#bleghhh
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SIR WHERE ARE YOU GOING WITH THAT
#transformers prime#transformers#tfp#skybiie art#transformers fanart#tfp smokescreen#transformers art#transformers smokescreen#smokescreen#transformers prime smokescreen#smokescreen Skybiie#bleghhh#art meme
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Covid broke my brain in a very specific way, i keep spelling things based on how they sound in my head rather than how i intend to spell them based on my understanding of language. For example earlier today i tried to say āI won a gameā but because i was not 1000% focused on it i typed āI one a gameā. Itās like a few very niche neural connections died off and even though itās not debilitating itās frustratingly visible to me and when i donāt Catch It it makes me look like a dumbass.
#my stuff#bleghhh#iāve also had likeā¦blood pressure issues in my head. like now iāll just randomly get the sense that the blood in my head is passing through#in a way thatās painful and briefly swollen
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(Based off of the reality of having a metal ring in your back as a constant reminder of your fate and how that affects you as a person set in the Switzerland arc)
āDoes it hurt?āĀ
Avaās pressed face down into the pillow sleep curling around her limbs. She hums, she canāt remember what she says, sheās exhausted. Her arms are tangled beneath her pillow. She holds her fingers tightly between each other, her bones ache from the pressure but her hands no longer shake. Ava hasnāt experienced this before, a fear that haunts her at night. (She finds she cannot stop dreaming about dying. Itās stifling in the cover of night trying to figure out where she is.)Ā
She slowly opens her eyes and squints in the darkness. Beatrice is facing her a furrow in her brow that Ava knows sheās doing unconsciously. Avaās lip quirks a smidgen, Beatrice looks funny. Itās a bit silly to her, Beatrice no doubt working out a solution to an unknown problem that Ava has yet to see in the middle of the night. In her sleepy state she wants to laugh at the imaginary cogs churning in Beatriceās head.Ā
Beatrice scooches closer and Ava panics, her skin can taste the dust of Beaās forearm. She hoists herself up on her elbows, turning to face Beatrice. āWha?ā Avaās shaking off bits of sleep from her mouth when Beatrice repeats herself.Ā
āDoes the Halo hurt?āĀ
She doesnāt know if she wants to answer that. Ava peers over Beatrice squinting at the harsh light of the digital clock on Beatriceās side. Ava loves it, it reminds her of the early 2000ās and the aesthetic of waking up to an alarm to go somewhere. The clock blinks an innocent 1:43 Am, and Ava debates on letting her head thump back down.Ā
She turns her body on her side, she can feel the halo shifting in her back and it makes her want to throw up. The sides of the halo press against her shoulder blades and Ava resists the urge to yank it out. She grits her teeth and settles ignoring the skin of her back pulling tight to accommodate for the ring. Beatrice is still expecting an answer and Ava canāt lie to her, she pulls the covers of the sheet up to her chest hoping to bide more time for an answer.Ā
"Everything hurts Bea," Ava smiles, "getting my ass handed to me is hard work."
Beatrice frowns displeased but looks at her through her lashes, it's unguarded, the stress and worries of the world stay out of their room in the dead of night. Her lashes are so pretty and Ava wants to curse the soft glow of the moon. Thereās just enough moonlight to illuminate her eyes but overshadow her freckles. Ava swallows down the taste of defeat, she canāt win, she thinks.Ā
Her gaze is soft, Beatrice is looking at her and itās different yet the same. The same feeling in her chest constricting her lungs, the same soft gaze of Beatrice. Beatrice who likes what she sees in Ava when Ava can barely see where she begins. She doesnāt like to dwell on it, the truth of the matter being what belongs to Ava.
If she closes her eyes she can pretend just a little longer. She can give herself the hope of the future and what comes after all this. She can put down the fighting and the artifact and live. Ava doesn't want to think about it anymore, at least not tonight when Beatrice is here with her.Ā
Beatrice is soft. She knows it from hours and hours of training. She's felt it when Beatrice corrects her form, in the way she talks. She speaks from a place of care like she has turned the harsh words in her brain over and over to soften the syllables spoken to Ava. And Ava doesn't linger on it, the meaning behind it, (Ava didn't think she'd make it this far, finding a person who cares quite like Bea does.)
And Ava's got it bad, she knows she's fucked because Beatrice doesnāt say anything about her language and Ava can't not tell her the truth. She looks down, her hand fiddling with the bed sheet underneath them.Ā
"It doesn't hurt," if she thinks about it she can feel the fibers of the cotton between the pads of her fingers. "But it's very uncomfortable." She doesn't want to find the response in Beatrice's eyes, content to hear it from her voice. The soft British lilting accent that holds her just as soft as a touch.Ā
She waits, she can picture Beaās mannerisms with her eyes closed but maybe she should check just to be sure. Ava peers up at Beatrice and sheās suddenly closer. Her eyes really are pretty, thereās a depth to them that Ava wants to spend an ungodly amount of time studying.
āCan I help?ā (part 2)
#tko_writes#AND THEN THEY BANGGGG NASTY UGLY HARDDDDD#tenatively titled:#Do you think i'm kind?#in which i dump soup all over this google doc#soup being trauma#yeah this is ooc what about it#i need to go to bed right now#can u believe it i wrote something relatively normal#bleghhh#it wasn't as bad as I thought it would go#canon writing is boring to me personally but this wasn't too bad#it's just like blah blah imagine having a metal ring in ur back and how sleeping on ur side affects your body#just like body horror#and like the constant reminder of it because how do u escape something that's so uncomfortable sitting between ur shoulder blades but#helps you move and do all the things u dreamed of???#anyway got bonked with this idea talking with ard#everyone thank ard for this if u liked it#i was supposed to write more but i've gotta go to bed#Ava's thoughts are all over the place but i'm gonna say that's cuz she's sleepy#something somethign it's just all the trauma she's gone through because she's had the halo is present and she's constantly reminded of it#because it jostles inside of her and no one was really fit to house a halo#something something GET RID OF THE HALO BEARERS LET THOSE WOMEN LIVE THEIR LIVES#RAHHHHHHHHHHHHH
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Banana, you really gotta draw Wretched!Caine
I'm going insane to get my hands on that cuck of a man

YOUR WISH IS MY COMAND it was abt time i drew this monster of an AI
Yeah. Thats him
#sorry it took so long to get to this#dealing with irl stuff!#but yeah anyway hes evil and gross#bleghhh#wretched!caine#the wretched digital circus au#banana asks
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11:11
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washing my hair and getting into the shower... yeah this world is a prison and life is a torture
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random pfp i drew for insta. . .
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so imagine rehab butits on fridays
mrrp
#hello charlotte#henry huxley#i dont rlly like this but wtv man..........#bleghhh#is rehab friday a tag????? umm#idk man.................
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Why does work schedule me for 6 AM T-T
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omggg i look and smell like shit LOL
#ā§ chatting !#yo#i was out until 3am LMFAOOOOO#also i smell like smoke š cause of the burning . . . and i didnt want to shower so its liek i marinated in the smell . . .#bleghhh#AND MY UNDEREYES LOOK SO BAD hashtag girl
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#not the biggest fan of how this came out#my art#lor fanart#library of ruina#library of ruina fanart#project moon#project moon fanart#elena lor#bleghhh#eyestrain warning
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ur boy died but uh have an art glow up i guess

one year ago today vs the drawing i just finished
#iām not tagging bowser or normie au#my ass is too lazy and i donāt care enough for that#fighterdraws#art comparison#glow up#also yeah human bowser design just dropped /silly#i canāt remember the last time i posted art here fr#i should do it more#but like i only ever draw oc stuff#and random aus i make up#and i canāt be asked to learn how to tag for every fandom i join for like a week#yk#idk should i post my random fanart???#bleghhh#happy halloween#btw thought i should mention that
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I don't wanna finish it
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if I draw them anymore Iāll throw up. Some older and more mature guyhal
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raggh i remember now why i stopped having sideblogs for fandoms
#yo i cannot be bothered to be posting shit to the right account#but on the otehr hand i like it better when its seperated#bleghhh#vik complains
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