#be it leftover fondness from pre july or just

[qualityrain]

legato and elendira r so funny to me because every time theyre tgt in the same room elendiras like ohhhh im going to kill you i can do it! dont test me! and legato just takes it (unless its abt knives and loyalty then legato becomes so cringe elendira just concedes to preserve her braincells) but when it comes down to it she actually doesnt know what to do with him lmao. the way he busts out of the coffin and shes like fUCK i shouldnt have made him my enemy hes so much more powerful while legatos here having his flashback before death and its focused on knives but elendira is also there and the whole crimson nail has fallen its ok ill be there with you soon also the way elendira is not part of the death game too (nightow probably couldve added elendira later on in the story and thats why she wasnt included but shhhhh) like enemy where. also the way elendira says all this and yet went out of her way to be there to pass the coins when nobody asked. like can you guys show affection normally. not a single normal person close to knives.

[jonwongton]

KCON NY 2019 Recap

Wow I was actually in New York for four days and four nights. When I first saw the fromis_9 KCON NY announcement I knew there was no way I wasn't going to go. It looks like they made some great memories in NY/LA and I wanted a part of the fun too. Plus I wanted to avoid some of the regret I had last year in that I didn't go to KCON LA 2018. I already got super invested in them through June/July but I don't think I was emotionally ready/mature enough to go on a solo trip like this by myself.

Friday, July 5th

So to start out my trip, my flight to Newark was delayed for four hours. At least at the airport, I met the most beautiful family and got to play with their kids for a couple hours. The kids went boy girl boy where the youngest boy was causing trouble (literally me since I’m the third child), and the girl had no concept of stranger danger so she told me a wide assortment of TMIs about her family. The lady sitting next to me (Annie!) on the flight was also the sweetest soul imaginable, so we chatted for a couple hours before both watching Crazy Rich Asians (I admittedly cried at the ending).

I arrived after 9pm (no chance for early check-in or Klub KCON though I didn't want to dance with 16 year olds anyways), and I get anxious af when I'm in a foreign place without knowing exactly where I'm going, so I mass googled/kept asking for strangers for help to get to Manhattan. After I got settled into my hotel, Maya met me outside we went to Times Square! I'm so glad she came out and saw me that night because 1) I haven't seen her since summer of maybe 2016? so I missed her a ton 2) I literally had no idea how the NY subway worked before she told me 3) I wanted to go Times Square at night and 4) I wouldn't have wanted to go alone. We caught up on literally everything and I went to bed pretty late considering I wanted to check-in early to sell my A1 artist engagement pack.

and our “first date” pose because we were standing so damn far from each other:

Saturday, July 6th

I got up at 6am EDT (so 3am PDT aka rip), and rushed over to the Javits Convention Center to get in line. I brought like literally nothing because I was afraid you couldn't bring food in or they'd throw away my hydroflask. As it turns it, the staff didn't care at all, and there was hardly any line. After checking in, I got my A1 artist engagement pack ($150) which had an AB6IX high touch, a TXT audience pass, and an SF9 audience pass. 

I almost panicked because I didn't know how popular AB6IX was, and if I had gotten ATEEZ/TXT I literally would have made at least a $100 net profit. I sat in line with some new people before I summoned enough courage to go into the artist engagement mob. Almost immediately, a girl ran up to me and asked me if I wanted to sell my hi-touch. I wanted to gauge the "market price" a bit more because I was still early af, but since I was still kinda panicking, I sold it to her for $100 and her SF9 audience pass. I looked around and that's when I figured out all the girls were trying to trade their hi-touches for the groups they wanted and all the guys were trying to buy their IZ ONE/(G)-IDLE hi-touches (the only two girl groups doing an artist engagement since Everglow couldn't attend and fromis_9 wasn't doing one). For the eight groups there, I'm pretty sure the market price went something alone the lines of

ATEEZ >>>>>>>> TXT = IZ ONE >> (G)-IDLE = The Boyz >>> SF9 = AB6IX >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> VeriVery

where the ">" shows the relative difference between each group. I thought TXT would be up with ATEEZ but I was clearly wrong. That's why I was pretty happy to get the AB6IX hi-touch off my hands. VeriVery hi-touches were being sold for $20 and people were throwing away their audience passes. I heard someone bought an ATEEZ hi-touch for $550 lmao.

I sold my AB6IX hi-touch, sat back in line with my new friends, and traded my TXT audience pass for an ATEEZ audience pass based on my sense of how popular each group was. I made another lap around the mob and a girl bought my ATEEZ audience pass almost instantly for $40. I made another lap maybe ten minutes later and sold one of my SF9 audience passes for $30 (I'm pretty sure I ripped her off on this one really hard but oh well). I couldn't find a buyer for my other SF9 audience pass so I decided to hold onto it until tomorrow since that's when their artist engagement would be. At this point, I was already +$20 in profit and I still had an audience pass leftover.

All the trading chaos settled at around 8:45am, but the convention didn't start until 11am. I just talked with some 16/17 year olds that were ridiculously into ATEEZ and other boy groups (surprisingly not NUEST or Seventeen).

I was one of the first into the convention and I made a full lap to scout around before picking something to do. The Toyota booth snatched me first and when I told them I was legit gonna get a 2020 Camry they were !!! and made me play their game. You had to search the Corolla for four QR codes, and take selfies with the filter that's prompted after scanning it in 90 seconds. The iPad they gave me glitched the fuck out so I only got three done. They gave me a "The Boyz Meet and Greet" pass which would allow me to go to the front of the line when they made a "surprise visit" at the Toyota booth. I was being a nice guy and told some The Boyz fan about it nearby, so the girl did it, succeeded, and won a fucking IZ ONE hi-touch >.> (people were selling that for $150 minimum...) so yes I'm salty as hell.

At the official merchandise line, if you bought more than $100 of stuff, they'd give you a special merchandise voucher. If you took that voucher to the KCON Star Square, played the game they had every hour and won, you'd get a chance to meet a "surprise artist". There were some official fromis_9 slogan towels for sale for $25, but I decided not to buy it right then and there in case they wanted one big purchase totaling $100. But my dumbass was wrong and the slogan towels sold out 30 minutes later and to this day I still don't have one (they're beautiful). I was also too slow to pre-order it when I bought my convention pass because they closed the presale.

I did some social media sellout booths, wrote some fromis_9 support on the "message to your idols" board, and realized there was nothing to do after that.

I just stood at the Toyota booth where they'd play an entire song and anyone that knew the dance would go up and do it (note they played the ENTIRE song and not just the chorus so for songs that weren't super popular, the stage was empty for a solid two minutes each time). I was only there for maybe 20 minutes, but they played Love Bomb and to my surprise, 4 Walls (which I haven't heard in ages).

I walked around aimlessly for another hour before I realized I hadn't eaten anything for the whole day. I got some really overpriced convention food and sat with some girls I met in line because I was pretty lonely at that point. They were from Chicago and were also there just for ATEEZ. We talked for a bit before they went to line up at MSG for the concert, so I walked around aimlessly for another 45 minutes before I went to one of the panels.

The panel was "The difference between American and KPOP" and Andreas Oberg (wrote Young and Free by Xiumin and Mark, one of my favorite station tracks) and David Amber (wrote Love Bomb, Heart Shaker, Yes or Yes, and Love Bug) were there! The third guy on the panel was pretty annoying, but I'm super interested in how these guys come up with these songs and they shed a ton of insight about it. 

They talked about how most successful kpop songs now are actually a combination of multiple melodies put together, which supposedly make the song more interesting. For their particular styles, they try not to repeat the melody between choruses because that would bore the listener and try to have super catchy parts of the song or even the chorus start the track. Something else I found out which was super interesting is how they tailored certain songs for certain companies and groups. Andreas said SM gave him a ton of freedom, but when JYP asked for a song from David, he needed to make the verses long enough for each member to sing (aka Twice needs more lines since there are nine members) and add in rapping parts if the group had a rapper. They had a Q&A section at the end where two people kinda pissed me off since they went up to the mic and made shameless plugs saying how much they adored Andreas/David and were aspiring song writers like them. I actually summoned the courage myself and asked the panel a few questions:

Do you have a good sense of whether a song you wrote will become super popular?

How do you feel about songs that you are very proud of writing that don't become popular, maybe because it was given to a group that isn't that popular?

Do you think composers deserve more credit for making groups popular? The example I used is Blackpink is SUPER popular but their entire soud is almost exclusively produced by Teddy, which almost no one knows about.

I thought they gave me really insightful responses too:

A little bit, but once the song is produced, it's in the hands of the company to promote it with the artist and the choreography.

They're sometimes really sad about songs they create that don't make it big, and Andreas told me he was very fond of Young & Free

David said it's fine the way it is now. The example he used is with movies where the actors/actresses will get all the credit + make the movie famous, but a huge part of the production of the movie is because of the director, who rarely gets any attention.

I walked around aimlessly for another thirty minutes before standing at the KCON Dance Studio to watch the random play dance. I always saw the youtube videos of them so I wanted to see it in person myself. It turns out there was a cluster fuck of people there and we kept getting pushed back so far I couldn't see anything. Two guys in line next to me had Fun Factory albums and fromis_9 posters, so I decided to strike up a conversation with them. It turns out they were also huge flovers AND buddies, so we ditched the random play dance and talked for half an hour about our overall love for kpop. They were also New York locals, and they said they would take me under their wing for the rest of the weekend T_T. We met up with one of the guy's aunts and head to ktown since it was within walking distance, the convention closed at 6, and they wanted something to eat before the concert started at 8.

I took the 순두부 짬뽕 I ordered back to my hotel and ate it while watching the live stream since I only bought a Sunday ticket. On the way back, I also stopped by a store called Koryo Bookstore which sold kpop stuff. I couldn't find any GFriend/fromis_9 stuff I wanted, so I bought a Harry potter book in Korean to practice before going back. The concert livestream was okay, and it felt even shorter because IZ ONE got an extra stage, which I presume was supposed to fill in for Everglow. I lost my shit when NUEST performed Love Paint and Look though because those songs changed my life summer 2016 (they almost made me wish I went). I was still kinda disappointed in them because they had a ton of fans, but they gave off the vibe they only came to NY just to do the concert and leave. I tried sleeping early but as I crawled into bed, I got a fromis_9 vlive notification and I kinda had to watch it in case they spoiled the activities of tomorrow. I saw on twitter they actually arrived on SATURDAY and just toured New York, so obviously there was no way they could be at Saturday's convention. I spammed in chat if they'd have a pinky promise event for maybe 15 minutes but they never saw the comment. I didn't hear any spoilers so I just went to bed tired af since I got like no sleep in the past two days.

Sunday, July 7th

I woke up pretty late on Sunday and bought an expensive ass fancy bagel before getting to the convention center, though I could hardly eat it since I have literally zero appetite when I’m in a foreign place.

I bought the official fromis_9 jersey to match my two buddies just so everyone would know we were flovers at first sight. I also finally took out my Saerom sign and carried it around the convention center. We watched the Sunday opening ceremony and met up with a third guy (a Wiz One) while we waited for the fromis_9 fanclub meeting at 1:30.

I also found a lady willing to buy my SF9 audience pass for $15, which is ridiculous because I saw people giving it away for free at this point.

The fanclub meeting was really interesting. I instantly locked eyes with a girl that had a Saerom sign and we took a few pictures.

We played bingo with a lot of the squares consisting of fromis_9 memes, and two kahoot games where we had to guess which member it was (the pictures were ridiculous) and name the song after only hearing 1 second of it. At the very end, we did the Love Bomb and Fun! fanchants, but it was nearly impossible doing them without already knowing them if you could read romanized hanguel fast enough. I still screamed my heart out though (seriously).

There was nothing interesting left on the schedule, so we walked around before deciding to go to the (G)-IDLE fanclub meeting as well. I missed most of it because I met up with the girl that printed the banners, but there was a really entertaining random play dance at the end. On the way to get the banners, I met the girl that had the Saerom sign during the fromis_9 fan meeting, so we chatted a bit and exchanged numbers (she was here just for fromis_9 and she came from SWEDEN, so I thought we could bond over that). We closed out the day by going to the "2019 Year of Girl Groups" panel. 

The panel was really boring, one of the members kept swearing, and they just talked about which girl groups they thought were the most influential in the kpop scene. Personally, I thought the SNSD/f(x) answers were meaningful since Gee shook the world and f(x)'s weird sound + Amber broke down a lot of stereotypes at the time, but some of the Twice answers in the group were a huge stretch. Two fans kept talking about how much Twice meant to them and while that's great and all, I think the rest of the audience felt the same way as I did. At the end, they forgot to give away their prizes, so they basically asked us to walk up and convince the audience why we should get the prize. I walked up and told them I was disappointed I came all the way from California just to see fromis_9 but still didn’t get the chance to. That won me this:

It was like 5:30pm after the panel ended, so we (five of us total) went to ktown to get chicken and hype ourselves up for the concert. They were playing Chung Ha and so many other not as popular girl groups (Weki Meki, Gugudan, Cherry Bullet) that we ended up talking about that for the entire time.

We all split up after we got to Madison Square Garden (I had P1, the group of three had P2, one guy had P3) and had maybe five minutes before the concert started because we showed up so late. 

We were all super sad that they started with fromis_9 instead of one of the other boy groups, but I fanchanted and danced my heart out during all the songs.

The people in my section were huge mood killers though. I was sitting in the Chase preferred section, so I feel like the people in that section either a) had their parents use their credit card to buy their tickets or b) got the tickets handed out at some event and weren't even invested in kpop. The two girls to my life were there for seventeen and got on their feet at the end, but the two girls to the right of me sat down and were on their phones for the whole concert.

I got so lucky during the concert. VeriVery covered 24K magic, AB6IX covered Attention, and SF9 covered Love Shot, all songs which I know and love. And a word about Seventeen's stage. I was clearly at KCON for fromis_9, but I also LOVE Seventeen. I didn't pay much attention to their most recent comeback home though since it was a much slower song. However, EVERY SEVENTEEN SONG THEY PERFORMED I ACTUALLY KNEW. They started with 숨이차 which I knew but was indifferent to, but then we got Good To Me, Adore U, AND 아주 Nice. The stadium was freaking shaking during 아주 Nice and when they came back for the surprise encore I think the entire crowd and I died.

I met up with my friends after outside the venue, but three of them had to leave because they had work the next day (locals). I was ready to go back to my hotel content with the concert but disappointed overall, but Sweden girl texted me and told me to meet up with all the other flovers we were with. I met the moderators of the fan club meeting and like ten people that were huge fans and traveled as far as I did here for fromis_9. None of us were tired so we went to ktown to hang out. We talked for two hours over girl groups, fromis_9, guessing each other's biases, and learning our own backstories + age. Like where were these people during the actual convention. Apparently they all knew each other, but because I don't have a twitter, instagram, or am on discord, I was the reason I couldn't be found. I invited Sweden girl to do touristy crap with me on Monday/Tuesday because our flights on Tuesday were at like the same time, but one of the guys there tipped us off for the fromis_9 flash mob happening tomorrow at Washington Square Park at 2:30pm. I personally didn't give a shit about touristy stuff and I only felt obligated to do it because I was in New York, but I clearly only came this far for kpop. We decided to meet up for lunch at like 11am and we all went our separate ways.

Monday, July 8th

We all met up at Chipotle and sat around talking about more kpop stuff.

It was raining surprisingly hard in the morning, so we were all praying the event didn't get canceled. We walked over to Washington Square Park at 1pm and camped out there full of anxiety. I’ll type up what happened at the flash mob in a different post, but in summary, it was the best day of our lives. A ton of flovers had flights to catch, so Sweden girl and got milk tea and just held our hands crying over the event we saw. We rewatched the videos like 15 times (not kidding), took the subway to the Statue of Liberty, took the subway BACK to Washington Square Park because we missed some closure pictures, and then went to Central Park to take more pictures, all while lugging around my silly Saerom sign.

Our heads were in the clouds the entire day so we just sat on a rock and watched the sunset. She met up with a friend from Michigan while I got Halal guys and went back to my hotel room super emotional over the days events.

My dumbass put too much of the red sauce in it which was spicy as HELL so I couldn’t even eat much of it.

Tuesday, July 9th

I woke up late because I wanted to stretch out the best day of my life (yesterday) for as long as possible, and Sweden girl convinced me to go to the airport to say bye to fromis_9 before our flight. I was late as hell, but I booked my ass over to JFK and got to see (G)-IDLE and IZ ONE at the airport (I have videos, not pictures). At the end of the day, fromis_9 wasn't even leaving New York that day so apparently the twitter source was wrong. I wasn't too disappointed though given Monday's events, so I said my good-byes to my partner-in-crime from the weekend and booked my ass to Newark (I was almost late for my flight because New York rush hour, will never underestimate again).

---

All in all, I give KCON a solid 3/10, but my overall trip was a 12.4/10 because of what happened at Washington Square Park. KCON has much better, ethical ways to suck the money dry out of the fans that are willing to pay. They announce the artist engagement schedule AFTER selling the packs, which baited so many Nuest and Seventeen fans. The layout of the convention was absolutely fucking awful too. They put the Toyota booth dance stage, the KCON stage, the cover stage, and the KCON dance stage fairly close to each other so the music was playing over each other, and the other half of the room had empty booths full of cosmetic products and studying in Korea which has an appeal to like 10% of the people there. They also checked our wristbands when moving between rooms in the convention center, which makes no sense since we needed our wristband to enter the Javits Convention Center period. And in general, there was nothing to do "long term" so so many people were walking around bored like me. The lines for the stuff that could actually be done were ridiculously long (maybe 25-30 minute waits for the free food but that's long enough to miss an entire panel/engagement). The cherry on the cake is they announced the KCON LA lineup today without any teasers (no consistency?) and almost every single artist that went to KCON NY is going to KCON LA. I personally trust KCON LA a bit more to not fuck up everything as bad as KCON NY, but it still feels pretty unethical considering how many of us flew ridiculous distances to NY just for the same line up.

I'm not the biggest fan of New York either. The city is super crowded, smells awful, and I don't feel safe on the streets at all (and I'm a guy). One redeeming quality is that the people that I met were unbelievably nice. I probably asked for directions eight times and every time, I got the most helpful/friendly response. An old white man even saw how I confused I looked an approached me asking exactly how he could help me get to where I wanted to go.

At least now, I think I have the confidence to plan my own solo trip to a faraway place. This was a fun one.

I hope we answered your promise Saerom!

[words-are-my-medium]

Post-S2 ST Headcanons

This started out as headcanons I was writing down and then it just got so out of hand it turned into a semi-fic? It’s long and probably not great writing I’m sorry but I wanted to keep track of it here for myself at least so here (please don’t take this as an example of my actual writing quality because I would format this so much better if it wasn’t just a heacanon dump)

El-centric, pre-Byler/Byeler, Byers-Hopper family feels and headcanons galore, (probably overuse of commas galore too), kind-of a fic?

-So El is like… super not into studying. I mean she had a dictionary in her house for almost a year and she didn’t know the word “compromise”; girl’s been watching TV all day and learning words slowly and not entirely accurately through context. After the Snow Ball Hopper starts cracking down–she needs to start school (high school no less) in the fall of ‘85 and she’s got a lot of catching up to do.

-She HATES it, and the Party quickly realizes this, so they try to study with her and help whenever possible. Unfortunately they don’t succeed much: whenever Mike’s over El never wants to study; Lucas gets too impatient with her; Dustin makes a valiant effort to introduce her to the joy of curiosity voyages but it doesn’t work. Max, after being unfairly given the cold shoulder for quite a while, finally becomes friends with El and then becomes a HUGE distraction; El’s only friend who’s a girl (even if she’s not into pretty things like playing with makeup), why study when you can have special girls only friend time?

-So the Party’s pretty stuck, when surprisingly Will steps up and like magic, El tries super hard to be attentive and they start making progress! Mike is pretty sure there is some kind of guilt on El’s part regarding Will that’s contributing, but hey, whatever works. Will is actually a pretty good tutor it turns out, he’s really patient and intuitive, observant to what seems to work and what doesn’t, if not particularly gifted at teaching, and while El will probably never be an amazing student, she starts getting the hang of the basic subjects. (Except math, which she is shockingly good at–Max is convinced that her brain is actually a calculator, but El explains that math was easy because it was so exact: no complicated answers, just right or wrong, not a lot of words to get in the way. She’d quietly admitted to Mike once with a wry smile that numbers just made sense to her.)

-Hopper takes Will out for his birthday because Lonnie sucks and the kid loves his mother obviously and hey, Hopper doesn’t care if he’s sensitive or different or something else, he’s Joyce’s boy and a good kid, but it wouldn’t hurt to spend some time with a positive male figure again after Bob. In early May Joyce and Hopper start… not quite dating but everyone knows it’s just a matter of time. Jonathan and Will have already discussed what it might be like having El for a sister someday. They’re not sure if/when that might become official, but to the brothers she’s already joined their family and they’re both happy. (Jonathan immediately had a fondness for El, she’d saved Will and her “papa” was super shitty too, and his protectiveness and compassion kicked in and he was able to start bonding with her pretty quickly, to his surprise.)

The weekend after the 4th of July they are all hanging out at the cabin, trying to cram in as much as possible as the fall and upcoming school year draw nearer. They’re eating leftover watermelon and Max is teaching them her patented seed-spitting technique, though Will is still helping El finish the part of the lesson they’re on and he loves that he can help, but he wants to kinda hang out too and El realizes this, of course.

El leans in to kiss him on the cheek and thank him because she genuinely appreciates his patience with her so much and she knows it’s taking time away from other stuff he could be doing to tutor her, he’s such a good friend and a sweet person and El is so happy having him in her life, in her family even, but at that exact moment Dustin nails Will in the side of the head with a watermelon seed and Will whips around to face his attacker, and El ends up planting it right on his mouth.

Everyone gasps and freezes and El breathes in sharply and tenses, but Will just kinda sits there wide-eyed for a minute before bursting out laughing. El’s face is a mix of fear and shame and she’s turning red, and everyone else is kind-of hesitantly looking at Mike. He isn’t sure how to react because yeah, his… girlfriend(?) just kissed his oldest friend but it was completely an accident, obviously not intended, and rather than being mad he’s kind of having a sudden anxious realization that wow, okay, that was not something he ever expected to see but uh, it wasn’t… wasn’t bad because El is pretty and Will is cute and he–um, okay yes he did just think Will is cute?! He’s having a violent bi awakening panic attack and omg why is Will laughing this is so awkward Mike’s turning into a tomato to match El why–

“Will, is… are you okay?” Dustin asks carefully, afraid he’s just set into motion a chain of events that made his friend go insane, because Will is practically rolling on the floor by now, and Will manages to stop just enough to gasp “I’m going to have to tell everyone who ever asks for the rest of my life that my first kiss was with my sister,” and Lucas spits his drink out all over Dustin and Max and then there’s an uproar of laughter and yelling and El is apologizing frantically and Will is wiping tears of laughter from his eyes and Mike is just standing there frozen and beet red and kind-of?? more than a little upset that El kinda just stole Will’s first kiss?!

-When everyone finally goes home Will and El stay (because Joyce and Hopper were out somewhere together so she’s picking him up when they get back), and they both kinda sit for a while comfortably in silence until Will knowingly asks if she’s okay and El admits she’s sad because Max explained that apparently first kisses are important and El’s sorry she ruined Will’s. Will assures her instantly she didn’t, it was an accident anyway and then goes quiet for a moment before “I’ll tell you a secret, El, don’t tell anyone else, but I don’t wanna kiss girls anyway, so it doesn’t count, it was only a technical first kiss, my official first kiss has to be with a boy so you didn’t ruin it at all.”

And El is so relieved because she never talks about it to anyone but she knows, knows everything bad that happened to Will is her fault, but now he’s her brother and her friend and she loves him and her new family and though she hates it, the truth is she wouldn’t take it all back, opening the gate, even if she somehow was able to, so she just has to try her hardest to make sure he’s happy and safe from now on.

-This is how Will Byers comes out (because confirming with Jonathan what Jonathan has always kinda known doesn’t count, he’s never had to hide who he is from Jonathan so it’s not “coming out”, he was never “in” when it comes to his brother). El is the perfect person because she doesn’t know how to hate, not for reasons like this; she accepts him immediately and that’s what he’s been so worried about, after everything Lonnie and the kids at school have ever said he’s been too scared to even tell his mother, let alone the boy he likes. And suddenly Will’s crying in her arms and El’s become a sympathetic crier so then they’re both crying and El starts crying harder because maybe she was wrong again and it’s not okay, obviously, if Will’s still sad? And that’s how Hopper and Joyce find them, hugging and crying their eyes out and the adults are so bewildered.

-The Byers get in the car to go home after they finally calm down (and Will assures El everything’s fine several times with hugs), and Joyce doesn’t even have to ask, she just gives him a concerned look and Will looks out the window to hide his face and takes a deep breath before he quietly admits, “I was crying because I told Jane I’m gay and she didn’t bat an eyelash, she just accepted me.”

-Joyce immediately pulls the car over and unbuckles her seat belt and leans over and hugs Will so tight, and he screws his eyes shut so he doesn’t see her face but he can hear her murmur “Sweetie, I have been waiting for you to accept yourself,” and suddenly a weight he didn’t even realize he’d been carrying is gone.

The remainder of the summer Will and El become closer than ever, while Mike strangely becomes frequently absent to Party events. One day in mid-August Mike visits El alone while the others are out seeing Back to the Future for the second time (because Dustin and Lucas started an argument about time travel mechanics after the first time and forced Will and Max to come again while they rewatch for research) and he’s only there 15 minutes before she quietly asks “Are you mad I kissed Will because I’m supposed to kiss you?”

Mike shakes his head furiously like a wet dog and assures her of course he isn’t, it was an accident and he’s over it, it’s been over a month, El, “I practically forgot about it already”, but she just looks at him thoughtfully and then her eyes widen the tiniest bit and she asks again, “Are you mad I kissed Will because you wanted to kiss Will?” and Mike’s face drains of color so fast it’s like he’s in a cartoon.

“What?! No, I–” he starts unconvincingly, his voice raising into a panicked shrillness, but interrupts himself, “Steve told you, didn’t he, or I mean he told Dustin who told you, or something, whatever, somehow it was that douchebag, wasn’t it? I knew I shouldn’t have trusted him, ‘master of romantic advice’ my ass!”

El is very confused but lets Mike rant about Steve Harrington being an untrustworthy jerk for a full five minutes before finally grabbing his hand and shaking her head. “Nobody told me anything. You seemed mad. So if you’re not mad about me then it’s about Will, right?”

And then Mike is very embarrassed because obviously Steve wouldn’t have said anything, he’s practically Dustin’s older brother now, but he can feel the “friends don’t lie” coming so he’s screwed anyway.

“Okay, fine, maybe I might have thought about it a little but… it’s because I think I might like boys too.”

“Like? Like you want to kiss?” El’s mental gears are turning and Mike nods, “Yeah, I still want to kiss girls but maybe boys too, Steve said it’s… that I don’t have to pick only one. Some people like both.” (Bisexual is much too complicated a term and Mike’s still not entirely convinced Steve didn’t make it up.)

-A light bulb goes off in El’s brain and she thinks hard for a minute before she says, “If you want, we don’t have to kiss anymore so you can try to kiss a boy,” and Mike’s eyebrows almost shoot clean off his head, but he looks at her carefully and sees she’s sincere and not upset, and for the first time he sees her solely as the girl she’s become, not the Eleven he first met nearly two years before, so quietly he just says “If that’s what you want, El.”

She nods but then narrows her eyes at him, “You’ll still like me as a friend?” and he smiles warmly and nods, “I’ll always like you as a friend, El, no matter what, even if it’s not the kissing kind of like,” and El’s heart jumps because maybe it is possible, maybe she’s really this lucky, she can keep all the good things she’s gained and still make Will happy too.

“But don’t tell anybody else I like boys, okay El?” Mike adds suddenly, and El nods, a smile creeping onto her face. El keeps her promises and tells nobody anything, but for the few weeks remaining in the summer, she occasionally wears a satisfied little smile, the cause of which even Max can’t get out of her.

-In the fall of ‘85 the kids all start high school, El a little nervous but feeling prepared thanks her friends and family (especially Will), and Will finally confident, at least a little, because he’s accepted himself and he’s got the best family ever and if anyone gives him shit, his future step-dad is the chief of police and his sister can break arms (and worse) with her mind and they all accept him too and love him no matter what. (He’s pretty sure the rest of his friends will too, but he promised himself that he wouldn’t tell them he’s gay until he told Mike first, because Will’s realized that’s been a long time coming and now’s as good a time as any since El told him vaguely about their “breakup”; Will knows he’s single and hasn’t had a chance to develop a crush on anyone else yet. He owes it to his best friend to be honest, and well, if Mike breaks his heart, [which he’s mostly expecting, tbh] Will believes at least he’ll still be his friend, and he’ll move on. Eventually.)

El is so happy when the complete Party meets for the first time in front of the school on the first day, finally all together in the open, and she doesn’t miss how her two closest friends look at each other. This will be a good year, El thinks.