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darkphoenix07 · 11 months

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i suffer from panic disorder and usually nothing can calm me down i just have to work through the panic attacks and breathing tricks don’t help. the only thing that’s ever worked is when i was in the middle of one and someone grabbed my face and put our foreheads together and kept saying “i’m here i’m not letting you go and i see you” and had me repeat things like “i’m safe i’m with you”. so i’m thinking say you’re at an ateez concert backstage bc you’re dating a member and for some reason at one point you get overwhelmed and start having an attack. you know the boys will be coming off of stage soon for a quick break so you start walking away so you can panic away from everyone but your boyfriend notices and refuses to get back on stage until he’s helped you thru the attack (like i mentioned above). i’ve been having yunho brainrot recently but also with mingi’s own struggles with anxiety i can see him in this scenario too. one of them would be great!

Yunho prioritizing your mental health over his concert

Mental health request

Masterlist

Paring : Yunho x Reader

Genre : Sweet, Angst, Anxiety attack, Panic disorder

Music : Shout out by Enhypen x Taylor Swift Blank space

7:32 p.m.

The boys have just finished their practice and everyone is getting fresh one by one for getting their makeup done. You are sitting with San as he is talking nonsense about his cat. But your eyes on the way Yunho is going to enter. It has been one year since you guys started dating and your life has become heaven from then.

Yunho is the boy you always thought he was seeing him on screen but other than that, he is so protective and cautious about your needs. He notices the little things you do, he is also good at remembering dates, he is good at calming you down whenever you need to. Even the boys have accepted you like you are their family member and that's why you are always with them in the backstage whenever you can when their concert occurs.

You hype them up on stage and off. Everyone knows about your relationship with him, without the fans. You haven't revealed it officially yet as it can effect on his career. He insisted but didn't because Korean fans can get kinda toxic regarding idol relationship.

"There you are," you look at him all dressed in white, hair still wet and a broad smile beaming on his face.

"San, will you leave my girlfriend alone for God's sake? Wherever I'm not around, you are around her like a lost puppy," he says taking your hand, pulling you towards him and your forehead hit his chest.

"Calm down, big man. Not everyone wants to take your girlfriend away. I was having a cat talk with your girlfriend who happens to be my friend too," he says.

"Whatever, piss off," he says and San leaves rolling his eyes.

He kisses your forehead and stares at you, "If I didn't have to dance now, I would do forbidden things with you right now."

"Seriously? You have a concert to attend and you are talking about sex?" You hit his chest playfully and his smile gets bigger, "I'll miss you."

"I'll be some feet away," You tell him and hug him but the hug doesn't last longer as he gets a call from manager for doing his makeup.

After he leaves, you sit there alone. You are not allowed in the makeup room as Yunho gets distracted a lot. You think of roaming around for a while and have some chips.

As you walk around the corridor, you hear some girl talking about you, "I don't understand how Yunho is so obsessed with her. She isn't even that pretty let alone rich."

Another male voice says, "Even I wouldn't fuck her but Yunho seems like he wants to gift her stars. That's too shitty."

They are the staff, you don't see their face neither recognize them but their small talk was enough to make your heart heavy.

You've always thought about what have you done to have someone like Yunho in your life. He is an international star where you are just a normal college girl. Nowhere you deserved him because you are not as pretty as the girls who would give their life to become his.

But he chose you, wanted you, cared for you. Why? You don't even deserve it, you are not even a good person. You were awful to your friends and family, they all dislike you for your smart mouth as they said. You always talked a lot and they were all shit.

But Yunho always loved how clumsy and talkative you were. How lost you were always in your own world and that's how he became a part of it too.

But your hands start trembling at the thought that you are a burden, a distraction for Yunho. No one is going to accept you as his girlfriend because you are no match compared to him. You are nothing and he is everything. Every staff, every fan, every person he knows and doesn't know love him. On the other hand, people hate you, never loved you as much as he did. Then? How did you become someone worthy of love by him?

You feel so overwhelmed that your mind starts getting filled with toxic conversation of how undeserving you are of love, care and warmth. How you shouldn't live and how you are not good for Yunho. He is going to get rid off you too because you are too much to tolerate. Your head become a mess with thoughts colliding with each other.

You tried breathing, thinking about something else but your heart aches and your knees feel weak. You hold on to a railing as you whimper trying not to cry out loud, you grab your stomach as it hurts too much. Breathing comes hard for you as your body sink on the floor.

There their opening time is up but Yunho wants to say goodbye to you and you haven't even hyped them yet. He asks everyone where you are and starts looking for you. They tell him to start the opening but his heart keeps telling you that you're in need of him. So he follows and finally finds your body curled around a railing of a corridor as you are having hiccups and aches around your body.

"Oh my God, darling," he sits in front of you and tries to make you face him but you keep looking down.

"No... don't "

"Please look at me."

"I... can't," you feel embarrassed and shameful because of the person you are. People will think you want attention, you are ruining his day.

But Yunho picks you up crossing your legs around his waist as you keep your chin inside the crook of his neck.

He keeps his hand on your back patting but you're still trembling as he keeps you on the couch of the resting room telling everyone to leave.

He cups your face wiping as much tears as he can, "You're safe with me. Look at me, it's me. Your Yunpup. Baby."

"Let me go please. Go join them. You're getting late," your words sound so hoarse as they come out barely.

"I'm here, I'm not letting you go. I see you. You are not alright. Please calm down. My heart is aching seeing you like this," he says kissing the tip of your nose.

You look at him seeing his make-up getting smudged on the side you were crying when he picked you up.

"Fuck, I ruined your makeup. I keep ruining everything. I'll ruin your career too. Let me go, please. I-"

"Shhh, you are not going anyway just like I said. You are not ruining anything, Y/n. You are the love of my life and I have vowed to myself to protect you forever. Leaving you here like this, how do you I'm going to dance?"

"But your co-"

"They can wait. I've told them I'll be late for half an hour. So hold my hand and looks at me," he says and you do.

"Say it. That you're safe and you're with me," he says.

"I'm safe. I'm with you."

"Inhale for a long moment. Hold it for 4 3 2 1, now exhale. Yes, that's my girl. See, you are good at that," he says ruffling your hair as you feel calmed down.

He did it again and you are feeling relaxed, "Listen to me."

"Hm."

"Leaving you will be like burning my soul, tearing a limb from my own body. So, don't even think about it. I love you sweetheart and I'm always going to love you like there is no tomorrow. Do you understand me?"

You nod when another roll of emotion washes over you making you cry.

"Promise me one thing."

"Yes?"

"Whenever you feel like this, come running to me wherever I am. Don't you dare break this promise, okay?"

You nod again and he pecks you, "I love you the most and I'm not letting it go for anything else. You have made my life so much easier and happier than anything else. What will I do with reputation and wealth if my loml is not with me?" The way he is holding you in his arms right now, he is making you feel like you are a tiny baby.

You smile hearing him saying those as he pecks you again, "Get ready to stay up all night after I finish my concert. I'm dying to touch you."

"Shut up, pervert," you say standing up making him chuckle.

"You are my nicotine, baby girl," You stand there stunned as he gets ready and leaves for his performances.

As you stand in the crowd, you see him spotting you right away as he sends you a flying kiss mouthing, "Ready for tonight?" Washing over your panic, anxiety and insecurities.

I hope it helped you

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inneratinyrebel · 2 years

Text

First Date - Choi Jongho

What I think Jongho would be like on your first date and what I think the date would be like:

- Ok so we know Jongho loves his coffee, so not to sound cliché, but I do think he'd want to go and have coffee with you first

- He would want to truly get to know you, and your quirks before he started to take things with you seriously

- Jongho would not talk too much about his upcoming date with the guys, but they would talk to him about it

- Some would tease him (aka Wooyoung and San) while the others would give him advice

- Jongho would maybe mention it to Yeosang and Mingi and ask them for some pointers

- Jongho and you would decide to meet up at the cafe (which he picked out since he already knew it and liked it there)

- You guys would have planned to sit together for an hour or 2 and talk but end up being there the whole afternoon

- You spend so much time talking and laughing that you don´t even realize it´s closing time until you basically get kicked out

- Since you both aren´t ready to part ways, you decide to go to the park

- You sit together on a bench and continue talking, that is until Jongho's phone start ringing

- He apologizes and offers to walk you home, which you accept

- As you are walking home, it starts pouring rain of course neither of you was prepared for that

- At your home, you ask Jongho to come in and offer him some dry clothes (thank god for owning baggy clothes or men's clothes, and yes I do wear men clothes sometimes and I love it)

- As it keeps raining you eventually offer for Jongho to stay over and this is the first time you see him get flustered so you quickly offer to stay on the couch

- Of course being the gentleman he is, he says he'll take the couch and stay since A) he doesn't want to disturb his manager so late and B) He would never let you sleep on the couch

- The two of you end up both sleeping on the couch all cuddled up since the storm cut off the power and you were genuinely too afraid to go be on your own with such a heavy storm

- Jongho is a sweetheart of course and sings you to sleep to get your mind off of the storm and falls asleep with you

Bonus:

-The boys will tease him for weeks to come after he gets home the next morning wearing not his own clothes

I’m back! I have been doing much better and I am so glad to finally have finished the first date series!! Thank you for the love you have showed me!!

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