#bc yeah most of us have no choice but to buy fast fashion bc its all we can afford

[yonpote]

actually i AM gonna talk abt dan's fashion expenses outside of tags fuck it and im gonna be 100% forreal about this and idc if the bants about his $300 pants are mostly jokes

yall know about what happens with fast fashion right. it's all cheaply made by people trapped in sweatshops and factories all day for little to no pay, and when a fashion cycle or season is over, all of the unsold clothes get dumped onto the shores of a country that has been cast as lesser by societies that continue to benefit from colonization and slavery despite acting like we're somehow above it. and of course thats not even accounting for clothes that end up in trash landfills, just all this fuckin waste that goes into letting a t shirt be $15USD.

and like okay. no, dan buying $300 parachute pants isn't singlehandedly saving the world, and no, phil buying $10 graphic tees isn't singlehandedly killing it. but still it bugs me AND I KNOW ITS A JOKE HAHA SO FUNNY BUT LIKE IT BUGS MEEEE when ppl are like "xD dan howell participating in capitalism by buying expensive clothes" when its like, ok he's buying from brands that nobody's heard of, who probably make clothes by order, and tbf i'm not 100% confident that the working conditions of the people who made dan's $300 pants are all super safe and sound and all of the workers are well-paid, but they're at the very least being paid. being paid more than a USD cent. and you're probably not going to see thousands of parachute pants piling up on a madagascan beach.

[asingleheart-shapedbraincell]

Obey Me Brothers and Misc. react to MC having their coffee order memorised

GN!MC

Prologue

You go to a coffee shop. Human world or devildom, doesn't matter. All that matters is after waiting in line you order for you and Ya Boi bc you have their order memorised and they get flustered because every single one of them is a ✨massive softie✨

This is also just me headcanoning their drink orders while I take a break from my dissertation.

(I'm referring to the undateables as Misc. because I don't want to call the the datables bc Luke is a child. He is not datable. That is my son.)

Lucifer

This man would take his coffee in an IV if he could and you can't convince me otherwise

Probably asks that they put as many extra espresso shots in the drink as they're legally allowed to

Anyway, he's very touched that you have his order memorised. He has yours memorised to.

Appreciates that you pay enough attention to him to know his order

Low-key blushing about it and will think about it next time he makes himself coffee

Might even end up making you one to if he isn't working late

Definitely goes for coffee with you more often (definitely not to spend more time with you and also to show that he has your order memorised too 👀)

Mammon

This man is destroyed by any kind of casual affection (pls hold his hand)

I mean, of course you know the great Mammon's coffee order! You were his human weren't ya?

If you're ordering for him, that means you're paying, right? 👀

He do be blushing tho (if you also pay he'll blush even more)

And since you bought it, I GUESS you can have a sip...definitely doesn't just want the casual and domestic intimacy of sharing the same cup

Wants to get coffee with you more often (so he can drink from your cup)

Levi

How did you know the code to order the Ruri-Chan Loveheart Surprise Latte off of the secret menu??????

Oh, you knew it because you listened to him order before and memorised it????????????

Hes not crying, you're crying

No but really, the proof that you actively listen to him when he's talking about his interests has his heart skipping a beat

Hes bright red and trying to cover his face with his hands

Wants to get two straws so you two can sit opposite each other and share a drink but is WAY to shy to ask 🥺👉👈

Will end up buying matching reusable coffee cups that have 'player one' and 'player two' on them

Satan

For the most part he’ll order something basic like an Americano or a flat white UNLESS you're at a place that does latte art.

Then he ALWAYS gets cat themed latte art

Like the little 3D ones they make out of foam and then draw little faces on???

Yeah, he loves them

He think they're so cute

They're in most of his devilgram pics next to whatever book he was reading at the time

One of his favourite things to do is visit cat cafe with you and if you remember his order he'll be very touched and he'll thank you with a blush and a smile

Has your order memorised as well and orders for you next time

Asmo

Changes with whats fashionable but anything ✨pink✨

Pink drink, peach lemonade, strawberry and white chocolate mocha they're all acceptable

But is delighted when you remember his order- it means you've been paying attention to the trends he's following!!!!!

Did you see the drink on his devilgram story????? Isn't it cute!!!!!! You should get one to match and take a selfie together!!!!

Thinks its really cute to go on coffee dates and hear you order for him

Like, yes, they know my order 😌 we're that close 😙✌

Beel

Just hand him a basic Americano, but in a Big Gulp cup

Is touched that you remembered his order, even if it is simple. He just kinda blushes and thanks you (maybe asks if you want to go out dinner that evening).

Make sure he’s fed, or has food available bc if you don’t he will eat ✨The Beans✨

He has done this before and you DO NOT want to see Beel when he has enough caffiene in his system to give a mortal cardiac arrest

He’s already the most athletic brother. You won’t catch him. No one will.

You know Taz from Looney Tunes? When he just...spins super fast in circles and eats stuff??? Yeah, Beel’s like that.

But if he doesn’t eat straight-up coffee beans, he’s just as chill as normal

Just enjoys spending some quality time with you (and yes, he will definitely have your order memorised too)

Belphie

Must!!!!!keep!!!!this!!!!!boy!!!!!awake!!!!!!!

If you remember his order he’s gonna blush, but do his best not to react. But he may also feel the need to Hold Hands later in the day because you’ll have him feeling ✨soft✨.

Has a black coffee but puts, like, 5 sugars in it

He’s basically drinking espresso syrup

and it does NOTHING

Caffiene does not affect this man AT. ALL.

It’s almost scary - he can down 3 espressos and then nap for five hours afterwards

Doesn’t love going on coffee dates because if you’re too caffinated he has trouble keeping up with you, and you won’t feel like having a nap with him. But if you’re just having one coffee, or a tea or something, he does like how chilled out the date can be.

Diavolo

I get grande iced machiatto vibes, and I can’t tell you why

Loves that you remember his order and isn’t shy about it. Will blush at first and then break into a massive beaming smile

He’s paying for the coffee (he’s literally royalty, he’s paying for the damn coffee)

Makes him feel like you two are close and he may attempt to hold hands later if the vibe is right.

Constantly asks you out on coffee dates afterwards - loves spending time with you and loves how informal and relaxed it is

Will also remember your order and make sure that Barb knows how to make it for when you visit the Palace

But still prefers the actual act of going out to a coffee shop with you

If you bring him his coffee order when he’s working, however👀👀👀...blushing mess.

The fact that you went to get coffee for him...even though he knows that you know that Barb is perfectly capable of making him coffee...that you got coffee and thought of him...and bought a coffee for him...and brought it to him...the casual affection, the softness, the thoughtfulness. 😳😳😳 he’s destroyed. BLUSHING. He’s literally so touched. Gonna commit hand holding crimes. Will think about it all day. Will miss you 3x more than normal just because. May even end up doing some light ~pining~ 🥺🥺🥺

Barbatos

✨Tea✨

This is the Undisputed King of Tea

He knows every blend of tea that the shop offers and has the menu memorised.

Will also tell you about the different tea blends if you ask, describes how they taste, what they’re ingredients are, where they’re from, etc.

He’s very grateful if you remember his order, but if you then bring up some of the trivia he’s shared about that tea?? Blushing.

Very touched that you not only remembered his order but the things about it that interest him. The fact that you clearly paid attention when he was talking about tea.

Thinks of you as a very considerate person and will offer to share

He’ll also invite you over for tea a the palace more often now that you’ve shown an interest in Tea Trivia (even if that interest is only based in your interest in him)

Will also invite you to come with him when he needs to go to the market to restock the Palaces tea supplies and may even...h...hold ur hand...😳😳😳

Simeon

This is a chai latte man, don't come for me

Will test out how it tastes with different syrups, particularly likes either hazelnut or vanilla

Can also do his own latte art

When you order for him??? And have his order memorised????? He's delighted.

Its not uncommon for angels to remember each others orders, but he's touched nonetheless (yes that does mean he has your order memorised)

Will tell you that he's touched by your consideration

Just gives him the warm fuzzies and it also kinda reminds him of home

Offers to do latte art in your drink if he can

Would also be the kind of person to bring you coffee in class, and he'll do latte art on that so you can take off the lid and see a little foamy heart and the like ❤☕

Luke (platonic)

No coffee!!!! He's a child!!!!!!

You order him a puppychino hot chocolate

With whipped cream and cinnamon which is his preferred topping and a slice of cake

Hes definitely super happy about the fact you remembered how he likes his hot chocolate

Tells you that your so nice and should come back to the celestial realm with Simeon and him instead of staying down here with a bunch of no-good demons who don't deserve you 😤

Plus the celestial realm has the best hot chocolate!

You also let him have SMALL sips of your coffee but ONLY so he can scope out which beans to use in his next coffee and walnut cake!!!!!!!

Solomon

Probably has some awful sounding custom drink like a fruit tea with pumpkin spice syrup and milk in it 😣

Or a peach lemonade with a shot of espresso and marshmallows 🤢

So its super unique, but he's still surprised you remembers the specifics

Offers to let you try it

DON’T

Will take you out to get coffee together more often, partly to spend time with you and partly to horrify you with his drink choices