezes you tightly and rubs your back. “You will be okay – both of you.” She says and looks over at Steve who stands in the doorway with a guilty and sad look on his face. 

It hurts to see you like this, it’s something he will never forgive himself, to know that he was the one who did all of this. To know that he was the one who hurt the girl he loves more than anything else in this world. 

When you pull away from the hug and your eyes lock with his, you look a little startled. You quickly wipe your tears away and step back, “I-I’m sorry, I should go.”

Before he or his mom can react, you rush out of the kitchen and into the hallway. You put on your shoes and grab your coat, leaving the house quickly. The air is colder than it was before, the snow is falling peacefully. You sniffle as you wipe your tears away. You knew it was a bad idea to come here. You knew it. 

You hear the door shutting behind you as you walk down the driveway.

“Y/n! Wait!”

You don’t turn around, you continue to walk whilst you put your jacket on. You hear his footsteps coming closer, there is no use trying to run from him. 

“Wait!” He sighs. He reaches for your hand and pulls you back, he is surprised when you don’t push his hand away. He falls quiet when he looks at your face, you have wiped your tears away but the glassiness in your eyes is still present. “Y/n,” he says, softly. 

You hate the sorry look on his face, the soft eyes and the gentle touch of his hand. 

“You wanted to talk.”

“Can we do this tomorrow–”

“No,” he shakes his head, holding your hand tighter than before, “let’s do it now, please.”

“I just wanna go home, Steve.”

“Then I’ll drive you home and we can talk in the car.”

You shake your head. You hate that you feel so weak all of the sudden, that you struggle to push his hand away, that you struggle to look away from him. You don’t know what happened but it’s like every strength has left your body and you can no longer push him away from you with that cold front you put up before.

“I want to walk.”

He nods, “okay, then I’ll walk you home.”

“Steve,” you sigh. 

“Please,” he whispers, “I won’t let you walk home by yourself anyway. So you either get in the car or you let me walk you home.”

Sighing, you tear your eyes away from his and look down, you nod, “okay, let’s walk then.” 

You pull your hand out of his grip and turn around. 

The road is illuminated by the street lights, the snow glitters beneath it, it crunches under your boots as you step on it. You’ve done this way too many times before but usually, you would walk hand in hand, you would steal kisses from him and he would pretend to be annoyed, now there is just distance and awkward silence between you both.

At this point, you don’t even know what you wanted to talk about. 

You wanted answers but what are the questions? 

Why did you fall out of love with me? But wait. He said that he fell out of love with you and the next day he said that he never loved you in the first place and now, two months later, he claims that he lied to you when he said that he never loved you – apparently he still loves you even though he is with her. 

Why did you leave me for her? 

What does she have that I don’t? 

Why did you treat me like shit? 

Why are you so good to her? 

Why did you fall in love with her when you were supposed to love me?

“Why Nancy?” 

Steve furrows his brows and looks at you in confusion. 

“What?”

“It’s just, there have been so many girls that threw themselves at you but you never gave them the chance – at least, I hoped you didn’t.”

“I didn’t, y/n.” 

“Could’ve fooled me,” you mutter under your breath, “you flirted with them and expected me to be okay with it but you would get mad whenever a guy even looked my way.” 

If you would have had this conversation with him three months ago, he would have scoffed by now and either start a fight or kiss you to shut you up but now, he just stays calm and he looks at you with guilt in his eyes. 

She changed him in just a few weeks. 

“I know that it doesn’t mean much anymore but I never wanted any of them, those girls that I flirted with, I couldn’t give a shit about them,” he mumbles, rolling his eyes at his past behavior, “and to be honest, I didn’t do it to keep my reputation or whatever. I– god, that’s gonna sound so bad,” he pauses, he looks up into the sky and takes a deep breath before he looks back down at you, “I did it to see what you would do, I wanted to see if you would get jealous ‘cause sometimes I struggled to believe that you loved me – not that you ever gave me a reason to doubt you, it’s just, some things would just get into my head and I don’t know – you never got jealous, at least, it didn’t seem like you did. You would always be so calm, you rarely ever confronted me about it a-and I guess, I don’t know, I figured that you didn’t love me as much as I love you.”

You choose to ignore his last three words. You don’t know whether to scoff in disbelief or to laugh at his words. He must be joking, you think. But his face is serious and the look in his eyes is filled with nothing but honesty.

“Why would you think that?” 

He shrugs, “‘cause I knew how I felt when a guy looked at you a certain way o-or when someone flirted with you – I felt like shit. I got so fucking jealous and angry and it made me want to rip my hair out.” 

You can’t help but giggle at his words as you look at the seriousness in his face, “your beloved hair?” 

His eyes light up when he hears your laugh, a smile tugs at his lips, “yeah, I’d rip my hair out for you.”

You snort and shake your head as you look back down. He keeps staring at you for a moment before he speaks up again, “but what I’m trying to say is, seeing you with someone else broke my heart–”

“But I wasn’t with anyone else, I was with you and I wanted it to stay that way, Steve.”

“I know, I know,” he mumbles, “I was so insecure and a part of me thought that I was losing you and that hurt and I knew how much it would hurt if I actually lost you, if you left me for someone else – if you broke my heart.”

So he broke yours first.

“Do you remember the party at my place, back in august?”

“Yeah, I remember it.”

Steve clears his throat and you glance at him, a frown takes over his face. 

“After I saw you dance with Eddie last night, I remembered something.”

“What did you remember?” 

“We got into a fight at that party because of Billy. He was flirting with you.” 

Yeah, you remember that very well. You were dancing with your friends when Billy came up behind you, he grabbed your waist and before you could react, he pressed himself up against you. He whispered something in your ear and in that moment, Steve walked back into the room with a drink in his hand. He didn’t bother sticking around to see how you had pushed Billy away or how you slapped his cheek for touching you that way. 

You and Steve had gotten into a huge fight that night – one that left you both in tears. He was the one who slammed the door in your face when he pushed you out of his room after you got sick of arguing with each other. 

He stayed back in his room to calm down while you went downstairs and planned to go home when you bumped into Eddie. You didn’t realize that you had tears streaming down your face until he had asked you if you were okay. He pulled you into the kitchen, away from all the prying eyes. 

Eddie had given you a shoulder to lean on that night. He could have easily ignored you, you weren’t friends, not at that time, at least. But he didn’t, he was there for you. He helped you wipe your tears away, gave you something to drink and managed to cheer you up. 

“After we fought, I went downstairs to look for you, I wanted to apologize but then I saw you with him, with Eddie.”

You furrow your brows, “okay, and?”

“You were laughing with him like nothing ever happened, like we didn’t just get into a fight and I think that was the moment I figured that I wasn’t the one for you – ‘cause you were happy and smiling and I was fucking miserable and I couldn’t stand it so I drank until I passed out in the bathroom. I didn’t even remember that Eddie was the one you talked to when I woke up the next day, I just remembered seeing you with some guy.”

It would be a lie if you said that you aren’t shocked. You didn’t know how insecure he was. You always saw him as arrogant, confident and controlling. Not as insecure and scared. 

“And uh to get back to your question. Nancy, she’s just, I don’t know,” he trails off. 

Your heart begins to beat faster at the mention of her name. It takes you back to the night it all fell apart and to the day when he had confessed to you that he fell in love with her. You remember the pain, you remember all of it. 

“You promised me, you told me that you would love me forever.” 

“Did you really think that I meant that?”

“I didn’t, I-I’m not even sure if I ever loved you, y/n. I wouldn’t have fallen for her if I did love you, right?” 

You can already feel the tears coming, just the memory of it all hurts you. You are scared to hear him tell you why he fell in love with her. Why you weren’t enough for him.

Why is he so speechless? You wonder as you look at him. His brows are furrowed in concentration. 

Are there so many things that he loves about her that he doesn’t know where to start? 

While you prepare for another heartbreak, Steve tries to think of what made him believe that he could ever love someone else the way he loves you. He didn’t fall in love with her. He never fell out of love with you. You were always the one. It’s simple. 

But it’s not simple, because how can he explain any of this to you without sounding like a goddamn liar? 

How can he explain to you that he broke your heart because he was scared that you would break his first? 

How will he tell you that he only ever thought about you?

How can he look into your eyes and tell you that it made him feel sick to kiss her, to sleep with her and tell her that he loves her when all he ever wanted was you?

“Nancy, she just, she wanted me in the same way you did. My jealousy had gotten out of hand at that point and I was convinced that I was losing you so I uh, I convinced myself that I liked her too. That night at the Halloween party, I got drunk, blackout drunk. I thought it would be easier to break up with you that way.” 

His words will hurt you more than he will ever know. Just the thought of him planning to break up with you hurts so bad. While you were lying in bed thinking about him with nothing but love in your heart, he was thinking about leaving you.

And all of this because he was convinced that he was losing you? 

You never gave him a reason to think that. He had all your attention, your devotion, your love, your heart. He had it all. You gave him absolutely everything. You understand the insecurities and the jealousy and a part of you wants to believe his words but the other part can’t. 

He loves her. 

He changed for her not for you. 

And now that he has changed, he must feel guilty for the way he treated you, for the things he said to you, for the way he broke your heart. He wants to make things better, he wants to make it up to you, to take your pain away.

He said that he had to convince himself that he loved her, now he is doing the same with you. 

You are not angry at him, not anymore. 

You are just hurt and heartbroken. 

You love him and you always will. 

Suddenly, you feel numb when you realize that he is still with her. 

If he loves you then why is he still with her? 

It was easy for him to leave you.

“Y/n?” 

You hate this feeling. The numbness. You want it gone.

“Hey, y/n.” Steve says softly as he places his hand on your shoulder, pulling you out of your thoughts. 

You blink and halt in your tracks, you were so wrapped up in your mind, you didn’t even notice that you were already in front of your house.You look at his hand before you look up at him. His hazel eyes are filled with worry. 

“Are you okay?”

No. Of course you are not okay. 

Your attention strays away from him when you hear the loud music from the house down the street. Jimmy Davidson is home for the holidays, his parents are gone this weekend, he already invited you to his ‘pre christmas party’. 

An idea crosses your mind, you will probably come to regret it but right now, you don’t care.

“Hey, do you remember Jimmy, you know that super intimidating looking guy who’s actually really nice?” 

Steve looks confused, his eyebrows are drawn together and he tilts his head at your question. 

“Uh yeah, he was on the football team– why are we talking about him again?”

You hold your hand up and point your finger into the direction of his house, “he’s throwing a party, do you wanna go?”

He looks taken aback and still confused. You want to go to a party with him?

“I need a drink,” you mumble, “or two.” 

Steve doesn’t know if that is a good idea and he doesn’t understand how you went from hating him to wanting a conversation with him to wanting to party with him but it’s not like he would say no to you. He will take any opportunity to spend time with you these days. 

He looks down at you. You are waiting for him to say something. You have that look in your eyes that he always loved so much, the one you gave him when you wanted something.

“Yeah, let’s go.” 

He wishes he could see the smile that you used to give him but instead he gets a nod before you turn around. He follows you, suddenly feeling the giddiness that he hasn’t felt in a long time. He is excited to spend time with you. 

Two nights ago, he got drunk at a bar, thinking that he lost you forever. Now you are walking down the street together, your hand brushes against his and he fights the urge to just grab it. 

While Steve feels hopeful, thinking that this could lead to a second chance. You feel sad because you know that this will be the last time. 

You keep telling yourself that you have let go of him but you haven’t fully let go. You don’t just miss him as your boyfriend, you also miss him as your friend.

The music in Jimmy’s house is loud, you are surprised that the cops haven’t been called yet. The smell of liquor is strong. The hallway is crowded with groups of teenagers, you take a peek into the living room, it’s even more crowded. Jimmy kept his popularity going, even after leaving Hawkins for college. 

You and Steve take your jackets off, he takes yours from your hand and hangs it up on the rack. You pull at your sleeves and step closer to him without realizing it. 

“Yo, y/n!” 

You turn your head to see Jimmy walking towards you and Steve, a red solo cup is in his hand. You can’t help but laugh when you see the ugly Christmas sweater and the Santa hat that he is wearing. He really stuck to the theme. 

His eyes flash with surprise when he sees Steve. 

“Harrington! Long time no see, man! How’s it going?” He asks and greets him with a handshake. 

Steve smiles, “hey man.”

“I didn’t know you were still together,” he says as he points between the two of you. 

“Oh, we aren’t–”

“Jimmy! Let’s go, man!” Some guy yells, waving him over, “I’m losing here!” He throws his hands up as he holds the ping pong in his hand. 

“I’m coming!” Jimmy yells back causing you to cringe at the volume of his voice. He turns back to you, “get yourself some drinks, guys. We’ll catch up later!” He says to Steve before he looks at you and winks, “don’t have too much fun, lovebirds.”

Steve scratches the back of his neck while you roll your eyes. 

You look at each other awkwardly at first but when another guy with a similar Christmas sweater as Jimmy walks past you, you can’t help but laugh as you share a glance. 

You make your way into the kitchen. Steve follows close behind. You both notice the few curious glances that get thrown your way. You don’t recognize many people but there are definitely a few from Hawkins High around. You just hope that Heather and Chrissy aren’t here tonight. 

Steve places his hand on the small of your back when you both walk into the kitchen. Your eyes land on the bottle on the counter, you instantly reach for the tequila bottle but before you can even think about pouring it into one of the small solo cups, Steve grabs your hand, stopping you. 

Furrowing your brows, you look up at him. 

“Are you sure about this?” He asks. 

“Yeah,” you mumble, “we can just, I don’t know, we can just forget everything for tonight.”

Steve is surprised to hear these words coming from your mouth. 

“We can just have fun, just like old times, when we were friends.”

He can hear the shakiness in your voice, he can see the vulnerability in your eyes that you have been hiding all this time. You were pretending to be okay after the breakup, you gave him the cold shoulder and acted like you moved on but you never did, he realized that after he tried to kiss you. 

You never moved on and you are not as strong as you pretend to be. You are breaking a little more, everyday. 

Just one last time. You think to yourself as you look into his eyes. 

He nods, “yeah, okay.” 

He reaches for the bottle in your hand, he grabs the cups and fills them with tequila. You both down the liquid in one go, cringing at the strong taste. Steve wipes his mouth, “god, that’s disgusting,” he mumbles. 

You nod in agreement but reach for the bottle nonetheless, ignoring his disapproving look when you fill the cups again. 

“You should take it slow–”

You shake your head, “no, I wanna get drunk.”

“Jesus,” he mumbles, knowing that you want to get rid of this awkwardness between the two of you by getting alcohol into your system. “Okay.” This isn’t a good idea, he knows it isn’t. This will only complicate things even more, yet he joins you and downs the second one as well. 

You look into his eyes, it’s something you have always avoided since the breakup but now you look at him, you truly look at him and you get lost in his eyes. You feel the ache in your chest, the one that will never fade away.

You will never know how much he regrets it, how guilty he feels when he sees the pain in your eyes, the love that is still there. How could he be so stupid? How could he ever think that you would hurt him?

If he could turn back time, this would have never happened. 

He could’ve pulled you into his arms right now, he would’ve kissed you and told you that he loves you. 

You look down and lick your lips, you place the cup on the counter. 

The house is filled with people, you hear different voices, laughter and loud music. You notice the stares and the curious glances. You feel someone brushing past you. Yet, it’s just you and him, right now. 

“Come on,” he says as he holds his hand out for you, “let’s dance, like old times, right?”

You stare at his hand for a long moment before you decide to take it. 

You don’t know how happy he is to feel your touch. 

He doesn’t know how painful it is to you. 

He leads you out of the kitchen, keeping a tight grip on your hand. He greets a few people from school, waving and smiling at some guys. You are just focused on his touch and the way it’s making you feel. 

The way it makes your heartbeat speed up and the way it makes it hurt so horribly at the same time. 

“Hey Steve, y/n!” 

You both turn around, a guy from the basketball team is waving at you, “wanna play beer pong?” 

Steve looks down at you and you shrug, “sure.” 

It seems as though this night is full of bad ideas. First, you ended up on his doorsteps after telling him to leave you alone, then, you asked him to go to a party with you and now you are about to get plastered with the guy you shouldn’t even look at anymore. 

But if there is anything that will kill this awkward tension between you two then it’s a game of beer pong and the two drunk jocks with the Santa hats. 

The dining room is filled with people, just like the rest of the house. It smells like weed and beer in here – you could use some weed right now. 

“Are you okay?” Steve asks as he leans closer. The smell of his cologne drives you insane. 

He scans your face, he looks into your eyes and eyes the line between your eyebrows, he notes the tension, he wants to take it away so bad. A strand of hair falls in front of your face and before he can stop himself, he reaches out to tuck it behind your ear. You don’t move away, not this time. 

You feel so stupid, so weak and pathetic for savoring the touch of the man who hurt you so badly.

The tension, the bad thoughts and the worries leave your mind after winning the first round of beer pong. 

A few drinks in and all your sadness and the heartbreak is forgotten, temporarily. 

Both of you forget everything.

Tonight, it’s just the two of you. 

You both get drunker and drunker and more comfortable with each other with each round you win.

By the time you actually make it to the dance floor, you are both wasted. Stumbling and bumping into each other. Though you still keep the distance between you two. Your hands brush against each other and he ends up taking the risk and hooking his pinky around yours which you don’t seem to mind. 

Steve feels the urge to do more, to wrap his arms around you and hold you. His heart longs for you, all of him longs for you. He gets so lost in your eyes, in you. He doesn’t notice anything around him, he only sees you. 

You joke around like you used to, you hold onto each other like you used to, you smile and laugh and for the first time in a long time, you are both happy. 

And of course, Billy Hargrove is the one who sees you two together. He smirks when he sees the way Steve looks at you, when he notices his hand sliding down your body, stopping just on the small of your back to pull you closer and to his surprise, you don’t even seem to mind. You must be drunk or on drugs, Billy thinks. There is no way you would let him touch you that way otherwise. 

“Well, well, well.” 

Billy raises his brows and glances down at the redhead by his side.

“Looks like the queen and king are back together.” 

“Oh no, he is still with Nancy. They're sneaking around,” Tommy says as he leans against the wall next to him. 

“Well what do they say about cheaters?” Carol smirks as she looks at the way Steve leans closer to you to whisper something in your ear. 

“Once a cheater, always a cheater,” Tommy chuckles. 

Billy takes a sip of his beer and shakes his head, “I thought she’s smarter than that.”

Carol and Tommy laugh at his words, “what’d you expect? She was always in love with him.”

“Yeah, poor little thing always followed him around like some lost puppy,” Carol mocks, twirling her hair with her finger. “I wish Nancy was here so she could see this,” she smirks as she watches Steve lead you away. 

Steve plops down on the sofa and pulls you down with him. You lean your shoulder against his. Your head is spinning and your mouth feels dry. 

“I haven’t had this much fun in a long time,” Steve says, he looks down at you. A fond expression takes over his face. Your hair is messy and your pupils are blown, you are breathing heavily, a small smile is pulling at your lips when you tilt your head to meet his eyes. 

“Me neither.”

Steve smiles at you. His hand brushes against yours, the feeling of your skin against his makes his heart flutter in his chest. When he goes to wrap his hand around yours, to intertwine his fingers with yours, you seem to snap out of your trance. You break eye contact and cough as you straighten up. 

Something about the way he looked at you made you sober up a little. 

“I-I’m gonna go drink some water,” you mutter and push yourself up, “do you want something?” 

He shakes his head.

He knows better than to follow you, he knows when you need space and right now, you need it, even if just for a moment. He watches you walk away, smiling when you look over your shoulder to glance at him. 

He leans back against the soft cushions and looks around the crowded room. Right now, he feels content. You were an unexpected surprise this evening and he can’t help but bask in the feeling of being with you again. 

Three nights ago, he thought he lost you forever but here you are, back with him. 

Though he can’t shake the feeling that something is off about this night, he chooses to ignore it, not wanting to ruin it sooner than necessary.

A few minutes pass and there is no sight of you, he runs his fingers through his messy hair. He leans his elbows on his knees and looks around. He stares at the doorway, waiting for you to come through but you don’t. 

He gets up and his stomach churns a little. He definitely drank way too much. 

He pushes past a group of drunken boys and steps into the crowded hallway. A couple is making out against the wall, a girl is crying to her friends, a group of jocks are sitting on the stairs, laughing loudly. 

He walks into the kitchen, the sight he is met with makes him freeze on the spot. You are standing with your back pressed against the kitchen island, a guy is towering over you. He is much taller than you, his shoulders are broad, it’s clear that he is working out. 

His first reaction is to tense up and clench his jaw in anger. The sight of him smirking down at you makes his blood boil. 

He sobers up quickly when he notices how tense you are, how your hands grip the counter tightly as you press yourself further against the counter to get away from him. You are uncomfortable and flinch away when he reaches out to touch your face.

All the jealousy fades away and anger takes over instead. He doesn’t hesitate to walk over and push the guy away from you. Your eyes are wide and filled with fear, you look at Steve and he instantly grabs your hand and pushes you behind him. 

“Stay away from my girl.” He spits without even thinking. 

The guy looks startled at first but he quickly relaxes and laughs. He looks Steve up and down before his attention goes back to you. 

“Shit, I didn’t know she had a boyfriend.”

Steve can feel how scared you are, you grip his hand tightly with your shaky one and it only makes his anger worse.

“Even if she didn’t, you had no right to touch her like that, you fucking asshole.”

Your heartbeat picks up, fear rushes through you. You always hated when he got into fights. 

The guy still looks at you, he eyes you up and down and it makes you shudder. It’s not the first time he’d done it. 

“Steve.” 

Steve is glaring at the guy in front of him, the urge to throw a punch is strong – a few months ago, he would’ve done it but protecting you and making sure that you feel comfortable is more important to him now. 

“Sorry man, won’t happen again” he says but there is clearly no meaning behind his words, he chuckles and gives you both a mocking smile before he turns around to leave.

Steve takes a step forward to follow him but you pull him back, “please don’t.” You hold his hand even tighter and step in front of him.You are sober now and so is he. The night is over, almost. His hazel eyes are darker than usual, he looks mad. “Can we just go, please? I wanna go home.”

Your words and the panicked look on your face take him back to the night at the Halloween party – the way you begged for him to go home with you not knowing that moments later, he would break your heart. 

You wear that same look on your face you did that night. 

His eyes soften and his shoulders slump. He is not ready for this night to end but he nods. “Yeah, let’s go.”

He keeps on holding your hand and you don’t fight him. Your hand is still shaky. You are nervous and scared. 

He only lets your hand go to help you put on your coat. You open the door and step out with your hands tucked in your pockets. His face falls a little but he doesn’t say anything. He follows you out and puts his jacket on once he’s outside. He shuts the door and just like that, it’s all back to the way it was before. 

But he doesn’t want it. He doesn’t want things to go back to the way they were before. He wants to keep you but he feels you slipping through his fingers just like you felt him slipping through your fingers, two months ago. 

The snow is falling quietly and as you get further away from the party, you can hear the music less and less, only the silence of the night and your footsteps are heard. 

“Are you okay?” 

“What?”

“Are you okay after what happened in there?” He asks, “h-he didn’t do worse did he?”

“Oh,” you whisper and shake your head, “no – I mean, yes I’m okay and no, he didn’t do worse. I’m kinda used to it, it’s not the first time he did this.” 

“Wait what?” He asks as the anger comes rushing back in. 

You shrug, a sour expression appears on your face, “I mean, I haven’t seen him since Heather’s party back in september–”

“Back in– what? Y/n, that’s when we were still together! Why didn’t you tell me?” 

“I didn’t think you’d care,” you mumble, “you were always focused on those girls and picking fights about stuff that wasn’t real so..”

He feels a flash of irritation and anger but also guilt and sadness. He made you think that he didn’t care about your safety and your wellbeing. 

“Of course, I’d care.”

He hates the shift of energy between you two. He wants to go back to the party, he wants to live inside that bubble again, the one where you still like him. 

“I’m so sorry, y/n.” He whispers knowing that you might not want to hear his apology. “I failed you, I failed us.” He thinks about his mother’s words, how she told him to fight for you and he wants to so bad but he doesn’t know how. 

You stop in front of your house, the moment you have been dreading all night is finally here. 

“It’s okay, Steve,” you whisper, “I’m not angry at you anymore.”

You look at the way his expression changes. 

“You’re not?”

By the tone of his voice, you know that he thinks that this must be a good sign. 

You shake your head. The bile thickens in your throat and you already feel sick.

“No, I’m not.”

You are calm, your voice is soft and quiet and the look in your eyes makes him nervous. He stays silent for a moment. You stand beneath the night sky, the snow is falling and it reminds him of the night you have kissed for the first time, right here. 

“I-I understand it now.”

He doesn’t know why but he can feel the fear rushing through him, that pit growing in his stomach. 

“What do you understand?”

“Everything,” you whisper, “I wanted the truth and the other day you said that you weren't honest with me back then but you were. You really did leave me because you fell in love with her just like you had told me back then.”

He frowns at your words, he steps closer to you and he shakes his head. 

Your eyes well up with tears, your bottom lip begins to quiver. 

“And I-I think that you really love her because you wouldn’t have left me if you didn’t – no matter how scared you are, you don’t leave the person that you love for someone else, you don’t hurt the person you love. You would rather have your heart broken than break their heart,” you say as tears stream down your cheeks, “it was so easy for you to leave me but you can’t leave her, you are still with her because you can’t and you don't want to break her heart so that must mean something."

He shakes his head, “no,” he whispers.

“It’s okay, Steve,” you whisper, brokenly. You look down and the tears slip from your face and down into the snow, “you changed a-and I can tell that you are trying to do better and that you want to make it up to me b-but I don’t want it, I don’t want you to think that you owe me anything. I-I just want you to know that it’s okay. You don’t have to feel bad or guilty.”

He shakes his head again but he can’t form any words. His heart is racing in his chest, the fear is holding him tightly. His vision blurs, he can’t stand to see you cry. 

“I love you, Steve and I think that I always will but we have to let each other go.”

His eyes widen with panic and he finally snaps out of it, he cups your cheeks and pulls you closer, “I love you too, y/n! I love you. I will leave her, I will!”

You shake your head, you raise your hands and grab his wrists as you look into his eyes. 

You are both crying and it hurts so bad. It feels like your heart is being ripped apart.

“She is the one for you. You should be with her. I want you to be happy, even if it’s not with me.”

Steve wants to say that you make him happy, that you are the one for him, that you are the one he loves but his words are strangled in his throat. Tears roll down his cheeks and his chest aches. He can see the pain in your eyes and the way you are suffering because of him.

He shakes his head, he is shaking, he is on the verge of breaking down, of falling to his knees and begging for a second chance. He leans his forehead against yours. He whispers your name so brokenly it makes you cry even harder. 

“It’s okay, Steve,” you whisper and cup his cheeks, “I promise, it’s okay.”

He feels the warmth of your touch and the sound of your voice that makes his heart ache. He doesn’t want this to end, he doesn’t want to let you go, he doesn’t want to lose you. 

“You can let me go, it’s okay. You don’t have to feel bad anymore.” 

Steve feels like his chest is being ripped open, like his heart is getting torn out of his body. 

You wrap your arms around him and lay your head on his chest, wanting to feel the warmth of his body, one last time. He doesn’t hesitate to pull you even tighter against him. He holds onto you for dear life, he buries his face in your neck, he breathes in your sweet scent. 

Your broken heart is breaking more and more. 

You close your eyes and you let yourself feel him, one last time. 

You wish you wouldn’t have to do this. 

You wish you could live in a world where he loves you, where you wouldn’t have to say goodbye. 

You thought that it couldn’t get any worse after he dumped you and after he tried to kiss you but this is so much worse. 

This is goodbye.

You stand beneath the falling snow just this time, he won’t pull you in for a first kiss, he won’t make you smile, he won’t pull you back for one more kiss before you walk into your house but he pulls you in for another hug when you try to walk away from him and this time, he holds you even tighter. 

He wants to fight for you but how can he when you don’t want him to?

It hurts to hear him cry and it hurts to feel him hold you so tightly and it will hurt even more when you will see him with her again. 

As much as it hurts, as much as you don’t want it, as wrong as it feels – you step away from him and you look at him, one last time. You can’t stand the tears that run down his cheeks. His large sad eyes will haunt you for the rest of your life. 

You step away from him and it makes him cry even harder. 

You have to go. 

You need to go. 

“Goodbye, Steve.”

He looks crestfallen and broken and it takes everything in you to turn away from him. You clutch your chest and walk away. You can hear his sniffles and before your heart can convince you to turn back around, you unlock the door and step inside. You shut it and press your back against the door. Finally, you let the sob break free as you fall to the ground. You bury your face in your hands and you cry, once again. 

Now it’s truly over. 

It’s all over and you don't even know that you are the one who is still holding his heart.

That you will always be the one.

next chapter

-

tagging friends & mutuals

@mysticmunson @wroteclassicaly @corrodedseraphine @corrodedcorpses @screammunson @hellfire--cult @taintedcigs @imjuststeddietrashatthispoint @take-everything-you-can @sherrylyn628 @somethingvicked @nemesis729

[thelostmagicians]

Booksmart | Steve Harrington

Summary: Steve Harrington’s head may be full of air, but his heart is full of love. [4.4k]

Fluff, comfort, slight angst, insecure Steve

♡

Steve Harrington isn’t a genius. He barely passed his classes in high school, couldn’t get into college, and can barely keep his minimum wage job. He’s been belittled by his parents too many times to care about their opinion and he knows compared to his friends he isn’t as clever or witty, but he’s okay with it - at least he thinks he is. It might sting when Robin and Eddie tease him for being too slow or when Dustin sighs in frustration because he can’t keep up, but the ache dissipates when they look at him in adoration. 

He blames his failing love life on his lack of intelligence. Although girls find his himbo-ness endearing, his relationships never last long.  Most of the dates he goes on end up as dirty hookups in the backseat of his car and on the off chance a girl stays longer than a month he can slowly see the irritation replace the endearment in her eyes. He was just something to do during the inbetween phase of graduation and moving out of Hawkins, a trophy to conquer - to finally have slept with the previously known King. He used to be okay with that at the beginning, he got his needs met while girls crossed him off their list, but over time he craved more. He saw how Nancy looked at Jonathan, how Joyce laughed with Hopper, and how Robin blushed around Vickie. He was desperate for that feeling of being wanted and loved. 

Even though he's surrounded by people who love and accept him as he is, he can't help but wonder if things would’ve been different if he was just a little smarter. 

_

“Robin I’m telling you she started speaking a different language halfway through dinner,” Steve grumbles as he’s shelving the horror section. 

Robin rolls her eyes at him, “Just because you don’t understand the words she’s using doesn’t mean she was speaking a different language, Steven. I don’t even think she knows anything but English. 

Steve sighs under his breath. 

He had gone on another date last night, but didn’t even make it past the appetizers before he made up an emergency and left. The night started off great, the Indiana summer evening had a cool breeze, he opened the door for her, and was rewarded with a kiss on his cheek when he presented her with  flowers. Valerie had been nice, beautiful, and smart - maybe a little too smart for Steve. Don’t get him wrong, Steve loves strong, smart, and capable women. He loved hearing Valerie speak about physics and graphing linear equations, he loved learning about what interested her, but as the night went on he could see the light in her eyes fading as he kept asking her questions. The final straw had been when he told her he hasn’t read a book since high school and she laughed lightly before saying “you really are only a pretty face.” 

“Maybe, I’m just destined to be alone, or like a back up plan for girls who come back to Hawkins after giving up on their big city dreams.”

Robin sighs and gives him a reassuring pat, “Steve, you’re a good man. You’ll find your one, trust me on this.”

Before he can say more the bell jingles as a gust of hot air is let in. Steve groans as he spots Dustin’s mop of curly hair and hears the chatter of 6 other teens. He holds the door open with his arm as he sees Lucas struggling with Max’s wheelchair. 

“You guys can’t keep coming in here, Robin and I actually have work to do you know.”

“We wanted to pick a movie for movie night,” Max says. 

He sighs softly as he meets her eyes. Steve’s always had a soft spot for Max ever since they’ve met and it’s only gotten softer since then, everyone knows this, but the kids tend to take advantage of this and use Max to get their way. 

“Alright two movies max and no rated r ones.”

As he hears the bell jingle again he starts his greeting in a monotone voice, “Welcome to Family Video, my name is St—” he chokes. 

“Oh my god, are you okay?” you ask softly. 

He’s still coughing and panting slightly as he tries to give you a reassuring nod. Robin makes her way to the front to hand Steve some water and finish introductions. 

“What he means to say is his name is Steve and I’m Robin. You can come get us if you have any questions.”

You nod politely, finally tearing your gaze away from Steve as you start browsing through the racks. Steve, however, can’t seem to stop looking at you. He’s seen a lot of beautiful women in his life, but none of them held a candle to you. Everything about you was just perfect to him and he didn’t even know you yet. His eyes repeatedly traced the slope of your nose, down to your plush lips, and back to your furrowed eyebrows as you read the back of a tape. 

You lift your head up and he blushes as you make eye contact. 

“Do you have any recommendations for sci-fi, I just moved to town and need something to keep me from getting bored?” you ask shyly. 

“Err- We have a sci-fi section over there” Steve points to the rack behind him where the kids are gathered and quietly arguing over which movie to pick. 

You speak as you make your way over, “Yeah, but do you have any recommendations for me? I feel like I’ve seen all the good ones already.”

Steve's face falls as he tries to come up with an answer. 

“Have you seen Star Wars?” Dustin speaks up

Max and El groan loudly as you shake your head. 

“I tend to stay away from franchises, but what’s it about?”

Before Dustin can answer, Mike beats him to it, “It’s about galactic adventures of these characters, it’s pretty cool.”

“We were planning on watching it tonight, we always have movie nights at Steve’s on Friday. You should join us!” Dustin exclaims as he tries to shoot Steve a sly wink. 

Your eyes grow wide at the sudden invitation as Steve rests his head in his hands too embarrassed to speak. 

“Is that alright with you, Steve?” You ask kindly. 

Steve’s breath hitches as he hears you say his name, he slowly meets your gaze as he gives you a slight nod trying to avoid choking on air again.

Robin smirks at Steve as she hands you a post-it, “Here’s Steve’s address. Movie starts at 7 and bring as many snacks as you’d like!”

You grab the post-it and shoot everyone a small wave “I’ll see you guys then!”

Steve feels like he can finally breathe after he hears the soft slam of the door behind you. 

_

“I can’t believe you would do that, just invite a stranger to my home like that,” Steve groans as he fixes his hair, again, in the hallway mirror. He glances down at his polo debating if he should change his shirt for the fourth time. 

“Steve, she agreed to come while seeing you in a Family Video vest, I don’t think your outfit is what you should be worried about,” Jonathan teases him as he passes him a coke. 

Steve shoots him a sarcastic smile before checking his watch. It’s 7:02, you should’ve shown up 2 minutes ago and he’s a nervous wreck. He sees your headlights before anyone else does and trips over Will’s backpack as he waits to open the door on the very first knock. 

“Sorry I’m late, the petit fours took longer than expected.” You smile at him holding out a large container filled with small cakes. 

He gives you a confused look too embarrassed to ask what petit fours are, so instead he takes the container and waves you in. 

“What brings you to Hawkins?” Eddie asks.

“I actually came here for work, Hawkins laboratory needed another scientist to look at all the crazy stuff that’s happened here.”

Everyone basks in the uncomfortable silence as you mention the lab before Nancy speaks up, “You work as a scientist? You seem pretty young.”

You hesitate slightly, folding your hands in your lap, “I am young, but I graduated college at 16 and recently got my PhD and my advisor recommended me for this job, so here I am.”

Steve’s heart falls to his stomach, you were a genius, a child prodigy of some sort and you’ve accomplished so much at such a young age. There was no way you would even be slightly interested in him, but part of him was willing to take that risk - be okay with whatever you spared him because it was better than not having you in his life at all. 

The movie is ignored as everyone pays more attention to you and your genius-ness. He hears voices all at once but all he can focus on is yours. The way your laugh ends in a higher pitch than it starts in, the way you softly reassure Nancy that college isn’t hard, but his favorite is when you say his name when you ask for his opinion on the theories the kids present to you. It makes him feel important like you care about what he has to say and you value his thoughts just as much as you would anyone else’s. 

Steve might’ve only met you today, but he was already enamored. You might’ve knowingly opened the door only to Family Video, but you also unknowingly opened the door to his heart and started to fill every corner of it with you. 

_

Steve doesn’t think he’s read this much in his entire existence as he has this month.

The first thing he did the morning after movie night was go to the library and check out as many books as he could about everything that sounded smart. He’s inhaled almost every book on poetry (specifically Shakespeare), astrophysics and European history. You’ve come to every movie night since the first one and you try your best to visit Family Video after work just to chat with Steve and Robin. He was slowly falling in love with you and he wasn’t going to let his dumb brain be the reason he lost you. He forcefully read every book from cover to cover, prying his eyes open with the memory of your impressed smile anytime he fell asleep. He’s made countless flashcards and pesters Robin to quiz them during their shift. 

After two months of revising and memorizing he thinks he finally finds the courage to ask you out. You’re the last one to leave tonight, helping Steve clean up after everyone either left or claimed a spare room. 

Steve’s hands are clammy as he ties the trash bag into a pretty bow, “I was wondering if… I mean you don’t have to… but umm, like if you wanted to go out. With me, I mean.”

Your eyes trace his face as you clench the empty red vines wrapper, “You mean like a date?”

Steve nods, unsure of your reaction. Part of him hopes you’ll say no and put him out of his misery, so he can finally stop learning, but a bigger part of him hopes you’ll give him a chance. 

Your lips upturn in a shy smile as you fiddle your thumbs, “Yeah, I’d like that a lot. What did you have in mind?”

“How about next Friday, we ditch the losers and have our movie night? I’ll pick you up at 7 and we can catch a movie?”

You respond with a quick kiss on his cheek as you grab your purse and head out. Steve rests his head on the back of the door as he pumps his fist in the air and tries his hardest to not  wake Robin and Eddie with his cheering. 

_

You’re nervous as you pace in front of your door. Steve makes you nervous, but you don’t hate the feeling. You’ve never felt this way about a boy before, boys always had a competition with you, a majority of your dates ended up with the two of you trying to up each other with accomplishments, but with Steve everything is different. Even though the facts he tells are wrong, it was still endearing to watch him try. 

You’re broken out of your thoughts with a knock on your door. You smooth down your dress and look in the mirror once more before swinging the door open. Steve stands there in all his glory, hair perfectly done, snug jeans, and a bouquet of flowers covering his stupidly handsome face. 

“These are for you,” he pushes the bouquet towards you with a surprise force that you have to step back to avoid them pressing into your nose. 

“Thanks Steve, they’re beautiful.” You set them down gently at the nearby table mentally making a note to find a vase after you come back home. 

He opens his car door for you, waiting until you’re settled in before jogging back to his side. “There’s a French movie playing tonight, I think it’s about Marie - Annette, you know the queen who liked cake?” 

You giggle quietly but opt to ignore his mistake because he just looked too fucking cute with furrowed eyebrows and a nervous smile. 

“And after the movie I was thinking we can stop by somewhere for a late night snack?”

You nod excitedly eager to finally spend time with him far away from the eyes of your prying friends, “I didn’t know you knew French?”

“Uh, yeah.”

The movie was… boring and bland. Steve didn’t understand anything happening so instead spent the entire time admiring you, the furrow of your eyebrows, the tilt of your head, and the gentle bite of your lip. He remembered you mentioning to Robin that you were fluent in French, so thought a foreign film would be a good idea for a first date, but now he regrets his choice especially since you spent the drive to the diner asking him questions about the movie. Questions he didn’t know the answer to. Steve has charmed his way through life, but he wasn’t sure how much longer his charm would last with you, he had an inkling that sooner or later you would be able to see through his facade and you would see him as a disappointment.

_

You had a hunch that Steve was lying about knowing French and your hunch was confirmed when his shoulders tensed as the ticket guy told him the movie didn’t have English subtitles. He played it off with a laugh and a wave of his hand, but you could tell it made him nervous. You thought the movie was alright, but your favorite part was feeling Steve’s eyes on you. You try to be mindful when asking him questions, keeping them vague and more about opinions rather than asking him questions that have a right or wrong answer. He responds as vaguely as possible, gauging your reaction to see if you’re pleased with his answer or if he needs to backtrack and fix his opinion. 

Your conversation at the diner starts to get more personal as you ask each other about your likes and dislikes. You learn that Steve broke his arm learning to ride a bike, his favorite color is green, and he’s always wanted a dog. Everything you learn about Steve just makes you like him even more and the potential of falling in love with him makes you giddy with happiness. Your hands brush occasionally as you walk back to his car. He bites his lip hesitating to grab your hand as he peeks at you from the corner of his eye. You make the decision for the both of you and take a hold of his hand swinging both your arms as he blushes. 

“You’re really cute Steve Harrington,” you say as you force him to face you before gently pushing your lips to his. 

_

You spend every free time you have with Steve now. It’s been a month since your first date and since then you’ve gone out plenty of times and if you’re not physically together then you’re talking for hours on the phone. Steve’s able to open up to you more than he has to anyone else and it’s only been a few months of knowing you but he knows he’s in love, yet he can’t ask you to be his girlfriend. He does everything a boyfriend should do, calling you during breaks, kissing your bad days away, and hugging you just right when you’re on the verge of tears, but he still can’t find the courage to ask you to be his, officially. 

You express your concern to Nancy and Robin at an impromptu girls night, thrown together after a rough week for all of you. 

“I just don’t know why he won’t ask me, I always want to ask him myself before I see him, but then I lose my nerve. Maybe he doesn’t even like me like that and I’m just reading into things,” you whine as you smear a homemade face mask on Robin's face. 

“Trust me, Steve is a goner for you,” Nancy replies as she squints to make sure her brushes on the nail polish perfectly. 

“Nance is right, Steve is in love with you, but you just make him nervous.”

“I don’t understand why though, how do I make him nervous when he’s Steve Harrington,” you sigh dreamily. 

Nancy and Robin giggle as they see the childish frown on your face. You push your face into a pillow whining into it like a petulant child. 

Nancy rubs your back gently, “Look it’s not my place to say, but Steve isn’t the smartest tool academically. And you’re this child prodigy and that makes him nervous.”

Robin nods in agreement, “Yeah, you do know he spent months reading all sorts of books just to impress you right? He isn’t actually as smart as he pretends to be. He just memorizes a bunch of stuff the days leading up to your date.”

You huff in annoyance, “Yeah, I knew that on our first date when he took me to that French film. But I don’t love him because he can tell me facts about the mesozoic era. I love him because he’s him.”

Nancy and Robin share a knowing look.

“You love him?” Robin whispers.

“What?”

“You just said you love him,” Nancy clarifies.

You breathe in deeply before letting it out, the weight of what you said finally sinking in. “Yeah, I do. I really do.”

Both girls squeal as they pull you into a hug, face masks and nail polish quickly forgotten. 

You fall asleep that night knowing the next time you see Steve you’ll tell him. Tell him how much you love him and how he means to you.

_

Unfortunately for you and Steve, you aren’t able to spend any time alone lately. Work is crazy for the both of you and any time you have off it’s spent with the group. While you love spending time with your friends, you’re dying for a second alone with Steve. A second that only you both can cherish when you finally tell him how you feel. 

You’re hoping you can finally catch a moment alone with Steve at the summer bonfire by Lover’s Lake. Almost every young adult in Hawkins comes out of hiding for this annual bonfire, usually thrown by college kids as a final hurrah before summer break is officially over. You hung out with Nancy and Robin for a while and meet some new people, but you’re aren’t able to find the one person you want to see. You finally spot him parking his car and hurriedly shoving his family video vest in the trunk, but before you call out to him you’re blocked by a freckled boy wearing a smug smile. 

“Well if it isn’t the new genius of Hawkins,” the boy teases, voice filled with malice.

You smile politely, “I’m sorry you’re–”

“I’m Hagan. Tommy Hagan, surprised Steve hasn’t mentioned me considering we used to be the best of friends before he became a loser.”

You’ve heard about Tommy, mostly through passing from Nancy and Jonathan and based on Steve’s disgruntled face every time his name was mentioned, you decided Tommy Hagan wasn’t worth your time. 

“How can I help you?” You ask in a monotone voice to show how disinterested you are. 

Before Tommy can start you feel a pair of arms wrap around your waist and lips brush against the side of your head. You turn to see Steve’s grimace at Tommy before his eyes soften landing on you. 

“Hi hon,” he whispers gently, his left arm moving from caressing your hip to soothing the ache in your shoulder. 

“Hey baby.” For a second it’s just the two of you lost in each other’s eyes, you wonder if everyone else can see how lovesick you are for Steve. Before you can whisk him away for yourself Tommy interrupts again.

“Damn, Harrington. Didn’t think I’d see you go all soft again after what Wheeler did to you.”

You rolled your eyes at the mention of Nancy. It’s been years, both Steve and Nancy were over it, being happy for each other and supporting each other as friends. Yet everyone still brought it up because they had no other dirt on Steve. 

“Didn’t know you were home for the summer Tommy,” Steve replies ready to end the conversation with his former friend. 

At this point you see Jonathan and Eddie glancing from their spot near the fire. Both of them looking at Steve, silently asking him if he needed them. Steve shakes his head at them and squeezes your shoulder readying to lead you away. 

“Yeah, summer is the only time I have off now. Between college and my internship. It’s hard out there man, but you wouldn’t know that, would you?” Tommy smirks knowingly as he pushes Steve’s buttons. He knows college has always been a sore spot for Steve especially since he was still stuck working at Family Video. 

Steve grunts in response hoping his disinterest is enough to stray Tommy away from the both of you, but with Steve’s luck Tommy turns his attention to you. 

“Surprised he can keep up with a genius like you sweetheart.”

You wrinkled your nose in disgust, the term of endearment turning sour coming from a mouth other than Steve’s.

Tommy continues to go on, swaying from the few too many drinks he’s had. “Did he tell you he barely passed high school? His dad complained to mine about how much of a disappointment he turned out to be. Can’t even get a job at his dad’s firm with the brain he has.”

Steve loosens his grip around your shoulder, cheeks flushing in embarrassment. 

“You’re telling me your girl hasn’t caught on to the kind of screw up you are Harrington? You sure she’s a genius, or maybe you found someone that aligns with your IQ.”

At this point everyone is watching the words fly out of Tommy’s mouth, some snickering others shooting Steve looks of pity. Tommy Hagan is ripping him to shreds in front of everyone and yet all he can focus on is you. A look of disappointment mixed with frustration glazing over your otherwise sweet disposition. He sees his friends pushing their way through the crowd but before they could defend him he hears your honey like voice calling out for Tommy. 

“What university did you say you go to, Tommy?” you ask sweetly.

“Indiana University of Business,” he smirks behind his beer.

“And I’m assuming your daddy paid for it? Cause you sure as hell didn’t get into school by your merit, considering you spent most of high school with your head so far up people’s asses that you couldn’t get enough oxygen to your brain. Hence, why you and your stupid ass are still playing into high school politics at your grown ass age.”

The smugness on Tommy’s face disappears. 

“And what do you want to do with your future Tommy? Join daddy’s business? Turn out exactly like him? Cause last I heard he spends more time with his new family than he does with you. Maybe he finally got a child he actually loves.”

You knew it was a low blow, bringing up Tommy’s family issues, but you couldn’t care less. After everything he said to Steve, he had it coming and you only wish you were around in high school so you could’ve put him in his place earlier. 

You heard a low whistle from Eddie, “Well guess the shows over folks. And looks like we have a clear winner.”

People start clearing out going back to mind their own business and you grab Steve’s arm leading him far away from Tommy’s frozen stance. 

“Guess the secret’s out,” Steve mumbles.

“Huh?”

“Now you know I’m not really smart, so..” he trails off.

You smile, arms twisting around his waist pulling him close. “You know, I’ve met a lot of smart people in my life, but don't you dare, even for a second take Tommy’s words to heart. Because I know you, and I know that you’re the greatest person I’ve ever met.”

Steve pinches your chin, holding your gaze before whispering out a shy “yeah?” 

You hear the insecurity laced in his voice as you nod fervently. “I kinda figured you weren’t as smart as you let on from our first date, but I said yes because even though you aren’t a brainiac you have a heart of gold. I see the way you take care of the kids, how you take care of your friends. And I love how you take care of me. I love you and everything about you, Steve Harrington.”

Steve blushes, his cheeks turn a rosy hue as he grabs your waist pressing his lips to yours in a kiss so sweet you think you’ll get a toothache. 

“You really love me?”

“I really do.”

Steve presses another kiss before murmuring out an I love you against your lips.

Yeah, Steve Harrington is stupid. Stupidly in love with you. 

[lexirosewrites]

Okay, no previous thoughts on this, it just occurred to me. (Slick Sunday ask!!!)

This is A canon divergence, a pretty big one, if I do say so myself.

Normal Omegaverse world, with The Party having all the common designations (Argyle, Eddie and Nancy being Alphas, Jon and Robin being omegas, Chrissy I'm still undecided, the pups still un-presented)

And there's Steve.

Everyone thinks he's a beta bc he doesn't really smell like a lot? And bc he's pretty much past the age range anyone would usually present, so.

The thing is.

Steve is not a Beta.

Or an Omega.

Or an Alpha.

He's not even a Human.

He's a human-eating monster who happened to develop feelings for some of his food (Namely, Nancy. And then the pups, and then he met Robin and.... He might have some really weird feelings for Eddie, actually).

So now he tries to fumble a bit in the whole being human thing, bc at first it was Easy™, he had no real friends, no family, just a persona to maintain while in town after eating some rich dude and forging his will so he could exist in Hawkins.

Anyways. Steve knows he's not the only fucked up thing in town, in fact, after becoming attached to Nancy and seeing the amount of grief the upside down causes her, he pretty much goes and starts a new diet based entirely of demo-creatures, as Steve can technically eat /anything/ it was just that humans were easy to come by.

When El seems to pop out of nowhere, Steve tries to avoid her with all his might, but eventually she finds him and they have a Talk™ about whether or not he's a danger to her friends.

All the upsidedown plots end up sidetracked not only by hormones, but the local monster dealing with it better than a bunch of humans can.

Still, the only reason they haven't caught on at all is mostly bc they think Steve is a weirdo. But like, psychologically insane, instead of biologically different from them.

The first time they realize is when Steve finally realizes what the dynamic is and, even though it's a bit late, fakes a first heat, he doesn't manage to get the Scent right and they're all immediately onto it.

So he ends up confessing he just wanted to be an Omega bc he really likes Eddie, and discovered that way he could totally be his partner and everyone is kinda endeared.

Eddie is going insane about the fact that the party wants to skip over the fact Steve is a literal monster who's been eating upsidedown creatures for years, but after a bit of processing accepts letting Steve try to court him, even if that's nowhere near Eddie thought his life was going, but he DOES like Steve a lot, might be kinda in love with him, actually.

So anyways, they live happily ever after even if people judge the fact that they're a Male alpha/ male "beta" couple bc they can't have children (they totally can though, it's just that no one has asked Steve yet, when Eddie finds out about this he immediately asks if they can have at least one, Steve is happy with that development).

steve doing his best to play omega so he can be with eddie 🥺

[strangertheories]

I've been seeing people saying that platonic Stobin is only benefitting Steve or that Robin only exists to redeem Steve from past homophobia and I'd like to politely disagree. I don't think enough people realise just how crucial their friendship was to Robin's character development outside of Steve, so I'll just spell it out here in this long post for the four year anniversary of Robin coming out to Steve.

At the start of S3, Robin is deeply sarcastic and jokingly rude, but this is not entirely what she is actually like deep down and the true Robin doesn't emerge until her and Steve are talking to each other in the bunker. She says that she acts like she doesn't care and that she floats above it all (in reference to popularity) but deep down, she just wants to feel normal and accepted.

But Robin knows she could never be accepted fully because of her attraction to women. If she acts like she doesn't care and holds Steve at an arm's length, it keeps her safe. Robin can't be rejected if she doesn't let him in. She doesn't believe anyone could ever be friends with her if they knew her secrets, so constructs this personality around herself, however deep down she is just insecure and struggling with internalised homophobia.

A lot of people talk about Robin's coming out scene, rightfully so, but I think we need to talk more about what happened before. When Steve tells Robin he's attracted to her, she looks devastated. With her guard let down after a near death experience and drugs, she was finally able to bond with someone who she now has to reject.

At first, she tries to talk Steve out of liking her. She tells him that he doesn't know the real her and that if he did, not only would be not want to date her, but he wouldn't even want to be her friend. This is where it all becomes clear that Robin's sarcasm and refusal to let her guard down is not linked to her sexuality but rather because of it.

This is why Steve accepting her is so crucial for her character from then onwards. For the first time in her life, Robin let someone see her true self, knowing that she would be rejected and lose her only friend. And yet she wasn't. Robin let Steve in and his acceptance finally enabled her to realise that just because she is gay it doesn't mean that she's abnormal or could never be happy. Obviously, there are safety concerns that prevent her from running through the streets of Hawkins with a pride flag, but I believe this acceptance is crucial to the version of Robin we see in S4.

After S4, there were a lot of complaints that the Robin we saw in that season wasn't like S3 enough and felt like a completely different character. Firstly, Robin was shown to speed talk, be unhelpful and miss social ques when nervous in the final episode of season 3, so I disagree with that criticism. But most importantly, the reason that S4 Robin is different to the one in S3 is because S3 Robin was never real. It was a character she built in order to avoid dealing with the pain of rejection or accepting that she cares about what other people think of her. But due to Steve, Robin is able to realise that she doesn't have to be someone else, hence her personality shift.

That's also kind of why I dislike the idea that her relationships with Nancy and Vickie are better than her one with Steve because she wouldn't have had those relationships if it wasn't for him. Steve enabled her to open up and let down her cool and sarcastic persona. Robin is anxious and awkward with Nancy and Vickie from the get go unlike with Steve, which ends up enabling her to ultimately make more real bonds with them much quicker. She would not have been able to do that if it wasn't for the value his acceptance brought into her life.

I'm going to get a bit mushy and personal here, so feel free to skip to the end, but platonic Stobin isn't just meaningful to the fictional character of Robin. I'm an autistic lesbian and I have had a lot of struggles with making and maintaining friendships. For a while, I didn't have any friends at all and I was very depressed. But now my mental health is so much better because I was able to find a friend who fully accepted me, who I didn't have to mask around, who I easily came out to. Becoming friends with her has enabled me to become way more comfortable with unmasking my autism outside of that one relationship because being more vulnerable is what enabled that friendship to be so much better in the long term.

Robin is a character I relate to a lot, and I've written a lot of posts on autistic Robin in the past. I think seeing friendships portrayed on screen where a girl is able to let down her mask, learn to become herself and become much less distant to the point that she explicitly feels comfortable telling someone she has issues with social ques is great for all kids. So many people, especially autistic people, struggle with being themselves and with finding friends. Maybe Robin did just exist to redeem Steve or whatever, but I know seeing that friendship on screen meant a lot to me. It's so difficult to find someone who accepts you and to open up to someone, but I think that platonic Stobin shows that it can be worth it.

Sorry for the mushy side tangent at the end, but I hope this post explains the importance of Steve's acceptance to Robin's character development. Acting like she only exists for Steve is dismissive of the impact that friendship had on the development Robin has and will have, especially if you view Rebel Robin as being somewhat canon. Not to mention, clarifying a loveable character is no longer homophobic feels like a pretty good thing.

[apomaro-mellow]

King&Prince 6

Nancy was pacing back and forth. Normally, it made Eddie anxious, but since he knew exactly what was on her mind, he decided to let her continue until her short legs tired her out.

"I just-I don't understand you. How can you give him free reign of the castle?"

"He doesn't have free reign", Eddie said.

"Did you put a collar on him? Or cuffs?", Nancy asked. When Eddie shook his head, she continued. "Do you put any sort of spell on him? Or charm?"

"Robin can handle herself. And there's always guards nearby if he steps out of line."

Nancy looked him up and down, then crossed her arms. "It's almost like you have faith in him or something."

Eddie couldn't describe what he was feeling. He couldn't forgive the Harringtons for what they had been doing. But Dustin was right. Unless he could prove that Steve had been directly responsible, it wasn't right to punish him. He could still dislike him, since he definitely benefited from the misdeeds of his family.

And there was a slim chance those hard feelings would ever change.

------------------------

Steve got dressed just in time to hear someone knock on the door.

"Hey, your royal slowness, we haven't got time for you to soak all day. I have actual important things to do."

It sounded like the woman from before. The one who didn't want him. Steve opened the door to her unimpressed face.

"Let's go."

"Without shoes?", Steve asked, looking down his bare feet.

"You won't need 'em."

She led him down the hall, past some windows and Steve got his first glimpse of the outside. It looked...normal. Nothing like the blackened, dead trees, and the dry, salted earth that he'd been led to believe this area was. The trees were wilting, sure, but in the typical way ones did in autumn. There was grass and even people doing chores outside.

Past the castle walls, he could make out something in the distance that looked like a town.

"Keep up!"

Steve tore his eyes away and saw that she was a long ways ahead of him. He jogged to catch up, noting the carpet on the floor. He was suddenly reminded of being very young and still allowed to go barefoot outside his quarters.

"Alright", she opened up a closet that was filled with instruments. "I need these moved over to the other end of the south wing and then polished and shined."

"So you're using a prince as both a pack mule and a maid?", Steve asked, brow raised. "What if I refuse?"

"Then I get our all-powerful king to put a compulsion hex on you and hypnotize you to do it anyway."

"Steve!", Dustin exclaimed when he came around the corner, beaming. "I went down to visit you and you were gone! They set you free?"

"I'm less free and more like free labor, apparently."

"You know you're not supposed to go down into the dungeons, Dustin."

"I see you've met Robin. Don't worry, she's nicer than she looks", Dustin grinned.

"Not nice enough to not tell Eddie what you've been doing. And I'm pretty sure he threatened to tell your mom. Maybe I'll just cut out the middle man", Robin warned.

Dustin paled. "You wouldn't dare."

Robin gestured to the musical instruments. "Help out with this and I won't tell a soul."

Dustin let out a breath of relief. "Menial work? That's it? Between Steve and me, we can knock this out easy."

Steve frowned. "I never said I'd-"

"This spoiled brat probably can't even lift a flute", Robin challenged.

"He knows how to kill a guy like a dozen different ways. Steve could finish this in like ten minutes", Dustin countered.

"Ooh, challenge accepted", Robin turned, ignoring Steve's protests. "I'll be in the second music room. Keep his highness on a tight leash."

Fully roped into it, Steve started hauling instruments. Dustin was talking, but he was thinking of his escape. He had no shackles, no bars. He could find a moment to get past the walls and then...maybe it would be better to sneak to the stables and get a horse first. He dreaded the thought of traveling such a distance with no shoes though. Maybe someone had a pair lying around?

Could he steal a pair in town without anyone noticing? He doubted most townsfolk would recognize him as an enemy prince. Steve was deep in his escape plan strategizing, that he just nodded along and 'mhm'ed to whatever it was that Dustin was saying. That kid could talk to a wall and keep the conversation going, which he was pretty much doing now, talking to Steve.

He barely even noticed that they were done moving things until the woman, Robin, threw a cloth at him.

"I want these shiny enough to see my reflection in them", she ordered.

"Why are you making him do all this?", Dustin asked.

"I'm getting new students tomorrow and they deserve nice equipment."

Dustin's eyes narrowed. "Who?"

"Oh no one you'd know. Except for Mike."

"Mike?!"

"And Max. And El, oh and Lucas and", Robin went on naming people, some Steve knew, others that he didn't.

"Bullshit! There's no way they're all taking classes!"

"Oh they are. And you are too", Robin said while leaving the room.

Incredulous, Dustin followed her out, leaving Steve alone in the room. Alone. They had left him alone. He looked to the open door, leading out into the hallway, then the instruments spread out on tables and the floor, covered in dust.

-------------------

Jeff and Nancy were strolling the halls, discussing how best to prepare for any sort of retaliation when they heard whistling. It wasn't the sound that gave them pause, but where it was coming from. A music room that wasn't supposed to be in use yet. They poked their heads in and saw Prince Steve, whistling a happy working tune while shining a shining a trumpet.

The two of them pulled their heads out, shared a mutual expression of confusion and went to seek out Eddie to report to him, but he was nowhere to be found. That usually meant he was off in town or visiting some other part of the kingdom. Either way, they wouldn't be able to talk to him until he returned.

Steve didn't spend too long rationalizing why he was doing this. He was just biding his time until he came up with a more solid plan. Even though his homeland wasn't really a home, at least no one there wanted to actively kill him. He wasn't safe here and he couldn't forget that. He especially couldn't let his guard down around the king.

Robin remembered him a couple of hours later and led him back to the room he'd first been brought to. Steve had time to actually look at it now. Smaller than his own room but larger than the prison cell. Definitely warmer to. But besides that, it was very minimal and sparse. A bed, a small drawer, and the bathroom. Steve wondered what this room was for. It was an odd sort of guest room.

Robin said something about dinner being brought up but Steve paid it no mind when he realized he'd be sleeping on a bed tonight. He collapsed into it and buried himself in the blanket. He'd be having sleep for dinner.

Part 8

Tag Team

@thesuninyaface @only-evanescent @snakeorsquid @ignoremyworld @theclichefortunecookie @goodolefashionedloverboi @just-a-tiny-void @0body0disphoria0 @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @samsoble @sugartin @jamieweasley13 @y4r3luv @xtkxkrzrizir @un-knownperson @greekgeek24 @justdrugsformethanks @potato-of-the-lord @notaqueenakhaleesi @swimmingbirdrunningrock @queenie-ofthe-void @nebulainajar @lil-gremlin-things

[graysmiles-world]

Steddie Faking Dating, Part 1

Eddie Munson was cuckoo bananas. Steve knew that. The entirety of Hawkins High knew that. Most of Hawkins, in general, knew that. Which makes it all the more insane that Steve did what he did.

He fell in love with him.

Trust him. Steve knows how mad, psycho, and every other word there is for “batshit crazy” there is for it. But he can’t help it! Steve’s a romantic at heart, and Eddie is the most romantic person he’s ever met. He wraps around Steve like an octopus, kissing every bit of skin in reach. He’s sung, like, at least four different songs for Steve on his electric guitar, which he didn’t even know could be romantic. 

All in all, Steve was in love. Flipped around the head and spun until you’re dizzy kind of love. Although he hadn’t said it yet, Steve imagined Eddie feeling the same. Like the stares that Steve feels whenever he turns away from Eddie are brands pressed hot against his cheek. Like every kiss, cheek grab, and cuddle, Eddie pushed his love into Steve in any way he could. Eddie was always the more physical of the two.

But they weren’t yet at the stage where an “I love you” is acceptable. With Nancy, Steve was the one who said it first, two days after their fifth-month anniversary. Nancy said it back but later was informed that she never loved him. He’s going to take it more carefully with this one. They were only a few days past four months in, and it was much too soon to be throwing around the ‘L’ word. Steve just sat - zoning off on break at his summer Scoop’s Ahoy! job. He just turned over the words in his mind until they were no longer recognizable, but the feeling was still warming his chest.

“Steve!” Robin’s harsh shout comes from the front. Steve lurched from his daydream. Suddenly, the sound of crying children and the stickiness of the table in front of him became a reality.

Steve groaned, tilting back until the chair he sat on tipped back, and he could look back at the clock. It took him a second, it being upside down, but it was definitely only 2:28 p.m.

“I’ve got two minutes left!” he shouted, letting his chair fall back on all four legs. He ignored Robin’s grumbling and threats of bodily mutilation to stare at the blank wall before him and breathe in the sickly sweet smell of melted ice cream. It was petty, sure, but Robin had done the same to him, like, three times since the summer started. And he was not one to give up 120 seconds of precious zoning out time.

“Dingus!” Robin shouted, sounding much closer than before. She banged open the door to the backroom, the knob hitting the wall and leaving a mark.

“Jesus, Buckley!” Steve jumps, looking over to her unimpressed scowl and crossed arms. 

“Break time’s over,” she tapped her wrist, despite the fact that there was no actual watch there. Steve rolled his eyes and grabbed the sailor's cap from where he threw it at the start of his break.

Robin laughed at his quiet grumbles as he passed him, patting him condescendingly on the back. She let the door swing shut, and Steve flinched at the large bang that echoed throughout the storefront. Avoiding the many kids’ and adults’ eyes, he turned back to admonish her - only to find that Robin wasn’t even there.

Steve could hear her witch’s cackle through the closed window, but it could have just been in his head, to be fair. But instead of arguing with her, which would lead to several customer complaints, he let her take her break. Steve was not in the mood to deal today.

He crammed the stupid hat on his head and turned to the storefront where a couple of giggling preteens already stood. 

After, he just amused himself by looking over to the clock (which definitely moved at like half the speed as the clock in the breakroom, he’s sure of it) and returned to work. Robin joined after her own break, and they worked in tandem. It turns out they’re an okay team when they’re not at each other’s throats, but Steve won’t say that not wanting to tempt fate in one of her many taunts. Robin seemed just as tired of scooping ice cream as he was, so she didn’t even make any snide comments as they closed up Scoops Ahoy! for the night. 

The next day went mostly the same, but Steve was much more excited.

“What’s got your panties in a bunch?” Robin asked, looking concerned at his constant smile. It wasn’t even a customer service one, but a real one. One hurt Steve’s cheeks a bit from how much he was beaming.

“Nothing, just having a friend come over tonight,” he told her - trying to seem casual. Something told him, though, that his “super casual shrug” didn’t help him. Heat crept up his neck and ears, and Steve was grateful that most of it was covered by hair.

Robin leaned forward onto the counter, setting her chin on her fists and fluttering her eyelashes daintily at him. “Oh, is this a lady-friend perhaps? One that you wooed with your ‘Steve Harrington Charm,’” she said - making bunny ears around “Steve Harrington Charm.” 

“No,” he said, shaking his head and focusing on the mint chip ice cream he was switching out with a new batch. “I told you, I’m not interested in a relationship right now.”

Robin snorted meanly, “Sure.”

Desperate to turn the conversation off himself and onto her: “Hey, what about you? Got any secret admirers out there?”

Steve still wasn’t looking at his coworker, but he could hear her choke at the question. It felt a little good, he won’t lie, turning it back around on her.

“I’ve got a boyfriend,” she said after a moment, tapping her fingers against the counter to the beat of the corny song constantly playing through the speakers. “Might hang out with him after work today,” she shrugged, “Don’t know yet.”

Steve nodded, grabbing the empty ice cream container and returning it to the back to be taken out with the rest of the trash at the night's end. Thankfully, that won’t be him because he was able to get out early by switching with Clark, one of the other “crewmates.” He would have to take an early morning shift next Tuesday, but Steve still thought it was worth it. Eddie was coming over that night, and even though Steve could see him earlier that week, he couldn’t help but be excited. 

When Steve got home that afternoon, he immediately stripped from his uniform and threw it in the hamper, covering it with some other dirty clothes. Heaven knows how Eddie would react if he saw that piece of clothing.

He’d probably ask Steve to wear it for sex, to be honest. And not that Steve wasn’t up for that (he was always up to sex with Eddie), but he only had one of these uniforms, and it needed to last for the entire summer.

Steve then jumped in the shower, scrubbing the stink of the nauseating scent of gone-bad ice cream and kid vomit. Children shouldn’t have a double fudge sundae after running around in the hot sun for three hours. Who knew? Not that kid’s parents, from how they whined and tried to give explanations as Steve was forced to mop it up.

Robin had way too much fun laughing at him from behind the counter, so Steve went to the bathroom when he saw Erica approaching them across the food court. 

When Eddie knocked on Steve’s door at 3:45, fifteen minutes after he said he’d show up (like Steve knew he would be), the house was perfectly set up for movie night. Steve was already dressed in his old basketball sweatpants and one of Eddie’s shirts that he left behind too many times for Steve to be willing to give it back now. 

Also, the look on Eddie’s face whenever he saw Steve wearing one of his band t-shirts was one of Steve’s favorites. This is only made better by Steve immediately shutting down any lust building him in eyes with an eye roll and a pull towards the couch.

Eddie whistled, “All setup, aren’t you sweetheart?”

Steve threw a throw pillow at the back of Eddie’s head, uncaring the squawk he let out. “Shut up.”

“Betrayed!” Eddie flailed about, falling back onto the couch, one foot on the cushion. “Hoaxed! Hoodwinked!”

Steve snorted, slapping Eddie’s socked foot aside and falling towards him - making sure to land on his outstretched hands and now Eddie’s ribs. He pressed his lips against Eddie’s before he started the dramatic monologue that Steve knew was coming.

Eddie surrounded immediately, moving to clutch his (or Eddie’s) shirt in both hands. Steve kept the kiss from becoming too dirty because he wanted to watch some movies but was content to make out for a few minutes longer. And God, did Eddie know how to make out with someone? It was wet and hot, sloppy than any other make-out he’d had with anyone else - but Steve loved it. He loved him. 

He felt that familiar bubbling in his stomach, the urge to lean back and spit it out - so instead, he pressed forward. He dug his tongue between Eddie’s lips as he liked and let him do it before. Eddie’s stubble scratched against his cheeks, and his shoulder started hurting a bit, but Steve didn’t ever want to move. 

Unfortunately, the choice was taken from him when Eddie pulled back, chuckling a bit when Steve tried to follow. “It seems my swindling worked,” he crowed quietly, pressing short but hard kisses against everything but Steve’s lips. 

Steve opened his eyes, staring right into Eddie’s endlessly dark eyes. They were crinkled, and it took everything in Steve not to melt into goo. Instead, he raised a brow. “You think you tricked me, Munson?”

Eddie guffawed a laugh, his chest bouncing underneath Steve’s. “Munson, huh? You brought me back down to last names, Harrington?”

Steve couldn’t handle being close to Eddie and not kissing anymore, so he mumbled, “You betcha, Munson,” before returning to the previously scheduled content. 

Steve could have spent the rest of his life kissing Eddie on this couch. Unfortunately for both of them, their young bodies couldn’t hold up in that position forever, and they were forced to move only a few minutes later. It was only then that Steve remembered the original purpose for Eddie coming over that night.

“Alright,” he said, pushing back from Eddie’s warmth. “I didn’t just invite you to make out.”

“You didn’t?” Eddie asked, pouting like it was terrible news. Steve just rolled his eyes (he swore, one day, they were going to get stuck like that). He kicked at Eddie’s leg that was being dragged teasingly up his own and stumbled over to the TV - unapologetically adjusting himself in his sweatpants. He ignored Eddie’s groan at the sight and busied himself with picking a movie.

“Which one do you want? Steve called back to him. 

“What do you got?” Eddie called back, too lazy to stand over and come over to see for himself.

Steve shuffled through the VHSs, cringing at the choices. They were all from when he was a kid when his parents loaded up on movies so he wouldn’t bother them. 

“Uh,” Steve started - trying to find some that wouldn’t be terrible to watch. “Superman 1 and 2, Jaws, Willy Wonka in the Chocolate Factory,” he listed them out, not thinking as he went from VHS to VHS.

“What the fuck, Stevie!” Eddie crackled behind him. “What’s with these movies?”

Steve felt the back of his neck go hot. “They’re all from when I was a kid, okay?”

“Wow, kid you had a shit taste.”

Steve laughed but covered it up with a cough, but not very successfully from Eddie’s crackle from behind him. “Do you want to help pick one, or are you just going to complain the whole time,” he glared mockingly at Eddie. 

When Eddie finally decided to wander over, they chose Monty Python and Holy Grail, which came with the least amount of ribbing from Eddie. 

Steve went into the kitchen to pop some popcorn and grab some beers while Eddie made a nest from the blanks and pillows. He did it whenever they were getting comfy, so Steve dragged down the softest blankets around the house. 

When Steve returned to the living room, he could see the mop of curly dark hair barely visible above the mound of blankets. Once more, that bubbly, giggly feeling rose in his chest. He felt almost bouncing as he made his way over to his boyfriend, setting down the food before moving to turn on the TV. When the opening music rang through the house, Steve jumped on the other cushion, watching as Eddie screeched at his tower of softness that fell off of him and over onto Steve’s lap. Ignoring Eddie’s protests, Steve gathered some to wrap around himself, curling up so his head rested on the couch's arm, his feet tangling with Eddie’s - who was doing the same.

Steve settled in, letting every lousy thing he carried with him flow out with every giggle Eddie tried to hide, and every time he crowed to the screen, definitely not trying to silence those. Steve dozed, letting the lights and sound of the television wash over him with the warmth of Eddie’s legs pressed against his own. He felt Eddie stroking his ankle, the chill of his rings against his sleep-warmed skin making Steve kick a bit. 

Finally, when the movie ended and the credits started to roll, Eddie rolled up to his feet. He left his hair in the crazy mess that it was, moving over to where Steve was still lying horizontal on the couch. Steve looked up at him through squinted eyes, barely able to see the curve of his lips in the dim lighting.

“Hey, let’s get you to bed,” Eddie told him, running his hands through his hair. Steve grumbled, wanting to stay in the warmth of the blankets, in Eddie’s heat. He must have told him that because Eddie’s smile faded, and a frown took his place. “Sorry, Stevie, I can’t tonight.”

Something cold rushed over him, goosebumps erupting all over his arms and the back of his neck. He pushed himself so he was sitting, dislodging Eddie’s hand. Eddie held his hand out for a second, debating where to set it, but just dropped it so it hung limply at his side. Steve smiled at him, letting his sleepy exterior hide the little tick in his heartbeat. 

“That’s okay,” he whispered, not wanting to ruin their created atmosphere. “Just get home safe, okay?” Steve leaned forward, pecking him on the cheek. 

Eddie’s expression smoothed out, the glint returning. “Of course, sweetheart.” He stood up, smacking a significant kiss against Steve’s hair with a mwah! Steve watched him stumble over to his shoes, jumping as he crammed them on his feet. He saluted Steve before falling through the door, out into the darkness and out of sight. 

Steve sat there for another minute or two or ten. He only stood up when the air conditioner kicked on, chilling the air. He thought momentarily about curling back in the blankets and falling asleep on the couch. But it looked unappetizing in the moonlight without anyone to warm it up. 

He flopped onto his bed, covers cool against his face, and he barely flipped up the blankets and got under them before the phone on his nightstand began to ring. Steve groaned, looking over to the clock. 

“Who’s calling at 1 a.m.?” he grumbled, grabbing the phone and resisting the urge to yell at whoever was on the other end. “Hello?” 

“Hey Stevie,” Eddie said, a smile apparent in his voice. Steve felt his shoulders relax; something cracked in his body smoothing at the sound of his voice. “Just wanted to let you know I got home okay.”

“Yeah,” Steve swallowed, “That’s good. Thanks.”

“And I had to say sorry about being unable to stay over,” Eddie continued. Steve fell, so he was on his back, cord stretching to lie comfortably. 

“It’s fine-” he tried to say, but Eddie interrupted.

“It’s just that Uncle Wayne needs my help in the trailer in the morning, fixing up the shower and whatnot.” 

“Oh,” Steve breathed. Whatever else that was displaced from Eddie’s disappearance was gone. “I understand.” He didn’t. He can’t remember the last time his dad asked for his help or the previous his mother wanted him home in the morning.

“Yeah, but I’ll see you soon - okay?” There was a thud and a curse. “Shit, I just slammed my elbow into the wall.”

Steve chuckled laughter loudly in such a silent room. “Of course you did.”

“Dick,” Eddie chuckled. “I’ll let you get some rest. Good night, Steve.”

“Good night, Eddie,” Steve said, and the phone went dead. Steve white-knuckled the handle, just looking up at the ceiling. He returned it on the receiver when the buzz grew too much and rolled over. Within moments, he was asleep. 

Next Part ->

[trybeforeyoudeny]

“C’mon Ed’s, there’s gotta be someone here that catches your eye.”

Nancy had dragged her best friend all the way to Indy with the promise of finding him a suitable match- much to Eddie’s dismay. He didn’t want to find a match. He knows he’s not exactly the type of guy people are interested in, even at the gay bar they’re currently drinking at.

What’s worse is the thought of actually finding someone that he’s interested in here just to go back to Hawkins once the weekend is over and wallow in his own self-pity.

“Nope, no one,” he replies dryly before downing the rest of his beer.

“Hmph,” she lets out an irritated noise before raising her glass to her lips, peaking over the top to scope out the crowd. “What about him?” She juts her chin out.

“Who are you… him? Are you serious?” He scowls when his eyes land on the man she’s looking at. He’s practically a ken doll in real life with slicked-back blonde hair and icy blue eyes that are cutting through him from across the bar.

“What? Not into the pretty boy type?” She raises a brow at him and continues her search.

“Obviously not! What about me says that’s my-”he pauses mid-sentence, jaw slacked as he looks past the ken doll and sees the most beautiful man he’s ever laid eyes on.

“What were you saying about that not being your type?” She smirks.

“What? I- oh, shut up!” He groans, not taking his eyes off the brunette on the dance floor.

“Wait, he looks familiar. Eddie, is that-“

“Steve Harrington?!” His eyes widen and his heart drops.

It’s been nearly a decade since graduation but the constellation of moles on his neck and body- Jesus H. Christ, that crop top is doing things to him- and those honeyed brown eyes are all he needs to confirm it’s him, king Steve. But what the hell is he doing here?

“He’s certainly caught your eye,” Nancy snorts from beside him, nudging him up off his seat.

“What the hell are you doing?” He nearly shrieks as she pushes him in the direction of the dance floor.

“What do you think I’m doing? Go talk to him!”

“I can’t just go talk to Steve Harrington, Nance. He’s probably not even gay! He’s gotta be here with someone else playing as their wingman,” he scours the mess of sweaty bodies, searching for anyone else he may know.

“Ha! See? Buckleys here as well! He must be with her,” he smiles proudly but it drops quickly when he feels himself still being ushered away.

“Just go Ed, you don’t have to shove your tongue down his throat, just make conversation,” she urges him, pleading at him with her eyes to give it a chance. To let someone in.

“Fine, whatever. I won’t say I told you so when I’m back here in two minutes with a bruised eye and an even more bruised ego,” he rolls his eyes and shuffles his way towards the crowd, twisting and turning his way around people until he’s stood right in front of the jock himself.

Eddie had always hated Steve in high school- at least that’s what he told himself to hide the embarrassingly huge crush he had on him growing up.

Towards the end of his final senior year, they ran in very similar circles yet hardly interacted face to face. He hated the way the kids absolutely raved about him and his jealousy got in the way of ever giving him a fair chance even when they ended up at the same events as one another. There had been birthdays, graduations, Joyce and hoppers wedding- and though they’d be in close proximity they hardly acknowledged each other.

Eventually, he had heard that he and Robin moved to Indie and had accepted the fact that they would never get the chance to grow their relationship past anything more than reluctant acquaintances.

Standing in front of him now he’s seeing a much different side of Steve. The Steve he knew was a ladies man- a polo-wearing jock who was the captain of the swim team and floated through school without as much as a turned-up nose in his direction while Eddie was the Satan worshipping freak, a name given to him by his lovely classmates.

The Steve standing in front of him now was a completely different person. He’s wearing denim shorts and a cropped top, remnants of glitter scattered across his cheeks like kisses. Eddie has to stop himself from chuckling at the idea of Robin pinning Steve down to apply it, and… eyeliner?!

Eddie feels like he’s about to pass away on the spot and he forgets how to breathe.

“Hello?”

Oh. Oh shit. Right. He’s supposed to be saying something right now, not gawking at him.

“Um, hi?” It comes out like a question and he wants to slap a hand against his forehead. Why did he let Nancy drag him into this situation?

Before he can come up with anything to say Steve’s leaning in oh so close with a smirk on his face, brushing a loose strand of hair behind Eddie’s ear before whispering into it, “do you come here often? I haven’t seen you here before and I’d definitely remember you.”

Eddie nearly scoffs at that because clearly, Steve isn’t remembering him.

“It’s my first time, big boy,” he responds swiftly, a sideways grin painted on his face.

There’s a flash of something in Steve’s eyes when the nickname leaves his lips and Eddie is beginning to realize that Steve may not be as straight as he previously assumed. And well… he doesn’t know what to do with that information.

“What’s your name, handsome?” Steve purrs while twirling one of Eddie’s loose curls around his finger.

“Eddie,” he deadpans, waiting to see if anything clicks for Steve.

It does.

Steve freezes, dropping Eddie’s curl before taking a step back and looking him up and down.

“Eddie,” Steve echoes, big doe eyes widening at the realization.

Eddie looks different now but he’s still the same Eddie he crushed on in the eighties. His hair is cut slightly shorter now and is pulled up into a wild bun with loose curls flying free around his face. His style has toned down since high school but it’s still so Eddie.

He’s still got his dark ripped jeans but his battle vest is traded in for a black shirt with the sleeves cut off, the arm holes dipping low enough to show off the new tattoos covering his ribs. He wants to reach out and touch them.

“So you do remember me, Harrington!” Eddie teases, setting Steve on fire.

“I-yes, of course I do Eddie. I’m sorry I didn’t recognize you at first… I think I’ve had too many of those fruity cocktails,” he admits.

“I suppose I’ll forgive you just this once,” Eddie chides, “if you’ll buy my next drink.”

“That I can do,” Steve smiles and oh… oh god his smile. Was it always this breathtaking?

The pair head back to the bar where they find Robin and Nancy deep in conversation, both of them leaning in close and giggling way too much for this to be a casual chat so they sneak past them and don’t interrupt.

Steve orders them both a colourful drink with a little umbrella sticking out of it, something Eddie would never have ordered for himself but he’s delightfully surprised when he takes a sip of the fruity concoction.

“What brings you to Indy?” Steve questions with a tilt of his head.

“Uhh,” he rubs the back of his head nervously. “Honestly, Nance dragged me out here to try to meet some guys. Hawkins isn’t exactly the best place to meet other gay men, y’know?”

“Oh I definitely know,” Steve nods and Eddie feels a weight lift off his chest at the response. “Part of the reason Rob and I moved out here was to be apart of a better community. Although it was hard to leave the kids, Joyce, hop… you.”

“Me?” Eddie’s eyes widen and he jolts back a bit as if he’s been electrocuted. “We weren’t… I mean, we were never close…”

“Yeah but I still had a big stupid crush on you,” Steve admits out loud, so causally that Eddie thinks he must have misheard him until he looks up and sees the nervous look on Steve's face as he awaits some sort of response.

“I… you had a crush on me?” He points between them for emphasis as he speaks.

“Mhm, a giant one. You were kinda my bi-awakening dude,” Steve laughs nervously, hiding his blush behind his drink.

Eddie short circuits.

He can’t believe what he’s hearing but Steve sounds so genuine he has no choice but to believe every word he says.

Had he been blind? Were there signs of Steve’s feelings that he hadn’t noticed? He thinks back to the late summer barbecues in the Hoppers back yard, how Steve always seemed to sit next to him at the picnic tables even when there were other places to sit. How Steve was always quick to offer up his house for the D&D campaigns when he didn’t have to, how he’d driven him back and forth to work for a week straight in 1987 when his van broke down even though the two of them had never spent time alone before that.

He always assumed the little things steve did was because of the kids, because of Dustin. That he was trying to be kind to Eddie because the party cared about them both and he wanted harmony within the group.

Looking back he feels like an idiot.

“Well, between you and me,” Eddie leans in close and Steve leans into it. “You were my gay awakening back in like, middle school man.”

“Middle school?” Steve pulls away with wide eyes.

“Mhm,” Eddie nods, finishing off the rest of his drink to get some liquid courage before continuing. “Eight grade, swim team,” Eddie whistles, leaning back in his seat. “Let’s just say I had no interest in swimming.”

Steve lets out a bark of laughter, cheeks hurting from smiling so wide.

“So why didn’t you talk to me?”

“Are you kidding? I don’t think eighth-grade Harrington would have taken well to the freak having a crush on him.”

Steve winces and Eddie immediately regrets what he said, albeit it is the truth.

“Yeah, you’re right,” he nods slowly. “I’m sorry. I was an asshole back then.”

“You were a kid,” Eddie shrugs. “Clearly you’ve changed. I should have noticed that you were different all those years ago… before you moved away.” But I didn’t want to, he wants to add but doesn’t dare say it aloud.

“Still-“

“Ah ah! Nope, it’s in the past,” he cuts him off before Steve has the chance to spiral. “But now that we’re here, I’d like to get to know the real you more,” he hope he doesn’t sound too forward or worse, desperate.

“I’d like to get the real you as well,” Steve blushes back and Eddie feels as though he might combust. “Why don’t we get out of here? Go somewhere quieter?”

“I’d love to,” Eddie replies, looking down at his lap to hide the heat raising in his own cheeks.

Steve extends his hand to help Eddie down from the tall stool and they make their way out of the bar, giggling and leaning into each other's space, hopeful and excited.

[steddieas-shegoes]

Chapter 6

Chapter 1 / Chapter 2 / Chapter 3 / Chapter 4 / Chapter 5

“Oh would you look who decided to acknowledge I exist?”

Steve didn’t hold back his eye roll at Robin’s words since she couldn’t see him. He’d decided to call her on the walk to his car after work, just to update her on things and make sure she was okay if he wasn’t home right after work.

“We just saw each other yesterday.”

“More than 24 hours ago, Steve.”

“We are two separate humans, Robin.”

“But only one brain. Look at you separating a whole brain. This is why I couldn’t concentrate today. You took it with you.”

“Are you done?” Steve sighed. “If you’re done, I need to talk to my best friend.”

“What’s wrong?” Robin’s tone went from slightly annoyed to concerned, which meant she’d never actually been that annoyed to begin with.

“Nothing’s wrong. I just wanted to let you know I’ll be home late.”

Please don’t ask, please just accept it, don’t ask, don’t ask.

“Why?”

Fuck.

“Just stopping by Eddie’s for a bit.”

He was met with complete silence. He pulled his phone away to make sure the call hadn’t been dropped. It hadn’t.

“Robs?”

“Steve. I’m saying this because I love you.” Oh boy, here we go. “I’m worried.”

“There’s nothing to worry about. I’m just hanging out for a bit and then coming home.”

“You’ve practically lived with him since Saturday!”

“Okay, just because I slept over…”

“Twice! In a row!”

“It doesn’t mean anything.”

“Uh huh. It doesn’t mean anything except you have barely been home and you literally went to subspace and dropped and probably subspace again with this stranger who did one nice tattoo and suddenly you’re ready to fly to Vegas and forget me!”

Ah. Steve let himself feel guilty for a moment before he remembered her insistence just a few weeks before that he needed to find other friends besides her, be social, maybe find a boyfriend.

Well, now he was doing some of that and she had a problem?

“I’m just enjoying my time with someone new. This is what you’ve wanted me to do forever, right?”

“Not like this!”

“Oh, I’m sorry I’m not following your rules for my friendships.”

“This isn’t a friendship, this is some weird sexual situation that’s gonna end up messy and you’re gonna end up hurt. It’ll be Nancy all over again.”

That hurt. Robin had been the one to get him through the Nancy heartbreak, always offering whatever support he needed while he worked through his disappointment that turned into an identity crisis that turned into a bit of a change of personality. She never judged him for his response to it. She was the perfect friend.

Having her throw it at him like this left a sour taste in his mouth and a hollowness in his chest.

She’d never spoken to him like this, not even when they got into stupid little arguments about cleaning the common areas of the apartment that sometimes escalated more than they should. This felt like she was jealous and taking it out on him.

Jealous of what though? She never seemed interested in having an actual relationship, and she was out all the time, leaving him to fend for himself in their apartment.

“I just don’t want you to get hurt, Steve.”

“Yeah, well. I appreciate the concern.”

Steve hung up. It wasn’t the mature thing to do, he knew that. But he was hurt, and he didn’t want to make things worse by letting the hurt out on her. He would talk to her when he got back home.

They were best friends, platonic soulmates. They’d get past this.

But for now, Steve turned his notifications off on his phone, got in his car, and drove to Eddie’s house.

– - – – – –

He made it inside with no issues, putting the key back under the mat once the front door was unlocked.

He pulled his phone out of his pocket once he was inside, ignoring the many texts from Robin to send a quick text to Eddie.

Made it home. Gonna make spaghetti. That okay?

He was looking around the kitchen to find all of the things he’d need when his phone started buzzing.

Eddie was calling.

“Hey, thought you’d be with the client.”

“I am, but it’s a friend. She’s taking a break. How was the rest of your day?”

Steve didn’t want him to know about his fight with Robin, not when most of it revolved around how quickly he was becoming attached to him.

“It was fine. Um, spaghetti’s okay? I just figured you probably had stuff for it.”

Eddie didn’t immediately respond, and Steve tried not to let himself worry.

“Spaghetti’s perfect. What happened, sunshine?”

How did he know? Steve was notorious for hiding his feelings from people, he’d been a champion for most of his life out of self-preservation.

“Nothing. I’m fine,” Steve was putting everything into being convincing.

Eddie was at work, he didn’t need to deal with Steve’s problems.

“Stevie, did something upset you? Do you need me to come home?”

God, of course he would offer to hurry back. He was so nice and Steve didn’t deserve it.

“Steve. I will leave right now and come back, just say the word.”

“No, no. I’m okay. Just had an argument with Robin. I’ll be fine.”

“I’m sorry, sunshine. What will help?”

He didn’t know. He didn’t think he could really talk about it right now. He didn’t want Eddie to feel like he had to talk him through it when he was with a client.

He started to feel worse.

“I think maybe I should head back early tonight. Make sure I see her before she goes to bed.”

“Okay, sweetheart. I’ll be done here in an hour. You don’t have to cook anything, I’ll just grab us something on the way.”

“No. It’ll keep me busy. Can I cook please?”

He didn’t mean to sound so whiny, or practically beg, but it must have worked because Eddie gave in.

“If you really want to, you can cook. But I want you to go change into my clothes first, okay?”

Thank God Eddie couldn’t see the redness of his cheeks spreading down his neck.

“Okay. Can I wear your hoodie?”

He knew it would smell like him, and he knew it was soft, and he knew it would make him feel a million times better.

“Yeah, sweetheart. It’s on the bed. I’ll text you when I leave here, but call me if you need me before that.”

“I will.”

“Good boy. See you soon, sunshine.”

Steve felt warmer, lighter, more like he could handle the feelings Robin brought up. He knew if he could feel like this for a little bit, he could easily handle whatever conversation they’d have when he got home.

— — — — — —

Steve was so focused on the sauce he was making, he didn’t hear the front door open or footsteps come through the living room and into the kitchen or Eddie walking up behind him.

He felt strong arms wrap around his chest from behind, a soft kiss placed on his temple.

He leaned back against the warmth of Eddie, the calm he exuded taking over the whole kitchen.

“Welcome home, Eds.”

“Mm. Could get used to that,” Eddie said as he kissed Steve’s cheek, then his jaw, his neck.

Steve was doing his best to stay focused. He was cooking dinner, right.

He started to lean forward, but Eddie pulled him back again.

“Babe, I have to cook,” Steve giggled.

“Not done,” Eddie said against his neck, teeth barely scraping against Steve’s pulse point and causing him to let out a moan.

“I don’t.” Kiss. “Want this.” Kiss. “To.” Tongue.

Fuck.

“You keep cooking, sunshine. I’m just gonna enjoy my appetizer.”

“But I made garlic bread,” Steve pouted, pulling away as much as Eddie would let him. “For an appetizer.”

Eddie pulled away and looked at Steve, blinking at him as if he were confused.

Then he broke out in a huge smile.

“You’re trouble, sunshine.”

And to Steve, that sounded like he was saying something entirely different.

— — — — — — —

They didn’t talk about Robin.

Steve put their food on plates while Eddie grabbed some beers from the fridge.

It was very domestic. Comfortable. Nice.

Eddie insisted on sitting right next to Steve, one hand on his thigh for the entire dinner. His thumb was rubbing back and forth, his fingers sometimes drew designs on his knee, and he tapped rhythms into his skin until it felt like Steve was part of the song.

It was easy.

They talked about their days. Steve gave him the full play-by-play of his meeting with Will and Eddie kissed his cheek when he was done and told him how happy he was that Will liked it.

Eddie told him about his appointment, Chrissy, who he’d been good friends with since high school. He’d shown her that tattooing was a way to love her body when she’d been diagnosed with an eating disorder. He promised her he’d do any tattoo she wanted for free if she went through the intensive rehab and therapy process, and four months later, she came by his shop and became his favorite client on top of one of his best friends.

Steve leaned his head on Eddie’s shoulder as he spoke, smiling to himself as he realized that Eddie was just a caring person.

He cared about everyone in his life in a way that Steve had not been familiar with before Robin.

He cared the way Steve cared, and he made Steve want to show it more.

He made Steve want to be bright in a way he’d never wanted to be before.

Eddie made him feel like he could shine.

He felt the impending rain cloud of leaving his side, though. Facing Robin would be a storm he didn’t want to weather tonight, feeling a bit overwhelmed already from his day of emotions.

It had started so good. It felt good right now.

“You got quiet on me, sunshine. What’s goin’ on in that pretty head of yours?”

A lot. So much. He didn’t know how to answer without putting everything on the table, and he knew he couldn’t do that right now. He didn’t want to cry either and that was getting more likely the more tired he got.

“Just thinking.”

“Wanna talk about it?”

“I don’t know where to start.”

“Anywhere you want is fine with me, sweetheart.”

Steve could tell him a little. Maybe talk about how much he wanted to stay by Eddie’s side. Or how he didn’t know how he was already so attached, but the thought of not having Eddie around was already devastating.

How much he could love him if he was given the chance.

“I’m scared that Robin’s right.”

Well, that’ll spark a conversation he didn’t want to have.

Nice job, idiot. You’re gonna end up spilling your secrets.

“Right about what?”

Eddie’s arm was now wrapped around Steve’s shoulder, hand resting against his arm where his fingers were tracing designs that Steve would tattoo on his skin.

“She said this is gonna end bad. I’ll get hurt. She didn’t want me to come tonight.”

Yeah, that’s not giving too much away.

Eddie’s fingers froze against his arm.

“She thinks I’d hurt you?”

“I guess.”

And a part of Steve believed it too. That was part of why he felt so shitty. Eddie already held the power to hurt him and he didn’t even realize it.

“Stevie, look at me for a minute.”

Steve pulled away, letting Eddie’s arm fall, but quickly finding his hand to lace their fingers together for extra comfort.

“I know this is gonna sound crazy, and it’s okay if you don’t wanna stick around after, but,” Eddie’s eyes were shining. Was he going to cry? “I’ve never felt like this with anyone. I’ve never wanted to spend every moment with someone before you. I missed you so much today, it was like I was being torn in half. I know it’s crazy. I know. But you’re important to me. I don’t know what will happen, I don’t know what you want, I just know that I wouldn’t ever intentionally hurt you.”

Steve could feel his lip quivering. He knew he had tears in his eyes.

He was in deep and the only way out was through.

“I don’t know how to explain how much being around you has changed me. Just in the last two days I’ve felt like someone I didn’t even know I could be. Robin’s worried because,” Steve took a deep, steadying breath. He had to be honest. Eddie deserved it. “I jump into things quickly. I’ve always been like that. I commit hard and fast and I end up hurt every time. She was around for the worst one with my ex-girlfriend. She’s worried this will be like that and thinks you’re just using me for the sexual aspect of it. Well, she thinks we’re using each other, I think. And maybe if you were different, I would be. I’m not always a great guy. But it’s just that you’re you. You’re the kind of person who will always get the best me because you deserve someone who makes you feel the way you make other people feel.”

The words just didn’t stop coming.

Steve would’ve been more nervous about it if he wasn’t watching the fondness seep out of Eddie’s pores.

His every movement revolved around Steve’s own, his touches gentle and electric.

His hand was cupping the side of Steve’s neck, his eyes staring into Steve’s soul, even though he’d just laid it out on the table in front of them.

“You deserve to be the best you because it makes you feel good. But if I can help you find that, then I’m all yours, sunshine. As long as you want me.”

Steve leaned forward, resting his forehead against Eddie’s.

He closed his eyes.

His phone started ringing.

He planned to ignore it. He knew it was Robin and he wasn’t quite ready to face her yet.

But he knew if he didn’t answer, she’d worry. Maybe dramatically call 911 to do a wellness check.

He didn’t want to put Eddie through all that.

He grabbed his phone and answered, letting his head rest against Eddie’s chest.

“Yeah?”

“Steve. Listen. I’m sorry about earlier, okay? I didn’t mean that. I’m just worried about you. I want you to have someone who makes you happy, but I want you to be safe and-“

“Robs, I know. I’m sorry I freaked out.”

Eddie’s hands were moving up and down his back slowly, adding pressure to his shoulders where he was most tense.

“Are you gonna be home soon?”

Steve resisted saying that he was home.

He realized he’d said it twice to Eddie; This felt like home. He’d never really had somewhere that felt like home. Even with Robin, he knew they were roommates because neither of them could afford rent on their own.

But here, he felt like he could safely recharge, relax, be himself, float away and find his way back. And he could do it all with Eddie.

“Yeah. I’ll head out soon.”

Robin was silent as Eddie started playing with the hem of Steve’s shirt.

“You could just stay. If you wanted. I mean I have your location and you’ll text me in the morning so I know you’re alive.”

Steve considered that this might be a test, that Robin was seeing if he’d give in easily and not explain anything else.

But Robin isn’t the type of friend to test him like that. She was never anything but honest and straightforward, never would expect him to make a choice like that to win her love. That’s just not who she was.

“I could stay tonight.”

Steve looked up at Eddie, who was smiling and nodding down at him, hands never stopping their comforting movements on his back.

“I’m gonna stay tonight.” Steve smiled into the phone as if Robin was able to see. “But tomorrow, I’m coming home after work and we’re having a long talk. We’re gonna order pizza and we’re gonna drink enough cheap wine to have the worst hangover ever on Wednesday morning. Okay?”

Robin let out a quiet chuckle. Good. Laughter is good.

“Okay, dingus. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“You got it, Robs.”

When Steve hung up the phone, Eddie pulled him tight against his chest, letting Steve find his place with his nose against his collarbone.

He breathed in his scent, smiling to himself at how quickly he relaxed into it.

“Sounds like things went well.”

“Mhm. Things’ll be good.”

Eddie kissed the top of his head.

“Let me clean up the dishes and then we can go to bed.”

“No, wanna stay here.”

“Here, in this chair?” Eddie snorted. “I don’t think either of us actually want that, sunshine.”

“Don’t wanna move.”

“How about I carry you?”

“Yes, please.”

For some reason, Steve didn’t exactly expect him to actually lift him in his arms and carry him. But he did.

He had him in his arms like he was a new bride being carried over the threshold, and Steve was blushing from his head to his toes.

Steve looked up at his face, taking in the way Eddie had a near-constant smirk when he was doing things like this. Like he was having fun and liked doing it.

Eddie dropped him in bed, laughing at the ‘oof’ Steve let out from the impact of hitting the mattress and pillows.

He stared down at Steve with that soft look he gave him before. Like Steve was actually making his life brighter, like it was a beautiful thing to have and know Steve.

No one has ever looked at him like that.

“Stevie.”

“Hm?”

“I really want to kiss you.”

Steve gulped.

“I really want you to kiss me.”

Eddie didn’t question it or wait, and his wet lips were against his with a passion Steve had never experienced in his life.

He forgot about everything except the way Eddie’s lips fit perfectly against his, slowly opening his own up so he could lick into his mouth.

He ran his tongue along Steve’s bottom lip, smiling into the kiss when Steve let out a loud moan.

Eddie’s hand was in his hair, tugging on the ends just enough to keep Steve present as his other hand ghosted down his side and squeezed his hip.

Steve could stay just like this forever and it wouldn’t be long enough.

He’d never have enough of Eddie touching him, kissing him, caring for him.

He wanted it always.

He let out another moan when Eddie’s teeth bit down on his bottom lip, sucking it between his teeth and lips like he was trying to eat him.

Steve would let him.

But just when he thought he was going to stay like this all night, Eddie pulled away, nipping at his bottom lip one more time before he separated from him completely and stood up.

“Gonna go clean up. Be a good boy for me and stay right here. No touching yourself.”

Steve hadn’t really thought about doing so until he watched Eddie walk away and glanced down to see that he was hard. Incredibly so.

Suddenly, his only focus was on getting relief from how hard he was. How had he gotten there from a kiss?

It was like every touch from Eddie was equal to 1000 touches from anyone else. If Eddie touched his cock, he was done for. He’d embarrass himself beyond belief.

Maybe if Steve didn’t think about it, it would go away and it’d be fine.

Maybe he could just give himself a little touch. Eddie wouldn’t know. It’s not like he was watching.

But Eddie said not to.

Steve had to listen to Eddie.

He could distantly hear Eddie washing dishes in the kitchen, dishes clanking around while the water ran from the faucet.

He could feel the heat of the sweatpants and hoodie he was wearing, causing him to break out in a sweat.

Eddie didn’t say he couldn’t take his clothes off. He just said he couldn’t touch himself.

So Steve removed the hoodie and sweatpants in record time, unable to focus on anything except the cool sheets under him and the hard length nearly poking out of his boxers.

He hoped Eddie would touch him when he got back. He couldn’t sleep like this.

Too on edge, too close to falling the wrong way off the cliff.

He didn’t even register when Eddie entered the room again, his thoughts stuck on how good it would feel to have Eddie’s hands on him again.

Then Eddie’s hands were on him again. They were cupping his cheeks and forcing him to make eye contact with him.

Eddie was shirtless already, straddling his lap.

Steve didn’t care how he got there, just that he was.

He couldn’t help the whine he let out when Eddie’s cock brushed against his.

Oh, he wasn’t wearing pants either.

Steve hoped this was going where he wanted it to.

“You look so beautiful like this, sweet thing. Like I could eat you right up,” Eddie said before leaning in to leave a trail of kisses down his neck.

He paused right where Steve knew his freckles were and let out a small laugh against his skin.

“These are the cutest things I’ve ever seen.”

Steve whined. He needed Eddie to kiss them, kiss him, kiss anywhere. He needed his lips on him every second of every day.

As if he could read his mind, Eddie gently kissed his freckles. Steve could feel his smile against his skin.

“Please kiss me,” he let out, needy whimper following his words.

“Am kissing you, sweet thing.”

And he was. Technically. But Steve needed to taste him again, needed their mouths connected so he could feel his breath in his own lungs, taking and giving oxygen Steve so desperately wanted to give and receive.

“Need you, please,” Steve added, as if that would make Eddie do anything else. “Please, please.”

Begging was not what he thought would happen tonight, but his mouth no longer had a filter as he felt Eddie’s hips roll against him.

The friction was almost too much.

Steve was going to cum. Right there in his boxers after barely making out and like, two barely there touches against his cock.

“Love hearing you beg,” Eddie said as he trailed his lips and tongue and teeth down Steve’s chest. He licked at one of his nipples, blowing cold air on it after. Steve shivered, but not from the cold.

“Feels so good,” Steve managed to get out.

He could tell he was becoming more incoherent, his moans getting louder despite Eddie hardly doing anything at all to him. He’d be embarrassed if he didn’t know how hard Eddie was above him.

Suddenly, Eddie’s lips were back on his own. He sighed into it, relief at being given what he wanted letting him relax further into the bed.

The relief only lasted for a moment, though.

Eddie was pulling away and laying down next to Steve.

No.

“No,” Steve said, turning his head to pout at him. “More.”

Eddie raised his eyebrows at him.

“That doesn’t sound very polite, Stevie. I can’t give you what you want if you don’t ask nicely,” Eddie sounded bored. Was he bored?

No, he wouldn’t have gone from interest to bored that quickly. Would he?

“Here’s what’s gonna happen. You listening?”

“Mhm.”

“Good boy. You’re gonna get on my lap and you’re gonna get yourself off. No hands.” Steve was already moving, but Eddie put his hand on his chest to hold him still. “No boxers. You use your safe word if it gets too much.”

Steve didn’t know how this could be too much, but he was too far gone to do anything but agree.

“Okay.”

Eddie removed his hand and didn’t stop Steve this time when he got up and straddled Eddie’s thighs, the reverse position they’d been in before giving Steve a head rush. He helped push Steve’s boxers off, holding him steady when his legs nearly gave out when he kicked them off.

Eddie didn’t touch him at first, letting Steve find the position that worked best for him and watching as he tried to find the perfect level of contact.

He couldn’t though.

“Oh, sweet thing, you can’t get it right can you?”

Steve whined and shook his head, feeling tears of frustration building behind his eyes.

“You want me to help you?”

“Please, yes, help,” Steve got out between pants.

Eddie’s hands were on his hips, warmth spreading from the place they touched Steve’s skin throughout his body. His grip was strong, nearly leaving fingerprint bruises in his skin. Steve wished he would.

“More.”

“More what?”

“Fingers. Harder.”

Finding the right words was hard. Steve was doing all he could to keep his eyes locked on Eddie’s face, vision going a bit blurry from the cloudiness in his head.

Eddie understood though.

His fingers gripped harder, and Steve knew he’d be done for soon regardless of the friction on his cock.

“You want help getting started, sweet thing?”

“Mhm. Mmm,” Steve was incoherent. He knew it, but he couldn’t do anything but let Eddie have full control.

Eddie used his strong grip to move Steve’s hips back and forth a few times, the feeling of Steve’s bare cock against Eddie’s clothed one nearly enough to send him over the edge right away.

He was moaning uncontrollably.

“I’m not doing it all for you,” Eddie said, letting go of Steve’s hips and watching as Steve stuttered in his movements. “C’mon. You were so desperate for it before.”

Steve didn’t think about how he was naked and Eddie wasn’t, how his dripping cock was getting Eddie’s boxers messy, how Eddie was smirking at him as he struggled to keep up the pace Eddie had started.

He only thought about how he had to get relief and make Eddie proud of him for doing what he asked.

Steve’s hips moved back and forth, rolling down every time he pushed forward so he could feel Eddie’s length against his own.

It was too much and not enough and Steve didn’t know how long he could keep this up.

Eddie was watching him, talking him through it, but not touching him.

“That’s it, sweet thing. Doing so good for me,” Eddie let out a moan when he started moving faster. “That’s it, sweetheart. Making me feel so fucking good.”

Steve wasn’t even registering his own pleasure anymore, only able to hear the way Eddie’s words were getting breathier, moans louder.

“Gonna cum for me? Want you to make me messy, sunshine. C’mon,” Eddie started tilting his hips up to meet Steve every time he rolled his hips down.

It was so much.

There was nothing but Eddie. His voice wrapped around him like a warm blanket as Steve felt the pull in his stomach letting him know he was close.

“Mm, Eddie, Eddie-“ Steve was babbling and he couldn’t stop. He didn’t care. He didn’t think Eddie did either. “Gonna. Gonna be good.”

Eddie let out a loud moan and sat up enough to kiss Steve’s lips.

Steve was done for.

He came so hard he almost couldn’t even feel it, the pleasure making his vision go black and his body go numb.

He could feel Eddie rut against him a few more times before he let out a groan.

He couldn’t open his eyes to see, but he knew Eddie must’ve finished too.

“So good, sunshine. Did so good for me, can’t believe I’m so lucky,” Eddie was whispering into his ear, soft breaths making Steve shiver against him.

Steve felt Eddie moving him so he was laying down in bed.

Then cold air shocked him into opening his eyes and letting out a pained whimper.

“Shhh, sweet thing. Just grabbing a washcloth. Gotta clean you up and take care of you, yeah? You did so good for me,” Eddie said as he pecked a kiss to his forehead.

Steve wasn’t quite floating now, but he recognized that he’d been on the cusp of it before Eddie walked away. He still wasn’t aware of most of what was going on, just that he’d never felt so good in his life and he hadn’t even had hands on him.

Whatever Eddie had done to take Steve apart was incredible.

When Eddie came back with the washcloth and gently wiped his stomach and chest, Steve tried to speak.

“Love that,” was all he was capable of, but it was a start. Eddie would get the gist of it.

“I’m glad. Loved doing that with you,” Eddie said softly as he got into bed next to Steve. He immediately pulled Steve on top of him, and Steve nearly gasped at Eddie being naked under him. “Feeling okay?”

Steve nodded against his chest.

He’d never felt better.

As he drifted to sleep to Eddie’s soft whispers, Steve thought about how he could possibly love someone so much so quickly.

Chapter 7

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[hermit-house]

I got bored and asked ChatGPT to describe the possible plot of Season 5 and wrap up the character arcs as if the Duffers were doing it. And to pay special attention to Mike and Will's "friendship".

And, holy shit, you have to read this! I laughed and screamed 👏😎

ChatGPT 👇

Creating the fifth season of Stranger Things is a challenging task, given the rich characters and plot lines accumulated over four seasons. Here's a possible plan that could logically conclude the main character arcs, in the style of the Duffer Brothers.

Main Concept of the Season:

Theme: The consequences of growing up, accepting one's identity, saying goodbye to the past, and the final battle for Hawkins.

Storylines and Character Arcs:

Will’s Return and Revelation of His True Nature:

At the end of Season 4, we see that Will still feels a connection to the Upside Down and Vecna. In Season 5, this connection becomes more intense, and Will starts seeing events occurring in the Upside Down, leading to troubling visions of an impending cataclysm.

Will realizes that his connection to the Upside Down is the key to defeating Vecna, but to do so, he must fully embrace this connection. This leads to an inner conflict: he fears becoming a puppet of the monster again but understands that without his involvement, they cannot win.

In the process, Will also continues to struggle with the realization of his sexual orientation and his feelings for Mike. These feelings cause him anxiety, especially considering that Mike is still connected to Eleven.

Gradually, through conversations with other characters, like Robin, Will finds the courage to confess his feelings to Mike, though he fears it might ruin their friendship.

Mike and the Conflict of Growing Up:

Mike faces the conflict between his childhood and the need to grow up. He feels that they are all drifting apart and tries to keep the group together.

His relationship with Eleven goes through trials. Ultimately, Mike realizes that his love for Eleven was an important part of his life, but their relationship can no longer remain the same. While he deeply cares for her, he begins to understand that their bond is more sibling-like than romantic.

At the same time, through a series of conversations and shared experiences, Mike starts to notice that his feelings for Will are more complicated than he thought. He realizes that Will has always been more important to him than he admitted, and that their friendship was always based on a deep emotional connection.

Mike becomes a pillar for Will, realizing that his role in this story is to be the one who unites the team and supports those in need.

Eleven and the Final Showdown:

Eleven continues to develop her powers, realizing that the key to defeating Vecna lies in uniting all her memories and experiences. She finds a way to use her pain and trauma to strengthen her abilities.

Eleven also helps Will confront his fears, and together they find a way to use his connection to the Upside Down as a weapon against Vecna.

In the final episode, Eleven and Vecna face off in a decisive battle, in which all the main characters participate. At the moment when victory seems impossible, Will and Eleven combine their powers to deliver the final blow.

Max, Lucas, and Saving Hawkins:

Max remains in a coma after the events of Season 4, but her consciousness is trapped in the Upside Down. Lucas and the other friends search for a way to bring her back, seeking help from new allies and old enemies.

Eventually, they find a way to enter the Upside Down and free Max, which becomes an important step toward defeating Vecna.

The Final Battle and Aftermath:

The final battle takes place in Hawkins itself, where the worlds of reality and the Upside Down begin to merge, threatening to destroy the town.

Each of the heroes contributes to the victory: Dustin, Lucas, Nancy, Jonathan, Robin, and others find their own ways to help in the fight. Each character's role will highlight the importance of their individual qualities and their unity as a team.

The finale shows that they can defeat Vecna, but it requires sacrifices. Perhaps one of the key characters (like Hopper or Joyce) sacrifices themselves to save the others.

Epilogue and Closing of the Arcs:

After the victory, Hawkins returns to normal life, but the heroes realize that their childhood is definitively over.

Will and Mike begin to explore their new relationship. They decide to take it slow, understanding that their journey is just beginning and that they need time to sort out their feelings.

Eleven and the other heroes begin a new life, leaving the past behind but with the assurance that their friendship and shared experiences will always stay with them.

At the end of the season, the audience sees the heroes going their separate ways but remaining close friends despite all the changes.

Conclusion:

Season 5 will be the culmination of the entire story that began in a small town and turned into an epic battle for the world. The heroes will face the consequences of their actions, complete their internal arcs, and take on new roles in life, leaving behind their childhood and past fears.

[portraitofalady]

Reasons why Steve won't die in S5

I don't think Steve will die in S5. Here's why:

Dustin has already lost Eddie-who was his other big brother role model alongside Steve. Steve is, arguably, closer to Dustin and thus, would hurt Dustin even more than Eddie to lose him. Unless the Duffers are looking to push Dustin to the brink-they're not going to kill his other role model.

Steve is a main character. For four seasons, the Duffers have never killed off a main character. Ever. They're averse to it and have said in interviews that it's not that kind of show.

It would be really cheap, lazy writing to kill Steve off in the final season. It would be like saying, "Oh, look, we know he's the fan favourite character and one of the reasons you all keep watching-so we'll keep him around for the bulk of the show to ensure you keep tuning in and then, in the final season, we'll kill him off to break your hearts." Go back to point two-and it doesn't make sense for the Duffers to do that.

The Duffers have sourced their inspiration from the 80s movies and shows. In those movies and shows, the good guys win.

It would, again, be a really lazy and cheap way to end the love triangle. One, I think the love triangle resolved at the end of S4 when Nancy went up and hugged Jonathan, and Steve walked away shaking his head. I think that was Steve's acceptance that she would never come back to him. Two, there are other ways to end a love triangle that don't include one third of it dying.

I honestly don't see them killing off any main characters in the final season-perhaps El-but that's just because it's clear that Millie Bobby Brown is done with the show and ready to move on-so they may give her that (it would suck, if they did) to close off any possibility of a return for a spin-off. They haven't done it in the past four seasons-so why would they do it in the final one? They're not just suddenly going to go from "We don't kill any main characters!" to "Now, Hawkins is Westeros and anyone is for the chop!" Again-it's lazy and cheap to switch up the formula that has worked for four seasons for the final season. People don't watch Stranger Things to watch the main characters get killed-it's expected, at this point, that they won't be. People that do watch for that reason-are watching the wrong show. Which is why there are so many complaints at the lack of character death because everyone's brains have been addled by Game of Thrones and people think for a show to be good and to have merit they need to be killing an MC every episode. ST isn't that show-so they're not killing their fan-favourite MC in the final season and if they do kill an MC-there's no more reason why it would be Steve as opposed to Robin, Nancy, Jonathan, Will, or any of the other mains.

[tillystealeaves]

Steddie Breakup Fic- Interlude #1

YIKES I really did not intend to take two whole months to post the next part of this. But the rest is coming soon!!!!

Start with Part 1 Read on AO3

After all that had happened in Hawkins in the past several years, Robin’s parents had assumed that she would be eager to leave and go off to college. As much as they loved their only child, they had secretly also been looking forward to her departure; Robin too often seemed to find herself at the center of the strange goings-on of Hawkins. But in the summer of ’86, Robin had told her parents that she wasn’t going to be leaving, at least not right away.

She had been in touch with the admissions team at the University of Chicago and explained to them that after a traumatic incident that past spring, she wished to defer her enrollment for a year. Robin showed her parents the very kind letter that she had received from the head of the Linguistics department, telling Robin to take the time that she needed and assuring her that her spot at the school would be waiting for her next fall.

This year, in addition to knocking out one or two prerequisite courses at the local community college, Robin was working yet another retail job with Steve Harrington. The Buckleys liked Steve well enough, but couldn’t quite understand the level of attachment that their daughter clearly felt towards him. Still, he was polite, he helped Mrs. Buckley with the dishes when he came for dinner, and he often brought dessert that he had baked himself. Even more importantly, he always conducted himself in a way that made them feel comfortable with him spending time with their daughter. Of course they’d heard the rumors that had started years ago- that Steven Harrington, much like Richard Harrington before him, was driving a different girl around in his big fancy car each week. But the Buckleys had only ever seen Steve around town with the group of teens that he inexplicably claimed to babysit. The only young lady Steve seemed to spend time with- other than occasionally Nancy Wheeler, who was the older sister of the kids he watched- was Robin. And though they’d caught Steve curled around Robin on the couch (and they suspected he’d crawled into her bedroom window on several occasions) the relationship truly did seem to be as “Platonic with a Capital P” as their daughter insisted.

Unfortunately, this bewildered acceptance did not in any way extend to Eddie Munson. Of course, the Buckleys didn’t believe that fantasy games or loud and angry-sounding music meant that someone was a satanic fiend. They didn’t even believe that the Munson boy had killed any of those teens; they’d seen him giving rides to Steve’s kids in his van and Steve would certainly never allow someone dangerous to do that. From afar, he seemed to be a genuinely kindhearted person.

But it was indeed common knowledge that Eddie Munson sold drugs, and they didn’t want Robin anywhere near that kind of a situation. In addition, most of the residents of Hawkins were considerably less convinced by the official story of what was now being called the Creel Killings. Munson, whether by his own fault or not, was a target for the uglier side of small town life. The Buckleys were concerned that association with Eddie might make Robin a target of their anger- or that small town rumors might spill outside the city limits and harm Robin’s reputation going forward.

With all of this in mind, Eddie suppressed the urge to drive over to the Buckley’s house at 7am and knock on the door demanding to see Robin.

He hadn’t made any attempt to talk to her after leaving Steve’s house the previous night. All he could bring himself to do was drive around aimlessly until he was sure Wayne had left for work, go home, and cry while replaying the conversation with Steve a thousand times in his head.

It didn’t make sense. Eddie understood the words that Steve had spoken, but he couldn’t make them fit with everything he knew about Steve- and everything they’d shared since their first kiss late in May, on the day that Eddie had finally earned his high school diploma.

Steve loved. It was the most true thing about him. He loved Robin and he loved the kids and he loved his perpetually absent parents even though they didn’t deserve it.

He loved Eddie. That had been a surprise at first, finding Steve sitting at his bedside in the hospital. Steve, offering to help Eddie as his body slowly healed from dozens of bat bites. Steve, bringing food to Eddie and Wayne’s new trailer. At first Eddie thought it was just gratitude, a “thanks-for-not-letting-Dustin-die”. Then he realized that Steve- that the whole party- had simply absorbed him into their bizarre little monster fighting family. And then it became clear that it was more than just trauma bonding; that Steve truly liked Eddie, wanted to help him just because it made Steve happy to see him happy, enjoyed spending time with him.

And then and then and then it was something else entirely. Still love, but now it was warmer. Kisses and hands held during movie nights. Their same inside jokes now paired with soft touches. Love. Steve’s love.

Steve’s love was a brilliant thing and Eddie had felt so honored to receive it. He hadn’t had much (any) experience with relationships- being gay in a small town will do that- but he was determined to love Steve well in return, and to make sure Steve knew his love was appreciated.

Eddie had heard the story of Steve and Nancy- from both Steve and from Nancy. They’d come to an understanding now; a friendship built on mutual respect. But to hear Steve tell it, he’d failed Nancy when she needed him, he’d been too clingy while at the same time not being “real enough” (whatever that meant), he’d let her down by being too much and not enough all at once. The version that Nancy told seemed more likely to Eddie- that they’d been kids faced with unspeakable trauma that they’d processed in very different ways. That they wanted different things from life and it never would have lasted, even if Barb hadn’t died in Steve’s pool. But Nancy was sure to include in her retelling that Steve’s love was brilliant- even if it hadn’t ultimately been what she wanted, she knew it was so powerful and pure and she hoped more than anything that Steve found someone who would appreciate it and return it as he deserved to have his love returned.

When Nancy told Eddie that last part, she’d given him a very pointed look and then kicked him in the shin while smirking. Eddie had kicked her right back, trying to hide his blush. It was two weeks before graduation and Eddie had definitely noticed the subtle shift in Steve’s love. Of course, nothing had had to shift for Eddie at all. The Corroded Coffin boys were all too aware of Eddie’s years-long unfortunate crush on Steve Harrington. The first time he saw Harrington pick up the newest Hellfire members from school, he’d been confused and a little wary. But then the kids had rushed to him and Henderson had done some (very nerdy and not at all king-like) handshake with him and suddenly his crush didn’t seem so unfortunate. Or at least, it was unfortunate for a different reason.

He'd been delighted when Steve had finally taken the leap and kissed him after the joint graduation party that had been held at the Harringtons’ perpetually empty house. After that, things between them seemed to fall together naturally. Eddie loved being loved by Steve, and he loved being able to give Steve love in return. It was so good- good in a way that Eddie of a year ago could never have imagined he would ever be able to find in Hawkins.

Except… Eddie had been wrong?

For the thousandth time, he replayed Steve’s words in his head. Sometimes, one person in a relationship just expects more out of it than what it is. Eddie had heard the rumors about King Steve Harrington, always able to score any girl he wanted, never likely to be seen with the same one for more than a week or two. Was that it? Was that all Eddie was? The flavor of the week? But that didn’t make sense. It had been more than a week- it had been nearly five months. And Steve wasn’t like that, not really.

What, then? If it wasn’t Steve, then it must be Eddie. Of course, Eddie had long held the belief that he wasn’t the type of guy someone would stick around for. Eddie was good for a quick hookup in that gay bar in Indy he visited sometimes. Or maybe if he ever made it big with Corroded Coffin, a fan might want to accompany him back to his hotel room. Eddie wasn’t a person that someone wanted to keep forever.

But Steve had. In every kiss, every shared secret, every daydream about moving to Chicago and sharing an apartment, making sure there was space for Robin to stay over a few nights a week. Steve had made Eddie feel, since their first kiss, that he planned to hold on to Eddie forever. Or maybe that was all just in Eddie’s mind? Maybe he’d wanted it so much that he had convinced himself of something that wasn’t there? But no. Wayne saw it, and had commented many times about how happy they both seemed. Nancy saw it. Robin saw it.

And yet she hadn’t.

Steve said that he’d talked to Robin about this, that Robin had told him to confront Eddie about their apparent irreconcilable differences. Had she known this whole time that Steve wasn’t nearly as interested in Eddie as Eddie was in him? Why hadn’t she said something to Eddie, told him to stop making a fool of himself around her best friend?

Eddie couldn’t understand. After thinking about it all night long, he’d only managed to find more questions to ask, not come up with anything that made the past five months match up with Steve’s words from the night before.

And so here he stood outside of the Buckley home, after Mr. and Mrs. Buckley had left for work but well before Robin’s 2pm shift. Eddie was glad that he knew this detail of her schedule, even though the reason for him knowing was yet another twist of the knife in his heart. Robin had offered last week to work this night’s closing shift at the arcade so that Eddie could take Steve to watch the Orionid meteor shower. Steve loved driving away from the lights of Hawkins and watching the stars. Eddie had been planning to pack a picnic in the back of his van and- no, he couldn’t start thinking about that now.

Eddie took a deep breath and knocked on Robin’s door. She answered quickly, as though she were expecting him, but the look on her face said that she very much was not.

“You’re not Steve,” she stated unnecessarily. She was tense, clearly annoyed at his presence. Did she hate him? Had Eddie missed the signs? Had Steve’s soulmate told him that Eddie wasn’t good enough for him?

“Um… nope, not Steve,” Eddie began awkwardly. Now that he was here, he didn’t know how to start this conversation.

Robin solved this problem for him by looking anxiously over his shoulder and saying, “Okay, well you need to go. You can’t be here right now. Steve is coming over to talk and eat a whole bunch of junk food and I’m probably going to end up having to call out of work and he can’t find me standing here fraternizing with the enemy.”

What? Robin sounded like she was planning the classic Best Friend Interventions for when a friend gets their heart broken. But Steve was the one who dumped Eddie. Eddie’s was the heart that got broken. Why did Steve have to sadly eat junk food over the fact that he didn’t really like Eddie all that much? And… enemy?

That last thought managed to force its way from the swirling mess that was Eddie’s mind and out his mouth. “I’m the enemy now? Bob, what did I do?”

“Don’t ‘Bob’ me!” Robin snapped. Okay, then. They’d gone to the point of not-friendship where nicknames were no longer allowed. Eddie fought back the sudden urge to start crying all over again.

In front of him, Robin took a deep, steadying breath. “Sorry. That was harsh; you’re not the enemy. I’m just… disappointed. Sad. I don’t know. But you can’t be here when Steve gets here, okay?”

“Okay,” Eddie agreed. No matter how hurt and confused he was, he didn’t want to cause Steve any pain. Robin seemed sure that finding Eddie on her doorstep would hurt Steve, so Eddie would get himself gone. But before he left, he had to at least try to understand. “Can I just- Why did you tell Steve to dump me?”

Now, Robin looked actually angry. Eddie wondered if he should run while he had the chance. (Underneath his confusion, he found himself thinking how glad he was that Steve had a friend like Robin in his corner.) “Do not turn this around on Steve- or on me. I spent weeks building him up, giving him the courage to talk to you about things in your relationship that were worrying him. I vouched for you- I told him you would listen. Instead, I get a phone call last night from a crying Steve who says- and I quote- ‘It’s over. We’re not together anymore. I can’t talk about it tonight but I’m going to come see you before work,’ and then hangs up as soon as I agree.”

So Robin hadn’t thought that Eddie was no good. Well, that was some comfort at least. But it still left Eddie with the horrible truth that when given the opportunity to talk through issues in their relationship, Steve had decided that Eddie just wasn’t worth it. “We didn’t talk about anything,” Eddie whispered, trying desperately not to let Robin hear how his voice was breaking. “He just… told me that we were looking for different things in our relationship and that he wanted to end it now before we ended up hating each other.”

“DINGUS!”

Robin’s shout startled Eddie. He quickly looked behind him, checking to see if Steve had arrived. He hadn’t. Eddie turned back to Robin, only to find her tugging at her hair in frustration. “Oh my god, Dingus why? You suck. Every tally on the You Suck board forever, you suck!” She suddenly focused her attention back to Eddie, who was now feeling more confused than ever. “Do you love him?”

“Wh- what?” Eddie stammered. How did Steve keep up with Robin’s brain?

“Do. You. Love. Steve?” Robin repeated, clearly enunciating each word. “There’s no wrong answer but you have to tell me the truth.”

“Of course I do.” And here were the tears again. Robin definitely wasn’t angry at him anymore, but Eddie was still so confused and so hurt. One thing he knew for sure, though, was this. “Bob, I love him so much. I tried last night- I tried to get him to tell me what I was doing wrong, how I could be a better boyfriend to him. He didn’t want to hear it. Just said he didn’t love me enough.”

“He didn’t say that,” interjected Robin. Her voice was calm, assured. “I absolutely know that Steve did not say that he doesn’t love you enough to stay with you.”

“Well no,” Eddie conceded. “But he said when one person wants more out of a relationship, someone ends up with their heart broken and someone ends up resenting the other person’s love.”

Robin stared at him expectantly. Clearly she wanted him to draw some conclusion from this but it was the same as what he’d said in the first place. Steve didn’t love him enough to stay. The silence stretched on until Eddie felt compelled to fill it. “He dumped me while we’re still happy so that he doesn’t end up resenting or hating me.”

“He absolutely did not.” Again, Robin sounded so sure. What had she pieced together that he hadn’t?

None of what was happening made sense. But Robin had somehow made sense of it. Eddie took a deep breath and tried once again to understand why his relationship had dissolved overnight, now with the added clues of this conversation with Robin.

Steve’s love was brilliant and intense, steady even when its recipient didn’t appreciate it. Steve had been trying to work up the courage to talk to Eddie about their relationship. Steve had ended things because he was worried that they weren’t on the same page.

No, he couldn’t.

“Does…” Eddie’s voice sounded so small, even to his own ears. He cleared his throat but it didn’t help. Panic and shame were choking him and he was sure that he’d never be able to draw breath again. He didn’t deserve to. “Robin, does he think I don’t love him? Oh my god, does he think I’m going to get bored and resent him?”

“As I said,” Robin grumbled, “Dingus.”

“How did I mess this up? Shit, I thought I was doing it right!” Eddie clutched at his hair, pulling at it as though the pressure would stop the tears that were now pouring down his face. “I swear, Robin, I love him and I really thought I was showing him that.”

Robin grabbed Eddie gently by the wrists, not pulling his hands away from his hair, but simply pausing his tugging. “I know. Eddie, you were showing it. Everyone that’s ever seen you two for five minutes saw it; you guys are frankly gross.” Eddie felt himself smiling weakly at that. They were and he knew it. He loved it. He felt his smile vanish. He thought Steve had known it too. “This is a Steve problem. And it’s why I told him to talk to you. Talk. With whole sentences. Weeks ago.”

Eddie nodded. But even though it was Steve’s own insecurities that had caused this problem, Steve and Eddie were a team- at least Eddie hoped they still were. “How can I help fix it?”

“You have a date tonight, right? The meteor shower?”

“I mean… no, because Steve pretty firmly dumped me last night,” Eddie replied, trying not to snap at Robin. She spoke Steve better than anyone; she could help.

“Right, okay. Go get ready. Just pretend you’re not dumped and plan the date that I know you already have planned. Expect Steve like an hour earlier than he was supposed to come. Now seriously, shoo, because he really is going to be here any second!”

And with that, Eddie was dismissed.

=====================

Hope you enjoyed this! There's one more interlude and then the conclusion.

Also this story takes place on October 21st, 1986, and this is the meteor shower they're going to watch.

Read the next part: Interlude 2

[ashwhowrites]

Random fic that went through my head when this song came on

Past steve x reader

Eddie x reader

never proofread

~~~

Steve may have been the king, but he was never good at relationships. He had Nancy on his arm for years and somehow wasn't good enough to keep her around. Steve had no idea how to be better for her because she never asked for anything.

After they broke up, he met Y/N. A very sweet and bubbly girl. A smile always on her face and a helping hand. But she also was Nancy's ex-friend. Some fight between them left their friendship in the past. Steve thought if he moved on to Y/N, Nancy would have to notice.

So Steve used Y/N's kindness for his own selfish reasons. Stringing the girl along, kissing her hard when Nancy would look over. Bringing Y/N to all the places he knew Nancy would run into them.

But Y/N began to notice he never showed her love. She loved flowers, and he never thought to buy her any. She'd buy him flowers for every month they were together, but received nothing in return.

She was one year behind Steve, he already graduated and went to prom. But her senior prom was coming up and she wanted nothing more than Steve to ask her. But she had a feeling since it wasn't his prom, he wouldn't bother to ask. So she swallowed her dream of being asked to prom and asked him herself.

Even though he said yes, her prom wasn't anything that she dreamed of. He didn't bring her flowers, match her dress, and refused to dance during the whole thing. She broke it off with him that night.

During the summer she worked at the ice cream shop with Robin. Steve left to work at the video store, so she took the open spot.

That's where she met Eddie, the boy who stole her heart instantly when he ordered four different flavors on one single cone.

They talked over the summer, Steve far away in the past as she moved on to the hyper boy who tried every single flavor in the shop. Every day adding another scoop, wanting to see how much the cone could handle before it all fell over.

Once the school year started, she attend college nearby as he went through senior year, again. She was back to being happy.

Steve watched their relationship from the sidelines. He didn't think she meant much to him, that their breakup would be something he could easily brush off. But Eddie was a painful reminder Steve could not have been more wrong.

Steve couldn't help but realize how sweet and giving she was. She'd buy Steve flowers and his favorite candy just because. But watching as she handed Eddie a chocolate bar and a kiss on his nose as she sat in his van, hurt Steve more than he thought it would. The way Eddie's face lit up as he took the gifts. Never once shrugging her off or looking ashamed.

Steve struggled with his pride. Accepting "girly" gifts was a blow to his ego. But it didn't seem like Eddie had that problem.

~~~

Steve watched as Eddie pulled flowers from behind his back, Y/N squealing in excitement once her eyes met the assortment of colors. The way she laughed and threw her arms around Eddie. He smiled as hugged her back. The flowers were still in his grip. Her hands excitedly took the flowers in her hands, nose-diving in to smell the roses.

He's never seen her smile that big with him before. She always expressed her love for flowers, but Steve never cared enough. Now he wished he did. He wished he took the time to treat her the way she deserved.

~~~

Weeks and weeks of running into the couple were driving Steve mad. It was like he couldn't escape them and all he saw was everything Steve should have done when he was her man.

To busy his mind he ran back to Nancy. Falling into the comfort of something he already knew.

~~~

It was prom once again, Nancy volunteered to help so she dragged Steve along. Steve watched all the couples dancing and drinking punch.

Steve worked the punch table as Nancy worked the food table on the other side. So he was stuck here with no one to talk to.

"Hi stranger," Y/N smiled, reaching to grab two cups of punch.

Her smile felt like salt in the wound. A skull ring rested on her finger, and he knew exactly who it belonged to. He had no reason to be so aggressive but he couldn't help but let some words slip.

"Really? Prom?" He scoffed, eyeing her beautiful dress and perfect hair.

"You are here too." She pointed out

"Yeah working, not the date to a loser that can't graduate" Steve argued back.

"He's not a loser. He's a gentleman and knows how to treat a girl. Something you'll never know how to do. And you are only here to get in Nancy's dress, you are so see-through." She snapped, rolling her eyes as she felt the annoyance filling her body.

"Oh baby, don't be so jealous." He smirked, leaning forward on the table, closer to her.

She felt herself laughing. Her hands were occupied with the punch as she leaned closer to him as well.

"Jealous? Of what? A boy that can't ever show his love for anyone but himself?" She spat at him, her eyes dark as she glared over him.

"Enjoy prom with your freak," Steve said through his clenched teeth.

"At least this time, I'll get to dance at prom." She smiled bitterly, happily walking towards Eddie. A real smile on her face as they sipped on their punch.

And she didn't lie. He watched as Eddie spun her around the dance floor. Neither cared about anyone around them.

All she wanted was flowers and to dance.

She got the flowers and she got the dance, just not from him.

tags!

@bmunson86 @mxcheese @ladymunson @michaelfuckinglangdon @z0mbie-blah @biittersweet @mirrorsstuff @slightlyvicked @micheledawn1975 @ago-godance @magnificantmermaid @tlclick73 @hargrovesswifee @cityofidek @manyfandomsfanvergent @silky-luxe @lokiofasgard616 @loving-and-dreaming @eddiemunsonsbitch69 @thegemaqua @ashlynnkennedy @strangerthingsstories5255 @harringt8ns @pleasinghellfire @whoscamila

[turvi]

Like Mother, Like Son

Severus Snape x Fem! Reader

Summary: A slice of life in the life of Severus Snape.

A/N: I had this inspiration after watching Modern Family. So hi five who watches it.

Severus had two lovely children. Clementine and Aiden. Their names suited well to their personalities. While Clementine has taken after Severus, Aiden has taken after his mother and while he loves his children to the core the latter can be a bit chaotic. Like his mother.

"Hey" Y/n climbed down the stairs to find Severus and Clementine sitting in front of the fireplace enjoying the morning peace. "Good morning, what are you reading Clem?"

Clementine gave her a warm smile "Good Morning Mother, I am reading Nancy Drew"

"Hmm are you enjoying it"

"Yes, mama thank you so much for gifting me this book I love it so much."Y/n gave her a loving smile.

Severus couldn't help but blush. She looked as lovely as the day they met. She settled herself on the arm of the couch Severus was sitting on.

"Where is my good morning?" he asked her raising his eyebrows.

She giggled as she kissed him promptly on his "Good Morning my love" she said with such love Severus was thankful he was sitting as his knees got weak at her loving voice.

"I am still here" Clementine reminded her eyes still on her book.

"Which reminds me where is our little troublemaker" he smirked at his wife.

"He is not a troublemaker" Y/n gasped. As soon as she finished her sentence the boy in question quickly made himself known.

"Are you sure he was not adopted?" Clementine asked

"GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!" Aidan yelled interrupting Clementine and quickly made his way downstairs.

"Aidan please be careful on the stairs you will get hurt," Severus said sternly giving a look to Y/n "See what I meant?"

"Sorry Papa" he quickly settled himself on Severus' other lap and gave a kiss on his cheek.

"Aww see he is so adorable and tell Papa how you are becoming responsible" Y/n cooed as Aidan preened

"Papa today I made my own bed," Aiden said with such a big smile that Severus had to bite his cheek to let his smile spread.

Aidan quickly got up from Severus' lap and ran towards his room.

"Careful on the steps" Severus reminded him.

Y/n couldn't stop looking at her husband she always knew he would make a great father and while she accepts they can be a handful he has always been patient with them. Severus starts blushing once he realizes Y/n's gaze on him

"You are staring at me" he smirked watching Y/n blush at his words

"I am just happy at the fact that you are happy" she softly smiled at him.

He caressed her back gently "I am," he said smiling lovingly at her.

"Ma I am going to explode some color-filled ballons on neighbors will you join me?" he asked Y/n wide-eyed

"Yes," she replied to him instantly getting. Giggles escape them as they leave their humble abode.

"Huh, I guess that answers my question" Clementine sighed going back to her reading.

"I am glad you took after me" Severus smiles sweetly at his daughter.

"I kind of want to watch them," She said finally closing her book

"Go, the more the merrier" he watched as she left quickly to join her brother and mother.

Severus went to the window to watch Y/n and the children fill the water balloons. Clementine finally decided to join them instead of watching.

Severus is happy with his family forgetting his past was not easy but creating a happy future was what Severus was looking forward to.

[dinitride-art]

Mike Wheeler in Stranger Things: Identity

Okay, so I know that generally- and especially after season four- what seems to be the most common interpretation of Mike as a queer character, is that he’s repressing his sexuality throughout the entire series. I would like to counter that argument with one that suggests Mike is aware of his feelings for Will on a conscious level, and while he has repressed his identity prior to season four, he is now past the point of being able to repress his identity and his feelings for Will. To fully analyze Mike’s awareness of his identity, I will be exploring his repression and denial as a result of societal pressures as seen through the journey from season one through three, and the acceptance and attempted expression of his identity in season four.

Mike Wheeler in Season One of Stranger Things (Society)

While Will is missing, and while the Party is trying to figure out what to do with El, Mike is continually targeted by Troy. More specifically, Troy calls Will gay to torment Mike. Lucas and Dustin aren’t targeted in the same way nor do they have the same reactions as Mike. Lucas and Dustin aren’t the ones to push Troy when he’s making fun of Will in the gym, Mike is. We also see that Mike is somewhat shameful about what Troy has been doing. Troy calls Will slurs and when Mike tries to walk away, as the one being targeted by Troy, he’s tripped and slams his chin into a rock on the ground. He lies to El at first about the scrape on his chin because he doesn’t want her to know what happened. He doesn’t want her to know about what Troy is saying to him. Mike is bullied in season one for Will being perceived as queer. This implies that Mike is also perceived as queer by Troy but unlike Will, is bullied indirectly. 

Bullying isn't the only aspect of season one that implies that Mike is experiencing societal pressure to conform; Both Dustin and Lucas suggest that Mike likes El. Mike denies this at first. What we see as an audience suggests that Mike’s feelings about El are different from Lucas and Dustin’s but not in the way that the characters are interpreting them. In episode two when El starts to change in front of the boys- because she doesn’t know any reason not to- Lucas and Dustin have very charged reactions. They are shocked and express that this is not a normal thing to do. Their reactions indicate that Lucas and Dustin have knowledge of why this situation isn’t normal, and that they both abide by and fit into that aspect of society. Mike’s reaction is very different. He’s annoyed by Lucas and Dustin’s reactions and quickly finds a solution to the problem. Mike knows why this situation is unacceptable, but because it doesn’t apply to him he is able to seem far more mature about handling it than his friends are. Mike knows how he is supposed to fit into society but his actions set him apart from those who actually do.

The start of Mike and El’s romantic relationship comes after Lucas and Dustin suggest it to Mike. They are telling Mike what is normal and now he is able to match his actions to their perceptions. This idea of what’s normal, liking El, is furthered by Nancy asking Mike if he likes El towards the end of the season when they’ve all met up at the school. Mike asks El if she wants to go to the Snow Ball with him, and then he kisses her. These aren’t unique actions. They abide perfectly by society's acceptable standards of romantic relationships, and what Mike is aware is acceptable, but there is little substance behind them. This is however, a shift from the beginning of the season where Mike’s knowledge of society contrasted his actions within it. After being told that being queer and not abiding by society will get you hurt or killed, and being pressured by close friends and family into liking El, Mike has started to actively repress his identity. His knowledge of what is socially acceptable is now driving his actions.

In season one Mike Wheeler is told that it is dangerous to reject society, and he is told that by people who hurt him for it and people he is close to. At twelve, Mike isn’t aware of his identity but he is made aware of the fact that it is unacceptable to be queer, or to make any action that suggests queerness in any way. Mike kisses El not only because it is what he has been told he is supposed to do, but because he has also been told that being perceived as anything else is dangerous. Mike’s journey with forced conformity and his identity starts in season one because that is the season where he is threatened for any action that society perceives as queer and where he learns to match his actions to what society deems acceptable. 

Mike Wheeler in Season Two of Stranger Things (Repression)

Max Mayfield, Trauma and Identity, and Mike’s Response in Relation to Both (Season Two)

As Mike has begun to repress his identity, his anger towards Max is a direct result of his own internal conflict. Since Mike experienced many traumatic events in season one, his internal conflict cannot be wholly attributed to the repression of his identity. Mike’s denial of El’s death and his guilt surrounding it, Will’s disappearance, being chased by government agents: all of these things have an impact on Mike and his actions as a character. He is both traumatized by those events, and his experience with Troy and the resulting repression of his identity. When considering his reaction to Max it’s important to view the entirety of Mike’s experiences as a character to better understand what his actions mean and where they’re coming from. Mike’s decisions are impacted by both his identity and his experiences because of it and outside of it. I would first like to consider his reaction to Max through the lens of his experiences in season one, outside of his identity, to create a better understanding of how that trauma impacts his character differently than the repression of his identity. 

In season one, Mike and Joyce Byers had similar reactions and experiences as a result of Will going missing. They were both doubted and experienced pushback upon telling others that they believed Will was still alive. Will’s disappearance affected them differently than others that knew Will. Mike’s response to Will going missing is emphasized when Dustin, Lucas and him are questioned by Hopper at school, and when they are at the hospital. In both those situations Mike has a different action than Dustin and Lucas. While Dustin and Lucas were arguing, Mike was sitting silently on the couch. At the hospital we see the same situation where Lucas and Dustin have fallen asleep contrasting Mike who is still awake and waiting. Mike having a different response than his friends to Will’s disappearance is indicative of both a different relationship between Mike and Will, and different future reactions from Lucas and Dustin as a result of differing trauma. El’s introduction to the party in season one was met with pushback from Lucas and Dustin, contrasting Mike’s immediate acceptance of her. When Dustin, Lucas and Mike saw her die in front of them, this would have a different effect on Mike because like Mike’s relationship with Will, his relationship with El is emphasized to be different from Lucas and Dustin’s relationship with her. Mike does not have the same experiences as Lucas and Dustin, causing his actions and reactions and impact of trauma on them to differ from theirs.

Lucas and Dustin have immediate positive reactions to Max’s introduction juxtaposing Mike and Will who are not interested in Max. Will, unlike Mike, does eventually accept Max into the Party. Considering that Mike and Will’s initial reactions to Max were the same, one can infer that there is a commonality in their characters, mainly their sexual identities, that sets them apart from Lucas and Dustin. However, Mike’s actions towards and in response to Max change and Will’s stay the same, one can also infer that Mike’s adverse feelings towards Max are a result of something other than his internal conflict in repressing his identity. 

Max Mayfield’s introduction is both as a new character and as a love interest. Mike and Will’s initial reactions are different from Lucas and Dustin’s because of their lack of romantic interest in Max. Will eventually accepts Max into the Party because unlike Mike, his pushback to Max is almost entirely because of his identity. Mike does not accept Max as a friend because of his experiences in season one that differ from Lucas, Dustin and Will’s. Will disappearing and continuing to have problems, and El dying have caused Mike to be adverse to trusting new people. Part of Mike’s issues with Max are because of his trauma surrounding losing people he cares about. That isn’t to say that his struggles with his identity and subsequent repression do not also affect his feelings and actions towards Max. Mike’s adverse feelings towards Max are a result of trauma and his identity. 

As Mike has begun to repress his identity due to his experiences in season one, his negative response to Max makes sense not only as a result of losing Will and El, but as a response to undeniable proof of being different from Dustin and Lucas. Mike doesn’t like Max like they do, and while Will doesn’t either, Mike's focus is primarily on conforming to society himself. Dustin and Lucas like Max immediately and their reactions to Max contrast both Mike’s reactions to Max, and his feelings towards El. Mike doesn’t like Max, romantically or otherwise, because her presence is a constant attack on his repression. He’s different from Lucas and Dustin. He doesn’t like the new girl at school, and that’s a problem because not liking Max like Lucas and Dustin is too close to what he’s repressing; he doesn’t like girls at all. 

Will Byers, High Stress Situations and Denial (Season Two)

In high stress situations Mike’s feelings take precedence over his repression. Will’s possession is a high stress situation that causes Mike’s actions to reflect his feelings rather than what he knows to be socially acceptable. He holds Will’s hand when Will’s scared, and sleeps at his bedside in the lab. When Mike is not given time to make an informed decision about his actions, they tend to be actions that are not socially acceptable. The contrast between how Mike acts with Will at the Byers house and in the lab, and at the SnowBall, shows us that Mike’s actions change when they are not forced to be instinctual. Mike doesn’t have time to think about placing his hand over Will’s, or reaching out to him when he’s in danger because the situation does not give him time to consider the societal implications and or pushback to those actions. However, at the SnowBall, Mike does have time to implement societal implications into his reasoning, which is why he encourages Will to dance with a girl, and why he dances with El when she shows up. Season one and season two end with Mike in very similar places in terms of the repression of his identity: Mike, El and the SnowBall, and Mike kissing El. Mike and El’s relationship and Mike’s response to El has remained the same, but there have been developments in Mike’s response to Will.

If Lucas and Dustin liking Max is a threat to Mike’s repression of his identity, then Will dancing with a girl has a similar effect. Mike and Dustin stare at Will dancing with a girl and Max dancing with Lucas, respectively. Unlike when Max was introduced, Mike doesn’t push back against the new girl, he encourages Will to dance with her because this is not the same as Lucas and Dustin liking Max. Will not dancing with a girl would be more of a problem because of Mike’s feelings for Will. As he is repressing those feelings, he needs to push Will away from him. Until the Snow Ball, Mike has not made any decisions that distanced him from Will because Mike did not have any reason to. Prior to the end of season two, Mike was not aware that his actions towards Will were socially unacceptable and therefore a threat to the repression of his identity. At the end of season one, Mike had begun to repress his identity but was still largely unaware of it. What has changed at the end of season two is Mike’s awareness of what it is that he’s repressing and his subsequent denial of it. He starts to push Will away, and his feelings for him, and pushes himself towards El because of his knowledge that he’s supposed to like her, and what is socially acceptable.

Mike Wheeler in Season Three of Stranger Things (Denial)

Now that Mike has gained enough awareness of his own repression of his identity, he has shifted from repression to denial. In season three, Mike actively seeks out help for how he is supposed to act in society and continues to push away anything that suggests he doesn’t conform to society. Despite his attempts to conform Mike is confronted with his and El’s relationship and how it contrasts Lucas and Max's relationship, and his relationship and feelings for Will.

Denial and Conscious Defense (Season Three) 

Mike and El’s relationship isn’t like Max and Lucas’s. They don’t go to the movies together, or hang out with their friends, or maintain a connection outside of their romantic relationship. Even Suzie and Dustin, as we later learn, share interests and memories, further showing that there is something off about Mike and El’s relationship. Hopper complains about Mike and El’s relationship to Joyce and tells her that he thinks something is wrong with it. What is shown on this level doesn’t affect Mike’s character, or force him to confront his identity. He doesn’t see the contrast between his and El’s relationship and the others like we do. It is however, important to acknowledge the emphasis on the contrast to the viewer alongside Mike’s denial of his sexuality. As Mike’s identity is becoming a conscious problem for him, it is also becoming a conscious possibility to the audience perceiving his character. 

Mike and Will, and Max and Lucas meet up to see a movie at the mall. Mike’s late after hanging out with El, and Lucas makes fun of him. He mocks Mike, saying, “Oh, El. I wish we could make out forever and never hang out with any of our friends.” Lucas’s words imply that Mike’s relationship with El and the actions he makes aren’t normal. By making fun of it he’s pointing out elements within it that are off. Lucas continues to tease Mike until Mike gets defensive, saying, “Yeah, it’s so funny that I want to spend romantic time with my girlfriend.” Mike is trying to reaffirm that his and El’s relationship is normal. He’s denying Lucas’s claims that it’s something wrong and something that can be made fun of, to which Lucas responds, “I’m spending romantic time with my girlfriend.” The difference that Lucas is highlighting between his and Mike’s romantic relationships is Mike’s denial that there is something weird about it. It’s not normal to never hang out with the Party, considering that they’re all friends, and Mike’s excuse of “spending romantic time with [his] girlfriend” is immediately refuted. 

Mike is very quick to deny Lucas’s teasing. As Mike isn’t able to completely repress his identity anymore, he becomes more defensive to anything that implies he doesn’t fit into society. Denial is a conscious act of defense for Mike, both internal and external, which is why he becomes defensive so quickly in response to Lucas’s teasing.

Will Byers, Identity and Denial, and Confrontation (Season Three)

When El breaks up with him, Mike goes to Lucas for help. Their relationship doesn’t come naturally to him, but as he is in denial of his identity, he needs their relationship to work. In doing this, he pushes Will away, and their interests and connection. While Mike is unable to figure out how to apologize to El on his own, he doesn’t hesitate to run after Will. Will is more important to Mike than the denial of his identity. The first real fight between Mike and Will happens because of Mike’s denial. It’s a similar situation, Mike getting defensive when it’s implied that he doesn’t fit perfectly into society, like him getting defensive at Lucas’s teasing at the mall. However, this situation is still very different from what happened at the mall because Will isn’t Lucas. His existence in Mike’s life is a blatant counter to Mike’s denial of his identity. Mike’s denial doesn’t present simply as defense with Will, it presents as Mike pushing Will away and both of them getting frustrated and yelling at each other as a consequence when things get pushed too far.

Mike and Will’s fight in season three is a result of their separate conflicts surrounding their identities. It’s set off by Lucas and Mike making fun of Will for still wanting to play D&D, but quickly boils down to the main issue: Mike and Will’s relationship, and Mike’s denial of it resulting in him pushing Will away. In the basement, when Will’s had enough, he says he’s going home and Mike goes after him, Lucas is left behind. Their conversation shifts from Mike saying, “It’s a cool campaign. It’s really cool. We’re just not in the mood right now,” rather quickly to Will saying, “You’re destroying everything- and for what? So you can swap spit with some stupid girl?” They start off talking about the whole Party, Lucas, Mike, Will and Dustin, but the Party isn’t why Mike and Will are fighting. Will is the one to shift the conversation away from the Party and onto Mike. 

Immediately after Will narrows in on Mike, Mike gets defensive and says, “El’s not stupid. It’s not my fault you don’t like girls.” Will is calling Mike and El’s relationship into question, he’s forcing Mike into a conversation where he will be unable to deny his identity to himself any longer, so he throws it right back at Will. Mike’s denial of his identity is tied to his relationship with El, to getting older and fitting into society. Will’s denial of his identity is tied to his relationship with the party, to playing games in Mike’s basement and not having to think about falling in love or what is expected of them in the future. Will is devaluing Mike’s relationship, his attempt to fit into society, and Mike responds in turn.

“I’m not trying to be a jerk, okay? But we’re not kids anymore. I mean, what did you think, really? That we were never gonna get girlfriends? That we were just gonna sit in my basement all day and play games for the rest of our lives?”

In the same way that Will brought up how Mike’s focus on his and El’s relationship is negatively affecting all of their friends, and pointing out how Mike’s denial is “destroying [their] party”, Mike latches onto Will’s denial. He is telling Will that what he’s trying to do is unrealistic and unattainable, despite the fact that Mike having genuine feelings for El is also unattainable. He is not specifically talking about Will being queer, nor is Will talking about Mike being queer, they are talking about themselves and projecting their frustration onto each other. 

After Mike shifts the focus of the conversation onto Will, there is another major shift, once again because of Will, he responds to Mike by saying, “Yeah. I guess I did. I really did,” and then he rides into the rain on his bike. The conversation has shifted from Mike and Will as each other’s focus, to something deeper; their relationship and what Will expected for him and Mike. Will took Mike’s words as Mike talking about their relationship rather than Mike returning Will’s words about his denial. Will isn’t denying anything. He’s telling Mike the truth and the truth has different implications than Mike’s words. Mike is conscious of this shift, his face falls, and he yells after Will as he leaves. The fight in season three between Mike and Will has two major shifts, both initiated by Will: the first being the shift from the conversations focus on the party to Mike and Will as individuals, and the second being the shift from Mike and Will to Mike and Will’s relationship and its implications.

When Mike is in a situation of high stress, like Will being possessed or fighting with Will about their relationship, he isn’t able to consider the societal implications of his actions. He relies on what’s natural to him, and after fighting with Will, it’s running after him. Mike doesn’t have time to deny his feelings for Will, he’s more focused on apologizing. We see how Mike’s denial crumbles away, despite Lucas beside him as he goes after Will to make things right. Mike doesn’t hesitate. His and Will’s relationship comes naturally to him. Unlike with El, who Mike needs to ask others for help with, Mike knows exactly what he needs to do with Will, which is another hit to his denial of his identity. The way Mike handles his fight with Will is very different from how he handles his and El’s break up. The proximity of these two events forces Mike to compare them, and starts to crack the defenses of his internal denial of his identity. 

Mike and El’s Relationship (Season Three)

At the end of season three, it continues the trend of reaffirming Mike and El’s relationship, but unlike in season one and two, it’s not initiated by Mike. In season one, Mike kissed El because he was repressing his identity. In season two, Mike kissed El because he was in denial of his identity. In season three, Mike doesn’t kiss El because he has been forced to accept his identity. When she kisses him, he doesn’t reciprocate, and appears confused afterwards. Despite his acceptance, Mike’s journey with his identity isn’t over, because now he has a new problem; El kissed him. They’re still in a relationship, and he has feelings for Will. Mike is given no time to attempt to fix this as Will and El move away from Hawkins at the end of the season.

Mike Wheeler in Season Four of Stranger Things (Acceptance + Fear)

Acceptance, Awareness and Concealment (Season Four)

We learn early on in season four that Mike’s started to embrace a different side of himself with his appearance. His hair is longer, he wears dark clothes: he’s not trying to fit into what is socially acceptable anymore. Mike has once again started playing D&D. That was what started off Mike and Will’s fight in season three, and at the end of season three was what they talked about before Will left Hawkins. D&D doesn’t represent Will trying to hold onto their childhood. It represents living outside of what is acceptable. To Mike and Will it means even more because it’s a piece of the foundation of their relationship. Mike is now fully aware of his identity and has accepted it. Acceptance means that he has become unable to deny his queerness, but it does not mean that he experiences any less internal conflict over his queerness. In season four Mike is faced with many situations that escalate because of his own fears about his identity and the reality that he finds himself in. Mike goes to California and has to confront both Will and El, his friend who he has feelings for and his girlfriend who he’s still in a relationship with despite his knowledge of his identity and his feelings.

Now that Mike is aware of his identity and has accepted it, he has become far worse at being able to hide it. Mike arrives in Lenora wearing bright colours and clothes that are nothing like what he was wearing to school the day before. He brings El flowers, and while he doesn’t initiate their kiss, he does reciprocate. Until Mike sees Will, he is doing an adequate job of hiding his identity from everyone. His clothes make him stand out and are clearly not normal for him, but what really breaks his facade is when he doesn’t hug Will. Not hugging Will is far more incriminating for Mike than greeting him normally. Mike has a strong start at the airport but it becomes clear rather quickly that when Mike is faced with Will, his defenses start to fall apart. Mike is overthinking his actions around Will. He is aware of his feelings for Will and overcomplicates everything because of it. At the airport, Mike is unable to hug Will, to greet him like a normal friend, and fails in starting a normal conversation. If Argyle didn’t bring attention to Mike’s off brand shirt and his false expression of his identity, then he might have still had a chance to appear normal, in both the audience and other character’s eyes but with that last nail in the coffin, Mike is unable to appear normal in the audience’s or the character’s perceptions. Mike’s fears and defensive stance have shifted away from denial of his identity, and now to the possibility of others figuring it out.

Mike doesn’t talk to Will until he is forced into a stressful situation where he is, as is usual of his character, unable to match his actions to society's standards. Initially, Mike doesn’t notice the situation with El as he is focused on hiding his identity from Will and El. Mike is alone for the first time in six months with the two people who his newly accepted identity are directly affected by. Most of Mike’s actions at Rink O’ Mania are based in his fear of Will and El finding out about him. However, his actions are not like how they were in season three. Mike’s denial of his identity presented outwardly as anger and defensiveness, his acceptance presents as avoidance and deflection. Mike knows who he is. He needs to turn the conversation away from himself to stop anyone from looking any closer at him and seeing who he is for themselves. 

Will and the Closet (Season Four)

Mike and Will’s fight at Rink O’ Mania isn’t due to Mike and Will’s denial of their identities. There is a new point of contention in their relationship: the closet. Both Mike and Will are fully aware of their identities and their feelings for one another, but are unaware of the other’s feelings. Once again, they are taking out their individual struggles with their identities out on each other. This is a result of Mike and Will’s feelings for each other feeding the escalation of their frustration. It’s the same thing that happened with Mike and Will’s fight in season three, but instead of defense and anger driving the conversation, it’s deflection. 

During this fight, Mike yells at Will, “You were! You were rolling your eyes, you were… you were moping! You were barely talking. You basically sabotaged the whole day.” Mike is turning the conversation away from his actions and onto Will. He’s trying to keep Will away from the truth, but it doesn’t work because Will is also trying to keep Mike from figuring out the truth. Will uses El to defect from Mike’s sudden turn on him, telling Mike, “Well, she was lying to you Mike! Straight to your face ever since you got here…” This part of Will’s response is in line with his and Will’s mutual deflection, but just like in the rain fight, Will is the one to shift the conversation onto his and Mike’s relationship.

Will asks, “What about us?” when Mike starts to walk away. Will is not in the same position as Mike. He doesn’t have a girlfriend and while there are still consequences to his words, they aren’t as damning as they’d be if they came from Mike. In season one it was established that Will would cast fireball rather than protection; he’s more inclined to put himself in danger. Mike and Will’s characterizations are opposites when it comes to handling danger. Where Will is more likely to take the risk, Mike plays it safe. This is often seen as Mike being overprotective of people like Will and El, rather than Mike trying to find the safest way to proceed. This aspect of their characters is seen on a larger level, like Will telling them to close the gate when he was possessed, and telling Joyce to run through the lights in season one, or in Mike’s case it’s seen through his overprotectiveness and ability to come up with the safest plans like sedating Will in season two rather than trying to hold him back. Will throws himself into the line of fire while Mike works to minimize damage. This is why Will is always the one to bring up the importance of their relationship. It’s simply an aspect of his character, just like Mike’s complete avoidance of the topic is Mike’s way of trying to find the safest way out of the situation. However, when Mike is confronted by Will in this manner, he’s too shocked to say anything substantial in response until much later. 

Will’s insistence on bringing up his and Mike’s relationship puts pressure on Mike. This pressure reaches a high when Will asks Mike one last time, “And us?” Will keeps pushing for Mike to give him an answer, an answer that Mike is trying to avoid. Since Will is the one asking him this and the added stress of what happened with El, Mike isn’t able to abide by his knowledge of what is socially acceptable. Mike responds to Will asking him about their relationship by trying to deflect, but again like his and Will’s reunion at the airport, he overcompensates. Mike says, “We’re friends. We are friends.” This is unnecessary and Mike soon finds out about his mistake when Will says, “Well, we used to be best friends!” This clarifies that Will was talking about their friendship, while Mike interpreted Will’s words as comparing their relationship to his and El’s romantic relationship.

The stress of not being able to find El and fighting with Will forced Mike to make split second decisions. Will cornered him and Mike started to push him away. He got scared. Mike isn’t acting out of frustration like he did in season three. Mike’s denial of his identity is very different from his acceptance and fear of others figuring him out. Another difference between the fight in season three and the fight at Rink O’ Mania is that Mike doesn’t push Will into leaving. Mike’s the one that walks away from the conversation. He ends it by saying, “Let’s just find her, okay?” instead of escalating it further. Mike’s understanding of himself has changed the way he responds to feeling unsafe and to the possibility of a conversation heading towards a discussion of his identity. 

El and Confrontation (Season Four)

After Will and Mike’s fight, we then see the state of Mike's relationship with El. She confronts him about not being able to tell her he loves her, or sign his letters Love, Mike. Since Mike accepted his identity he has been trying to distance himself from El. Mike also doesn’t like lying. In the first season he was adamant that everyone follow the Party’s rule that “friends don’t lie.” Mike knows that he doesn’t love her romantically and he doesn’t actively lie to her in the letters. However, his actions are still led by fear and he has been avoiding the topic of his identity rather than outright lying. Mike does care about El, he shows this when he goes to her the day after Rink O’ Mania to try and talk about everything. Despite the fact that he’s just found out that El has been lying to him about how she’s actually been doing in Lenora, Mike is attempting to start a conversation about it rather than a fight. Mike attempts to connect with El by saying, “I’ve been bullied my whole life. I know what it's like.” Even when she responds negatively, telling him, “No. You don’t,” Mike still manages to remain mostly calm. 

This calmness persists until El turns the conversation a little too close to Mike’s actions, to his identity. When Mike asks her to tell him what he isn’t getting, she says, “I am different. I do not belong.” She is saying that Mike can’t understand what she’s going through because he isn’t different. This causes Mike’s demeanor to shift from calm to deflective. Mike is different, so El saying that he isn’t, is untrue but Mike can’t tell her that. This situation leaves him unable to talk to El about what happened without telling her the truth. He ends up overcompensating because El has pushed him into a corner. Mike tells her that, “[he cares for her so much].” He isn’t lying, but he’s still in a position where he has to actively avoid the truth. El then pushes him further by bringing up his letters and saying, “You can’t even write it, Mike” and “From, Mike. From, Mike. From, Mike,” citing evidence from all of his letters. She pushes Mike far enough that he starts trying to invalidate and deflect every part of their conversation in order to conceal the truth.

“Eleven, you’re being ridiculous- wh- like- what is this? You- you know what I think of you. You’re the most incredible person in the world. And, you can’t let these mouth breathers ruin you- ruin us. I mean, they’re nobodies. They’re nobodies. And you’re a superhero.”

Most characters don’t call El, Eleven. By calling her this, Mike is creating distance between them. This is also a sign that he’s stressed enough to completely forgo putting any thought into his words. His priority is changing the trajectory of the conversation and deflecting away from El’s confrontation about his shortcomings in their relationship. Unlike El, Mike doesn’t present any evidence to back up his claims. His words are not meant to reassure El or comfort her. Mike’s initial priority was comfort and understanding, but as soon as El brought up his actions, Mike’s priority shifted towards concealing his identity and the truth that comes with it.

Actions and Awareness (Season Four)

Mike and El’s conversation fell apart when El brought up being different from other people because, like Will, she backed Mike into a corner and started to push towards the truth. Mike ends up deflecting and pushing them both away. In season three, Mike lied to El. Hopper confronted Mike about him and El and  allowed Hopper to put distance between them. Mike made no move to go after El by himself. This changes in season four. After their fight, El is arrested and Mike runs after her. Acceptance means that Mike is aware of the reasons behind his actions. He is now in a position where he is able to think about finding a solution to his relationship with El and his feelings for Will. However, concealment and fear still motivate a lot of what he says and does in season four. Mike queerness is both why he needs to fix things, but also why he hasn’t figured out how to. There is no answer to his and El’s relationship that doesn't involve telling her about his identity. 

In the seasons prior to season four, Mike was attempting to fit into a society he still felt he belonged in. Now Mike knows he’s different but high stress situations still affect his decision making. Fighting with Will and El forces Mike’s actions to reflect truths that he is usually better at concealing. It’s still the same situation that caused Mike to grab Will’s hands in season two, and run after him after their fight in season three. The difference between season four and the others is that Mike was able to isolate these incidents. His repression and denial of his identity allowed him to compartmentalize it. Mike only had to confront his identity when he was forced to repress it or deny it. Now in season four, Mike is constantly aware of his identity. All of his actions are affected by it. 

From when Mike first arrives in Lenora wearing different clothes and acting weird around Will, to every conversation Mike and Will have, Mike’s actions are affected by his identity. Whether that be the concealment of his identity in his fights with El and Will, or in his feelings towards Will affecting how he acts in their relationship. After El is taken into custody, Mike, Will and Jonathan are put under house arrest by the government. With El gone, Mike’s internal conflict is no longer split in between two people in his immediate vicinity. His priorities shift from concealing his identity to finding El. The focus is no longer on Mike’s actions. As a result, Mike focuses less on hiding and this allows for the development of his and Will’s relationship because Mike stops pushing Will away whenever the conversation focuses on Mike. This shift can be seen when Mike initiates a conversation with Will and willingly discusses his own actions. 

The apology from Mike to Will happens just before they are shot at and go on the run in Argyle’s pizza van with Jonathan. Mike walks into Will’s room with his bag and Will asks, “Packed already?” and Mike responds, “Yeah, I mean. I never really unpacked.” These lines are meant to alert the viewer of Mike’s unresolved conflict. He got to Lenora and was immediately faced with El and Will. He wasn’t given the chance to sort things out between them. This line indicates that he was going to attempt to work things out. His reluctance to tell El he loves her is also an indication that Mike has been aware of his identity since he and El began sending letters to each other, and that he doesn't want to lie to her about it or that he is unable to lie to her about it. Mike’s fight with El shows us that he doesn’t want to lie to her but he hasn’t figured out how to tell her yet. Mike’s apology to Will shows us that he doesn’t want to lie to Will but he hasn’t figured out how to tell him how he feels. Mike is trying to make things right, but he’s scared to tell them the truth. 

Mike, in an attempt to make things right, apologizes to Will. He says, “Thanks by the way… for knocking some sense into me. I was being a total self-pitying idiot.” Mike acknowledges the way that he acted and willingly explains his reasons. He doesn’t tell Will the real reason that he was acting that way but acknowledges that there was a reason. Mike isn’t denying or deflecting the truth in this conversation; he’s confronting it himself. When Will tries to accept some of the blame for how things have gone since Mike arrived, Mike refutes him. 

“No. No, no, no, you didn’t deserve anything. Listen, the truth is the last year has been weird, y’know? And I mean, Max and Lucas and Dustin, they-they’re great- they’re great, it’s just- it’s Hawkins. It’s not the same without you.”

In refuting Will, Mike is willingly continuing a conversation about their relationship. He is allowing “the truth” to be the main focus. This is a change from his previous deflection of Will’s attempts to discuss their relationship, and by association, Mike’s identity. Mike’s journey does not end at his own acceptance of his identity. It ends with the expression of his identity. Being in the closet, having a girlfriend, not telling Will how he feels: these are all ways that Mike has become unable to express his queerness. It is not enough for Mike to know about himself. As this is the story of a queer character, acceptance of his own identity is only part of what needs to happen for Mike’s story arc with his personal conflict concerning his identity to be completed. The other part is being visibly queer in society, “coming out” to people that are important to him. Mike still exists within society's standards of acceptable behaviour. He still hasn’t broken the mold created in season one. That is the last thing that needs to happen for Mike’s identity arc to be completed. While this is not resolved in season four, scenes like his apology to Will, are setting up the trajectory he will follow in season five.

Mike’s speech to El when she’s in danger fighting Vecna is prompted by Will. It is not due to his own feelings, but due to societal pressure. Complicating this further, Will tells him that he’s “the heart.” This is what he told Mike when he gave him the painting that he said was commissioned by El.  As Mike and Will have been trying to pry answers out of each other throughout all of season four, they’ve also been reading through the lines of what the other is saying. They have been trying to figure out if they will accept the expression of their identity. So, when Will calls Mike “the heart” to push him into talking to El, he is also taking away any hope Mike had that the painting was actually from Will. In season four, Mike is the one to reach out to El to reaffirm their relationship, but unlike prior seasons, he is fully aware of his identity and actively being forced to conform. Mike’s speech doesn’t work because it’s not genuine, and Mike is unable to to fully conceal his identity while he is in a high stress situation, heartbroken, and completely aware that he’s lying. Mike can’t hide his identity anymore. This scene with El is showing us that not only does Mike need to fix his relationships with Will and El, but also that it is becoming more of a problem as time goes on. At the end of season four, Mike’s concealment of his identity is starting to fall apart. 

Mike Wheeler in Stranger Things (Conclusion)

In season one Mike learns what society deems unacceptable, that being queer or being perceived as queer is unacceptable. At the end of the season, Mike starts to repress his identity. His actions, which began as unmatched to society, have now fit into how Mike has been told he is supposed to exist. Season two explores Mike’s repression of his identity and his eventual denial as he is made aware of how he does not fit into society. In his denial, he pushes Will away and himself towards El. Mike’s actions in season two, like season one, begin as outside of what is expected from him within society, and ends with Mike matching his actions once again to what is socially acceptable. Season Three is a continuation of that denial and shift in his relationship with Will, and his new relationship with El. Eventually in season three Mike is forced to accept and become fully aware of his identity. His actions don't match with society at the end of season three, indicating this shift. At the end of season three, and through season four, Mike is hiding his queerness; He is in the closet. Now that he is aware of his identity and has been forced to accept it, he is unable to properly match his actions to what is socially acceptable. Mike’s need to express his identity causes his attempts to conceal it to fail. The end of Mike’s arc with his identity will concern his inability to hide it any longer, and his need to express it to others.

[nakianshuri]

Not to wade too deeply in the "Nancy is selfish/always right posts" I've being seeing lately, but I don't think that's the problem with how Nancy is written.

Yes, when it comes to the plot and solving mysteries, Nancy is always right. But Dustin is mostly if not always right, too, and so is Robin. The show has a lot of characters who are right about things. But all of those other characters get to have moments of levity. Moments where the show isn't taking them so seriously. Robin is brilliant and always right, but she rambles, she's awkward, she talks to Steve about things unrelated to the plot. Dustin is brilliant and drives a lot of the plot because he's always right, but he's also awkward, funny, a know-it-all who needs to be humbled sometimes, and gets to engage in conversations and activities unrelated to the plot.

El is another character who I'd say is mostly if not always right and the most traumatized character on the show, but she gets moments to be fun, funny, and has scenes completely unrelated to the plot. S3 gave her an entire montage of trying on clothes at the mall for no reason except to show her gaining a friend and building up her own voice and identity.

We arguably don't see this with Nancy. When it comes to her emotional life outside of her trauma and the plot, she's underwritten. We never see her appear to enjoy herself as much as she did at Steve's pool party, when we're told through Jonathan and Barb that she pretending to be someone else. Right after Barb's death and then in the seasons afterwards when she's with Jonathan, we mostly if not only see one side of her: the driven and determined side, whether that's her on a crusade to get justice for Barb, or to be taken seriously at her summer internship, or when she's working on the school yearbook. There's no downtime, barely if any scenes of her and Jonathan talking about anything other than their shared trauma, the plot, and their career/academic goals. After season 1, we don't see her have a casual conversation with Mike what she's going through or what his life is like.

With the exception of talking about Steve and Jonathan, her conversations with Robin are about the plot. I mean, I have no problem with Robin and Nancy as friends, but why are they friends? Nancy was rude to Robin until she realizes she and Steve aren't dating, but perhaps Robin sees Nancy's unhappy and needs a friend? I'd accept that, but I'd also argue that Robin and Nancy's friendship is a lesser version of El and Max's. Both friendships start off with El and Nancy being rude to Max and Robin, respectively, out of jealousy. But we get to see Max and El become friends before the plot enters the story: El needs Max's help with boy problems, Max gives her advice, they bond, they play around at the mall, have a sleepover, then they get dragged into the plot. Robin and Nancy don't get that in part because of how s4 is structured, but also because we just don't get Nancy outside of her ambitions, shared trauma, and the plot. Nancy's not a character we ever see just hang out.

And lastly, Stancy. I love Stancy oddly enough because of the reason they broke up: it as the last time she got to be a stupid teenager like everyone else on the show. But for me it also works for me because the show has given Steve time apart from the plot to grow. I've seen some people say the show doesn't care enough about Steve, but I don't believe that at all. Sure, we haven't seen his parents, but his whole arc is about how he grows not only because of the plot but because of his relationships with other people: Nancy, Dustin, and Robin primarily. He's given a chance to be selfish, pigheaded, bitchy, dumb, and wrong, and then to apologize, be a good friend, be selfless, and wisely reflect on his behavior in a productive way that doesn't leave him stuck in a cycle of guilt about his past behavior. Nancy needs this same treatment. The majority of the self-reflection Nancy gets to do is about Barb, and its to wrongly blame herself for her death and to be stuck in avenging mode. She has a great conversation with her mom in which she seems to regret how she's disregarded Jonathan, but it's mostly there to reaffirm that she's right not for her to consider if she went about things the right way. We have also never heard her reconsider if she went about her relationship with Steve the right way either. Does she regret how that ended? Does she regret dating him for a year despite appearing to want Jonathan? We don't know.

I think Nancy is a fascinating character, and I never expect any show to be perfect or to replicate how I envision these characters. But I do hope that in its last season we get to see another side to her.