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imcrushedbyarainbowoffical · 4 years

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Janus’s Playlist Analysis

Since Janus is my favorite Side I thought I’d have some fun and do an analysis of his playlist.

Enjoy~

Black Hole Sun (Bradlee's Postmodern Jukebox, Haley Reinhart)

A. Janus is depressed by his own existence and the existence of others. He doesn't believe anyone in this world is good and wishes a black hole would suck away the pain he feels and the emptiness inside that is filled with nothing but desires and greed. He also misses his youth and yearns for the sweet fruit of the past where everything was easier and you didn't realize how horrible the world truly is.

B. We live in a societyTM

It Seemed Better That Way (Leonard Cohen)

A. Janus's view on religion and faith, in general, is that it's painful and earns you nothing but confusion and doubt. One can believe that these things make them a good person or that there is truth in the Bible, but no one really knows for sure.

B. Even religion is filled with hypocrisy and lies and no matter how faithful one is to something, it doesn't count for the many hardships and broken hearts one faces on account of that faith.

Anywhere (The Scarring Party)

A. This is a prod at optimism and Patton, as Janus doesn't believe the world is beautiful despite what is said by Parents, Teachers, and Priests. It's a dog eat dog world out there and if one tries to fit themselves into the box society has made for them, they will be fortunate sure, but will also be sent to an early grave once they're no longer needed.

B. Janus doesn't want Thomas to star in society's tv show but rather be the star of his own show. He wants Thomas to live as he wants and to be happy without trying to hold onto pointless optimism.

Talking at the Same Time (Tom Waits)

A. You can't trust anyone but yourself, as people have a tendency to push others down in order to get what they want or to gain some sort of control. So it's either you trust yourself and fight or you trust others and die.

B. Janus feels as though he and the others got the short end of the stick once Virgil got accepted and knows that they will have to fight in order to get a seat at the table.

all the good girls go to hell (Billie Eilish)

A. "In an interview with Vulture, Finneas confirmed the track is indeed about climate change. I read somewhere that some fans think that ‘All the Good Girls Go to Hell’ is about climate change. I love that they think that.” I was like, “That’s ‘cause it is.” - Genius Lyrics

So uh, "trees....?"

This is Janus's spiel on how the world is burning and climate change is happening but no one seems to care.

B. Janus believes that no matter how "good" you are or pretend to be it won't matter in the end because any person can lie and say they're good when really they aren't. Plus, since your going to sin no matter what you do, what's the point of going to extreme measures to be "perfect" when your wasting time and energy to do so.

Denial (The Vaccines)

A. Janus knows what Thomas is capable of and wants him to hold the world in his hands and to be so much more. He also knows that Thomas is lost and is trying to provide some direction to him but is always ignored or turned away as a villain.

B. Janus is denying his feelings about Virgil and is hanging on by a thread. He knows that Virgil wanted so much more and despite everything Janus did for him, it wasn't enough. Now, Janus wants to talk to Virgil and doesn't want to be shut out without explaining his true feelings.

Trust in Me (Scarlet Johanson)

A. Janus wants Thomas to trust in him and know that he is safe as long as he is around.

B. As Deceit, it is easy to manipulate people and get them to do what he wants.

Razzle Dazzle (Richard Gere)

A. In SVS, Janus believes that by putting on a show/scenario he can easily persuade everyone to go to the callback.

B. Janus is a dramatic boiTM and believes that by being dramatic and overzealous, he can hide his true nature (and perhaps his insecurities too).

When the Chips Are Down (Anais Mitchell and The Haden Triplets)

A. Janus has always had to trust himself when it came to decisions and fighting for what he believes in.

B. Janus believes it's important to ensure your own survival before ensuring the survival of others. When your own life is at stake and/or there's a big opportunity you have to think about yourself and be "selfish."

Mandy Goes to Med School (The Dresden Dolls)

A. Janus doesn't think he's really qualified to do his job and perhaps wonders if he's doing anything right.

B. He's good at faking it until he makes it and doing things on the fly.

I Put A Spell On You (Nina Simone)

A. Janus is a huge flirt and just likes playing around

B. He has a crush/affinity towards one of the Sides and likes them but they perhaps don't reciprocate the feeling.

Evil Night Together (Jill Tracey)

A. Janus loves doing evil things and enjoys being a villain.

B. (Platonic or Romantic) This is Janus and Remus's song and how they enjoy spending time together. Janus and Remus also like to flirt and talk dirty to eachother. (Also, can you imagine these two dancing to this song? That would be so cool!).

Cabaret: Don't Tell Mama (John Kander)

A. Janus is good at keeping secrets and fits into whatever role he must play.

B. This could be in reference to Thomas's sexuality and the fact that he was raised Catholic and thus being homosexual is a taboo. So, Janus kept the fact that Thomas was Gay a secret for fear his parents and/or society would get mad/reject him.

You're A Cad (Fiona Apple)

A. Janus sees through the lies Virgil is telling himself about being good and forcing himself to be better.

B. Janus knows he's worse than Virgil but also knows he isn't lying to himself in trying to be solely good. He's always going to have an element of darkness in him and unlike Virgil, he's learned to accept it.

As Far As I Can See (Phantogram)

A. No one cares about the others, as they're all seen as evil and villainous. So, whether there crying out or are being pushed down to the deepest darkest levels, no one will ever be there to save them.

B. Janus doesn't believe he's loved and or is needed since Thomas doesn't listen to him. He feels like he's falling down a plight of stairs and/or is crying out in pain, yet, Thomas and the Sides push him away without a second thought.

Criminal (Fiona Apple)

A. Janus is able to use his charisma to get what he wants and to be heard in some capacity.

B. He feels like a criminal and doesn't believe he can ever have redemption. He's sinned against so many of the Sides that he feels he can't ever be "forgiven" or "loved" because of what he's done. Yet, he does care about the Sides and Thomas, he just doesn't know how to show it without everything coming out wrong.

Change (Lana Del Rey)

A. Janus can feel a change within Thomas but knows it will take a while for it to come, as the Sides have yet to truly understand each other.

B. Janus is a tired snake boyTM and feels that change is coming but finds it meaningless and pointless. He wants to be more honest and to be able to hold Thomas up but at the same time is so bitter about everything he's losing his will to live. He wants to be here but at the same time doesn't understand what any of it's for. Besides, if no one cares about him then why should he care about himself?

The Devil’s in the Details (Bright Eyes)

A. Janus is starting to be accepted but is scared because he knows that things aren't that easy and everything can fall apart at the drop of a hat. He's trying to be better but because of his own duality, he knows he is only fooling himself into being good when in reality he may always be a villain.

B. Janus knows that he's wronged Virgil in some way but can't seem to make it better and everything has only gotten worse. He wants Virgil back and for them to forgive each other but knows he may not get what he wants without some significant change/understanding.

Come Little Children (Erutan)

A. He is responsible for taking care of the others and as such tries to keep them from harm. Also, Janus knows that Thomas would never accept them and so decided to keep the others hidden away.

B. Janus is the protector and the leader of the others and is now starting to let the come out to play.

Into The Unknown (The Blasting Company)

A. Janus misses Virgil a lot and likes to remember the adventures Remus, Virgil, Orange, and he used to have.

B. Janus is nostalgic for the past and misses the sweet bliss of youth, where the world was deemed beautiful in his eyes and filled with wonder. During a time where friendship and love were something, he could hold onto and not yet know that these memories would be nothing but lovely lies in the future.

#sanders sides #remus sanders #virgil sanders #deceit sanders #patton sanders #ts deceit #ts janus #janus sanders #ts sanders sides

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idolizerp · 6 years

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LOADING INFORMATION ON JAWBREAKER’S MAIN RAP ELEANOR MOON...

IDOL DETAILS

STAGENAME: Ellie CURRENT AGE: 24 DEBUT AGE: 19 TRAINEE SINCE AGE: 16 COMPANY: KJH SECONDARY SKILL: CF modeling

IDOL PROFILE

NICKNAME(S): n/a INSPIRATION: back in america, ellie discovered her love of rapping and after regular trips to korea to visit family, she discovered the rap side of kpop. this inspired her to audition and better explore that side of heritage. SPECIAL TALENTS:

games: it’s well known that ellie is competitive, and she seems to back this up by excelling in most games she’s presented with on variety shows.

staring/don’t laugh competitions: she’ll hold the gaze of a host without blinking, without laughing or smiling, or any other challenge they give her involving keeping a straight face.

english: obviously, growing up in america, her english is flawless so it’s

NOTABLE FACTS:

came in fourth place on the 2016 season of unpretty rapstar.

big fan of the LA dodgers, often seen wearing one of their hats.

can’t cook if her life depended on it.

IDOL GOALS

SHORT-TERM GOALS:

After joining KJH and being pushed to promote more than she’s used to, Ellie feels like they actually want her to succeed. It’s been in talks to let her potentially have a solo career, and soon. Sometime within the next year, she hopes to launch that career and release her first single.

LONG-TERM GOALS:

No group lasts forever, Ellie knows this, but she wants to last forever. She wants her solo career to take off and to carry her for the rest of her life. She loves the spotlight. She wants to become an icon in Korea, like BoA or IU. Except for rapping, obviously.

IDOL IMAGE

the marketing team at singularity have an idea in mind when they hear about the new foreign trainee. silly american, still getting accustomed to the language and the culture; it was a stereotype they assumed she’d slide into easily. when word of this reaches her ears, it’s obvious to her that they haven’t done their research. that’s not who she is; she’s not even sure she could pretend to be that. they have yet to speak to her about it, and it doesn’t look like she’s debuting soon, so she does everything in her power to change their mind. she knows she has to be respectful of her new company. her father’s words ring sound in her mind: “don’t speak back to anyone like you spoke to your teachers here; you’ll be sent back home without a second thought”. more than anything she wants to succeed and debut. but she decides she needs to be bolder. she speaks to her superiors with a surprising confidence. in any class or lesson, she’s always at the front, eager to learn and even more eager to impress. eleanor knows she’s more than a stereotype; she just has to show them.

when it’s time to debut, the image they’ve come up for her isn’t one she would pick for herself, but it’s better than the original idea. there’s an emphasis on respect (that’s not a surprise to eleanor); they’re the newcomers on the scene, they have to earn their spot. they want people to like them, to feel like they’re at the same level. be humble. they know eleanor has a tendency to be brash, and though they claim they want her ‘true personality to shine’ they also want to reign her in. she can come off as straightforward and a little gutsy, but there are boundaries. don’t insult, don’t offend, don’t show the group or company in a bad light. everything in moderation.

they decide to play up her underdog story. her parents, korean immigrants wanting a better life for their future children than they were able to provide in their previous circumstances. a girl raised in a different country wanting to get back to her korean roots, feeling a calling of some sort to be apart of it all. rap competitions she came in second, never first, so she pushed herself to be better. to be the best. and here she was, finally succeeding and debuting as a main rapper. achieving her dream. it’s a story spun to inspire girls around the world, that anything is possible. ellie proves to them that she’s not so different from them.

eleanor thinks higher of herself than most of the world does, though she doesn’t always let it show. she’s been quoted claiming that she’s the self-proclaimed visual of her.oine, and the true reason for their success. no one is ever entirely sure if she’s joking or not, or if this is all an act. she doesn’t want them to know the answer. it rubs some the wrong way, and others think it’s cute and naive. when asked who she’d want to trade places with for a day, she said ‘no one’ because she can’t imagine being anyone better than who she already is. her favorite part of any comeback is her rap (“it basically defines the whole song”, she claims). a meeting with her management and a very firm slap on the wrists follows.

this gains her backlash. it’s been there since day one, but this really stirs it up. why does she get to be the main rapper? what makes her specially? the other members are more talented than she is, she reads. they have far more experience, and she can’t deny that. one of them was raised by a rapper/producer. three years feels like an eternity to eleanor, but there are trainees that have been working for over six years and still haven’t managed to debut. what does she have that they lack? while she wants to scream back that she has talent, passion, and drive, she keeps her mouth closed because it’s what she’s supposed to do. when asked to comment on her criticism, she just smiles and promises fans that she’s working her hardest to be the best she can for them. when has she become this person?

despite her big mouth and sometimes too-much confidence, she is depicted caring for her members. she may let out a huff or roll her eyes when one hugs her, but she can be caught passionately cheering them on in any ventures outside of the group or out at dinner with one of them, letting them pick off of her plate. she’s not motherly of the younger girls, and not a maknae-type by any means. more of the teenage daughter who acts too cool for her family but deep down would do anything for them.

things change when their label goes south and they get bought out. her.oine is no more. who knows what their new concept will be. from what she’s told, the changes aren’t too drastic. it’ll still be a girl crush group (thank god), she’ll still be the main rapper (thank GOD). but as far image, they want her to play up the foreigner card. talk about los angeles and where she’s from. not in the same way singularity did. she doesn’t have to play dumb, she already has her image and for now it’s fine. they don’t want to stir up any trouble before they can get the group going again. it’s just that atlas has been so successful overseas that kjh hopes that jawbreaker having an openly foreign member will help bridge that gap for them too.

what they want eleanor to be and who she wants to show the world are completely different people though. her confidence is obvious to anyone who interacts with her. it oozes out of her pores, out of her mouth, impossible to ignore. she’s someone who knows what she wants and is committed to getting it. she’s the girl in school you were afraid to talk to. the one you thought just might bully you but instead empowers you to be a stronger version of yourself. the male fans would love her for her body, her rapping skills, and the not-so-subtle winks she hands out like party favors. the girls would see the more dangerous side of them in eleanor, the side they wish they were confident enough to show to the world.

but for now, she waits. she waits for their next concept, for the reviews to come in, for a chance to be a little more herself. it seems just out of grasp, but she’s fighting for jawbreaker’s success and the freedom she misses.

IDOL HISTORY

eleanor is practically born with middle child syndrome. she has an older brother her family adores, he’s a natural at everything he tries. the only thing she’s good at is talking. the babbling starts at an early age and her parents wish they could go back to a day when she didn’t make a sound, because now she never stops. and when she learns a word, three more come quickly after and before they know it, she’s talking their ears off again. it’s nonsense of course, but it’s never ending. as a child, she’s needy and can’t seem to entertain herself; she craves the attention. on the day she turns three, her birthday party is canceled as her mom is rushed to the hospital prematurely. she returns with two more kids, a boy and a girl. everyone is fussing over the new additions instead of bringing her presents and talking to her. at that age she doesn’t understand why, but ever since, her special day wasn’t just for her. she had two others to constantly share with. share toys, share her parents love and attention. she had never been a fan of sharing. a young eleanor tells her parents very boldly that she hates her new siblings before slamming the door, causing the babies to cry.

at home, it’s all korean all the time. they speak it because it’s easier for her parents, and to make sure they don’t forget that part of who they are. eleanor’s mother cooks traditional korean food, just like her mother did. she tries to get her kids interested in it and her oldest is a natural, of course. eleanor can’t seem to get the hang of it or find any interest in it, so she’s shooed out of the kitchen. a bitter scowl is present across her face during dinner. the only time when she feels truly included is during their summers in daegu. she cherishes the time she gets to spend with her grandmother, because at times it feels like her grandmother is the only one who cherishes her.

her father is a professor at a local university, teaching korean language and asian studies. her mother is a pediatric nurse. with two parents that work full time and three other siblings, it’s near impossible for eleanor to get any alone time, or even attention, from her parents. so, like a true middle child, she begins to act out. at first it’s talking disrespectfully to teachers. she even writes a rap about the vice principle and his snaggle-tooth and performs it for everyone at recess. once she decides to spend a week pretending she suddenly forgot english, which prompted a parent-teacher meeting. as she gets older, things get worse. showing up late to class and telling her teacher to ‘fuck off’ when asked where she was. skipping class altogether to hang out with the kids that finally took notice of her. she was suspended for underage smoking in the school parking lot. if anything, her parents were stressed and angry. but they were also busy, so her punishments were minimal and poorly policed.

the crowd she finds herself involved with aren’t exactly stand-up citizens, but they give her the attention she craves. eleanor sneaks out most nights to meet up with them. it’s something new every night, but it almost always involves alcohol, cigarettes, and something illegal. whether that be drugs, breaking into someone’s house, graffiti, or spending time with boys who are too old to have her best interest at heart. she’s spiraling, flying head first down the wrong path, and no one seems to notice.

her favorite nights involve taking a bus down to lincoln heights to watch underground rappers perform and battle. thanks to her friends, her main interests lie in rap and hiphop, so she’s not foreign to this style, but seeing it live is something else. it awakens something in eleanor she wasn’t sure she’d ever feel: passion. it’s during a trip that a friend encourages her to enter an amateur competition. she does so with surprising confidence for someone so young and is eliminated the first round. laughed off the makeshift stage. her quick temper boils up and she’s furious and embarrassed at the same time, claiming it wasn’t her fault that she did so bad; that person she was against COULDN’T have been a beginner. despite her claims, she begins to practice, and practice hard. she enters as many competitions as she can, missing more and more school. but she’s getting better and that’s what counts, placing higher and higher.

eleanor’s grades begin to drop and that raises a red flag to her parents. rules are stricter, she can’t sneak out anymore. there will be no more absences from school and she’ll come straight home afterwards. she’s finally getting the attention she craves but it feels all wrong. something is missing and she knows exactly what that is.

it’s one of these friends that tells her about the audition. the boy and his sister are older than her, but two of the only korean friends she has. they were the ones to introduce her to kpop and khiphop to begin with. some of it is ridiculous, some of it flows better than american hiphop, but it all piques her curiosity. she has no idea what groups are under this label, singularity, or anything about it, other than it’s kpop. somewhere deep inside, this audition is her only chance at freedom. life at home with parents who don’t understand is a prison. out in the industry, she’ll be able to do what she loves. maybe it’s not originally how she imagine herself, but it’s s step in the right direction, the only direction that makes sense to her right now. she signs up for the audition and prepares a song in english for them, and one in korean.

eleanor acts unsurprised when she gets offered a chance to audition again in seoul. the extensive time spent with family in korea makes it easy to get her parents to agree to let her go. and when she gets offered a spot in the company, she tells her parents it’s exactly what she needs to get on the ‘right path’. they have no problem with it, though she had hoped they would act a little sadder to see their oldest daughter move out of the country before she’s even eighteen.

trainee life isn’t at all what eleanor expected. she didn’t know it was going to be so… strict. she thought she had left this life behind in california. she also didn’t expect to have so much competition. the whining is short-lived (much to the gratitude of the other trainees). she knows what she needs to do to get to where she needs to be. so she trains day in and day out. she barely eats. she’s at the gym constantly. every tidbit of adive they give her she gobbles up, eager to improve. she’s ruthless and some of the other trainees are rubbed the wrong way. she doesn’t care. she doesn’t care about anyone other than herself and it shows. others aren’t the biggest fan of her personality, though in front of her superiors, she puts on a kinder face. her temper again gets the better of her and she yells at a younger girl for accidentally tripping her. while she knows deep down her reaction was uncalled for, her pride keeps her from giving a sincere apology until she spots the girl crying one day. she offers the girl a hidden candy bar and mumbles a nearly incomprehensible but sincere “sorry”.

korean classes weren’t anything eleanor had expected when she moved. she thought her korean was good. great, actually. but that was just her over-confidence doing her a disservice. there are things that only come with a native language that they need to pound into her. her dialect skews some words that they want her to be clearer on. she needs to know what idioms work and what don’t, and the ones that are special just to the korean language. she has to finish school still which is done locally, and it nearly feels overwhelming. there’s so much about history and tradition her family hadn’t taught her, and here she was trying to play catch up while also training. she’s constantly tired, making her even more snappy and short with the other trainees. they just think it’s her personality, but really she’s worried about whether she’ll be able to succeed or not. maybe she’s not cut out for this, maybe she can’t do it. maybe she should go back home and just be a teacher even though she’s not the biggest fan of kids. doubts aren’t foreign to eleanor and at times she has trouble pushing through them.

her training doesn’t lightening up as a year passes, and then six months, and then six more. she’s two years in when she nearly blows her voice. her practicing is consistent until she wakes up one morning unable to speak. her stomach drops and her heart breaks just a little. is this the end for her? a quick meeting at the doctors proves she’ll be okay, but she gets put on voice rest for a week. she only lasts five days before she’s back rapping, a little more cautious, but just as determined.

it’s another year before eleanor debuts, with a nickname not foreign to her. her dancing and rapping has improved, she’s proven to be a talented and passionate trainee, so ellie is debuting as the main rapper of the new girl group, her.oine. when she’s finally in private, she bursts out in tears. all her hard work was finally paying off. it was her first real glimpse at any kind of freedom. she loves the concept, loves her role. feels… okay about the other girls. she’s never been great at sharing the spotlight, but at least she feels important here. and over time she warms up to the other members.

she still has a ways to go. she’s met with endless criticism from fans and critics alike. she’s not good enough, she’s foreign, she’s just another ‘idol rapper’ and not even a great one at that. she’s boring, she’s rude. anything they can think of comes out and she feels the tears start, but she swallows them. this isn’t the time to wallow in self pity. all she can do is try to prove them wrong, even when she really wants to give up.

singularity gives her one chance to prove herself. they don’t seem to invest much in her or the group, they don’t seem to care about them. so she’s surprised when they meet her halfway and both parties agree to let her go out for unpretty rapstar. it’s at least… something. it gives her something to do while the group sits idle. always the competitive type, she tries her hardest. but her korean is still not good enough. she doesn’t win, doesn’t even come in second place. she finishes in fourth place which she’s told is pretty good but it’s not good enough for her. she vows to practice harder, to not be so humiliated again. little does she know that her time as part of ‘her.oine’ is limited.

the always-confident ellie feels her confidence falter when their company goes under. for a brief moment, the group’s future is uncertain. her future is uncertain. until they’re told that they’re the one good thing to come out of singularity. kjh global creative is going to take them on with some minor changes. for the better, they say. she’s very skeptical of the company, of what they have prepared, and even of their new name (jawbreaker is a dumb name, if you ask her). but she doesn’t have a choice. eleanor is ready to get back in the spotlight, no matter what it takes.

and she does. they do. their debut song doesn’t win any awards, but it’s good. it’s well received. and she surprises herself by loving it. ellie’s riding a high, but it’s not over yet. kjh has them preparing for a comeback already, much to the group’s surprise. she’s not used to this kind of attention, this kind of investment, but it’s what she’s always wanted and she’s thriving.

#id.bio #id.kjh #id.jawbreaker #id.son naeun #id.wild&free

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sigmabetadine-blog · 7 years

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4th Book: “Tuesdays With Morrie” by Mitch Albom

Summarizer - Jezreel Kris Puda

Tuesdays with Morrie is a true story about sportswriter Mitch Albom and his favorite college professor Morrie Schwartz. During Albom’s undergraduate years at Brandeis University, when he takes every class taught by his mentor, he and Schwartz form a bond that goes beyond the typical student/teacher relationship.

After graduation, Albom promises to stay in touch with his professor and moves to New York City with the intention of pursuing a career as a professional musician. He spends several frustrating years working odd jobs and wondering what he is doing wrong. He loses touch with all of his college friends and with Schwartz. His musical dreams are dying a frustrating death, and he feels like a failure for the first time in his life.

Around that time, a favorite uncle passes away from cancer at the age of forty-four. This frightens Albom into action. He returns to school and earns graduate degrees in journalism and business administration from Columbia University in New York. Albom accepts a job as a sports writer and begins working long, grueling hours, determined not to end up at a corporate job he hates like his uncle did. He bounces around the country working for different newspapers and magazines before finally settling at The Detroit Free Press, where his career really begins to take off.

As Albom’s career grows, so do his income and his material possessions. The more he gets, the more he wants and the harder he works. During this time, he also gets married. His wife wants to start a family, and he promises her “someday.” One evening while flipping channels on the television, Albom catches the introduction to Nightline and hears the name Morrie Schwartz. His long-forgotten favorite professor is the subject of a Ted Koppel interview. Albom watches in shock as he learns Schwartz is dying of ALS, or Lou Gehrig’s disease.

Shortly after learning the diagnosis, Schwartz makes an important decision. He isn’t going to hide behind his illness. He isn’t going to be ashamed or afraid of dying. He’s been a teacher all his life and decides he’ll teach one final class, teaching his students how to die. That’s where Schwartz’s old student and friend Mitch Albom comes in. After seeing the Nightline interview, Albom visits Schwartz and makes another promise to keep in touch.

A few weeks later, Albom’s newspaper goes on strike, and he is out of a job. Left with too much time on his hands and too many unsettling thoughts in his head, he returns to Massachusetts to see Schwartz. In fact, he returns to Massachusetts every Tuesday until the end of Schwartz’s life.

After a couple of visits, Albom begins recording their talks, with Schwartz’s permission and his encouragement. He wants to share this journey with the world and knows that Albom can help him reach beyond the walls to which his disease has confined him. For the next fourteen weeks, Schwartz and Albom discuss everything from regrets and death to money and marriage, from family to forgiveness. Their conversations and the insights they give into the way Schwartz has lived his life and accepts his death become the foundation around which Tuesdays with Morrie is written.

Comment: I found it very sad when I was summarizing the story because I discovered it was a true story which happened to Albom but I admire him for being brave in writing such a novel.

Mary Den Lea S. Duron - Discussion Director

1. What can you say about the book “Tuesdays with Morrie”?

Kaye Fanggolo: Tuesdays with Morrie is an inspiring story that teaches us to live and love to the fullest every day. Reading this book is realizing a lot of things especially about life, living and death.

Benita Benito: I thought this book would make me feel bored but as I went further reading, it made me realize a lot of values that should be given importance and application in real life especially the moments with our families.

Darlene Mamoso: I enjoyed reading Tuesdays with Morrie very much. It has been written quite well and has a great lesson to learn about. There are many wonderful quotes about life that would motivate and make a reflection about your own life and how you’re living it.

Ezel Mae Polo: I really like this book, it reminded me some of the important points in life. I suggest that people should read this book because it gives lessons and realizations.

Aiziah Usop: This book reviewed my perspective in life. I reminisced how I decided to live my life. I really appreciate the author of this book because it is well-written and very comprehensible.

Jezreel Kris Puda: Tuesdays with Morrie is a life changing book. While reading this book I realized that no matter how much we are trialed in life, everything must go on.

Mary Den Lea Duron: Tuesdays with Morrie is an inspirational book by which people can relate about life, realizations about living and the circumstances that revolve around it. Indeed, it is a wonderful life-learning novel well-written by Mitch Albom.

2. How can you describe Morrie as a character?

Kaye Fanggolo: Morrie is a wise teacher. He offers a lot of insights learned from life. Morrie is right about a lot of things, but he’s missing the boat on the most important lesson of them all. He doesn’t mention Jesus, the ultimate answer to all the questions.

Benita Benito: For me, Morrie is a great mentor. He seemed to have imparted important learning and affection to his students especially to Mitch.

Darlene Mamoso: Well, Morrie is a man of great affection to other people, passionate at what he is doing and wise at life’s circumstances.

Aiziah Usop: Morrie is a happy and contented man of his age and physical condition. He is also brave at anticipating death sooner or later compared to other old sick men who are frustrated and self-pitious.

Ezel Mae Polo: Morrie Schwartz is a bright, decent and joyful person. He simply love life and the path of living it. He knows how to control emotions by reciprocating physical depression into joyful dying.

Jezreel Kris Puda: Morrie is a great teacher and a dignified man until his death. He became an inspiration for Mitch. His passion for teaching and living is undeniably worth-learning from.

Mary Den Lea Duron: The main character, Morrie Schwartz, has portrayed himself with dignity and contentment about life. He showed how joyful he was about living that even death cannot defeat him. Indeed, he is a wonderful person, a teacher and a friend worth to be remembered.

Comment: Our Discussion Director formulated relevant questions which led us to deeper thinking about the whole concept of the novel and understanding the kind of character that Morrie Schwartz has.

Aiziah Shehanie T. Usop - Literary Luminary

“Do I wither up and disappear, or do I make the best of my time left?”

Morrie is very positive person because when he asked this question to himself, he said that he would not wither and he would not be ashamed of dying. Instead, he want to become a man with purpose. He wants everyone to learn from him. In short, he wants to be an inspiration.

“Accept what you are able to do and what you are not able to do. Accept the past as past, without denying it or discarding it. Learn to forgive yourself and to forgive others. Don’t assume that it’s too late to get involved.”

As I read this passage from Morrie, I was really captured. Coming from a man who has fatal illness, it is quiet amusing. Very positive person. The way he accept the thins that is happening to him makes him more inspiring to others. In this passage, it’s just showing that, we must live life to the fullest, without hatreds, should not say that our life is for nothing because we all have purpose and most especially live life without regrets.

“I want to live. So far, I’ve been able to do it. Will I be able to continue? I don’t know. But I’m betting on myself that I will.”

It is just but normal to a person who have a fatal illness to be bitter and angry in life. They have a lot of questions and fear and they are having this feeling of self-pity and Morrie is not an exception. He also encounter this feeling but instead of giving’up, he’ll tell himself to fight and live a life without that feeling. Though he knows already what is his condition, he’s still giving himself some words of wisdom that will be his inspiration to live.

“I maybe dying, but I am surrounded by loving, caring souls.”

Morrie, despite of his illness, his family never gives up on him. Instead they became more stronger and eager to help Morrie live a normal life. They never fail to visit him when they have time and share some inspirational message to each other. The love of a family is truly unconditional.

Comment: Ate Aiziah stated the passages and explained well the meaning of the passage. I appreciated it so much.

Character Captain - Darlene Mamoso

Mitch Albom - Morrie’s former student at Brandeis University, and the narrator of the book. After having abandoned his dreams of becoming a famous musician, he is disgusted by his desire for financial success and material wealth, though neither fill the void and unhappiness he feels. He has been working himself nearly to death, and suddenly finds himself out of a job when the staff at the newspaper he writes for decides to strike. Each Tuesday, he learns from Morrie, his that he needs to reassess his life, and to value love over money, and happiness over success.

Morrie Schwartz - Mitch’s favorite professor from Brandeis University, and the focus of the book, Morrie now suffers from ALS, a debilitating, incurable disease which ravages his body, but, cruelly, leaves him intellectually lucid. He had taught sociology at Brandeis, and continues to teach it to Mitch, instructing him on “The Meaning of Life,” and how to accept death and aging. After a childhood in which affection was largely absent, he thrives on physical contact as a baby would. He has a passion for dancing and music, and is quick to cry, especially since the onset of his disease. He does not suffocate his emotions, but shares them openly, and rejects the popular cultural norms in favor of creating his own system of beliefs. Mitch portrays him as a man of ultimate wisdom.

Ted Koppel - One of the most famous living television interviewers, Koppel conducts three interviews with Morrie for the news show “Nightline.” He is surprised when Morrie asks him personal questions just after they have met, though he immediately seems to like Morrie, and eventually grows to call him a friend. He is moved almost to tears during his last interview with Morrie, having deconstructed what Morrie had called his “narcissistic” television personality.

Charlotte - Morrie’s caring wife, who, at his insistence, keeps her job as a professor at M.I.T. throughout Morrie’s illness.

Janine - Mitch’s patient wife who willingly takes a phone call from Morrie, whom she has never met, and insists upon joining Mitch on his next Tuesday visit. Although she usually does not sing upon request, she does for Morrie, and moves him to tears with her beautiful voice.

Peter - Mitch’s younger brother who lives in Spain. Peter flies to various European cities seeking treatment for his pancreatic cancer, though he refuses any help from his family, who he has for the most part estranged himself from. He is reluctant when Mitch first tries to reestablish a relationship with him, but eventually warms.

Charlie - Morrie’s dispassionate father who immigrated to America to escape the Russian Army. Charlie raises his children on the Lower East Side of Manhattan, and works in the fur business, though he seldom finds jobs and earns barely enough money to feed his family. He shows Morrie and his brother David little attention, and no affection whatsoever, and insists that Morrie keep his mother’s death a secret from David, as he wants his son to believe that his stepmother, Eva, is his biological mother. He dies after having run away from muggers, and Morrie must travel to New York to identify his body at the city morgue.

David - Morrie’s younger brother who, after their mother’s death, is sent with Morrie to a small hotel in the woods of Connecticut. There, he develops polio, seemingly just after he and Morrie have spent a night frolicking outside in the rain. Although his paralysis has nothing to do with their night in the rain, Morrie and blames himself for David’s paralysis.

Eva - The kind, caring immigrant woman who Charlie marries after Morrie’s mother dies. She gives Morrie and his brother David the love and affection they have so longed for, and instills in Morrie his love of books and desire for education.

Maurie Stein - A good friend of Morrie’s who sends some of Morrie’s aphorisms to a Boston Globe reporter who eventually publishes a feature story on Morrie. The reporter’s article prompts Ted Koppel to ask Morrie for an interview.

Norman - An old friend of Morrie’s who he has long been estranged from. He had been an artist, and had sculpted a bust of Morrie, a deft depiction of his features. He eventually moved away, and shortly thereafter, did not send his regards to Morrie or Charlotte although he knew that Charlotte would be undergoing a serious surgery. Because of his carelessness, Morrie forfeits his friendship with him and refuses to accept his apology, which he regrets, especially after his death a few years following their break up.

Connie - Morrie’s home health aide who is always there to assist Morrie in going to the bathroom, getting into his chair, and eating his meals. She is in disbelief when O.J. Simpson is voted not guilty by the court jury.

Al Axelrad - A rabbi from Brandeis and a long-time friend of Morrie’s. He performs Morrie’s funeral service.

Rob and Jon - Morrie’s two adult sons who, though they live far, often travel to Boston to visit Morrie, especially as his condition worsens.

Tony - Morrie’s home care worker who helps him in and out of his swimming suit.

Comment: She satisfactorily collected all the characters in the story and explained well their roles in a chronological order.

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madam-tay · 8 years

Text

Five times you’ve given speeches thanking people for the statues that were in your hand, now in a box because your mother wouldn’t let you sell them. There are 1,098 times some magazine, interviewer, newscaster, or youtube film maker praised you and your genius. And none of that makes a fucking god damn difference.

Xavier Évrard Lestrange has become a synonym for a break down. Someone who had so much and spoiled it all.

It starts with the sun. It’s too hot on the pavement as his mother drags him to another studio. If they don’t want him in a commercial for diapers for four year olds who have yet to learn bladder control she’ll find another commercial for some product that does. “Je ne veux pas aller Mama.” She mumbles back in French, words that sometimes get mixed into his English in his auditions. Each word that doesn’t sound like the American English of his LA peers earns him a sharp pinch. The ones on his foot are the worst.

His first role is in a French-American production. The producer sees something in him and maybe it will make his mother happy and keep his parents together. But one movie is not enough. She wants more, more from her little Xavie. The big gifts from his paycheck go to her fancy dresses and cars rather than his bedroom.

On some sets there are children the same age, playmates in trailers. Those are his favorite movies, the kid classics instead of adult movies. There are no children in adult movies and his time off set is spent with a tutor who doesn’t understand why he can’t learn from her lectures and textbook readings.

He is the reason for the divorce. It’s something his mother always blames on him, but while it is a true fact, it is not the way she thinks. His father, Charles Lestrange is sick of seeing his blond haired son unhappy. He is sick of listening to his wife prattle on and knowing that every dollar was going to her lifestyle and not his son who was working for it.

And yet the court believes Xavier’s mother, that she spent all of the time and effort to her son’s career to better him. Still, they get joint custody and Charles sneaks in that at least half of every movie profit goes to a trust fund.

The young boy wants to act. He likes being in movies, likes going to the park and having kids recognize him. He just likes the production of it all. It’s like being a wizard telling a story in bits and pieces and having it all come together so beautifully in ways normal people will never understand.

An awkwardly shaped boy turns into a teenage heartthrob in a story of the ugly duckling that only Hollywood could create. He begins staring in PG-13 features and wanting to use his money on things like pot and cars now that he has his license. His father gives him an allowance, but the answer to any lavish purchases is always no. No, a Lestrange does not sink to reckless behavior. When the son brings up his mother, Charles’ stiff upper lip responds that she was never a true Lestrange. Her new last name with her new husband proves it.

Girls love boys who can speak French, everyone keeps telling him, but he doesn’t bring up a love life when people ask. He has some friends from movie sets he hangs with, and that’s enough for Xavier. He’s making a name for himself, becoming a loud and obnoxious teenager. He wants to do a movie that means something, that’s more than just red carpets with screaming fourteen-year-old girls. He wants something that makes a fucking difference. He’s the stupid blonde, the type casted jock. He wants to be more than that.

He hits 18 and his father still won’t let him get to the trust fund. He has to wait. Thirty. Twelve more fucking years until he can prove himself to his father that all the money he earned as a child will be put to good use.

But he has access to the money he earns now so he stops looking for indie movies with purpose and instead pursues the big blockbusters, the ones that offer him millions of dollars to star in. He wants the money, wants to do with it what he wants. The drugs he likes are expensive to keep up with the friends he makes on set. They’re bad influences, but what does he care? They’re the closest things to friends he has.

There is nothing you can hide from the cameras, at least that’s what he thought. And then his biggest secret has yet to be talked about. The nice blonde roommate is a good distraction for them. A few years after he can legally drink and they’re already talking about him getting married. Xavier and Amelia go everywhere together and while he won’t say a word, the tabloids explode when there’s a ten-carat diamond on her finger.

He comes home to red. Bodies mangled and open the real thing is so much worse than the movie portrayal. He calls the police, voice strained and crying. His hands are covered in blood. It’s hard to focus from his high.

They call him this generations’ OJ Simpson. A man goes into a jealous rage and kills his fiancé and her lover. It’s the type of story that writes itself. He’s arrested before the police leave his house. Everyone wants an interview, his side of the story, but he keeps himself tight lipped. He doesn’t want to speak to anyone. The only people he speaks to are his father and the lawyers he pays for.

The jury lets him off. Of course they do because he never fucking killed her in the first place. Amelia was his best friend, her relationship with Arthur was the best thing for her. He was happy for her, ecstatic that they were going to get married. That big diamond ring on her finger wasn’t from him, though he did buy it for her fiancé.

But the real reason is the defense they built up, the secret he finally spills. He gets up on the stand and when his lawyer asks if he and Amelia has ever slept together his answer is automatically no. He swallows before he finishes his statement, “Because I have known that I am a homosexual since I was sixteen.” Seven lovers are brought to the stand, people he never wanted in the limelight. Some are bitter, but they’re sworn in. And now the world knows and he feels dirty from it. He wanted his privacy, but there’s none in prison he gets reminded. One cost outweighs another.

The craving comes back as soon as he’s free. He leaves LA, running from his name. Life has turned to shit. He needs something to get away from the death of his two best friends. He needs to get away from the gnawing guilt that those people broke into his house for him and not for her. Guilt eats him alive. The only time he can sleep is if its drug induced, unable to spend more than ten minutes sober.

He blows through his money as he blows through the country, getting high whenever he can. By the time he reaches Nebraska he doesn’t have any money left, just the trust fund he can’t get his hands on. He doesn’t talk about his past and most of the druggies he meets are just as high as he is. He can deny his past and avoid the press. The only time he’ll acknowledge who he is when he needs money. The internet is a wonderful thing. There are always people who want a signed poster or some shit off of eBay. He can get some money here and there.

It’s a rainy day when he breaks into a church in a small town in Nebraska. He got kicked out of the car he was hitch hiking in. Who the fuck lets a guy out in the middle of fucking nowhere in the rain? He just wants to get out of the rain, he’s surprised he doesn’t get swallowed right into hell when he curls under the pews to sleep.

It’s a gentle shake and the promise of a cup of coffee that wakes him. His eyes are blood shot and he sniffles, wiping his nose on the back of his hand. He’ll take the coffee, but he doesn’t want anything else. “Naw man, fuck it. Why bother spending any god damn money on me? If I’m lucky I’ll be dead in a week.” He almost wishes he was dead. That’d be better than this.

The realization is that he has nowhere else to go. He can’t find a way out of this town, is too tired to crawl out of it himself, and can’t find anyone to get him high. So he grudgingly goes into the treatment center, part dragged and part carried.

His expectation is to stay in here forever, to never see grass again. He’s alright with that. Xavier wanted to avoid prison before, but maybe that’d be nice. There are no cameras in prisons or treatment centers and he has no desire to show himself to anything.

Toby’s home becomes his home. He’s still craving that buzz, settling it with sucking nicotine into his system. Cigarettes aren’t nearly as good as the mixture of drugs he had been pumping into himself, but it’s all he’s got so he’ll do it.

“I promise you, I’m going to give you your money yet if it’s the last thing I fucking do. Je promets” Toby needs his money, treatment centers are expensive and Xavier doesn’t have anything. He’s still waiting on his fucking god damn trust fund. He owes Toby more than the money for a treatment center. The Lestrange man, though he feels more like a boy, has no practical skills. He can’t keep his language in control to get through a job interview and flipping burgers isn’t something he wants to do. He’s good at acting, he wants to act. There’s no acting in Nebraska.

So instead he stays in Toby’s home, pouring over the comic books laid out on tables and ignoring the way the black haired man looks when he’s thinking. He’s determined not to fuck this up, even with a creeping feeling that Toby may go the same as Amelia. Film has no allure to him anymore, he can barely stand the animation type crap Toby watches. If it’s on a screen he doesn’t want it. It’s all fake, especially when he stumbles on youtube clips of news reports on his trail one night while buzzed on cheap beer and shitty vodka. How can he trust anything that gets edited? That people cut apart and sew back together again? It’s all fake. The miracle magic has turned into evil sorcery.

The first thing he does with the trust fund is give Toby the money he’s owed, with interest and consideration of all the food he’s eaten. He doesn’t want to touch it aside from that. He tells his father to do something with it so it’s out of his reach. Years have taught Xavier not to trust himself. That much money could buy a lot of drugs he still finds himself craving.

He doesn’t know how, but someone catches wind of his whereabouts. Nebraska is too far away for a lot of paparazzi and thank fucking god for that. But instead the job offers come in. Competitions for charity, which is fucking amusing because he needs the charity. Yeah, kids and cancer is a good cause, but he’s still sleeping on the couch of his best friend’s house so he doesn’t turn to drugs. Or there’s other shit he’s not interested in like made for TV movies and infomercials. He doesn’t want any of it and finds himself shouting curses on the end of the phone.

The envelope is big and heavy in his hands and he turns it over several times before he finally opens it. It’s a script, a long script. He’s about to toss it when Toby speaks up, it’s for Broadway. Thank fucking god for that nerd’s glasses. Still, he wants to throw it out. Broadway still requires him to move away and those bitchy publicity interviews that he hasn’t been on since before Amelia. He doesn’t want that. Maybe he does want to get back into acting, but he doesn’t want any of the side effects acting brings. Like all the shit he knows his return to the limelight will dig up.

But Toby is fucking persuasive. Xavier has the money to buy a decent house with his trust, a fucking nice house if he wanted. He can be like an adult or whatever type of bastard he's turned out to be. He can’t leave the man. More so, the man can’t leave him. Toby has seen him through everything and he worries. He worries what he’ll do to himself without Toby the babysitter. All he needs is to be alone for him to end up curled under some middle-of-nowhere church pew.

“Come with me.”

#xavier development #canon xavier #Xavier needs a babysitter in every universe #the first of many apps I may be posting #maybe

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idolizerp · 6 years

Photo

[ LOADING INFORMATION ON JAWBREAKER’S MAIN RAP ELLIE…. ]

DETAILS

CURRENT AGE: 23 DEBUT AGE: 19 SKILL POINTS: 01 VOCAL | 06 DANCE | 14 RAP | 09 PERFORMANCE

INTERVIEW

BIOGRAPHY

the always-confident ellie feels her confidence falter when their company goes under. for a brief moment, the group’s future is uncertain. her future is uncertain. until they’re told that they’re the one good thing to come out of singularity. kjh global creative is going to take them on with some minor changes. for the better, they say. she’s very skeptical of the company, of the new member, and even of their new name (jawbreaker is a dumb name, if you ask her). but she doesn’t have a choice. eleanor is ready to get back in the spotlight, no matter what it takes.

#id.bio #id.jawbreaker #id.kjh #id.son naeun

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idolizerp · 5 years

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LOADING INFORMATION ON JAWBREAKER’S MAIN RAP, VOCAL ELEANOR MOON…

IDOL DETAILS

STAGENAME: Ellie CURRENT AGE: 23 DEBUT AGE: 20 TRAINEE SINCE AGE: 17 COMPANY: KJH ETC: this member is a rap soloist

IDOL IMAGE

the marketing team at kjh have an idea in mind when they hear about the new foreign trainee. silly american, still getting accustomed to the language and the culture; it was a stereotype they assumed she’d slide into easily. when word of this reaches her ears, it’s obvious to her that they haven’t done their research. that’s not who she is; she’s not even sure she could pretend to be that. they have yet to speak to her about it, and it doesn’t look like she’s debuting soon, so she does everything in her power to change their mind. she knows she has to be respectful of her new company. her father’s words ring sound in her mind: “don’t speak back to anyone like you spoke to your teachers here; you’ll be sent back home without a second thought”. more than anything she wants to succeed and debut. but she decides she needs to be bolder. she speaks to her superiors with a surprising confidence. in any class or lesson, she’s always at the front, eager to learn and even more eager to impress. eleanor knows she’s more than a stereotype; she just has to show them.

eleanor thinks higher of herself than most of the world does, though she doesn’t always let it show. she’s been quoted claiming that she’s the self-proclaimed visual of jawbreaker, and the true reason for their success. no one is ever entirely sure if she’s joking or not, or if this is all an act. she doesn’t want them to know the answer. it rubs some the wrong way, and others think it’s cute and naive. when asked who she’d want to trade places with for a day, she said ‘no one’ because she can’t imagine being anyone better than who she already is. her favorite part of any comeback is her rap (“it basically defines the whole song”, she claims). a meeting with her management and a very firm slap on the wrists follows.

this gains her backlash. it’s been there since day one, but this really stirs it up. why does she get to be the main rapper? what makes her special? the other members are more talented than she is, she reads. they have far more experience, and she can’t deny that. one of them was raised by a rapper/producer. three years feels like an eternity to eleanor, but there are trainees that have been working for over six years and still haven’t managed to debut. what does she have that they lack? while she wants to scream back that she has talent, passion, and drive, she keeps her mouth closed because it’s what she’s supposed to do. when asked to comment on her criticism, she just smiles and promises fans that she’s working her hardest to be the best she can for them. when has she become this person?

IDOL HISTORY

it’s one of these friends that tells her about the audition. the boy and his sister are older than her, but two of the only korean friends she has. they were the ones to introduce her to kpop and khiphop to begin with. some of it is ridiculous, some of it flows better than american hiphop, but it all piques her curiosity. she has no idea what groups are under this label, kjh, or anything about it, other than it’s kpop. somewhere deep inside, this audition is her only chance at freedom. life at home with parents who don’t understand is a prison. she should be applying to college, focusing on that, but there’s no draw for eleanor. out in the industry, she’ll be able to do what she loves. maybe it’s not originally how she imagine herself, but it’s a step in the right direction, the only direction that makes sense to her right now. she signs up for the audition and prepares a song in english for them, and one in korean.

trainee life isn’t at all what eleanor expected. she didn’t know it was going to be so… strict. she thought she had left this life behind in california. she also didn’t expect to have so much competition. the whining is short-lived (much to the gratitude of the other trainees). she knows what she needs to do to get to where she needs to be. so she trains day in and day out. she barely eats. she’s at the gym constantly. every tidbit of advice they give her she gobbles up, eager to improve. she’s ruthless and some of the other trainees are rubbed the wrong way. she doesn’t care. she doesn’t care about anyone other than herself and it shows. others aren’t the biggest fan of her personality, though in front of her superiors, she puts on a kinder face. her temper again gets the better of her and she yells at a younger girl for accidentally tripping her. while she knows deep down her reaction was uncalled for, her pride keeps her from giving a sincere apology until she spots the girl crying one day. she offers the girl a hidden candy bar and mumbles a nearly incomprehensible but sincere “sorry”.

it’s another year before eleanor debuts, with a nickname not foreign to her. her dancing and rapping has improved, she’s proven to be a talented and passionate trainee, so ellie is debuting as the main rapper of the new girl group, jawbreaker. when she’s finally in private, she bursts out in tears. all her hard work was finally paying off. it was her first real glimpse at any kind of freedom. she loves the concept, loves her role. feels… okay about the other girls. she’s never been great at sharing the spotlight, but at least she feels important here. and over time she warms up to the other members.

they’ve only been around for two years when kjh gives her a chance to prove herself. another member has a solo, something dahyun has always been bitter of. she’s the focal point in the group, shouldn’t she be the one debuting solo? it’s what she’s always wanted, something she craves with every part of her being. why does someone else get it? but then she’s given her shot. she’s surprised at how… competent the song they offer her is. it’s actually good, she actually gets to rap. it’s better than she hoped, and maybe now people will take her more seriously.

it’s not the most popular song, but at least it’s her. and now she strives not only to bring jawbreaker into the spotlight, but to be given more opportunities to be authentically herself.

#id.bio #id.kjh #id.jawbreaker #id.son naeun

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