#anyway this was fun. does anyone want to ask me about my tinfoil hat gideon eyes theory

[theriverbeyond]

I would love to hear about your theory that John moved the solar system!? I’m so curious about the potential evidence!

THANK YOU FOR ASKING this is my pet theory. my baby. my lovingly crafted tinfoil hat. also pinging in @liesmyth for insight/if i forgot anything

the theory is, John moved the solar system to Elsehwere, and the Mithraeum sits in the Milky Way galaxy, where our solar system used to be.

BoE was searching for the Nine Houses for thousands of years. until proven otherwise, they are canonically the descendants of the FTL ships John let escape. so: they know where Earth is! they know where the solar system is! they had 5,000 or more years to look, AND they had spacefaring tech! why couldnt they find it?

The Mithraeum is described so lovingly it makes my brain itch. the way John calls it "home"? listen. idk it is vibes

it is "set in the midst of a circumstellar disc", "an ancient jewel within so much dead gravel". what else is a "circumstellar disc"? the Milky Way galaxy. vibes

as we learn in HtN chapter 14, the Mithraeum is "lit by thanergetic starlight". not thanergy starlight. thanergETIC. the only other thanergetic star system we know of is..... Dominicus. our sun, killed and reborn. when the cohort/lyctors flip planets, they aren't capable of turning them thanergetic. and yet!!!! the Mithraeum is surrounded by thanergetic starlight. (like yes John said that they "nuked the stars with thanergy and now they'll shine forever" but he's a lying liar who lies, and we KNOW that killing a planet with thanergy doesn't turn it thanergetic. so like..... what is up with that)

John CAN TERAFORM. in NtN, John 19:18, he is described as "rais[ing] up parts of the earth that had been covered by sea". we know he can control the human body but this is a WHOLE new dimension and level to his powers and its implications are wholly unexplored. i can believe that he has (or had, at the time) the power to move a solar system.

The Mistborn Connection. John & Rashek parallels are just really strong and i can't ignore that. Rashek moved the planets around and therefore I think it is not impossible that John might have as well

so the question next is: why? why would john do this? and i think there are 2, potentially overlapping options:

fear and guilt, like a child hiding the cup they broke. John did not do this out of malice. he was scared and overwhelmed and fucked things up because of it, and maybe he hid our solar system because he couldn't bear to face the consequences or awknowledge the true extent of what he had done

it was an accident. John ate everything, killed everything, and he was absolutely not in his right mind when trying to put everything back. and not only that, he went to medical school, which as i (someone going to clinical science school) can tell you, means you know jack fucking shit about astrophysics and planetary science. he's only human, even if he became a god. he was unqualified and very stressed.... anyway let me tell you. if that was me we would all be soup

like i KNOW this is kind of ridiculous and weird. and it is tinfoil hat enough that i wouldn't be pressed at all if it turns out to be totally nothing. but like. it COULD be something, ya know?