#but I also think Arthur would have a bit of ptsd and nightmares and whatnot

[noodles-and-tea]

i love your modern merthur art so i have to ask, what do you think Arthur’s favorite and least favorite thing about the 21st century would be if when he’s revived?

I think (once he gets used to it) Arthur would really appreciate technology and playing easier Nintendo games (especially if Merlin can play with (for) him)

I think he’d also like binging tv or movie series and comfy clothes (he lives in sweats) and taking very long, hot showers (figures)

As for his least favourite things I think he would occasionally get homesick, less as he grows accustomed to his new life but he would definitely miss his friends and the knights and Gwen.

:(

[sharp-teeth-and-archived]

TW: Talk of trauma, talk of violence, talk of trauma, and the effects of it, talk of ptsd. 

        I have mentioned in both my replies & headcanons on Sean before that he does experience trauma after the encounter with the bounty hunters. A lot of it was mostly focused on his flight, fight, or freeze reaction to bounty hunters (he does his best to avoid bounty hunters and get cautious when he’s on the road by himself and a fellow passes by him on a horse or a jail wagon), his insomnia & sleeping patterns & how alcohol was involved. He does experience nightmares and night terrors and often gets scared that when everyone is asleep in camp, a bounty hunter will come out of the woodwork and snatch him up. Nobody would be able to stop them, his cries wouldn’t be enough, that sort of thing. Oftentimes, he drinks until he passes out because then he might be able to get some decent shut-eye. How his poor sleeping patterns lead to him sleeping and taking those naps on guard duty.

        But when I was talking to @nckviathn​, we were talking about rdo and I mentioned that Sean sounds ooc to me in his rdo dialogue (not his opening cutscene, the first meeting, but when he’s giving out jobs). Etain brought up that perhaps his personality changed a bit after Blackwater and that incident, which changed my mindset on what I previously thought. From his input, he also mentioned how protective Sean was of Mary-Beth during the stagecoach job with Arthur. I looked more into how personality is affected and overall trauma & ptsd, so I decided to include some of that into my portrayal of Sean. So far, this is what I have included from how Sean was pre-Blackwater & how his trauma affects him overall.

        I have done research on trauma & ptsd but I do not have either of those personally, so what I said could be poorly worded, or unfactual. Please let me know if anything I said is wrong or anything that is not correctly portrayed. I know everyone is affected differently by trauma and ptsd, but I still wanted to note that. If I get anything wrong, please let me know.

        From Sean’s own words, when he was with the bounty hunters he dealt with having his feet burnt, his teeth pulled, being beaten, and being hung upside down (like we see). These are still true for my portrayal of Sean, but I do think he received other side effects (I don’t know if that’s the best way to word it) than just physical.

        I don’t see Sean as being bloodthirsty or having his morals completely twisted before he got taken into the bounty hunters. To me, Sean always dictated his actions by who deserved it or not (this ideology can still be screwy since I can still see Sean benign overall mischievous and saying a man deserved to be pick-pocketed by Sean because he believes the man was too stupid to notice Sean’s manipulative tactics. Basically a: “He deserved it!” scenario for Sean). Sean will rob rich folks who are corrupted, kill people who committed horrible acts (If Micah wasn’t involved in the gang I’m sure Sean would’ve willingly gone after him and dealt his own form of justice). Same as this, Sean has always been a reckless fellow. His trauma after the bounty hunters did not change this directly, but I can see it being a bit lessened. In rdr2’s timeline, after Blackwater, Sean has been more cautious with his robberies and actions. He will still manipulate someone and steal off them, he still finds enjoyment in chaos, but he finds more comfort in planned robberies and overall organization and a plan set in mind.  Last-minute changes can be a stressor for Sean, he can adapt but he will be scared and agitated when a plan goes off the deep end.

        Sean can still work with off the cuff stuff, like if something derails he will do anything in his power to take control of the situation and work with it, but if something is unplanned from the start: he starts to feel a bit uneasy. In Blackwater, Sean was taken by surprise when the bounty hunters knocked him out, so that same fear arises whenever a robbery or any extreme action doesn’t have a plan set in place. Sean has a large fear of being taken in by a bounty hunter and the implication of torture. Sitting in a jail cell wouldn’t bother Sean as much as if some bounty hunter came up to him and decided to transport him to federal prison (or interrogate him about the gang). Even Pinkertons and Milton’s methods scare him to a degree. Basically, having a solid foundation ahead of time makes it way easier for Sean to be at ease and not have the hairs on the back of his neck spring up.

        After Blackwater, Sean has been more cautious, like I said, but that cautious also leads to Sean being more alert and on edge. If Sean crosses a bounty hunter, he typically will refrain from robbing them or go through what he was planning because he feels an inner sense of fear benign around a bounty hunter. It reminds him of his capture and having anything close to that can bring a lot of anxiety. Etain mentioned Sean’s over-protectiveness of Mary-Beth and I see this having a role in it as well. He mentioned that his concern over her and her well-being was a reflection of his trauma. He wouldn't want her to be caught off guard or have a chance of her being swept up in what Sean got. If she was to get caught off guard, harmed, or anything of the sort -- having him being the reason for it and how far he was from her, it was something he worried over. He didn’t want her to deal with what he did. I have to mention too, in my portrayal, Sean sees the gang as a family. He wouldn’t want to see her, Arthur or anyone else from the gang hurt (except Micah and perhaps Strauss). I guess I see Sean having a sort of older brother bond with her? I can just see him being very protective of her overall.

        Sean’s trauma doesn’t restrict him from leaving camp. Sean can feel suffocated being in camp for so long that taking a trip away can feel like a breath of fresh air, but after Blackwater, this tends to be a rare activity. Sean will and can go out to town, scout out leads, and whatnot on his lonesome, but like seen in rdo, Sean will likely not set up in a cabin somewhere on his own. Even though he has the fear of someone taking him in the middle of the night, he finds more comfort surrounded by people than being on his own. If he’s camping somewhere or setting up in a vacant home, he has to have at least one other person around him to feel less tense. This fear ties back to Sean being taken away and nobody noticing. His mind warns him that next time he might not be as lucky as he was the first. Sean is still brave, ambitious, and willing to do things on his own, but he wasn’t as carefree about leaving camp, being without the gang for so long like we see in rdo (1898, pre-Blackwater). 

        A common misconception with ptsd is that a person will become violent or easily angered, this often can cause a stigma with ptsd and make it harder for someone to understand since someone might become fearful of a person with ptsd. Yes, anger can deprive from ptsd and trauma, but I wanted to say with Sean: before & after Blackwater, his anger wasn’t affected. The only thing close to it is his agitation, fear, and his scared feeling when there’s a last-minute change or when a plan derails and falls through. Sean’s temper (mostly towards Micah, Kieran, Scots, English) was always something he dealt with. In terms of Kieran, his anger was a cause of the whole feud between Dutch & Colm, he still believed Kieran was an O’Driscoll and he believed he was stronger, tougher than Kieran, which led to his bullying. His ideology of Irish politics and towards Scots & English was from his father, his beliefs were passed onto him. His father was big in politics and had a strong opinion of it, which meant that passion passed onto Sean. 

        As a long TLDR: Sean’s personality changed from the events after Blackwater by his alertness, his anxiety, he tends to stick close to people, he is more cautious in his planning and doing of things. He’s more alert & anxious. He’s protective over Mary-Beth during the stagecoach mission because he doesn’t want her to get the same thing he went through, and he doesn’t want to see any harm towards her (he’s far away to where he has less control of the situation). 

        I hope this at least made some sense here. A lot of it is hard for me to put into words, but I hope at least this was mildly interesting and gave a better perspective of my portrayal of Sean?