#anon i beg you to leave me alone and get a better hobby

[chaosandthe-deadblog]

hi i’m that one person who was upset about a sonadow sex joke you made. let me preface by saying i’m not here to argue or scare you but to apologize.

you don’t have to respond to this at ALL i just saw your blog name and felt guilty for hurting you.

im sorry about upsetting you and reacting the way i did. i still think its eugh and everything. but i just get upset when people make jokes about that with characters previously stated to be minors because of personal trauma and people sexualizing me as a kid and just morals in general. of course i know that i can’t control how people enjoy their stuff, and i know it’s going to exist regardless. but i want to at least know if who im interacting with is someone i don’t want to talk to due to being a proshipper or whatever stuff like that.

i wasn’t trying to ‘cancel’ you or anything. i was upset and said something in the moment. i’m sorry. i should have just unfollowed and moved on. i should’ve saw the human i knew behind the screen but what i could only think of was a random person i didn’t know. i’m really sorry.

well, anon, i accept your apology. but also i dont. so let's take this one by one, okay?

first of all. you're still wrong, and i'm still angry.

it wasnt a "sex joke", i was commenting on a uquiz someone else made, because i found the sheer fact that sonadow of all ships was included in that quiz to be really funny. not to mention, the uquiz was based on statistics from ao3, and i guessed the correct answer by just knowing how shipping culture works. i thought this was funny. you know, people are allowed to find suggestive humor funny, even if you're uncomfortable with it, anon.

but i'll humor you. lets say i was doing the things i got accused of doing. big deal. i don't think you're wrong for being upset, much less for being uncomfortable, but one: could've settled this over dms, two: not everyone is you. not everyone is uncomfortable. not everyone cares so much. i didn't give that joke more than two seconds of thought, you clearly did, and i don't think you're wrong for that, i think it wasn't my problem.

secondly, and this will sound horrible, but (like i said) your discomfort isn't something i (the people running that oc poll, and my followers, by the way) needed to know about. i hear you, anon, and i'm sorry that all that happened to you. i understand the discomfort. but, like i said, we could've settled this in private, you could've at least told me which mutual you were, and no one else had to know.

third: i am not a proshipper, and i don't appreciate that you're still calling me gross, by the way. this isn't an apology if you're not accepting you were wrong. i'll humor you again and say that i was doing what you say i was doing: it is not that serious to me, and i don't like being called gross for something that is just plain, morally neutral weird (not good, not bad, neutral weird)

and fourth: thank you for at least recognizing what you should've done. however you didn't do that. from what i understand, based on what happened shortly after your anon, you went to the person running that sonic oc poll (which, whatever, i was losing anyway), and you lied about what i was doing to get me kicked out. good on you for realizing that was wrong. but you know, i'm still angry. im banned from many fandom events now because you couldn't just unfollow me. so i'm glad you realized it was wrong, i accept your apology, but i'm still very much angry with you.

i'm glad you're sorry, i'm glad you're recognizing i'm a human being (okay?) and i'm glad you at least tried to apologize. don't call me gross, apologize for real, and next time don't do this to someone through tumblr anon over whats essentially a common ocurrence on the sonic fandom, and every other fandom

(by the way, even if we weren't mutuals, you shouldnt do something like this to "a random person you don't know" either, but what do i know right? and "because of my trauma" isn't an excuse, because by that logic you also generated trauma in me, because now i'm fucking paranoid about everything i fucking post. i can thank you for that.)

have a nice day.

by the way

[chosoisamalewife]

Loved the Sukuna post. Now... Hear me out...

Bottom Sukuna..

male reader..

some nsfw and sfw hcs

Bottom!Sukuna x Male reader

A/N : ANON I LOVE YOUR BRAIN (the sfw is just more domestic headcanons, I love making big scary mean men domesticated 😁😁😏😏)

A/N : I might have been listening to flesh by Simon Curtis while cooking up the nsfw part

WARNINGS : OOC!Sukuna / Power bottom!Sukuna / Top!reader / a lot of kinky shit / mentions slapping / choking / knife knife / blood play

This man will not show an ounce of submission in public

However remember when I said he loves for you to trace the marks on him. When he is super relaxed a slight pur can be heard. (I HEAD CANON THAT HE PURRS JUST HEAR ME OUT PLEASE. I BEGGING YOU)

However it's not loud and can only be heard when he speaks but you can feel it. Low rumbles in his chest

If you have any hobbies he would act so uninterested but he is full of shit

He would slyly ask about them and take note of them

Only trusts uraume alone with you

Finds everything you watch fucking stupid and boring. He would literally groan anytime you put something on. Would he sit down and watch with you…….yes but will he complain for a bit…..of course he would

Like I said previously he is a pretty good cook but if you are even better than him he would just watch you cook. There is something captivating about you being focused and concentrated. (He will probably get in the mood for some fun 😏)

NSFW

For him to even consider you topping him would take alot of convincing. "You topping me? Do you view me as some type of weakling" He would laugh loudly in your face

Before you get to chance to top him you have to prove to him that you can take him. That you can handle him.

So that means an all night session with him. He will ruin you all night and if you pass then you will get the glorious victory.

Let's just say he was shocked when you succeeded. He tried everything to make you tap out but nothing seem to work.

POWER!BOTTOM

He wants you to FUCK him.

He wants you to treat him like he does you, well at least try to

"Don't go gently with me now. I'm not weak , I can fucking take it"

When you finally gripped his hips and started to pound into him he would let out a manic laugh. It startled you a little bit but you carried on

"There you go fuck me like a strong man"

When he tops you he mostly groans but when you fuck him for the first time he literally growls and grits his teeth

He can not let your hear how good you are making him feel

But you will feel it

Ooooooh lord God help you because he will leave SCRATCHES on your back, anywhere

He will dig his nails into any part of your skin so please have antibiotic ointment on hand. Love watching the blood trickle from were his nails have been. Will lick your blood

DO NOT TEASE HIM OR TIE HIM UP because if you do that just means hell when he tops you again

When I say treat him like he does you, slap him, fuck his throat, overestimate him, choke him, bite him. Everything be ROUGH

AND I MEAN CHOKE HIM, this psychotic mother fucker would smile while his lungs aren’t getting air

Slap his face, thighs, ass everything. He lives for the stings

The only time he would beg you while bottoming is for you to sit on his face or to cum in his throat

Put a knife to his throat as you pound into him, he would think you are the sexiest thing to ever walk the earth

Maybe even cut him a little bit , collect his blood on your fingers and shove them in his mouth 😏😏

CAN LAST ALL NIGHT, you will probably run out of energy before does so could luck

I want to give him the most coma inducing diabolical earth shaking galaxy destroying supernova creating backshots. 🤸‍♂️🤸‍♂️

[howlsofbloodhounds]

nckdnsk howl you can't keep having these bombass headcanons while i'm still compiling stuff to write my fics (it's me, crowshipping anon) 😭 i'll probably share them when i'm done 🫣

jokes aside, since you want some two cents on killer and color being apart from each other...

cross takes the role of teaching killer about boundaries in relationships. he belatedly realizes that "wait, does killer have any hobbies or other friends apart from color?". and so it turns into a daily exercise of forcing killer (usually with violence sadly) to socialize with more people and find his own hobbies/activities not related to color. cross gets killer a secluded place to live (cross might have blackmailed ink into helping). cross makes killer decide on interior furniture, letting him have some choices in his living environment. baby steps, baby steps.

unlike color, of course cross is busy with his own stuff and responsibilities. i imagine he's on community service for what he did in the past. so cross is not just killer's only caretaker/parole officer. sometimes dream is there, sometimes blue, sometimes murder and/or horror (if they escape nightmare and once they're well-adjusted - i imagine they'd have an easier time than killer for... reasons), and there are other people as well. it's not a one-person task to rehabilitate a bad person - it's a community effort to reform them to be better!

(though i imagine for safety reasons, people usually take on shifts in groups. killer is still dangerous after all. i think murder, having previous beef with killer, will enjoy having legitimate reasons to fight killer and taunt him over his failures of controlling color and how he's not that dissimilar to nightmare. needs some tough love to get through killer's thick skull after all.)

after a while, cross thinks about getting killer some cats, though he is skeptical at first. it's not that he can't trust killer to take care of cats - he's just wary the caretaking duties and ownership might trigger killer's control issues again. so at first it's cat therapy sessions with ccino. killer has some alone times with the cats. maybe once ccino can reassure cross that killer can be a responsible cat owner, then it's time to GET KILLER SOME CATS!!! killer can adopt some hobbies, like crocheting so he can give his cats some fun accessories, or journaling so he can vent like crazy. oh yeah, and he needs a therapist too.

meanwhile, color is on his multiversal road trip with delta and epic. he feels excited and apprehensive at the same time. excited, because it's been a long time since he has time to spend with his old friends - he misses this so much. and apprehensive, because he can't help fretting over whether killer is okay or not - last time he saw killer, cross was dragging him away quite aggressively. epic is like "nah bro, cross won't kill him, don't worry. let's just relax"

so color is relearning how to be himself around people he love. sometimes color hurts delta/epic out of habit for not listening to him, and he's appalled by his actions. sometimes he begs them to let him see killer again, just a call, and epic and delta just have to flat out deny it for his own recovery. he can only hear updates through cross. sometimes he tries to sneak out to return to killer (yay portal powers!), but gets caught and coaxed into not doing anything reckless.

this is me assuming everything go swimmingly for both of them, though for killer it'll be much harder. imagine something goes wrong. like killer finally weasels one of his caretakers into bringing him to color, or color successfully sneaks out to see killer. imagine killer says to color that everyone is out to get them, to separate them. let's just leave everything and run away together. killer knows just a universe that nightmare has destroyed where no one can suspect. imagine color is reluctant at first, but then killer pulls out his guilt-tripping card again. he was miserable the whole time color wasn't there, so is color okay with leaving him? killer knows color knows killer is a terrible person, and yet color still tries to connect with him, not to fix him but to show him a better way to live. and isn't killer content with being with color, just the two of them against the world? whatever color decides to do, killer will agree. but, as killer proposes, if they stay, killer will not be happy, and will color live with that?

Grr yess thank you I Am eating this up more please 🙏 🙏 (crowshipping anon may I please be able to read your fics when you’re done with them???)

I am conflicted because I am like yes killer get worse you fucking vile creature and in the next I want to snap his fucking neck. I wonder if ink shares my emotions on this (characters in a story after all)

I can’t imagine what killers fucking journal would be like. probably alternating between literally everything about color and then just violently wanting to rip cross and dream and fucking dust to shreds because how dare they

it is probably the equivalent of that one post that goes “*writing in my journal with a glitter pen* I am losing touch with my humanity”

I know his bitch ass immediately zeroed in on his past victims—blue, murder, horror—and started tearing into them. probably knew cross would prevent him from physically doing so hes gonna do it verbally. hows fucking papyrus doing huh? hows that eye treating you baby blue? trick your brother into eating anymore meat horror? does he hate you now?

his ass would immediately use his knowledge and experience with/about nightmare to fuck with dream too. you can’t even save your own brother what makes you think you could save me?

he would most definitely attempt to sabotage cross’, murder’s, and horror’s “redemption arcs.”

theyre all gonna fucking hate him in these moments and its gonna take a whole lotta patience and understanding to not immediately murder him. (maybe thats what a part of him is hoping for) (looking at you stage 1, even tho you havent likely made a appearance yet)

his ass would definitely fake cry and pretend to be getting better only to just clock whoever is watching him out and attempt to escape (goes nowhere because he wasnt even allowed to know where color is)

but imagine the relief for a moment if color did sneak out to see him. before his guilt tripping bullshit.

like. like. cause I know his codependent ass was on the edge on a perpetual breakdown even when he tried to hide it and suppress it under his apathy and dissociate. his experienced mind is conjuring up images every horrible fucking thing that could happening to color, and stage 1’s anxiety is causing fucking constant nightmares and flashbacks and it makes it worse because I know he tries very often and frequently to shove stage 1 all the way down. (Nightmares still out there he hates color colors not safe)

no. no. he would just ruin everything, hed try to kill them—he wouldnt understand what killer is doing. killer cant die, color still needs him. stage 1 would be stupid enough to buy into cross’ bullshit.

i can just imagine the relief that almost sends him to his knees when he finally sees color. eyes looking him over everywhere—wheres the scars? wheres the bruises?—shaky hands (uncharacteristic) roaming over colors form. maybe even does something as dramatic as slams color against a wall with his body just for the drama of it all.

He’s real. He’s real he’s real—solid underneath his hands. Colors real. maybe so relieved there’s even some cheek nuzzles and maybe even some kisses from colors cheek to his throat.

and. and. and killer failed him. he failed. he failed to protect him.

he needs to be punished. he knows. color probably doesnt know but its okay he’ll teach him later.

and then there’s comes the exhausted but content full body sigh before killer melts against color and then here comes the apologies. for failing.

theres some reassurance from color—no don’t apologize its not your fault im okay epic and delta would never hurt me/let me be hurt—then it loops around to the fucking guilt tripping. killer im gonna snap your neck you prick.

oh boy imagine being killers therapist during this. hes gonna make your job miserable and like pulling teeth. hes gonna observe you and start using what hes noticed against you—the kids dont call anymore therapist person? oh your husband is dead..im sure its your fault.

and i can imagine back with delta and epic and color that if anyone tries to talk about killer he immediately starts defending him. like no it wasnt okay what killer did but come on he doesnt know any better (color knows logically that its killers responsibility to learn better anyhow)

id imagine that the experience with killer and the subsequent effects of instinctively hurting delta and/or epic mustve led color to those “hurting my loved ones” nightmares that delta is quite familiar with. and delta hates killer for this. he hates that he made color afraid of himself, that he did all that to someone he claims to care about more than anything.

“care about” his ass. this isnt love. this isnt what you do to those you love.

anyway i need color and epic and delta to cuddle up all nice warm and theyre there to comfort color when he wakes up screaming/crying. often times color just wants killer (the devotion when he looks at color is as comforting as it is terrifying), so at most epic and delta settle for something that could remind him of killer. a photo? killers jacket?

delta should get to punch killer in the mouth for this yes siree. epic gives him the immediate “yes” to the signaled question. (murder gets to beef with killer and also talks shit about killer out loud to papyrus & although killer doesn’t know it reaper and grimm know all the juicy details (murder talks shit while at their altars lmao) and are judging him harshly) (theyre like ‘damn bitch you live like this???’)

[rumblelibrary]

Now that you are writing requests, I think it's only fair I send you a few after some of the ones you have sent me 😌 as you've said you were the original anon who requested Laszlo x Sapiosexual partner headcanons from me, I'm curious to see how you would write it. Take it in any direction you want to 😘

Thinking Alike [Dr Laszlo Kreizler x Reader]

Word count: 3k

Warnings: Mention of physical violence, mild stalking, smut (yup, there it is!)

Author’s note: My first smut, something easy breezy to begin with. Laszlo is an awkward mess and I love him.

It was embarrassing for Laszlo at first, to admit a weakness, so bluntly. Such a vile thing to do for a man like him.He tried reasoning through it more and more, lonely men went often to prostitutes, John himself did and with the extraordinary result not be devoured by syphilis or other diseases.He didn’t hurt himself nor others in the process.

The first time he met you it was by accident, he was invited by one of his former patients to visit her at her university, nothing unusual, he remembered her well: Julia, shy, small, bent down and backwards by a family that abused her very being, that abused her mind, development and growth.But to see her now a young woman, studying literature at university, thriving in her life and taking her own choices, she even started an internship with Sara, that was something that made a man like Laszlo proud of his job.

Briefly: that day was a success for him: from the meeting to the lunch they shared, she showed in every given moment how she treasured everything she learned at the Institute and, even though hard times were not over, she felt like she was able to face them.Then Julia asked him to join her to listen to a lecture, assuring he would love it so he obliged as it wouldn’t be too bad to feel like a student again and maybe spark some new interest in him.So he did, he sat down and leaned his back on the seat, the soft scent of the woody desks and chairs taking over his nostrils. He remembered how he was at that age, hungry, unnecessary aggressive and lonely. He smiled to himself at the memory.Poor John, still there to look after him and trying to give him a minimum of social skills.

Then the room fell into silence as you walked inside, your choice of clothing a white shirt and a burgundy skirt, a pocket watch on your side. A simple style, you wish good morning to the class and don’t indulge too much into talk.And there is where the unexpected happened.You open up simply, a picture, a quote. The description of man as William Blake: poet, engraver, prophet.To transcribe your words would be similar to the conflict of any man that ever found himself in the duty of writing, or better, transcribing a sacred text.The way you spoke, the way you held everybody’s attention, the way you moved back and forth or wrote on the chalkboard. The passion surging by your words digging into his flesh and bones, every cell into his body surging into an agonising desire to hear more. The way your words balanced, how you managed to go from interesting facts to more detailed ones, from hard critical informations to conceptual ideas.That was the beginning of something new, his brain wasn’t able to move past the thought of you. Literature wasn’t his field, but he felt like you were the spring of all truths. So it begun. He brought the books, he came to the lessons. He thrived in every stolen moment he got with you, he sulked when somebody caught your attention, even more if it was to make some silly comment or question, he adored the way  your hands traced shapes into the air symmetrically, it triggered him to wonder if you ever studied dancing, the pose of your fingers always so balanced. He learned every micro habit you had: the way you always looked at your pocket watch when it was almost half time throughout the lesson, how you changed pin in your hair every day, the way you tucked your reading glasses in your shirt only to then look for those when in need to read. His favourite moments were the ones when everybody was leaving the class and he could see you relax on the chair, gift little smiles around as you collected our belongings. Your presence was by now his safe place, those two hours he spent a the university were the only moments he felt free, even if unseen.

Until the day he was getting into the class to find it empty and you alone there.“Regular students got a card saying the lesson today was cancelled” you said and his heart sunk into his chest “I would be mad to have someone sneaking in my classroom, but I had the feeling to have seen you before”

He gulped down as you were so close by now, he could guess your favourite perfume.You handed him a book, his book with his picture inside followed by his name in cursive letters.

“What does an alienist says about my course?”

“I say, your dialectic is what many of my patients would need in order to survive”You were surprised, eyebrows raising and a slight tilt of the head, you expected to find him guilty and ashamed, surely he was, but that answer was bold.

“And you? Do you find solace in my dialectics?” He took a moment before staring up at you, you didn’t realised how tall he was by seeing him always sat in the back, but you noticed him at every lesson. How couldn’t you?An handsome, elegant grown man hiding among those twenty something, the walking stick giving away always his calculated late entrance in class, his eyes always on you digging holes.

“Constantly”His answer surprised you, you expected to confront him and send him away and now you’re torn between the feeling of cradling him in your arms and, what? “I could forgive you for a lunch” He smiles, his eyes shining “I know the perfect place”

That lunch became one of many lunches.Every time you had lesson he would wait for you and you’d share a meal.To open up to him felt almost too easy, but he was an alienist, that was his job. He also opened up with you, you shared books, and interests and long chats. He wrote you cards and you wrote back to him, he sent you his articles and you sent him yours. He asked for books to introduce children to literature and you visited the Institute helping him in the task in exchange of some entry level books about psychology. Lunches became dinners, long walks became longer, soft smiles became him offering you his arm to walk together. You were starting to develop some tenderness for him, you always wondered what he was thinking and what he would opinion over this or that, you craved to confront your opinions and Laszlo wasn’t feeling any less drawn to it.It was beginning to become difficult when you started to visit him in his dreams, he would dream of you in ways he didn’t dare to speak up about. Only the way you talked when you grew passionate about something gave him a sense of tension, a deep desire going through him as he touched his thigh with his sweaty palm to ground himself. You felt like he was growing distant, unaware of how he was growing somehow closer. Closer to the point he couldn’t resist you anymore, hide behind simple touches of courtesy, to feel your hand only when gloved, stare at every little stand of hair move unruly on your neck while you spoke so highly of any topic. It was unexpected the time, while sharing some impressions on a recent article, he put his  hand flat over the page and leaned in capturing your lips in a sudden but awaited kiss. You kissed him back realising how such a simple gesture meant so much to you. Your hand followed up resting on top of his still hiding the page from you. His lips soft, his beard tickling you lightly as your eyes shone.When he pulled back, only because in need to breathe not else, he looked at you but you smiled at him brushing your nose lightly against his making him break into a smile.  The happiest smile.

“Do you even realise how foolish is that?”

“Are you calling me a fool?” He growled at you. Yes, he followed a potential murderer across the city, got himself beat up, but he was alive and now he got more informations.

“I dare to say I am, loud and clear Laszlo”He frowned deeply, you calling him a fool?

“Take it back”

“No” “I said” he grunted as he breathed heavily through his nostrils  “Take it back” You never saw him this mad but you didn’t oblige his request, he made you sick worry and hid all this madness of crime cases from you through all this time, not even once he mentioned this …what? A hobby? Desire for adrenaline? “A man that doesn’t stand up to his own truths is a fool to me” you said coldly “all this time spent to talk about nonsense and you’re working on solving crimes? Who is the man that I know then? Does he exists only when Dr Kreizler is without a case? There’s even a real interest in what you ever said to me? Or you just needed a distraction?”

“Don’t you dare to contradict me, I am no liar”You smirked, by now he was close, almost threatening even if you know well he wouldn’t ever hurt you. “Then what are you?” He froze, his eyebrows furrowed, what should he tell you? That he loved the way your brain worked? That every time you bounced ideas back and forth he felt aroused? That you provoked in him a thirst for more, more knowledge, more passion, more life. You let out a breathy chuckle as he didn’t answer now, you were sad and disappointed. You indeed believed you had found your match and not another double faced man.You picked your coat and left his office even if your heart was shattering on the inside and begging you not to leave like that.You spent two weeks apart, two weeks in which his spot in the classroom was empty, both of you ate alone, walked alone, lived alone. An emptiness that was so heavy it felt like the sky would break under the weight of it. But he couldn’t think of you, the case was on, the victims were falling one after the other, and yet he couldn’t think clearly. Before just thinking of how you’d think helped him, but what about now? He couldn’t reach for you. You were right, he hid part of himself to you and he couldn’t ask you to risk your life or spend nights and days exploring the dark sides of human nature, even though your sensibilities and introspection would have made you the most valuable asset in any research. He locked himself in his office getting high on tea and pacing the room back and forth talking out loud trying to gain back the process you two formed together, the chemistry, the balance of thoughts. Until your voice reached to him. “What if it is not anger the motif?”You leaned against the doorframe staring at him, you gave up your anger.  You were there for him. He stared at you like he wondered if you’re even real. “How did you come in?” “I said I was from Miss Howard” “So you can also lie” You chuckled “Only for a good purpose” You moved inside closing the door behind you as you took off your coat and hat, you moved closer to him offering him your hand, palm up.He stared at your eyes, there wasn’t much to add.He put the eraser in your hand as you cancelled the chalkboard from all his previous work. What happened next was pure magic, clarity spreading through the space, every fact double checked by the two of  you as now the facts spread in order, clear, in a linear way, nothing was left to causality.You two closing each other’s sentences, you handing him books and him handing others back to you, papers, scattered pencils.Even you wearing his glasses by accident and handing those back as you reached for your own.It was a frenzy, a dance, a song. “So if this is a scheme…” you begin “…the killer will strike again on Friday” he concludes. You stare at him, a big smile creeps over your lips wide, you can save a life, it is only Monday now.He leans in holding onto your hadn’t with his left hand, but you’re just mimicking him as your lips collide. “How can you be like this? How can you be so perfect?” He groans against your lips not able to part from yours but to praise you. “We are” you correct him “we are perfect, together” he nodded slowly as you were completely right. He let you pull him on the sofa where he slept so many nights when he was too tired to go back home, a very cold and empty home. He took his time, he stood in front of you undoing those clothes he so carefully studied during your lessons almost to the point to know each item of your wardrobe. As you undressed him you realised how you never minded his arm or to help him undo his shirt, you found it poetic, you always found beauty in him, you saw it like a punishment due to something more special given to him.The poet Homer had to be blind in order to sing the war of Troy, Laszlo had to lose an arm to be able to see through others. So there you were, completely deprived of your clothing as he still conserved his bottom half, staring at each other’s eyes before he leaned his forehead against yours, shifting angle then to meet your lips with his. “Don’t, I waited enough” you whispered to him as his left hand between your legs to caress your folds with his fingers triggering a shiver down your spine. “I am the doctor here” he murmured as his fingers moved so smoothly over your slit gathering some wetness and spreading it together before pushing a finger inside you.

“I also am” you whispered back, voice shaking, even if a doctorate in literature doesn’t give you much of a position in this moment while standing helpless with him fingering you so nicely. “I know, it makes you even more beautiful” he assures to you digging his head in the crook of your neck nipping and sucking over your skin slowly adding another finger.You whined not able to move away from his fingers teasing your insides, and yet not what you were looking for. You pared your lips in a silent moan as he shook your hips making you grind slowly following his touch “I don’t want to play Laszlo” you begged “we have all the time to fool around, I missed you too much” “You can’t always use your words to boss me around like this” He smirked as he pulled his fingers slowly out of you, too slowly for your taste, he did it like you had all the time in this word, his fingers brushing over you inside, slowly slipping out covered in your wetness only to trace your clit with their tips.

He pulled back sitting down on the couch like a king on his throne, parted legs and back slightly slouched, while staring at your naked form in front of him moving his left hand to undo his pants as you approached. “You’re a vision”His whisper slowly pulling you in when you straddled him once his erection sprung free slowly guiding him to brush against your entrance. You looked up at him gulping softly before lowering yourself onto him. You stared at him as his eyes fluttered closer and you shook your hips a little trying to reach for the most comfortable position, he was thick stretching you deliciously and that little hint of pain only making it feel more complete, more needed, meant to be. A moan leaving your lips as you gasped for air, his weak right hand moving to rest on your thigh.You observed him as the desire was clouding your usual reasonable and efficient brain, his left hand grasping your hips when you begun moving on top of him. The pace erratic at first before the instinct kicked in, no more witty remarks needed here, you couldn’t make up your mind now.He groaned, his soft gasps and growls being the best sounds along with your moans, two reasonable intellectuals now lost into the simplest and most natural of the acts.Your hips yanked and lost control for a moment as his hand moved to touch your clit “So sensitive” he cooed, you were a mess of feelings, his head bowing down over your chest grasping your nipple between his lips. He teased and sucked, making all his fantasies real, finally touching and feeling you, your shivers due to him, your pleasure and pain completely in his hands.You gasped as he sucked too hard, he seemed to know you more than he knew himself and maybe it was true. He spent so much time watching you, studying you, indulging in every little reaction you had. His eyes dropped down between your joined bodies, he was mesmerised by the shapes your hips were tracing, just enjoying the view of himself sinking inside you filling you up completely, your wetness so evident making the whole process terrifically easy.

“You’re close” he sentenced “you’re so close” If you weren’t close you’d be after he said you were, like he decided it.His left hand leaving your clit as he wrapped his arm around your waist pulling you down over him. Now it was up to him as your mobility was restricted, he begun moving his hips up holding you down, he kept going so hard slamming inside you as he held you still with just that arm, the pleasure that his ruthless moves caused to you doing the rest. You couldn’t hold back any more, your moans getting lost into throaty sounds as your orgasm washed over you. 

But he wasn’t done, he kept going as you rode down your orgasm until he tugged you down one last time filling your body, a little yelp of pleasure leaving your lips as you got so full of him and your eyes fluttered lightly because of such a raw basic feeling, that fullness that was proper of a basic instinct you felt rooted into you. If you were reasonable and aware you’d be worrying about things like consequences and having to talk about the future. But you weren’t any close to it.You rested against him gathering air back in your lungs as he moved his hand on your lower back  slowly moving it up and down, his right hand’s thumb brushing over that same thigh in the smaller and sweetest gesture of attention. You shifted slightly after few moments to look at him slowly touching over his cheek with your fingertips. “Truth for the wise, beauty for the heart” He said, paraphrasing Friedrich Von Schiller, an author you used a lot in your lectures. “Truth for the wise, beauty for the heart” you repeated. That little motto became your code, the way you reminded each other the duality you were blessed with: your bright minds and your unfiltered passion. And you’d use it from time to time. You’d write it to each other’s notes. It was your “I love you” before the love word was even pronounced.

Tagged @cazzyimagines @lieutenantn @handmaiden-of-mischief @thesunflowersutra Let me know if you want to get added <3

[neosimi]

Personal Mod List

I was asked by anon if I could post my personal mod list too and well, apart from my must haves these are the mods I currently have in my downloads folder. I am always searching for new mods to test and hopefully incorporate into my gameplay, yes looking @ you Story Progression! So of course, this list is ever changing. Credits to all mod creators listed below! ♡

Anywho, thanks for requesting this anon! /ᐠ ̥  ̮  ̥ ᐟ\ฅ

Note: Asterisks (*) before the name means the mod has also been added to my must haves list. You can check it out here.

Autonomy Control -- Restrain the townies who oft drop by. Inhibit the playables with homes of their own. Bridle the Students who refuse to die. The Choice of Autonomy is now yours alone.

*Soft Shadows --  Turns the blobby outdoor shadows into soft ones, like in the family portrait and indoors. Great for screenshots.

No Kicking Trash -- For the life of me, I couldn't find the exact mod I have but I found Squinge's mod as an alternative.

Torment Enabled -- Allows children to torment anyone. 

Toddlers Eat Flowers -- All toddlers can increase their hunger level through eating flowers, not just plantsims.

Reservable Crib -- Allows you to reserve a crib for an individual baby or toddler. 

Realistic Sized Muffin -- Fixes the size of the muffin from the toy oven.

Baby Gate -- Fully functional baby gate based on the Kinder Keep Away baby gate from TS3 Store World, Aurora Skies.

Play Group Service -- When you use the phone service a Playgroup van is dispatched immediately, if your toddlers are already at playgroup then it will return them, otherwise it'll come and pick them up.

Kids Camp -- Send children and teens to camp for the weekend. The phone call is only available Friday afternoons (until 10:00pm) and Saturday mornings (from 8:00am) arriving home Sunday (at 5:00pm). Fee is $40.00 per child.

Relationship Panel Remover --  Allows you to remove unwanted sims from the relationship panel screen.

Senior Center -- Elder sims can leave the lot for awhile to the Senior Center. Gain fun and social motives, a chance chard of learning a new skill, crafting a hobby item, or meeting another elder sim.

Ask about Family -- A simple 'Ask.../About Family' sim menu plugin.

Kids Pick Flowers for Mom - self-explanatory. so cuteee!

Orphan Display Cot -- I like to use this in my adoption center lots so I can go and adopt a random baby if i'd like to.

Strays Always Accept Adoption -- self-explanatory bc why wouldn't they want a home :(

Nap More Energy -- Sims get a little more energy from napping.

Fun Gain on Phone -- Sims have more fun on the phone.

No Autonomous Swing Child -- Curbs autonomous behavior of adult sims swings children around. I find this annoying in my gameplay along with playing the piano and the read to interaction. 

Cops Can Fight Burglars -- Allows sims in the cop career track OR who used to be a cop NPC to fight burglars and regain your stuff.

There Can Be Only One Professor -- Game will generate one rather than two professors for each major. Gender will be random.

Copy of Diploma -- Give your sims a copy of their diploma if they lost it or need to hand one out after upgrading them with the bat box.

Hide Mascot Clothes -- Hides fugly mascot clothes from CAS menu.

*Deadly Werewolves -- Werewolves can maim and ravage sims with the chance of killing them.

*Vampires Can Drink Blood and Turn Sims into Ghouls -- self-explanatory. 

Beg for Money -- Sims are able to panhandle whenever.

*Hidden Interactions -- This is a set of three global mods that unlock hidden interactions that are normally only performed autonomously. Also a part two!

No Life Skills -- Disables wants for learning life skills like lifelong happiness, fire prevention, couple's counseling, etc.

*Simnopke's Sliders -- 24 face sliders available in CAS, plastic surgery machine, and Bodyshop.

*Better Butler Meals -- Butlers will stop slacking off by cooking crap like ramen and TV dinners.

*No Whining at Missing Objects -- self-explanatory lol.

Low Food Warning -- notifies you when stock in fridge is low.

Polygamous Marriage -- The base game wedding arch now has the option for a marriage of convenience/polygamous marriage. The social from Marhis’ arch has been modified and included as well to work with maxis arches by midgethetree. Pretty sure i have ask to leave partner from here too.

*Chat in Pool - Sims can now chat while swimming!

*No Bathroom Dishes -- Dishes will not be washed in the bathroom. Affects all sinks by placement, not by type of sink. Truly, it is More Awesome Than You.

*Lockable Garage Doors -- Allows garage doors to be locked like other doors.

Outdoor Lights -- Outdoor lights will stay on until 7 am rather than 2 am.

Baby Control --  Adds the "Make Selectable" option for babies. I like to use it to cheat the babies needs if I had to.

Doorbell Quieter -- the doorbell is more quiet lol.

*Front Door Hack -- Sims won't go to your garage door or back door to ring the doorbell.

[classic80sand90smovieloves2]

Meeting and Dating Benny O’Donnell

(My gif)(Requested by @famousalmondprofessordeputy and anon)

- You’d been friends with Pink, Cynthia, Tony and Mike ever since freshman year. You’d also had a crush on Benny O’Donnell for just as long but since the two of you weren’t in the same clique you’d never spoken to him before, even if you were both close to Pink.

- Well along came poker night, Pink had football practice after school and you had to make up a test so the both of you decided to drive together once you were finished. The test was easy so you had some time to kill before Pink was ready to go. Since you had nothing better to do, you decided to just chill on the bleachers until practice ended.

- You sat down on the bleachers, mainly doodling in your notebook until you happened to look up and notice a certain red head watching you. You figured you’d just caught his eye being one of the lone figures on the nearly empty bleachers so you paid it no mind, even if it made your heart race a little.

- Once practice ended, Pink jogged over and told you where to meet him before heading into the school to hit the showers. Unbeknownst to you, Benny caught up with him and tried to act nonchalant as he asked questions about you. After some less than subtle conversation, Benny convinced him to bring you to one of their beer busts.

- When he first brought up the idea to you, you thought he was kidding; parties like that just weren’t your thing especially when you barely knew any of the attendees. You only agreed to come after some “begging” on his side even though you felt like you’d regret it the instant you did.

- It wasn’t long before the day of the party arrived and you found yourself leaving the passenger seat of Pinks car to maneuver your way through a sea of drunken bodies and plastic cups.

- Pink made a beeline for the keg and you followed, not too keen on getting separated from the only person there that you actually knew. Once you made it out of the crowd, you realized just who was parked next to the keg and sitting in the bed of their truck.

“Hey, Pink, man, you made it! Oh and who’s this?” The red head asked as your friend tried not to laugh.

- Benny hopped down from his seat as you were introduced, patting you on the back with a greeting before Pink excused himself to go chat with Jodi. Your heart raced as he started a conversation with you; here you were talking with your long time crush and he was actually interested in what you had to say.

- Soon enough the two of you moved your talk over to the front seat of his truck where you could better hear each other. It was there that he decided to shoot his shot and ask you out. The instant the words left his mouth you wondered if you really were dreaming. You’d imagined the moment for so long that it didn’t feel real.

- You snapped out of your daze, realizing that you hadn’t given him an answer. The smile he gave you once you agreed took your breath away. He offered you a ride home and you once again agreed, quickly finding Pink and telling him everything before hopping into Bennys passenger seat.

- You thought you were excited for your date? You should have seen Benny after he dropped you off, the boy was off the walls.

- For your first date he took you to a park and the two of you laid out on the grass together, talking, eating and laughing. You were happy to find that you liked the real Benny just as much as you liked the idea of him.

- Your first kiss happened as you were laying down together, propped up on your elbows, chatting. He was teasing you a little, leaning in closer and closer until he finally connected your lips. It didn’t take very long for the kiss to deepen and you sure as hell weren’t complaining.

- A few more dates and the two of you were officially an item. ...You should really thank Pink one of these days.

- There’s a lot of pda; he’s got no shame when it comes to loving you.

- He makes fun of you for being shorter than him while also thinking about how cute you’d look in his clothes.

- He’s constantly teasing and making flirty comments towards you.

- He likes surprising you with stuff he made in wood shop class.

- Ass smacks and grabbing. The man can’t leave your backside alone.

- You always get shotgun when you’re riding with him.

- Late night drives around town.

- Cutting class with him every once in a while.

- He likes doodling on your stuff. Every now and again you’ll find little four leaf clovers and footballs on your papers.

- The two of you always seem to be laughing with each other although considering he’s quite the smartass it isn’t all that surprising.

- He’ll make some snide joking remark and then do that “love you, love youuuu” thing afterwards so that you, hopefully, don’t get upset with him.

- Exaggerated kisses on your cheek and head.

- He keeps a picture of you in his glove compartment and taped to his gym locker. He likes being able to look at it when he’s nervous or stressed.

- Cheering him on at his games. He likes being able to kiss you on the field after his team wins.

- Walking together with his hand in your back pocket.

- He’s devoted to walking you to class. He literally leaves his own classes early so that he can wait for you outside of yours.

- Sitting in the bed of his truck with him. The two of you probably have a few picnics there or wind up sleeping in it.

- He likes to dip you when he kisses you.

- Sometimes he’ll just throw you over his shoulder and carry you off, giving your butt a pat as he does so.

- Trying to feign interest when he shows off his paddle to you.

- He’s not great at comforting people but he does try when you need him to... although, he’s more like a coach than a therapist.

- Fast food dates.

- Carnival and arcade dates. He’s won you so many prizes.

- Hugging him whenever you’re standing together, he’ll usually wrap an arm around you in return.

- He loves cuddling and that’s just a fact. He’ll find a way to snuggle you no matter what you’re doing; at least while you’re alone together.

- Sitting on his lap. He likes being able to show off that you’re his.

- When he’s jealous, he tends to make jokes at the expense of whoever is bothering him. He isn’t afraid to be outwardly aggressive either so the instant they get just a little too “friendly” he’s ready to shut them down quick.

- You’re his girl forever and always, he’d never even think about cheating on you but you still probably feel a little insecure when girls are lining up to try and fuck the highschool football team. He thinks it’s kinda cute when you get jealous but after a little teasing he reassures you that he doesn’t want any of them, only you.

- Sharing stories with each other.

- Spending your summers together.

- He goes ballistic on the Fourth of July so expect to spend the day with him having the time of your lives.

- Being a little rough with each other. He jokingly; and softly, puts you in headlocks and tosses you around a little. Believe me, its fun.

- Makeout sessions. You know, some of your best kisses have happened while the both of you were a little tipsy.

- Since him and his friends are always doing dumb shit you’ve most likely tagged along on some their adventures. He always teases that he’ll protect you when you go off to do something dangerous or scary.

- Even though he’s very protective of his beer he’ll always give you one if you want it.

- More often than not, you’ll be left to deal with and comfort your drunken boyfriend after one of his beer busts.

- Wearing his ring.

- Double dates.

- Stealing each other’s food.

- If you have a problem with someone, he’s going to deal with it. You could just make some offhanded comment about how a person was rude or annoying and the next time he sees them he handles it.

- Fights don’t happen very often even though he has a bit of a temper. Whenever you do fight he’ll get upset and argue, maybe slam a door or something, but he never really raises his voice.

- He gets sort of uncomfortable when he has to apologize. He’s not used to making up with people, especially not girls so bear with him when he’s stumbling through his “sorry’s”.

- He’s a mamas boy and you can quote me on that. It’s absolutely adorable even though he gets embarrassed whenever you mention it or happen to catch some particularly sweet moment.

- Your parents are either clueless about his hobbies and love him or know about them all too well and hate him. Although if they’re fine with kids getting plastered then I suppose they’ll like him just fine.

- Supporting his goals and future football career.

- He’s in it for the long run baby, are you?

[yandere2me2]

Hi there! First, I just wanted you to know that I really enjoy your writing. I don’t know most of the characters you write for, but I still am able to understand who they are as people from your works which is really cool!! Secondly, I was hoping I could hear your thoughts on the Obey Me characters? You can do as little or as many as you want, whatever you’re comfortable with. And finally, I just wanted to say I hope you have a good day!

Thanks anon! So far I’ve only written a few things, but if you wanna check out what characters I’ll write for, check out my newly posted rules post - for any fandom listed, I’m good writing any character so long as the other rules are followed (ex: any Obey Me character but Luke since he looks and acts like a child).

Since no limit was placed, I’ll just do some general headcanons for the first 4 brothers for now. Know that I’m willing to write about any other characters in Obey Me aside from Luke for future requests :)

So without further ado, some yandere Obey Me bros (under the cut because this got LONG)!

TW: implied/mentioned forced captivity, manipulation, unhealthy relationship standards, non-con/dub-con, degradation, voyeurism  

Lucifer

Sadistic - but that’s a given with the game information. To be more specific, he sets strict rules for his darling and is very much a control freak; he has so many things going on in his life that he has to manage out of necessity, but his darling is a special case he’ll gladly take on 

If his darling breaks a rule, he enjoys doling out punishments. What type of punishment depends on his mood, the type of incident his darling caused, and if their actions affected Diavolo. God help them if if they insult Diavolo

Possessive with a capital P. His darling is his. No one gets to see them fall to pieces under his hands but him. No one gets to bring them to the peak of pleasure but him. They will fear him the most above all others if that’s the way his darling must cope with his methods. Lucifer would prefer an amicable relationship, but he understands he’ll be met with resistance with the standards he has

Praise will come rarely, so any darling that craves it will have to earn it by being on their best behavior. If his darling does manage to get him to praise them, he’s in a very good mood and will be more open to requests (he won’t let them go, but some new books, hobby materials, or food options are fair game)

He’s a yandere that will lock his darling away for their safety as well as his own comfort and ease. Dangers are everywhere in Devildom, and he knows his darling will manage to find trouble if left to their own devices or with his brothers. He’s not going to risk it. Besides, he’ll have a better hold on his darling if he’s the only one they interact with daily

Going off the last point, Lucifer would also hide his darling away to avoid Diavolo’s attention. By my read on their relationship, Lucifer holds little power to oppose Diavolo thanks to their pact, and Diavolo wanting in on Lucy’s darling would frustrate him beyond words - can’t he have just one thing for himself? I’ll be writing more on a Diavolo/Lucifer/Darling situation after requests are filled, but BOY do I wanna write about this now

Mammon

He’s needy. Mammon craves affection from his darling in any amount they’re willing to give. He’ll be the first to deny it if his darling or someone else points it out, but everyone knows

He Does Not Like To Share His Darling! At all!!! He will pout and whine and get even more clingy if he thinks his darling so much as looks at someone else with interest (imagined or not) - especially his brothers

His punishments are usually to reassure himself that he’s in charge, that his darling did him wrong and they should be grateful he’s their protector, that he even bothered to notice them in the first place. Any other demon would have left them to fend for themselves; he is the best demon a puny human like his darling could ask for

That said, when he isn’t worked up he’s very much a sub in his relationship with his darling and aims to please them. Praise doesn’t come too often for him, and he loves when he can get any positive affirmation. He’ll get testy if his darling outright insults him

He wouldn’t think about locking his darling away until much later. After his darling grows accustomed to living in Devildom, after Mammon starts realizing and (unwillingly) accepting his feelings, he notices how close his darling is with his brothers and the others, how easily they could be stolen away from him… he doesn’t like it one bit

Mammon wouldn’t think much about his plan before he sets things in motion by making a deal with some witches to set up a private space for him and his darling that no one can reach without his say-so. This of course incurs a ton of debt that he’s confident he’ll pay off in a jiffy (he won’t) and he only leaves when he needs to handle paying off his debts or deal with some Devildom official business - he’s the second most powerful demon brother under Lucifer, so as obnoxious as Mammon could be about how “important” he is, he’s not entirely wrong

If he’s in a good mood, he’ll spoil his darling as best he can with any material good he can think they’ll like. Just name it and it’s theirs. Unless of course they upset him, then he’s just as quick to take any privileges he gives away and remind them who’s in charge. It makes him hurt to have to punish his darling, so he tries to avoid it unless he thinks they need a reminder of who has to make the rules around here

Leviathan

Levi doesn’t have much experience with darlings compared to his brothers - throughout the thousands of years he’s lived alongside his brothers, he prefers to shut himself away most of the time. He’s had the least amount of darlings in his lifetime, and when they pass on he secludes himself to fantasize about his perfect darling (who’s usually based on a combination of anime characters and past darlings he’s had)

He’s so insecure, constantly worrying how he isn’t good enough that he bullies his darling into having them convince him that he’s who they want. His darling better be convincing though; if he senses pity or fear or anything else that takes away from their sincerity, he won’t be kind when he’s punishing them

He’s almost as overbearing as Mammon - that’s a feat in itself. Levi won’t isolate his darling though; he’ll manipulate and guilt his darling into wanting to stay with him to avoid his ire. They’ll manage to step on his toes in one way or another, finding some unspoken overstep as an excuse to point out their flaws

Honestly the “transport yourself into a video game” trope opens up so many fun options for Levi to play with his darling. He has games (similar to the one we witness in canon) where he and his darling can spend virtual weeks together without anyone to disturb them. He has games he knows his darling hates - horror games that are gruesome for demons, let alone a human, where his darling can’t escape and can die as many times as it takes for Levi to be pleased before he transports them back out. He has naughty games for when he wants to import his darling to watch them endure whatever scenarios fit his fancy - anything from tentacle porn to gangbangs. By the end of it, his darling will be so grateful to be back in the real world they’ll be begging to stay with him, just as long as they don’t have to go back in a game. Levi uses the affection to his advantage

He forces role play on his darling - Levi as the Lord of Shadows and his darling as his precious Henry. His darling better learn their lines and how Levi likes them to respond if they want to stay on Levi’s good side

His darling’s wardrobe consists of mostly Ruri-chan and Henry cosplay Levi purchases for them. No you can’t change my mind

Of course, if his darling isn’t in a game or reading some top manga series, Levi’s talking about it to them or having them watch/read along with him. He just wants to share what he enjoys with the person he treasures, even if they’re just a simple normie human

Satan

Earlyon, his darling is warned by the other brothers that his smile is fake, that he’scynical and shouldn’t be trusted. But out of all the brothers, he comes acrossas one of the least intimidating, so it’s easy to gravitate towards him

Tbhhe’s likely not interested in his darling at first – humans are lessercreatures to demons, food for most and potentially nuisances when one makes apact with a powerful demon. Until he finds something noteworthy, like how quicklyMammon forms a pact with this human, he doesn’t see much potential

He’s pretty reasonable up until he’s angry; for a darling surrounded by dangers and demons,he appears to be the least likely to harm them, and they accidentally push one of hisbuttons at some point. Once his limit is reached, he is terrifying – wrath isin his name and he lets his darling know when he’s displeased

After the first time he loses his temper, he’ll givehis darling clear warnings before he punishes them. He uses his darling’s fearof his punishments to his advantage, encouraging “good” behavior with thethreat of “or else” in the background

He has some notable similarities with the eldest brother: a sadistic streak a mile long and a preference to dominate/need for control to ensure his darling is undoubtedly his. How Satan shows these traits is different in key ways, however

Satan is sadistic more often when he’s feeling neglected, miffed, or bored with his darling. He’s not as strict as Lucifer, actually allowing his darling the freedom to act on their own accord in most cases. It gives his darling the chance to show him how much devotion they are willing to give him without him commanding it. If he gives an order, however, he expects his darling to obey

Unlike Lucifer, Satan doesn’t have the risk of things going Bad if something doesn’t go his way; Lucifer needs to please Diavolo or risk failing on his end of the pact, and so control is key for him. Satan likes control, but to the extent of knowing he has the final say. Satan doesn’t want to control every aspect of his darling - at the end of the day he wants his darling to voluntarily choose him, even if only out of fear of his displeasure - but he will have them

Satan has his own possessive habits - he needs affirmations that his darling is his. Either he’s marking them in some primal way or he has his darling reassure him through their actions

He stalks his darling. Have you seen how aware he is of his brothers’ activities in-game? It’s almost unnerving in some situations - and that’s just canon material. Satan watches his darling out of curiosity at first before it grows into an obsession for him. After a while he knows every little detail, every mannerism, every preference. All those outings he asked his darling to join him on before he actually clarifies he wants to date them? They’re all used as opportunities for Satan to review later

Advice to any darling of his: Do NOT compare him to Lucifer if you know what’s good for you. Just. Don’t. He won’t kill you, but you will wish he did by the time he’s through with you

I say this as several of my points are comparing his similarities/differences with Lucifer hahaaaaaaaa sorry Satan

[thesummerstorms]

For the characters HCs Darman? He's so precious and we need *more*

Link the meme here. Accepting, but if you send me the whole meme as opposed to specifics it might take a bit. Thank you to anon for the ask.

clothing style.

Dar dresses pretty simply even after he leaves the army. Bright cheery shades of color -anything but red or maybe orange- and well fitting, but comfy. Probably starts wearing dad cardigans very early on. Lots of space!hoodies, which Etain steals. Comfy, practical, cheery. Likes to roll up the sleeves of things to his upper forearm because Etain notices ™ and also keeping the fabric out of the way of whatever he’s working on. That said, he spends as much time in armor as civvies.

before - bed routine.

In barracks, his routine is exceedingly simple. Dar is one of those people who dozes off easy, so he more or less wraps up whatever he’s doing,  figures out the best way to secure the door or react to it opening, washes his face and brushes his teeth and is out. Never trust that you’ll actually get all 8 hours of sleep you’ve been promised.

Out of barracks, it’s a little bit more indulgent. If they have the water/aren’t rationing, Dar likes a second hot shower before he goes to sleep. Checks on the little ones, small snack or maybe hot chocolate, brush teeth. If he’s at home with Etain or they’re deployed to the same place, the he typically has to go retrieve her and coax her into bedtime - he can and sometimes does fall asleep while she’s still working but drastically prefers the bed with her in it even more so with her in his arms or holding him- maybe listen to Etain read or flip through a holozine for the roughly 10 minutes it takes him to pass out. (Etain frequently is taking things out of his hands after he falls asleep.)

In the Rhedian/Etain/Dar verse he has to track them both down, probably, and then they negotiate who gets to be the middle and who gets to be the edge. Darman can only sleep facing the door while laying on his side, so if he’s on the outer edge of the bed, he’s the little spoon and whoever curls up behind him has their arm on his hip, and if he’s in the middle or outer edge he’s big spooning

eating habits

Darman eats a lot. While he’s in GAR he eats big meals and eats them quickly, and it takes a few years after getting out to change the habit in any significant way, but left to his own devices in peace time he’d be a grazer. He doesn’t have strong preferences, taste-wise, but he loves novelty of food choices, even when his wife and kids are slightly intimidated.

As it is, he snacks a lot and is completely unabashed at eating things off of Etain or a brother’s plate. He makes up for it by becoming an excellent cook and spoiling his loved ones with their favorites. Absolutely steals all of the sweets Etain isn’t overly attached to, but makes up for it by offering her a lot of his fruit. Always drinks from her caf cup. When he gets the cure and his metabolism slows down a bit, it takes getting used to.

concept of home and family

He’s got a very, very Mandalorian view of family. Home is where his brothers and Etain and the kids are not only around him but safe and comfortable. Family isn’t blood- it’s the people who he can rely on to have his back no matter what who have chosen to show him love and trust and earn it in return. It’s a chosen obligation and support network.

hobbies.

Cooking, working out, sparring, casual team and pairs sports (though it’s as much about the challenge/social interaction as him actually giving a shit about sports), reading general-interest just casually informative holozines (like, space!Time or NatGeo) , watching the odd romantic holo, playing with his kids,  word puzzles

fighting style.

listen, I do not know enough about SW weaponry /combat or even real life weaponry and combat to answer this question thoroughly. I do think he looks into at least the basics of Teras-Kasi once Sith start showing up looking for his kids.

what calms your muse down after a bad day?

It depends on the kind of bad day. If he’s feeling drained, sometimes a hot shower, a cup of hot chocolate, sitting with Etain as she meditates, his legs bracketing hers and letting her deep breathing set the pace or else just outright cuddling.

But  if he’s restless or overloaded or angry he kicks everyone else out of the kitchen so he can be alone and takes it out on the vegetables until a particularly difficult technique or recipe distracts him and pulls him out of his head a bit. Occasionally he goes back to his roots and works on some stripped down demolitions projects at the nearest work bench. Working out alone doesn’t help in that kind of mood because he’s still in his own thoughts, but if he’s up to being around other people, sparring or some sort of high-intensity pairs game (slingball, etc) does. 

(Depending on her own mood/the reason for the upset Etain sometimes starts out sparring with him but is amenable to shifting to other distractions, too. Sometimes they skip straight to the pinning down if she notices he needs to burn tension and who ever starts off gets the go ahead.)

ways your muse says i love you.

his love language is in nurturing and gift-giving. he’s highly sensitive to small changes in his loved ones demeanor and part of his way of showing them he loves them is immediately trying to give or do something to make them feel better. have they eaten? do they need painkillers?  what’s small thing he can do or give to fix it?

alternatively if it’s less of a “need immediate support” situation he’s still trying to figure out what small thing he can give to show his affection: a stolen gift for Etain, sharing a food he’s fond of, double checking Rhedian’s kit for her without asking, or something he’s made for them in particular “I thought of you, and I want you to be content”.

describe your muse’s laugh.

softer than you’d think, but Dar has a terrible time forcing laughter, so if you hear it it’s warm and genuine or angry/bitter AF and which ever emotion it is feels readily apparent.

what items can be found in your muse’s pockets

assuming we’re just talking civvie pockets and not his gear belt then the star wars equivalent of a swiss army knife, credits, a false identchip (he swaps out which one), spare blank datachip, comlink/holoprojector combo, hard candies that are less prone to melting or some sort of snack, his wedding ring if he’s working on something dirty or delicate, sometimes little handwritten notes Etain has left him on flimsiplast, a stylus and a all-materials marker of some sort 

talk about your muse’s most prized possession(s)

Dar really doesn’t get too hung up on possessions. His wedding ring is highly sentimental but if push comes to shove can be replaced. The only thing he couldn’t easily abandon would be the very few holos he has of his first squad (which, like, SW has the Cloud, right?), a few surviving love letters of Etain’s, and maybe when he’s older and his brothers start dying some of their armor plates.

describe your muse’s walk

He always tends to walk like he’s wearing Katarn armor even if he isn’t: chest forward, long strides, walking with intent and clearing civvies easily out of his way. He does fuck up a knee as an older man, but unlike Kal, no one has to beg him to go to treatment and it only bothers him if he’s been extremely rough on it or he’s run down in general.

talk about your muse’s accent.

A weird, hard to place amalgam unless you know that he’s a clone commando. Part basic non-distinct Core World Broadcast Pronunciation from lots of flash training as a young child, the slightest edge of Kuat and of Keldabe from learning from Kal Skirata, eventual hard edge to his Mando’a that’s unique to the Neshurok district on Nar Shadda. People tend to be surprised he doesn’t sound Concordian, but he didn’t have enough exposure to Fett for that.

describe your muse’s smile

wide, artless, not the “crooked and charming” type so much as genuinely expansive

how often does your muse get sick?

Not too often- he has a good immune system, special genetic modification, and more vaccinations than any reasonable being could keep track of. That said, it’s impossible to avoid getting sick forever with kids.

does your muse know when to rest, or do they push themselves?

Dar’s a lot better at giving himself physical rest (training to make the best use of his efforts and preserve his ability to keep going kicking in) than mental rest in a daily context, though he absolutely has overdone it on missions (conditioning that you are less than your objective and replaceable is a bitch.)

does your muse snore? sleeptalk? sleepwalk?

He snores. Etain says terribly, he says he’s not as bad as any of the rest of Omega, which may or may not be true.

the thing(s) your muse thinks about before falling asleep.

depends on the night. anything from galactic politics to memory of his first squad to the annoying squeak from the air vent that needs looking at to the breathlessness edge of Etain’s voice or her touch before they finally settled down

is your muse a fitful or a quiet sleeper?

Darman has nightmares that wake him up and leave him upset, but unless you’re a Jedi it can be hard to tell because he doesn’t move around very much in his sleep until he wakes up full of adrenaline and gasping. On a normal night, he’s a pretty quiet sleeper and most of his movement comes from adjusting to Etain, who absolutely is restless. That said, he’s fairly easy to wake.

your muse’s thoughts on cops and other authority figures

Cops are initially sorted into the Jaller Obrim schema of tentative friendship/support, but that falls by the wayside pretty quickly when he’s a fugitive from the galactic regime. 

He’s respectful of authority figures in theory and knows how to follow a chain of command, clone-officers being easily followed, but his experiences with Jedi Generals who didn’t know what they were doing, outright malevolent Imperial Army officials, the constant threat of death from the Kaminoans, Kal’s subtle manipulations, etc all mean he keeps a weary eye on them until they prove otherwise.

He doesn’t strive to be an iconoclast, but he’s inherently aware of the danger authority figures pose to his survival and those he loves.

skills and special talents.

cooking, singing, hand to hand, demolitions, shooting, chemistry, covert ops, battlefield first aid, good listener, decent at sketches though he doesn’t pursue it

disabilities or illnesses. 

Darman has very clear PTSD plus possibly some other comorbid mental health conditions. He does have old battle injuries that bother him somewhat as he gets older, including one knee, but nothing that’s immediately physically obvious or debilitating espc since he gets appropriate medical care.

habits and mannerisms.

lots of soft humming or mouthing a song he will never sing alone in front of strangers, deceptively calm expression even when he’s ruminating, going over his gear and equipment for the fifth time as a comfort thing

introvert or extrovert.

Ambivert.

religious or non - religious

Ambivalent- He’s married to a Jedi and the father of multiple Force-using kids, so he can’t exactly deny the whole Force-thing, but he doesn’t philosophize it the way Etain inherently does.

As for te kara’se… again, ambivalence. When Etain start taking to a… worship isn’t precisely right, but neither is relationship with Tarre Vizsla and Ranah teh Naast, he listens and doesn’t disapprove, but also doesn’t necessarily disagree. If he speaks to the Mand’alore of old, if he sometimes asks for advice, when his brothers have gone quiet too long or his wife’s blood is spotting his armor or his children are crying in fear… he doesn’t know whether or not he expects them to listen.The asking is still worth something, though. He’s likely to ask his brothers in the manda too, as much as anything else.

something your muse could never forgive.

injuries to his loved one, especially life-threatening or shattering ones, especially purposeful neglect or abuse or the cheap spending of their life. It’s easier to forgive his own blood spilt than that of his heart.

something that makes your muse smile.

naps in the sunshine, his kids being goofballs or learning something new. a brother earning some new happiness, the little looks Etain gives him when they talk without talking, the pleasure of a new taste or mastering a new skill, someone running his fingers through his hair or holding his hand

something that scares your muse.

the constant risk to his wife and children, and once the Mandalorian “Great Purge” starts to his entire family. the possibility of somehow letting down or disappointing or becoming estranged from a brother. Kaminoans, for years. his own anger, sometimes.

something that gives your muse hope.

Koa and Kad and Scout sitting around the family table solving a problem together, Koa with her aruetii science degree in one hand and a musical instrument in the other, Kad holding baby Etta (Dar’s granddaughter) tightly to his chest with a look of wonder on his face, Etta and Sivvar (Kad’s husband) laughing as they paint a mural on a bare expanse of wall, Etain wrapping a niece or nephew in her cloak as she holds them and smiling quietly back over her shoulder at him, Fi with a baby strapped to his chest, Atin and Laseema curled quietly together in an oversized arm chair, the first time he sees excitement in Niner’s face after the war

how your muse responds to being helped / taken care of.

He’s not used to in originally. With strangers he’s excessively polite, but with someone he actually loves and trusts, he gets incredibly soft- lots of little touches to their hands/arms (or face/neck if romantic or as platonically close as Omega) and his shoulders just kind of unspool tension

how your muse responds to unconditional love.

Similar to the above, but Dar’s loyalty runs deep, and he’s a romantic and a family-oriented person, so it tends to inspire devotion

how your muse responds to danger

To himself, a reasonable amount of stress or anger, but mostly his instincts kick in until later when he potentially has the ability to process how fucked the situation was. he becomes very decisive under pressure but he isn’t taught how to handle it after until he’s been fighting for years.

how your muse responds to stress. // how your muse responds to anger.

He tries to hide a lot of it to avoid being a burden, and it’s way more successful than you’d think. He doesn’t start developing explicit coping skills until after the war and his break down, although he does talk to Omega and Etain about it, alternating between showing them his soul in an expression of trust and hiding things so as not to trouble them.

With anger his protective anger is the easiest to glimpse at first, but eventually it comes out in other situations- normally the thought of being lied to or deceived or used. With all of the above, he gets cold and harsh until it tips too far. Less yelling than quiet anger.

 He’s not by nature inherently violent, but between his training and untreated PTSD, there are episodes where he feels as if he loses control of himself entirely and retreats to the violence he was taught would keep him alive. Part of his recovery is learning to stop things before they get there and recognize his own threat response.

With stress, see the above about bad days. also probably some explicitly PTSD related coping strategies but I’ll admit I haven’t researched that

did your muse grow up too fast?

Absolutely. Dar may have been socially naive on his first deployment, but he didn’t have a childhood, he had a product development phase haunted by the threat of Kaminoan culling.

[pinkcloudsnightlightbell-remade]

TW heavy

For once I don't feel like asking advice would be a sign of weakness.

I WANT AND DESERVE MORE. I WANT TO LIVE. I DONT WANT TO KEEP WANTING TO DIE. I DONT WANT THIS AND I WANT SOMETHING DIFFERENT. LIFE AND STRENGTH AND LOVE SEEMS SO FAR AWAY TIL RECENTLY. BUT IM STILL SO TRAUMATIZED AND SO PRONE TO DEREALIZING. HEALTH AND HAPPINESS ISNT A PRIVILEGE RIGHT...? I WANT MORE. ISNT LIFE A RIGHT

Even if my parents have done their middle class most to feed house and even help get me out of credit pits and even though they aren't physically abusive they have been abusive to my older sister who committed suicide after secretly being a victim of child sexual assault dismissive neglectful emotionally mute narcissistic feudalistic and ableist and rape apologists. I HAVE built up this role and this mask where I am tolerable to them so they do not find me problematic day to day. I keep telling myself that I can be bitter but I just can't shake this feeling that maybe I'm just an entitled millennial who got cucked and I'm wrong. But I have been formulating a plan to get a diploma while I am under their roof then run away one night with some money saved and live alone instead of doing this song and dance of bad class analysis where I pretend like I'm not supposed to be doing anything remotely political just put my head down work make money be less of an embarassment go to a bank get loans just to get degrees certificates jobs get cars move around be socially pleasant meet someone to make babies with (I'm bisexual/pansexual and poly...But I am trans and my parents have major issues confronting that even if they pretend to be absolutely progressive minded" (TM) like being literate and half way informed is the same thing as actually really thinking about microaggressions and oppressive behaviours they enact in oorder to be better supports which they haven't) and while their ~support~ of me being mentally ill/disabled and actively suicidal is something that did come across the first week of our bereavement--literal days before the funeral-- their twisted toxic manner of mourning has made me suicidal at least three times as of 27th December 2018; and their responses to coming out as transmasculine and bi was dont get all PC snowflake on us (Read:shut up about it unless we feel ready to go ask you curtly and rudely) and then two days after when I actually felt soft and tender enough to say I had visions of dying violently because of how terribly small and useless I currently feel they begged and begged me to make calls on my own and handle things myself because Hey We Are Really The Ones Who Are Suffering And Mourning Why Are TWO of Our Daughters Suicidal I Am Truly Suffering. Implied--"we will have insurance cover this therapy shit you should be happy haven't we mentioned it to your idiot face already just leave us alone about this shit". I may have had to survive day after day through my depression since 2014 by thinking they weren't people to open up to but that doesn't mean that they can say that. Imply that. They CANNOT

They cannot.

But they did.

They did it. They fucking did that when my heart finally came around to a place of, "Well I understand that they haven't experienced surviving and being a victim of violence and victim blaming and being transgender is foreign and even vilified so that's fair and here are all their siblings coming to the funeral to feed and help us in the aftermath and to keep us housed through all the preparations so how come, among and amidst all this compassion, they seem so hit by Stupid Bitch disease? Wtf why *shouldnt* anybody deal with depression by themself!

" I don't know that all the fear you felt before this bereavement of being in the same room holds up when they can just be seen as foolish and immature. You can 100% deal through therapy with the ableism and gaslighting you endured the silence around your constant issues with being fired at jobs you hated the the moments of realizing they want to be white passing and are sociopathically happy to be alone and have no hobbies and live in codependent relationships where they treat others like infant children or wayward siblings who need a firm hand but not heart to heart talks or reassurances or loving toughness... so just try to be uncomfortable and just shore up and bolster your underlying hope of seeing your long held affectionate blindly loyal love reciprocated.

"Keep up that small hope and bury all your pain and your furious and sour resentment if it means their happiness is number one in my life. Just do it Isagani! Do that... because it is Good." I tried it and I fell apart. I functioned for a week or two but now I am just as prone to sleeping and alcoholism and moreover, I want to escape but now I feel like hiding my desires to just pay my own way through art college and transitioning in a nearby city is nothing compared to our long history of living as a dysfunctional but somewhat stable household. /:

I FEEL like I understand I should leave but I suddenly feel ... IDK like I'm sinning before Jesus himself. What would it mean to pick up a backpack my laptop and a suitcase of clothes and some money and just go...and... Wouldn't it destroy their happiness and their legitimacy as NOT bigoted parents and NOT bad community members and NOT hypocritical and NOT at all to be blamed. ////:

I would leave them a note... I would say to meet me in 2027 in a town I feel has a small leftist community called Tavistock in South Devon in Britain and I would leave a blog entry where I detail my grief and my pain.

I wrote the post one evening on the 19th where I realized I've been covering for them even though my little lesbian moderately autistic and anxious sister had her birthday and needs my brutal honesty and my parents to stop dismissing me the most.

It (the blog post that is) speaks to my analysis of their issues and I don't want to leave without a note because they might feel like I have just gone away in a panic and might turn up dead just as my late sister did... What I want to know is should I make an escape, or should I stay with them.

I need to decide but I feel so confused. Please help I think I ... can't see a way out

■

isagani \ 26.\ marxist feminist \ communist \ atheist \ very bi. \ filipino migrant. \ transgender nb. \ femme in the s.g.a. woman sense.(anons are open) \ 4 years past a severe depressive breakdown. \ scorpio passing