vogelmeister · 2 years ago
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sometimes im shocked with my genius
#ok so i decided i wanted to write another play but i wasn���t ready to let go of merel’s world yet#after all its only been a year and honestly i think I want to really flesh out merel’s amsterdam which is very hard#bc i see her as a lonely character where liesbeth is truly her rock#so I decided to start exploring the anne fleur relationship bc its quite prominent to merel as its her first real relationship#anyways i was watching emily in paris (i know) and i was thinking about AF meeting Dirk Jan after Belgium and what it would be like#and its canon in WOL that he knows about Merel but not really. he thinks they’re friends#and so im writing the forst meeting and i was almost going to make anne fleur confess abt merel#THEN I REMEMBERED that in my de diepte piece Merel confesses she met DJ at a party#so im like why not make that a scene#then I realised AF could withold the truth about Merel#in the first meeting#and dutch doesn’t have a seperate word for girlfriend and just a girl friend#so when Merel meets DJ I could potentially use that as a double meaning or something where AF is like#‘oh merel is een vriendin’ and everyone somehow skips over that she said een instead of mijn and so DJ reads it as a friend#or AF is completely planning to stay loyal and is drunk and the fact she uses een is foreshadowing#idk i think im onto something#my issue is as both a native speaker and an ex aspiring dutch teacher i feel merel would pick up on this#like its definitely not something she’d miss#you could also make merel a whole ass metaphor#like merel is a metaphor for my love for the netherlands#dutch language found dead
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karma-jinx · 5 years ago
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ML Chat Blac BreakDown *Spoilers*
HOLY SHIT!!! That episode was a fucking rollercoaster I swear! I didn’t have a moments rest. I just need to breakdown what I just watched so bare with me. This isn’t gonna be like my usual ML Babbles.
Reminder: I DO NOT KNOW FRENCH! I understood things to the best of my abilities.
OK! First things first! We see Gabe talking to Emilie about how he’ll get the miraculous and what not. After that we have the girls all hanging out with what looks like a friend picnic sorta thing.
Apparently Alix and Rose has some sorta bet on whether or not Marinette was going to give Adrien the gift she made him. Alix said she wouldn’t while Rose said she would.
Alix wins the bet and a stuffed unicorn, which cause Rose to become aggressive. Seemed like she was being aggressively supportive in telling Marinette to try again. Hyping up our girl. Which works and Marinette goes back to his place to try again.
Except she gets turned down at the door. But Marinette is still determined to leave the gift. Tells Tikki she’s gonna go in through the window, which Tikki HEAVILY disagrees with for very good and obvious reasons. But Marinette goes through with it anyways and sneaks into his room.
But does our girl simply leave her gift and go? NOPE! Despite being in his room before she’s still in total awe that it’s his room she’s in. (To be fair this is the first time she’s in his room with out a some sort of akuma involved. Or party since this comes after Party Crasher.)
So she’s gawking and swooning. Smelling his pillow and shiz. (You do you sweetie. I not gonna judge) Finally she snaps too when she hears Adrien come home from his fencing match. (Which seems like he won AND wanted to tell his no good father about it but was told not to disturb him.)
Quickly Marinette leaves the gift and runs off. Only to remember that she forgot to sigh her name and quickly does so. As she leaves through Adrien walks in and sees her. The finds the gift she left that’s signed by Marinette. And FINALLY puts two and two together and figures out Marinette is ladybug. We see flashbacks of when she tells him she’s in love with someone else. That HE’S the someone else. And he couldn’t be happier!!!
Poor Plagg tried to detour his thoughts and say it wasn’t her but failed. So he reminds Adrien that their identities are suppose to be a secret. He isn’t suppose to know. But Adrien is too happy to care. He goes to where the girls are hanging out.
Here we see Marinette talking to them about how she left the gift sorta. Basically a vague excuse of some sort to say she left it but not how she left it. But then suddenly Adrien is there and she’s shoved in his direction. We see him with soft but love struck eyes as he most likely gushes to her. And she assumed it was about the gift. But he says he loves her and leans in for a kiss. And so at long last our dumb kids are happily together!
We see small flash backs of them at school. (Chloe’s jealous af but who cares. Wish I say Lila’s reaction to this but oh well.) A slow dance on what looks like Juleka’s boat. Luka appears in this flash back but he seems unbothered that their together. Kagami doesn’t seem to appear in any of the flashbacks though. In on of the flash backs is Nadia making a public statement of how Adrien is now dating Marinette hooray right?
WRONG!
For you see this is where it gets complicated.
That is all in an Alternate Timeline
Pre-Chat Blanc’s timeline.
Back to when ladybug leaves Adrien’s room. Bunnix comes to get her. Bringing ladybug into the “Rabbit Hole” So to speak. A place in between times. Ladybug can see all sorts of time periods. Which Bunnix covers her eyes with a bowl, since I guess she’s not suppose to see them?
Anyways, Bunnix takes her to Chat Blanc’s timeline. Bunnix doesn’t seem to know how or what happened to cause this reality. Simply telling Ladybug that she’s going to face her toughest akuma yet. Chat Noir (Blanc)
Bunnix goes back into the “Rabbit Hole” where all the other times are. She and her powers are fading. And it’s up to ladybug to save everyone. In Chat Blanc’s timeline we see a destroyed moon as well as Paris. Ladybug is utterly shocked to see the world in such a state. When she’s sees CB he’s sitting alone humming/singing to himself. She calls out to him, happily he turns around to see his lady there. Excitedly he goes over to her, seemingly unthreating, which causes Ladybug to trust him enough to let him get close enough to her to try and snatch her miraculous. But she kicks him back and goes on the defensive. Again he tries something else to get her close. This time being sad, crying even. She falls for the bait and goes up to wipe his tear. Again he tries to take her earrings. And again she knocks him over and runs off the building. Giving way to a chase. CB follows suit and calls Ladybug by her real name. Causing her to fumble her landing. She hastily denies she’s Marinette. But CB knows it’s her. And again a chase ensues.
Then we’re brought back to Bunnix who’s watching this go down. We she her move to another rabbit whole to see how thing became like this. She goes to the day Adrien and Marinette kissed. SOMETHING must have happened from that moment on. So she goes through to see what. This is where the flash backs stated earlier came from. Bunnix goes through the timeline and stops on a day where Marinette is visited by Nathalie, who’s holding and tablet where Gabe is on. Not sure what he says but it’s clearly a threat of some sort. Essentially it’s seems his telling Marinette she can’t be with his son or to break up with Adrien. He’s telling her all this in FRONT OF HER PARENTS! Sabine looks shocked and goes to comfort Marinette. Tom is furious and tells them to leave as he does the same. (Papa wolf mode! How dare they come into his business and break their daughter’s heart!)
Fast forward to Marinette outside Adrien’s house. The gate is open but she doesn’t go through. Instead she talks to Adrien from there. The Gorilla has the front door open but blocks Adrien from going out. Here and exchange of words happen. Then we she a heart broken Marinette running away. As well as a heart broken Adrien wanting to go after her. He begs the Gorilla to let him go, and the gorilla does. This is where we see Adrien running towards Marinette, then spots and akuma going for her. One apparently plotted by hawk moth. Natalie watches from a window to let hawkmoth know that Marinette is ready for the akuma. But Adrien’s seeing the akuma go after her, he didn’t care about transforming out in the open for others to see.
And others did. Marinette, the gorilla, and Natalie saw. Shocked Natalie tells his dad that Adrien is Chat Noir.
Marinette is shocked as well. Apparently Adrien kept it a secret that he knew she was Ladybug. Seeing as how she didn’t know he was CN. He smiles and seems to say something along the lines of, “he could let his lady get akumatized.” Or “he always has his lady’s back.” Either way Marinette crawls in to his lap and is comforted by his hug.
Hawkmoth on the other hand was upset to find out his son was CN. But it was short lived as now he feels that he has half of the miraculous he needs now.
Back to LB and CB fighting. We see ladybug trying to figure out where his akuma is. But it’s hard. His a difficult opponent. But she manages to get his staff but the akuma wasn’t there. Soon she’s cornered again and offers him her earrings. When he approaches though she swiftly maneuvers herself to snatch his tail while avoiding capture. But the akuma wasn’t there. CB threatens her with a blast but she refuses to give up her earrings. So he makes the platform beneath her break. Causing her to fall into the water. Here we see just how much damaged was caused by CB. Citizens are petrified in what looks like stone. Ladybug sees herself and goes to touch it but is disintegrates after being touched.
MEANING CHAT BLAC KILLED LADYBUG
Again we’re brought to Bunnix. We see what happens after Chat Noir’s ID is exposed. He and Ladybug fight Hawkmoth. Sending him crashing to where his Emilie is being kept. HM shows them his reason for the miraculous. And CN/Adrien is 🤯
He has no idea what to think. When he does react he attacks. He’s hurt and rightfully so. He goes to use a cataclysm, one that seems extra powerful due to his emotions, on his dad but stops just before he does. Asking him why.
AND YOU KNOW WHAT THE ASSHOLE DOES?!
HE KNOCKS HIS ASS ALL THE WAY TO THE EFFIEL TOWER!!! He beats up his SON!!!!
This man just whoops his ass like it’s nothing! NOTHING. He and ladybug go to Chat Noir. But HM arrives first and advances on CN. Who’s scrambling back in FEAR from his DAD. Ladybug arrives, now she and Hawkmoth try to convinces Adrien what the right thing to do is. But he’s torn. Not wanting for a decision to be made HM releases an akuma on his own fucking son! Forcing him to obey. Chat Noir struggles so much to not listen. To not cave in, but he can’t do it. And so he becomes akumatized. His first order is to attack ladybug. Force to give up her miraculous. Chat Blanc points a concentrated form of his cataclysm at her. Looking ever so hurt of what he’s doing. Ladybug tried to talk to him. But again is asshole dad orders him to obey. So Chat Blanc’s goes back and forth with his cataclysm until he can’t take it anymore and aims it upwards. A large beam shoots up and out. Cracking the moon and causing the timeline we saw Bunnix bring past ladybug too.
And here we see Chat Blanc growing tired of this game of chase. He threatens to release a cataclysm so powerful it’ll destroy the motherfucking galaxy! So she gives up. Her lucky charm gave her an eraser but she couldn’t use it. So she goes up to him, telling him that even though he’s like this she still loves him? She leans up to kiss him, but snatches his bell. Finally finding the akuma and getting rid of it.
When he comes too Chat Noir isnot sure what happened. And asks Marinette for context, but she tells him he shouldn’t know who she is. It’s here she realizes how to use her lucky charm.
Which this part is also a bit complicated. But basically she goes back and erases her name from the gift. Undoing the Chat Blanc future. Everything goes back to normal and apparently she doesn’t remember anything about the future or what happened? Bunnix seems to ask to see if she remembers too but Ladybug doesn’t recall. This part was hard for me to understand. It seemed pretty complicated.
Anyways, when Adrien sees Ladybug in his room. She comes up with some sort of excuse as to why she’s leaving a gift before she goes. She goes back to the group and tells them something too. At the end we see Chat Noir watching a sunset as he sings. He’s soon joined by Ladybug who rests her head on his shoulder. The two just enjoy the sunset together.
Sorry this one long. I just really needed to break down what I just watched since it wasn’t in a language I know. Maybe I’ll post one up about my thoughts once the English dub comes out. But who knows. 🤷‍♀️
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leggigoesabroad · 6 years ago
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we’re only here on borrowed time
Sitting on a lovely, smooth, high-speed train from Nuremberg, Germany to Paris.  Yesterday was a day from hell which I'll lightly get into but not dwell on, but for now, I'm so happy.  I'd be remiss to not mention why!!  Part of the reason I decided to book the train instead of flying from Prague to Paris was for many uninterrupted hours to listen to this new book my doctor recommended for me, called "Stress Less, Accomplish More" but Emily Fletcher.  It obviously sounds like a typical self-help book, but I have a crush on my doctor and she really sold it for me.  (BTW she's no older than like, 32, is married with two kids, super pretty, and totally gets me.  She's very female-centric and one time said 'I'll never let you leave here without a prescription for more birth control, we will never let the system be the reason you're struggling with something' after asking if I had enough for the foreseeable future.  Joke's on her, I'm single AF, but it really spoke to me.)  She said it's a book about meditation and although I've tried meditating before, I am a little bit of a natural skeptic as to allllllllll of its listed benefits.  She said this super simple technique helps you sleep better, greatly reduces anxiety/depression, get sick less often, be more effective at work, eliminate jet lag, on and on.  She said she honestly can't say enough about it and it completely changed her life.  I took this as a way to be more like her and immediately bought it.  Also because I wanted her to like me.  Incidentally, she texted me a few days ago inviting me to a new women's group she's developing for people in my demographic who are going through the same things.  Because like of COURSE she did!! She also tells me to call her Casey instead of by "Doctor" and man I should stop now this is getting weird.
Anyway, this book is by an ex-Broadway performer who noticed she was going grey at age 28 (cough cough I am too) and was sick of all the medications she used to treat these symptoms and wanted to get more at the root.  She talks about how simple this meditation method is - 15 minutes twice a day - and how it is literally the best thing she's ever done for herself in her life.  After her course, she asks people how much money it would take to stop meditating.  They all say something between "500 million dollars" and "no amount of money in the world, because what would be the point without everything else meditation gives me?"  I booked the train so I could set aside several hours to listen to the book, especially on this trip, because we all know from the Thailand blog era that being far away in new countries is often what helps me make decisions in life and really self-reflect.  Yes, I hear how extra that sounds, but I'm fine with it.  I'm only on Chapter 5 and I keep intermittently crying!!  We haven't even gotten to the part where she tells me HOW to meditate!  Just her background on why it works and the entire theory behind it.  The author talks about one case in which a guy with advanced Parkinson's started her sessions and after literally the first one, his tremors disappeared during the entire 15 minutes and for 5 minutes after.  She said when they both opened their eyes he asked if she had noticed, and she said she did, and started crying because it was arguably the most profound moment of her career.  I'm crying typing this.  Ugh.  She doesn't claim that meditation will cure chronic illnesses of course, but rather that it's the best thing one can possibly do to supplement medical instruction and for some ailments, it can indeed end up replacing them.  She said after she started the practice, she didn't get sick again (cold, flu, anything) for EIGHT AND A HALF YEARS!!  Because when the body can use sleep at night to fully rest and not just as a band-aid for stress relief, your immune system can work at its intended level and not allow any of these small things to come into play.  You'd think I'd be getting paid for this post, but alas, I'm only 5 chapters in and get ready for me to be even more insufferable than usual when I get home.
Onward.  Last I left off I was in a cafe with Lizzy in Prague.  We stayed for a few hours and actually got a lot of work done!  Turns out my freelance deadlines don't disappear when I go to Europe, hmm.  We then walked to an area called Petrin, which from afar just looks like a tree-covered hill.  It's actually an uphill path in an expansive park that ultimately overlooks the entire city of Prague.  The more we went up, I kept thinking "we must be at the top by now" and then new buildings and castles and paths and orchards would appear.  It felt like a hidden fairyland with twists and turns and new beautiful sights along the way.  I posted a pic on the gram, but at one point we came to a clearing and there was a picture-perfect snapshot of the entire city through the trees.  With the red roofs and striking architecture I again almost felt like crying.  Also saw a bunch of couples making out in the orchards with no shame all, so that was something.  Good on 'em, ay.  We stopped for a glass of wine at the top (duh) and ended up chatting about work/management styles/feelings about jobs/etc.  Something great about Lizzy is that it turns out for everything I'm interested in, she's in grad school for.  I felt like she was the manifestation of all things fascinating to me.  Kinda like when you meet someone really smart who is able to vocalize all the things you feel about things, but better.  Like Hilary, but not my sister.  Like Jay Wong, but not my boss!  We talked about Kitty and her job search and then got into the concept of finding a job by figuring out what you love and what comes naturally to you, and then seeing how you can get paid for it.  She loved hearing about Kitty and SpotX and the proposal she had to do about team-building and customer engagement, and we chatted all about different marketable skills.  I remember crying to Hil many years ago (Hil if you read this, do you remember??) about how I *thought* I was smart but I hated studying/learning/school and my grades reflected that, and how I've squandered all my potential, I'm actually really dumb, etc.  BTW in retrospect I now see a lot of that as my undiagnosed ADHD and I wish I had understood it earlier to get ahead of it, but it's okay.  Hil at the time told me that she may have great grades and a good job, etc., but that she can't walk into a room and command attention or just become friends with everyone, and that skills come in all shapes and sizes and one isn't better than another.  I'M GETTING EMOTIONAL AGAIN.  Remember when my blogs used to be carefree and funny?  Me either.
After that, Lizzy and I walked all through the grounds of the Prague Castle and wound our way down the hill to the Charles Bridge, and stopped for another drink.  Then we got into a whole discussion about relationships and sexuality.  Later, when we were hanging out with her husband, Rob, I found myself saying over and over: "It's like what Lizzy and I were talking about earlier..." and he was like "how did you guys somehow talk about EVERYTHING today?!"  Females, man.  Eventually she went back to her place to shower and I checked into my Airbnb across the street.  Got SO EXHAUSTED and almost fell dead asleep while waiting for her before dinner, but rallied, and so glad I did.  We took the tram up the hill to a nice restaurant for dinner, then went to an Irish pub to watch the Liverpool/Barcelona game.  No one there remembered the epic call from 2010 World Cup that Ned and I quote all the time, but hey, we do and that's what counts. ("AND YOU COULD NOT WRITE... A STORY LIKE THIS.")  We got there at halftime and were ordering drinks at the bar when a guy sitting at the bar was a real dick and says to me and Lizzy, "just so you know, when the game's on again, you've gotta move.  I sat here on purpose for a good view, so make sure you move." Then turned to his partner and we could clearly hear him saying things like, "Fuckin' ridiculous they're standing right there during the game... I'm not going to let that happen... no fuckin' way" Um, a) it's half time. b) it's a bar and we're at the bar ordering drinks. c) WE KNOW. d) fuck off.  He kept talking about us after we moved and she and I briefly thought about starting shit but you know, foreign country and all that.  Luckily he was cheering for Liverpool and they got stomped in the second half to lose the game and we rejoiced. :)
Went to a weird, dark "Books" bar after that and we were almost the only people there.  There were condoms in the bathroom and I took one as a joke to show Rob and Lizzy, but now it's still in my bag and freaks me out every time I reach for my Chapstick.  We went back to their house afterwards and I kid you not, just watched Harry Styles videos.  Turns out they both love him, especially Rob, which is so rich to me.  He was like "this guy is just like coolness personified and he's so talented and he's weirdly attractive in kind of a feminine way but also masculine and he has such a nice voice and swagger...." you'd think I planted Rob to say this to me, but no.  We watched the entirety of his Carpool Karaoke as I told them all of my favorite parts ("I was back middle." "Why am I always Julia Roberts??" "I cry in like, a cool way.")  It's like when someone says to me, "you know, I'd love to know more about the meanings behind Taylor Swift's songs but I never learned, what are all of the albums about?" And I look around expecting that I'm being Punk'd.  Parted ways with them and thanked them for everything and told them I was very grateful for our summer camp relationship.  You know, the kind that is intensely strong, and very brief.  I may never see them again and yet we spent 15 hours straight together on Wednesday and I had one of the best days ever.  See you in another life, brotha.
A series of hiccups led to a very stressful morning on Thursday that I won't fully get into because my poor family already lived through it with me via WhatsApp... but it started with extreme random nausea, (the kind you have a serious internal talk with yourself about: "no.  you are okay.  take deep, slow breaths.  do not throw up here.  you are completely fine, this will pass.  breathe.  you're not sick.  this is just random.  you cannot throw up here.") and then I got on what was supposed to be a train from Prague to Nuremberg with a stop in Schwandorf, but there was a service interruption on the first leg and everyone knew but me.  Probably because everyone speaks Czech and I, ya know, do not.  BTW so far Czech is the least intuitive language I've ever come across.  I could read an entire book in it and wouldn't be able to give you even the slightest context, like you can with French/Spanish/German.  I know, romance languages and all that, but man I really underestimated how important it is to know some of the language when you're traveling through remote towns.  I notice everyone in Plzen has gotten off the train and I think "well that's weird, but maybe they're all local commuters."  A lady comes by and yells at me to get off, I say, "English?" She says, "NO.  Bus." and shoos me off.  In the panic I forget my suitcase from where I stored it - thank the heavens above, it was still there when I realized 15 minutes later and fought my way back on a closed train.  I have such PTSD today and can't fathom what would have happened if the train had left.  Imagine my suitcase just taking off on a train to the Czech countryside by itself.  Zero percent chance I get that back.  Work computer, my treasured leather jacket from Kathy that I swear I'd save in a fire, all of my toiletries and pills and prescriptions...ugh I can't even think about it.
No one spoke English except for a kind man at the info desk who spoke very little, and gave me directions ("directions" is a loose term here, I did a lot of critical thinking and problem solving to vaguely understand what I was supposed to be doing next) to take a bus in an hour that would take me to Stod, where I could then catch my train to Schwandorf and hopefully ultimately Nuremberg.  After a series of mishaps and incredible uncertainty, eventually all of that happened.  I walked into the hotel in Nuremberg and almost kissed the floor.  I had big plans to wake up early and explore, but alas, I'm embarrassed to admit that all I did in Nuremberg was buy some wine/chocolate/gummy bears and stay in all night and sleep late this morning.  Bodies need rest, y'all.  My audiobook author would tell me that my body is in recovery mode after releasing an unnatural amount of adrenaline and cortisol.  NEVERTHELESS SHE PERSISTED!
I'll be staying with rig friend Angie and her family in Paris, and seeing rig Aaron there too.  He messaged me yesterday and said, "so do you want to see museums and such? Or I can show you my favorite brasseries?" I said, "I've been to Paris, I'd just like to day drink honestly."  Luckily he is on board, shawoooooooo.  Oddly there's no WiFi on this train like they said there would be, but it's not that bad because it's so smooth and comfortable and I still have my audiobook.  Will post this blog sometime later when the WiFi shows up.  Cross your fingers that I get the romantic countryside train ride I pined for.  And happy weekend!!!
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