#and now taeminie is about to come home

[tulsa24]

2022 was such a great time to become a shawol 💎

[byeoltoyuki]

Dream ⇾ LEE TAEMIN

↳Pairing : You x Taemin

Genre : Fluff / Humor / Drabble

Words: +2k

Warnings: Don't do this to kitchen counters, it is dangerous.

Author: Yuna

Summary : When you wake up at 3am because of a dream in which you make out with your close friend Taemin, but then said friend turns up because he has a nightmare, it becomes very difficult to think about anything else.

A/N : Special thanks to @mouserzwuzhere for triggering my inspiration with her drabble prompts lists! A few of them are in this drabble.

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When you opened your eyes, you saw your alarm clock showing 2.30am in the morning. Your heart was racing like crazy after the dream you just had, so intense it actually woke you up. You turned your bedside lamp on and sat up a little in your bed, your hand resting on top of your chest, your eyes closed, trying to clam yourself down.

You were a bit disappointed to have woken up from this dream to be honest, it was really good and for once you remembered it, probably because you woke up in the middle of it.

It was clearly a dream highly inspired by your current emotions and feelings towards your friend, Taemin. The two of you had gotten really close lately and you had been hoping that he was sharing the same feelings as you did. In the last few weeks you had been openly flirting with him but decided not to make the final push. You wanted it to come from him, you wanted to give him the freedom to start something with you when he felt ready. You honestly believed he was flirting with you too, his gestures, his words and attention towards you were proof of that.

But clearly you were frustrated deep inside, even if you pretended to be absolutely fine with how long he was taking, dreams don't lie, dreams tell the truth.. And you shared an intense making out session in your dream, THAT was the truth. You wanted to kiss him, make out with him, hug and call him your boyfriend.

You tried to go back to sleep but you kept having images of your dream popping up in your mind, forcing you to daydream about his sweet lips against yours. You rapidly decided that this was all in vain and you might as well get up and do something useful whilst you were going to be awake.

So you thought of your options and took the decision to bake chocolate chip muffins. You loved them, Taemin loved them, you loved Taemin…

This was seriously getting out of hand...

You threw your whole attention into the baking process, you even weighed the ingredients as precisely as you could, when usually you would 'guesstimate' how much was needed. 61g when the recipe said 50g? That'll do.

You were in the middle of chopping up the chocolate when you heard a knock on the door.

"What the hell? Who's here at 3 in the morning??" you asked yourself.

You headed to the door very quietly, trying to not let the person behind your door know that you were awake just in case it was dangerous. Like a serial killer. You peaked through the hole in your door and was instantly relieved to see your friend, the man you liked.

"Taemin?" you said whilst opening the door to him.

You saw his head look up at the sound of your voice, and his face changed instantly from a worried look to instant relief. You did not have a chance to ask him what was going on that he took a step forward and crushed you in his embrace. Surprised, you didn't say a word, instead you brought your arms around him and hugged him back, gently stroking him in comfort. You could hear his heart race in his chest but gradually calm down, you suspected he was following the rhythm of your breathing to calm himself as you were breathing in perfect sync.

"I had a nightmare about you and I just wanted to make sure you're okay."

Your legs nearly gave up at the cuteness of the man. And you managed to stop yourself from cooing out loud! Which was an incredible effort giving how cute he was with his messed up hair, his baby face and sleepy eyes. Instead you took a step back into your home, taking Taemin with you as you were still in each other's arms. He followed you, not letting go of you even for a second, and instead nuzzled his face in the crook of your neck as soon as you pushed the door closed with your foot.

You stayed in this position for a little while longer, you could feel the warmth of your body spreading to his own, colder since he just came from outside.

Eventually, you pushed him away gently and scooped his face in both your hands, smiling brightly:

"You are adorable! Do you know that?"

"Just never do anything dangerous okay? I don't want anything happening to you..."

He then pouted and you had to bite your lips to not comment on this either. Instead you decided to tease him a little bit, he did seem a bit shaken up by whatever nightmare he had and you wanted to try and make him happy again.

"Does opening my door at 3 am in the morning count as something dangerous ?"

The pouting intensified, making you giggle. You just wanted to bite that bottom lip. Very distracting.

"It was only me!" Taemin retorted. "Just don't open it to strangers."

"You could have been a serious killer... Just saying." you shrugged your shoulders, teasing one more time.

The handsome man didn't think of a response this time, that's when you knew it was enough teasing. So you grabbed both his hands in yours and looked at him in the eyes:

"I am fine Taeminie, okay? It was just a bad dream..."

Taemin nodded slightly, his attention focused on your hands, you could feel his thumbs brushing the top of your hands, you heart was fluttering. Very distracting again.

"Do you want to stay over tonight?" You ended up asking him. You started thinking that maybe you teased him a bit too much, usually he joked around as much as you, but maybe this nightmare really did shake him up more than you thought and you should just take it more seriously.

"If I didn't know any better, I'd say you are trying to seduce me." Taemin dropped, a mischievous look in his eyes.

There he was, the Taemin you're used to, the one that teases you back, the one that flirts with you too. You screamed and jumped internally, you wanted to kiss him so badly.

"Hold on tiger, I'll sleep under the sheets, you sleep on top of them!"

Taemin didn't bother responding anything to that, he removed his shoes and entered your flat, aiming straight for your kitchen. Of course he must have smelt your preps for the muffins, plus the oven was warming up and making that distinctive noise. You followed him, making sure you took a deep breath before to calm your exhausted heart, that was way too much emotions in one night, that dream of you and him, and him actually turning up in your apartment half an hour later.

"Why are you baking muffins at 3 in the morning?" Taemin obviously asked, and you couldn't blame him, that was just weird.

You scratched your head, a bit embarrassed, debating on how much information you should give out to him. And "I dreamed we were making out and it was so intense it woke me up." was certainly too much information. So instead you went for a plain:

"I just had a dream that woke me up and I couldn't fall back asleep."

"Oh I see, that makes two of us then..." the young man commented, sitting down at your kitchen bar, supposedly to watch you as you finish baking your muffins.

*Except mine was reaaaally nice* You could not stop yourself from thinking. When you realised Taemin's eyes were on you, for a second you wondered if you had been thinking out loud, and started blushing furiously. The next second, Taemin's hand was delicately on your cheek, which did not help.

"Are you ok?" He asked, looking a bit concerned.

"Yeah yeah all good." you shrugged off, making your way around the counter to face your chopping board again. At this rate, it was going to be a very long night and you couldn't guarantee you would manage to keep your feelings for yourself any longer. Somehow having a large piece of furniture between you and him (and a knife in your hand) made you feel more in control. You started chopping off the chocolate bars again and thankfully got into a comfortable conversation with your friend that took your mind out of your emotions for a little bit.

A very short bit.

As you just finished your task, you realised Taemin was leaning against the counter, his face in his hands. But he was giving you that look again without noticing, the look that made you realise you were in love with him not that long ago. He had a small smile on his face and his eyes were flooding with affection towards you. He was staring at you talking about nonsense like you were the most beautiful and precious person in his existence. Damn that was distracting.

"If you carry on eating the chocolate chips you just chopped there won't be any left for the muffins." His voice brought you back on earth and you found yourself staring at his hand on yours like an idiot. Luckily, he took it for something else.

"I am holding your hand so that you don't eat any more. Naughty."

He smiled.

And now you were blind.

"But it's so delicious!" You decided to fight back and whined a little bit, managing to sneak in another piece of chocolate in your mouth. Taemin looked baffled, as if he didn't expect you to retaliate and observed you as you poked your tongue out to provoke him.

"Mmh soo goood!" you exaggerated, moaning loudly, your eyes closing for a second.

When you opened them however, the look on Taemin's face had changed. Frustration, annoyance, determination, maybe desire? You weren't sure what it was until he got up from his seat, leaned forward on the kitchen counter and grabbed the back of your head with his hand before pulling you closer to him.

And then his lips crashed on yours.

Your eyes opened wide at the contact but as soon as he moved his lips softly to adjust their position, what was happening clicked in your mind and you closed your eyes to enjoy the feeling of the kiss. Because he was finally kissing you! Taemin was holding your neck firmly, giving you no chance to escape his lips - not that you wanted to- . You only wished you could bring one of your hands on his face, to make more contact with him. As if he heard your mental wish, Taemin placed his fingers under your chin and opened his mouth sightly, inviting you to deepen the kiss if you wanted, which you responded positively to. Eventually, the two of you broke the kiss, a shy smile on your faces and slightly out of breath.

"You were right, it is delicious." he commented and you laughed happily together.

You both had a light pink blush covering your cheeks from sharing that passionate kiss, Taemin's fingers had now shifted to your cheek and he looked at you intensely again, but this time on purpose, knowing fully what he was doing.

"You are adorable, do you know that?" he asked you.

"Ask me what I was dreaming of earlier to wake up like that."

Taemin looked at you with a smirk, suspiciously.

"Alright then, what did you dream of? Was it nice?"

It was your turn to play with him a little bit now, so you pushed his hand away and climbed on the kitchen counter. Like a predator, you crawl slowly towards your new boyfriend, stopped 2 centimeters away from him, sat on your knees and put your arms around his neck before giving him a peck on the lips.

"Exactly that, we were making out." Peck on the lips. "Heavily." Another peck.

You could see you were driving him crazy. You decided to strike the final blow.

"I can't get you out of my head, even in my sleep."

Taemin threw his arms around your hips and before kissing you one more time said:

"Oh my God I love you so damn much."

[little-dragon-stories]

Everything happens for a reason Part 22: the talk we've been waiting for.

Omg. Guys, I told you. It's sad and beautiful at the same time. Don't worry too much at the end of the day, everybody will be happy. I hope... 😅

Just so you know, I know nothing about Rosé except that I can recognize her on a picture. So, how I portrayed her is purely up to the needs of my story.

My dearest reader @hopetookmysoul called my Taeminie and Jimin "min min". I had no choice to use it, and I will use it next parts as well. I just love that ship name too much 🤧

Warning: angst at his purest form. If you feel depressed, don't read.

WC: 5061

8 days after your drinking night with Namjoon

Today with Taeminie, you have selected 3 luxury apartments that match your criteria. The 3 of them downtown Seoul, all in the same complex with a high security level. Also very importantly for you, it had to give you access to the backyard, something rare in big cities. You visited only one of them this morning and because you were charmed right away, you decided to buy it without further ado. Everything about the apartment enchanted you. It has 3 large rooms, one more than your needs but that’s perfect, you will have more space when your friends come in visit. It’s a sunny, modern place with a lot of kitchen cabinets, a big tub and the windows overlook the backyard. The apartment is already empty and as soon as the transaction of the sale will be finalized, it will be at your entire disposal. Paying cash with the insurance amount you had for the accident prevented the worries that the bank could have caused, therefore you are confident the transaction will be signed soon.

The presence of your friend by your side, taking your hand or encircling your waist to pretend he was your “man”, gave you the credibility needed to buy a very expensive, luxury, downtown apartment. Being friend with an idol has its advantage and to be honest, you know your relation with Taemin is true and not based on his celebrity status so you didn’t mind to play the game at all, calling him baby or my love, even pecking his lips in front of the real estate representative because you knew he would pretend to be bothered by that as soon as you will be alone together. The truth is, it was a never ending game between you and him, you playfully trying to seduce him and him “eeeewing” you to make you act upset. 

That little game started one day at the beginning of your contract with him, the first month you were dancing together. One day, a woman came and intensely tried to flirt with him. The first reaction he had was to come closer to you and take your hand saying “that girl, she’s my girlfriend so please, don’t try anything with me, I am a satisfied man”. Of course, the second the woman turned her back, Taemin have told you that his “favorite Jeon’s ass were Jungkook’s” to make sure there were no ambiguity between the two of you. You have smirk and wink at him and then answered: “it’s just because you haven’t see me in a bikini yet”. He was under your charm just like that, in a clap of fingers. He thought you were a cool person, accepting his homosexuality right away and even joking about that. That refreshing, funny and open minded attitude was soothing for him. That’s how your friendship and that little “I am trying to make you love my ass” game started. The two of connecting together, sharing his little secret and accepting the other as he was. Completely.

Ever since, from time to time, Tae had “used” you to play the girlfriend part, when he felt that was necessary for him or when he noticed you were unamused by a too flirty man. That’s probably how the rumor of you two getting together spread and came into Hobi’s ears.

It’s been exactly 8 days since the party night with Namjoon and you still haven’t recovered from it completely, at least mentally. You have explained everything to Jungkook, sparing him no details and he was more comprehensive that you thought he would be. He promised not to share your feelings with Hobi, encouraged you to talk to him and concluded the conversation saying:

“Noona, you are a grown up woman now, I am touched”.

Never in your life you could have thought that your little brother would said something like that. It was so funny, him “babying” his big sister. He really takes his protective role seriously and that makes you love him even more.

You also have talked more than ever with Namjoon recently, He was checking on you, on your broken heart. A confidence from you brings one of his and little by little, you spent hours talking on the phone, texting or face timing. Everytime, you asked him how he was feeling, if he was ok with you, if he was too hurt to continue talking to you. Every time he gave you the same answer:

“It’s being away from you that would hurt me the most y/n”.

You made things clear with him very often, no possible ambiguity. Your heart may be broken but it still belongs to Hobi. You told him not to wait for you or try anything because it will always stay a friendship relationship. You don’t want to give him false hope, you want him to understand that a romance with him is impossible.

You were not comfortable to talk specifically about Hobi with him, because you really don’t want to hurt him. Your conversations were always more on a philosophical level. You were exchanging with him about your perception of love, the place of friendship in a relation, how can friendship evolve in a romantical relationship? Talking with him was really enriching.

He talked to you specifically about Hoseok one time only. He made you analyse everything with a different point of you. Today, you still can’t answer the questions he served you when he monologues for 10 minutes straight about your relation with Hobi:

“Why haven’t you talk to him before? You are in love with him for such a long time, why keep your distance from him? Personally, first occasion I have, I want to touch the girl, I mean I have that need to get closer sexually or not. I just need to touch and hug her, to get to know her more, not loving her from afar. Be a part of her journey, share her thoughts and yes, touch her all the way possible. It’s a need, the girl is under my skin. Why have you stayed so distant from him? You are a touchy girl, as you called yourself, you are a baby koala. You keep sitting on Jimin’s laps, petting Jin’s head, rub our back, squeeks our cheeks, massage our feet or shoulders first occasion you have, hugging us all the way possible. Girl, the feelings you gave me when you massage my hands while we were watching a movie the other night… my hands for god’s sake. You have that need to touch, to be physical too, just like I do. I know it, I see it. When we transport you, you literally melt on our back or in our arms because you hug us so much. But never with Hobi. You can talk to him, actually you talk to him a lot, I see your complicity and it annoyed me sometimes because you two shared so much intimate conversations. You two together can also be so childish when you start a food war or a staring competition. I see your connection, your complicity, your bound. But always from a certain physical distance. Why? You said you don’t want him to know you love him, but WHY? Don’t you want to touch the man you are in love with so he can touch you back?”

That’s a very good question. You had that need to touch him, you want to. In your mind, you didn’t touch him because you didn’t want him to know. But why didn’t you? As Namjoon said, the need to get closer should have make you do a move in his direction, at attempt to become “something” with him. What was keeping you from doing it? And also, what kept him from doing it? Namjoon didn’t wait 4 years to declare his love. As he told you the other night, he had to talk before he would explode. Why not you? Why not Hoseok?

Namjoon… a perfect man, in love with you. That generous and sensitive man, always analysing things, putting all the stress of bangtan on his shoulders to make it easier for his bandmates. Leading the way in interviews, composing and producing his music. Most importantly, the human behind it all, his sensitivity, the way he puts into words of the most insifignant things to make it suddenly interesting just by the choice of his words. His intelligence and kindness.

Namjoon…

You’ve been thinking about it a lot recently. Comparing Namjoon and Hoseok, their personality, the bond you have with one and another. Namjoon is certainly a man that could have take a big place in your heart if Hobi haven’t take it on the first place. If you were comparing Hobi and Hoseok it was to understand when and how it all went wrong. Not to make a list of the pros and cons because, with both of them, it’s impossible anyway.

After thinking about it over and over again, you fell asleep in Taehyung’s bed since it was his room’s turn. You stick to that comfortable routine to make sure you wouldn't ended in Hobi’s bed night after night. Among all the beds and without consideration for the owner, Tae’s bed was the most comfy. It was fluffy, there was a lot of cushions and each time you change position, you could hug a new one. The bedding was heavy, it gave you the feeling of a big hug while you are sleeping alone.

In your sleep, you felt somebody sitting on the bed beside you and finally laying down in front of you. You felt the soft movement of the pillow under the weight of his head. Used to sleep with Taemin recently, your inconscience doesn’t analysed any further and you filled the distance between him and you, nuzzling you nose in the crook of his neck, clasping your arm around his waist. You kissed him in the neck, because whenever you are sleeping with Tae, you have the habit to lay a kiss on each other, the first body part your lips met. Sometimes it’s a shoulder, sometimes a cheek, sometimes a hand. Touring with him for more than 3 years, you represent each other family when you were away from home. You represent the security and the soothing appeasement of unconditional love. Just like family.

That neck isn’t Taemin’s neck thought. It doesn’t have the same texture under your nose. It doesn’t smell the same. It’s Hoseok’s scent, it’s his body that you feel against yours. Still sleeping, you think that you are dreaming of it, that you dreaming the most beautiful dream. You hold yourself a little stronger against him, overwhelmed by the fact he’s finally in your arms, against you, loving you. What a wonderful feeling.

“Huummmm Hobi” you moan, “You feel so good. Hold me closer please, you ain’t close enough love”.

It’s his fingers, releasing a strand of hair from your face that made you realized what was happening. You opened your eyes and can only stare at his face, his face on the same pillow than you. He seems so tired but managed to smiled anyway.

“Oh No! No! No! No!” You said, coming out of your trance.

“Y/n calm down”.

“What are you doing here? Something happened to Jungkook? Please, tell me my brother is safe”. You are paralyzed, you cannot move away from his body. Whatever he’s doing here, his smile is soft and he seems to be calm so, it must not be a bad news. He took your hands in his before he told you:

“Ssshhh, everybody is safe over there. I came alone because I needed to talk to you.”

“What about the shooting?”

“I won’t be there the last 3 days and the boys will visit a little before coming back”.

“Why are you here?”

“I needed to come,I just told you. I was losing my mind over there”.

You sit straight on the bed and covered yourself with the Mang plushies you’ve taken on Hobi’s bed. If he noticed, he’s not letting you know. Your first reflex would be to run away from the situation but you are well aware that the longer you flee, the stronger it will hit when it catches you.

Still, he was uncomfortably too close for you.

“I think we need to talk”

Even though he was right, you don’t feel strong enough yet. You don’t want to face him ever again to be honest.

“Can we do it another time? It’s the middle of the night”.

According to the clock on your nightstand, it’s 3:20 am. For the first time in a long time, you were sleeping peacefully, maybe because now you will have a place for yourself.

“Please y/n. I am begging you”.

Your right leg was in front of you and you bend your left knee over your straightened leg. Hobi sit right in front but a little bit shifted to your left because of your cast, crossed legs, not leaving a lot of space between you and him. His calm attitude, his soft smile and his tender gaze gave you the courage to dive in this uncomfortable situation.

“Who speaks first?” you asked.

“I am gonna let you start, since there are a few words I’m waiting for” he says, smiling. He was really calm, that surprises you.

“Hoseok, I am sorry oppa. My intoxicated ass doesn't justify my behavior at all. I am ashamed of the words I said, the way I acted and the way you got to learned it”.

“I won’t lie y/n, I was angry. You shouldn’t have talked to my girlfriend like that. I mean it. But that being said, I get you, I understand how you feel. I asked Jimin if I was understanding things correctly, I was sure he knew”.

Oh! No! Jimin, have you talked?

“He didn’t say a word about your feelings but he didn’t deny my theories either. Anyway, with the things you said the other night, I was able to put all the pieces of the puzzle together, Jimin was just in the middle of us, like you were for him and his boyfriend I guess, making each other talk and trying to guide them. By the way, it worked well for them, right?”

Hobi says, naturally tending his palm for you to “high five” it. Instead, you took his precious and delicates fingers in your hand and intertwined fingers with him. To feel it. To feel him. To be as close as possible, in all the way you can. You noticed though, he said “my girlfriend”, not “my ex”.

“It did work. They will have 5 days together when the boys come back. Hopefully, they will enjoy each second they can be together, their love is so precious”.

He nods and continues on his idea.

“I was mad y/n. Really mad at you. The way you treat Chae was rude. But also, I could understand how you feel. My turn to apologise now, I would have never, ever brag about her in front of you if I knew you were in love with me. Never. I hope you know it”.

“I know Hobi”.

“Ok, good. Also…” he’s hesitating. “2 questions. Are you still in love with me? How long have you being in love with me?”

You swallow the little amount of saliva that you have on your mouth, you feel dehydrated. Hobi noticed at the same time you're doing it that you’ve lost weight, too much weight since he last saw you. You don’t look healthy at all, sadness painted all over your face. Recently, you’ve been neglecting yourself and it shows. He’s scared you might suffer from depression. He will have a talk later with Jimin and Jungkook, you need to gain weight otherwise you will disappear. Have you eat at all recently? It’s not the time for this conversation but he promised himself that he will watch after you. The only thing you seemed to haven’t neglected is your personal hygiene, that’s a good sign, right?

You were ready to give him a long and detailed explanation, but at the end of the day, what really matters is “do you still love me” and “for how long”. Gathering your courage, you started to talk very slowly, almost as if you were detached from that story, like you were talking about someone else.

“Yes I am still in love with you even though I am questioning myself about what real love is. I have been in love with you for what? I don’t know, maybe 4 years now? Maybe less, maybe more”.

This is the shortest answer you can give him. When you are nervous, you over talk. But it’s ok, he knows you. You have to add, you needed to:

“Hobi, I love everything about you. Everything. I know details about you that you probably don’t even know yourself. I love everything, everything about you. I am attracted by every single part of your body. Every little face expression you makes makes my heart flustered. When you smile, I feel warm. I love you, I love you so much”.

“I am so sorry Y/n. It’s just a big mess”. He said, taking his head between his hands, leaning forward”

“I know Hobi”. You caress his hair gently, sliding his locks between your fingers. At this point, there is no need to restrain yourself from touching him, he knows you love him. He sights.

“Why haven't you talk? We would have been together now, a happy couple, living a happy life”.

“Why haven’t YOU, Hoseok? Why?”

You are not the only one involved in this. He had his part to play and he didn’t play it either. You can take your part of responsibilities, not his.

“You want the ugly truth y/n?” He didn’t wait for you to answered. “I always thought you hated me. Well, not hated it’s a big statement to claim but at least that you were not comfortable around me”.

“You are right Hobi, I was not comfortable. I was incapable of getting closer to you. I was scared that you would feel my love and I didn’t want you to know I was in love with you”.

“You can’t love me if you don’t want to be close to me. It makes no sense!”

“Hobi, you have to believe me. I was not touching you because I was scared that if I did, you would feel my love, my desire for you and that you would know the truth. I was scared, I didn’t want you to know the truth at all cost”.

He was very emotive, on the merge to cry. His eyes were teary and when he was not talking he was biting his lips not to sob.

“Hobi, you didn’t talk either. Maybe I loved you more than you loved me”.

He stopped you:

“I was so in love with you, I was waiting for a little sign, something, anything to keep on hoping. But you were so distant. Why? I don’t believe it. I just can’t believe that I almost got you, YOU, the girl that I loved with all my heart. It cannot be for real, destiny made us love each other and finally decided that we were not meant to be. I just can’t believe that”.

He was almost yelling by the end of his speech, unable to hold back tears any longer.

“Y/n, I was in love with you, I was touched by every little gesture you had towards me, shaking inside each time you were smiling. Melting inside each time I saw you laugh. Girl your smile, your delicate hands, your smell, your kindness, your hips, your lips, your generosity, your sense of humor, your intelligence, your strength, your softness, your bambi eyes when you are touched, your sexy moves when you dance, the way you become a powerful goddess on the stage but as soon as the spotlight are off you remain yourself again and act childish, you being a baby koala, the way you always help us put things in perspectives, your toughness against adversity, your calm personality, always thinking before talking on contrary of me, the way you’re provoking your brother… your beautiful and kind heart…”

You had enough, it seems that he was really in love with you after all. No doubt, he felt something.

“Why y/n, tell me why. I need a good reason to have lost you forever because I know I’ve lost you forever now. I know…”. He was almost shaking your shoulders, to make you react. He was crying and it broke your heart to see him like that.

“I was scared that you would reject me”. You said, gently cupping his cheeks, crying with him. He covered your hand with his and he pressed his forehead against yours for the most intimate contact you ever had with him. Your man. Your beautiful man. The one you love with all your heart and all your soul.

That’s it. You just spit it. That’s the reason why, you just realised it the second you said it. You were scared he would not love you back so you prefered to keep your distance instead of taking the risk to get hurt. At the end of the day it couldn’t have been worse because you are now losing on every level. You could never get over him, or in that specific case, be with him. You continued:

“I think that maybe, all the rejection that I had to face when I auditioned to be part of a girl’s group, made me doubt myself. Every fucking time, every time until I met Taemin, I were rejected because of my body. Too fat, too slim, too bony, too thick, too much boobs, not enough boobs, an ugly nose, not enough sharp jawline, too much cheeks. Name it Hobi. I think I felt like I didn’t deserve to be with the beautiful, perfect you. You are so beautiful, you deserved so much prettier than me”.

Big tears were running down on your cheeks, his tears and yours, mixing together as if they knew it’s gonna be the only contact your fluids will have.

What touches you the most, what hurts you the most is that never in that conversation, he tried to have you back. He was talking past tense. That broke you.

“Hobi… Hobi please…” you said, crying.

Please what? You don’t even know yourself. Please hug me? Kiss me? Don’t give up on me? You don’t know. All you can do is cry and say his name over and over again, sobbing. And the more you cried, the more he did, never letting go of your hand in his, softly caressing your cheeks with his forehead with slow, soft strokes , pressing his nose against yours, his nose on your forehead…

“Hobi… tell me…”

He leaned back, looked at you in his eyes. He placed a beautiful, soft and tender kiss on your forehead, leaving his lips pressed on your skin as he answered.

“What?”

“Tell me, why couldn’t that be possible again? Why is this a fatality? Why can’t we start something together, now?”.

You don’t want to beg. You don’t want to, really. But deep inside of you, deep in your guts, there is a voice that keep screaming “please Hobi, love me, please. Love me back”.

“I am not saying it’s possible or impossible. I am lost and I don’t want to drag you down with me, I don’t want to give you false hope. That’s the only reason I am not saying anything about “us” right now. The truth is, I have Rosé in my life now and I’m really, deeply torn apart, I need to take a big step back”.

Both of you stayed silent for a minute or so. Forehead against forehead, hands in hands, breathing in harmony, letting your tears flood your faces. After a few moment like that you told him:

“Hobi, I have my answer now”.

“What? What answered?”

You take a deep breath in, gathering your courage to talk.

“You don’t love me as much as I love you. I was never torn, I never doubt. Not for a nanosecond. You were, you are my one and only, nobody else could have compete against you. Not even my celebrity crush”.

“No. No. No. Don’t give up on me just like that, please. I just don’t know. I am a weak man. I am just a stupid man, I’m so stupid”.

You kissed his forehead, inhaling his smell. You don’t want to let him go, never. But at the same time, you know you have no choice. You need to get over him. You need to heal, you need to recovers from him, take care of your heart or you will die from tje pain. Your broken leg and the lost of your and career is literally nothing compare to your broken heart.

“Hobi, stop. You ain’t stupid and you have all the right in the world to be unsure. I love you Jung Hoseok, I don’t know how I will stop loving you… But I am letting you go”.

“No, please, no…. don’t do that, I love you, I always loved you too, it’s such a mess, please…. no”. He was crying, sobbing. He look broken, dejected.

“Hoseok, if Rosé was in front of you right now, would you act the same? Would you cry like that? Asking her not to give up on you?”

He’s not answering. Is it because he don’t know the answer? Because he really don’t know?

“Hobi, you are torn and you have the right to be. I don’t love you less because of that, that would be too easy, right? But, even if you would answer me that you’re choosing me tonight, I wouldn’t believe you, I would still doubt your feelings for me. I am not going to be a second choice, I don’t want to doubt my man’s love. I don’t want you to impulsively chose me and then regret it. I want to be the one and only in my lover’s heart. Otherwise, I won’t be confident in my relationship.”

You stopped, to make sure he was following. His sad brown eyes glued to yours made you hesitate for a second but you won’t change your mind. You won’t flinch. You know you are taking the good decision. You know that to be happy, you need to go on with your life. His love for you is too uncertain. He’s unable to choose between you and Rosé so you're gonna make the choice for him.

“I wish you will find happiness with her Hobi, really. I wish you will be happy. I love you”.

“Wait, wait, please” he clings to you, his 2 hands catching your nightgown with desperation all over his face.

“What is it?”

“I think we deserve at least one kiss. Please y/n, you can’t say no to that”. He said.

Would it be cheating on Rosé? Of course it would be. Would it be your problem? Absolutely not. Do you care about her feelings if she feels betrayed by that? You don’t give a shit to be honest. You’ve been waiting for your man at least 4 years, you think you deserve a kiss, screw that thief. At the same time, would it hurt you more? Can you be more broken inside? You don’t think it’s possible unless something happens to your family or to your Min-Min princes.

Hoseok sees you analysing the situation. He don’t want to think, be want to act. For him, you both deserve that moment together, a sight of this impossible happiness.

He drop his gaze from your eyes to your lips and he slowly lean in. You can’t resist those lips, you just can’t. That mole, that perfect mole that you’ve been dreaming of almost all your adult life is too tempting to be neglected.

Slowly, you followed his movement and gently, softly, you lean in. You started by brushing your nose against his. When you felt his breath on your skin, you couldn’t wait any longer and you brush your lips against his, taking your time to feel the contact of his lips under yours. He seems paralysed at first, not making a move to kiss you back. You pulled away, unsured. His expression was mostly sad but he smiled at you nevertheless. He then gently placed his left hand on the side of your neck and he tug you in for the most emotional kiss you will ever have in your life, caressing your naked shoulder and arm with his other hand. It was soft, sad and the taste of his tongue awaken all sorts of emotions inside of you. Desire, fever, passion, sadness, love, joy… Still, both of you kept the pace slow, not wanting to rush anything, feeling the moment, living it entirely. You had to do it thought, you had to tease his mole with your tongue. It was your only kiss, you’re gonna take all you can.

When he started to run his fingers on your hair and you started to feel things heating, you pulled back and placed your hands on his.

“Enough Hobi, now go”.

That was it.Your one and only kiss with the man that you love, but will have to forget.

He stood up and walked his way out. He opened the door but before he leaves the room he said:

“I don’t know if I can be happy with her either you know, she’s not you”.

“And I am not her either. You can’t cut us in two, unfortunately. Goodbye my love, please, let me alone now”.

You can see he’s really sad, dejected, lost. He seems as broken as you are. You see it, it’s all over his face. Knowing he’s feeling like that made your heart heavier. But you have to start thinking about yourself now. You have to find a new purpose in your life.

When he closed the door of Tae’s bedroom, you can hear his sobbs. That’s also when you free yours.

[onewfantaesy]

In my country school buses are really stuffy and noisy and just a complete mess but they are really memorable lel the noisy people mostly sit at the back maybe you could write about tiny shy taeminie being forced to sit at the back on his first day with his loud hyungs

Taemin had never taken the bus before. All through elementary school, his mom drove him to school in the mornings and picked him up in the afternoons. But now, on the first day of sixth grade, he had to walk to the bus stop at the end of the block because his mom’s work hours changed. Going into middle school was already scary enough, but now he had to tackle this new hurdle too.

“Taemin! I didn’t know you were taking the bus.”

Taemin turned, and he smiled when he saw Onew walking over to him. 

“I am this year,” Taemin said, and the two of them stood next to each other as they waited for the bus to come. They compared their class schedules with each other, saw that they had homeroom, first, third, and sixth periods together, and they got nervous when the eighth graders who lived on their street came over and started being loud and rowdy. 

When they got on the bus, they hurried to find where Key and Minho were sitting, and they found them toward the back of the bus. A bunch of eighth graders were sitting around them, and it was making Taemin nervous as the bus jolted forward and made its way to the next stop.

“What’s your schedule?” Key asked, leaning over the back of Onew and Taemin’s seat. They both held up their schedules, and Key snatched them to compare them to his and Minho’s schedules.

“We all have the same homeroom!” Key announced. 

At the next stop, a group of boys got on the bus that made Taemin groan and sink in the seat. 

“Look who’s on the bus this year,” Chanyeol called, letting out an obnoxious laugh as he, Baekhyun, and Kyungsoo went to go sit in the second to last row. He reached over, shoved Taemin’s head to the side, and then high-five’d Baekhyun before going to sit down.

Taemin frowned and leaned closer to Onew, and Key kicked his leg out as Chanyeol passed to knock him in the knee. 

“It’s gonna be a long year, isn’t it?” Taemin mumbled.

“Hopefully they won’t be on the bus back home,” Onew mumbled back.

When they all got on the bus at the end of the day, Chanyeol was already there sitting in his spot toward the back of the bus. Taemin groaned and piled in his seat next to Onew. It was going to be a long year indeed.