* @bukley prompted: ❛ look at me… i’m not gonna make it. it’s okay, i’m fine with that. but… you can’t stay here. you’ve got a good long life ahead of you. & you’re smart, too; too smart to wait around here & waste that long life. so you get out of here, & you go live that life. live it for both of us. will you promise me you’ll do that ? ❜
they were stumbling . . . less cautious over the thick vines that crept across the ground, exhaustion clinging to their bones like the grief that followed their trail. particles of the upside down scratching throats while the struggle to breath could be heard in their sharp inhales of breath. with each passing step he could feel robin slump a little more, practically taking her weight on as his own while struggling to remain upright became more pressing. when her legs give out from underneath, the surprise of it has him crumbling with her, a groaned curse falling free from split lips while he disentangled their limbs. gently trying to maneuver robin while nonsense poured freely from her throat ( blame it on the adrenaline . . . on the way her mouth worked faster than her brain could keep up ).
one minute . . . he’ll give them one minute of rest before they keep going . . . before they both get out of here. her frame cradled in his arms, while he attempted to find the source of what had been causing warmth that wasn’t his own to spread down his side. ❛ yeah, no. that’s not happening. ❜ he wasn’t fine with it . . . there was nothing fine about this, about the idea that she was ready to give up or that this speech held any weight. he was the idiot ( not enough thumps to the head could correct that ) . . . the guy with no prospects of a future, who worked minimum wage jobs because his douchebag dad wouldn’t let him live down his failure at higher education. he wasn’t the one who was supposed to make it ( comfortable with being the last priority ). . . she had her whole life ahead of her, promise . . . a chance to escape this shit hole of a town & be something bigger than he could ever imagine. ❛ you’re gonna be fine, okay ? i’m right here . . . ❜
mumbled apologies spared while he pressed firmly to the wound that was leaving a puddle he couldn’t acknowledge right now . . . ( how the hell was he gonna get her out of here ? ) glancing around, throat rasp from the multiple crushing chokeholds suffered through the day ( in that moment there was no care as he screamed for someone to help . . . for anyone to show up ). ❛ we’re gonna get you outta here & . . . you’re gonna be fine. ❜ unsure who was trying to be convinced . . . the fight draining from her eyes had a terror filling his. robin was always so full of life ( almost annoyingly so at times ) . . . she kept him sane in a way, his anchor in the never ending storm, a safe haven when all he had known before her was an echoing emptiness. she was his person . . . & losing her . . . it’s like losing a limb.
phantom pains to exist in her place, unsure his own survival rate without her comforting hand between his shoulder blades. relied on her more than he realized . . . but more importantly, he knew she still had so much to offer. there were hopes & dreams that she had laid trust in him to keep & she deserved to experience those things ( trading places with her would be a deal he’d make without a moment of consideration ). ❛ it’s gonna work out for us . . . we’re, you’re gonna make it . . . ❜ wasn’t making that promise that he’d live for them both . . . couldn’t . . . how could he ? unsteady hands come up to cup her cheek, smearing scarlet against pale white ( horrific in the way he couldn’t tell which of theirs it was ). shaking her slightly, as if that would be enough to earn him a glare & one of her classic warnings paired with the familiar ‘ dingus ’ tease ❛ c’mon robin . . . i can’t do this without you, alright ? i . . . don’t do this. ❜ ( ‘ don’t leave me ’ balancing at the tip of his tongue while tears leave tracks in the dirt coating his bruised face ). it was his fault . . . he brought her into this bullshit when all she had been trying to do was make a living. ❛ god dammit robin ! open your eyes . . . please . . . ❜ he wasn’t ready to stop being robin buckley’s schmuck ( it was fun while it lasted ).
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log date : 09 / 13 / 1985 .
⤷ fuck this town . ft . @bukley !
HIGH SCHOOL SUCKS . high school like , majorly , royally fucking sucks . before we started this year , we all agreed - those of us that are left , at least . the three of us . we wanted things to be different . . . WISHFUL FUCKING THINKING ! dustin & i , we can’t just decide to be cool now . lucas is making a big hit with the basketball team . i’m trying not to be bitter , because i’m happy for him , but he makes it seem so easy . he flashes that winning smile & everyone forgets he’s friends with the FREAKS . i never wanted to be like other people , but i’m so tired of being singled out & picked on & cast aside .
anyway , i didn’t eat alone today . it turns out ROBIN has the same lunch period as dustin & i - robin from starcourt . i didn’t remember much besides her name , but since dustin was out today , i asked to sit with her so i didn’t end up dining in the bathroom AGAIN . she said yeah , & she turned out to be pretty cool . her & steve work at the video store now so i asked her about movies just to fill the silence . lunch felt WAY TOO SHORT once we really got talking . i didn’t even touch my plate .
NOTE TO SELF : ask robin for horror movie recs . stop by family video & rent BACK TO THE FUTURE .
fun fact of the day . . . THRESHER SHARKS use their tail to stun their prey before they eat them . i want to see one in real life .
journal entries , accepting !
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WHAT’S ON JIM HOPPER’S IPHONE ?
↳ ft. ROBIN BUCKLEY
@bukley
temp.
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robin buckley , it's too crowded in here! i need some air!
she was dancing, having a good time, enjoying the buzz and static in her head. carter hadn’t noticed robin approach, and though she grins at the other girl when she sees her, expression turns to concern when robin begins to speak. ‘ okay, okay, here - let’s go out the front, ’ long and painted fingers grip onto robin’s own, forging a path through the drunken teenagers to get robin safely outside. air rushes through the door as carter swings it open, helping the other step over the threshold. taking a deep breath, carter reaches out her hands instinctively to steady robin, should she need any extra support. ‘ are you okay? ’ @bukley.
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no thanks
i blacked this out it was so rude
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the snort that leaves you is loud enough to make you blush had you been around anyone but robin. the drive back to hawkins from nyu for winter break was long; you’re on hour seven of almost twelve, halfway through, but it still feels like you have a lifetime to go. you’ve pulled over into a gas station about five minutes ago, to stretch your legs, and to find something to eat for relatively cheap. ( you’re poor college students, and with having to pay for gas, neither of you can afford to go to a restaurant. )
❝ i'm sure you’ll scare the shit out of him with it, ❞ you’re pulling at the tab of your can of coke, the sizzle acting as background noise besides the rumbling of other cars passing by. you don’t even know if his cooking is that bad –––– but you know that, despite getting your egos bruised with trying to make thanksgiving dinner this year ( there’s still a scorch mark above the oven from the cranberry sauce catching on fire, shit, you need to get rid of it if you want a chance of getting your security deposit back! ), the two of you have improved immensely since then. if robin wanted to act like a food critic, then you might as well let her. ❝ oh, can i be your sous chef? who’s gordon’s –––– scott? i wanna be him, ❞
@bukley: i’m channeling my inner gordon ramsay if I have to eat steve’s cooking.
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@bukley said: ❛ no offense, but you look terrible. ❜
a scoff of disbelief breaks out of your lips, hand instinctively going up to run through your hair. terrible? there is absolutely no way you look terrible. sure, you had just been attacked by... vecna-demogorgo-bats, but still! terrible? that had to be an overreaction. ❝ no offense, but you look terrible, ❞ you repeat quietly, mocking robin under your breath ( much like a child, yes, but luckily henderson is not around to point it out. ) ❝ why say no offense when you are about to say something offensive? plus, i do not look terrible. maybe a little bruised but... that’s understandable considering those... things attacked me and almost ripped out my intestines! ❞ perhaps you are being dramatic but it is nothing if not warranted given she said you look terrible. TERRIBLE! ❝ okay but... be honest, how terrible? ❞
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@bukley liked !
❝ . . . i promise i won’t give you rabies . ❞
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@bukley : [ CONTINUED FROM HERE . ]
he’s no stranger to the way breath hitches , anxiety something that often found a home within his body . this time was no different , but he tries to swallow it down , to keep his voice from breaking . “ HEY , HEY , IT’S OKAY . ” the flashlight in his hand long since darkened , the only source of light flickering from robin’s identical one . for a quick second , he wishes that the electricity running through his veins would burst , allowing the now dead radio to work . ( he’d seen his sister do it before , hadn’t he ? these . . . powers , they had to be good for something . ) instead , he feels a little silly as he looks at the object with narrowed eyes . he quickly allows his attention to drift , pretending that he hadn’t been trying to get the radio to work . once again , he was reminded that he was only good for breaking things . “ they’ll find us . we wouldn’t just go home with all of this happening and they know it . ” HE LIKED TO BELIEVE THEY WOULD , AT LEAST . it’s hard to remain hopeful in a situation like this , but if he wasn’t , he feared neither of them would make it through this with their sanity intact . he gathers his nerve then , breathing in deeply to rid himself of the bleak thoughts in his head . “ i don’t think this has anything to do with dead batteries . IT’S — IT’S THE AIR IN HERE OR SOMETHING . i changed the ones of my flashlight before we left . ” the excuse sounded weak even to his ears .
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* @bukley prompted: ❛ i just want to stay here, watch movies all day, & cuddle with you on the couch. ❜
head throbs . . . a migraine eating the morning away as he drifted in & out of a state of consciousness ( happens every now & again, one he can’t shove under the rug & act as if his skull isn’t breaking apart ). with blinds drawn a darkness that sends a shiver down his spine had coated the apartment ( it’s not that he’s afraid of the dark . . . it’s that he knows what lurks there ). head lifts from the throw pillow, absentmindedly rubbing sleep pinched features ( the pulsing against his temples had lessened ), eye crack open & there isn’t a ounce of surprise to see them on the couch beside him, considers this place their home as much as it is his. it’s comforting, their weight sinking in the cushion next to him, the warmth their lanky frame emitted ( it had been as though subconsciously he knew it had been safe enough to remain removed from the world, they’d watch guard while he slipped from his post ).
questions teeter at the tip of his tongue ( what he missed, if he was needed later, if the kids all managed to get where they needed to go, what the hell time it was . . . ) but the words die before they are released. most of the rugrats had a key, if they needed something, they’d appear with little regard to any other plans that could be in place, & he had an inkling that if he attempted to start moving around the ache behind his eyes would reappear with a vengeance. doesn’t voice it, but dull hues shine with a gratitude . . . they are giving him an excuse to remain behind these doors, & to have a day where he didn’t spend it checking in on everyone else ( who takes care of him when he’s taking care of everyone else ? the same one who kept him functioning when running on fumes no longer became sustainable, the same one who bared their soul to him on a bathroom floor & harmonized bonnie taylor in a way only a muppet could, the same one that completed his fractured half ). ❛ i swear to god, robin . . . if you put on another double feature . . . ❜ yet not a drop of annoyance slips into his tone, if anything it’s said for the dramatic flair ( & more so done for the enjoyment of hearing their rant about how uncultured he is in ‘ the art of film ’ ).
shifts around until his head pillows against their thigh, while his thumb traces the space right above the knee with lopsided shapes & an unspeakable relief sounds in the form of a sigh as their fingers run through untamed strands ( their touch soothing, reminds him of the brief moments of contentment from a lost childhood ). a vulnerability that robin continually is the only one to see present in these moments, sees past any bullshit that he puts up to hide behind, an inexplicit trust exists & often he finds himself at a loss when their friendship is called into question. most don’t get it, how could they ? barely any know what they’ve been through together, tied to one another against the floor of a russian bunker, bound together for life. they are . . . just friends, is what he’ll say ( he’ll mean that they are everything to him, he’ll mean that they are his partner in almost every sense of the word, the one he’ll look to when scarlet clouds fill the sky & the ground shakes underneath them & there is no where else to go, he’ll mean that he doesn’t have access to the proper words but that without them . . . he wouldn’t really even be alive ) . . . but ‘ i don’t know . . . they’re just, they are my robin ’ will have do. ❛ you think they are ever gonna make another one of those back to the future flicks ? ❜
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@bukley said: ❛ don't look at me like that. ❜
he raised both eyebrows, chocolate hues never leaving robin’s figure. he was adamant about not looking away, disbelief gracing his features as his piercing gaze focused on every feature of the other’s face. he had never noticed the color of robin’s eyes or that there were freckles on her face. interesting, though absolutely irrelevant to the point he was trying to make. he could tell they were growing uncomfortable, yet he still did not look away. not until robin spoke up. clicking his tongue, dustin wrapped his arms across his chest.
❝ look at you like what? like you betrayed the entire party by renting out the goonies to some annoying middle schooler? i mean, frankly, robin. how can you call yourself our friend when we are not your priority? i am disappointed in you. ❞ a beat. ❝ and to think i actually thought you were better at this job than steve. but steve would have never rented out the goonies on my fucking birthday! ❞ it was not his birthday, but robin did not know that, right? ❝ what are we supposed to watch now? ghostbusters like common peasants? no. i refuse! ❞
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the world was saved for now . once again , for whatever reason THEY had been chosen to carry the weight ( a weight that grew heavier & heavier he might add ) and subsequently have been spared once more. HAWKINS was in absolute disarray as they were driven through and for a moment , hopper forgets there’s a headstone with his ��name on it out there. reunions all around . . . they’d spent a few moments with their children before the familiar sight of steve harrington’s car lulls to a stop outside of the barely still standing cabin in the woods . THERE’S A HEADSTONE WITH HIS NAME ON IT : JAMES RICHARD HOPPER III 1942 - 1985 . it’s etched into the faces that climb out of the car . . . you were dead and yet you’re here . something else lies there too . something hopper remembers seeing in soldiers who came back without all their comrades , something he’d seen behind murray’s eyes when they’d lost alexei. his eyes scan the kids in front of them ━ someone is missing . . . all of their comrades did not make it through this fight & his stomach drops but it’s not something he can dwell on right now. not when all of a sudden a flash of brown hair is barreling into him , enough to make him stumble slightly before his mind catches up and his arms return the sentiment holding the other close. ❛ shh . . . you’re okay. ❜ voice is barely above a whisper as fingers card through the ends of hair.
ROBIN BUCKLEY had been a surprise , a welcomed one of course with their facts and their overall opposite demeanor a stark difference to JIM HOPPER’S and yet . . . they were just another child thrust into a world of horror they never should’ve been burdened with. he’ll hold them as long as they need it ━ with his own horrors lurking over his shoulder , threatening to slink around & take him by the throat , choking him out of the moment. for the first time in eight months russia feels far away , feels like nothing compared to standing here in front of worn , young , faces that were looking to him ━ to joyce for answers they did not have. ❛ i’m here . . . i’m here and i’m not goin’ anywhere , kiddo. ❜ repeated like a mantra , the words are murmured into an unruly bob before lips press a kiss to the side of robin’s head. it was obvious that something awful hung in the air something that would have to be talked about later when the shock of seeing a ghost wears off. TRAUMA STACKED ON TRAUMA . . . god when do we get a break ? when is enough enough & we’ve proven ourselves worthy of having a normal life again ? out of his peripheral , he can see the others & after tucking robin’s head under his chin he’ll cast a look to the rest of the group. A SILENT PROMISE that this was real . . . he was here and they would all get a turn. mourning seemed synonymous with family bonding and there was time to makeup for . . . things to apologize for , questions to ask , & traumas to unpack but for now he’d hold robin buckley and any of the others who needed it for as long as they needed . the world survived eight months without him . . . what’s a few more hours ?
* BUCKLEY , ROBIN @bukley prompted : ( hug ) - for the sender’s muse to hug the receiver’s muse after an emotional moment . / found family.
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‘ do you think you could teach me how to play trumpet? ’ she’s hanging half way off the bed, fingers pressing all the buttons on the instrument as carter pretends to play. it’s heavier than she thought it would be, and she hadn’t exactly asked if she could touch it, but it was already in carter’s hands. once the blood started rushing to her head, carter spun around so she was sitting right side up beside robin. ‘ that’s definitely a dorky skill i want in my arsenal, ’ @bukley.
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“ 𝙲𝙾𝙽𝚂𝙸𝙳𝙴𝚁 𝙸𝚃 a hunch. ” it’s on the tip of her tongue to state the obvious : wherever there’s steve, there’s robin. the knowledge of it had briefly curled awkwardly in her chest for reasons she didn’t quite want to explore, but had it’s since settled into a comfort of sorts. to know that they had each other through all this. nancy sighs, a puff of breath through her nose as she perches lightly at robin’s side. smoothes her hands over the flowered pattern of her skirt, tugs the sleeve of her sweater more firmly down against bone-thin wrist. “ how…. how’ve you been? ”
@bukley said : HOW DID YOU KNOW I’D EVEN BE HERE?
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𝗶 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝗻𝗮 𝗯𝗲 𝗮 𝗽𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝗼𝗳 𝗶𝘁 - 𝙽𝙴𝚆 𝚈𝙾𝚁𝙺, 𝙽𝙴𝚆 𝚈𝙾𝚁𝙺!
@bukley, jon’s favorite pictures of robin. ♡
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INCORRECT QUOTES featuring ro.bin buckley.
for @bukley. personals do not interact. mutuals feel free. do not reblog without permission. © diesects
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