#before covid i only got sick once or twice per year

[mxwhore]

god i feel like so much!!!! Ass!!!

[bi-dazai]

okay while we're on the subject of eating healthy and exercising, I want to vent/talk about weight loss. This is gonna be a rly controversial, very personal and extremely long post but I do want to make a point. I'm not going to discuss every fucking nuance of haes or my EDs. But for clarity, know that my eds are complicated and were mostly osfeds - minor anorexia osfed in high school and bed osfed when I was 18-19. after i realised how fat i was the minor anorexia came back and over the pandemic it became full scale anorexia nervosa.

I'm 5'3. The healthy weight range I should be in is in the high 40s-low 50s. I went up to TWICE that by the time I was just nineteen years old. It wasn't fun being fat. I consumed as much fat acceptance, fat activism content as I could, I pretended I was confident and happy even when I was fat. But I wasn't. Because people don't just get obese accidentally. A little overweight, yes. But obese? No. You get obese from depression, from giving up. You don't want to move so you don't. You're sad all the time, and the body positivity circles say eat comfort food, whatever and as much as it makes you feel better!! Do you know what that is? That's encouragement of BED. Do not say that. Because I did that. I ate sugar and junk food, I was still depressed.

I was reading these posts that were claiming fat people shouldn't be weighed at the doctor, that your weight shouldn't count, that BMI is incorrect and doesn't matter, etc etc. There were posts saying that they got "perfect bloodwork" (what even is that? I knew that was wrong, I've had chronic iron deficiency for a decade!) even though they were fat, so they had to be healthy, right? I got shown pictures of obese ballerinas and obese weightlifters blah blah blah. And I grew and grew, and I got to almost 85kg on the fast track to 100kg before reality smacked me in the face and I realised I was shortening my lifespan by decades.

Here's what it was like being obese!

- joint pain, constantly

- could barely walk anywhere without feeling out of breath

- couldn't find any fashionable, good quality clothes (plus size stores either carry unfashionable clothing, or fashionable but cheap quality clothing. I don't like to waste money on cheap clothes)

- more acne than I'd had in years

- oily skin

- more difficulty feeling "full"

- JOINT FUCKING PAIN

- rashes from skin rubbing against skin!

- even larger chest, making me MORE dysphoric

- back pain!!

- snoring - this is not just embarrassing. This is potentially deadly.

- DYSPHORIA

- KNEES. JOINT PAIN.

- DYSPHORIA

this was just things I felt physically, noticeably! The things that my fat was doing on the inside was even worse. Fat isn't just this layer of packing peanuts that appears on top of you. It coats your organs. It gets everywhere. It makes your entire body run worse.

Fat also makes it much more likely for you to not just GET cancer, but it it also makes it harder to FIGHT cancer. Being obese makes almost every single goddamn sickness on the planet worse because when you have THAT MUCH fat tissue the hormones and shit it secretes fucks EVERYTHING up.

Yes there are obese bodybuilders. Yes there are obese ballerinas. Let's talk about those two.

There are plenty of drs and dieticians who have pointed out the obvious - if an obese person was really, actually eating healthily and exercising every day, they would not stay obese forever. Its not magic, it's thermodynamics. CICO done right works for everyone. If you are eating healthy, appropriate portions for weight loss at your TDEE and exercising it would literally be IMPOSSIBLE for you not to lose weight!! Even more the heavier you are because when you exercise you carry around a lot more weight.

Obese weightlifters are still obese. They are not proof you can be obese and healthy. They are still going to die younger if they do not lose weight.

Let's talk about fat ballerinas. The only ones I've seen are trainee ballerinas, not professional ones. And their performance looks impressive at first, until you look closer. You notice their balance is never quite perfect, their control can be amazing and the best ever but they'll still be off. Why? Because fat moves around with your movement, and it displaces your balance and your line of movement. It's simply not possible to do something like ballet dancing as a fat person without risking major injury as well. En pointe is already stupid dangerous for the skinniest ballerina. Going en pointe at anything above 60kg is going to get progressively suckier the heavier you go. And god help your ankles because falling down will always end in a major injury.

I'm so fucking done with "fat acceptance". I'm tired of "body positivity" being a movement about obese middle-upper class white women and not about scars and disabilities etc like it was focused on in the start. I have no problems with Health at Every Size - every person should feel happy to workout, to eat healthy. I have no problem raising issue with people bullying others for their weight as well. That's wrong. But pretending that it's Healthy at Every Size is a fucking lie, and it's one that could've sentenced me to an early death. Healthy at Every Size said I was condemned to joint pain and oily skin and depression and exhaustion for the rest of my life based on cherrypicked sentences from studies that didn't agree with them. That "95% of diets fail" sentence in particular drives me up the wall. You don't need a diet to lose weight, you need healthy CICO, you need to eat below your TDEE, you need to eat healthy, and you need to exercise. All you have to do at first is go on a 10-20 minute walk, whatever pace you like, a few times a week.

You can BE fit, you CAN lose weight! You are not sentenced to having joint pain and an increased risk for cancer and a less effective COVID vaccine for life. You can change your body in incredibly ways. You have no idea what you are capable of.

There's this myth that weight loss takes keto and shakes and diet pills and crash diets etc. It doesn't. All it is is making sure you eat less than your TDEE, eating HEALTHY calories, and getting your heartrate up by exercising at least 175 minutes a week.

The human body is not meant to be obese. There's no such thing as a set point weight. There's CICO, there's nutrition, there's making sure your muscles dont atrophy. Weight loss and fitness isn't some magic thing that youre just born able to do. I was lazy throughout my entire teens. I thought fitness was something the popular girls did. It's not. It's for everyone. and everyone, especially in places with an obesity epidemic such as the US, UK, and Australia, should make use of it. It's a good thing. Walking is one of the best things you can do for your body, and it's incredibly rewarding in every way. Eating healthy and not eating until you feel like you're going to burst is rewarding in every way. And it's not like you can't ever have junk food again, you just have to limit it to a treat, a once or twice per week thing. And honestly, it makes it much more enjoyable that way.

Now I want to talk a little about my anorexia. My weight loss journey came to anorexia. This is because it was an eating disorder I'd had for a long time. I did not see a trainer or dietician, and I consciously decided to push myself too far. I consciously decide to eat less and exercise more when I am starving. This is not something that just happens because someone is eating at 1200cals. It happens because you have an eating disorder which you are born with. Saying people who eat 1200cals of healthy food a day and exercise right are "anorexic" is so fucking insulting to everyone involved. It's ableist and ignorant. 1200cals is also a pretty generous amount for anorexic ppl to eat. That's close to a binge in ED standards, so that should give you a reference for how offbase saying 1200cals is "anorexic" is.

My anorexia is healthy habits pushed into eating disorder territory. I eat healthy, yes, but I don't eat enough. I exercise, yes, but I often push myself too far when I'm already lacking energy. The advice I give people for health is correct, and I'm never going to go around saying "eat less than 1200cals" as weightloss advice. Eat less, sure, but there's a limit. Calorie counting is a good thing to do, tracking your macros and nutrients is good. But I do it too much.

I know what's healthy, a lot of ppl with restrictive and purgative EDs do. People with EDs can give some awesome health advice, we just can't follow it because we have a mental disorder. Believe it or not people with EDs discussing their EDs are not "pro-ana", pointing out that anorexia and people with anorexia are real and not some boogeyman you use to justify not losing weight and eating healthy is not pro-ana. Anorexia existing is not pro-ana and anorexics being anorexic has nothing to do with fatphobia.

this post is a rambling mess but i rly had to get some stuff clear on how I feel abt this stuff because it's getting concerning how much unhealthy shit, and then straight up ableist shit, that the fat acceptance crowd spews out.

A little exercise won't kill you, eating healthy won't kill you. You are not sentenced to ugly plus size fashion and joint pain and being out of breath for the rest of your life. Leave the Healthy at Every Size death cult and join the Health at Every Size movement. Let the doctor take your weight (it IS medically necessary). acknowledge that you are obese and it is affecting your health. It's scary but it can be the start of a new, healthy beginning. It was for me.

Losing 15kg has been the best thing in my life. Sure, the anorexia is there enjoying it for one reason. But the reason I truly enjoy it is because I've discovered what a healthier body feels like. I've discovered the joys of exercise, I've discovered the joys of eating healthy. I can fit nice clothes now. And I'm still overweight! I'm 66kg, that's 4kg away from the barest minimum acceptable healthy bmi. But I feel so so much better. I look better. I have a jawline! Good skin! Energy! It didn't fix me but it sure made me a hell of a lot better.

Please please try and eat healthy, eat an appropriate amount, go for walks. It's so so good, and if you do it right you WILL lose weight. You'll live past 50. You'll get to explore the world in a way you couldn't when going up stairs had you out of breath. You'll fit into that nice skirt you've been looking at. Your skin will clear up. You'll have energy and your mental health will improve.

It's so so fucking worth it to put effort into your health, like I cannot emphasise this enough. Please do it, I wish I could tell myself this when I was binging on junk because the FA crowd told me it was valid to comfort eat until I hurt.

[genuflectx]

Just wanna rant about my job a bit, will probably delete this later. But I think I may quit my job within the next month or so u_u’

Originally when I joined this job last year it was under originations- I helped people apply and get approved for loans, or offered general tech support when they needed help with the process online. I felt like I was helping these nice old people, they were rarely mean (save for the occasional grouchy old man after he gets rejected), and the work load was decent. Not too heavy, not too boring. 

Then the pandemic hit. My entire team, which had been hired only a few months before, were rushed in for “accelerated training” on the credit card support department. I believe it was just like 4 weeks of training for a tooootally different workflow. We worked in the servicing department for what, maybe a month? Then they furloughed a ton of people and managers and moved us AGAIN, this time to collections. So calling to collect debts on our credit card product. When I joined this company it was under the understanding I did NOT want to do collections because it makes me sad and feel shitty. But they promised us we would be transferred back to originations after a bit, so whatever.

Slowly things have gone downhill since. Just tiny things adding up. They implemented a internet speed minimum requirement, which is understandable working from home, but we lost another good chunk of people who got fired for that, some who I’d made friends with. Hell, I got THREATENED with firing due to this, forcing us to run an Ethernet cable through 2 stories of our house. And I was PISSED because I was the only one on the team making a 100% average on QA scores. Then a few people quit, leaving only 3 people from my original originations team. They hired a new manager to oversee work force management (WFM) and quality assurance (QA) around this point and I’m CONVINCED it got worse because of her changes...

They changed our outbound dialing system to a cheaper one, promising all these improvements, and who woulda guessed... the quality of work life barely improved with this piece of crap tech but hey, it cut costs. Next they dismantled the debt management company department (DMC) and trained us in it so we’re technically trained for and work in two departments. On top of the promise that in the far future that they will cross-train us with the loan department too, a totally different product. We also have to do the emails for our department as well.

Then things got bad. Non stop calls for a months. Likely related to the unfortunate weather disasters in our outsourced locations. The outbound dialer, which is an autodialer that WFM loads up with late people to auto-call, starting filling up with impossible amounts of people to call for our agent count. We started going from 5000 to call every few hours to 10,000. And it doesn’t matter if we don’t clear the queue, they will load more in at certain times of the day. So we’d get 10,000 at 1pm, we’d get it down to 3,000 by 5pm, and they’d just load it back up to 10,000 again. 

Then they added on the mandatory overtime. Everyone in our department either has to do a half shift extra on either saturday or sunday- with mine being on saturday. Another person quit (down to 2 from my original team). We’re understaffed as hell and they tell us that they’re FINALLY training a new class. And know what? They ONLY enacted the OT and got a new class because their service levels were down. Service levels are a mandatory legal level of how many agents per how many customers we have, they get in legal trouble when it drops too far for too long. They didn’t give a shit about our stress until their damn legal agreement dropped and then forced the OT on us. Wow. We feel so appreciated. 

And THEN the OT was supposed to go until Feb 14th- today. THEY EXTENDED IT ANOTHER WEEK. 

And and and a few days after they told us it was extended these dudes LAY OFF 3 managers, including our team’s manager, who I REALLY liked, and stuck us into the team of a manager who is notorious for giving out incorrect policy info! Why! >:( 

Some other small things they’ve done that have added up slowly: They sent me a “nice” alluminum mug for my high QA score. Stuck it in the washer once and the pretty gold lettering on the front melted. It also leaks. They do these “thank you” videos some time where the upper management (never faces you recognize save for 2 or 3). BUT they made us watch this 10 minute long “thank you” Christmas video BETWEEN CALLS instead of scheduling time for us to do it like usual. Due to the short staffing, they changed how our weekly meetings with our manager/team go. Instead of having the whole team go into a meeting with her twice per week, they made her split this into 3 smaller meetings once per week, so that 2 or 3 team members meet with her at a time (more people on the floor to take calls). It spread her thin- before they laid her off of course. After they enacted the OT a week or so into it one of the upper management people sent us all an email telling us we basically weren’t doing good enough because our collections numbers weren’t high enough.. KNOWING we’re under staffed, she still emailed that. Come on.

So ya know what? My fiance and friends have encouraged me to just move on. This company isn’t what it was when I started a year ago, and idk if it’s legit just due to covid or if this WFM/QA overseer that they hired near the end of 2020 is fully to blame. I hate hearing customers tell me day in day out about their family dying, about being homeless/evicted. I hate old ladies screaming at me because they can’t comprehend that WE ARE IN A PANDEMIC and the MAIL WILL BE LATE, so their damn paper checks need to be mailed out at least 2-3 weeks in advanced- OR THEY COULD JUST CALL AND PAY LIKE NORMAL PEOPLE. Tired of people insulting me and calling me names because THEY’RE late and THEY missed a payment and they can’t accept responsibility- because they think screaming at someone making a few bucks over min wage will do anyone any good or make their shitty credit score any better.

All this mandatory OT and my nice manager being fired has put a lot of stress on me, if the other crap wasn’t enough. We’re really financially stable in this household even if I did quit, even if I’d feel guilty af. And it could be months before I found another job as safe and well-paying as this one, but at least my mental health would recover.

So I have about a day of sick time and 80 hours of PTO. My plan is to hopefully schedule out all 80 hours, or at least 85% of my PTO if I can, then when I come back to put in a 1 week notice. By then the new agents will be in full swing. I can get the money from the PTO I earned at this shit collections job and then try and move on to bigger and better things. And in the mean time while looking, I can work on art/writing and I can also possibly get a new car with all the money we’ve saved up. My mama and granny might end up disapproving and judge me but 2020 was such a shit year and I’m tired of this. I feel like this job is taking advantage of us and legit just doesn’t give a crap about their employees.

Okay! Well that’s outta my system! Bleck

[phoenix-angel-suyari]

I’m having a really rough day and I can’t even drink.

I don’t even know where to start...

So, I think I’m just gonna bullet point this bitch. 

- On Monday, I missed my therapy appointment which I only get once every 2-3 weeks and never seem to be long enough at anywhere from 20-40 minutes per session depending upon my therapist’s availability. There’s a LOT wrong with my therapy situation, but at the moment I’m honestly, seriously lucky to be able to have therapy at all in the first place. So as much as it sucks, at the very least I am receiving mental health care and that’s all that matters. 

However, my missed therapy appointment was not my fault. The night before I was called by the office in regards to my appointment and the coming storm. I was offered a rescheduled in person or a telehealth appointment. Now, as much as I despise the telehealth appointments - entirely because of my living situation - as rare as my appointments can be, semi-consistent therapy has caused me to sort of NEED them. I never get around to actually talking about what I need or want to talk about, but just venting some things is helpful so I opted for the telehealth appointment instead. I was told my appointment had been turned into a telehealth and would retain it’s time slot. 

The next morning, I made sure I was awake and prepared. Nine o’clock came. No phone call. So, I waited. Ten o’clock came. No phone call. By eleven, I thought, I’d make brunch (I only eat twice a day) because I needed to take my medication. By twelve, I figured, I’d go shovel because the snow was coming down by the foot. My therapist called while I was shoveling and was told I was unavailable. She said she’d call back at 1. So I finished up, took a quick shower to get warm and waited. I ended up waiting all day and she never called back. 

I’d assumed initially when time was going by and she wasn’t calling that perhaps I had been the only one who opted for telehealth and she’d misread an email that had let her know she essentially had the day free. I still don’t know what happened there, but I am hoping it doesn’t count as some sort of strike against me (the hospital has a three strikes and they drop you situation) because it was NOT my fault. 

Regardless, now it’s gonna be over a month between when I last spoke to my therapist and when I next speak to my therapist. And honestly, the only saving grace is that I will be seeing my Psychiatrist on Tuesday and she’ll listen to me and I can cry in her office if I need to then. 

- I’m smack dab in the middle of a mid life crisis and I’ve been struggling with it. I know I’d still be where I am if not for covid, but I still can’t help like feeling as if covid has made me lose valuable time I will never get back and which I am quickly running out of to turn my life around. 

This has not been aided at all by a slew of strange but not disturbing, just confusing as hell dreams, and my family being my family. 

- Speaking of my family...

Yesterday, some of us who have been tested recently and/or already finished receiving both doses of vaccination got together for the first time in a year. And it was nice. Enjoyable. I couldn’t really drink because my new meds really do not mesh well with alcohol - which I tested safely at home and learned the hard way. 

Now, it’s important to note that my sister has been pressuring me to open an OnlyFans because in her opinion it’s something easy I can do to make money and it makes no sense for me not to. (We’re not going to get into these “discussions” held previously, only know there have been way more than there should be.) 

So, we’re talking and I point out that everyone sitting around the table is married already and so they at least don’t have to worry about finding someone in all this mess, as it drags on longer and longer. I finally caved and after years of just letting them come at me while not bothering to ever do any work like introducing me to someone they thought I might get along with, I confronted them about it. I was like, “Look, everyone seems to forget they met their spouses through someone else INTRODUCING them. So, if you know someone who’s single and looking for long term - marriage and a family - then please, feel free to hook me up.” 

I was then told - rather seriously - that I should go on a tv show. I - rightly so - pointed out that I didn’t trust shows like that to set me up with anyone because they’re all about the drama and why should I even have to go on tv for something like that. My sister then proceeded to tell everyone how she thought I should open an OnlyFans. Instead of being surprised or anything by this, my family proceeded to spend the next hour trying to convince me to do something I don’t want to do. They basically laid it all out in a start to finish establishing a fan base and getting a patreon to crowdfund the basics for an OnlyFans. They worked out and tried to sell me on content I could offer and when I countered, “Even if I wanted to - which I DON’T - explain to me how the hell I’m supposed to do any of that in THAT house.” The answer being that it was entirely possible. I just had to figure it out. 

My sister said, “You do it like you do when you exercise.” And like when I WHAT?! I’m not ALLOWED to exercise. It “makes too much noise” and invites derision. Which I then have to suffer through. She then proceeded to inform me that I could always establish a career as a Sugar baby. “You don’t even have to have sex with them, you just have to dress pretty and make them feel important.” Can I do the second one? Absolutely. The first is not possible. We argued about it and she was like, “It works! My friend did it in college and she got an apartment and everything!” And I countered that even though there’s nothing wrong with that, it’s a LIFESTYLE and it’s most lucrative for people in their twenties, not someone like me. Which apparently, is an excuse? Because I need an excuse to object to something I fucking objected to when I was IN my twenties. 

So, anyway, I learned that my family seems to enjoy my singleness as a source of conversation, if not entertainment, but which is somehow fulfilling for them because even when I come right out and fucking ASK THEM to HELP ME find someone, it somehow becomes that I don’t need a someone when I can be a camgirl instead. 

I even pointed out that I could make JUST AS MUCH with a cute dog whom I could make an entire social media platform for and was told in like the most what the fuck moment of the evening, “With what money?!” Like, are you fucking SERIOUS?! There was a whole conversation detailing and planning how to get me to be a camgirl and we can’t figure out a fucking DOG?!

I am so fucking done with all of it.    

- I was feeling really sick last night when I got home, like I might throw up and so I just took a shower and went to bed. But, because I did that, I never took any of my meds last night - which is when I take the bulk of them - and my body is just NOT HAVING IT. 

- For some reason my family wanted to have a dog movie marathon today that like, I enjoy those movies, but they’re emotional as fuck for me and I was already not feeling okay, and then wanted to subject me to that. I watched like half an hour of one and then left. 

- I’m not even getting into the dinner fiasco. 

I took a fucking swan dive into a depressive oubliette and the only thing I can hope for is that taking my meds tonight will give me the protective boost enough to not be completely lost tomorrow. I have now learned the hard way that my explanation to my doctors about how my anti-depressants are like doing the brunt of the work to make me capable of daily life without a complete mental breakdown is in fact not a handy analogy. I have learned my lesson. I will not be missing a dose again. 

I’ve never been a smoker but my god, could I use a cigarette right now. 

I did receive some good news this week at least. My liver’s finally healed. I’m gonna have to be on medication for the rest of my life to ensure that, but that’s one organ that forgave me at least. 

I’m going back to sleep. 

[rememberthattime]

Chapter 53. Lockdown

It’s been almost five months since my last post:  Finland at the start of February.  That seems so long ago – in fact, it’s by far the longest Chelsay & I have gone without a trip in our five years abroad.  

These are extenuating and unfortunate circumstances though.  The global Coronavirus pandemic has put the entire world in lockdown, with far more dangerous and deadly consequences for the millions infected. I don’t want to go into the staggering statistics, but I can safely say that every single person on Earth has been impacted. Even saying that, it is likely we won’t know the virus’ true toll for many years.

However, the purpose of this blog is to “record” Chelsay & I’s present thoughts, emotions, and experiences. In 20 years, I want to read these words and relive our time abroad.

The 2020 lockdown is historically and personally unique – likely more noteworthy than an individual trip we’ve taken. That said, there would be a gap in this record if I didn’t post about Chelsay & I’s lockdown experience.

I’ll start out by saying that Chelsay & I have been very lucky. We’ve been bored more than usual, but with lockdown coming to an end soon, we’ve made it through relatively easily.

The biggest reason: Indy! I briefly mentioned our new dog in the Finland post, but we didn’t bring him home until a few weeks later, just before the lockdown began. It was absolutely perfect timing:

Chelsay and I had stressed about how we would alternate working-from-home while Indy was a puppy. After coronavirus, this was a moot point… I’m not sure Chelsay or I will ever go back into our London offices.  

Chelsay & I would’ve been painfully bored being locked at home for months, but Indy has been a blast. Play time, training, and walks have filled our otherwise open schedules.

That said, things weren’t so easy early on: Indy’s first two weeks with us were painful. Really really bad. He had a stomach bug when we picked him up so, starting with the first drive home, he was either throwing up or pooping every 45 minutes.

Making matters worse, we were staying in a terrible basement AirBnB – the only one in London that allowed dogs. Beyond the complete absence of daylight, the other downside of this AirBnB was the thin walls… We tried having Indy sleep on his own, but he would HOWL incessantly. The neighbors were unexpectedly understanding for the first 15 minutes, but their (and our) patience ended when his crying hit the 1-hour mark.

With all this pooping & howling, I’ll freely admit that I regretted getting a dog.  I’d expected a much easier transition, but the combination of his stomach bug & our dreadful AirBnB changed everything. That said, we stuck it out, and I actually think I learned a lot about patience & perseverance… And I’m just really happy Indy pooped all over the AirBnB instead of our permanent home.

This is a good transition to our other main lockdown activity: settling into our new house. In my last post, I mentioned that we found this place within 24 hours of landing in London – a testament to our organization, motivation, and ability to fight off jetlag.

Settling in is always tough, but we had reason for optimism: Chelsay had meticulously coordinated the furniture & homeware shipments for our move-in date. Although most of the deliveries were completed without hiccup, some of the larger items were derailed when the UK went into lockdown. …The shipping company refused to deliver our items – I eventually found a creative solution that I won’t go into, but it meant out our couch, TV, and all kitchen cookware were locked away in a warehouse for an extra few weeks.  

In the meantime, Chelsay, Indy, & I were living the college-lifestyle: we put the guest mattress in our living room as a couch replacement, used a computer monitor as a TV, and ate breakfast, lunch, and dinner for an entire month with only two forks!

That said, the benefit of missing furniture was the extra room for Indy to run around.  Actually, we had plenty of space even once ALL our furniture arrived! Our new flat is twice the size of the Manly apartment, and nearly the size of our previous THREE apartments combined! And that’s without considering the backyard, where Indy could roam freely, play fetch, get his zoomies out… or participate in the 2020 NFL Combine.

Although it took a few weeks to fill the house, we immediately felt settled in our new neighborhood. Chelsay & I loved Hampstead the first time we lived in London, so it was our top choice house hunting… All 24 hours of house hunting.

Hampstead is undeniably London’s most charming & cozy neighbourhood: knobbly alleys, off-kilter homes, mossy lattices, vine covered brick facades. Close to the city, but very much an English village.

It is also home to one of London’s largest parks, Hampstead Heath, which isn’t even really a park. It’s a forest. A wild, unmaintained maze of trees, vines, and brush, with pockets of open heath sprinkled around. Every weekday morning around 6:45 and every night around 6:30, Chelsay, Indy, and I set out for a walk through the park. Indy loves the night walk especially (when we bring his frisbee), but the walks aren’t just for him: Chelsay and I love the fresh air in the morning, and relaxing wind-down at night.

These walks are one staple of our weekday routine, with the other being Chelsay & I’s daily lunch together. Despite work being busy for both of us throughout the lockdown, we’ve found time to take lunch together every single day.  It’s a flashback to Seattle, when Chelsay & I both worked in South Lake Union and we’d meet up a few times per week. These little breaks split up the day, and help us both prepare for busy afternoons. …The only problem is that we’re getting really tired of cooking. We haven’t gone to a restaurant since February 22. Today is June 26.

Weekends have their own routine as well.  Although we wake up early (a new talent of Chelsay’s), we’ll take our time with a bigger breakfast like huevos rancheros. We’ll then saddle Indy up for our primary weekend activity: a 2-3 hour walk through the Heath. These walks have been excellent for so many reasons:

The Heath is gorgeous, as described earlier. Each walk is unique, and we haven’t followed the same route yet.

The weather has been historically great: May was the sunniest month since Britain began recording in 1862!

It tuckers Indy out. He’ll go to sleep for 6 hours after we get back from our weekend walks.

Indy’s exhaustion gives Chelsay & I a chance to FaceTime with our families, a weekly highlight. With everyone in lockdown, its far easier to find a time when everyone can join: both our parents and our siblings (it’s not like we were doing anything else!). Our typical agenda goes: game night, recommend shows, make fun of each other’s unkept appearance. 

The rest of our routine weekend day is spent planning.  Both Chelsay and I have our own roles:

Chelsay tends to handle household preparedness. I have to give her credit – she was way ahead of the curve on Coronavirus. A week or two before the rest of the world caught on, Chelsay was already stocking up on essentials – and more importantly, reserving our online grocery delivery orders into May. This was SO. DAMN. CRITICAL. We went into Waitrose once in early March, and it was a genuine nightmare. You could feel the anxiety in the air: long lines to enter, with everyone panic-buying, irritable, and on-edge while trying to socially distance. It was so important that Chelsay stocked up beforehand and reserved those slots, ensuring we wouldn’t need to visit the grocery store.  Once lockdown started, every delivery service froze new member sign-up and locked delivery scheduling.  

While Chelsay made sure we survived the lockdown, I was ensuring our travel agenda hit the ground running once restrictions were lifted. I’ve probably planned 15 different variations of trips in the past four months, scrupulously researching options that were exciting, feasible, and most importantly of all, cancellable. Although Puglia in April and the Lakes District in May ultimately needed to be cancelled, the following trips *seem* like they might be okay: Scotland road trip in July, Paris by train in late August, Central Europe road trip in September, and Egypt in October. KNOCK ON WOOD!

Now, the standard weekend includes these long walks, family Facetimes, & planning sessions, but Chelsay and I have still fit in a few exciting breaks from the routine.

First, Chelsay’s 30th birthday fell in the middle of lockdown. We’d originally planned to relive her favorite trip by visiting Scotland, but obviously that was no longer an option. Determined to celebrate her milestone birthday from home, I surprised her with balloons around the house and a ready-made dinner including lamb shanks, potatoes dauphinoise, and glazed carrots. Chelsay pre-baked dessert: a funfetti cake.

Second, as lockdown measures began to ease, we started taking day trips within England. Our first escapade was a short drive to Richmond, where Indy got sick in the car… With our Scotland roadtrip booked, we knew he needed better driving experience, so we immediately booked rental cars for the following three Saturdays. These trips were great car training for Indy, but more importantly brought us to some of the UK’s prettiest locations: Richmond, the Cotswolds, Seven Sisters, and Peak District.

I’ll end this post by emphasizing how lucky Chelsay & I have been during this lockdown. As I mentioned in the introduction, every single person in the world has been impacted by Covid in some way… but Chelsay and I have made it through relatively easily.

We’ll always remember this Global Pandemic and our four months stuck at home, but we’ll also remember the extra time we got to have with our new new puppy, or enjoying our new home and neighbourhood. We’ll remember how the extra planning time made our Scotland, EuroTrip, and Egypt trips that much more special. And most of all, we’ll remember that our friends & family remained safe and healthy throughout.